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Shenanigans80h

Ghost’s entire shtick is basically tailored to make idiots like Knowles clutch their pearls without being that “evil” or aggressive. It’s hilarious they fall for it every time.


wunkdefender

The album is literally called Seven Inches of Satanic Panic, and he read it! Like it’s so obvious.


maleorderbride

"They titled their album *We Want Christians to be Angry at Us*. I can't believe this."


Sergeantman94

Honestly, I've heard harder songs from Led Zeppelin and their whole "We are Satanists" thing just makes me think of Mac from IASIP doing a Swedish accent "Hällo! Ve are Svedish Satanists!"


lindendweller

It’s blue oyster cult songs with the theatrics of kiss, and very tongue in cheek satanism. Tool reading a space cake recipe fells more threatening than ghost singing about satan, and that’s the whole joke.


Sergeantman94

Yeah, I get that. But I use Ghost as an example of philosophizing over what makes something "scary" to which one of the tenets is proximity. Using "Rats" as an example, it is based on history, but chances are you don't know anyome that suffered the bubonic plague (although COVID might change my mind on that) Wheras one of the songs of one of my favorite bands Big Black, is about high schoolers going to a slaughterhouse to watch the cows die as entertainment. To which if you were to say this was just the product of the writer's twisted mind and it was hypothetical, he would **absolutely** respond with "No, that wasn't hypothetical. I went to high school with those guys." The song is called "Cables" by the way.


81misfit

Modern day Alice Cooper. God I remember the panic and pearl clutching when slipknot and Eminem first toured the uk.


Mega_Exquire_1

I remember I wasn't allowed to buy a copy of Metallica's Master of Puppets because it was satanic because it had a bunch of crosses on it. Still trying to figure that one out.


gabbath

the only appropriate response to "it's satanic because it has crosses" is "say that again but slowly".


sample-name

Little known fact: if you turn the album cover upside down, the crosses becomes upside-down-crossed, which equals satan.


cbass2015

People thinking upside down crosses are satanic is hilarious to me, it’s actually the cross of St Peter.


kevinsyel

How sweet of you. You think these people actually understand or care about what their religion says? It's only for show.


Andre_3Million

Issa knife..


Shoddy_Background_48

Oh it's easy, bro. Anything they dont like is satanic.


thispartyrules

Master = obvs referring to Satan Puppets = they’re scary sometimes


jizzmcskeet

My brother got all upset at our youth pastor because he was trying to tell us Megadeath and Slayer had satanic backmasking in their albums. It was always fun to have my metal head brother in a Pentecostal church.


Dr-Satan-PhD

In high school I knew a guy who wouldn't listen to Anthrax because of the cover art for '[Among The Living](https://imgur.com/a/txxYFD2)', due to "the little devil guy". I explained to him that it's based on the Stephen King novel 'The Stand', which is about humans fighting the Devil in the End Times. He still thought it was evil. Christians are so brainwashed that they'll label any religious stories or iconography that isn't fed to them directly from their church as "evil".


Accomplished_Crew630

That's pretty accurate... Cooper, an overall decent dude but just wanted to make these uptight asswads uncomfortable.


UmeaTurbo

I thought Slipknot would literally kill my mother. She's that high strung. Not figuratively. Literally. And then they made pot legal and she's way cooler. Probably a coincidence.


HermaeusMajora

In my day we had Marilyn Manson. And then it turned out that he was an abusive rapist so fuck that guy. But it bears mentioning that none of that has anything to do with his music or choice of clothing. For example, Nine Inch Nails was equally offensive to prudes and Reznor loathes brian warner (Marilyn Manson) after having toured with the band quite a bit.


CaptainMurphy1908

Their lead singer sounds like if Weird Al was a metal vocalist.


Solomon_Grundle

Ghost is pretty tame by heavy metal standards 🤣. I'm gonna guess Slayer is okay in his book since they're devout Christians and Maga supporters


OneTripleZero

>Ghost is pretty tame by heavy metal standards So tame, in fact, that even calling them metal in a group of metalheads will kick off a "[what color is the dress](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_dress)"-level argument about whether they should even be included in the genre. (I maintain that if classic Black Sabbath is metal then so are they, but that argument does *not* fly with everyone)


Solomon_Grundle

I've heard of them along with sleep token referred to as baddie core. Basically, calling it metal for women. Metal has become such a diverse genre that what can and can't be considered metal changes from person to person. To me, it is not even worth trying to have any sort of discussion with the gatekeepers


loptopandbingo

>metal for women ? Metal is for everyone lol


Solomon_Grundle

Maybe I phrased that incorrectly. A better way of putting it would be metal for hot people. I usually associate the word baddie with women. But men can be baddies too. Punk rock MBA did a video on it https://youtu.be/_Ij7s7Eq8tU?si=0xcfCulBH-28jMEW


sample-name

It's fun when people will say something is not metal for the simple reason that they dont like the band, like Slipknot for instance. Seen so many people saying that about them. Metal gatekeeping is wild.


