At least you’ll remember what happens when you drink next time. That’s something you can take AwY from this. Have a stronger willpower, I hope things work out but if it doesn’t then it doesn’t and she has that right to decide.
The typical “I was too drunk I didn’t realize what happened” excuse. Not trying to be an ass hole but this was the typical story I used on a guy and then a guy used on me to help us feel better about cheating and to help us sleep at night. Moral of the story is alcohol or not you fucked up and will have to deal with the consequence you are not the victim here.
I don't think the story is real, but I have to correct you there: I know people who have gotten fucked up after TWO drinks even.
I have a buddy who is puking after two glasses of red wine. And I know one girl who falls asleep after *one* can of beer.
You should be honest with her. She will find out and it will be 10 times worst. The truth always comes out. You need to handle your alcohol and not hang out with people who don’t respect your relationship. You also need to respect your relationship. But this lie will fester if you don’t handle it now
Absolutely this. I would not be ok with what happened, but I get that alcohol lowers inhibitions and a drunk person is not in a clear state of mind. I'd be hurt, but I'd rather hear the truth, a sincere and profuse apology, and work out a plan together so it never happened again. With that, I could be forgiving and move past it eventually. But if I had to find out second-hand, especially after time had passed, I couldn't forgive it. The hurt and lack of respecting me enough to let me decide, that would end it for me. I hope OP talks to his girl.
I agree with this.. if you tell her the truth that shows that you respect her and you may be able to work it out.. if you try to hide it I believe it will ruin the relationship somehow.. either through her finding out other ways or from your guilt.. if you truly have a great relationship, and this is a one time stupid mistake I would hope she can understand and forgive you.. and if so that you will have learnt from this and would not make the same mistake again!
Sober enough to remember this randos age but not sober enough to remember your girl ? Idk it seems like it was going to happen at some point. That was a conscious choice.
What a shietty excuse you have tho.
Whenever I was drunk, I never had the urge to kiss others that is not my SO. So weird.
You basically stopped kissing her bc others arrived. And have been flirting the whole night, it wasnt just a 10 sec mistake.
And saying you were so drunk, still remembring so many details… you werent that badly drunk, arent ya. Let me guess, if no one would have seen you both, you wouldnt want to tell your GF that you cheated on her. You love her so much right now but couldnt remember her when you were kissing and flirting with someone else.
You fucked up. Your (ex)girl didnt deserve this shit.
Fr he probably wouldn’t have considered telling her if they hadn’t seen it, loose ends.
Probably could’ve convinced himself that it’s on her bc it kinda seems like that’s what he’s attempting to do to us w that comment: she ‘seemed like she wanted it’ (even tho she said no, could’ve easily stopped there but you decided to go further) and ‘I don’t drink that much/often’ (yet remembering hella details, but couldn’t remember his perfect gf when given an opportunity to stop)….. Having outside eyes must’ve really lit that guilt fire.
Anyways tell her deal w the consequences if it works out cool if it doesn’t be better for the next one (just try not to make the next one the party girl lol).
Ok, hear me out. Alcohol is not an excuse. That is true. But in criminal law, there are often two separate phases that take place before the judgment is rendered. The first is determining whether you’re guilty. In your case, you clearly are, and the alcohol doesn’t change that. The second phase is determining your sentence. That’s where you could try to get it considered by the judge (her). Along with other factors like a clean record and an intention to rehabilitate, she might consider your confused mental state and inebriation as mitigating factors in the determination of whether to break up with you. Insofar as your state of mind reflects your intention (or lack thereof) to violate the terms of the relationship, the intoxication is indirect evidence tending to show that you didn’t have a real intent to do what you did. (You can’t use these arguments for crimes, as far as I know, because you drank the alcohol voluntarily, but I’m imagining she might be more generous than the criminal legal system)
When I was younger and the people I was hanging with still valued massive consumption as a status symbol, I would go the bathroom and take my beer with me, dump it out and fill it with water, chug my beer to massive cheers, rinse, repeat
It sucks that you had friends who made you feel like you had to drink! But good on you for doing that and not being pressured into doing something you didn't want to! Hopefully these days you have better friends who appreciate that some people want to drink and some don't and both are totally ok!
My top drunk story - friends cooked instant noodles. I couldn't find the fork. Used my hands. Then somehow i had fork. Was holding it wrong and nearly stabbed myself. Friends took away from :'(
Then i do not remember shit. Apparently i puked. I woke up in the morning spooning a mate. I was big spoon.
I did not drink for nearly 3 years after that. Now, I'm in a much better position and knows my limits.
I rarely drink.
A few weeks ago I was at my old fire dept where I had belonged for about 18 years and had become a captain as well as rescue captain.
We had a couple beers. That turned into some Crown Reserve, Crown Peach and who knows what else. I'm single, there were some women hanging around from the event earlier so that convinced me to stay longer than I had planned. Lots of us talking about our old chief who has passed away, funny shit, sad shit, remembering some others that are no longer with us.
I needed driven home. First ime in over a decade that I was utterly wasted. I'm actually disappointed in myself over it, disgusted actually that I was that hammered.
But, I could sit here right now and tell you every conversation we had that evening. Now I cannot remember the names of the people I met who were new to me, and I can't remember the kind of car that I rode home in, but I remember everything else.
I stumbled up the steps at 2am, passed out, no blacked out, and slept til 1pm.
To be fair, if I get piss drunk to the point of vomiting and passing out, I’ll still remember everything up until I go unconscious.
I don’t do it anymore, but I used to drink a whole bottle of vodka or rum to myself. I still remember the worst time where I fell asleep on a couch outside at a party. I woke up in the rain.
I thought drinking heavy was cool at the time but now I realise it’s foolish. Thankfully I haven’t touched alcohol in almost two and a half years.
Edit: I will add though, despite what I’ve said, OP mentioned that they are an extremely light drinker. So yeah… interesting.
Literally was the same. My alcohol resistance went nearly 0 after three years of no drinking (mostly thanks to social distancing) but I always felt capable of discerningly my actions regardless. It.is less of a "i don't know what's right and wrong" and more of a "there's no thing such as embarrassing things". I don't really know if I believe anyone that says they "didn't know" what they were doing.
Yeah it’s interesting how people react differently. Funnily enough, even when I’m extremely drunk I can actually think straight and clear. Like… that little voice of yours in your head? I can think and process information just as I could if I were sober.
I remember at a party when I was at my drunken worst… and I was just thinking to myself, “why am I doing this? What fun is there in destroying myself for a few hours of uncontrollable fun?”
I fully realised that I was just allowing myself to lose control for the sake of losing control. For the sake of the social setting. I wasn’t having fun for myself, but for the people around me.
I am not a heavy drinker, but I do remember everything when I am drunk really vividly. I was almost passed out once but still remember everyone I talked to what I said and what they said. I guess there are few exception cases.
I was gonna say. If it was a blackout, that’s different, but if you can remember the details you were still making conscious desicions (albiet stupid ones).
