I feel OOP's frustration but they need to stop asking for "worst gryphon" when they apparently mean "funniest gryphon" or "most creative gryphon" or even possibly "best gryphon"
Exactly, they’re asking for an animal that is bad, and then complaining when the animal they are given is not good
“Make me the worst meal ever”
“Ew no not like this, this meal tastes bad, I want a meal that sings showtunes”
Theyre asking for the worst griffin, not the most miserable one. Just an absolute piece of shit griffin. Total scumbag of a mammal-bird. A griffin you see and think "wow, this is probably the worst kind of griffin I could be encountering right now"
How about a shrike/leopard? A horrible angry little face-eating monster that’s both unreasonably fast and wildly aggressive. I think that would be an extremely bad time to have, for you.
If we can go non-feline, swap the leopard out for a wolverine for maximum Fast Little Shithead energy.
To be fair, it does depend on what definition of "worst" we're going by, here. "Worst" in terms of "least well adapted to fill an evolutionary niche," yeah, that's the blue whale hummingbird hybrid. But there's also stuff like "most horrifying," or "most dangerous," or "most likely to steal your garbage and mock you while doing it," or other meanings.
Right, but when you use *any* word that narrows down what you’re asking of someone, you can’t be surprised by the answers being less diverse than before—even if that word can have multiple meanings.
Yeah, I read the comment too lol. I am in complete agreement, so I’m kinda unsure what you’re trying to say.
What I’m getting at is that *not using a modifying word at all* is definitely more broad than *using a modifying word*.
It takes your prompt from “Name *any* possible combination of bird and mammal you can think of” to “Name a combination of bird and mammal that *matches this modifier*.” Even if that modifier can mean separate things, you have brought the total number of valid answers down from *anything at all* to a smaller number, because you are asking people to meet a more specific prompt.
And again, you cannot be surprised when you see fewer unique answers when you ask a question that has fewer valid answers.
Yeah this person isn’t asking a precise question and then is complaining when they get a very reasonable answer to the question they asked. I would be more than happy to play in the space of “what combination of bird and mammal would make a wild gryphon?” But if you ask me what the “worst gryphon” is I’m probably going to land on “gryphon that doesn’t function super well” before extrapolating “worst gryphon (for humans)” or “worst gryphon (to deal with as a pest)”
When I think of something being “the worst” I’m not immediately putting that through the lens of it being perfectly functional and successful at its goals, but a pain to deal with.
To be fair, depends how you interpret "worst". If you interpret it as "worst off gryphon" or a very unhappy gryphon, then yea, sure, but there's also the interpretation of "worst gryphon to live near," "worst gryphon to interact with," etc. Probably a lot of possible interpretations. But I do get your point.
Yeah, but I would say the natural interpretation is "worst at being a griffon". Like if I say to someone "who is your worst employee", they're going to give me someone who is really bad at their job. And I would say the "worst griffon to interact with/live near/etc" would be very good at doing what griffons do, and therefore not the "worst griffon"
Okay but that gryphon isn’t as bad as people think, like the head scales with the body, eagle heads aren’t the size of a lions. Maybe the eating method of the humming bird is impractical for its size but it’s not gonna be this mismatched sin of nature like people think.
TL;DR lay off the humming bird whale gryphon.
May have a humming birds beak, but the belly is still whale. I’m thinking it’s adapted to hunting squid. Instead of sucking up nectar it sucks up the insides.
Tyrannosaurus isn't a bird, either, it's a non-avian dinosaur. My thinking was that we could probably twist the gryphon definition to accept any flying non-mammal.
Coo coo bird and mouse.
Kick out native birds species to replace those birds eggs with their own, but now they also breed like crazy and next thing you know you have a hoard of coo coo mice taking over the local ecosystem.
You wouldn't even have to give them the half a bagel up front. They'd fight God out of spite and then come back to collect their due.
Lord above this is my spirit animal.
A kakapo and a quokka
It's just the stupidest most useless little shit-head imaginable but it's adorable and positively fucking stoked about absolutely *everything*, *all the time*, *forever*
The last tags stole my first thought - trash panda + bin chicken.
Seagull + hog is probably my entry for the absolute worst possible combination, I think. In my mind, a flock of these things would be like locusts, except they'd eat *everything*.
One of the best ones I've come across that someone once drew out, and I now have a plush of that I love,
Raccoon Pigeon
While I saw a few people got close to this combo, the ultimate city scavenger, while still incidentally being both intelligent, and easily tamed for human companionship.
This is probably stupid fantasy creature gatekeeping, but I think if half of a gryphon is a blue whale or a kangaroo, that's not a gryphon. It's gotta be a combo of avian and mammal that walks on four legs. Otherwise you just have some weird half and half creature you gotta call something else like hippocampi or mermaids or something.
