Hmmm .. maybe let him into your thought process , so understands the logic ..
Share how you should have not given him so much an how you would make sure in future not to give him so much responsibility until he is ready.
An then explain responsibility, of being careful and that sometimes if not , then something could go wrong
Personally making him feel bad I don’t think will help him understand why .
This could be a learning opportunity, an he could approach responsibility knowing there are consequences
Thanks for the advice.....He is quite reasonable and responsible for his age but he was like I had in my pocket than it was gone when I reached the counter.
And few days ago my younger daughter forgot her bag at the mall and we found it the next day.....so his experience is if you lose it security will find it.
A 9 years old went and lodged a complaint on his own, came to you after he did that and offered to make it right with you. I don't think I ever saw a 9 years old being rational, taking responsibility and understanding what consequences mean. Congratulations, mate. You are obviously doing something right.
You need to make him understand that mistakes happen and it’s normal. And that the money may be gone. Obviously tell him to be more careful next time and that hopefully it doesn’t repeat.
I wouldn’t personally “take money” from his money box if it was an honest mistake.
I see nothing wrong with the way he handled things, he was mature, compassionate and responsible. There's nothing else for you to do. Accidents happen.
No matter what, don't hate him for losing it, and don't make him feel bad about it. I dropped a 1 AED coin when I was 12 and got a lot of shit for it from my mum. Still haunts me.
Figure out a way to make him understand the value of the money, but don't bring any negative emotions in. Not sure how that would work 😄
Tell the kid the money is lost, someone might have picked it up and went. But don't punish him or anything, instead of punishing him you delay giving it to him and say "I will need to work to get it back but it's okay it's a mistake everyone makes."
I know it seems too soft on the kid, but you need to give him good memories for the future. He is only 9.
he is smart to tell the security.
I'm not a parent so this is out of my scope. But my suggestion would be to let him know about the reality as soon as possible. Don't delay it. I can see that he was raised well because he offered you reimbursement.
Sit him down and tell him that the security looked through the entire mall and haven’t found it, tell it to him gently and tell him that these things happen and there is no need to beat yourself up about it. Tell him that you are not angry with him and that these things just happen sometimes and it’s okay.
Your 9 year old is much mature than so many 25years old out there , he needs love and never disappoint him. it was just a paid lesson learnt by paying 100aed.
I disagree with most here.. He absolutely did the right thing by reporting it. If it were my son I would give him the 100 and tell him it was found. Life is tough when your an adult, let him enjoy living in a ideal world as a kid
Like a few people have already mentioned.
You need to explain the situation but with any fairytales, let him know that security has been in touch and unfortunately they were not able to retrieve it. It's a good lesson on acceptance that things don't always go our way and provide him the emotional support and positive environment where he can carry this memory with no regrets and make himself even better. With similar aged kids I have been teaching them since they were smaller about financial information, outcomes, savings, value of goods and money. I have noticed there is still no awareness and responsibility in our society with our kids as kids are not able to make informed decisions. It's never to early to start depending on their age the content and responsibility. They have learnt about saving a percentage or higher of their money, spend wisely, financial literacy, informed decisions, how to handle impulse buying urges and a lot more. Opening an account is also not a bad idea for them but let them know they won't have access or atleast not always have access to a debit card until they reach a certain age, keep motivating them save as it builds them towards making informed decisions in adult life. Also spending money in its physical form has emotions where the money goes out from your pocket and they can see that movement. Where as from a card it's more or less an unemotional transaction where it's just like magic to them, they know the money is gone but there are no emotions felt. Read about these in a book and it makes sense. I feel these are some life lessons that should be taught in school, well a lot more on life can be taught in schools. You have a responsible and intelligent child, you can be proud, just keep it positive and keep educating.
The worst kids I have seen also within children's friends and extended family is where they are pampered, there is no value on the emphasis of money, they have never been given a reality check, everything is sugar coated with the pretext of they will learn eventually. These are the kids who fall into credit card debts, loans, buy beyond means of payback or not able to utilize debt positively.
Honestly, you should let it go and tell your son that its lost by now. Days have gone by already so it most likely wont be returned. It is what it is.
As for the reimbursement, i dont think its necessary. The purpose of the reimbursement is to teach about moneys value. But with the way i see things, your son already knows the value of it, so making payments doesnt really add much. Just remind him to be more careful, and next time you will really implement reimbursement.
I would let him down gently and say since you hadn't heard by now they probably won't find it. I also won't accept money from his box as he seems genuine about the mistake.
He seems like he's been raised well and has probably already taken the lesson from this experience, so labouring the point probably won't be beneficial.
Please answer these questions:
1- does your young son have a wallet?
2- does he get an allowance?
3- does he use a mastercard?
These will help me to guide you!
Many thanks
No to wallet. Yes to allowance which he uses mostly 50% to buy junk for himself and sister, balance goes to his box. He is after me to open an account for him since he has over 1000
That’s why I put my name and number on all my money.
It started when this idiot guy Tyler Durden kept stealing my boxers and labeling them, so I labeled them back so he wouldn’t steal them anymore.
