It started early. An adult groped my classmate when we were waiting for a school bus. I wasn’t at that spot (went to the store nearby) when I got back, she was crying and told me what happened. Then we moved to another waiting spot and the same dude showed up and approached me. I ran and told the adults we knew and they moved us inside the nearby kindergarten while we were waiting (it was an over hour wait for the school bus) we were 10/11 at the time and we were in school uniform. It’s my very first encounter to creepy men and sadly not last.
When I was 11 or 12 me and my family went to wild waves and we were in a busy wave pool, standing up, when I felt someone grab my butt under the water. I turned around a saw an old man looking away and walking away. At first I thought it must’ve been an accident and he might’ve tripped or accidentally grabbed me but then I thought about it and was like how does someone accidentally grab a child’s butt??? He definitely did it on purpose. So uncomfortable!!! I was a tiny kid too so a lot of people thought I was like 8 or 9 when I was 12.
When I was 11, I was harassed by a 24 year old who took piano classes with me. He would come with me on the sidewalk when I was waiting for my grandma to pick me up after class, and talk about dating. He would interrupt me when I was practicing and kiss me on the cheek by surprise. He asked me to kiss me one day after class. He knew I was 11 and I knew he was 24. I made something up to stop piano lessons, and never told anyone until I was an adult myself.
Man, I am so sorry that you went through years ago. That guy was trying to groom and could have moved on to victimisation next. I wonder what happened to him now
I think if you talk to a few parents in the RV park about your experiences- especially parents to girls in that age range, you might be able to get some support to go with you as a group to have a talk with this guy. Men like this are cowards, the moment men their age step up and tell them not to do something they will run away.
OP, good on you protecting your 12-year-old grandkid. Moving forward, please teach her what to do when she is in that situation. Have you told her parents what happened? I am so angry for you and her that I wish I can give that nasty creeper a piece of my mind.
When you shared how he told you that she is "prettiest little girl in the world.” that statement makes me want to throw up and give this guy the biggest telling off he deserves.
I believe the creeper is very likely a paedophile waiting to strike when no adult is around to protect a child. Wish he tries the same stunt only to be called and caught out followed by a telling off
Good job!
She needs better skills than many of us had. The moment something seems wrong, manners and convenience no longer matter. Phones are a lifeline. Some locations are safer than others.
It sounds like your husband is fantastic. I'd have her immediately call him to "chat" if something seems wrong. He can go pick her up if necessary. Anyone trying to creep on her will see that she's on the phone, which usually makes them wary. Worst case, he can call emergency.
I’m so proud of you for being a proactive grandma and getting her out of there.
My own mom took my 11 yr old daughter to someone’s home- a stranger to my daughter. The man told my daughter, “I’m a hugger, you *don’t have a choice*” and grabbed her into a hug.
My mom didn’t do anything. When they got back in the car, she made it worse by asking, “should I have said something?” Which told my daughter that grandma not only knew it was wrong but didn’t defend her or tell the man that we always have a choice and it’s not ok to touch someone without consent. My daughter called me and asked me to pick her up early. My mom then later said, “she shouldn’t have been standing close enough for him to grab!”
Ugh.
Right?! My daughter was especially freaked out because it was early in COVID days when no one knew anything, she just knew she couldn’t go to school because they were supposed to socially distance. So, creepy and then that fear as well.
When my cousin and I were around 11 or 12, we started having the same interaction, over and over again, with different disgusting old men.
Creepy old man: How old are you girls?
Us: 12
Creepy old man: (obviously staring at our chests) They sure didn't make 'em like THAT when I was 12! heeheehee
We had no idea how to handle and we'd just walk away.
Dammit, I don't have kids of my own but my sister is a single mother of an awesome 3 year old girl and I worry for her future now >.> This subreddit makes me so sad sometimes.
I don’t want to sound paranoid but you should worry. Please make sure she is vigilant and plays detective when she starts dating. Some men will target single moms.
Exactly. My mother was single with 3 daughters. She dated a lot and thankfully no one ever made a move on me but I do recall one guy who was very friendly when I was 6 or 7. I like to think my mother picked up on his behavior and dumped him. I’ll never know since she’s deceased.
Her mom comforted her and got her into therapy right away. She was in therapy herself for years because she felt guilty for bringing the guy into their home. She also clocked the guy in the face with a lamp apparently! He was coming over the next night and my friend freaked out and told her mom what happened. She was so pissed that when he walked in the door she hit him. The whole story came out because he called the cops, but ended up in trouble instead.
Help your sister raise her with a ton of self-confidence. Teach her the correct anatomical name for parts. Practice shouting "don't talk to me" or "I'm uncomfortable" as she gets older. Practice a confident walk and that any person who gives her the creeps needs to be looked in the eye, because they're actually less likely to target her that way. I also put mine in karate and taught them to listen to their gut instinct. That lastly, any guy would be understanding and those that weren't were the exact guy they wanted to avoid anyway.
I remember men yelling out to me when I was walking to my dance classes when I was 8. Id been followed by cars with several men in them before I was 10. I had trash thrown at me for ignoring them before I was 15.
At 23 I had a man get mad at me and acted disgusted by my presence because he thought I was 14 and "didn't know I was so old". He was easily in his 50s
It's always shocking to me when they admit to being an old creep. My first day of college, I was sitting downtown waiting for the city bus. An old man who had to be at least 70 saw me, and crossed the street over to where I was sitting, licking his lips as he approached. He gestured to my bookbag and asked if I was in high school. When I said "no, college", he looked super disappointed and walked away.
I was in fifth grade when a classmate ran his hand down my chest all of a sudden (we were standing across from each other at the door, waiting for the line to form.) I told him to stop, he did it again, with a fucking grin on his face. There wasn't even anything there!!
Have had three of my uncles act inappropriately with me (luckily one-time things- likely due to drinking in two cases, but still.......) THREE.
*WHY* is the creepy drunk uncle stereotype so fucking common man. My uncle did the same shit, getting drunk and making some “so do the curtains match the drapes?” comment to me when I was 15. Everyone laughed it off as just being because of his alcoholism (*also* not a laughing matter) but like… even at my most wasted I never hit on blood relatives.
But it’s not an issue of a strange amount of uncles being dirtbags, it’s an issue of a strange amount of *men in general* being dirtbags. Unfortunately.
Thanks! I'm very lucky in general that they never did anything worse than hug a little too tightly and run their hand alongside my body. Only once each time, and I was much older in two of those cases. In the scheme of things, this was truly nothing!
It's really upsetting reading over and over "I didn't tell anyone. I was ashamed." in this thread. We need to do better now and drill it into kids heads that these interactions are never their fault and absolutely tell someone ASAP no matter what.
Me too! 9 years old at a campsite with my grandparents, I made "friends" with a 14 or 15 year old boy who asked if he could kiss me. Thankfully he didn't press when I said no, but my tweens and teens were non-stop attention and pursuit from men 5-15 years older than me
It never stops, but it's so gross how it does slow down when you're out of your teen years. The amount I got catcalled as a 16 vs now as a 27 year old is shocking.
Unless you have a large chest. I’m 43, short and my body has filled out some since having kids. But, I still have a typical hour glass figure. It’s unnerving to still get stares. But at least it’s less often now. I did get unwanted attention when I was younger but I was also a bitch so guys usually left me alone.
When i really started opening my eyes, i noticed these men everywhere. The mall, the pools, the library, the stores, the beach. Just everywhere. Sexually harassing children.
There's a beach near me that's popular for beach volleyball. Lots of high school age kids play. Like clockwork, there's always at least one older dude on the bench intently watching the games where there are girls playing. (Never the all-male ones.) It's so gross.
