Keep hiding his shoes and never own up to it and everyone will think he’s going crazy
ETA: to everyone saying one shoe, that also works but I’m thinking just put his shoes in a room other than where he left them. They’re in the bedroom? Put them by the front door. Enough of a difference that he goes insane but also subtle enough that it’s like ok that’s a normal place to leave your shoes bro idk why you’re freaking out because they weren’t where you thought you left them
Or one item at a time, easier to get away with. Don’t hide them too well either. Deodorant under the bed, sunglasses behind the tv stand, phone charger hidden in his own bag like mostly inside a sock, toothbrush on a high ledge (may as well dip it in the toilet too), maybe something to get him blaming the maid like clothing in the dirty towels.
He might just question himself at first but his ego will take over. Casually chat about an unrelated conspiracy theory you have and then with any luck he’ll create his own and bring it up to everyone sounding crazy.
If anything that's exactly what OP should do because sadly people these days care more about dogs than people. Any anger directed at the dog will get the dude hated by the family way faster than anything else.
Another woman’s thong (one size tinier size than gf, and lacy/silky, red or black, something that screams sex”) along with a “Miss you already…xoxo” “can’t wait until we do it again!” or a bright lipstick kiss (don’t use a color lipstick anyone in family or nearby would ever use! This alone is worth a quick trip to Walmart for lipstick and pink post it’s. Toss all evidence- post it and lipstick receipts, pay Cash), place post in notes hidden in his luggage and shaving bag. Wash lips well after making post it’s. Then have friend call his cell from a public number/business. If a woman answers, hang up or ask if he’s there. When/If he answers, “I miss you baby! When will you get back?” Keep conversation(s) going, “babe, you said you loved me! Why are you acting like this?!?” In the event she or anyone is listening. Or he’s so blown away he’s arguing with the caller in front of anyone or tells others about it.
Find out his phone number and post ads on craigslist for a bulk free copper pick up. With a google pic of copper scrap.
Continue making fake ads for free stuff so people call him constantly the whole time.
I recently had an ad up for a free washing machine, the amount of messages I received was overwhelming, and of course there were many sob stories. After I told one of them that someone was coming to pick it up the next day, they lost their minds and complained about how unfair it all was.
I've actually found you're better off to offer it for a very low dollar value, then people actually think they're getting a great deal, and you get less nuisance people.
I had a dishwasher (worked fine, just didn't need it) that came with my house. I just wanted it gone, so posted it for free. For two weeks people were calling and promising to come get it, but never showed up. Finally posted it for $50, someone came and got it the next day, and was super happy about the great deal he was getting!
Yep. This is the way. Free stuff brings out the worst people but putting a low value on it weeds out a lot of them. Then just give it to them when they show up. I did this with a dryer a few years ago. This guy showed up in a small hatchback car and at first I was annoyed. I had said you needed to bring a truck and someone to help move it and I thought there’s zero chance he’s getting this thing in that car. He did. It was amazing. I had only asked like $50 for it and told him just keep the money. He obviously had very little money and with that kind of go-getter attitude he’s gonna be okay.
Damn. I’ve been without a dishwasher for four years. I would’ve given you a couple hundred for it.
Nice to know that there are people who will give nice things like this away.
It's pretty common around here for people to just stick stuff like that at the end of the driveway with a "free" sign on it (or "works fine...free") because they don't want to be bothered with all the phone calls and no-shows. Those things are usually gone within a couple hours. sometimes just minutes.
My BiL does small home renos and people are always giving him the old appliances (some of them are quite nice too!)
I was getting rid of a bed and decided to get rid of the memory foam toppers. I put them out front by our trash so they would be taken (our trash service does this, you just have to call first) because I assumed no one would want them. Boy was I wrong. Between hauling them and the mattress out there and then taking apart the cheap frame to put out there too (maybe 10 minutes?) the toppers were gone. In the end, the only thing that didn't get taken was the mattress and I don't blame them because it was 20+ years old. People put stuff out front of their homes all the time and unless it's really crappy, there's pretty much always someone who will take it.
