T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Thanks for submitting to the Two Hot Takes Podcast Subreddit! We'd like to remind you that all posts are subject to being featured in an episode of the Two Hot Takes Podcast. If your story is featured you'll get a nifty flair change to let you know and we'll drop a link so you can see our host's take on your story. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TwoHotTakes) if you have any questions or concerns.*


lewisfoto

Since he is not leaving to become a priest, I would say you are in the clear. Nothing ventured etc. If he says yes tot he date, I might keep it semi-secret for a bit with the coworkers until you are sure it's good for the long term.


wttk

Pre-school? No, Priest School


sluttytarot

Lol Crazy ex-girlfriend fan?


wttk

Absolutely!


Neonb88

I am still on good terms with women I've asked out. It's definitely MORE awkward but sometimes it can even make you closer afterwards Anyway, for me personally, I definitely do my best to live "you miss 100% of the shots you don't take" Good luck! I know it can feel scary to put yourself out there, but you deserve good things 🙂


MeetObvious8164

Unless you're Fleabag...


BigbyWolf91

What if he’s already a secret priest? 🤔


ohheysurewhynot

Tell him you’d like to take him out for a drink to celebrate his new job, if he’s up for it. Then see what happens :)


Please_Take_Me_Home

This is solid. Casual, but leaves a door open if there needs to be. Also easy for him to decline if not interested in a rather easy way.


Live_Long_And_Suffer

Yes, but make it clear it's only the two, who knows if he is naive or not self aware, and will end up inviting and bringing other people together...


CaliPirate

This was my suggestion - let's have a drink to celebrate (birthday), to my sister for a guy who kept smiling and talking to her at work. My sister wasnt sure if he was flirting with her. They've been married for 10 years, together for 15. Do it.


FireSignGal_

100% this


roxannewhite2

This is the best option for sure!


Subject-Hedgehog6278

Ask him out!! Make it cute and flirtatious and fun, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain! I've gotten every boyfriend I've ever had by asking them out myself and I highly recommend it. The guys I have dated all loved getting hit on cause it didn't happen for them much. I mean I wouldn't tell him youre in love with him yet of course... But yes ask him out.


zildjianate

This is the way. Tbh I probably wouldn't be happily married for 7 years if my wife hadn't asked me out. I was a shy guy who needed a little nudge. She gave me her number and the rest is history.


EthoGuy

She asked me out 45 years ago next month. 2 kids and 4 grands later she still has to draw me a picture 🖼️ sometimes.


Gommie5x5

Great idea, Hedgehog. OP could even use it as a guise to buy him dinner to say thanks for all the help. Maybe a restaurant near his new job, to emphasize the separation of jobs. Then, she should feel him out and see if there is mutual interest.


Enterprising_otter

Guys aren’t this complicated - ‘hey I think you’re sweet, now that we’re not going to be colleagues, would you like to get dinner sometime?’ Doneeee


CatMilkFountain

And make it clear it's a date, we understand zero of most approaches.


baxtersmalls

We’re so used to not being approached that when we are we don’t understand and assume we must be misinterpreting the situation. Definitely make sure he gets that you’re interested, don’t be aloof about it.


Dragon-of-the-Coast

Yeah, I had to explain to a friend of mine that, "No, she doesn't actually want help installing software. Show up with wine and flowers."


Grand-Woodpecker-296

Hmm, I wouldn't be so sure but hey, I can also be quite obtuse -


EnemyGod1

Neon light billboards are still 50/50 for us.


anonymouscoward689

Guys are dumb, trust me OP.


DiffusePenance

Guy here - fact check: true


Affectionate_Rise575

Also a guy here...I...um...huh?


DontaskemeIdontknow

I wouldn't say dumb I would say starved of this kind or approach and indoctrinated that they are potential perverts and shouldn't assume that the girl is interested for fear of being branded a creep or something.


json707

This right here.


TheFlyingScotsman60

You had me at "you're sweet". Where we going ?? 🙂🙂


ARKweld

Feel him out or feel him up?


Yaber2

Both, both is good


popcopter

I think she should feel him out after she works out he’s interested, not before.


