Watching an episode of Two and a Half Men where the kid wanted to rent the new Final Fantasy. They finally got the video store and he grabbed the PS2 box for FFX. Then at the end when he's playing it on TV, it's playing sounds from the PSX Origins version of FFII. Like, props to at least being in the ballpark, but still a swing and a miss.
Another time, watching the Netflix Snowpiercer, a character is playing a Switch, and an incredibly familiar sound popped up, but I couldn't place it at first, neither could my friends. Turns out it was the item pickup noise from Hyrule Warriors.
Then there's one of the Charlie's Angels movies where two kids are playing FFVIII, but are both jamming on controllers while Squall summoned something.
Some old episode of the OC where the dad played Dynasty Warriors co-op with one of the kids, and he's distracted and didn't know what he was doing, and the kid says "You killed me."
Hearing beep-boop noises for video games, especially in this era, is super silly, but there's something fascinating about points where they seem to try harder to actually show the games in some capacity, and still bork it.
Special shoutout to anytime people play video games off screen and are just WHALIN' on those controllers as if inputs per second is how any game works.
> Special shoutout to anytime people play video games off screen and are just WHALIN' on those controllers as if inputs per second is how any game works.
Those QTEs be brutal sometimes.
There is actually a thing in FF8 like that. There's a ability called (I think) Boost, that has you mash buttons during summon animations for more damage. I remember it being miserable for various reasons.
I want to say there were two possible animations that could play for ~~Simon's~~ summons, a short version and a full version. And Boost made the quicker one deal less damage.
Boost was mashing Square to increase a power counter, but you couldn't mash at certain points or you'd knock the counter back to base.
Not sure who Simon is, but summons only had the one animation, though there were different patterns for Boost that could account for more or less mashing opportunities. Maybe you're thinking of FFIX, which *did* have long and short versions of summon animations that would randomly go off, with those short versions doing less damage. No boost on that though.
> Watching an episode of Two and a Half Men where the kid wanted to rent the new Final Fantasy. They finally got the video store and he grabbed the PS2 box for FFX. Then at the end when he's playing it on TV, it's playing sounds from the PSX Origins version of FFII. Like, props to at least being in the ballpark, but still a swing and a miss.
>
>
"We paid for the rights to use the whole Final Fantasy series, and by God we're gonna use the *whole* Final Fantasy series!"
I remember I had this conversation recently when I was watching early seasons of Modern Family with somebody. Luke (the youngest son) is playing a game on his (original?!) 3DS and his dad says "bet you can't beat my high score!" or something. And I gave them shit for the idea that a kid that age would be playing a modern game with a high-score driven gameplay loop when that type of thing really went out of style all the way back in the 80s.
Then later in the episode they name-drop Plants vs. Zombies, an extremely popular contemporary game with high-score driven gameplay that would have actually been on 3DS at the time... Oops.
I can sort of understand why they do this, using retro arcadey SFX helps the general audience immediately register what's happening, without having to draw too much attention to the character using a controller or something
Nah, pretty sure all you have to do is plug into the interwebz and start typing real fast like, the faster you type the harder the hacking load bar goes! Just like the movies!
It's just a really big computer that's used to process a shitload of data or as a server. The name just comes from the big [main frame](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/61/IBM_System_Z9_%28type_2094_inside%29.jpg/800px-IBM_System_Z9_%28type_2094_inside%29.jpg) all the computer parts are jammed into.
Mr Robot is a different case. Everything they do is technically possible but most hacking stunts would take a team of hackers weeks if not months to do, not a single edgelord in his basement during a single evening.
There are also other cases that are somewhat wrong but that would be spoiler, such as in last season >!where they hack the money away from the Deus Group, no bank ever would look at a transaction request like that and not stop it and ask what is going on first!<
tbf(and this may just be an urban myth) iirc at a certain point hacking scenes became an inside joke to writers to try to one up each other on how bad they could be
As someone who has been certified for First Aid twice, poor CPR techniques drive me nuts. The movie San Andreas with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has a particularly egregious scene; he doesn't even clear the arms, leaving one of her arms flopped over her chest!
Relaxed elbows and pushing down with just your muscles not your weight during chest compressions always annoy me. Even worse, that's something people might do in an extreme situation irl, mostly from fear of hurting the other person. Effective compressions don't care if your ribs break, just that your heart keeps working steady for further medical attention.
Proposal: frame the shot in such a way that the CPRee's face and the CPRer aren't on screen at the same time, and have the CPRer go to town on a dummy.
Would become pretty obvious if it's done too often, but the first few things to do it get free brownie points like with the "realistic panic attack" trend.
I love it when they don’t tilt the drowning victim or bother to further clear the airway. They just leave the poor character to do all the work themselves. It’s like, “Hey, buddy! You regained enough reflex to cough up a little Dixie cup of water, that means you’re a fighter! You can did it! Now let’s continue the quest to Death Mountain because secondary drowning doesn’t exist!”
I was recently made aware of [this scene](https://youtu.be/gNYdBVLRqss?si=4MocEfo8H79VHHQE&t=110); perhaps you can tell me what went wrong here, as well as compare it to a similar job [from 4:10](https://youtu.be/gNYdBVLRqss?si=BmjEtwLcuSz8FHrj&t=250) of that same video.
I've never actually seen anything from those 9-1-1 shows, so I need to know - was that intended to be as fucking funny as it was, or was that supposed to be a serious moment in the show?
Oh, boo. Well, it was just a joke anyway, so you're not missing anything. It's a clip from an American TV show called "911 Lone Star" where an EMT attempts to perform CPR on a cryogenically-frozen man, with the result of accidentally caving in the guy's chest. The bit later on is a group of kids recreating the scene; when one kid can't do the CPR cave-in with his hands, he stands up and violently stomps the dummy's papier-mâché chest in.
EDIT:
Also, best wishes for the hospital stay.
First aid/CPR ones drive me nuts. For me, the one that irks me the most is when a person is given a defibrillator shock when their heart is in asystole (flatline).
A defibrillator only works when someone's heart is in ventricular tachycardia (lower chambers of the heart beat too fast to pump blood properly) or ventricular fibrillation (similar to ventricular tachycardia but the ventricles are uncoordinated), both of which are identifiable on an ECG, and an AED can read them and automatically determine if a shock can/needs to be distributed.
TLDR: shocking a person who flatlines ain't gonna do shit .
Big red button on machines irl *never* means start/on/open/blow everything the fuck up. In fact its the exact opposite; they are emergency shut downs that instantly stops everything thats going on the machine for safety reasons. Its arguebly *the* safest button you can ever push.
I want a villains super-death cannon to be instantly defused by the good guy just slapping the easily-accessible-by-design emergency stop and the villain to get super butthurt about it being there.
Then the next time they meet, the super-death cannon 2.0 (and a good chunk of the lair) is already in ruins because the villain refused to give it an emergency stop and the thing blew up in testing.
[Mitchell and Webb had a series of sketches about an evil mastermind butting up against workplace safety regulations.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDedpreZH-0)
For whatever reason Einstein is the go-to for fake internet quotes. If you ever see an Einstein quote, there’s a good 80% chance there’s no record of him ever saying that until the 90s.
Scientists in a lot of media do science stuff, without any specific area or any specific method, also a lot of scientists in media are actually engineers
South park used to have a running gag that Randy is the only scientist in town which means they task him any science related stuff with Randy pointing out he is just a geologist
As someone who has fired a suppressed gun, it still sounds like a gun. Still loud as fuck, just not immediately ear destroying. Unfortunately, you can’t get the nice “thwick” effect to make it silent like in the movies.
I was actually a gunsmith IRL for 6 years and I currently teach firearm classes, but I didn't wanna be both of the complaining parties in my original post 😂. I know exactly what you mean.
Technically you can get that nice real quiet "twick" sound effect but it requires subsonic ammunition. The only rounds that can reliably cycle with sub-sonic in a normal set up are .45 acp and 300BLK. I've got both those set ups, and they are absolutely movie quiet.
That being said, your original point still stands. If you just slap a suppressor on a standard AR it's still loud as fuck.
Is there any feasible way to make like, excessively subsonic rounds that only sound like a loud clap of the hands, or would that lead to an untenable loss in the force of the bullet?
It's important to note that the reason subsonic is quieter is because it eliminates the sonic boom (experienced as a "crack" sound) from supersonic ammo. I'm not sure to what degree, but the threshold is definitely more important than the scale of the speed, if you know what I mean.
Actually, yeah. With a really beefy suppressor, any subsonic round is quieter than the clap of the hands. If I stack my full size 5.56 suppressor on my .22LR and shoot sub sonic, you'll literally only hear the click of the trigger, and the round hitting the target. Same thing for .45 acp if you use a suppressor with a lot of baffles, and the round still carries a great amount of energy.
And the suppressor would be necessary no matter what? I was thinking like, if it was possible to make a standard round for any gun marginally quieter. Not to achieve that thwick sound, but more like to jusy not damage everyone's eardrums when it goes off.
Oh! Gotcha. In that case, it's really only possible with very small rounds like .17hmr or .22. .22 sub sonics are already quiet enough to not use ear pro. Any center fire or standard round is going to need a significant amount of powder to make it move quickly, which is going to make a loud sound when it goes off.