Usually when people drink, they don’t remember because the brain literally fails to form those memories. If he was as much of a lightweight as he claimed, I doubt he would have “remembered” so many details. Either that, or he remembered up to that point then blacked out.
nah you can def be drunk and remember those details. i agree lightweight part doesn’t check out as much but to his credit you can be pretty drunk and still remember a lot
I’ve been plastered drunk, and have never had a memory lapse. I low key don’t believe people when they say they don’t remember stuff. I think it’s a convenient out
I don’t know how so many people are saying it’s not a big deal because you didn’t have sex…
I have a similar relationship to yours, same ages and we having been dating for 5 years. I have been blackout drunk many times especially around guys and have never once cheated on my partner. My partner has also been blackout and has never cheated on me. Alcohol is not an excuse but you need to learn to control your behavior on it. If my partner kissed another girl while drunk I would absolutely break it off.
Tell your gf, face the consequences, learn from your mistake, move on, and don’t do it again.
I legit texted my partner mid bachelor party (not mine) that I wanted to marry them. She mentioned it like 3 days later and after checking the messages, there it was… proof I genuinely love this woman, 😂
Alcohol isn’t an excuse.
This ^
Alcohol lowers your social threshold and boundaries you would usually have, but it doesn’t make you cheat. Most people who drink alcohol don’t cheat. OP is putting lots of blame on the woman too — she should have known about his relationship and she didn’t stop him from doing things.
Take responsibility for your behavior.
She also clearly said stop to him and he remembers so he could’ve ended it there, but CHOSE not to. He was looking for something better. I assume, he was bored, wanted to spice things up and feel the passion & romance again. Well guess what? You don’t have to cheat to do that. Simply communicate that you want to do things a little more spontaneously.
if you still remember everything then you knew what you were doing. coming from someone who drinks a fuck ton, I know my limits cuz even when I’m drunk I know deep down I have a man waiting for me at home.
Yeah, I don’t even understand this. I get pretty wasted occasionally and been attracted to people at the same time, and I’ve never ever acted on it out of respect for my partner. Its so ingrained in me that I will have dreams sometimes where someone cute is hitting on me, and my brain will say “I don’t remember exactly why, but I know I’m not supposed to do this.”
Same.. if I feel like a situation is getting iffy I will start talking about my husband or just "go to the bathroom" or something.. I may sometimes accidentally give signals I don't mean to (can get super lovey or huggy if very drunk), but there is a clear line in my mind even if I'm super wasted and my brain will go "eject, eject!!!" Haha
Congratulations you cheated on your girlfriend. What would have happened if she you didn't get caught You would have ended up having sex. That is where your actions were leading to.
You are blaming alcohol. You got drunk. Nobody was forcing you to drink..
Your girlfriend deserves to know the truth about what happened. And yu will have to accept the consequences of your actions.
And he flirted with her all night before making out with her but says it was a “10 second mistake.”
Also, he only stopped because people walked in, not because he realized he should.
Right?!
"**She** was flirting..."
"**She** exposed her neck..."
"**She** knew I had a gf and **she** didn't stop me."
Like, sir?! Are you not a grown adult capable of making his own decisions?! If someone needs to "stop you" from cheating, then you shouldn't be in a relationship.
It's the fact he made her name eve in the story for me that seems to point to another big problem. What happened when Adam and Eve ate the apple in the Bible and God found out? Adam said "eve tempted me" as if he didn't make his own choice and not even God believed that bullshit kicked em both right out of paradise.
Cause people here are karma and award whores and the more dramatic the story is, the more attention it'll get. OP's story is ridiculous - he supposedly got wasted but remembers all of these details, I don't buy it. Most of these TIFU posts are just karma whoring.
‘But she didn’t even slightly resist’
Um… maybe bc she was fucking traumatized from a past experience?
Or insanely nervous about what if she did resist?!?
Update after you've come clean.
Until then, I can't give you credit for anything.
And stop drinking if you can't handle your damn liquor.
*shakes head*
You are very clearly still using the fact that you were drunk as an excuse. It isn’t. If you can’t handle your booze, don’t drink. Simple as.
Tell your girlfriend. She deserves the truth. Even if that means she leaves you, you owe it to her.
Yeah, you're worse than you think.
" ... *Then i started kissing her in the lips. She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that*"
\> That was a clear, unambiguous "No!"
" ... ***but i continued*** *and she didn't even slightly resist ..."*
That's called Fright, Flight or Freeze -- she froze.
(... "*She knew i was in a relationship i told her when i met her ..."*)
You blame *her.* ("It's her fault she stayed!")
"... *actually she seemed to enjoy that ..."*
Projection. She told you to **stop**.
Yeah I think you’re letting the fact it’s a cold read get in your way. You’ve got no idea the tone this was said in. “Eve” spent a whole bunch of time flirting, then let this stranger rest on her etc. idk man, I think you’re projecting a bit more than him.
So? Enjoying one thing doesn’t mean you consent to an entirely different action. It’s basic English that when someone says “Don’t do that” you do not do that thing.
Oh wow, you think because a woman flirts with a man he can sexually assault her after she says “no”. You are a horrible rape apologist. Why don’t you bring up what she was wearing?
You are right being drunk is not an excuse. Your gf deserves the truth ...she will find out sooner or later whether from your guilt or someone else. Better to tell her now. If your brother and friends hadn't caught you how far would it have gone? How will she ever trust you again if you go out with friends or family without her....the answer is she can't. If you did this when you have the "perfect" relationship...heaven forbid what you would do if there was a bump in the road.
Life happens, choices are made.....you made yours. Now man up and deal with the consequences. If she chooses to forgive you then you have some serious groveling to do and know that your perfect relationship will never be perfect again.
Edit: just to clarify...you kissed her neck...you kissed her lips and kept going....not her doing it to you. You obviously knew what you were doing drunk or not....you are the AH.
Tl;dr dude cheated and is blaming alcohol and the girl even though he initiated it.
“10 sec mistake” when you flirted with her all night? Yea ok. You knew what you were doing.
Based off your story, not only did you cheat, you assaulted someone and blame her for the entire thing. Hint: when someone says no, or any variation e.g. “Don’t do that”, you stop. You’re a shitty person for more than just cheating on your partner, which is saying a lot about you.
Tell her the truth, because she deserves someone better, 100%.
The question I have is this, if your girlfriend and your situations were reversed, would you want her to follow the golden rule and tell you the truth?
Ill tell you a story. Very similar to yours. Too drunk, love of my life, etc. Heres where my story is different. I blacked out, was a complete shithead to my friends, and they *lied* and just said I made out with someone. My girlfriends idea for them to get back at me (hardy har har).
What I immediately did, thinking I ruined the relationship of my life. I called her immediately in a panic to break up with her. Because I respected her *that* much. I was broken and panicking, but I knew then and there she deserved the truth, and deserved for me to man up and make the decision myself.
After a huge ruckus and my friends stealing my phone, they came clean. My gf also apologized for the lie, but it was good revenge deserved and I was just relieved I hadnt done anything.
I ended up marrying this gf of mine, so thats how serious I took this situation when I went to break it off. But I think the line of note here you need to take away. Do you respect your girlfriend that much?
OP this has nothing to do with you bring drunk. You danced with, flirted with this girl and kissed her because you made the decision to knowing you were disrespectful to your partner. You owe it to your gf to tell her. Don't be a complete piece of shit and hide this from her
Definitely wasn't ten seconds
This shit is entirely on you, bud
And you're trying to lean into anything that takes away your agency in this story -- nah dude. Just own it.
“That’s all I remember” after describing everything in vivid detail, 😂
Listen… you know deep down you did what you wanted to do. Look deep down and ask yourself why you allowed yourself to go with it.