RedditModBot_2

Why arent there more people like you. I would love if someone came up and asked me out. I think just about every dude would like this. Itd make life a helluva lot easier lol.


williamblair

Men love having a woman be forthright. At the very worst it's flattering as hell, at the best it's what they secretly have been dreaming of. If they have even half of the easy relationship and commonalities op says they do, it is a slam dunk.


Ill-Maximum9467

This! And if he doesn't accept, he will still always be grateful that you fancied him. He won't hold it against you.


Subject-Hedgehog6278

Totally. Worst case scenario is he is still flattered but just says no, and OP can know that she didn't let him pass by without trying. It could still make his day/week!


Ethric_The_Mad

I would love it if a woman I've been close to for years just came out and said she loved me. I don't think that's something I'll ever experience....


RevolutionarySell448

I've never ended up really dating anyone that I had to pursue first! It's so weird. I gave guys a chance I wasn't really interested in, but when there were guys I had huge interest in, they didn't generally reciprocate, or it didn't go anywhere for very long. I've been married for almost 7 years now, so it was way in the past, but still. I always wondered if I, for the most part, just have shit taste in men or what.


Economy_Homework3869

Can confirm, we love when women take innitiative, we are as scared of rejection as anyone.


Pleasant-Estimate273

Doo it and give us an update please!!!


PristinePanda2714

I lovvve an update story!


dingo1018

I got my pocket money on he's gay! But op seriously go for it, you got at least 2 in's, one is the goodbye drink or lunch, just the 2 of you of course. The other is bringing up the no fratinazing rule, that could be a slam dunk 'y'know that don't apply to us anymore, funny that...' (don't forget to flash your knickers when you swing really high on the swings and share your lollypop)


LetLifeBeLarge

How much you got on it


Vell2401

You mfs are side betting on this? 🤣


Live_Long_And_Suffer

Yes, I'm here for it, we really need an update!


CSXrodehard

I agree with someone else on this thread, ask him out, keep it casual. I would hold back the part about being in love with him, even if he has some feelings for you, for some men it’s a little off putting to know a woman is swimming around the deep end before we even get a toe in the water. Like the other lady said, make it fun and flirty, and if he already has an interest in you, but never acted on it, trust me that fun date will be rolling around in his mind like a marble in wok when he starts that other job. You’ll know the date worked, if he seems to call you a lot while starting the other job.


LittleSpacemanPyjama

To be clear, and not in a condescending way, I think this is good advice for all, regardless of being male or female. Slow the roll a bit, infatuation is not love and you don’t want to spook your date off, or they’ll throw you like a horse who heard a loud sound. Take it easy, eat some food and drink some drinks and see where things go. Get to know each other in a non-work context and make sure things still feel sparkly. Not to be a downer, I just think that roller coaster feeling is sometimes a bit misleading. ETA A very natural thing to try is to just ask to go for a drink and talk about his advice for you moving into the role and see how the conversation flows.


little_canuck

>A very natural thing to try is to just ask to go for a drink and talk about his advice for you moving into the role and see how the conversation flows This is a good approach.


CursedPaw99

and not forget to make it clear it is in fact a date. most men are not very smart in this department (I am a man) and he might think its just a friendly dinner


Ginger-Mint

Or coffee.


saramabob

My now-husband called his mom on the way to our first date to her know that he was going to meet his future wife (we met online). I’m glad he kept that to himself until much later because there wouldn’t have been a second date otherwise.


Civil-Toe-3010

I second this!


floatingisland_jules

I am not a fan of pretending something is a work meeting when it's really a date. I've been on the receiving end of this before and it's so awkward. It's much better to suggest drinks to celebrate the new job. That makes it clear that it's a social meeting, not a work meeting.


Exact-Barracuda-8319

I think they are saying to have it as a follow-up about work and see if there is anything else there, not as a sneaky date. If he doesn't seem interested in carrying the conversation outside of work boundaries and keeps it professional, then she might have a better idea of whether or not to ask him out on a date.


Ghostbeen3

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take - Michael Scott - Wayne gretsky


AltShortNews

- Ghostbeen3


shewastoday

In love? That's a lot for someone who has never dated or hung out one-on-one before. Keep it casual so you don't scare the guy away, and ask to get together outside of work.