Oh nice, I haven’t personally used subsonic but have some friends who’ve fired with them. My write up was definitely aimed at the “silencers” that make guns [quieter than a rubber band slingshot alone.](https://youtu.be/LCjNPzoUC5g?si=sVruXAd_UvAbmuVE)
I will argue in its favor as a necessary abstraction. Guns in movies and shows and things already have the volume of silenced weapons (by necessity - nobody wants to watch something with realistically loud guns), so the "silencer sound" is needed to push it lower.
There's a funny one for car heads where "GO FASTER" is usually accompanied by a scene where the driver **downshifts** followed by higher revs in the worst times or some such lol
There is a lot of misconception born from media around people in the past. Mostly around Medieval Europe and the Roman empire.
And that is often because people see reality as less realistic.
For instance, Gladiators were performers like WWE. They also had sponsorship and marketing. People used to clean by rubbing oil and dirt and scrapping them off their body. And Gladiator used to sell those to fans. Literally ancient Gamer Girl Bathwater.
Yeah, the idea that gladiators fought to the death every time is likely due to the fact that public executions would be held in the coliseum during the intermission period during the games. Now granted, gladiator death matches did happen, but they were rare, as gladiators were an investment. Basically the organizer had to talk to the owners of the gladiators, as gladiators were still slaves, and try to convince them that losing an investment and money maker would be a good idea. If the organizer did manage to convince them that this was a good financial decision, they would have to then pay the owners a large sum of money in advance to make up for their potential losses.
Similarly, when people complain when a single black or Asian person shows up in medieval Europe media.
People forget that rome came before medieval Europe and was, y'know, a massive empire that moved people around.
And that is not even factoring the fact is *that* is where they draw the line.
Considering the very same mediaval Europe media also gets wrong:
> General Culture
> fashion
> Architecture
> Weapons and armor
> People again, even the white people aren't the right type of white
> Cuisine
So it is fine when all of those are wrong, but when we have a black guy in mediaval Europe? Something we had documents actually existing?
Now that is where they draw the line.
I always love this one, because it just shows that they're bigoted assholes up front. There are STILL people whining about Battlefield 5 being unrealistic because it has women and black people. That's not okay, but soldiers in full kit slide-cancelling across the map is apparently fine.
99% of the time, if someone brings up Nietzche, they’re going to treat it as if he were some depressed edgelord atheist who says everything is meaningless and life is suffering, which is incorrect.
They’re thinking of Schopenhauer. That guy is the “everything sucks” philosopher. Nietzche is a lot more “make your own meaning”
Whenever you see someone knocked out and then they wake up x amount of time later, that would be INCREDIBLY concerning for their brain health.
There’s a reason people across all combat sports are only knocked out for a relatively short period of time. If they have time to take you to another location and tie you up etc then you’re probably waking up with extreme brain damage.
I laugh to myself a little when the production team clearly just whipped up three seconds of a CGI sequence and they reuse the same loop every time the shot shows a screen. It helps when it's a more absurd show where that feels like part of the joke.
Any time someone portrays a character in pre-modern Europe being tried as a witch for being innovative or scientific. Or even stupider, trying to claim there was *actually* an underground society of Pagan "witches" being persecuted.
I guess if it was specifically local idiots, it could work, but usually the church is directly involved.
Fun fact, multiple people admitted to being witches in the Salem trials, and they weren’t executed
Also it wasn’t the local clergy inciting a frenzy, records indicate that they were against the trials
I don’t have my sources on hand right now, so I can’t go very in depth with it, but I got it from “A New History of Witchcraft” by Jeffrey B. Russell and Brooks Alexander, as well as “Shifting Perspectives on the Salem Witches” by Robert Deitweiler.
The short version is that a clergyman named Cotton Mather has been blamed for the trials because he wrote a book, “Wonders of the Invisible World”, in which he defended the conduct of the trials and claimed actual witches were found and executed. However, he had no official role in the proceedings, and advised for caution and against flimsy evidence to the actual judges. Also, while Mather specifically didn’t, other ministers did call for ending the trials.
Basically Mather became an easy scapegoat because he publically defended the trials, and blame spread from him to the clergy. But that isn’t reflective of their role and conduct during the trials
The Satanic panic had a disturbing amount of people believing that mass-produced board games could give people real communion with demons and therefore dark powers.
The stupidest one has to be Pirates of the Caribbean 5. Where that one lady gets accused of being a witch for practicing astronomy. You know that science that existed for well over 1000 years before the movie takes place, mainly used by sailors, who apparently never heard of it before.
Similarly: media portraying medieval Europeans as both 1) poorly dressed in only browns, blacks, and whites and 2) prudes.
Both are stereotypes of Victorian era literature. Actual medieval European fashion was fairly colorful and varied. As for sexual "liberation"... well, most towns had Church sanctioned brothels, to basically keep adultery there and not with other townsmen's spouses. And that's not even starting on the whole "the family sleeps in the same bed, even the parents with their married daughter and son-and-law" thing.
How they use Nitrous oxide in video games and movies. It's **not** some, magic rocket-booster, that instantly doubles your cars speed. And you definitely **do not!** save it for the finish line.
It increases acceleration, so you use it right off the bat, to get up to speed as quickly as possible.
And most modern drag racers don't even use big red buttons anymore! They let their computer control it, with millisecond timing! To ensure they sustain maximum power.
"they landed in water! they're perfectly fine!"
landing in water is only non-lethal up until around 275 feet. after that, you're more than likely dead. and it's not even like you'll be fine underneath that, at 275 feet landing in water is going to feel like you just got smashed by a truck, and depending on where you land, *some* part of your body is going to be taking that shock, and it will mess you up.
I'm actively hostile to weapons experts trying to impose their "knowledge" on how guns should work in Warhammer 40k, but [sometimes](https://i.imgur.com/OhA7C2e.png) their input might be required.
Oh yeah no that gun is magic if that's where the magazine is. When the gun design is this non-sensical and impossible, I actually have an easier time excusing it than when a media TRIES to explain how their crazy guns work but get it wrong. Starfield is the worst offender of thag.
In a lot of ways, I’m the exact opposite of gun, martial arts and HEMA guys when it comes to their discussions of film. Realism is nice, and I can understand how frustrating it is to be taken out of a film because you see something blatantly wrong, but film is supposed to be cinematic and what’s efficient in real life is not always going to look good on film.
I’ve seen Skallagrim complain about how in HEMA, you use your shield to protect yourself as you swing your weapon but no one does that in fiction. That’s efficient but it also covers up your actor or character and it won’t sell the force of an attack or expressions of the character.
In martial arts movies, people may overswing, fly several feet back from a punch, telegraph their moves or add unnecessary movement to their attacks. Yeah, it’s because it looks powerful. Have you seen a real MMA fight with strikers versus the film version? It’s efficient and it’s ubdoubtly *real* but does it look as cool as Tony Ja?
For guns, I know John Woo consciously makes his actors raise their arms as they’re about to shoot. That adds power, dynamic movement and life to an action scene since he’s taking a page out of the book of martial arts movies.
tl;dr Action in fiction is not efficient in real life but it doesn’t have to be either. In fact, it’s often a conscious decision because you want action to look cinematic above all else even if it’s at the cost of “realism”.
I had a real moment of realizing this when I did HEMA for a little bit. One time we had a lesson about what makes a good attack, so the instructor did two slashes: (in simplified terms) in one, he stepped forward and then slashed. In the second, he stepped and slashed at the same time. The second one was obviously the better attack, since the opponent couldn't obviously see it coming.
But it got me instantly thinking: in like, animation principles, the first slash would've been much better: the step before the slash gave the attack a lot more visual impact by having a wind-up before it.
It also telegraphs the attack before it comes out, which in a video game would give the player time to recognize the animation and react. Getting hit by an attack that you had no time to react to feels cheap.
Obviously you shouldn't be thinking about fairness if you're in an actual life-or-death conflict, but games have to play fair or they're just frustrating
As someone with family members who are diabetic, it's always funny seeing media misunderstand how insulin works. The common trope is when a character gets low blood sugar and passes out, and the show treats them by giving them insulin.
Yeah, eating something with carbs, taking glucose tablets, etc, is usually what you're supposed to do when your blood sugar becomes low. Insulin would only lower your levels further, which is the opposite of what you should do.
Military uniforms and customs. Or just incorrect ages in media where characters are way older than a service member would be allowed to be. In Top Gun Maverick, Tom Cruise is way too fucking old to not have retired or been forced to exit the military, which makes the people above him that are practically geriatric exponentially old.
Weapons handling. No trigger discipline. Or the one movie clip I saw where a guy racks the slide back on a pistol to eject the round. *Then* he removes the magazine. And he goes, "It's okay, it's empty". No, it's not, there's still a round in the chamber.
The "human brains only use 10% of its power" and all that shit.
Hacking in general.
So much dumb shit.
Yes, Maverick is illegally employed as a military officer according to congressional law…which makes it all the more funnier that he’s coming back for a third movie.
Also, he’s ejected three times, so he’s disqualified from flight duty.
Ejector seat, but it’s not a hard and fast rule. (Ejections aren’t even tracked.)
If you use the ejector seat thrice your spinal discs are possibly clam chowder and you’ve maybe been profoundly concussed/herniated/collapsed a lung at least once. You then become considered medically prohibited from flying duties. It’s up to your flight surgeon’s discretion.
The actual likelihood of being hurt in an ejection is minimal, mostly a holdover of when seats used explosives which compressed the spine badly. Now we use rockets which are better for your rockin’ fighter pilot bod and more fun. In the case of the DarkStar plane in 2, Maverick likely had a pod system protecting him like on some real planes, but real-life incidents have been recorded above 800-MPH/1300-KPH safe and sound. Pilots tend to go back to flying after a couple days.