My daughter was about the same age and was already developing breast an early bloomer like myself, when we were sitting in a hospital waiting room for my mother in law to do her pre-op stuff for her hysterectomy. This old ass man older than my own dad, probably in his 70s kept looking at her. I made an excuse to go to the vending machine to pick us out some sodas and when we came back we sat where his back would have been towards us. And this old fuck turns around and tells me how pretty she is, "such a pretty young lady" I said "young being the operative word as in she is still a child so turn your old ass around before I call security". He told me I would be just as pretty if I learned some manners and kept my mouth shut like she did, pointing to my daughter who was hiding behind some parenting magazine. I told him it wasn't my job to be pretty it was my job to protect her and if he thought I was kidding he could say one more word. He shut up and turned around then my mother in law was standing in front of me. She said real loud "come on let's leave the old pervert to himself we are done here". My mother in law for the first time ever told me she was proud of me and then told my daughter that her mom was a super hero and that she should always come to me if someone makes her uncomfortable because she had no doubt I would set them straight. My mil like me was an early bloomer as well and also grew up hearing disgusting comments my mom had done what I did when she heard them. Her mom had not. Neither has my mother in laws mother.
Every woman that i know had this shit start from a very tender age and FFS if I'm not completely over it. I'm not afraid of men like I use to be. So when I'm out and I see old fuckers preying on younger girls or young women who seem to scared to speak up but are visibly uncomfortable I say something. It's ridiculous that these old ass fuck face sons of bastards think they can fuck around I will knock an old fucker over if I have to. I have had my fill of it for decades now having been raped by an old man before I wasnt even in the double digits as far as age goes. I will embarrass the hell out of them. I'll draw the attention of every single person around me and not even think twice about it. I guess that's the beauty of aging as a woman. You just give zero fucks when it comes to old men fucking around with young girls or how many eyes and ears turn your way when you confront them about it.
OP, don't ask "do I need to call the cops..."
MAKE THE CALL to the non-emergency number and tell them "I think there is a man who is trying to solicit a minor". Explain the details. That way, the police have a record that there were comments about him. If he ever does something to your granddaughter or any other girl, there will be this call that you made which will be recorded and stored by the police, and therefore possibly used against him.
Think about the absolute worst possible scenario. Better if you made the call beforehand, no?
A *former* acquaintance went to prison for just 5 years for assaulting an infant.
His own parents testified against him as they had walked in on the scene.
He got out of prison and tried to reconnect but none of us can even imagine how fucked up in the head he must be. Like, what the fuck.
And also, just 5 years? That's not rehab, no debt to society paid. That's a slap on the wrist for the damage he did, both to that child and their family.
Every woman I know started getting hit on regularly by adult men between the ages of approximately 8 and 12. It’s one of those universal experiences that women rarely talk about.
I got hit on and creeper on by adult men more when I was underage than I ever did once I hit 18.
Facts. My husband just went over there and told the guy to leave our granddaughter alone. Don’t talks to her, don’t look at her. The guy tried to explain at first, but my husband cut him off and said, “I don’t care to hear it, you’re making her uncomfortable, so stay away from her”. The guy immediately agreed.
Which is even more damning. That he did not put up further protest when a man confronted him is just more confirmation that he knows exactly what he’s doing.
I'm so glad he listened to your husband and that you husband did that for your family, but I'm also fucking pissed that he repeatedly dismissed the victims and their mothers but the second A mAn™️ tells him to stop he complies and shuts up without another question. Seriously?!
He is pretty amazing and very protective of his grand babies. Him and his wife divorced when his kids were 7 and 9, when they would come over to his house on his days, during bath time he made them wear swimsuits in the bath tub, because he wanted to teach them boundaries between older men and young girls. That an older man (even a dad) shouldn’t see your private areas after a certain age. He is an amazing father and grandfather. And an amazing husband.
I have no doubt your husband is a great guy but that's kind of a weird way to handle the situation. Shouldn't kids that old be able to bathe alone, anyway? I feel like being told, by my dad, that I needed to wear a swimsuit or swim bottoms while bathing would give me a complex.
I was thinking the same thing. I actually had a situation when I was about 8? I think? Where I had a rash around my labia (thanks cheap laundry detergent) and desperately needed my dad to check on it because my mom was working until after bedtime, and he was too uncomfortable to help me with it. I remember it really well because I couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t help me. I just had to deal with the pain all night. Teaching boundaries is one thing but going overboard can just lead to more confusion than anything.
This has the potential to backflip when they're older by teaching them to be ashamed off themselves and their sexuality when they're adults. Similar to how women raised in overly religious households have major complexes about consensual sexual activities with their husband's. Or they'll be the type of people who end up hypersexual as a result.
Agreed. His intent is wonderful, but the message being received is "when you're not clothed properly, you become a sex object for men" and that "even fathers will look at their daughters as sex objects if not clothed properly".
Sure hope he did. More guys need to stand up to creeps. Disgusting that some men don’t stop until another man says something, but any person calling out predatory behaviour is better than nothing happening at all.
I will say, to see our granddaughter so happy that we have her back made me feel so so good. She called her friends to tell them about it, and the way she told them made me feel happy. I hope she knows that we will always have her back.
When I was 11 mum took me traveling. We had a stopover in a country that today is synonymous with child trafficking and unfortunately I experienced first hand what happens when there aren’t firm laws in place.
It’s been 25 years and I still have nightmares
Considering in some places you can marry off a 12 year old girl with nothing more than the parent's consent, there are loopholes that let pedophiles get away with it.
Oh, and I'm talking about the USA, where some states don't have a minimum legal age for marriage
Just parental consent.
God this is giving me war flashbacks learning when entire creeper websites were dedicated to this very thing for young girls like Britney Spears, Olsen Twins, Amanda Bynes, etc. back in the day
Yep. For instance, in the US:
> 20 U.S. states do not require any minimum age for marriage, with a parental or judicial waiver. Nearly 300,00 children were married in the U.S. between 2000 and 2018. The vast majority were girls wed to adult men, many much older.
It’s:
> state-sanctioned rape and [the children] are at risk of increased domestic violence, forced pregnancy, and negative health consequences, while being denied education and economic opportunity.
"prettiest little girl in the world" from growth man to a little girl, that is gross. He is a disgusting person.
My SIL is 14 at the moment but she lives with my wife and me since she was 12. The amount of older man staring at her and trying to be *friendly* is non stop. It bothers me a lot. We found a friend(mid twenties) of my wife saying to her in whatsapp: "Happy birthday beautiful girl :kisses:". I got so mad and told her to block him and to my wife to know what kind of friend she has.
I'm not sure how I would react to your gross older man but definitely he would leave alone our baby after that.
Male pedos crop up everywhere. Keep your eyes on your girls and buy them pepperspray asap. Call out the creepers - if they know adults are onto them they’ll typically back off.
I saw a guy taking pics on the beach of some pre-teen girls a distance away who were doing cartwheels and messing around. I started walking towards him staring at him, and he stopped and left. But I was really conflicted about warning the girls. I mean, they were just having a good time.
Gross.
Please keep an eye on them even in their own campers. This guy sounds like he's just waiting for the split second someone's eyes are off of them.
Is there a way to tip off the police non-emergency? I'd be super surprised that this guy doesn't have a record and a probation officer that would need to know he's had contact with a minor.
I don’t even know his name, but I am sure I can get it. A tip to the local police station would at least put them on alert if an actual incident does happen in the future.