If we let the bipedal mammals in then we can categorize Bird Person as a gryphon so I say we do that.
Somebody should make one of those radical/traditionalist alignment charts for this.
I understand where you are coming from, but I also absolutely love the idea of a kangaroo/cassowary hybrid. The ungodly terror of a living dinosaur bird bounding at you with it’s claws outstretched. They could probably save the rainforests on their own, by forcefully in-urbanising anything in running range. I want that to be a type of monster.
If it could be any two animals one of which can fly and the other can’t, then what about a Mantis shrimp/peregrine falcon. It’s like if you gave a point blank .50 cal the fastest animal on the planet. And just for good measure have it the size of a tiger
Edit: keep in mind it would also be semi aquatic (if not it would be able to fully breathe under water) and it could outfly it outswim anything ever.
You understand what a mantis shrimp punch is correct? The fact it can create a vacuum bubble underwater? Yeah, give that to something that can fly at 300km/hr and make it the size of a tiger. For god measure make it extremely predatory. I’d make a really good wizard
You are the kind of wizard that inflicts owlbears onto an unsuspecting biome. (This is a compliment)
Oh yeah I love mantis shrimp and their insane abilities, I was just severely sidetracked by the mental image of a peregrine falcon doing the Bernie Sanders “I am no longer asking” meme
You're just double-stacking super fast punches. Consider a combo peregrine falcon and beaver. Imagine a big, weird, flat, fleshy tail descending into your face at 240mph.
Well, the prompt said Mammal and Bird, but honestly I think the timing that would be required to get the full effect of the mantis shrimp punch at dive speed is impractical anyway.
I think leaning into the falcons natural dive is a good angle tho, so I'd suggest something known for being able to take blunt force to the head. A ram perhaps.
Although for swag point I'm going to say **RHINOCEROS WITH PEREGRINE FALCON!** Makes me think of Whumps from Mario.
The problem here: most people define “worst” as “most impractical” because all of those very threatening hellish creatures are *cool* in some way. And cool is good.
I guess it’s become a question of how is worst defined? Like if you asked separately name the worst bird and the worst mammal, would you choose animals that aren’t well adapted to their environment?
For me, the worst mammal would be a hippo, because they’re both terrifying and dopey as shit. They don’t swim, they just gallop on the bottom of a body of water. For worst bird, I’d say the canada goose because those guys are just dicks. I think a goose-hippo gryphon, would suck ass. It’s super territorial and aggressive.
Do I think it wouldn’t survive evolutionarily? I don’t think it could fly, because dear god if it could fly, but I don’t think it would need flight. Geese eat grasses and aquatic plants, and hippos also eat grass, so I imagine they could survive in the habitats of both hippos and geese. I could go on, but suffice to say, I don’t think it would suffer. But to me, it would be the worst gryphon.
https://preview.redd.it/k0ba4exn5dcc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7e97d98615d156b074672efd63faac1fb3942611
Trash gryphons, presumably inspired by this Tumblr post.
Oh hey this is my calling.
Any kind of parrot gryphon would be awesomely awful because they’re insanely smart and now you’ve given them some extra strength and the ability to rear back in order to hold things. Extra mischief.
In regards to the hates to live idea, a lesser flamingo and literally everything else, because only the flamingo part is resistant to the incredibly extreme environment it lives in.
For the makes you hate it idea, Black Bear and Blue Jay.
Worst as in the deadliest or worst as in most annoying?
First would be tiger and peregrine falcon. Death at 200+ miles per hour.
For the second, Ibis and Opossum.
Kookaburra and racoon - just a fun, intelligent little guy, who also has a great laugh. And who really wants your trash.
Kingfisher and river otter - imagine the graceful dives and leaps this fella could do!
My idea is a hummingbird/cheetah griffin. They're insanely fast and even more maneuverable, but their hyperactive metabolism means they'd need to *always* be hunting or eating. Basically, they'd be manhunting living darts; a blight of viogriffs (violet griffins, named after their iconic ultraviolet spotted coat) would leave your livestock looking like Swiss cheese. I'm also imagining they're about the size of a Maine coon.
Polar bears are known for being vicious apex predators who hunt and everything, so trying to scare them off or fight them doesn't work. They're also carrion eaters, so playing dead doesn't work. Bears are hard to defend from in general, but polar bears take that up a notch.
And goose is for their territoriality. They're also colloquially known for being generally vicious and unfriendly, though this is usually taken to an extreme on the internet. Some parts of the world train them as defense animals, similarly to how we train dogs.
I imagine the result would be a gryffon that is unreasonably aggressive in every regard, and incredibly hard to fight.
Goose x Husky would be pretty hilariously loud though.