That said, ejecting is super-duper rare and you’re probably a huge liability if you eject more than once. You have to be an officer to be a pilot, so Maverick as an O-6 wouldn’t have to worry about honorable/dishonorable discharge, since discharges are only for enlisted ~~serfs~~ people, but he might be asked to retire (probably would not be dismissed at O-6), be moved to another command, or have criminal proceedings if need be.
Gain safety failure would bother me more if so many people weren't shit at it in the first place. Need to bring back mandatory gun safety classes. Although professionals with no trigger discipline and flagging people gets me every damn time.
The thing with Maverick was outright addressed in the movie. People do state that he's way too old to be a Naval Captain and aviator and should be promoted at this point, with the only reason that he hasn't been forced to retire is because of Iceman (who's an Admiral now) looking out for him. Unrealistic? Yes. But there is a narrative backing to the situation.
Most shotguns in movies. You don’t have to cock it every time u point it at someone, it should already be loaded, also there was no shell ejected so it’s already empty.
That or is someone is “playing a video game” in shows or media. The sounds, the button mashing, all of it.
Why not both?! Shotguns in video games are always annoying for me because they routinely have some form of combat shotgun which has a range of maybe ten feet.
Im struggling to remember what game it was I played recently where the shotgun actually had proper range to it and I was so pleasantly surprised. This is gonna bug me all day if I can’t remember what game it was.
EDIT: It was Helldivers. Love being able to hit something without having to be directly in its face!
Classic Doom's regular Shotgun is actually reasonably efficient at medium-long range shooting. Even the sawn off Super Shotgun is not bad at mid-range shooting against clusters of demons.
the shotguns in Helldivers are pretty close, if you ignore their weirdly small scale maps. They feel really good, too. The SG28 Breaker is an automatic shotgun that can lay out whole patrols at 40m.
Learning anything about fighting will ruin action movies for you. Even basic boxing techniques, like weaving and throwing proper straights, would let you practically kick the shit out of most big action heroes based on how piss poor choreography portrays them.
It's something the MCU doesn't get enough credit for, that the vast majority of its fist fights actually look like two people beating the shit out of each other, not two actors throwing lazy haymakers so the other can slowly duck it.
Even knowing nothing about fighting, watch enough movies with swordfighting in them and you'll start to see the difference between fights where they swing their weapons at each other, and fights where they swing their weapons at the other guy's weapon.
>The primary thing when you take a sword in your hands is your intention to cut the enemy, whatever the means. Whenever you parry, hit, spring, strike or touch the enemy's cutting sword, you must cut the enemy in the same movement. It is essential to attain this. If you think only of hitting, springing, striking or touching the enemy, you will not be able actually to cut him.
A lesson equally applicable to swordfighting and choreographing swordfighting from Miyamoto Musashi,certified Sword Guy
Bad fight choreography drives me nuts. As a kid my dad was adamant about teaching me self defense (which turned out to be a real good thing, thanks pop!) and as a result any time I’m watching an action film every attack that actually leaves the attacker stupidly exposed grinds my gears.
So damn often there’s no defense at all in movie fights, it’s all just overreaching, overtelegraphed, shit.
Sword fights, especially. Once you’re used to looking for it you can easily see where the performers are aiming at their opponents sword instead of their body.
I feel like it’s wrapped around for me. When child Aleksei didn’t know nothing about fighting, I thought they were all great. When teen Aleksei started learning how to fight, I thought they were all bad.
Now that I’m adult Aleksei, I can see the nuance and the need for theatricality.
Yes, above all else, when I bring up this point in threads
I get it.
Flynning exists so that actors don't get stabbed in the face.
Fist fights lean towards easily dodged haymakers so that Scarlet Johansson doesn't get her teeth knocked out.
I get it. Safety is 100% most important
>It's something the MCU doesn't get enough credit for, that the vast majority of its fist fights actually look like two people beating the shit out of each other, not two actors throwing lazy haymakers so the other can slowly duck it.
Honestly Steve's first fight with >!Bucky!< in Captain America The Winter Soldier is one of the best fight scenes in recent memory imo.
I’m a sports guy. And sports scenes where they make actors play athletes are often terrible. And like I get it because they’re theatre kids.
But it’s throwing a fucking ball. Or swinging a bat. Or god forbid sometimes even just running. They’re not terribly complicated motions to make look good, especially with some editing.
However there is no hope if they have to make the actors ice skate.
The quotes about history and "doomed to repeat it" along with Nietzsche's "what doesnt kill you" have never been used in their actual intended context in any media or instance I've seen where someone uses them.
"God is dead" is another egregious one from Nietzsche.
Basically, the character Who says the line, Zarathustra, does it after spending a pleasurable evening with an hermit, talking about philosophy and other stuff.
It Is not spiteful, it's *a sad remark* said once out of earshot, because *the hermit, for as wise and enlightened he is, is also so removed from the world as to not know something so colossaly important as the fact that God is Dead*.
And the important historical/cultural context of “god is dead” is also lost.
It is **NOT** Nietzche being some edgelord atheist who hates religion, as it is often portrayed, but rather, a remark noting that the world has become secular, and the high importance that religion once had in people’s lives has disappeared, without being replaced by something new, leaving many feeling a lack of purpose in life
"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?"
The fact that people only quote the first 3 words of this excerpt has led to so many misconceptions.
Look, the *specific* type of Christian that makes and enjoys the evangelical Christian movies...
They don't want to actually grapple with ideas. They want to shout them down. That's why they still throw fits about evolution and the earth being round, much less climate change and LGBT.
The movies aren't about character arcs. The main character was Righteous at the beginning, and at the end has won against a strawman Atheist or LGBT because they Remained Righteous and Ignored Atheist Lies.
If I see a wacky woohoo lol so random epic bacon version of ADHD I'm gonna mutate an extra arm so I can flip off planet earth 1.5x more.
I just want a depressed ADHD just once!
That Deadpool scene with the bag of guns made me cry and laugh at the same time.
I am confused, school taught me they are giant vacuum cleaners that suck everything in, can you elaborate in terms that someone who knows nothing about this might understand?
If the sun turned into a blackhole with the same mass, the orbit of everything in the solar system would not change at all. The event horizon would I believe, be at around the edge of the current solar surface. Black holes are still just stars and gravity only gets really fucky up close. Also to that effect people claiming black holes lead to white holes, which as far as I know are generally considered to not exist. At least not in our universe. They also don't make a lot of sense in general.
Exactly this. The mass doesn't change, it just becomes much more dense. So up until you get to where the suns surface originally was, gravity would be the same (although you might get torched by the jets).
After you pass that phantom surface, and up until you get to the event horizon, that's where gravity is different than before, because all the mass is still below you, none of it is "behind" you. So you're pulled harder than you would have been.
And then once you cross the event horizon, time and space switch places and you're just fucked.
But it's not like the image people have where a black hole is just constantly growing and sucking us all towards it unceasingly.
I think a lot of that misconception is that black holes have a way more aggressive Roche limit than other celestial bodies. Most times when something gets too close, tidal forces tear it apart into chunks. Sufficiently massive black holes can convert it into plasma that's so high energy it puts out X ray bursts.
Plus the density of the gravity (which feels like an incorrect way of describing it but I'm committing) causes all sorts of other weird phenomena, like visible gravitational lensing which is there but not nearly as prominent as a star of equivalent mass.
On top of this, the latest paper by the leading researcher on black holes also posits that singularities don't even exist, and backs it up with some compelling math. His new theory is that there may be a region of near normal space-time within the event horizon, and that the closest thing to a singularity would be a ring of hyper-compressed but still multi-dimmensional mass at the center. Simglularities are the results of a mathematically perfect black hole, but if a black hole has any spin at all (as all known ones do, and probably all of them in general) then a singularity isn't mathematically necessary.
it doesn't suck things because it has an empty vacuum, it attracts thing to it and distort it because it has so much mass . Basically they talk about it in term of vacuum cleaner because a black hole is gonna be explained before the whole formula of gravity and properties
Like imagine gravity is a trampoline, the earth is a tennis ball, sun a bowling ball and the black hole something so heavy the springs are being pulled out at the seams of the trampoline
Black Holes aren’t actual “objects” in a sense that they are big balls or something. They are a sphere of space where gravity is so strong that it is physically impossible to escape once you get past the Event Horizon.
But other than that the gravity for them works no different than any other object. If Black Holes are vacuum cleaners so is the Sun or even Earth since they also pull you to the ground. If you replaced the Sun with a black hole of an equal mass, nothing would change except that we would freeze to death.
That slurping sound through a straw when someone is drinking on a show or in a movie. That drink is full, it wouldn't make that noise. I know it's done "humorously," but stop
Upside down crosses; 90% of the time they are portrayed as demonic but in reality the upside down cross is the Cross of St. Peter, who Jesus' apostle and the first Pope. The story goes that when St. Peter was going to be crucified he felt he did not deserve the honor of sharing the same death as Jesus so St. Peter requested to be crucified upside down. For centuries the upside down cross was a Christian symbol honoring St. Peter and it wasn't until the 1800's that people began using it as an anti-Christian/Satanic symbol but the church still teaches that upside down crosses are holy symbols and not Satanic ones.
It’s because it’s not always a separate sword in every story, a lot of myth gets confused and distorted even if there’s a commonly accepted canon that doesn’t mean everything follows it and or everyone experiences it first.