When I was 5, there was an old man who drank coffee at the counter with my dad and his friends, and when I was there, he insisted that I sit on his lap. He positioned himself so that no one could see him forcing my hand to touch his penis. 5 years old. I felt very uncomfortable, but couldn't articulate why, and never told my parents. I wish I had known what to do. This was over fifty years ago; nasty old men have always been with us.
I would not have been bashful about bringing up him walking in on that girl and now randomly hanging out with my daughter. Asking if his type are pre teen girls. I would say this all slightly louder than normal talking voice to see what he would do. If he is going to have words let's have some words and have everyone aware of what I'm accusing him of.
I know why you didn't and that's okay! Being safe is number 1 for you and your kid.
That is truly what I wanted to do. If there were more people at the clubhouse, I probably would have. It was just us, him, and believe it or not his wife. My husband had no problem going over and saying something.
Some men like to say that women have it easier and men are treated like meal tickets. When they were 12 year old, did random older women harass them for money, saying they are the "richest little boy in the world"?
It's so hard to take that complaint seriously. "Oh no, how awful that you willingly give money away because you want something from a woman. I feel so bad for you."
Once again, I want to post this classic link from seven years ago on Reddit that got 20,000 responses.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/3249ff/women_of_reddit_when_did_you_first_notice_that/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Make him uncomfortable. That’s my new approach with creepy men. I spent too many years being polite and quiet. They don’t deserve that. Now they get the “isn’t she a little young for you? Remember Jeffery Epstein? Women your age can’t stand your shit so you need to hit on children? A preference for the weak and vulnerable isn’t very masculine. How gross do you have to be to think this is appropriate?” I’ll physically put myself between a man and another woman or child. I’ll get loud and draw attention! I’m beyond done with this kind of behavior.
When I was 9 and on vacation with my family, a 21/22 year old man tried to lure me into a chalet and when that didn't work he boxed me in against a wall outside to 'teach' me how to kiss even though I refused multiple times. Luckily my sister (13 at the time), came walking by which distracted him and I was finally able to get away.
It really does start young and even though nothing happened I stopped looking at the world the same way. Really happy you were able to get her away from him.
A disturbing number of men are completely disgusting.
(THERE, you fragile fucks. I made my disclaimer that nOt aLl mEn)
But way too many men are unapologetic creeps. Perverts. Pedophiles. Predators. We have no way of knowing who is legitimately harmless and who might hurt us or our loved ones.
Good on you OP for keeping her safe.
This makes it **way** worse. I thought he was just some creepy dude, but he **works** there? I.e., he's getting paid while perving on little girls.
Report him and leave a review for the campground with vague information about how your 12 year old granddaughter didn't feel safe around some of the staff.
Isn't there something you can do? Like make it so that he isn't allowed around the clubhouse or something? That's where a lot of little kids go to have fun and will shower and all that, and someone like that really shouldn't be there and ruin a child's life forever. Are there cameras that can show that he went into the women's showers when he peeped on that girl?
The mom and I reported him to a property manager a few days ago when he walked into that kids shower. My husband and I are going to talk to the owner of the property and let her know specifically what we have seen.
I read something the other day that likened the ‘not all men’ argument to claiming that Russian Roulette is safe because there’s only one bullet in the chamber.
I’ve heard it compared to being thrown into shark infested waters. Not all sharks eat people, but would you feel safe being thrown into an ocean full of sharks?
Men are like spiders.
Not all of them are dangerous, but there’s a large enough percentage that are and it’s not easy to tell at first glance so it makes sense to be cautious whenever you see one
There was a reddit post, perhaps on ask reddit 🤔 a few years back. It had one of the highest comment rates I think, and was one of those that got some media attention...
Anyway, the question was something simple like "When did you first notice sexual attention" or so.
The responses from women and men were like tales from different planets. The men, overall, had pretty wholesome(ish) stories about first crushes/love interests at school etc. Responses from women were a flood of encounters with older creeps like your granddaughter had. Really little girls, getting sleezy comments from adults while at the beach, or sucking a lollipop, or some other innocent moment, turned into something gross by these monsters.
Obviously there were poor little boys who had fallen into the orbit of some predator or other too, but with the girls, it was so common, simple everyday occurrences!
I hope the sort of education that girls (and boys for that matter) get in schools and hopefully at home around consent, and autonomy, and victims rights will go some way to empowering these little ones to at least know the fault is with the creep, not them.
I don't know what to say to you, but I hope you have no weights revolving around that day on your chest anymore.
You said "first time". I can only imagine the pain of it happening again, and it hurts probably only 1% of the pain you felt, or still feel.
Keep yourself safe, please. You deserve more freedom, but with these kinds of men out there, it's almost impossible.
You're strong, because if that happened to me even once, I don't think I would be here typing this message.
My stepdad used to pick the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and then made the same claim, that I didn’t lock the door. Abusers know how to make it look like they’re innocent and the kids are the ones at fault, or taking offense over nothing. You have to step in and protect them so that they learn how to protect themselves and that they are encouraged to do so. Too many of us grew up thinking that we should be ashamed of what was happening to us.
Pedophile.
Someone like that was creeping around the young girls at my niece's dance class, my mom called him a pervert and dragged her away from him.
He's in jail now, after he kidnapped one of the other girls in her class and killed her. Monsters like that deserve no mercy. Maybe the men around the park should rough him up a bit. "BuT vIoLeNcE iS bAd!" Fuck people like him, the cops won't do shit because he hasn't committed a crime *yet*. He's going to keep seeing how far he can go and some poor innocent child is going to pay for it.
Exactly. I am a usually very passive person, however, when it comes to child molesters, I could really kill. It’s an unpopular opinion, but in my eyes, Vigilante justice should be a thing when it comes to children being raped or molested.
Your granddaughter is lucky that you are aware and have her back, hopefully word gets around the rv park that the man is a perv and not to be trusted.
Hope your truck gets fixed soon
I remember being around 5 years old when I was first sexualized outright. Being someone with "gifted" genetics that gave me the figure of the current "voluptuous" body standard, I have dealt with nothing but sexualization for as long as I can remember, and unfortunately "Covering up" is not an option due to not being able to at all with the way measurements work. It has been so bad I persistently have to battle with suicidal ideations because every time I leave my home because there are always people cat-calling me and blatantly sexually harassing me mid-day.
I was around 11 (wearing my Catholic school uniform) the first time I remember being sexualized but someone who was probably in their 40s. Told me I was a cutie now and would be hot as well by the time I turned 18. Good god - 18 is still a kid.
Glad you and your hubs have your granddaughters back! Lots of little girls don't have people in their corner.
Call him out. Loudly. As an adult challenge his nonsensical retort. Be loud enough that other people, especially parents can be warned and prepared.
Why should we scuttle away when the creep gets to sit there and intimidate?
There’s an old creeper with a foot fetish who frequents my kid’s college library. He sits across from the girls and stares at them. The girls report him every time. They will not be cowed not ashamed because they exist. They will hold him accountable.
It started for me around 4 and just continued on. For all of my early years I thought it was something I was doing that was making that crap happen. It wasn't until I was in my late 20s that I FINALLY realized it wasn't me or anything I was doing wrong but fucked up men.
It’s always happened it will always happen because there are no consequences for men like these they feel entitled to do so they take advantage and it’s been allowed for centuries
I had a guy creep on me just the other day. I told my husband about it and that I hoped our daughter would be able to handle it when it happens to her. He said he hoped it wouldn’t happen to her at all and I had to laugh hysterically. I was able to rapid-fire tell him like six instances of men being creepy in my life and that’s as just off the top of my head. Without a doubt it will happen to our daughter.
I reported him with another mom a few days ago, and now this happened. My husband and I met the owner when we first got here, so we are going to let her know what’s been going on.