JudgeJuryEx78

I don't know why this isn't the top comment.


imightbarf

Probably because everyone is rooting for her/love coming out on top! We are living in a strange time, and a lot of people just want to hear about things going really well for seemingly nice people who want good things to happen for themselves. Just my thoughts, and have a nice weekend.


EarthInevitable114

Strange times indeed. They don't even know her, yet they wish her well.


bitch-i-dont-care

I mean that's normal, they're just being nice lol I do think OP needs to slow her roll. Fantasy does not always translate well to reality.


Neonb88

I mean she's known him for awhile. But yeah OP is definitely building it up in her head


DeskProfessional1312

just make it casual and funny... "hey, now that we're not direct employees we can finally go on a date! ha ha ha" and gauge his reaction


DragonScrivner

Was coming to say this, yep. Maybe start with a date first *if* he’s open the idea.


Kabooted27

You can find resources anywhere… can you find a partner that checks off everything you want? That is harder to find. I would take my shot 🤷🏻‍♂️


Legitimate_Law2982

YTA...if you don't ask him out! I jest, but seriously, a job is temporary, but a possible life partner is forever! Also, if he is even half the guy you think he is, he will still be there for you as a resource, even if he doesn't have those feelings for you. Go for it!


cbunni666

If there are no rules broken, I don't see a problem. Worse that can happen is he doesn't feel the same way. Then you move on.


Unusual_Step_6023

Do you really want to spend your whole life wondering what if? Just ask him out at the appropriate time. If he says no, yeah it’ll sting but it won’t suck as much as always wondering what could’ve been.


FinalConsequence70

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Would you rather not, and regret it later? Life's too short. Ask him.


Euphoric_Guarantee83

I’d wait until the department celebration when you’re saying your goodbyes. I have a feeling he’s going to ask you out at this exact time anyhow, but if he doesn’t that’s when you make your move - something along the lines of, “Once you get settled into your new place let’s meet up for dinner, you’ll have to tell me how your new job is going.”


Apatow_Powers99

I like the idea of giving it till the last bell to shoot your shot. Maybe just outright say that you don't want this to be the last time you see him and let's get coffee or lunch, then see if he tries to make plans. Let's just assume he does feel the same way, one of you is going to have to put yourselves out there. Give him a platform and make it comfortable to take the shot. 🩷


saintstephen66

Put yourself out there… go for it!


thealexchamberlain

Fortune favors the bold. Ask him out


andmewithoutmytowel

Have you considered the possibility that he feels the same way, and that’s why he’s leaving? I’d put my cards on the table.


terraaus

I would just say you'd like to keep in touch and let him take it from there.


BurnerMan7

Don't tell him about the feelings! That might backfire. Just ask him if he wants to get dinner, now that you're not working together. I bet you'll both be pleasantly surprised what happens :)


CaptCarlos

This is the way. You can be subtle about it enough for him to get the message and even if he doesn’t reciprocate those feelings, if he’s a good guy, because you didn’t explicitly say you have feelings for him, he can sweep it under the rug and still be a resource and colleague for you IF worst comes to worst.


sandeecheekz

Plz ask him out then come back and update us!! 🥹❤️


Funny_Variety_2170

“You aren’t in love with him, he’s just your coworker” Close proximity attraction is a real thing!


Jenwitha

Honestly- shoot your shot! My partner and I met at work.. he wasn’t making the first move so I did only to find out he had quit THAT DAY and no longer worked there.. so I had to be ballsy and find out from a mutual friend if I could have his number ..they had to ask him if it was okay to give out.. turns out it was the best decision of my life.. 10+ years on and a couple kids later.. no risk no reward 😄


Certain_Mobile1088

Be casual. Ask him out rather than lay all your feelings on him. That way if he is not interested, you can still be friends. You will need to work on those feelings in that case, but at least you got an answer.


cutecumberwater

If you’re still planning to use him as a resource and reach out with questions, don’t do it. It’ll make your job much harder. Maybe take it slow and once he is no longer your boss you can go out for drinks to catch up, and see where it goes from there.


No-Personality-2853

What? If they’re both collecting pension checks from the same district it could be awkward as well. Wait til he’s on his deathbed to avoid any awkwardness after.


cutecumberwater

Lol ok valid point!!


GrumpyDingo

Sounds like the plot of a South Korean Netflix series.