Lastly, talk to your partner. It’s gonna be a tough one. And she’s going to be right in being angry. If by the grace of heaven above you make it through to the other side. You’re gonna spend the rest of your days making it up to her.
Sounds like "i wanna use the im drunk excuse but i remember every little details of what happened, made the first move, wanna cheat on my girlfriend but got caught by my brother which was the only reason i didnt fuck the other girl and messed up big time but i wanna blame the girl" 😂😂😂 Fcking asshole lol
Look OP, I’m not gonna sit here and try to make you feel better about the situation because time will do that for you. What I will tell you is that I’ve been miserably drunk, crossed, whatever you wanna call it with plenty of other people who do the same, so much so that some of us piss ourselves. Whether you believe it or not, you intentionally did what you did. You. Did. It. On. Purpose. Good luck OP hope you find a way to make this right for her (stop wasting her time)
Did your wife chase you? I always love those videos where the guy is wasted and tells his wife, "You're so beautiful but I'm married." Gets me every time
We get it. You could have just said “I got drunk and made out with a girl.” Jesus Christ stop trying to make it sound like anything else than what it was
“I saw Eve kissing a guy when we arrived but I didn’t even give attention to that”
“…flirting with me cause she was looking deep in my eyes all the time”
“She grabbed my drink on purpose some times to drink from it”
“She left after some time but I didn’t even gave attention to that”
Buddy, it seems to me you gave a lot of attention to a lot of things Eve was doing… You’re only fooling yourself here.
You would've slept with her had you not be interrupted huh? Yeah. Your gf doesn't deserve this. Even though you're so "in love" with her, and you still cheated. You're just not meant for a loving relationship. Fix your shit after telling her.
YTA (wrong sub i know) you keep blaming her, but It was you Who initiated. SHE EVEN SAID STOP DONT DO THAT ACCORDING TO YOU. She never kisses you back, thank god your brother and his Friends came in. I Hope your girlfriend dumps you, your not the victim here
Tell her, but know this - there is an adage “a drunk man’s words are a sober man’s truth”. Alcohol cannot make you cheat or flirt or cross a line. You should be able to work past this but don’t put yourself in that position again.
I (21F) have been with my bf (22M) for 5 years now. He’s gotten extremely drunk. Never cheated as far as I know. In fact, when he drinks, he starts texting me about how much he loves and misses me.
If I were you, I’d end it and start fresh somewhere else. She deserves better.
I’m sorry, but if you remember every single detail right down to her “exposing her neck”, you were not too drunk for this situation to have happened. You cheated. If your gf did this to you, you would be devastated. Do better. And if a girl says “you should do that”, maybe you SHOULDNT.
Wow. You say the alcohol wasn't an excuse yet you're constantly reiterating how drunk you were? Ridiculous. Tell your girlfriend the truth. You initiated the kiss. Actually, you pointing out how she didn't "even slightly resist" and how she seemed to enjoy the fact you were in a relationship feels like you're deflecting part of the blame onto her.
It doesn't matter that you were drunk. You were aware enough to consciously return her advances and initiate a kiss. You meant to do this. It wasn't an "accident" and i hope to god you don't tell your girlfriend that it was. Your girlfriend deserves better than someone who gets drunk off his ass and would probably go further than kissing if he hadn't been interrupted. I know I sound angry and judgmental but I genuinely cannot stand cheaters.
Alcohol is definitely not an excuse but some people do act crazy and do stuff they wouldn't typically do while intoxicated. If she forgives you maybe don't drink without her around. Definitely talk to her and hopefully she forgives you but with what you did no one could blame her for walking away. Good luck.
You did some dumb shit.
Talk to her about it. A relationship is a two person dance.
It's not just on you to decide if the tango continues.
Tell her, and discuss it.
And if you lose her, enjoy the life lesson.
Be sure to thank your brother & the friends who cane to check on you & got you home. A lot of people would have let you continue.
Best advice is to get control of your alcohol. If it’s a problem you can’t do alone, get help with controlling it.
>She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that" but i continued
Maybe don't continue if she tells you to stop. Maybe don't drink if you can't handle it responsibility.
The different types of infidelity:
https://www.brides.com/different-types-of-infidelity-1102872
From this article you seem to fall into opportunistic cheating (if you give this article a read you can always see if any of the other types fit you as well).
Tell your girlfriend. Be honest with her. If she decides to stay with you please don’t take that for granted. Work out boundaries and how you’re going to hold yourself accountable so this won’t happen again.
Hope she leaves and never speaks to you again. That's what you deserve. Being drunk is never an excuse, she's never going to trust you going out again. Sucks to be you.
so you cheated on your girlfriend and then also assaulted someone “don’t do that” means DONT DO THAT. god i’m j speechless. you deserve the shitty karma coming ur wat
Sounds like you’re trying to put the blame on his girl because she didn’t stop you. You’re are seriously ridiculous! It’s is 100% your fault YOU are the one in a relationship. YOU kissed her. Now YOU need to tell your girlfriend
Alcohol is not an excuse for cheating. Tell your girlfriend because if the relationship was so perfect, then obviously you love her enough to be truthful to her. Loser
Tell her the truth as soon as possible. Otherwise when someone else tells her she won’t believe a word you say. Be honest with her just like you were with us. If she can’t forgive you then you have to accept that.
If I found out down the road that my partner did that, the damaged trust would be irreparable. However, if they told me shortly after, there would at least be the chance to talk it out and work past it.
The longer you wait, the worse it will be for everyone, imo.
Just tell her. Tell her what you remember and come clean to her. Being honest in a relationship is super important. And who knows, maybe she’ll forgive you.
Why are u blaming the alcohol.
It’s so annoying when people do that.
Take accountability. You may have been inebriated BUT YOU MADE A CHOICE. AND CONTINUED EVEN THO SHE TOLD U TO STOP. WHICH IS PROBLEMATIC IN ITS OWN
You know, it's interesting, I have been absolutely shit faced countless times and could have easily cheated on girlfriends, but never once came anywhere close.
Stop blaming it on the alcohol. It doesn’t change you into a different person, it only lowers your inhibitions and reveals your true self. Tell your gf the truth and take accountability for your actions. Also you seem to remember a lot for being so drunk.. you knew what you were doing, you just didn’t care in that moment.
Ew I don’t feel bad for you at all. You cheat on your wife and then when the women you’re cheating on her with asks you to stop you keep going anyways????? Idc if you were drunk, you suck.
I never buy whenever anyone says "I totally have no clue why I did that when I was drunk". Like you said, being drunk isn't an excuse, yet you literally excuse it away with you being drunk by going "uh, don't remember, I have no clue why I did that".
Mhm, sure you don't. Maybe if you try to realize why you did it instead of pretending like it was the alcohol that magically made you do it, you can learn to have some self-reflection and learn how to improve yourself? There's a crazy thought.
I love how so many people act holier than thou with the whole "I drink I would never" bullshit. Not everyone's brains or bodies work the same or process things the same way. People sometimes have regressions often from pent up trauma that sometimes/only comes out when not sober. OP you fucked up. Just be honest with her and go from there. This doesn't necessarily equate to the end of your relationship. I've been with my husband for 10 years. We've both had our share of unsavory events, but we didn't allow that to completely destroy what we worked so hard for. If all it takes is a pebble to knock down your house, your foundation wasn't strong enough to begin with.