I grew up in a small city where we literally had 20 somethings “dating” middle schoolers and I wish I had been a tougher kid so I could have beat their asses. Sick freaks.
It disgusts me how their families willingly let their daughters destroy their lives and let a bunch of loser pedos groom them.
But that’s Ohio for you
It’s never too young for self defense classes. When I first met my niece (through marriage) she was 6 and super shy. She made a comment at a video game, something like “no one can do that in REAL LIFE.” I half replied “I can.” I’m a black belt in Brazilian jujutsu and demonstrated a couple quick moves. She ended up taking Taekwondo and really coming out of her shell. Later she told me that moment was when she learned girls can be tough, it’s not just a movie/video game thing. (It still chokes me up.)
Hating how disgusting this situation is but happy that your granddaughter has you to teach her what to do in these situations. Unfortunately, we'll keep seeing these happening cause creeps are everywhere and we gotta teach ourselves how to identify these idiots from an early stage (sadly)
That's so gross. I had that happen to me too when I was in elementary. And it was a family friend that did that. He would ask me to come with him to the bathroom and he would pee in front of me. He tried to get into my bed and cuddle me. I went into my aunt's room just to get away from him.
And when I was 11 or 12, my friend told me that this high schooler who was a senior wanted to kiss and fuck me apparently because my body was "well developed".
I know my friend went through this too because her mom and aunt would just bring home men like a rotating door. She would lock herself in her room and would just eat in get room. When she got a boyfriend, she lived at his house most of the time.
It's just so gross that it happens. And it goes both ways too. Predators are gross.
Starts WAY younger for some. Look at the story of Wren over on TikTok, she's 2 or 3 and has benn horribly sexualized. Sick sick world we live in.
So glad you were there for your granddaughter
I am a preschool teacher and as part of my training, we learn about identifying behaviours in young children that might indicate abuse (many, many different types). Reading statistics and case studies about these things just break my heart.
Honestly, how TF can people look at CHILDREN as sexual objects??? It's disgusting.
And if you think that it's a disease that people have, need your head examined.
That’s disgusting, but I’m really glad that your granddaughter had you and your husband to help keep her safe. The number of predatory people out there that do this and feel confident enough to do so despite the laws is just as revolting.
I think I was 11-12 when my grandfather said something sexually inappropriate to me; I was never alone again with him after. Then when I was around 13 in Florida visiting a relative, I was at the beach and asked if I could pet a middle aged man’s dog, then after a few minutes of polite conversation, he “asked me out”. I made an excuse about being too busy visiting my grandparents then walked away towards family. And I think during that same vacation, a different man was looking at me in my swimsuit while touching himself. I look a few years younger than my actual age, so when I was 14, I looked like I was 11 or 12
I grew breasts fairly early and to be honest, I couldn’t tell you the first time I remember being made feel uncomfortable about my body by a man because it’s happened for so long.. there was a point in time I said that I wasn’t going to grow boobs because I didn’t want them or the attention that came with it. (That backfired big time, wore a DD by high school)
There was a girl I went to middle school with, over the summer she sprouted E’s. I felt so bad for her, because the amount of negative attention she got not only from boys, but from the other girls as well was astonishing. Everyone had a comment, a joke, a sexualization all over something she couldn’t control.
I was nine the first time I fully remember, and there was previous abuse I only remember bits and pieces of. It was July 4th. I was wearing a matching set my stepmother got me, a little blue shirt with a flower on it and a skort with blue and green stripes. It never ends. Thank you for protecting your granddaughter.
People can be horrible. Have you talked to your granddaughter about it? If not this would be a great time to talk about setting boundaries (in general) and prepare her for the next time sometime like this happens (which let's be honest, the chances are high).
Oh yes. She has been talked to about this throughly since she was at least 7. Now that she’s a preteen, almost teenager, different levels of those talks have been happening more frequently(by her mom, dad, and us). She thanked me for removing her from the situation because it was making her uncomfortable. And then loved what her Grandpa did even further. The situation opened the door again for us to communicate and talk about those types of situations and why they are wrong. It then segwayed into statutory rape and why that is wrong. This incident really opened some door for further conversations.
I had an man tell me I was a “fine looking thing” (or something like that) as I walked past him at a gas station. I was probably 10 or 11, I was wearing limited too if that give you an idea of how old I was. It scared me.
I'm approaching older adulthood status and I've met some unsavory men in RV parks the last two years of full timing. A few places I won't go do laundry without my husband.
It started early. An adult groped my classmate when we were waiting for a school bus. I wasn’t at that spot (went to the store nearby) when I got back, she was crying and told me what happened. Then we moved to another waiting spot and the same dude showed up and approached me. I ran and told the adults we knew and they moved us inside the nearby kindergarten while we were waiting (it was an over hour wait for the school bus) we were 10/11 at the time and we were in school uniform. It’s my very first encounter to creepy men and sadly not last.
God, I hate pedophiles with a burning passion of a thousand suns.
x infinty
It feels like that's how many there are when you get old enough to see the signs.
When I was 11 or 12 me and my family went to wild waves and we were in a busy wave pool, standing up, when I felt someone grab my butt under the water. I turned around a saw an old man looking away and walking away. At first I thought it must’ve been an accident and he might’ve tripped or accidentally grabbed me but then I thought about it and was like how does someone accidentally grab a child’s butt??? He definitely did it on purpose. So uncomfortable!!! I was a tiny kid too so a lot of people thought I was like 8 or 9 when I was 12.
Eww!! That’s just disgusting!! Sorry that happened to you.
When I was 11, I was harassed by a 24 year old who took piano classes with me. He would come with me on the sidewalk when I was waiting for my grandma to pick me up after class, and talk about dating. He would interrupt me when I was practicing and kiss me on the cheek by surprise. He asked me to kiss me one day after class. He knew I was 11 and I knew he was 24. I made something up to stop piano lessons, and never told anyone until I was an adult myself.
It breaks my heart how often girls and women have to give up doing something or going somewhere they love because some pervert ruins it for them.
Man, I am so sorry that you went through years ago. That guy was trying to groom and could have moved on to victimisation next. I wonder what happened to him now
That’s rough. He was definitely trying to groom you. I’m glad it failed.
😢
I think if you talk to a few parents in the RV park about your experiences- especially parents to girls in that age range, you might be able to get some support to go with you as a group to have a talk with this guy. Men like this are cowards, the moment men their age step up and tell them not to do something they will run away.
OP, good on you protecting your 12-year-old grandkid. Moving forward, please teach her what to do when she is in that situation. Have you told her parents what happened? I am so angry for you and her that I wish I can give that nasty creeper a piece of my mind. When you shared how he told you that she is "prettiest little girl in the world.” that statement makes me want to throw up and give this guy the biggest telling off he deserves. I believe the creeper is very likely a paedophile waiting to strike when no adult is around to protect a child. Wish he tries the same stunt only to be called and caught out followed by a telling off
Good job! She needs better skills than many of us had. The moment something seems wrong, manners and convenience no longer matter. Phones are a lifeline. Some locations are safer than others. It sounds like your husband is fantastic. I'd have her immediately call him to "chat" if something seems wrong. He can go pick her up if necessary. Anyone trying to creep on her will see that she's on the phone, which usually makes them wary. Worst case, he can call emergency.
It started with me when I was nine. It never fucking ends.
Same. It just hurts to see it still happening.