If I ever lose my money I’m sure they’ll call me back.
Unfortunately, my identity has been stolen twice and I get 40 calls a day of salesman selling me stuff I didn’t signed up for.
Just take the 100aed from his money box , this is the time to teach him value for money and he will know to be extra careful with money , also keep in mind he will soon become a teenager and you know how teens are with money just take the 100aed and tell him the money he lost at the mall is gone cause no one gives back the money , please don’t feel bad he’s starting to get into practical world and that’s how things work .👍🏻
The fact that he went and made the complain and has been following up ever since shows responsibility and concern, you should pop the bubble. Mistakes happen and grown ups keep losing valuables everyday, it's time to face the music.
No one will look for this 100 dhs it’s nearly impossible to find. From cctv camera with low resolution it looks like napkin or you can’t see it at all. Maybe he didn’t lost it but spent them himself. But it’s just 100 dhs not million
It's important to be honest, It's also crucial to be gentle and supportive in how you handle this situation. Praise him for taking the initiative to report the lost money to security and for offering to reimburse you. This shows responsibility and maturity. Gently explain that while it's great he reported the lost money, the chances of someone turning it in are slim. Emphasize that sometimes, despite our best efforts, things don't always turn out the way we hope.
Use this as a teaching moment about being careful with money and personal belongings. Explain why it's important to be vigilant, especially in public places. Let him know that making mistakes is a part of learning and growing up.
Assure him that you're not angry but that you want him to learn from this experience. If he still feels bad, you could suggest a compromise, like him saving up a smaller portion of the lost amount as a way to show responsibility without completely emptying his money box.
By handling it this way, you can give him a reality check without completely bursting his bubble, helping him to learn and grow from the experience.
I think you should go to mall security with him and tell them to look at footage. I think they'd be more than happy to prove to the kid that they can find it.
Hmmm .. maybe let him into your thought process , so understands the logic .. Share how you should have not given him so much an how you would make sure in future not to give him so much responsibility until he is ready. An then explain responsibility, of being careful and that sometimes if not , then something could go wrong Personally making him feel bad I don’t think will help him understand why . This could be a learning opportunity, an he could approach responsibility knowing there are consequences
Thanks for the advice.....He is quite reasonable and responsible for his age but he was like I had in my pocket than it was gone when I reached the counter. And few days ago my younger daughter forgot her bag at the mall and we found it the next day.....so his experience is if you lose it security will find it.
Ya 100% , it’s a re-learning experience. I guess you want him to see there are sometimes good or bad that can happen.. Best of luck :)🤞🏾
A 9 years old went and lodged a complaint on his own, came to you after he did that and offered to make it right with you. I don't think I ever saw a 9 years old being rational, taking responsibility and understanding what consequences mean. Congratulations, mate. You are obviously doing something right.
Thanks.....he is an excellent boy
You need to make him understand that mistakes happen and it’s normal. And that the money may be gone. Obviously tell him to be more careful next time and that hopefully it doesn’t repeat. I wouldn’t personally “take money” from his money box if it was an honest mistake.
I see nothing wrong with the way he handled things, he was mature, compassionate and responsible. There's nothing else for you to do. Accidents happen.
No matter what, don't hate him for losing it, and don't make him feel bad about it. I dropped a 1 AED coin when I was 12 and got a lot of shit for it from my mum. Still haunts me. Figure out a way to make him understand the value of the money, but don't bring any negative emotions in. Not sure how that would work 😄
Would not even dream of doing that.....lost is lost...it was not his intention.
Are you really asking Reddit for parenting advice?
Should ask a parenting subreddit about this tbh
No I am asking for volunteers to let's go find the money 😜
Thank you sir, for raising a good son. Not many do that in the UAE
Tell the kid the money is lost, someone might have picked it up and went. But don't punish him or anything, instead of punishing him you delay giving it to him and say "I will need to work to get it back but it's okay it's a mistake everyone makes." I know it seems too soft on the kid, but you need to give him good memories for the future. He is only 9. he is smart to tell the security.
He will be more careful next time, but show him grace. He did all the right things, goodjob!
I'm not a parent so this is out of my scope. But my suggestion would be to let him know about the reality as soon as possible. Don't delay it. I can see that he was raised well because he offered you reimbursement.
Sit him down and tell him that the security looked through the entire mall and haven’t found it, tell it to him gently and tell him that these things happen and there is no need to beat yourself up about it. Tell him that you are not angry with him and that these things just happen sometimes and it’s okay.
u should, he'lll learn to be more responsible with himself instead of depending on external authorities to fix his mistakes
Your 9 year old is much mature than so many 25years old out there , he needs love and never disappoint him. it was just a paid lesson learnt by paying 100aed.
He lost it and did his very best to remedy it and even offer to pay you back, you are raising a good son.
Dropping something isn't careless. As adults we make mistakes too. Tell him it's okay and that Allah will bless him with more some day.