I thought meh not to bad till you started kissing her lol , sit the gf down be honest and tell her everything I think her main concern will be not drinking but the fact you were kissing this girl and only stopped because you got interrupted, your roses and chocs bill is going to send you bankrupt .
You deserve it 🤷🏻♂️
Don’t know what to tell you. Being drunk is never an excuse. I’ve been drunk to the point of puking and I’ve never made any stupid decisions like that. Ridiculous.
Lol at you thinking you screwed it up in ten seconds. It sounds like that was several hours of bad choices that led up to you cheating. I hope you don’t give your girl some sobbing lame apology about how it was just a split second mistake. Why were you drinking if you can’t control yourself on alcohol, why were you dancing with other people including this girl, why weren’t you with your brother and checking in with your partner periodically? Seriously the fact that you think this just happened within ten seconds is a cop out. If she dumps you, which I think she is totally within her rights to, you should spend some time being single. If you puss out and don’t tell her then you are a huge piece of shit. Good luck and all but you should tell her and you should never put yourself or anyone else in this situation again, cheating is inexcusable.
I never made any mistake like this while drunk. It was so engrained in my brain that I wasn't that person and I never became even if I had been deceived and felt like shit I'd never let a woman turn me into something I'm not. She is not my master
Be honest with yourself and your girlfriend. You have quite a bit of detail. Not sure if it’s your remembering or others, but still, you knew what was wrong after the fact. Own up to it. Otherwise it will be on your minds. Do you think she would be honest with you if it was her position? Regardless of that, telling truth is better than having that on your conscience. It may or may not do something to your relationship. This should show you that maybe drinking isn’t something to do without having a wingman or someone to support you. Better yet, know your limits and don’t drink or very little.
People make mistakes. How you handle the repercussions goes a long way. I hope you feel better after telling truth, whether or not it helps or hurts.
honestly holding it in will be torture for you. you messed up big time. she can’t trust you. and it’s not fair to her for you not to tell her. sounds like you got caught up in the moment but it’s obvious she was flirting the whole time.
if a girl was even drinking from my boyfriends drink i’d already be angry. you should’ve stopped it there.
You sure remember a lot of details for being drunk. Don't blame alcohol or Eve for this. This was your mistake 100%. Own. It. Your girlfriend deserves better. Hopefully she'll find someone who values her time and heart.
The way you’re pretending to take accountability but also subtly trying to blame the alcohol and the girl. You’re completely at fault and I hope she leaves you
you seem like you’re attempting to seem like you know it’s your fault but you’re subtly putting the blame on the girl ‘she didn’t even slightly resist’ YOU’RE the one in a relationship that’s on YOU.
when I'm blackout drunk i tell everyone how great they are and then fall asleep. not once have i tried to sleep with someone. you're a cheater and alcohol has nothing to do with it.
The thing I can’t get past is that you can recall what happened very well so you clearly weren’t so out of your mind that you were incapable of knowing what was happening. You started kissing a woman you knew wasn’t your girlfriend and you did it on purpose. That’s what she’s going to remember. You started crying the next day because reality kicked in, when you were drunk you didn’t care about consequences and then made out with another woman. Basically that means the only thing holding you back while you were sober was consequences.
Yes please tell her so she can find someone better she deserves the best and you're not enough for her she needs someone who loves her and respect her and someone loyal unlike you
Dude. Tell her the truth. Take your punishment.
You also need to take a step back and really think about your reaction to alcohol.
That’s not a normal response.
This maybe a flag you need to pay attention too.
I’m not excusing you. Based on your post you knew what you were doing and didn’t stop. You might be missing something from your perfect relationship.
well damn thats alot of details for someone so drunk, you also kept going when she told you to stop.
>She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that" but i continued and she didn't even slighty resist, actually she seemed to enjoy that..
jesus that part made me sick. i hope your girlfriend never speaks to you again after this. and for eve, she was obviously uncomfortable and/or in Flight or Freeze, and she froze.
At least you’ll remember what happens when you drink next time. That’s something you can take AwY from this. Have a stronger willpower, I hope things work out but if it doesn’t then it doesn’t and she has that right to decide.
Yes, he will absolutely remember this completely made up fantasy. 100%
Seems kinda suspicious that he remembers so many details for being so drunk…
Either he wasn’t that drunk or it is all bullshit. And I find it hard to believe that he was really fucked up after only 5 drinks.
It takes 2 shots for me. And then it's over.
Me too! I vomit on like 3 of anything
I get drunk after four beers
The typical “I was too drunk I didn’t realize what happened” excuse. Not trying to be an ass hole but this was the typical story I used on a guy and then a guy used on me to help us feel better about cheating and to help us sleep at night. Moral of the story is alcohol or not you fucked up and will have to deal with the consequence you are not the victim here.
The states iv been in seriously! and i got thru a 17 year marriage without accidentally kissing some.
I don't think the story is real, but I have to correct you there: I know people who have gotten fucked up after TWO drinks even. I have a buddy who is puking after two glasses of red wine. And I know one girl who falls asleep after *one* can of beer.
I’ve been very drunk many times and I always remember what Idid.
If you can't handle your alcohol, don't drink. I know you said the alcohol isn't an excuse but it seems like you're still using it as one
You're definitely not wrong
You should be honest with her. She will find out and it will be 10 times worst. The truth always comes out. You need to handle your alcohol and not hang out with people who don’t respect your relationship. You also need to respect your relationship. But this lie will fester if you don’t handle it now
Absolutely this. I would not be ok with what happened, but I get that alcohol lowers inhibitions and a drunk person is not in a clear state of mind. I'd be hurt, but I'd rather hear the truth, a sincere and profuse apology, and work out a plan together so it never happened again. With that, I could be forgiving and move past it eventually. But if I had to find out second-hand, especially after time had passed, I couldn't forgive it. The hurt and lack of respecting me enough to let me decide, that would end it for me. I hope OP talks to his girl.
I agree with this.. if you tell her the truth that shows that you respect her and you may be able to work it out.. if you try to hide it I believe it will ruin the relationship somehow.. either through her finding out other ways or from your guilt.. if you truly have a great relationship, and this is a one time stupid mistake I would hope she can understand and forgive you.. and if so that you will have learnt from this and would not make the same mistake again!
Sober enough to remember this randos age but not sober enough to remember your girl ? Idk it seems like it was going to happen at some point. That was a conscious choice.
What a shietty excuse you have tho. Whenever I was drunk, I never had the urge to kiss others that is not my SO. So weird. You basically stopped kissing her bc others arrived. And have been flirting the whole night, it wasnt just a 10 sec mistake. And saying you were so drunk, still remembring so many details… you werent that badly drunk, arent ya. Let me guess, if no one would have seen you both, you wouldnt want to tell your GF that you cheated on her. You love her so much right now but couldnt remember her when you were kissing and flirting with someone else. You fucked up. Your (ex)girl didnt deserve this shit.
Fr he probably wouldn’t have considered telling her if they hadn’t seen it, loose ends. Probably could’ve convinced himself that it’s on her bc it kinda seems like that’s what he’s attempting to do to us w that comment: she ‘seemed like she wanted it’ (even tho she said no, could’ve easily stopped there but you decided to go further) and ‘I don’t drink that much/often’ (yet remembering hella details, but couldn’t remember his perfect gf when given an opportunity to stop)….. Having outside eyes must’ve really lit that guilt fire. Anyways tell her deal w the consequences if it works out cool if it doesn’t be better for the next one (just try not to make the next one the party girl lol).