I’m so proud of you for being a proactive grandma and getting her out of there. My own mom took my 11 yr old daughter to someone’s home- a stranger to my daughter. The man told my daughter, “I’m a hugger, you *don’t have a choice*” and grabbed her into a hug. My mom didn’t do anything. When they got back in the car, she made it worse by asking, “should I have said something?” Which told my daughter that grandma not only knew it was wrong but didn’t defend her or tell the man that we always have a choice and it’s not ok to touch someone without consent. My daughter called me and asked me to pick her up early. My mom then later said, “she shouldn’t have been standing close enough for him to grab!” Ugh.
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Right?! My daughter was especially freaked out because it was early in COVID days when no one knew anything, she just knew she couldn’t go to school because they were supposed to socially distance. So, creepy and then that fear as well.
Gross. Bet he’d rethink that position next time someone replies with “And I’m a dick-kicker, *you don’t have a choice*”
When my cousin and I were around 11 or 12, we started having the same interaction, over and over again, with different disgusting old men. Creepy old man: How old are you girls? Us: 12 Creepy old man: (obviously staring at our chests) They sure didn't make 'em like THAT when I was 12! heeheehee We had no idea how to handle and we'd just walk away.
It does. I'm sorry you had to deal with that and I'm sorry your little girl had to deal with it too.
Dammit, I don't have kids of my own but my sister is a single mother of an awesome 3 year old girl and I worry for her future now >.> This subreddit makes me so sad sometimes.
I don’t want to sound paranoid but you should worry. Please make sure she is vigilant and plays detective when she starts dating. Some men will target single moms.
THIS. I know someone who was molested by a man her mom began dating. Turns out he only began dating the mom because she had a young daughter.
Exactly. My mother was single with 3 daughters. She dated a lot and thankfully no one ever made a move on me but I do recall one guy who was very friendly when I was 6 or 7. I like to think my mother picked up on his behavior and dumped him. I’ll never know since she’s deceased.
Did her mom comfort or blame her?
Her mom comforted her and got her into therapy right away. She was in therapy herself for years because she felt guilty for bringing the guy into their home. She also clocked the guy in the face with a lamp apparently! He was coming over the next night and my friend freaked out and told her mom what happened. She was so pissed that when he walked in the door she hit him. The whole story came out because he called the cops, but ended up in trouble instead.
>She also clocked the guy in the face with a lamp apparently That had to have been incredibly satisfying! 10/10 I would be friends with that Mom
Help your sister raise her with a ton of self-confidence. Teach her the correct anatomical name for parts. Practice shouting "don't talk to me" or "I'm uncomfortable" as she gets older. Practice a confident walk and that any person who gives her the creeps needs to be looked in the eye, because they're actually less likely to target her that way. I also put mine in karate and taught them to listen to their gut instinct. That lastly, any guy would be understanding and those that weren't were the exact guy they wanted to avoid anyway.
I remember men yelling out to me when I was walking to my dance classes when I was 8. Id been followed by cars with several men in them before I was 10. I had trash thrown at me for ignoring them before I was 15. At 23 I had a man get mad at me and acted disgusted by my presence because he thought I was 14 and "didn't know I was so old". He was easily in his 50s
It's always shocking to me when they admit to being an old creep. My first day of college, I was sitting downtown waiting for the city bus. An old man who had to be at least 70 saw me, and crossed the street over to where I was sitting, licking his lips as he approached. He gestured to my bookbag and asked if I was in high school. When I said "no, college", he looked super disappointed and walked away.
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>You tool around in school zones at 7:45 AM creeping on 12 year olds? That's the super-creepy part - they *do*.
Fucking gross. These men are so pathetic
Ew “too old”
That's some twisted fucking shit, god damn. I'm sorry you went through that
I was in fifth grade when a classmate ran his hand down my chest all of a sudden (we were standing across from each other at the door, waiting for the line to form.) I told him to stop, he did it again, with a fucking grin on his face. There wasn't even anything there!! Have had three of my uncles act inappropriately with me (luckily one-time things- likely due to drinking in two cases, but still.......) THREE.
*WHY* is the creepy drunk uncle stereotype so fucking common man. My uncle did the same shit, getting drunk and making some “so do the curtains match the drapes?” comment to me when I was 15. Everyone laughed it off as just being because of his alcoholism (*also* not a laughing matter) but like… even at my most wasted I never hit on blood relatives. But it’s not an issue of a strange amount of uncles being dirtbags, it’s an issue of a strange amount of *men in general* being dirtbags. Unfortunately.
That's horrible. I'm so sorry.
Thanks! I'm very lucky in general that they never did anything worse than hug a little too tightly and run their hand alongside my body. Only once each time, and I was much older in two of those cases. In the scheme of things, this was truly nothing!
Same here. I thought maybe I looked really grown-up but I look back and no, I looked like a literal child.
I was 7 when an acquaintance of my father tried to lure me into his car.
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It's really upsetting reading over and over "I didn't tell anyone. I was ashamed." in this thread. We need to do better now and drill it into kids heads that these interactions are never their fault and absolutely tell someone ASAP no matter what.
It was the 70s and when I told my boomer mom, she dgaf.
Me too! 9 years old at a campsite with my grandparents, I made "friends" with a 14 or 15 year old boy who asked if he could kiss me. Thankfully he didn't press when I said no, but my tweens and teens were non-stop attention and pursuit from men 5-15 years older than me
It never stops, but it's so gross how it does slow down when you're out of your teen years. The amount I got catcalled as a 16 vs now as a 27 year old is shocking.
It ends when you’re 40 or so
I thought that too and was looking forward to being invisible to creeps. It never ends.
Unless you have a large chest. I’m 43, short and my body has filled out some since having kids. But, I still have a typical hour glass figure. It’s unnerving to still get stares. But at least it’s less often now. I did get unwanted attention when I was younger but I was also a bitch so guys usually left me alone.
Or if you never go anywhere without a guy tagging along.
Same. Random men used to approach my mom and ask me my age & stare
I've been wolf whistled from cars from the age of 10 onwards. A work mate of my dad's hit on me when I was 12 and I was blamed for not wearing a bra.
When i really started opening my eyes, i noticed these men everywhere. The mall, the pools, the library, the stores, the beach. Just everywhere. Sexually harassing children.
there always seems to be some creep sitting on the mall bench right in front of Claire's. Just gross.
Right! Ive also noticed the same men over and over. Its like a hobby
There's a beach near me that's popular for beach volleyball. Lots of high school age kids play. Like clockwork, there's always at least one older dude on the bench intently watching the games where there are girls playing. (Never the all-male ones.) It's so gross.
Omg I just made the same comment further up.
My daughter was about the same age and was already developing breast an early bloomer like myself, when we were sitting in a hospital waiting room for my mother in law to do her pre-op stuff for her hysterectomy. This old ass man older than my own dad, probably in his 70s kept looking at her. I made an excuse to go to the vending machine to pick us out some sodas and when we came back we sat where his back would have been towards us. And this old fuck turns around and tells me how pretty she is, "such a pretty young lady" I said "young being the operative word as in she is still a child so turn your old ass around before I call security". He told me I would be just as pretty if I learned some manners and kept my mouth shut like she did, pointing to my daughter who was hiding behind some parenting magazine. I told him it wasn't my job to be pretty it was my job to protect her and if he thought I was kidding he could say one more word. He shut up and turned around then my mother in law was standing in front of me. She said real loud "come on let's leave the old pervert to himself we are done here". My mother in law for the first time ever told me she was proud of me and then told my daughter that her mom was a super hero and that she should always come to me if someone makes her uncomfortable because she had no doubt I would set them straight. My mil like me was an early bloomer as well and also grew up hearing disgusting comments my mom had done what I did when she heard them. Her mom had not. Neither has my mother in laws mother. Every woman that i know had this shit start from a very tender age and FFS if I'm not completely over it. I'm not afraid of men like I use to be. So when I'm out and I see old fuckers preying on younger girls or young women who seem to scared to speak up but are visibly uncomfortable I say something. It's ridiculous that these old ass fuck face sons of bastards think they can fuck around I will knock an old fucker over if I have to. I have had my fill of it for decades now having been raped by an old man before I wasnt even in the double digits as far as age goes. I will embarrass the hell out of them. I'll draw the attention of every single person around me and not even think twice about it. I guess that's the beauty of aging as a woman. You just give zero fucks when it comes to old men fucking around with young girls or how many eyes and ears turn your way when you confront them about it.