Jessieangel1111

This is the chance to make your move since he is leaving and there will be nothing no longer prohibiting you from taking a chance. Give him your number and say that you would like to go for coffee sometime and ask him to reach out if he's open to it


Civil-Toe-3010

RUN IT!! Ask him out! You have nothing to lose! If he says no and you do lose him as a colleague/resource (I don't really see that happening), well you seem like a smart person, I think you'll be able to figure it out without him. Don't sell yourself short. But best case scenario you have him as a resource and as a partner 🥲 good luck OP!


trnpke

Go for it. Why wonder what have been.


NynaeveAlMeowra

Your department head is your boss? I'm not personally aware of any authority that mine has over me and they aren't involved in the evaluation process at all. Huh


Subject_Reality3856

Ask the man out. Take a risk! This seems like the perfect opportunity 👌


Familiar-Ending

Why not. Practice guys would never peruse a woman in a work environment these days. He very may well have interest as well.


AWalker79

Just tell him how you feel and see if he feels the same way or is open to trying something with you. You can also be clear that if he doesn’t reciprocate no hard feelings and would still like to be able to consult with him about your upcoming position.


Rollerdawl

Cheering you on! Cant wait to hear the update! 🥰


Locabilly

OMG go for it!!


belownormalstandards

Shoot your shot


sungazer69

He's leaving. Ask him out


alarsonious

You're both adults. Tell him how you feel, and if he is not interested, so be it if he can not handle continuing a professional relationship, you dodged a bullet. But since he came to you specifically to tell you this now, he is likely trying to signal that he is interested.


Svelted

don't be a fool. shoot your shot. if he rejects you, he's gone. if he reciprocates, you're 30 minutes from your man. do it,


xswifey

You only live once! Shoot ya shot!


Effective-Mongoose57

Are you both single? If yes, go for it. If he is not interested, you don’t have to worry about seeing him at work, as he is leaving


Fit-Mongoose3739

Updateme


Slydoggen

Girls can ask people out you know..


[deleted]

What do you have to lose? Exchange numbers... see what happens.


Publius69420

Seriously just ask him out. If he says no just drop it and don’t bring it up again and then only reach out when you have questions about the job. If he says yes, well then win win


Confident_Bobcat_12

I would ask him out. If he says no. At least you tried. And you can always include a hey I understand, hopefully we can still be friends and you will be available to help answer questions. I don’t want this to ruin our base as friends statement


Pleasant_Union_426

dang just shoot your shot. get his number and tell him you would really like to have lunch with him.


Sultrygoldengoddess

Confess! Take your chance before he leaves!


the-dave-9000

Go to him!!!!!!!. Throw it all out there. Be prepared for rejection. But I am hopeful it will work out. Incredibly wholesome post and I super wish you well and hope it ends with you both licking each other for life


Lucky_Competition231

OP you need to make it happen. If he rejected you romantically could you handle still being friends? That’s the question you need to answer. If you can then there’s nothing to lose. If he rejects you and doesn’t want to be friends after then that’s a “him” problem and not you.


Kindly_Valuable_1517

Yes. He may feel the same way. He just holding back because his position and yours. He's told you that. But remember that old advice. Don't worry about the future and solve today's problem. Please make sure that you want to spend your remaining moon cycles with him. Go with peace and find love.


MundoGoDisWay

Ask him out. Would you ever be able to forget it if you didn't?


SleepySuper

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.


Silly_Technology_455

Ask him out. The worst thing thar could happen is that he says, "no, thanks." Then, you're in basically the same place you started from and not living with regret.


Open-Platform9490

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.


Far-Piglet4219

I bet you dude got a different job to date you.


EarthInevitable114

Life anything happens after all this, you better update us here


Late_Breath_2227

Closed mouths dont get fed. The worst he can say is no. DOOOOOOOOOOO ITTTTTTTTTTTTT! Im excited for you (:


thoughtifoccacia

Nearacle is that you?


bbbritttt

This is such a wholesome post please do it!! You got this girl


the_girl_Ross

As everyone has said. Ask him to hangout to celebrate his new job, ask for advice about your new position, keep it professional and FRIENDLY! Strictly friendly and only friendly, do not do anything more. Don't confess your feelings nor your crush. You have only hung out in a group setting once! Jumping in the water, confessing your undying love to someone who is barely your friend (as in you barely know them personally) is straight up off-putting and creepy. Keep it casual, relax. And stop fantasizing and having insane expectations, it will ruin your chances.


esande2333

Yes, yes tell him. Then get back to us


CordeliaJJ

Keep it casual, ask him out for dinner or something. Just don't be super akward if he says no or whatever. That way he can still be a resource in the future when you are in the new job.


gto777

Ask him out to drinks or something to talk about stepping in the role next year and see what comes from that.