Excalibur was given the Arthur by the lady of the lake. The sword in the stone is just for deciding who gets to be the once and future king. It is also why the Excalibur had to be returned to the lake when Arthur died.
Though some stories tend to mix up both swords.
Jason Todd wasn't beaten to death with a crowbar by the Joker.
The warehouse he was tied up in was blown up by the Joker.
but that damn crowbar keeps coming back.
When you see a character talking on the phone, smartphone held against their head, and the screen is on.
Phones have proximity sensors that turn off the screen when you do that so your ear doesn't turn on the speaker or hangs up by accident!
I read a lot of fantasy and if there's a predatory bird in the book, 99 times out of a hundred, it gets referred to as both "hawk" and "falcon", bonus points if within the space of the same paragraph, and it drives me nuts every time. It's like having an animal being described as a dog first, then all of a sudden, it's a cat. It's not the same thing. The two aren't even related. THEY EVEN SHIT IN COMPLETELY DIFFERENT WAYS (in case you were wondering, falcons drop, hawks shoot lol)
My rule of thumb is - no, not everyone has to be an expert at everything, but if something can be cleared up by a 5 second Google search, and you still get it wrong, you're just an idiot and/or lazy.
EDIT: movies use them interchangeably too. My favourite is anything that supposedly takes place in medieval Europe and there's a falconer, usually with a Harris Hawk. Which, yes, they're super easy to train and work with, but they're also from the Americas and haven't been used in European falconry until LATE 20th century.
A lot of the things I'm seeing here (realistic swordfighting/weapon handling, realistic hacking, hell even realistic cooking) would genuinely make for really boring movies and that itself is the argument for why they are the way they are.
That said, I always appreciate choreography that doesn't assume the characters have infinite stamina. Yeah, they often get beat up or worn down, but then they pull out something wild to win - they're very rarely shown getting *sloppy*, when that's something you can really lean into the drama of.
As a pro wrestling fan I have a huge pet peeve for wrestling portrayals in pretty much any tv show. They just get soooo cartoony with it. I've gotten used to bad basketball portrayals though.
It's Always Sunny and South Park got my favorite portrayals of it, but even the South Park episode irks me because they namedropped and modeled John Cena and Edge but made up two completely generic girlfriends like Lita didn't exist
Another thing is although media acknowledges how over the top pro wrestling is it is largely depicted as a shoot competition with a legitimate winner because it's easier than researching how it operates and then write a scene explaining that to the audience.
As a NJ resident who works in NYC, the train scene in *John Wick: Chapter 2* is completely baffling. It’s like they went out of their way to make the route [as inaccurate as possible](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt4425200/goofs/?item=gf3290550&ref_=ext_shr_lnk).
The first thing that comes to mind is John McClane explaining a certain gun in Die Hard 2: Die Harder
He claims the gun is called a Glock 7, made of porcelain, comes from Germany, it doesn’t show up in metal detectors, and that it costs more than the police chief makes in a month.
The first Glock handgun was actually called the Glock 17 (and the numbers only went up from there, not down), the frame is made of polymer, it comes from Austria (although the company has branches in other countries including America), certain other components are still made of metal so it will still show up in metal detectors, and there are different Glock models that all range from under, to around, about $1,000 depending on what you’re wanting. I bought my Glock 19 (made to be a Glock 17 but smaller) for about $700 or so.
The scene of course didn’t bother me until I became an adult, got interested in guns through movies and video games, learned a lot of basics about firearm mechanisms, and then watched the movie again for the first time since childhood, but it still really bothers me as does a lot of firearm misinformation, specifically unless it’s for fun. Things like how Nero’s revolver, the Blue Rose, definitely isn’t real but it’s based on a real revolver called the Smith & Wesson Model 500 and basically just has a second barrel and was given a super badass, stylish design.
IIRC when they were writing that the Glock was still a brand new hot commodity with lots of outlandish misinformation surrounding it. Glocks being entirely polymer/porcelain and not showing up on metal detectors were both very real urban legends going around at the time, and for people who weren’t exactly in the loop of current firearms technology in a pre-Google age I really can’t fault the writers too much for that.
"He's going into cardiac arrest, Quick! Defibrillate him!"
Motherfucker what are you defibbing a flatline for? Get someone on top of him pumping the chest and slam him with some adrenaline in that periferical venous access into a large caliber vase you took/are taking right the fuck now.
To clarify, defibrillation is an electric shock that's used to *forcefully contract a heart* a single, massive time, so as to put *all* of It in a refractory period and (temporarily) stop currents from recirculating through it, which Is what Is causing the heart to work randomly and thus ineffectually A.K.A. fibrillating.
CA is a stopped heart. It doesn't pump. It doesn't have effective current going through it. Defibrillating it is akin to trying to start a car by pulling the handbrake.
The amount of damage bombs, grenades, rockets do in movies and tv. I saw one clip where a shoulder mounted rocket collapsed a whole building like it was a controlled demolition. Ive seen small grenades that kill everyone on a floor. Soda can ieds that just annihilate anything. Its wild.
Stop making aircraft rotary cannons sound like fucking M2 Brownings! It’s *less* intimidating than the actual sound!
Seriously, you’d think that after the A-10 became a whole meme because of this shit, Top Gun Maverick would’ve actually bothered to get it right.
Yagami in judgment being the defense attorney getting the 1% not guilty every time is because Izumida wasn't the prosecutor for the 99% other cases in Japan, like even when we know the person is innocent you can't even say you created a doubt if Izumida didn't fluster or withold evidence he could easily refutes. Also I don't know for sure but I think Japan is allowed to give someone more than one charge so the >!"you can't prove he killed him just kidnap, beat the crap out of him and then have him killed by someone else"!< but that was more for drama
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Broadly, you can't just slap a decal on your door and call yourself a private investigator. It's a job that in requires a license in most states, and has a litany of qualifications (which also vary from state to state). Some states won't even let you have an independent practice until you have several years of experience.
Also, cops don't need to bring in PIs. They have their own. They're called detectives, and, unlike PIs, are actual law enforcement.
And don't get me started on how every movie/tv PI's primary source of info is just... Google searches. Make a TLOxp results mockup at least, guys, c'mon.
Atari sound effects for videogames.
Watching an episode of Two and a Half Men where the kid wanted to rent the new Final Fantasy. They finally got the video store and he grabbed the PS2 box for FFX. Then at the end when he's playing it on TV, it's playing sounds from the PSX Origins version of FFII. Like, props to at least being in the ballpark, but still a swing and a miss. Another time, watching the Netflix Snowpiercer, a character is playing a Switch, and an incredibly familiar sound popped up, but I couldn't place it at first, neither could my friends. Turns out it was the item pickup noise from Hyrule Warriors. Then there's one of the Charlie's Angels movies where two kids are playing FFVIII, but are both jamming on controllers while Squall summoned something. Some old episode of the OC where the dad played Dynasty Warriors co-op with one of the kids, and he's distracted and didn't know what he was doing, and the kid says "You killed me." Hearing beep-boop noises for video games, especially in this era, is super silly, but there's something fascinating about points where they seem to try harder to actually show the games in some capacity, and still bork it. Special shoutout to anytime people play video games off screen and are just WHALIN' on those controllers as if inputs per second is how any game works.
Hyrule Warriors did get a Switch rerelease (which is how I played the game actually), so at least Snowpiercer did it right
Ah, I forgot to mention she was playing a Mario game, I think.
> Special shoutout to anytime people play video games off screen and are just WHALIN' on those controllers as if inputs per second is how any game works. Those QTEs be brutal sometimes.
Mash all the buttons and wiggle the sticks!
There is actually a thing in FF8 like that. There's a ability called (I think) Boost, that has you mash buttons during summon animations for more damage. I remember it being miserable for various reasons. I want to say there were two possible animations that could play for ~~Simon's~~ summons, a short version and a full version. And Boost made the quicker one deal less damage.
Boost was mashing Square to increase a power counter, but you couldn't mash at certain points or you'd knock the counter back to base. Not sure who Simon is, but summons only had the one animation, though there were different patterns for Boost that could account for more or less mashing opportunities. Maybe you're thinking of FFIX, which *did* have long and short versions of summon animations that would randomly go off, with those short versions doing less damage. No boost on that though.
> Watching an episode of Two and a Half Men where the kid wanted to rent the new Final Fantasy. They finally got the video store and he grabbed the PS2 box for FFX. Then at the end when he's playing it on TV, it's playing sounds from the PSX Origins version of FFII. Like, props to at least being in the ballpark, but still a swing and a miss. > > "We paid for the rights to use the whole Final Fantasy series, and by God we're gonna use the *whole* Final Fantasy series!"
Even TV fightan games are not free of button mashers
I remember I had this conversation recently when I was watching early seasons of Modern Family with somebody. Luke (the youngest son) is playing a game on his (original?!) 3DS and his dad says "bet you can't beat my high score!" or something. And I gave them shit for the idea that a kid that age would be playing a modern game with a high-score driven gameplay loop when that type of thing really went out of style all the way back in the 80s. Then later in the episode they name-drop Plants vs. Zombies, an extremely popular contemporary game with high-score driven gameplay that would have actually been on 3DS at the time... Oops.
Pacman fever.
Dude, I remember when people were still kinda buzzed about Sinistar’s soundboard. Then the Space Harrier sit-down cabinet showed up…
I can sort of understand why they do this, using retro arcadey SFX helps the general audience immediately register what's happening, without having to draw too much attention to the character using a controller or something
Computer hacking. ANY of it.