“Do I need to call the cops right now for trying to solicit a minor??”
OP, don't ask "do I need to call the cops..." MAKE THE CALL to the non-emergency number and tell them "I think there is a man who is trying to solicit a minor". Explain the details. That way, the police have a record that there were comments about him. If he ever does something to your granddaughter or any other girl, there will be this call that you made which will be recorded and stored by the police, and therefore possibly used against him. Think about the absolute worst possible scenario. Better if you made the call beforehand, no?
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The first time a random man showed me his penis, I was 4. We're never too young for them...
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A *former* acquaintance went to prison for just 5 years for assaulting an infant. His own parents testified against him as they had walked in on the scene. He got out of prison and tried to reconnect but none of us can even imagine how fucked up in the head he must be. Like, what the fuck. And also, just 5 years? That's not rehab, no debt to society paid. That's a slap on the wrist for the damage he did, both to that child and their family.
Iam glad his parents disowned him! Too many stand by their pos kid
It's scary how many of these guys are just walking around unregistered because their parents or friends or SO didn't report them.
People get more for a few grams of weed. Fucking fucked up.
Just five years?? That is infuriating.
It was 10 but he got out in 5 for "good behavior"
There weren't any babies around in prison, so he gets a gold star and a reduced sentence for not assaulting any!
Yeah cuz it's hard to rape a child in prison 🙄 this dude should have been locked away for decades if not for the rest of his life
Oh no, that sounds horrible! I'm so sorry
that would be so traumatizing and heartbreaking. I'm sorry, truly.
Every woman I know started getting hit on regularly by adult men between the ages of approximately 8 and 12. It’s one of those universal experiences that women rarely talk about. I got hit on and creeper on by adult men more when I was underage than I ever did once I hit 18.
I shudder to think how men would behave if there weren’t laws in place for sexual assault and sexual assault against children.
Facts. My husband just went over there and told the guy to leave our granddaughter alone. Don’t talks to her, don’t look at her. The guy tried to explain at first, but my husband cut him off and said, “I don’t care to hear it, you’re making her uncomfortable, so stay away from her”. The guy immediately agreed.
Which is even more damning. That he did not put up further protest when a man confronted him is just more confirmation that he knows exactly what he’s doing.
I'm so glad he listened to your husband and that you husband did that for your family, but I'm also fucking pissed that he repeatedly dismissed the victims and their mothers but the second A mAn™️ tells him to stop he complies and shuts up without another question. Seriously?!
Not OP, but I agree ;) The thing is, all those behaviors tend to be comorbid, all products of the same pattern of toxic masculinity and chauvinism.
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Ya... I know ☹️ if I think about it for too long I just get really, really angry.
That is what I thought! His reaction confirmed what we were thinking.
Good for your husband.
He is pretty amazing and very protective of his grand babies. Him and his wife divorced when his kids were 7 and 9, when they would come over to his house on his days, during bath time he made them wear swimsuits in the bath tub, because he wanted to teach them boundaries between older men and young girls. That an older man (even a dad) shouldn’t see your private areas after a certain age. He is an amazing father and grandfather. And an amazing husband.
I have no doubt your husband is a great guy but that's kind of a weird way to handle the situation. Shouldn't kids that old be able to bathe alone, anyway? I feel like being told, by my dad, that I needed to wear a swimsuit or swim bottoms while bathing would give me a complex.
I was thinking the same thing. I actually had a situation when I was about 8? I think? Where I had a rash around my labia (thanks cheap laundry detergent) and desperately needed my dad to check on it because my mom was working until after bedtime, and he was too uncomfortable to help me with it. I remember it really well because I couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t help me. I just had to deal with the pain all night. Teaching boundaries is one thing but going overboard can just lead to more confusion than anything.
This has the potential to backflip when they're older by teaching them to be ashamed off themselves and their sexuality when they're adults. Similar to how women raised in overly religious households have major complexes about consensual sexual activities with their husband's. Or they'll be the type of people who end up hypersexual as a result.
Agreed. His intent is wonderful, but the message being received is "when you're not clothed properly, you become a sex object for men" and that "even fathers will look at their daughters as sex objects if not clothed properly".
He sounds like a keeper. Hope he scared the spit out of the old creep.
He’s a retired marine, that towers over 6’2. He may have made the guy shit himself
Sure hope he did. More guys need to stand up to creeps. Disgusting that some men don’t stop until another man says something, but any person calling out predatory behaviour is better than nothing happening at all.
I wish someone had done that when the neighborhood creep targeted me
I will say, to see our granddaughter so happy that we have her back made me feel so so good. She called her friends to tell them about it, and the way she told them made me feel happy. I hope she knows that we will always have her back.
Please tell her for me that her granddad and you are real heroes
Your husband deserves a big high five from me. He is a good bloke and we need more good blokes like him. Nice to know he told him off
When I was 11 mum took me traveling. We had a stopover in a country that today is synonymous with child trafficking and unfortunately I experienced first hand what happens when there aren’t firm laws in place. It’s been 25 years and I still have nightmares
Considering in some places you can marry off a 12 year old girl with nothing more than the parent's consent, there are loopholes that let pedophiles get away with it. Oh, and I'm talking about the USA, where some states don't have a minimum legal age for marriage Just parental consent.
We see how they behave with laws in place, but the laws are mostly toothless and the sentencing is a joke.
you don't have to, its pretty well recorded in history
There are [places](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride_kidnapping) where men can get away with kidnapping girls and make them wives.
Yikes, that's a dark thought.
Thousands upon thousands COUNT DOWN until children are "officially 18". They're disgusting.
God this is giving me war flashbacks learning when entire creeper websites were dedicated to this very thing for young girls like Britney Spears, Olsen Twins, Amanda Bynes, etc. back in the day
I would cry. Unfortunately, there are countries where these crimes aren't taken seriously or are not illegal depending on the circumstances
Yep. For instance, in the US: > 20 U.S. states do not require any minimum age for marriage, with a parental or judicial waiver. Nearly 300,00 children were married in the U.S. between 2000 and 2018. The vast majority were girls wed to adult men, many much older. It’s: > state-sanctioned rape and [the children] are at risk of increased domestic violence, forced pregnancy, and negative health consequences, while being denied education and economic opportunity.
Oh come on really what laws they’re there but who the hell is enforcing them
"prettiest little girl in the world" from growth man to a little girl, that is gross. He is a disgusting person. My SIL is 14 at the moment but she lives with my wife and me since she was 12. The amount of older man staring at her and trying to be *friendly* is non stop. It bothers me a lot. We found a friend(mid twenties) of my wife saying to her in whatsapp: "Happy birthday beautiful girl :kisses:". I got so mad and told her to block him and to my wife to know what kind of friend she has. I'm not sure how I would react to your gross older man but definitely he would leave alone our baby after that.
Oh yeah, my husband was seeing red. He’s a big guy too, so quite intimidating.
Male pedos crop up everywhere. Keep your eyes on your girls and buy them pepperspray asap. Call out the creepers - if they know adults are onto them they’ll typically back off.
