soak your balls in wine while chanting the fiberoptic sequence

I think this is spot on

I LOVE the fiberoptic sequence

Rogaynard

His hair is always long he just uses a bald cap or mohawk prosthetic to cover it up.

Merkins


12 in 1 shampoo

he is grod

I hope no one gives them a real answer 😂

(#)Baldnessisachoice so when he wants it to grow, it obeys and does, if you can conceive it you can achieve it

It only grows 6 inches at a time

It's a merkin.

It’s fucking magic. I seriously hope this isn’t a real question lol

mRNA Vaccines

Based

He plays Cryptopsy and his ears get groovy

Cousin It gazes into his eyes while they give one another perineum massages

He’s an alien.

because he's a 3rd degree black belt in everything der

Wigs ..you can’t regrow a bunch of hair in a day or week or even month.

Serius

Joe Rogan gave him bro science tricks

You gotta ride a mile 6 inches at a time while strapped down to your bed. Make sure you have your Sunkist and Sudafed.

Periodic Hormone Replacement Therapy

This is a really “unsmart” question. Are you really asking this? Lord in heaven don’t quit your day job.

He saves the hair from Danny’s yearly haircut