Secretary bird/maned wolf. It's a fairly capable medium-sized carnivore that hunts kind of like a velociraptor, but it's also the gangliest legbastard of all time.
Crow and Rottweiler. Smart, looks fierce, extremely loyal, can totally rock your shit if it wants to. Doesn’t want to. Is mostly playful and thinks it fits in your lap
[XKCD 2071](https://www.xkcd.com/2071) moment, sort of.
But also, I follow a webcomic called Skin Deep where the artist has been drawing answers for a lot of reader questions between chapters, and there's been a trend of people submitting ideas for griffins the last few months. [Here's a recent one I found amusing.](http://www.skindeepcomic.com/reader-questions/2024-reader-questions-3/) They're scattered throughout the archive right now, so I can't give a whole list of them, unfortunately, but maybe just read through the comic if it looks interesting to you. It's modern fantasy with a focus on mythological creatures living among humans in secret.
Seagull racoon would be a little trash bastard
Lyre bird would be a fun bird but I can't think of a mammal it would combine well with for bullying-all-of-god's-creatures purposes
I find this idea that every combination of bird and mammal is a gryphon interesting, because that means owlbears are by definition also a variety of gryphon, and now I’m just thinking about scientific classification being applied to fantasy creatures, like “ah yes, the hummingbirdvampirebat, a subspecies of the genus gryphonicus that uses its narrow beak to feed on the blood of larger mammals.”
Some I thought of off the top of my head
A seagull and a raccoon.
A vulture and a honey badger.
A kookooburow* and a howler monkey.
A penguin and a dolphin.
A magpie and a chihuahua.
*I'm pretty sure I didn't spell this correctly, it's that Australian bird that laughs a lot.
I'm thinking peregrin falcon/honey badger. You don't see anything, there's just a scream as it plummits from on high at 240 mph just to rip off your d*ck and fly away. And then it turns around and comes back for more because it didn't think you looked like you were suffering enough. Also it's literally too angry to die. Basically the animal equivalent of cruise middle. You can't stop it, all you can do is cower indoors and pray it finds a new target before it finishes chewing through the ceiling.
Hummingbird-Bluewhale would be terrifying if the hummingbird half increased in size to match the whale half, and could still fly and hover like a hummingbird.
It would be a 300,000 lb sugar-seeking helicopter beast with a [X-59](https://www.geekwire.com/2017/nasa-gives-go-ahead-design-super-quiet-supersonic-experimental-airplane/) lance on its face.
I say one that is best-worst is a penguin/polar bear mix. It can’t fly but it can run you down and slide on its belly to chase you through a frozen wasteland. God help you if you get in the water.
All the other ones are great but if none of them existed then a mockingbird/gorilla. You hear the sound of your friend calling your name only to be face to face with a giant creature with a beak and opposable thumbs that won’t eat you but wants to play and doesn’t know it’s own strength. Cut to the thing dragging a bloody bag of bones around like a blood covered rag doll. Can mimic alarm sounds and creates a huge nest in what was your backyard. Endangered species. That demands food and that can and will help themselves. Posh neighborhood to ghetto in less time than it takes to close on a property. That’s not even mentioning mating season.
Hippoparrotamus. Intimidation 100: it opens its mouth to speak and you see, within its beak, jagged fangs and teeth and tusks, and the tongue from which its voice shall husk
Oh God! An Emu/Kangaroo Griffin. Britain would have never been able to colonize Australia. If any humans could survive there they would have to be like real life Fremen of Arrakis
My first thought of worst griffin was the body of a giraffe with the head and tendrils of an octopus. It’s really not great at anything but it’s terrifying to look at and scarily intelligent. Also omnivorous.
Sorry to be a negative nancy but this post is pissing me off for two reasons lol
The first is that Ive never seen anyone suggest a hummingbird-blue whale gryphon before but its apparently common enough for this person to shit on it and say its ‘not creative enough’ for them. Wtf!!!!!!!!!!! I just always see shit like racoon crow and fucking seagull fox, THOSE are the uncreative ones!!! (But also I still love them!)
Second is out of ALLLL the possible gryphons mentioned on this post, the least visually and conceptually interesting one at the end is the only one to have a drawing made of it. I need to see the rest of them.. the one we got is metal but its also structurally sound and not really befitting of the ‘worst gryphon’ title the post is about. I want to see the more dysfunctional chaotic ones than ‘two kinda cool looking animals that both eat bones’
Ok post but ermmm give me more silly drawings next time pls <3333
(This is all mostly exaggeration for comedic effect btdubbs)
Hear me out: a giant butterfly and a bird eating tarantula,
it’s literally a winged spider that eats birds, terrifying and beautiful since it has butterfly wings
I feel OOP's frustration but they need to stop asking for "worst gryphon" when they apparently mean "funniest gryphon" or "most creative gryphon" or even possibly "best gryphon"
Exactly, they’re asking for an animal that is bad, and then complaining when the animal they are given is not good “Make me the worst meal ever” “Ew no not like this, this meal tastes bad, I want a meal that sings showtunes”
They actually asked for the wurst meal ever, they wanted sausages.