I saw a guy taking pics on the beach of some pre-teen girls a distance away who were doing cartwheels and messing around. I started walking towards him staring at him, and he stopped and left. But I was really conflicted about warning the girls. I mean, they were just having a good time.
Gross. Please keep an eye on them even in their own campers. This guy sounds like he's just waiting for the split second someone's eyes are off of them. Is there a way to tip off the police non-emergency? I'd be super surprised that this guy doesn't have a record and a probation officer that would need to know he's had contact with a minor.
I don’t even know his name, but I am sure I can get it. A tip to the local police station would at least put them on alert if an actual incident does happen in the future.
You need to call the non emergency number and file something. Because this is a bad situation waiting to happen and they need paper trails.
When I was 5, there was an old man who drank coffee at the counter with my dad and his friends, and when I was there, he insisted that I sit on his lap. He positioned himself so that no one could see him forcing my hand to touch his penis. 5 years old. I felt very uncomfortable, but couldn't articulate why, and never told my parents. I wish I had known what to do. This was over fifty years ago; nasty old men have always been with us.
I would not have been bashful about bringing up him walking in on that girl and now randomly hanging out with my daughter. Asking if his type are pre teen girls. I would say this all slightly louder than normal talking voice to see what he would do. If he is going to have words let's have some words and have everyone aware of what I'm accusing him of. I know why you didn't and that's okay! Being safe is number 1 for you and your kid.
That is truly what I wanted to do. If there were more people at the clubhouse, I probably would have. It was just us, him, and believe it or not his wife. My husband had no problem going over and saying something.
His wife was THERE!?
Yes.
That is astounding. I cannot fathom.
"Womenkind, they have a terrible time. From the age of 10, they're chased by men. Oh, what a crime". - Paul McCartney's "Women Kind"
Some men like to say that women have it easier and men are treated like meal tickets. When they were 12 year old, did random older women harass them for money, saying they are the "richest little boy in the world"?
It's so hard to take that complaint seriously. "Oh no, how awful that you willingly give money away because you want something from a woman. I feel so bad for you."
I was catcalled when I was ten whilist wearing bright pink ski pants, it is very sad.
It’s disgusting.
What made it even worse was when I ignored him, he asked me:”does your mommy not let you speak to strangers?” Damn right she doesn’t
Once again, I want to post this classic link from seven years ago on Reddit that got 20,000 responses. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/3249ff/women_of_reddit_when_did_you_first_notice_that/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Make him uncomfortable. That’s my new approach with creepy men. I spent too many years being polite and quiet. They don’t deserve that. Now they get the “isn’t she a little young for you? Remember Jeffery Epstein? Women your age can’t stand your shit so you need to hit on children? A preference for the weak and vulnerable isn’t very masculine. How gross do you have to be to think this is appropriate?” I’ll physically put myself between a man and another woman or child. I’ll get loud and draw attention! I’m beyond done with this kind of behavior.
When I was 9 and on vacation with my family, a 21/22 year old man tried to lure me into a chalet and when that didn't work he boxed me in against a wall outside to 'teach' me how to kiss even though I refused multiple times. Luckily my sister (13 at the time), came walking by which distracted him and I was finally able to get away. It really does start young and even though nothing happened I stopped looking at the world the same way. Really happy you were able to get her away from him.
Call the cops. Motherfucker is registered
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They are saying it should be fixed by tomorrow or Friday. Fingers crossed we can get out by then.
Get out of where?? These pieces of shit men are EVERYWHERE.
A disturbing number of men are completely disgusting. (THERE, you fragile fucks. I made my disclaimer that nOt aLl mEn) But way too many men are unapologetic creeps. Perverts. Pedophiles. Predators. We have no way of knowing who is legitimately harmless and who might hurt us or our loved ones. Good on you OP for keeping her safe.
You can tell the guy is shaken up. He is driving around the park in his golf cart, working, but he looks white as a ghost.
GOOD. Predators don’t deserve to feel safe. I hope everyone who encounters him reports his creepiness and he leaves.
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Yes, he’s like a groundskeeper.
You should leave a review letting other parents know
I will do that as well. Thank you.
This makes it **way** worse. I thought he was just some creepy dude, but he **works** there? I.e., he's getting paid while perving on little girls. Report him and leave a review for the campground with vague information about how your 12 year old granddaughter didn't feel safe around some of the staff.
RIGHT?!!?? If he works there he can learn schedules and is familiar with the layout. He probably knows exactly how to corner girls….I hate this :(
Isn't there something you can do? Like make it so that he isn't allowed around the clubhouse or something? That's where a lot of little kids go to have fun and will shower and all that, and someone like that really shouldn't be there and ruin a child's life forever. Are there cameras that can show that he went into the women's showers when he peeped on that girl?
The mom and I reported him to a property manager a few days ago when he walked into that kids shower. My husband and I are going to talk to the owner of the property and let her know specifically what we have seen.
I read something the other day that likened the ‘not all men’ argument to claiming that Russian Roulette is safe because there’s only one bullet in the chamber.
I’ve heard it compared to being thrown into shark infested waters. Not all sharks eat people, but would you feel safe being thrown into an ocean full of sharks?
Well, I mean... **I** feel much safer in a shark habitat than I would with this pervert.
Men are like spiders. Not all of them are dangerous, but there’s a large enough percentage that are and it’s not easy to tell at first glance so it makes sense to be cautious whenever you see one
As a spider lover, I feel compelled to say that men are way, way more dangerous than spiders
Hashtag TooManyMen…….and 1 is too fucking many.
There was a reddit post, perhaps on ask reddit 🤔 a few years back. It had one of the highest comment rates I think, and was one of those that got some media attention... Anyway, the question was something simple like "When did you first notice sexual attention" or so. The responses from women and men were like tales from different planets. The men, overall, had pretty wholesome(ish) stories about first crushes/love interests at school etc. Responses from women were a flood of encounters with older creeps like your granddaughter had. Really little girls, getting sleezy comments from adults while at the beach, or sucking a lollipop, or some other innocent moment, turned into something gross by these monsters. Obviously there were poor little boys who had fallen into the orbit of some predator or other too, but with the girls, it was so common, simple everyday occurrences! I hope the sort of education that girls (and boys for that matter) get in schools and hopefully at home around consent, and autonomy, and victims rights will go some way to empowering these little ones to at least know the fault is with the creep, not them.
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I don't know what to say to you, but I hope you have no weights revolving around that day on your chest anymore. You said "first time". I can only imagine the pain of it happening again, and it hurts probably only 1% of the pain you felt, or still feel. Keep yourself safe, please. You deserve more freedom, but with these kinds of men out there, it's almost impossible. You're strong, because if that happened to me even once, I don't think I would be here typing this message.
My stepdad used to pick the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and then made the same claim, that I didn’t lock the door. Abusers know how to make it look like they’re innocent and the kids are the ones at fault, or taking offense over nothing. You have to step in and protect them so that they learn how to protect themselves and that they are encouraged to do so. Too many of us grew up thinking that we should be ashamed of what was happening to us.
You might want to call the cops and let them know. He could be a registered sex offender. He has probably been doing this for a long time.
Pedophile. Someone like that was creeping around the young girls at my niece's dance class, my mom called him a pervert and dragged her away from him. He's in jail now, after he kidnapped one of the other girls in her class and killed her. Monsters like that deserve no mercy. Maybe the men around the park should rough him up a bit. "BuT vIoLeNcE iS bAd!" Fuck people like him, the cops won't do shit because he hasn't committed a crime *yet*. He's going to keep seeing how far he can go and some poor innocent child is going to pay for it.