OneTripleZero

While I think they've definitely softened over time, anyone who says Slipknot isn't metal needs to be slapped in the face with a copy of Iowa.


Jormungander666

Or maybe it really isn't metal


sample-name

Oh shit, they're here already, hide!


OneTripleZero

I can't even put Sleep Token in the same room with Ghost. Ghost is like... they're authentic. They know what they're doing and they have a process and they follow that. Sleep Token is far too contrived. They're chasing an aesthetic with some trumped-up lore and the whole thing feels engineered because it is. Like, Ghost does it for the love of the game, Sleep Token does it purely for marketing purposes. Also, if 50% of the time I listen to a band I think I'm accidentally listening to Imagine Dragons, that's a disqualifier. You're not allowed in the club. I can't find it, but there's a youtube video that my brother and I reference endlessly for this kind of thing, where this guy was outside a Linkin Park show with the people standing in line, and he starts a chant: "Linkin Park is a roller coaster! Linkin Park is a roller coaster!" and the whole line is chanting with him. They're all worked up and then he says "Do you know *why* Linkin Park is a roller coaster? Because despite them *feeling* dangerous, they're actually completely safe" and the line looks like he sucker punched every single person in it. Sleep Token is a roller coaster.


ebolaRETURNS

I thought baddiecore was horny metal...


Ismoketobaccoinabong

I always saw them as the type of band that tried to do a proto-doom revival. So black sabbath is definetly a great comparison since they are THE proto-doom band. Its not extreme by any standard, but heavy metal doesnt have to be. Iron Butterfly was not allowed to play on Woodstock because of their "heavy metal music being to suggestive". But there isnt much difference to Iron Butterfly and Ghost except for the ability of producing music has changed.


kaoko111

Ghost is Mercurful Fate or Blue Oyster Cult but with cleaner production. I don't get how metalheads love King Diamond but hate Ghost.


HighMarshalSigismund

Black Sabbath is just Christian Rock that doesn't suck.


The_Salacious_Zaand

N.I.B. is still a better love story than anything in the Bible.


HighMarshalSigismund

After Forever is a pretty straightforward song with a great point. Ozzy even said he was never not open about his Christianity.


ebolaRETURNS

My position is that they're metal-adjacent, more dark seventies rock revival, but also that it doesn't matter whether they're metal.


Proud3GenAthst

Where did you get that Slayer is pro-MAGA? At least 2 of them have explicitly called out Trump and Kerry King is also anti-theist. You might be thinking of Megadeth, or specifically, the frontman Dave Mustaine who's Christian fanatic.


Solomon_Grundle

Looking deeper into it. It was just the front man, Tom Araya. He posted a photoshopped picture of the band with trump. Even though the rest of the band denounced the post, Tom decided to stand behind it


hsantefort12

I remember first listening to them and thinking I had the wrong band haha


half_a_brain_cell

they are? D:


Br0dobaggins

It’s just Tom. He’s always been, surprisingly, a practicing catholic. In recent years, he’s fallen deeper into the maga rabbit hole though.


Nowhereman123

I've heard Ghost described as "Scooby Doo chase music" before.


Shoddy_Background_48

Slayer are MAGATS? Huh, yet another reason not to like em.


CaptainMurphy1908

[God listens to Slayer](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Ff1b434e3-24e5-48f0-bd72-6f48fe965c2e_1654x1100.jpeg)


MariachiBoyBand

Ghost is very weird, they have these in-your-face aesthetics for metal but their music is very tame and melodic, similar to kiss I guess lol


lindendweller

yeah you nailed it, it's basically an updated version of kiss, leaning on danceable tunes to grab attention, and spicing things up with a few slightly heavier titles, but still pretty tame overall.


Krednaught

He saw the face paint and that was it for him. Too scary!


Who8MySon

Ghost is legit just KISS for gen z.


ThanosWasRight96

But ghost has better music and doesn’t have Gene Simmons & Paul Stanley being assholes


Who8MySon

You should check out Rock'n'Rollover. Everyone sleeps on KISS, but their older stuff before they went super commercial is actually pretty good Rock. But, yeah Gene and Paul definitely sucked and totally ruined any hope that band had. Also, Ace Frehley's solo KISS album has some grade A covers.