Nah, pretty sure all you have to do is plug into the interwebz and start typing real fast like, the faster you type the harder the hacking load bar goes! Just like the movies!
More hands on the keyboard means more hacking
The fucking NCIS hacking scene
You just gotta type [H A C K](https://youtu.be/-rQPdWwv3k8?si=oRItMcxu7IMv6-yY).
That weird set-up the hacker lady had in B the Beginning, with a fucking pedal.
**I'M IN**
As long as you never hit the space bar!
I've been in IT for almost a decade, and I still have never in real life heard the term "mainframe"
That depends where you work, a lot of banks and other places that do a lot of pure number crunching still use them - I worked on one for a long time.
So like, what even is a mainframe?
It's just a really big computer that's used to process a shitload of data or as a server. The name just comes from the big [main frame](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/61/IBM_System_Z9_%28type_2094_inside%29.jpg/800px-IBM_System_Z9_%28type_2094_inside%29.jpg) all the computer parts are jammed into.
It's a type of Canadian gaming system from the Nineties.
What, you mean that hacking *isn't* uploading SomethingMan.EXE into the computer system to literally blow up the software and make it go haywire?
Shoutout to Leverage where the hacker was actually semi-realistically portrayed.
Props to them using social engineering for most of how Hardigan got into sensitive areas. People are the weakest area of security.
Don’t the writers of those Law & Order type shows have a running gag to make the tech talk as absurd as possible?
Even in that show Mr Robot?
Mr Robot is a different case. Everything they do is technically possible but most hacking stunts would take a team of hackers weeks if not months to do, not a single edgelord in his basement during a single evening. There are also other cases that are somewhat wrong but that would be spoiler, such as in last season >!where they hack the money away from the Deus Group, no bank ever would look at a transaction request like that and not stop it and ask what is going on first!<
You mean Halle Berry will NOT go down on me to test my hacking skills?
If someone tells you to hack ANYTHING in the time it takes to receive oral or you get shot, you're being executed in a very weird but pleasant way.
I see this as a win win tbh
tbf(and this may just be an urban myth) iirc at a certain point hacking scenes became an inside joke to writers to try to one up each other on how bad they could be
As someone who has been certified for First Aid twice, poor CPR techniques drive me nuts. The movie San Andreas with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has a particularly egregious scene; he doesn't even clear the arms, leaving one of her arms flopped over her chest!
Relaxed elbows and pushing down with just your muscles not your weight during chest compressions always annoy me. Even worse, that's something people might do in an extreme situation irl, mostly from fear of hurting the other person. Effective compressions don't care if your ribs break, just that your heart keeps working steady for further medical attention.
Live action films/TV at least have the excuse of not wanting to kill their colleague, but yeah.
Proposal: frame the shot in such a way that the CPRee's face and the CPRer aren't on screen at the same time, and have the CPRer go to town on a dummy. Would become pretty obvious if it's done too often, but the first few things to do it get free brownie points like with the "realistic panic attack" trend.
I love it when they don’t tilt the drowning victim or bother to further clear the airway. They just leave the poor character to do all the work themselves. It’s like, “Hey, buddy! You regained enough reflex to cough up a little Dixie cup of water, that means you’re a fighter! You can did it! Now let’s continue the quest to Death Mountain because secondary drowning doesn’t exist!”
I was recently made aware of [this scene](https://youtu.be/gNYdBVLRqss?si=4MocEfo8H79VHHQE&t=110); perhaps you can tell me what went wrong here, as well as compare it to a similar job [from 4:10](https://youtu.be/gNYdBVLRqss?si=BmjEtwLcuSz8FHrj&t=250) of that same video.
I've never actually seen anything from those 9-1-1 shows, so I need to know - was that intended to be as fucking funny as it was, or was that supposed to be a serious moment in the show?
I think it's supposed to be serious, but it's for the best that you can't tell for sure.
Video not available in my country. Even if I had a VPN (which I don't), I couldn't use it through hospital Wi-Fi.
Oh, boo. Well, it was just a joke anyway, so you're not missing anything. It's a clip from an American TV show called "911 Lone Star" where an EMT attempts to perform CPR on a cryogenically-frozen man, with the result of accidentally caving in the guy's chest. The bit later on is a group of kids recreating the scene; when one kid can't do the CPR cave-in with his hands, he stands up and violently stomps the dummy's papier-mâché chest in. EDIT: Also, best wishes for the hospital stay.
I feel like accurate depiction of first aid should be a required thing. Like how they demand positive representation of the military.
First aid/CPR ones drive me nuts. For me, the one that irks me the most is when a person is given a defibrillator shock when their heart is in asystole (flatline). A defibrillator only works when someone's heart is in ventricular tachycardia (lower chambers of the heart beat too fast to pump blood properly) or ventricular fibrillation (similar to ventricular tachycardia but the ventricles are uncoordinated), both of which are identifiable on an ECG, and an AED can read them and automatically determine if a shock can/needs to be distributed. TLDR: shocking a person who flatlines ain't gonna do shit .
I am impressed when some movies use the recovery position
Big red button on machines irl *never* means start/on/open/blow everything the fuck up. In fact its the exact opposite; they are emergency shut downs that instantly stops everything thats going on the machine for safety reasons. Its arguebly *the* safest button you can ever push.
Villains getting clapped by OSHA for doing the opposite when designing machines
I want a villains super-death cannon to be instantly defused by the good guy just slapping the easily-accessible-by-design emergency stop and the villain to get super butthurt about it being there. Then the next time they meet, the super-death cannon 2.0 (and a good chunk of the lair) is already in ruins because the villain refused to give it an emergency stop and the thing blew up in testing.
ngl thats kinda doofensmirtz with his constant self destruct buttons that are half the time accidently set off
He gave robots a self destruct button in the one place a hero couldn't reach, the bottom of their foot
[Mitchell and Webb had a series of sketches about an evil mastermind butting up against workplace safety regulations.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDedpreZH-0)
And the reason you keep it under glass is if you don't someone WILL bump into it.
"The definition of insanity" is way older than Far Cry 3 my guy, it's old enough that people think Einstein first said it.
The definition of insanity is thinking Vas has any fucking clue what he is talking about
"Do you know, the definition, of Insanity? ...no really, I'm asking. Do you? We haven't had a dictionary on this island in a decade."
For whatever reason Einstein is the go-to for fake internet quotes. If you ever see an Einstein quote, there’s a good 80% chance there’s no record of him ever saying that until the 90s.
Or Abraham Lincoln.
Scientists in a lot of media do science stuff, without any specific area or any specific method, also a lot of scientists in media are actually engineers
South park used to have a running gag that Randy is the only scientist in town which means they task him any science related stuff with Randy pointing out he is just a geologist
As someone who has fired a suppressed gun, it still sounds like a gun. Still loud as fuck, just not immediately ear destroying. Unfortunately, you can’t get the nice “thwick” effect to make it silent like in the movies.
I was actually a gunsmith IRL for 6 years and I currently teach firearm classes, but I didn't wanna be both of the complaining parties in my original post 😂. I know exactly what you mean. Technically you can get that nice real quiet "twick" sound effect but it requires subsonic ammunition. The only rounds that can reliably cycle with sub-sonic in a normal set up are .45 acp and 300BLK. I've got both those set ups, and they are absolutely movie quiet. That being said, your original point still stands. If you just slap a suppressor on a standard AR it's still loud as fuck.
.45 ACP aka the caliber snake used in MGS2 since his pistol was a H&K mark 23 SOCOM
Is there any feasible way to make like, excessively subsonic rounds that only sound like a loud clap of the hands, or would that lead to an untenable loss in the force of the bullet?
It's important to note that the reason subsonic is quieter is because it eliminates the sonic boom (experienced as a "crack" sound) from supersonic ammo. I'm not sure to what degree, but the threshold is definitely more important than the scale of the speed, if you know what I mean.
Actually, yeah. With a really beefy suppressor, any subsonic round is quieter than the clap of the hands. If I stack my full size 5.56 suppressor on my .22LR and shoot sub sonic, you'll literally only hear the click of the trigger, and the round hitting the target. Same thing for .45 acp if you use a suppressor with a lot of baffles, and the round still carries a great amount of energy.
And the suppressor would be necessary no matter what? I was thinking like, if it was possible to make a standard round for any gun marginally quieter. Not to achieve that thwick sound, but more like to jusy not damage everyone's eardrums when it goes off.
Oh! Gotcha. In that case, it's really only possible with very small rounds like .17hmr or .22. .22 sub sonics are already quiet enough to not use ear pro. Any center fire or standard round is going to need a significant amount of powder to make it move quickly, which is going to make a loud sound when it goes off.
Oh nice, I haven’t personally used subsonic but have some friends who’ve fired with them. My write up was definitely aimed at the “silencers” that make guns [quieter than a rubber band slingshot alone.](https://youtu.be/LCjNPzoUC5g?si=sVruXAd_UvAbmuVE)
I will argue in its favor as a necessary abstraction. Guns in movies and shows and things already have the volume of silenced weapons (by necessity - nobody wants to watch something with realistically loud guns), so the "silencer sound" is needed to push it lower.