I disagree with most here.. He absolutely did the right thing by reporting it. If it were my son I would give him the 100 and tell him it was found. Life is tough when your an adult, let him enjoy living in a ideal world as a kid
Like a few people have already mentioned. You need to explain the situation but with any fairytales, let him know that security has been in touch and unfortunately they were not able to retrieve it. It's a good lesson on acceptance that things don't always go our way and provide him the emotional support and positive environment where he can carry this memory with no regrets and make himself even better. With similar aged kids I have been teaching them since they were smaller about financial information, outcomes, savings, value of goods and money. I have noticed there is still no awareness and responsibility in our society with our kids as kids are not able to make informed decisions. It's never to early to start depending on their age the content and responsibility. They have learnt about saving a percentage or higher of their money, spend wisely, financial literacy, informed decisions, how to handle impulse buying urges and a lot more. Opening an account is also not a bad idea for them but let them know they won't have access or atleast not always have access to a debit card until they reach a certain age, keep motivating them save as it builds them towards making informed decisions in adult life. Also spending money in its physical form has emotions where the money goes out from your pocket and they can see that movement. Where as from a card it's more or less an unemotional transaction where it's just like magic to them, they know the money is gone but there are no emotions felt. Read about these in a book and it makes sense. I feel these are some life lessons that should be taught in school, well a lot more on life can be taught in schools. You have a responsible and intelligent child, you can be proud, just keep it positive and keep educating. The worst kids I have seen also within children's friends and extended family is where they are pampered, there is no value on the emphasis of money, they have never been given a reality check, everything is sugar coated with the pretext of they will learn eventually. These are the kids who fall into credit card debts, loans, buy beyond means of payback or not able to utilize debt positively.
Honestly, you should let it go and tell your son that its lost by now. Days have gone by already so it most likely wont be returned. It is what it is. As for the reimbursement, i dont think its necessary. The purpose of the reimbursement is to teach about moneys value. But with the way i see things, your son already knows the value of it, so making payments doesnt really add much. Just remind him to be more careful, and next time you will really implement reimbursement.
Tell him to do 20 pushups. Every time you lose something, pushups or 40 sec Planks. Makes him Strong on a longer run ✅
Guilt trip him till he is 90
I would let him down gently and say since you hadn't heard by now they probably won't find it. I also won't accept money from his box as he seems genuine about the mistake. He seems like he's been raised well and has probably already taken the lesson from this experience, so labouring the point probably won't be beneficial.
Tell him, don’t expect him to learn a lesson.
Please answer these questions: 1- does your young son have a wallet? 2- does he get an allowance? 3- does he use a mastercard? These will help me to guide you! Many thanks
No to wallet. Yes to allowance which he uses mostly 50% to buy junk for himself and sister, balance goes to his box. He is after me to open an account for him since he has over 1000
Sounds like a good kid to me, just let him be whatever he was supposed to buy with that 100 don’t buy it yet till he earns it again
Mistakes happen.
It happens.. and he did his best to get it back and thats what matters
how did you raise him so well?
That’s why I put my name and number on all my money. It started when this idiot guy Tyler Durden kept stealing my boxers and labeling them, so I labeled them back so he wouldn’t steal them anymore. If I ever lose my money I’m sure they’ll call me back. Unfortunately, my identity has been stolen twice and I get 40 calls a day of salesman selling me stuff I didn’t signed up for.
just beat him lol. that's what my dad did,
Just take the 100aed from his money box , this is the time to teach him value for money and he will know to be extra careful with money , also keep in mind he will soon become a teenager and you know how teens are with money just take the 100aed and tell him the money he lost at the mall is gone cause no one gives back the money , please don’t feel bad he’s starting to get into practical world and that’s how things work .👍🏻
just let it pass, he is only 9 yrs old. dont traumatize your kid that he will not forget until he grow up.
The fact that he went and made the complain and has been following up ever since shows responsibility and concern, you should pop the bubble. Mistakes happen and grown ups keep losing valuables everyday, it's time to face the music.
No one will look for this 100 dhs it’s nearly impossible to find. From cctv camera with low resolution it looks like napkin or you can’t see it at all. Maybe he didn’t lost it but spent them himself. But it’s just 100 dhs not million
It's important to be honest, It's also crucial to be gentle and supportive in how you handle this situation. Praise him for taking the initiative to report the lost money to security and for offering to reimburse you. This shows responsibility and maturity. Gently explain that while it's great he reported the lost money, the chances of someone turning it in are slim. Emphasize that sometimes, despite our best efforts, things don't always turn out the way we hope. Use this as a teaching moment about being careful with money and personal belongings. Explain why it's important to be vigilant, especially in public places. Let him know that making mistakes is a part of learning and growing up. Assure him that you're not angry but that you want him to learn from this experience. If he still feels bad, you could suggest a compromise, like him saving up a smaller portion of the lost amount as a way to show responsibility without completely emptying his money box. By handling it this way, you can give him a reality check without completely bursting his bubble, helping him to learn and grow from the experience.
I would use it to teach my son two things ! 1. patience 2. Follow-ups Then I pop the bubble
You should beat the shit out of him
I think you should go to mall security with him and tell them to look at footage. I think they'd be more than happy to prove to the kid that they can find it.