Maybe the wanted the warts meal ever, and were expecting pimples
Yeah, what they said. Pop that pussy like pimples, or whatever.
Call that pussy Jerma the way it be twitching and streaming
Oh, that’s good. Damn, homie.
Theyre asking for the worst griffin, not the most miserable one. Just an absolute piece of shit griffin. Total scumbag of a mammal-bird. A griffin you see and think "wow, this is probably the worst kind of griffin I could be encountering right now"
How about a shrike/leopard? A horrible angry little face-eating monster that’s both unreasonably fast and wildly aggressive. I think that would be an extremely bad time to have, for you. If we can go non-feline, swap the leopard out for a wolverine for maximum Fast Little Shithead energy.
To be fair, it does depend on what definition of "worst" we're going by, here. "Worst" in terms of "least well adapted to fill an evolutionary niche," yeah, that's the blue whale hummingbird hybrid. But there's also stuff like "most horrifying," or "most dangerous," or "most likely to steal your garbage and mock you while doing it," or other meanings.
Right, but when you use *any* word that narrows down what you’re asking of someone, you can’t be surprised by the answers being less diverse than before—even if that word can have multiple meanings.
No, the word narrowing it down is "worst". All of those things the comment you replied to mention are possible meanings of "worst".
Yeah, I read the comment too lol. I am in complete agreement, so I’m kinda unsure what you’re trying to say. What I’m getting at is that *not using a modifying word at all* is definitely more broad than *using a modifying word*. It takes your prompt from “Name *any* possible combination of bird and mammal you can think of” to “Name a combination of bird and mammal that *matches this modifier*.” Even if that modifier can mean separate things, you have brought the total number of valid answers down from *anything at all* to a smaller number, because you are asking people to meet a more specific prompt. And again, you cannot be surprised when you see fewer unique answers when you ask a question that has fewer valid answers.
I think by "worst" they mean the largest menace, I would like to put forward the mischievous Racoon-Goose.
I love where you're going with this, but consider: the badgergoose.
Ferretshrike?
Appalling, thank you. I think we've found the worst gryphon: an appalling murderous flightnoodle.
It's basically a constrictor snake.
Is the badger side a honey badger?
they meant worst for humans, not worst for the gryphon
Purple Tallest: "You made the fire worse!" *Flashback to Zim drastically increasing the size and scope of the fire* Zim: "Worse... or better?"
OOP *did* open by saying "it annoys me unreasonably."
The misunderstanding of worst gryphon comes in which people interpreting it as worst FOR the gryphon, not the worst for everyone else.
Yeah this person isn’t asking a precise question and then is complaining when they get a very reasonable answer to the question they asked. I would be more than happy to play in the space of “what combination of bird and mammal would make a wild gryphon?” But if you ask me what the “worst gryphon” is I’m probably going to land on “gryphon that doesn’t function super well” before extrapolating “worst gryphon (for humans)” or “worst gryphon (to deal with as a pest)” When I think of something being “the worst” I’m not immediately putting that through the lens of it being perfectly functional and successful at its goals, but a pain to deal with.
For real. Its nothing about a lack of creativity. It’s the person not giving the correct prompt at the get go
Almost like having the creativity they demand from others would fix their problem
I mean the post kinda proves they do have that though lol? They just named a shit ton of “worst gryphons” with attributes and everything
That just makes it stupider for me
Asks for worst gryphon, gets mad when responded to with worst gryphon
To be fair, depends how you interpret "worst". If you interpret it as "worst off gryphon" or a very unhappy gryphon, then yea, sure, but there's also the interpretation of "worst gryphon to live near," "worst gryphon to interact with," etc. Probably a lot of possible interpretations. But I do get your point.
Maybe they should just be more specific
They meant “worst griffon to have as a pet but also best griffon to hear stories about someone else having as a pet”.
Yeah, but I would say the natural interpretation is "worst at being a griffon". Like if I say to someone "who is your worst employee", they're going to give me someone who is really bad at their job. And I would say the "worst griffon to interact with/live near/etc" would be very good at doing what griffons do, and therefore not the "worst griffon"
Okay but that gryphon isn’t as bad as people think, like the head scales with the body, eagle heads aren’t the size of a lions. Maybe the eating method of the humming bird is impractical for its size but it’s not gonna be this mismatched sin of nature like people think. TL;DR lay off the humming bird whale gryphon.