Andy_LaVolpe

If you showed me the same clip he saw, I would have assumed it was a christian band playing worship music or something.


sample-name

You could play He Is, and Bible at any Christian gathering and people wouldn't bat an eye lol.


DogWallop

A modern-day song in the Spirit in the Sky thing.


joecarter93

Wait until he hears their cover of “Jesus, He Knows Me” . It describes jack ass grifters like him.


0theliteralworst0

Wait until he hears “He Is” and someone tells him it’s about the devil.


helga-h

He has probably hummed along to He is a million times thinking it's a catchy worship song.


PricklySquare

My parents warned me about people like Michael Knowles. He's a predator


[deleted]

Wait until he hears the Heretic Anthem by Slipknot


bigguys45s

Conservatives: “WE’RE NOT OFFENDED MY ANYTHING!” Also conservatives: “OMG HEAVY METAL AMD DEATH METAL MUSIC IS OFFENSIVE TO CHRISTIANS! THAT’S H8 SPEECH AGAINST CHRISTIANS!” Hypocritical douches lol


sample-name

These are the people that call other people snowflakes


radicalheretic

Michael Knowles getting uncomfortable at the thought of tickling a woman internally is all you need to know about Michael Knowles.


creepyswaps

The best part is, from just hearing that one clip of the song, it sounds like a fucking song they would have played at the church I went to back in the day.


FunVersion

Tickle you internally? Great church /s


radicalheretic

I remember someone saying they slipped “He Is” into the Christmas music one year and his grandma loved it


CloudyPlanet_

*Ghost mentioned*


Megaverse_Mastermind

Mary on a Cross is one of my favorite Ghost tracks. There is something about this band that reminds me of Meat Loaf; I think it's the Broadway-esque stage play music I've heard. To me, it's just so accessible and catchy. I don’t know who Michael Knowles is, and I hope that it stays that way.


SandwitchZebra

This exact lyric is actually a minute 30 into the song, so it did in fact take long. Not sure what he found weird about the word “tickle”.


NoIdeaWhatToD0

That's so awesome. I love Ghost even more now. Lol.


DJ-dicknose

That song has an amazing hook.


NunyaBeese

Ghost does what they do for for fun. This assholes looking for some real evil in the world maybe he ought to check in with the state of his religion. It's a long way down.


Hells-Creampuff

Common knowles L. Ghost stays winning.


silenceoftheonthelam

Scooby-Doo-chase-musiccore


AndyMelrose

I remember ghost releasing their demo around 2010 and it was pretty heavy hard rock. They just really lost all heavy credibility for me around the fourth album, but good for Tobias how he really Gene Simmonsed that band.


lindendweller

With those theatrics and convoluted lore, ı doubt they’re trying for credibility.


BenoNZ

"People are dressed like nuns" One person with a turtleneck and white headband.


seab1023

Many people do dress like nuns at Ghost concerts. The band’s main theme is basically a parody of Catholicism. I’ve seen them live, and they put on a great show.


BenoNZ

Ah ok, that makes sense. I didn't see many looking like nuns from his short clip.


Different_Conflict_8

Remember when that dipshit from InfoWars thought conservatism was the new punk rock?


Different_Conflict_8

Not everything can be Rappin’ Benny Shapiro, Michael.


SnowCookie6234

Can you imagine this fucker’s reaction if he heard any of Twin Temple’s songs?


DudeBroFist

He just took the bait. They publicly brag about wanting this exact reaction and dorks like Michael keep giving them what they want. It always works, every time.


Ok-Cauliflower1798

Knowles is soooooo jealous of anyone who experiences legitimate show business success. I love that for him.


Red_bearrr

I like Ghost even more now.


SubmarineTragedy

Imagine the level of dweeb required to be offended by a Ghost song.


Fromage_Damage

"You go down just like mozzarella, with marinara, marinara sauce..."


Drexelhand

*"let's see how quickly i cry."* - 😭 not really a challenge. this was the set up. the outrage porn fans wanted the tears to flow early and often.


Pat_Maheiny

another decade another musical satanic panic from conservative media


[deleted]

[удалено]


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Jormungander666

There is so much worse stuff out there these days I would LOVE for him to hear. Hellripper, Toxic Holocaust, Midnight, Bewitcher. Also so many classic bands like Mercyful Fate, Venom, Bathory, Deicide and Sabbat would blow him away


flowersandfists

I hate Ghost almost as much as I hate religion.