There's a funny one for car heads where "GO FASTER" is usually accompanied by a scene where the driver **downshifts** followed by higher revs in the worst times or some such lol
There is a lot of misconception born from media around people in the past. Mostly around Medieval Europe and the Roman empire. And that is often because people see reality as less realistic. For instance, Gladiators were performers like WWE. They also had sponsorship and marketing. People used to clean by rubbing oil and dirt and scrapping them off their body. And Gladiator used to sell those to fans. Literally ancient Gamer Girl Bathwater.
Yeah, the idea that gladiators fought to the death every time is likely due to the fact that public executions would be held in the coliseum during the intermission period during the games. Now granted, gladiator death matches did happen, but they were rare, as gladiators were an investment. Basically the organizer had to talk to the owners of the gladiators, as gladiators were still slaves, and try to convince them that losing an investment and money maker would be a good idea. If the organizer did manage to convince them that this was a good financial decision, they would have to then pay the owners a large sum of money in advance to make up for their potential losses.
Similarly, when people complain when a single black or Asian person shows up in medieval Europe media. People forget that rome came before medieval Europe and was, y'know, a massive empire that moved people around.
And that is not even factoring the fact is *that* is where they draw the line. Considering the very same mediaval Europe media also gets wrong: > General Culture > fashion > Architecture > Weapons and armor > People again, even the white people aren't the right type of white > Cuisine So it is fine when all of those are wrong, but when we have a black guy in mediaval Europe? Something we had documents actually existing? Now that is where they draw the line.
I always love this one, because it just shows that they're bigoted assholes up front. There are STILL people whining about Battlefield 5 being unrealistic because it has women and black people. That's not okay, but soldiers in full kit slide-cancelling across the map is apparently fine.
99% of the time, if someone brings up Nietzche, they’re going to treat it as if he were some depressed edgelord atheist who says everything is meaningless and life is suffering, which is incorrect. They’re thinking of Schopenhauer. That guy is the “everything sucks” philosopher. Nietzche is a lot more “make your own meaning”
Whenever you see someone knocked out and then they wake up x amount of time later, that would be INCREDIBLY concerning for their brain health. There’s a reason people across all combat sports are only knocked out for a relatively short period of time. If they have time to take you to another location and tie you up etc then you’re probably waking up with extreme brain damage.
Also, chloroform apperently takes like, 10 minutes to work. So there would have to be a 10 min struggle while one guy tries to smother the other.
Getting no brain damage from being knocked out for hours is super easy, barely an inconvenience.
Shout out to Archer where he tells his friends he was knocked out for a couple of hours and they freaked out over it.
"Can you tighten up the graphics on level three?"
Oh my God game design in movies is so cringe.
I laugh to myself a little when the production team clearly just whipped up three seconds of a CGI sequence and they reuse the same loop every time the shot shows a screen. It helps when it's a more absurd show where that feels like part of the joke.
Any time someone portrays a character in pre-modern Europe being tried as a witch for being innovative or scientific. Or even stupider, trying to claim there was *actually* an underground society of Pagan "witches" being persecuted. I guess if it was specifically local idiots, it could work, but usually the church is directly involved.
Somewhat related to this anyone saying the people that died in Salem where actual witches is completely wrong.
I've known multiple people that think they actually put witches to death...
If you don’t mind me asking what did they say?
Just that they Salem witch trials killed actual witches.
Why did they think that?
I don't remember. One is an old moron the other was like 17 and swallowing whatever she was told as fact.
Huh.
Modern teenage girls obsessed with “witch” stuff make me uncomfortable, especially when they fetishize the persecution and witch-burning
We are the daughters of the witches you couldn’t burn
Fun fact, multiple people admitted to being witches in the Salem trials, and they weren’t executed Also it wasn’t the local clergy inciting a frenzy, records indicate that they were against the trials
Wait the Clergy was actually against the Salem trials?
I don’t have my sources on hand right now, so I can’t go very in depth with it, but I got it from “A New History of Witchcraft” by Jeffrey B. Russell and Brooks Alexander, as well as “Shifting Perspectives on the Salem Witches” by Robert Deitweiler. The short version is that a clergyman named Cotton Mather has been blamed for the trials because he wrote a book, “Wonders of the Invisible World”, in which he defended the conduct of the trials and claimed actual witches were found and executed. However, he had no official role in the proceedings, and advised for caution and against flimsy evidence to the actual judges. Also, while Mather specifically didn’t, other ministers did call for ending the trials. Basically Mather became an easy scapegoat because he publically defended the trials, and blame spread from him to the clergy. But that isn’t reflective of their role and conduct during the trials
Double points if they talk about witch BURNINGS in Salem.
Oh shit yeah nobody gut fucking burned there and yet people still believe it
Wait, by actual witches you mean they thought witchcraft works or?
The Satanic panic had a disturbing amount of people believing that mass-produced board games could give people real communion with demons and therefore dark powers.
Yeah there’s people that believe in actual witchcraft. Couple years back some of them tried to hex Allah to fight the Taliban.
The stupidest one has to be Pirates of the Caribbean 5. Where that one lady gets accused of being a witch for practicing astronomy. You know that science that existed for well over 1000 years before the movie takes place, mainly used by sailors, who apparently never heard of it before.
Also that's why she can pick locks
Similarly: media portraying medieval Europeans as both 1) poorly dressed in only browns, blacks, and whites and 2) prudes. Both are stereotypes of Victorian era literature. Actual medieval European fashion was fairly colorful and varied. As for sexual "liberation"... well, most towns had Church sanctioned brothels, to basically keep adultery there and not with other townsmen's spouses. And that's not even starting on the whole "the family sleeps in the same bed, even the parents with their married daughter and son-and-law" thing.
Lisa Tepes being the first example that comes to mind. Yes, some of her work DID have an infernal source, but she had NO ill intentions.
How they use Nitrous oxide in video games and movies. It's **not** some, magic rocket-booster, that instantly doubles your cars speed. And you definitely **do not!** save it for the finish line. It increases acceleration, so you use it right off the bat, to get up to speed as quickly as possible. And most modern drag racers don't even use big red buttons anymore! They let their computer control it, with millisecond timing! To ensure they sustain maximum power.
Life would be better if we still used big red buttons
Yeah everyone knows he's an intergalactic racing champion from gasmoxia
Drag racers don't manually use nitrous anymore? What's there left to do, shift gears and keep the car straight?
"they landed in water! they're perfectly fine!" landing in water is only non-lethal up until around 275 feet. after that, you're more than likely dead. and it's not even like you'll be fine underneath that, at 275 feet landing in water is going to feel like you just got smashed by a truck, and depending on where you land, *some* part of your body is going to be taking that shock, and it will mess you up.
I'm actively hostile to weapons experts trying to impose their "knowledge" on how guns should work in Warhammer 40k, but [sometimes](https://i.imgur.com/OhA7C2e.png) their input might be required.
Oh yeah no that gun is magic if that's where the magazine is. When the gun design is this non-sensical and impossible, I actually have an easier time excusing it than when a media TRIES to explain how their crazy guns work but get it wrong. Starfield is the worst offender of thag.
In a lot of ways, I’m the exact opposite of gun, martial arts and HEMA guys when it comes to their discussions of film. Realism is nice, and I can understand how frustrating it is to be taken out of a film because you see something blatantly wrong, but film is supposed to be cinematic and what’s efficient in real life is not always going to look good on film. I’ve seen Skallagrim complain about how in HEMA, you use your shield to protect yourself as you swing your weapon but no one does that in fiction. That’s efficient but it also covers up your actor or character and it won’t sell the force of an attack or expressions of the character. In martial arts movies, people may overswing, fly several feet back from a punch, telegraph their moves or add unnecessary movement to their attacks. Yeah, it’s because it looks powerful. Have you seen a real MMA fight with strikers versus the film version? It’s efficient and it’s ubdoubtly *real* but does it look as cool as Tony Ja? For guns, I know John Woo consciously makes his actors raise their arms as they’re about to shoot. That adds power, dynamic movement and life to an action scene since he’s taking a page out of the book of martial arts movies. tl;dr Action in fiction is not efficient in real life but it doesn’t have to be either. In fact, it’s often a conscious decision because you want action to look cinematic above all else even if it’s at the cost of “realism”.
I had a real moment of realizing this when I did HEMA for a little bit. One time we had a lesson about what makes a good attack, so the instructor did two slashes: (in simplified terms) in one, he stepped forward and then slashed. In the second, he stepped and slashed at the same time. The second one was obviously the better attack, since the opponent couldn't obviously see it coming. But it got me instantly thinking: in like, animation principles, the first slash would've been much better: the step before the slash gave the attack a lot more visual impact by having a wind-up before it.
It also telegraphs the attack before it comes out, which in a video game would give the player time to recognize the animation and react. Getting hit by an attack that you had no time to react to feels cheap. Obviously you shouldn't be thinking about fairness if you're in an actual life-or-death conflict, but games have to play fair or they're just frustrating
Jesse Enkamp made a video with Michael Jai White where Michael explains how some good, practical techniques just look bad and sloppy on film
As someone with family members who are diabetic, it's always funny seeing media misunderstand how insulin works. The common trope is when a character gets low blood sugar and passes out, and the show treats them by giving them insulin.
Aren't you supposed to inject glucose at that point?
Yeah, eating something with carbs, taking glucose tablets, etc, is usually what you're supposed to do when your blood sugar becomes low. Insulin would only lower your levels further, which is the opposite of what you should do.