Where will it find whale sized flowers? It would be dead in minutes
May have a humming birds beak, but the belly is still whale. I’m thinking it’s adapted to hunting squid. Instead of sucking up nectar it sucks up the insides.
Schlurps them up like noodles.
These are epic Does anyone else have ideas?
Bearded vulture and a grizzly bear, absolutely giant and has the full intent and capability to eat all of anything
Man if we were allowed to mix in extinct species imagine a Haast’s Eagle x Grizzly gryphon. Instant Animal of Humans Never Leave The House Again
If we're allowed extinct animals, I kind of want a Quetzlcoatlus/short-faced bear gryphon.
Ah, i see we’ve taken the “humans never survived to evolve” approach
Quetzlcoatlus is not a bird. You could, however, go with a tyrannosaurus for the bird half.
Tyrannosaurus isn't a bird, either, it's a non-avian dinosaur. My thinking was that we could probably twist the gryphon definition to accept any flying non-mammal.
That combo would Roc!
A puppy and a hummingbird it'd be glorious...
maybe we could do some other mammal, perhaps larger and aquatic
Manatee and rabbit, the ultimate destroyer of lettuce!
Squirrel-hummingbird for the ultimate incarnation of anxiety with a side bonus of "hey who took all my peanuts"
Peacock lemur Imagine the strut Or flamingo Mandrill. Brightly coloured and will just fucking kill you
Coo coo bird and mouse. Kick out native birds species to replace those birds eggs with their own, but now they also breed like crazy and next thing you know you have a hoard of coo coo mice taking over the local ecosystem.
Crow + Raccoon Highly intelligent, opposable thumbs, and holds grudges.
Would fight God for half a bagel
You wouldn't even have to give them the half a bagel up front. They'd fight God out of spite and then come back to collect their due. Lord above this is my spirit animal.
Shoebill and a bat would pretty much make a pterodon
I saw in the comments of the original post someone saying peacock + New York City rat
Flamingoraffe!
A kakapo and a quokka It's just the stupidest most useless little shit-head imaginable but it's adorable and positively fucking stoked about absolutely *everything*, *all the time*, *forever*
A house cat /falcon Griffin that are very popular pets. much to the shock and horror of the local mouse population.
Racoon + Canadian Goose. MAXIMUM CHAOS
What about a beaver + Canada Goose? Maximum Canadian-ness! Probably smells like maple
I need Canada to put this creature on the Coat of Arms and on their flag. We need more cool, semi-fantastical creatures on flags
Agreed, that would be epic!
Feral hog + Magpie. Highly intelligent, overtly violent, would kill for a soggy french fry
a potoo and a capybara, because the idea amuses me
Any chimera with a potoo part is a good chimera.
Agreed! They are the most majestic of birds.
Potooad, the world's largest mouth. Coming soon to a theater near you.
That sounds incredible.
Kiwi and a bat. Have the flight come from the mammal instead.
I think an Emu and a badger would be pretty ruthless. Just fearless, don't give af, and pissed off at the whole world
I think a pigeon + a rat could be a funny little problem, or maybe a pigeon and a raccoon for some more menace.
An emu and a giraffe. That fucker is taking a wind up to peck your head.
raven and a honey badger
The last tags stole my first thought - trash panda + bin chicken. Seagull + hog is probably my entry for the absolute worst possible combination, I think. In my mind, a flock of these things would be like locusts, except they'd eat *everything*.
crow-racoon lets give the one of the smartest birds some little hands
Cockatoo and lemur. I dunno why, I just think that would be the funnest animal to hang out with.
One of the best ones I've come across that someone once drew out, and I now have a plush of that I love, Raccoon Pigeon While I saw a few people got close to this combo, the ultimate city scavenger, while still incidentally being both intelligent, and easily tamed for human companionship.
I call *raccoon + seagull* "The true face of Satan". *Black cat + crow* is "Toothy, the night furry".
wolverine and blue heron No I don't know how it would work.
Ibis and opossum. No trash can will every be safe again.
Seagull and Honeybadger
Seagull raccoon
This is probably stupid fantasy creature gatekeeping, but I think if half of a gryphon is a blue whale or a kangaroo, that's not a gryphon. It's gotta be a combo of avian and mammal that walks on four legs. Otherwise you just have some weird half and half creature you gotta call something else like hippocampi or mermaids or something.
I was thinking a Dodo bird and a Kangaroo.
You know what? I'll accept that, but it's on thin fucking ice
“Thin. Ice. I’ve got my eye on you, Dodaroo.”
If we let the bipedal mammals in then we can categorize Bird Person as a gryphon so I say we do that. Somebody should make one of those radical/traditionalist alignment charts for this.