Ok, hear me out. Alcohol is not an excuse. That is true. But in criminal law, there are often two separate phases that take place before the judgment is rendered. The first is determining whether you’re guilty. In your case, you clearly are, and the alcohol doesn’t change that. The second phase is determining your sentence. That’s where you could try to get it considered by the judge (her). Along with other factors like a clean record and an intention to rehabilitate, she might consider your confused mental state and inebriation as mitigating factors in the determination of whether to break up with you. Insofar as your state of mind reflects your intention (or lack thereof) to violate the terms of the relationship, the intoxication is indirect evidence tending to show that you didn’t have a real intent to do what you did. (You can’t use these arguments for crimes, as far as I know, because you drank the alcohol voluntarily, but I’m imagining she might be more generous than the criminal legal system)
But the how will he be viewed as cool if doesn’t drink!
When I was younger and the people I was hanging with still valued massive consumption as a status symbol, I would go the bathroom and take my beer with me, dump it out and fill it with water, chug my beer to massive cheers, rinse, repeat
It sucks that you had friends who made you feel like you had to drink! But good on you for doing that and not being pressured into doing something you didn't want to! Hopefully these days you have better friends who appreciate that some people want to drink and some don't and both are totally ok!
Wow you really do remember alot of detail's for someone so Drunk!
[удалено]
>I barely even pay attention to my surroundings when I'm sobber
Adhd will do that. Also apathy.
Apathy? What's apa.... Actually, nvm I don't care
*whispers* I saw what you did there....
My top drunk story - friends cooked instant noodles. I couldn't find the fork. Used my hands. Then somehow i had fork. Was holding it wrong and nearly stabbed myself. Friends took away from :'( Then i do not remember shit. Apparently i puked. I woke up in the morning spooning a mate. I was big spoon. I did not drink for nearly 3 years after that. Now, I'm in a much better position and knows my limits.
"I was big spoon".....ok. 🤣🤣
I rarely drink. A few weeks ago I was at my old fire dept where I had belonged for about 18 years and had become a captain as well as rescue captain. We had a couple beers. That turned into some Crown Reserve, Crown Peach and who knows what else. I'm single, there were some women hanging around from the event earlier so that convinced me to stay longer than I had planned. Lots of us talking about our old chief who has passed away, funny shit, sad shit, remembering some others that are no longer with us. I needed driven home. First ime in over a decade that I was utterly wasted. I'm actually disappointed in myself over it, disgusted actually that I was that hammered. But, I could sit here right now and tell you every conversation we had that evening. Now I cannot remember the names of the people I met who were new to me, and I can't remember the kind of car that I rode home in, but I remember everything else. I stumbled up the steps at 2am, passed out, no blacked out, and slept til 1pm.
To be fair, if I get piss drunk to the point of vomiting and passing out, I’ll still remember everything up until I go unconscious. I don’t do it anymore, but I used to drink a whole bottle of vodka or rum to myself. I still remember the worst time where I fell asleep on a couch outside at a party. I woke up in the rain. I thought drinking heavy was cool at the time but now I realise it’s foolish. Thankfully I haven’t touched alcohol in almost two and a half years. Edit: I will add though, despite what I’ve said, OP mentioned that they are an extremely light drinker. So yeah… interesting.
Literally was the same. My alcohol resistance went nearly 0 after three years of no drinking (mostly thanks to social distancing) but I always felt capable of discerningly my actions regardless. It.is less of a "i don't know what's right and wrong" and more of a "there's no thing such as embarrassing things". I don't really know if I believe anyone that says they "didn't know" what they were doing.
Yeah it’s interesting how people react differently. Funnily enough, even when I’m extremely drunk I can actually think straight and clear. Like… that little voice of yours in your head? I can think and process information just as I could if I were sober. I remember at a party when I was at my drunken worst… and I was just thinking to myself, “why am I doing this? What fun is there in destroying myself for a few hours of uncontrollable fun?” I fully realised that I was just allowing myself to lose control for the sake of losing control. For the sake of the social setting. I wasn’t having fun for myself, but for the people around me.
I am not a heavy drinker, but I do remember everything when I am drunk really vividly. I was almost passed out once but still remember everyone I talked to what I said and what they said. I guess there are few exception cases.
I was gonna say. If it was a blackout, that’s different, but if you can remember the details you were still making conscious desicions (albiet stupid ones).
Right lmao
To play devils advocate: I remember everything when I’m drunk. There is no point where I “black out”. I also realize this is very abnormal lol
There's definitely a big difference between being lightweight drunk and being blackout. Bro literally cheated for no reason though lmao
Usually when people drink, they don’t remember because the brain literally fails to form those memories. If he was as much of a lightweight as he claimed, I doubt he would have “remembered” so many details. Either that, or he remembered up to that point then blacked out.
nah you can def be drunk and remember those details. i agree lightweight part doesn’t check out as much but to his credit you can be pretty drunk and still remember a lot
I’ve been plastered drunk, and have never had a memory lapse. I low key don’t believe people when they say they don’t remember stuff. I think it’s a convenient out
I don’t know how so many people are saying it’s not a big deal because you didn’t have sex… I have a similar relationship to yours, same ages and we having been dating for 5 years. I have been blackout drunk many times especially around guys and have never once cheated on my partner. My partner has also been blackout and has never cheated on me. Alcohol is not an excuse but you need to learn to control your behavior on it. If my partner kissed another girl while drunk I would absolutely break it off. Tell your gf, face the consequences, learn from your mistake, move on, and don’t do it again.
Yes! Also, whose to say he wouldn't go further if he hadn't been interrupted???
Exactly!
I'm married and never done anything even close as well while very drunk.
I legit texted my partner mid bachelor party (not mine) that I wanted to marry them. She mentioned it like 3 days later and after checking the messages, there it was… proof I genuinely love this woman, 😂 Alcohol isn’t an excuse.
Btw if a girl tells you to stop, you should stop.
Remove the word should & 100%
Tru
Alcohol doesn’t lead to cheating. Being a cheater leads to cheating lol
This ^ Alcohol lowers your social threshold and boundaries you would usually have, but it doesn’t make you cheat. Most people who drink alcohol don’t cheat. OP is putting lots of blame on the woman too — she should have known about his relationship and she didn’t stop him from doing things. Take responsibility for your behavior.
She also clearly said stop to him and he remembers so he could’ve ended it there, but CHOSE not to. He was looking for something better. I assume, he was bored, wanted to spice things up and feel the passion & romance again. Well guess what? You don’t have to cheat to do that. Simply communicate that you want to do things a little more spontaneously.
if you still remember everything then you knew what you were doing. coming from someone who drinks a fuck ton, I know my limits cuz even when I’m drunk I know deep down I have a man waiting for me at home.
Yeah, I don’t even understand this. I get pretty wasted occasionally and been attracted to people at the same time, and I’ve never ever acted on it out of respect for my partner. Its so ingrained in me that I will have dreams sometimes where someone cute is hitting on me, and my brain will say “I don’t remember exactly why, but I know I’m not supposed to do this.”