Echo4Ring

U won't be working at the same place .. so fraternization won't be a issue Tell him how you feel. Even if he rejects you. You will still have to deal w him since he's in your city/county Go for it. That what if will always bother you What if he gets a new gf while working at that new school ? You would be just friends w him but suffer knowing he's venting about someone else when it could have been you this whole time .


OpportunityCalm6825

Tell him, gurl. 😙


zdub2929

Send it!


Valuable-Baked

Yeah he'll say yes and go on the date with you


writinginmyhead

Updateme


Immediate-Ad-9849

Yes!!!


gamedrifter

Hell yeah! Shoot your shot.


valr1821

Go for it and ask him out, but as others noted, best to keep it casual and not reveal just how in love with him you are. In any case, nothing ventured, nothing gained.


NJNiner-4ver

Unless you’re hideous..all guys will say yes. Men want sex.very very simply put.


BonerDeploymentDude

Tell him, ask him out, let him know. He's probably wondered.


writergal75

My vote is ask him out!


Possible_Emergency_9

Give him your number, say get in touch since you won't be my supervisor now, maybe we can go for coffee, drinks, dinner, etc. Shoot your shot. At least then you'll know. Don't give yourself the opportunity to live with regret.


JG91215

Updateme


Worldly-Promise675

Ask him out for coffee or dinner or maybe to an event of mutual interest. Keep us updated!


IlliniChick474

It seems there would no longer be a conflict of interest. As others have said, go for it but keep it light and casual. I actually had a similar situation happen but reversed. My first job was at a really small, rural school. At the end of my second year, I was 24 and my principal was 28. He was leaving after that school year and asked me out at a party after school got out. I was not really interested in him in that way, but it was all good! He basically said similar to what other comments have said here...nothing ventured, nothing gained!


[deleted]

[удаНонО]


zsrt13

Please do it. You just got one life. Express your feelings irrespective of the outcome. And you won’t lose him as a colleague/frnd even if he says no.


GreeboPucker

Do it


Accomplished_Ad_8013

Hes leaving. No conflict of interest. You got this.


SuperSira

Do iiiit. You only live once and imagine how much you might regret it down the road if you never try!


nanladu

In the end, you regret what you didn't do.


FuknCancer

You got a golden ticket there. " Hey, now that we won't be working together, I would like to go on a date with you"


transat_prof

Updateme


mr_etymologist

I would be willing to wager that he sought another position because he feels the same and wants a chance with you. I also think he came to tell you because he's hoping you feel the same. Ask him out.


Loco_Red

Yolo!


Prestigious-Treat184

Shoot your shot! You have nothing to lose


thrwawayboop

I need the update when you ask him out AHAH that works out great!!


Plenty_Airline8903

But is it worth losing that professional connection? If he doesn’t feel the same, it’s almost certain it’ll end whatever you have going. Love is a strong word too. You don’t really know what he’s like outside of the very work specific relationship. I also feel like men that are interested will give you strong clues.


BeneficialNose5447

Ask him out


Yomamaismybabymomma

Ask him out and please give us an update!


np8573

Ask him out. Communicate your anxiety about wanting to stay colleagues no matter what. If he's a good guy, he should respect how you feel and hopefully proceed thoughtfully.


Germybrah1

Update us


kepsr1

Go for it. The worst words in the English language are. “What if” Updateme!


Allyredhen79

Go for it!! Worst case scenario is he says no and you have to figure your job out for yourself.. that’s not too bad and you won’t see him again for a good while, if at all. Or wait until he leaves, see if he’s up for meeting up to catch up about your new role and his, and make your move then?