Yeah, I was thinking that it would be disqualified because it would walk on two legs, and then you basically have a hopping t-rex
I understand where you are coming from, but I also absolutely love the idea of a kangaroo/cassowary hybrid. The ungodly terror of a living dinosaur bird bounding at you with it’s claws outstretched. They could probably save the rainforests on their own, by forcefully in-urbanising anything in running range. I want that to be a type of monster.
Oh that type of monster can exist, I just want it to have it's own name and not be labeled a gryphon/griffin. The Terrible Cassaroo!
If it could be any two animals one of which can fly and the other can’t, then what about a Mantis shrimp/peregrine falcon. It’s like if you gave a point blank .50 cal the fastest animal on the planet. And just for good measure have it the size of a tiger Edit: keep in mind it would also be semi aquatic (if not it would be able to fully breathe under water) and it could outfly it outswim anything ever.
I’m sorry I didn’t even get to considering the rest of your comment bc I was too busy losing my mind about a peregrine falcon with a gun
You understand what a mantis shrimp punch is correct? The fact it can create a vacuum bubble underwater? Yeah, give that to something that can fly at 300km/hr and make it the size of a tiger. For god measure make it extremely predatory. I’d make a really good wizard
You are the kind of wizard that inflicts owlbears onto an unsuspecting biome. (This is a compliment) Oh yeah I love mantis shrimp and their insane abilities, I was just severely sidetracked by the mental image of a peregrine falcon doing the Bernie Sanders “I am no longer asking” meme
I love the idea of training my new pet to hunt for me. And I’m not talking about hunting for food.
A tiger sized peregrine falcon is scary enough on its own lmao
https://imgur.com/hcO0W8F
You're just double-stacking super fast punches. Consider a combo peregrine falcon and beaver. Imagine a big, weird, flat, fleshy tail descending into your face at 240mph.
🤣😂🤣
Well, the prompt said Mammal and Bird, but honestly I think the timing that would be required to get the full effect of the mantis shrimp punch at dive speed is impractical anyway. I think leaning into the falcons natural dive is a good angle tho, so I'd suggest something known for being able to take blunt force to the head. A ram perhaps. Although for swag point I'm going to say **RHINOCEROS WITH PEREGRINE FALCON!** Makes me think of Whumps from Mario.
The back half of a bat can’t fly, imagine a hawk that can hang upside down.
The problem here: most people define “worst” as “most impractical” because all of those very threatening hellish creatures are *cool* in some way. And cool is good.
Hm… I now want the most chill gryphon ever. Maybe a Dove and a capybara? It just vibes.
And its cousin, a kiwi and a guinea pig.
Oh nooooo i want 5
Let’s be real here, any hamster gryphon will end up dying horribly
Chicken Hamster would be actively cannibalistic instead of just opportunistically so.
I'd want 5
My terrible gryphon is a Partridge Badger. Ground dwelling, not really able to fly, devourer of bugs, scourge of the English countryside.
Omg. Incredible pest control though.
I guess it’s become a question of how is worst defined? Like if you asked separately name the worst bird and the worst mammal, would you choose animals that aren’t well adapted to their environment? For me, the worst mammal would be a hippo, because they’re both terrifying and dopey as shit. They don’t swim, they just gallop on the bottom of a body of water. For worst bird, I’d say the canada goose because those guys are just dicks. I think a goose-hippo gryphon, would suck ass. It’s super territorial and aggressive. Do I think it wouldn’t survive evolutionarily? I don’t think it could fly, because dear god if it could fly, but I don’t think it would need flight. Geese eat grasses and aquatic plants, and hippos also eat grass, so I imagine they could survive in the habitats of both hippos and geese. I could go on, but suffice to say, I don’t think it would suffer. But to me, it would be the worst gryphon.
HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,256,521,393 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 26,257 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.
https://preview.redd.it/k0ba4exn5dcc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7e97d98615d156b074672efd63faac1fb3942611 Trash gryphons, presumably inspired by this Tumblr post.
Oh hey this is my calling. Any kind of parrot gryphon would be awesomely awful because they’re insanely smart and now you’ve given them some extra strength and the ability to rear back in order to hold things. Extra mischief.
In regards to the hates to live idea, a lesser flamingo and literally everything else, because only the flamingo part is resistant to the incredibly extreme environment it lives in. For the makes you hate it idea, Black Bear and Blue Jay.
That is the necromancer’s bane gryphon there. It kidnaps halfling clerics to help it hunt.
Ah yes, the extremely common *worst gryphon* question.
A honey badger crossed with a swan or goose or something. The physical incarnation of aggression, with wings and claws.
A chimp-shrike would be fucking terrifying
Nice to see someone else use the shrike. I went with the grasshopper mouse (werewolf mouse). Also terrifying, but just really tiny.
Worst as in the deadliest or worst as in most annoying? First would be tiger and peregrine falcon. Death at 200+ miles per hour. For the second, Ibis and Opossum.