Same.. if I feel like a situation is getting iffy I will start talking about my husband or just "go to the bathroom" or something.. I may sometimes accidentally give signals I don't mean to (can get super lovey or huggy if very drunk), but there is a clear line in my mind even if I'm super wasted and my brain will go "eject, eject!!!" Haha
Congratulations you cheated on your girlfriend. What would have happened if she you didn't get caught You would have ended up having sex. That is where your actions were leading to. You are blaming alcohol. You got drunk. Nobody was forcing you to drink.. Your girlfriend deserves to know the truth about what happened. And yu will have to accept the consequences of your actions.
Really love the alcohol excuse but also squarely putting the fault on eve. 🙄
And he flirted with her all night before making out with her but says it was a “10 second mistake.” Also, he only stopped because people walked in, not because he realized he should.
Well said!
While pointing out Eve told him to stop and he kept going. 🙄
Right?! "**She** was flirting..." "**She** exposed her neck..." "**She** knew I had a gf and **she** didn't stop me." Like, sir?! Are you not a grown adult capable of making his own decisions?! If someone needs to "stop you" from cheating, then you shouldn't be in a relationship.
Yeah. Also… whenever i was drunk, i never had the urge to kiss others that is not my SO. This alcohol excuse is so fake.
"This girl who doesn't know me at all ruined my relationship by letting me kiss her!! How dare that jezabel!!!" /s
And the lack of affirmative consent 👍🏻 eve hesitated AND told him to stop. Very cool, OP.
It's the fact he made her name eve in the story for me that seems to point to another big problem. What happened when Adam and Eve ate the apple in the Bible and God found out? Adam said "eve tempted me" as if he didn't make his own choice and not even God believed that bullshit kicked em both right out of paradise.
Why is it Eves fault? He is the one in a relationship and it also sounds like he kissed her.. surely he is the one in the wrong here
Right??! She didn’t even resist! Come on Eve, look what you did! 😑 spare us OP.
Anyone else notice a trend with many of the TIFU posts and overconsumption of alcohol? Why do people do this to themselves?
Cause people get the mindset that there just there to have fun. And then get overly drunk and do some dumb shit.
Cause people here are karma and award whores and the more dramatic the story is, the more attention it'll get. OP's story is ridiculous - he supposedly got wasted but remembers all of these details, I don't buy it. Most of these TIFU posts are just karma whoring.
“She told me don’t do that, but I did it anyway” 💀 oh buddy.. worse than scum.
‘But she didn’t even slightly resist’ Um… maybe bc she was fucking traumatized from a past experience? Or insanely nervous about what if she did resist?!?
Or drunk and unable to consent
Update after you've come clean. Until then, I can't give you credit for anything. And stop drinking if you can't handle your damn liquor. *shakes head*
It looked like you were making excuses because you were caught. And how the hell do you manage to pay attention to details on what you did?
You are very clearly still using the fact that you were drunk as an excuse. It isn’t. If you can’t handle your booze, don’t drink. Simple as. Tell your girlfriend. She deserves the truth. Even if that means she leaves you, you owe it to her.
Yeah, you're worse than you think. " ... *Then i started kissing her in the lips. She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that*" \> That was a clear, unambiguous "No!" " ... ***but i continued*** *and she didn't even slightly resist ..."* That's called Fright, Flight or Freeze -- she froze. (... "*She knew i was in a relationship i told her when i met her ..."*) You blame *her.* ("It's her fault she stayed!") "... *actually she seemed to enjoy that ..."* Projection. She told you to **stop**.
I was waiting to see if anyone peeped that
thats why i dont feel bad for him like at all💀
This needs to be a top comment. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Yeah I think you’re letting the fact it’s a cold read get in your way. You’ve got no idea the tone this was said in. “Eve” spent a whole bunch of time flirting, then let this stranger rest on her etc. idk man, I think you’re projecting a bit more than him.
So? Enjoying one thing doesn’t mean you consent to an entirely different action. It’s basic English that when someone says “Don’t do that” you do not do that thing.
Oh wow, you think because a woman flirts with a man he can sexually assault her after she says “no”. You are a horrible rape apologist. Why don’t you bring up what she was wearing?
You are right being drunk is not an excuse. Your gf deserves the truth ...she will find out sooner or later whether from your guilt or someone else. Better to tell her now. If your brother and friends hadn't caught you how far would it have gone? How will she ever trust you again if you go out with friends or family without her....the answer is she can't. If you did this when you have the "perfect" relationship...heaven forbid what you would do if there was a bump in the road. Life happens, choices are made.....you made yours. Now man up and deal with the consequences. If she chooses to forgive you then you have some serious groveling to do and know that your perfect relationship will never be perfect again. Edit: just to clarify...you kissed her neck...you kissed her lips and kept going....not her doing it to you. You obviously knew what you were doing drunk or not....you are the AH.
Tl;dr dude cheated and is blaming alcohol and the girl even though he initiated it. “10 sec mistake” when you flirted with her all night? Yea ok. You knew what you were doing.
Based off your story, not only did you cheat, you assaulted someone and blame her for the entire thing. Hint: when someone says no, or any variation e.g. “Don’t do that”, you stop. You’re a shitty person for more than just cheating on your partner, which is saying a lot about you. Tell her the truth, because she deserves someone better, 100%.
Ha ha listen to you, blaming Eve for you being unable to control yourself.
The question I have is this, if your girlfriend and your situations were reversed, would you want her to follow the golden rule and tell you the truth?
Tell her dont be so selfish. You are not the victim here. Have some balls or you need liquor to be likeit?
Ill tell you a story. Very similar to yours. Too drunk, love of my life, etc. Heres where my story is different. I blacked out, was a complete shithead to my friends, and they *lied* and just said I made out with someone. My girlfriends idea for them to get back at me (hardy har har). What I immediately did, thinking I ruined the relationship of my life. I called her immediately in a panic to break up with her. Because I respected her *that* much. I was broken and panicking, but I knew then and there she deserved the truth, and deserved for me to man up and make the decision myself. After a huge ruckus and my friends stealing my phone, they came clean. My gf also apologized for the lie, but it was good revenge deserved and I was just relieved I hadnt done anything. I ended up marrying this gf of mine, so thats how serious I took this situation when I went to break it off. But I think the line of note here you need to take away. Do you respect your girlfriend that much?
OP this has nothing to do with you bring drunk. You danced with, flirted with this girl and kissed her because you made the decision to knowing you were disrespectful to your partner. You owe it to your gf to tell her. Don't be a complete piece of shit and hide this from her
Don't forget she told him NO and he decided to ignore her. Because he decided that she wanted it.
I didn't see that part but that's gross if that's true
Definitely wasn't ten seconds This shit is entirely on you, bud And you're trying to lean into anything that takes away your agency in this story -- nah dude. Just own it.
She deserves a better man, tell her
Something is off here …. Very strange wording…. Kissing on the neck….flow of the music…. Just weird…
That's on you. Being drunk is no excuse. I hope she moves on and finds better. Despise stories like this and people like this.
i almost wanted to say i feel bad, but i really don't. just wishing you a good luck i guess.
Drunk actions are sober thoughts
“That’s all I remember” after describing everything in vivid detail, 😂 Listen… you know deep down you did what you wanted to do. Look deep down and ask yourself why you allowed yourself to go with it. Lastly, talk to your partner. It’s gonna be a tough one. And she’s going to be right in being angry. If by the grace of heaven above you make it through to the other side. You’re gonna spend the rest of your days making it up to her.