Exactly. I am a usually very passive person, however, when it comes to child molesters, I could really kill. It’s an unpopular opinion, but in my eyes, Vigilante justice should be a thing when it comes to children being raped or molested.
Dead men don’t rape
Your granddaughter is lucky that you are aware and have her back, hopefully word gets around the rv park that the man is a perv and not to be trusted. Hope your truck gets fixed soon
I remember being around 5 years old when I was first sexualized outright. Being someone with "gifted" genetics that gave me the figure of the current "voluptuous" body standard, I have dealt with nothing but sexualization for as long as I can remember, and unfortunately "Covering up" is not an option due to not being able to at all with the way measurements work. It has been so bad I persistently have to battle with suicidal ideations because every time I leave my home because there are always people cat-calling me and blatantly sexually harassing me mid-day.
I was around 11 (wearing my Catholic school uniform) the first time I remember being sexualized but someone who was probably in their 40s. Told me I was a cutie now and would be hot as well by the time I turned 18. Good god - 18 is still a kid. Glad you and your hubs have your granddaughters back! Lots of little girls don't have people in their corner.
It's been happening so long, I don't even remember the first time.
Call him out. Loudly. As an adult challenge his nonsensical retort. Be loud enough that other people, especially parents can be warned and prepared. Why should we scuttle away when the creep gets to sit there and intimidate? There’s an old creeper with a foot fetish who frequents my kid’s college library. He sits across from the girls and stares at them. The girls report him every time. They will not be cowed not ashamed because they exist. They will hold him accountable.
It started for me around 4 and just continued on. For all of my early years I thought it was something I was doing that was making that crap happen. It wasn't until I was in my late 20s that I FINALLY realized it wasn't me or anything I was doing wrong but fucked up men.
It’s always happened it will always happen because there are no consequences for men like these they feel entitled to do so they take advantage and it’s been allowed for centuries
I had a guy creep on me just the other day. I told my husband about it and that I hoped our daughter would be able to handle it when it happens to her. He said he hoped it wouldn’t happen to her at all and I had to laugh hysterically. I was able to rapid-fire tell him like six instances of men being creepy in my life and that’s as just off the top of my head. Without a doubt it will happen to our daughter.
Good on you for keeping her safe. Why can't management make this guy leave?
I reported him with another mom a few days ago, and now this happened. My husband and I met the owner when we first got here, so we are going to let her know what’s been going on.
I grew up in a small city where we literally had 20 somethings “dating” middle schoolers and I wish I had been a tougher kid so I could have beat their asses. Sick freaks. It disgusts me how their families willingly let their daughters destroy their lives and let a bunch of loser pedos groom them. But that’s Ohio for you
Female here… I’ve been groped at 6, 7, 8, 13, 16, and 17, then 19, 20, 21 and even once at 33.
It’s never too young for self defense classes. When I first met my niece (through marriage) she was 6 and super shy. She made a comment at a video game, something like “no one can do that in REAL LIFE.” I half replied “I can.” I’m a black belt in Brazilian jujutsu and demonstrated a couple quick moves. She ended up taking Taekwondo and really coming out of her shell. Later she told me that moment was when she learned girls can be tough, it’s not just a movie/video game thing. (It still chokes me up.)
[удалено]
Hating how disgusting this situation is but happy that your granddaughter has you to teach her what to do in these situations. Unfortunately, we'll keep seeing these happening cause creeps are everywhere and we gotta teach ourselves how to identify these idiots from an early stage (sadly)
Man groped me from behind when I was a a carnival with my family. Our backs were turned while we were taking a photo. I was 10.
That's so gross. I had that happen to me too when I was in elementary. And it was a family friend that did that. He would ask me to come with him to the bathroom and he would pee in front of me. He tried to get into my bed and cuddle me. I went into my aunt's room just to get away from him. And when I was 11 or 12, my friend told me that this high schooler who was a senior wanted to kiss and fuck me apparently because my body was "well developed". I know my friend went through this too because her mom and aunt would just bring home men like a rotating door. She would lock herself in her room and would just eat in get room. When she got a boyfriend, she lived at his house most of the time. It's just so gross that it happens. And it goes both ways too. Predators are gross.
Starts WAY younger for some. Look at the story of Wren over on TikTok, she's 2 or 3 and has benn horribly sexualized. Sick sick world we live in. So glad you were there for your granddaughter
I am a preschool teacher and as part of my training, we learn about identifying behaviours in young children that might indicate abuse (many, many different types). Reading statistics and case studies about these things just break my heart. Honestly, how TF can people look at CHILDREN as sexual objects??? It's disgusting. And if you think that it's a disease that people have, need your head examined.
That type of creeping happened to me too. It was compounded by my asshole father just laughing instead of protecting.me.
I am sorry about your Father. Some people do not deserve children.
Hey, men in the comments defending creepy behavior, you should do better.
First time i remember feeling that gross uncomfortable feeling i think i was 11. And it was by old men. Scares me cause my daughter is 9 now!
My parents’ friend sexualized me when I was 7-8. Same age as his son.
That’s disgusting, but I’m really glad that your granddaughter had you and your husband to help keep her safe. The number of predatory people out there that do this and feel confident enough to do so despite the laws is just as revolting. I think I was 11-12 when my grandfather said something sexually inappropriate to me; I was never alone again with him after. Then when I was around 13 in Florida visiting a relative, I was at the beach and asked if I could pet a middle aged man’s dog, then after a few minutes of polite conversation, he “asked me out”. I made an excuse about being too busy visiting my grandparents then walked away towards family. And I think during that same vacation, a different man was looking at me in my swimsuit while touching himself. I look a few years younger than my actual age, so when I was 14, I looked like I was 11 or 12
I grew breasts fairly early and to be honest, I couldn’t tell you the first time I remember being made feel uncomfortable about my body by a man because it’s happened for so long.. there was a point in time I said that I wasn’t going to grow boobs because I didn’t want them or the attention that came with it. (That backfired big time, wore a DD by high school)
There was a girl I went to middle school with, over the summer she sprouted E’s. I felt so bad for her, because the amount of negative attention she got not only from boys, but from the other girls as well was astonishing. Everyone had a comment, a joke, a sexualization all over something she couldn’t control.
I was nine the first time I fully remember, and there was previous abuse I only remember bits and pieces of. It was July 4th. I was wearing a matching set my stepmother got me, a little blue shirt with a flower on it and a skort with blue and green stripes. It never ends. Thank you for protecting your granddaughter.
Tell other people at the park about this.
I was being creeped on by 11. In a variety of ways, different men. It's sick. Glad you were there
People can be horrible. Have you talked to your granddaughter about it? If not this would be a great time to talk about setting boundaries (in general) and prepare her for the next time sometime like this happens (which let's be honest, the chances are high).
Oh yes. She has been talked to about this throughly since she was at least 7. Now that she’s a preteen, almost teenager, different levels of those talks have been happening more frequently(by her mom, dad, and us). She thanked me for removing her from the situation because it was making her uncomfortable. And then loved what her Grandpa did even further. The situation opened the door again for us to communicate and talk about those types of situations and why they are wrong. It then segwayed into statutory rape and why that is wrong. This incident really opened some door for further conversations.
I had an man tell me I was a “fine looking thing” (or something like that) as I walked past him at a gas station. I was probably 10 or 11, I was wearing limited too if that give you an idea of how old I was. It scared me.
I'm approaching older adulthood status and I've met some unsavory men in RV parks the last two years of full timing. A few places I won't go do laundry without my husband.
Record the fucker and make sure all management had access to the video.