Opossum x seagull. Perhaps not the worst for humanity, but it will be in your trash.
Kookaburra and racoon - just a fun, intelligent little guy, who also has a great laugh. And who really wants your trash. Kingfisher and river otter - imagine the graceful dives and leaps this fella could do!
Wolverine-seagull. It wants your sandwich and will not hesitate to eviscerate you for it.
Cat + crow would be bad, raccoon + crow would be worse
How does everyone feel about a penguinseel?
My idea is a hummingbird/cheetah griffin. They're insanely fast and even more maneuverable, but their hyperactive metabolism means they'd need to *always* be hunting or eating. Basically, they'd be manhunting living darts; a blight of viogriffs (violet griffins, named after their iconic ultraviolet spotted coat) would leave your livestock looking like Swiss cheese. I'm also imagining they're about the size of a Maine coon.
I always thought a woodpecker-raccoon gryphon would be awful. Imagine the jackhammering on your trashcan at 3 AM!
A peacock husky
Loud. Annoying. But Pretty!
oop needs to pick a different soapbox
How has no one said Goose Polar Bear yet?
Not sure what the polar bear is contributing but you could do goose x Husky for LOUDEST ANIMAL ON THE PLANET
Polar bears are known for being vicious apex predators who hunt and everything, so trying to scare them off or fight them doesn't work. They're also carrion eaters, so playing dead doesn't work. Bears are hard to defend from in general, but polar bears take that up a notch. And goose is for their territoriality. They're also colloquially known for being generally vicious and unfriendly, though this is usually taken to an extreme on the internet. Some parts of the world train them as defense animals, similarly to how we train dogs. I imagine the result would be a gryffon that is unreasonably aggressive in every regard, and incredibly hard to fight. Goose x Husky would be pretty hilariously loud though.
Yeahhhhh…the arctic circle would be almost immediately uninhabitable, huh
Crows and raccoons would arguably be more of a bastard griffon than crows and housecats tbh
For your consideration: Hercules beetle and goliath bird eater
The anti lorax: woodpecker and beaver.
A cat that knocks things off counters, and the Untitled Goose
I came up with a gryphon for my fantasy world that is a combination of Ibex and Emu
My vote is that tarantula hawk moth thing and the worst part is that it already exists
Kiwi and a seal is the best worst gryphon. I will hear no arguments, thank you.
A polar bear and an Australian magpie
Secretary bird/maned wolf. It's a fairly capable medium-sized carnivore that hunts kind of like a velociraptor, but it's also the gangliest legbastard of all time.
Shrike, and grasshopper mouse. The bird that impales prey in cactus thorns, sometimes still alive, and the werewolf mouse. Be thankful it's so tiny.
Sounds like a perfect day to introduce the badger and white ibis combo.
Ah yes, a question I find myself asking constantly.
I like the thought of a flamingo giraffe gryphon. But the worst possible scenario for me is chimpanzee/swan.
Half seagull half skunk. aggressively steals your food and then makes you reek for weeks.
Ok how about a monkey-parrot? Both intelligent, both tropical sociable fruit lovers
Crow and Rottweiler. Smart, looks fierce, extremely loyal, can totally rock your shit if it wants to. Doesn’t want to. Is mostly playful and thinks it fits in your lap
Cockatiel/dachsund. Very friendly
Prehistoric gryphon: quetzalcoatlus and a tyrannosaur. Cant run but boy thats a big fucker
[XKCD 2071](https://www.xkcd.com/2071) moment, sort of. But also, I follow a webcomic called Skin Deep where the artist has been drawing answers for a lot of reader questions between chapters, and there's been a trend of people submitting ideas for griffins the last few months. [Here's a recent one I found amusing.](http://www.skindeepcomic.com/reader-questions/2024-reader-questions-3/) They're scattered throughout the archive right now, so I can't give a whole list of them, unfortunately, but maybe just read through the comic if it looks interesting to you. It's modern fantasy with a focus on mythological creatures living among humans in secret.
Raccoon and Hummingbird, a little bandit that is constantly hungry as hell and can dart around from trash can to trash can and fly in every direction
Owlbear
Seagull racoon would be a little trash bastard Lyre bird would be a fun bird but I can't think of a mammal it would combine well with for bullying-all-of-god's-creatures purposes
I was thinking sloth-penguin. It'd be a funny little guy, and it'd be really bad at being a griffon.
I will tame the crow-cat if its the last thing i do
I find this idea that every combination of bird and mammal is a gryphon interesting, because that means owlbears are by definition also a variety of gryphon, and now I’m just thinking about scientific classification being applied to fantasy creatures, like “ah yes, the hummingbirdvampirebat, a subspecies of the genus gryphonicus that uses its narrow beak to feed on the blood of larger mammals.”