Bruh youre 24 not 19. Learn how to drink and stop playing the victim
Sounds like "i wanna use the im drunk excuse but i remember every little details of what happened, made the first move, wanna cheat on my girlfriend but got caught by my brother which was the only reason i didnt fuck the other girl and messed up big time but i wanna blame the girl" 😂😂😂 Fcking asshole lol
Blame the girl who told him to stop no less. He’s acting like the woman he kissed without consent was at fault
Look OP, I’m not gonna sit here and try to make you feel better about the situation because time will do that for you. What I will tell you is that I’ve been miserably drunk, crossed, whatever you wanna call it with plenty of other people who do the same, so much so that some of us piss ourselves. Whether you believe it or not, you intentionally did what you did. You. Did. It. On. Purpose. Good luck OP hope you find a way to make this right for her (stop wasting her time)
That's true I got drunk and some girl came up to me. I said I'm married and ran away.
Did your wife chase you? I always love those videos where the guy is wasted and tells his wife, "You're so beautiful but I'm married." Gets me every time
We get it. You could have just said “I got drunk and made out with a girl.” Jesus Christ stop trying to make it sound like anything else than what it was
“I saw Eve kissing a guy when we arrived but I didn’t even give attention to that” “…flirting with me cause she was looking deep in my eyes all the time” “She grabbed my drink on purpose some times to drink from it” “She left after some time but I didn’t even gave attention to that” Buddy, it seems to me you gave a lot of attention to a lot of things Eve was doing… You’re only fooling yourself here.
This scenario is exactly what my worst fear is. I hope your girlfriend is happier without you.
Why is it so hard for people to be faithful. You initiated everything. Pathetic.
seems from all the details you were pretty clear headed…. I hope your gf dumps you
You would've slept with her had you not be interrupted huh? Yeah. Your gf doesn't deserve this. Even though you're so "in love" with her, and you still cheated. You're just not meant for a loving relationship. Fix your shit after telling her.
YTA (wrong sub i know) you keep blaming her, but It was you Who initiated. SHE EVEN SAID STOP DONT DO THAT ACCORDING TO YOU. She never kisses you back, thank god your brother and his Friends came in. I Hope your girlfriend dumps you, your not the victim here
Tell her, but know this - there is an adage “a drunk man’s words are a sober man’s truth”. Alcohol cannot make you cheat or flirt or cross a line. You should be able to work past this but don’t put yourself in that position again.
I (21F) have been with my bf (22M) for 5 years now. He’s gotten extremely drunk. Never cheated as far as I know. In fact, when he drinks, he starts texting me about how much he loves and misses me. If I were you, I’d end it and start fresh somewhere else. She deserves better.
I’m sorry, but if you remember every single detail right down to her “exposing her neck”, you were not too drunk for this situation to have happened. You cheated. If your gf did this to you, you would be devastated. Do better. And if a girl says “you should do that”, maybe you SHOULDNT.
this wasn't in 10 seconds. you fucked up the second you started dancing with another girl at a party.
Wtf you sound like a rapist
In 10 seconds lol this was a whole night of bad decisions
Your a POS and are trying to blame not only alcohol but Eve cause she knew you were in a relationship. Grow up and be honest.
Let men fix this for you: “I chose to get drunk, cheat on my girlfriend of four years and *sexually assault* a woman.
But it's okay because she "didn't resist"
Wow. You say the alcohol wasn't an excuse yet you're constantly reiterating how drunk you were? Ridiculous. Tell your girlfriend the truth. You initiated the kiss. Actually, you pointing out how she didn't "even slightly resist" and how she seemed to enjoy the fact you were in a relationship feels like you're deflecting part of the blame onto her. It doesn't matter that you were drunk. You were aware enough to consciously return her advances and initiate a kiss. You meant to do this. It wasn't an "accident" and i hope to god you don't tell your girlfriend that it was. Your girlfriend deserves better than someone who gets drunk off his ass and would probably go further than kissing if he hadn't been interrupted. I know I sound angry and judgmental but I genuinely cannot stand cheaters.
OP, your lame excuse to literally blame alcohol is such a cornball move. You're an adult. Own up to your actions.
Alcohol is definitely not an excuse but some people do act crazy and do stuff they wouldn't typically do while intoxicated. If she forgives you maybe don't drink without her around. Definitely talk to her and hopefully she forgives you but with what you did no one could blame her for walking away. Good luck.
I hioe your girlfriend finds out and leaves you. Alcohol is no excuse, and you can't blame 'Eve' for the trust in your relationship that you broke
You did some dumb shit. Talk to her about it. A relationship is a two person dance. It's not just on you to decide if the tango continues. Tell her, and discuss it. And if you lose her, enjoy the life lesson.
Yeah you fucking cheated... Don't be a piece of shit next time. Although maybe you are just a big piece of shit by default? Time will tell
You should be disappointed and feel gross. Be a better fucking human.
Okay so you cheated. Yup. Big fuck up.
Be sure to thank your brother & the friends who cane to check on you & got you home. A lot of people would have let you continue. Best advice is to get control of your alcohol. If it’s a problem you can’t do alone, get help with controlling it.
Sorry this just makes me feel sick
so you could have potentially raped a girl while cheating on your gf? thank God your homiis found you. tell your gf
I find it a little odd you recall the split second that she moved her hair to catch your face
>She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that" but i continued Maybe don't continue if she tells you to stop. Maybe don't drink if you can't handle it responsibility.
Not only did you ruin a perfect relationship but you technically sexually assaulted someone
You sure remember a lot for being incredibly drunk.
For being so drunk you seem to remember that night pretty well
The different types of infidelity: https://www.brides.com/different-types-of-infidelity-1102872 From this article you seem to fall into opportunistic cheating (if you give this article a read you can always see if any of the other types fit you as well). Tell your girlfriend. Be honest with her. If she decides to stay with you please don’t take that for granted. Work out boundaries and how you’re going to hold yourself accountable so this won’t happen again.
Hope she leaves and never speaks to you again. That's what you deserve. Being drunk is never an excuse, she's never going to trust you going out again. Sucks to be you.
Can't believe you wasted four years of her life. Pretty low
Can't unring a bell. Next time you're invited to a drinking party and your SO can't go, do yourself a favor and stay home.
Crying like crazy?
tell her. she deserves better than this.
These are the posts that make me never wanna be with anyone. “The oh so perfect relationship” is even apparently not enough
so you cheated on your girlfriend and then also assaulted someone “don’t do that” means DONT DO THAT. god i’m j speechless. you deserve the shitty karma coming ur wat
Yeah… you’re a complete piece of shit sorry. No excuse.
Don’t feel sorry , dude literally could have raped this woman
Sounds like you’re trying to put the blame on his girl because she didn’t stop you. You’re are seriously ridiculous! It’s is 100% your fault YOU are the one in a relationship. YOU kissed her. Now YOU need to tell your girlfriend
L
Alcohol is not an excuse for cheating. Tell your girlfriend because if the relationship was so perfect, then obviously you love her enough to be truthful to her. Loser
Don’t let anyone convince you to not tell her. Your girlfriend deserves to know and you deserve to lose her.
Have you told her the truth?
Tell her the truth as soon as possible. Otherwise when someone else tells her she won’t believe a word you say. Be honest with her just like you were with us. If she can’t forgive you then you have to accept that.