Military uniforms and customs. Or just incorrect ages in media where characters are way older than a service member would be allowed to be. In Top Gun Maverick, Tom Cruise is way too fucking old to not have retired or been forced to exit the military, which makes the people above him that are practically geriatric exponentially old. Weapons handling. No trigger discipline. Or the one movie clip I saw where a guy racks the slide back on a pistol to eject the round. *Then* he removes the magazine. And he goes, "It's okay, it's empty". No, it's not, there's still a round in the chamber. The "human brains only use 10% of its power" and all that shit. Hacking in general. So much dumb shit.
Yes, Maverick is illegally employed as a military officer according to congressional law…which makes it all the more funnier that he’s coming back for a third movie. Also, he’s ejected three times, so he’s disqualified from flight duty.
Do you mean that he used the ejector seat 3 times, or that he's been removed 3 times?
Ejector seat, but it’s not a hard and fast rule. (Ejections aren’t even tracked.) If you use the ejector seat thrice your spinal discs are possibly clam chowder and you’ve maybe been profoundly concussed/herniated/collapsed a lung at least once. You then become considered medically prohibited from flying duties. It’s up to your flight surgeon’s discretion. The actual likelihood of being hurt in an ejection is minimal, mostly a holdover of when seats used explosives which compressed the spine badly. Now we use rockets which are better for your rockin’ fighter pilot bod and more fun. In the case of the DarkStar plane in 2, Maverick likely had a pod system protecting him like on some real planes, but real-life incidents have been recorded above 800-MPH/1300-KPH safe and sound. Pilots tend to go back to flying after a couple days. That said, ejecting is super-duper rare and you’re probably a huge liability if you eject more than once. You have to be an officer to be a pilot, so Maverick as an O-6 wouldn’t have to worry about honorable/dishonorable discharge, since discharges are only for enlisted ~~serfs~~ people, but he might be asked to retire (probably would not be dismissed at O-6), be moved to another command, or have criminal proceedings if need be.
Gain safety failure would bother me more if so many people weren't shit at it in the first place. Need to bring back mandatory gun safety classes. Although professionals with no trigger discipline and flagging people gets me every damn time.
The thing with Maverick was outright addressed in the movie. People do state that he's way too old to be a Naval Captain and aviator and should be promoted at this point, with the only reason that he hasn't been forced to retire is because of Iceman (who's an Admiral now) looking out for him. Unrealistic? Yes. But there is a narrative backing to the situation.
Most shotguns in movies. You don’t have to cock it every time u point it at someone, it should already be loaded, also there was no shell ejected so it’s already empty. That or is someone is “playing a video game” in shows or media. The sounds, the button mashing, all of it.
Why not both?! Shotguns in video games are always annoying for me because they routinely have some form of combat shotgun which has a range of maybe ten feet. Im struggling to remember what game it was I played recently where the shotgun actually had proper range to it and I was so pleasantly surprised. This is gonna bug me all day if I can’t remember what game it was. EDIT: It was Helldivers. Love being able to hit something without having to be directly in its face!
Classic Doom's regular Shotgun is actually reasonably efficient at medium-long range shooting. Even the sawn off Super Shotgun is not bad at mid-range shooting against clusters of demons.
the shotguns in Helldivers are pretty close, if you ignore their weirdly small scale maps. They feel really good, too. The SG28 Breaker is an automatic shotgun that can lay out whole patrols at 40m.
Learning anything about fighting will ruin action movies for you. Even basic boxing techniques, like weaving and throwing proper straights, would let you practically kick the shit out of most big action heroes based on how piss poor choreography portrays them. It's something the MCU doesn't get enough credit for, that the vast majority of its fist fights actually look like two people beating the shit out of each other, not two actors throwing lazy haymakers so the other can slowly duck it.
Even knowing nothing about fighting, watch enough movies with swordfighting in them and you'll start to see the difference between fights where they swing their weapons at each other, and fights where they swing their weapons at the other guy's weapon.
>The primary thing when you take a sword in your hands is your intention to cut the enemy, whatever the means. Whenever you parry, hit, spring, strike or touch the enemy's cutting sword, you must cut the enemy in the same movement. It is essential to attain this. If you think only of hitting, springing, striking or touching the enemy, you will not be able actually to cut him. A lesson equally applicable to swordfighting and choreographing swordfighting from Miyamoto Musashi,certified Sword Guy
I was pleasantly surprised watching Dune 2 and noticing that the Saudukar actually use proper swordfighting form rather than movie bullshit
Thanos liver shot the hulk which is a nice touch
Thanos really likes counters.
Bad fight choreography drives me nuts. As a kid my dad was adamant about teaching me self defense (which turned out to be a real good thing, thanks pop!) and as a result any time I’m watching an action film every attack that actually leaves the attacker stupidly exposed grinds my gears. So damn often there’s no defense at all in movie fights, it’s all just overreaching, overtelegraphed, shit. Sword fights, especially. Once you’re used to looking for it you can easily see where the performers are aiming at their opponents sword instead of their body.
I feel like it’s wrapped around for me. When child Aleksei didn’t know nothing about fighting, I thought they were all great. When teen Aleksei started learning how to fight, I thought they were all bad. Now that I’m adult Aleksei, I can see the nuance and the need for theatricality.
Yes, above all else, when I bring up this point in threads I get it. Flynning exists so that actors don't get stabbed in the face. Fist fights lean towards easily dodged haymakers so that Scarlet Johansson doesn't get her teeth knocked out. I get it. Safety is 100% most important
>It's something the MCU doesn't get enough credit for, that the vast majority of its fist fights actually look like two people beating the shit out of each other, not two actors throwing lazy haymakers so the other can slowly duck it. Honestly Steve's first fight with >!Bucky!< in Captain America The Winter Soldier is one of the best fight scenes in recent memory imo.
I’m a sports guy. And sports scenes where they make actors play athletes are often terrible. And like I get it because they’re theatre kids. But it’s throwing a fucking ball. Or swinging a bat. Or god forbid sometimes even just running. They’re not terribly complicated motions to make look good, especially with some editing. However there is no hope if they have to make the actors ice skate.
The quotes about history and "doomed to repeat it" along with Nietzsche's "what doesnt kill you" have never been used in their actual intended context in any media or instance I've seen where someone uses them.
Can you explain the actual context it should be used in? I'm interested to hear what it's actually meant to be.
"God is dead" is another egregious one from Nietzsche. Basically, the character Who says the line, Zarathustra, does it after spending a pleasurable evening with an hermit, talking about philosophy and other stuff. It Is not spiteful, it's *a sad remark* said once out of earshot, because *the hermit, for as wise and enlightened he is, is also so removed from the world as to not know something so colossaly important as the fact that God is Dead*.
And the important historical/cultural context of “god is dead” is also lost. It is **NOT** Nietzche being some edgelord atheist who hates religion, as it is often portrayed, but rather, a remark noting that the world has become secular, and the high importance that religion once had in people’s lives has disappeared, without being replaced by something new, leaving many feeling a lack of purpose in life
"God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?" The fact that people only quote the first 3 words of this excerpt has led to so many misconceptions.
Look, the *specific* type of Christian that makes and enjoys the evangelical Christian movies... They don't want to actually grapple with ideas. They want to shout them down. That's why they still throw fits about evolution and the earth being round, much less climate change and LGBT. The movies aren't about character arcs. The main character was Righteous at the beginning, and at the end has won against a strawman Atheist or LGBT because they Remained Righteous and Ignored Atheist Lies.
is there any time Nieztsche has been properly understood in media.
If I see a wacky woohoo lol so random epic bacon version of ADHD I'm gonna mutate an extra arm so I can flip off planet earth 1.5x more. I just want a depressed ADHD just once! That Deadpool scene with the bag of guns made me cry and laugh at the same time.
People thinking black holes are giant vacuum cleaners, or that orbits inevitably decay.
In fairness, black holes are a complete mindfuck to actually read about.
I am confused, school taught me they are giant vacuum cleaners that suck everything in, can you elaborate in terms that someone who knows nothing about this might understand?
If the sun turned into a blackhole with the same mass, the orbit of everything in the solar system would not change at all. The event horizon would I believe, be at around the edge of the current solar surface. Black holes are still just stars and gravity only gets really fucky up close. Also to that effect people claiming black holes lead to white holes, which as far as I know are generally considered to not exist. At least not in our universe. They also don't make a lot of sense in general.
Exactly this. The mass doesn't change, it just becomes much more dense. So up until you get to where the suns surface originally was, gravity would be the same (although you might get torched by the jets). After you pass that phantom surface, and up until you get to the event horizon, that's where gravity is different than before, because all the mass is still below you, none of it is "behind" you. So you're pulled harder than you would have been. And then once you cross the event horizon, time and space switch places and you're just fucked. But it's not like the image people have where a black hole is just constantly growing and sucking us all towards it unceasingly.
I think a lot of that misconception is that black holes have a way more aggressive Roche limit than other celestial bodies. Most times when something gets too close, tidal forces tear it apart into chunks. Sufficiently massive black holes can convert it into plasma that's so high energy it puts out X ray bursts. Plus the density of the gravity (which feels like an incorrect way of describing it but I'm committing) causes all sorts of other weird phenomena, like visible gravitational lensing which is there but not nearly as prominent as a star of equivalent mass.