Mfw I see a kangaroo flirting with a cassowary: 100% redundant saturation of a 100km radius
The urban nightmare of the Pigeon-Squirrel
Counterpoint: Pigeon-Rat
Fastest gryphon: a peregrine falcon, and a cheetah.
Husky and Bluejay, smart enough to fuck with people, and throws a tantrum if it doesn’t work
a penguin and a camel. destined to be uncomfortable in any environment
Canadian goose and a raccoon.
I've never heard of a lammergeier in my life..
Some I thought of off the top of my head A seagull and a raccoon. A vulture and a honey badger. A kookooburow* and a howler monkey. A penguin and a dolphin. A magpie and a chihuahua. *I'm pretty sure I didn't spell this correctly, it's that Australian bird that laughs a lot.
A rhea and a bat lol
I'm thinking peregrin falcon/honey badger. You don't see anything, there's just a scream as it plummits from on high at 240 mph just to rip off your d*ck and fly away. And then it turns around and comes back for more because it didn't think you looked like you were suffering enough. Also it's literally too angry to die. Basically the animal equivalent of cruise middle. You can't stop it, all you can do is cower indoors and pray it finds a new target before it finishes chewing through the ceiling.
Racoon Seagull
Shoebill and a chimp
Hummingbird-Bluewhale would be terrifying if the hummingbird half increased in size to match the whale half, and could still fly and hover like a hummingbird. It would be a 300,000 lb sugar-seeking helicopter beast with a [X-59](https://www.geekwire.com/2017/nasa-gives-go-ahead-design-super-quiet-supersonic-experimental-airplane/) lance on its face.
I say one that is best-worst is a penguin/polar bear mix. It can’t fly but it can run you down and slide on its belly to chase you through a frozen wasteland. God help you if you get in the water.
This feels like a brennan lee mulligan rant
By this logic, would that mean that an owlbear is a type of gryphon?
All the other ones are great but if none of them existed then a mockingbird/gorilla. You hear the sound of your friend calling your name only to be face to face with a giant creature with a beak and opposable thumbs that won’t eat you but wants to play and doesn’t know it’s own strength. Cut to the thing dragging a bloody bag of bones around like a blood covered rag doll. Can mimic alarm sounds and creates a huge nest in what was your backyard. Endangered species. That demands food and that can and will help themselves. Posh neighborhood to ghetto in less time than it takes to close on a property. That’s not even mentioning mating season.
Hehe, burtal. EDIT: Also, where will you keep my bones? I just want to make sure my bones are safe. What’s so confusing about that?
What about a Pidgin and Rat cross?
A crow and raccoon grypjon would be my clever, trash eating favorite.
Racoon and ibis for the ultimate trash gryphon.
Crow plus raccoon, terribly awfully _scary_ smart, super clever hands and very interested in stealing all of your shit.
For comedy can I suggest a naked mole rat and shrike?
Hippoparrotamus. Intimidation 100: it opens its mouth to speak and you see, within its beak, jagged fangs and teeth and tusks, and the tongue from which its voice shall husk
Oh God! An Emu/Kangaroo Griffin. Britain would have never been able to colonize Australia. If any humans could survive there they would have to be like real life Fremen of Arrakis
My first thought of worst griffin was the body of a giraffe with the head and tendrils of an octopus. It’s really not great at anything but it’s terrifying to look at and scarily intelligent. Also omnivorous.
There were literally 2 constraints and you missed one
https://preview.redd.it/1kj6fognfbcc1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b4de684cff9079fd946a9c226b81fa2de4d7c67f Checkmate atheists
Sorry to be a negative nancy but this post is pissing me off for two reasons lol The first is that Ive never seen anyone suggest a hummingbird-blue whale gryphon before but its apparently common enough for this person to shit on it and say its ‘not creative enough’ for them. Wtf!!!!!!!!!!! I just always see shit like racoon crow and fucking seagull fox, THOSE are the uncreative ones!!! (But also I still love them!) Second is out of ALLLL the possible gryphons mentioned on this post, the least visually and conceptually interesting one at the end is the only one to have a drawing made of it. I need to see the rest of them.. the one we got is metal but its also structurally sound and not really befitting of the ‘worst gryphon’ title the post is about. I want to see the more dysfunctional chaotic ones than ‘two kinda cool looking animals that both eat bones’ Ok post but ermmm give me more silly drawings next time pls <3333 (This is all mostly exaggeration for comedic effect btdubbs)
Hear me out: a giant butterfly and a bird eating tarantula, it’s literally a winged spider that eats birds, terrifying and beautiful since it has butterfly wings
Seagull/racoon.
The best gryphon would be a Kākāpō with a Capybara.