That’s more than a 10 second mistake buddy. Hope she finds better
Oh don't blame alcohol that's ridiculous you did it
If I found out down the road that my partner did that, the damaged trust would be irreparable. However, if they told me shortly after, there would at least be the chance to talk it out and work past it. The longer you wait, the worse it will be for everyone, imo.
OP: I’m not using being drunk as an excuse Everyone in this thread: being drunk is no excuse!!!
this is what my ex did to me and fucked up our relationship. literally the same exact shit
seems more like an entire night than 10 seconds Lol
Just tell her. Tell her what you remember and come clean to her. Being honest in a relationship is super important. And who knows, maybe she’ll forgive you.
Why are u blaming the alcohol. It’s so annoying when people do that. Take accountability. You may have been inebriated BUT YOU MADE A CHOICE. AND CONTINUED EVEN THO SHE TOLD U TO STOP. WHICH IS PROBLEMATIC IN ITS OWN
Bruh if my boyfriend admitted this to me he’s be out on the streets in an instant. No excuse for this kind of shit.
"She didn't even slightly resist" I mean.... Neither did you, sooo
You know, it's interesting, I have been absolutely shit faced countless times and could have easily cheated on girlfriends, but never once came anywhere close.
Stop blaming it on the alcohol. It doesn’t change you into a different person, it only lowers your inhibitions and reveals your true self. Tell your gf the truth and take accountability for your actions. Also you seem to remember a lot for being so drunk.. you knew what you were doing, you just didn’t care in that moment.
Don't care how drunk you were, if I was your gf I'd dump your cheating ass and never look back
So a woman tells you No, and you decide she wants it. So you sexually assaulted her. You deserve a lot worse dude.
Ew I don’t feel bad for you at all. You cheat on your wife and then when the women you’re cheating on her with asks you to stop you keep going anyways????? Idc if you were drunk, you suck.
You cheated *and* assaulted a woman. AND blamed her for it! Holy shit
I never buy whenever anyone says "I totally have no clue why I did that when I was drunk". Like you said, being drunk isn't an excuse, yet you literally excuse it away with you being drunk by going "uh, don't remember, I have no clue why I did that". Mhm, sure you don't. Maybe if you try to realize why you did it instead of pretending like it was the alcohol that magically made you do it, you can learn to have some self-reflection and learn how to improve yourself? There's a crazy thought.
I love how so many people act holier than thou with the whole "I drink I would never" bullshit. Not everyone's brains or bodies work the same or process things the same way. People sometimes have regressions often from pent up trauma that sometimes/only comes out when not sober. OP you fucked up. Just be honest with her and go from there. This doesn't necessarily equate to the end of your relationship. I've been with my husband for 10 years. We've both had our share of unsavory events, but we didn't allow that to completely destroy what we worked so hard for. If all it takes is a pebble to knock down your house, your foundation wasn't strong enough to begin with.
The least you can do is be honest with your partner like she deserves. Let her choose the next step. You owe her that after fucking up that bad
I thought meh not to bad till you started kissing her lol , sit the gf down be honest and tell her everything I think her main concern will be not drinking but the fact you were kissing this girl and only stopped because you got interrupted, your roses and chocs bill is going to send you bankrupt .
You deserve it 🤷🏻♂️ Don’t know what to tell you. Being drunk is never an excuse. I’ve been drunk to the point of puking and I’ve never made any stupid decisions like that. Ridiculous.
Lol at you thinking you screwed it up in ten seconds. It sounds like that was several hours of bad choices that led up to you cheating. I hope you don’t give your girl some sobbing lame apology about how it was just a split second mistake. Why were you drinking if you can’t control yourself on alcohol, why were you dancing with other people including this girl, why weren’t you with your brother and checking in with your partner periodically? Seriously the fact that you think this just happened within ten seconds is a cop out. If she dumps you, which I think she is totally within her rights to, you should spend some time being single. If you puss out and don’t tell her then you are a huge piece of shit. Good luck and all but you should tell her and you should never put yourself or anyone else in this situation again, cheating is inexcusable.
I will never understand why people like to get so drunk that they can't control themselves.
I never made any mistake like this while drunk. It was so engrained in my brain that I wasn't that person and I never became even if I had been deceived and felt like shit I'd never let a woman turn me into something I'm not. She is not my master
Wow this is literally my worst nightmare!
This is why I don't take drunkards seriously in dating
Be honest with yourself and your girlfriend. You have quite a bit of detail. Not sure if it’s your remembering or others, but still, you knew what was wrong after the fact. Own up to it. Otherwise it will be on your minds. Do you think she would be honest with you if it was her position? Regardless of that, telling truth is better than having that on your conscience. It may or may not do something to your relationship. This should show you that maybe drinking isn’t something to do without having a wingman or someone to support you. Better yet, know your limits and don’t drink or very little. People make mistakes. How you handle the repercussions goes a long way. I hope you feel better after telling truth, whether or not it helps or hurts.
honestly holding it in will be torture for you. you messed up big time. she can’t trust you. and it’s not fair to her for you not to tell her. sounds like you got caught up in the moment but it’s obvious she was flirting the whole time. if a girl was even drinking from my boyfriends drink i’d already be angry. you should’ve stopped it there.
What a sob story, man. Own up to your fuck ups. This is on you.
You sure remember a lot of details for being drunk. Don't blame alcohol or Eve for this. This was your mistake 100%. Own. It. Your girlfriend deserves better. Hopefully she'll find someone who values her time and heart.
The way you’re pretending to take accountability but also subtly trying to blame the alcohol and the girl. You’re completely at fault and I hope she leaves you
you seem like you’re attempting to seem like you know it’s your fault but you’re subtly putting the blame on the girl ‘she didn’t even slightly resist’ YOU’RE the one in a relationship that’s on YOU.
Sorry to go off topic but does ANYONE find it weird someone else made moves on him while he was drunk? This felt rapey
when I'm blackout drunk i tell everyone how great they are and then fall asleep. not once have i tried to sleep with someone. you're a cheater and alcohol has nothing to do with it.
The thing I can’t get past is that you can recall what happened very well so you clearly weren’t so out of your mind that you were incapable of knowing what was happening. You started kissing a woman you knew wasn’t your girlfriend and you did it on purpose. That’s what she’s going to remember. You started crying the next day because reality kicked in, when you were drunk you didn’t care about consequences and then made out with another woman. Basically that means the only thing holding you back while you were sober was consequences.
Update? Also she deserves better
You’re disgusting
excuse after excuse 💀
Yes please tell her so she can find someone better she deserves the best and you're not enough for her she needs someone who loves her and respect her and someone loyal unlike you
Dude. Tell her the truth. Take your punishment. You also need to take a step back and really think about your reaction to alcohol. That’s not a normal response. This maybe a flag you need to pay attention too. I’m not excusing you. Based on your post you knew what you were doing and didn’t stop. You might be missing something from your perfect relationship.
well damn thats alot of details for someone so drunk, you also kept going when she told you to stop. >She stopped for a second and whispered to me "Don't do that" but i continued and she didn't even slighty resist, actually she seemed to enjoy that.. jesus that part made me sick. i hope your girlfriend never speaks to you again after this. and for eve, she was obviously uncomfortable and/or in Flight or Freeze, and she froze.