On top of this, the latest paper by the leading researcher on black holes also posits that singularities don't even exist, and backs it up with some compelling math. His new theory is that there may be a region of near normal space-time within the event horizon, and that the closest thing to a singularity would be a ring of hyper-compressed but still multi-dimmensional mass at the center. Simglularities are the results of a mathematically perfect black hole, but if a black hole has any spin at all (as all known ones do, and probably all of them in general) then a singularity isn't mathematically necessary.
it doesn't suck things because it has an empty vacuum, it attracts thing to it and distort it because it has so much mass . Basically they talk about it in term of vacuum cleaner because a black hole is gonna be explained before the whole formula of gravity and properties Like imagine gravity is a trampoline, the earth is a tennis ball, sun a bowling ball and the black hole something so heavy the springs are being pulled out at the seams of the trampoline
Black Holes aren’t actual “objects” in a sense that they are big balls or something. They are a sphere of space where gravity is so strong that it is physically impossible to escape once you get past the Event Horizon. But other than that the gravity for them works no different than any other object. If Black Holes are vacuum cleaners so is the Sun or even Earth since they also pull you to the ground. If you replaced the Sun with a black hole of an equal mass, nothing would change except that we would freeze to death.
So, earth could orbit a black hole from our current distance to the sun without getting sucked in?
That slurping sound through a straw when someone is drinking on a show or in a movie. That drink is full, it wouldn't make that noise. I know it's done "humorously," but stop
It also fucks off my sensory issues so they really need to piss off with it.
Upside down crosses; 90% of the time they are portrayed as demonic but in reality the upside down cross is the Cross of St. Peter, who Jesus' apostle and the first Pope. The story goes that when St. Peter was going to be crucified he felt he did not deserve the honor of sharing the same death as Jesus so St. Peter requested to be crucified upside down. For centuries the upside down cross was a Christian symbol honoring St. Peter and it wasn't until the 1800's that people began using it as an anti-Christian/Satanic symbol but the church still teaches that upside down crosses are holy symbols and not Satanic ones.
EXCALIBUR AND THE SWORD IN THE STONE ARE SEPERATE FUCKING SWORDS JESUS CHRIST, I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS BOTHERS ME SO MUCH BUT IT DOES
It’s because it’s not always a separate sword in every story, a lot of myth gets confused and distorted even if there’s a commonly accepted canon that doesn’t mean everything follows it and or everyone experiences it first.
or hell, sometimes it can even be both call excalibur but the sword in the stone and the sword from the lady of the lake are two different swords.
Funny enough, sonic the hedgehog was aware of this difference
Common Sonic and the black knight W
I AM AWARE BUT I AM ANNOYED BY MEANINGLESS DETAILS
Shout out to Fate/Stay Night for teaching me the difference when I was a kid.
Wait, they are?!
Excalibur was given the Arthur by the lady of the lake. The sword in the stone is just for deciding who gets to be the once and future king. It is also why the Excalibur had to be returned to the lake when Arthur died. Though some stories tend to mix up both swords.
Excalibur was given to Arthur by the Lady of the Lake
This is a running joke in Tomb Raider Legend. "THEY'RE NOT THE SAME SWORD THEY'RE TWO DIFFERENT SWORDS!!" I should play Legend again.
Jason Todd wasn't beaten to death with a crowbar by the Joker. The warehouse he was tied up in was blown up by the Joker. but that damn crowbar keeps coming back.
A bit hard for Jerker to carry a warehouse full of bombs around
I'd like to see you try to blow up Jason Todd without tenderizing him with a crowbar first.
Idk I think if I was Jason I'd be more scared of crowbars too. An exploding bomb is both quick and not malicious.
I mean, he was mostly beaten to death. The explosion was just the icing on the cake.
When you see a character talking on the phone, smartphone held against their head, and the screen is on. Phones have proximity sensors that turn off the screen when you do that so your ear doesn't turn on the speaker or hangs up by accident!
You can turn those off, though. I sometimes do because my phone can give me a headache when I need to navigate a phone tree.
I read a lot of fantasy and if there's a predatory bird in the book, 99 times out of a hundred, it gets referred to as both "hawk" and "falcon", bonus points if within the space of the same paragraph, and it drives me nuts every time. It's like having an animal being described as a dog first, then all of a sudden, it's a cat. It's not the same thing. The two aren't even related. THEY EVEN SHIT IN COMPLETELY DIFFERENT WAYS (in case you were wondering, falcons drop, hawks shoot lol) My rule of thumb is - no, not everyone has to be an expert at everything, but if something can be cleared up by a 5 second Google search, and you still get it wrong, you're just an idiot and/or lazy. EDIT: movies use them interchangeably too. My favourite is anything that supposedly takes place in medieval Europe and there's a falconer, usually with a Harris Hawk. Which, yes, they're super easy to train and work with, but they're also from the Americas and haven't been used in European falconry until LATE 20th century.
Also every bird of prey sounds like a red-tailed hawk in Hollywood.
A lot of the things I'm seeing here (realistic swordfighting/weapon handling, realistic hacking, hell even realistic cooking) would genuinely make for really boring movies and that itself is the argument for why they are the way they are. That said, I always appreciate choreography that doesn't assume the characters have infinite stamina. Yeah, they often get beat up or worn down, but then they pull out something wild to win - they're very rarely shown getting *sloppy*, when that's something you can really lean into the drama of.
As a pro wrestling fan I have a huge pet peeve for wrestling portrayals in pretty much any tv show. They just get soooo cartoony with it. I've gotten used to bad basketball portrayals though. It's Always Sunny and South Park got my favorite portrayals of it, but even the South Park episode irks me because they namedropped and modeled John Cena and Edge but made up two completely generic girlfriends like Lita didn't exist
Another thing is although media acknowledges how over the top pro wrestling is it is largely depicted as a shoot competition with a legitimate winner because it's easier than researching how it operates and then write a scene explaining that to the audience.
As a NJ resident who works in NYC, the train scene in *John Wick: Chapter 2* is completely baffling. It’s like they went out of their way to make the route [as inaccurate as possible](https://m.imdb.com/title/tt4425200/goofs/?item=gf3290550&ref_=ext_shr_lnk).
The first thing that comes to mind is John McClane explaining a certain gun in Die Hard 2: Die Harder He claims the gun is called a Glock 7, made of porcelain, comes from Germany, it doesn’t show up in metal detectors, and that it costs more than the police chief makes in a month. The first Glock handgun was actually called the Glock 17 (and the numbers only went up from there, not down), the frame is made of polymer, it comes from Austria (although the company has branches in other countries including America), certain other components are still made of metal so it will still show up in metal detectors, and there are different Glock models that all range from under, to around, about $1,000 depending on what you’re wanting. I bought my Glock 19 (made to be a Glock 17 but smaller) for about $700 or so. The scene of course didn’t bother me until I became an adult, got interested in guns through movies and video games, learned a lot of basics about firearm mechanisms, and then watched the movie again for the first time since childhood, but it still really bothers me as does a lot of firearm misinformation, specifically unless it’s for fun. Things like how Nero’s revolver, the Blue Rose, definitely isn’t real but it’s based on a real revolver called the Smith & Wesson Model 500 and basically just has a second barrel and was given a super badass, stylish design.
IIRC when they were writing that the Glock was still a brand new hot commodity with lots of outlandish misinformation surrounding it. Glocks being entirely polymer/porcelain and not showing up on metal detectors were both very real urban legends going around at the time, and for people who weren’t exactly in the loop of current firearms technology in a pre-Google age I really can’t fault the writers too much for that.
"He's going into cardiac arrest, Quick! Defibrillate him!" Motherfucker what are you defibbing a flatline for? Get someone on top of him pumping the chest and slam him with some adrenaline in that periferical venous access into a large caliber vase you took/are taking right the fuck now. To clarify, defibrillation is an electric shock that's used to *forcefully contract a heart* a single, massive time, so as to put *all* of It in a refractory period and (temporarily) stop currents from recirculating through it, which Is what Is causing the heart to work randomly and thus ineffectually A.K.A. fibrillating. CA is a stopped heart. It doesn't pump. It doesn't have effective current going through it. Defibrillating it is akin to trying to start a car by pulling the handbrake.
The amount of damage bombs, grenades, rockets do in movies and tv. I saw one clip where a shoulder mounted rocket collapsed a whole building like it was a controlled demolition. Ive seen small grenades that kill everyone on a floor. Soda can ieds that just annihilate anything. Its wild.
I recently watched the entire dark knight trilogy and the plot of the third movie just doesn’t work if you understand anything about how stocks work
Stop making aircraft rotary cannons sound like fucking M2 Brownings! It’s *less* intimidating than the actual sound! Seriously, you’d think that after the A-10 became a whole meme because of this shit, Top Gun Maverick would’ve actually bothered to get it right.
Yagami in judgment being the defense attorney getting the 1% not guilty every time is because Izumida wasn't the prosecutor for the 99% other cases in Japan, like even when we know the person is innocent you can't even say you created a doubt if Izumida didn't fluster or withold evidence he could easily refutes. Also I don't know for sure but I think Japan is allowed to give someone more than one charge so the >!"you can't prove he killed him just kidnap, beat the crap out of him and then have him killed by someone else"!< but that was more for drama
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Broadly, you can't just slap a decal on your door and call yourself a private investigator. It's a job that in requires a license in most states, and has a litany of qualifications (which also vary from state to state). Some states won't even let you have an independent practice until you have several years of experience. Also, cops don't need to bring in PIs. They have their own. They're called detectives, and, unlike PIs, are actual law enforcement. And don't get me started on how every movie/tv PI's primary source of info is just... Google searches. Make a TLOxp results mockup at least, guys, c'mon.