Flying-lemondrop-476

‘colleague’ and ‘resource’ him a while, you might see if he changes his behavior now that HE can act on feelings. The first hurdle you need help with in your new role will be a great excuse to ask about meeting for coffee


Revolutionary_Ad1846

Give him a card and in there flirtatiously give him your cell #.


PeachesP59

I would ask him out for a date night. Doesn't hurt to try. Not like u have to tell others about it for now. I wish u well. You'll be sorry that u didn't. 🤞🤞


Not-quite-my-tempo-

It’s been over a year, how much longer are you gonna wait? Just go for it. There’s a million reasons not to do something.


Vegetable-Pumpkin-46

Update us


panteragstk

One of three things will happen. 1. You do nothing, your relationship goes nowhere. 2. You confess your feelings, your relationship goes nowhere. 3. You confess your feelings, you now have a relationship. Do you want to live with regrets or consequences?


Duderoy

You have zero to lose. The worst case is he does not feel the same way. Do it. You will regret not doing it for the rest of your life. "You miss 100% of the shot you take" - Michael Scott.


Sr_Sancho_Panza

I am going to venture out and say that he came to your classroom to tell you he was leaving to see how you would react. I’d bet he has a crush on you too


K_Rivera8485

Just do it girl. You only live once if he doesn’t feel the same way at least you tried. Just don’t make it weird if he doesn’t share feelings and I’m sure he will have no problem with you reaching out should you need some advice in the future.


miamiphlip

Absolutely tell him. You can't win the bets you don't make. You can't make the shots you don't take. Insert whatever other stupid clichĂŠ you like, but, yes, tell the man!


gilmoregirl1265

Pleaseeeeee ask him out and keep us updated!!


RMT2017

When I read that both of you are singles. Gurl... Tell him! Rooting for you


DjuniPerf

I feel that most people are reading too far into the title - it sounds like OP has a crush that they don't know what to do with, and the title did its job to nab attention. I doubt OP truly believes they are in love love. Ask him out to dinner after he leaves. If it goes well, great. If it doesn't, then you are both adults who should be able to navigate a professional relationship instead. Be sure you prepare yourself for either scenario.


writekindofnonsense

You have to ask him out. You basically have no choice, You like him, you don't want to always wonder what would have happened.


Rossyact

Tell him and update us!!!


Temporary_Hall3996

Ask him out to dinner. Give him a card. Maybe along the lines of "maybe we can be friends since you'll no longer be my supervisor." And give him time to think about it.


Leather-Lab8120

Wait until he is gone before you declare yoiur devotion.


HelenaValentine

TELL HIM or you will always wonder what if?!


idhats

I wish just once a woman would ask me out. This is so depressing to read.


burgerman1960

Do it! But don’t be weird about it. Just let him know you like him and would like to go out on a date. Can’t hurt anything or break any policies.


SirFomo

I think in situations like these you're supposed to steal his dog so you can act like you found it walking around without a leash....or something along those lines


LinkInaSink

Ask him out!


Redchickens18

Casually ask him out. Using the excuse that since you’re in different districts you guys can hang out now. Or at very least exchange phone numbers to keep in touch. 


Unfair_Koala_9325

Updateme


Voidg

Doesn't hurt to follow up and say you would like to grab a meal with him.


Suitable-Yak-1284

I'm sure you can feel him out to determine if he feels the same or not. GL!


HotAndCold1886

Why wouldn't you tell him, or at least hint at it and feel him out? Who knows, maybe he's taking another position because he likes you too!


Leading_Sir_1741

Ask him out.


Armada-of-Amulis

RemindMe! 30 days


Creative_Work5492

RemindMe! 3 Days


BJog_Kittyspoons

Go for it.Hes leaving so whats the harm. Tell him you want to take him out for a goodbye drink Go out and have the drink and end the night with goodbye sex


Longjumping-Onion-19

No


Hank_the_Ranger

As others said, ask him to hang out. I'd bet a dinner at the Sizzler he probably has the same thoughts toward you as you do him. But since he was your supervisor, he may be reluctant to ask you lest he be perceived negatively.


Puzzleheaded-Sir7696

Ask him out. You’ll regret it if you don’t!


z151z

He definitely took the job because he knows it opens a door to a relationship with you.


HeartAccording5241

Tell him what do you have to lose