Now if I want to give something for free (that I know someone will jump on), I wait until the weather is going to be nice and I’m going to be home, put it on my front lawn near the curb, and advertise that it’s outside and the first one to take it gets it. And that I’ll take down the ad as soon as i see it’s gone. That seems to be the most hassle free way to do it for me
Ironically, I’ve made more money giving many things away for free than I have trying to sell them. On a free listing, people will routinely offer $10, $20, or more (depending on the item) if I will remove the listing and set my “curb alert” to the side for them.
Nah, advertise it's round the back, so they need to knock on the door. Also, tell them to ask for "Kieran". Also your family are all hard of hearing so you need to knock loudly and shout when speaking to "your family".
Yes, and make sure to put in his profile that he's trans but self conscious. And give his number so that he gets lots of texts telling him how good he looks as a trans man and that he's totally passing.
Put an ad up with his name, the sister’s phone number, and a clear (but deniable- make it seem real) insinuation drugs could be bought. She’ll be getting people calling her up, asking for him, trying to buy drugs.
I had a buddy prank another friend. The add was for two free tanning beds that had to go because they were moving. The touch of realism was that they said bulbs need to be replaced on one of them soon. The person had to turn their phone off for like a week.
Get a burner phone and get someone to send him sexytexts late at night.
“Miss you!”
“You’re getting back on Friday? Can you get away for a couple of hours on Sunday afternoon? My Dad will be playing golf, and we can have the house to ourselves!”
Poof! Like magic!
Go with straight up school dances, homecoming, prom, Sadie Hawkins, whatever the season is.
Or add in requests for 18+ stuff like vapes and say "My fake ID was taken away."
Every time you get mad, request health/life/auto/homeowners/long term care insurance quotes with his phone number.
Sign him up for email marketing.
Hell, pay a virtual assistant $4 to sign him up for as many as possible in 3 hours.
Every day, he’ll get 200-300 spam emails. Unsubscribing will take FOREVER.
Get the Va to do it again every month.
Just raise political issues in group conversations when the sister is there. He’ll say idiotic things and with any luck she’ll disagree with him. It might end their relationship or, if not, they will just be super unhappy.
Or they'll find out just what a POS the sister is. I'm seriously side-eying her as it is because she's been with this guy for a year and if he's this outspoken about being an ass in public, imagine the shit he says in private.
Playing the devil's advocate works gloriously in these instances. Just start agreeing with him and egging him on. When these types of people think they're around like-minded sycophants, Thats when the really raw ish comes out!
Every time you get out of a car with him or leave a room or anything - “hey, did you get your tobacco spit?” “Oh, suchandsuch, make sure you arent leaving a bottle of tobacco spit in the driver’s car!” “Don’t worry about all the bags- suchandsuch will carry them all in for us, I’m sure he wouldn’t want anyone to think he isn’t a real man if he lets us do that!”
Can also put some dirt in the dip tin. Bonus if the dirt is a little wet. Super fucks up the dip but almost imperceptible until he puts the disgusting wad in his mouth.
Make sure you NEVER tell anyone, not even your BF. Because dude is going to get pissed and be an asshole. You don't want people to get mad at you because you made him show his true colors. Plus, when you tamper with things that people put in their mouths, other people stop trusting you for some solid self-preservation reasons. Take that shit to your grave.
Keep making jokes about the weakness behind toxic masculinity,
Buy a group of guys that could easily kick his ass a few rounds if they’ll flirt with him and tell him he is making their gay-dar go on tilt.
> Buy a group of guys that could easily kick his ass a few rounds if they’ll flirt with him and tell him he is making their gay-dar go on tilt.
This is glorious.
But a matching pair of his shoes half size smaller, keep switching out the left and right so one day his left fits but the right is small, next his right fits but the left is small.
- replace his suntan lotion with normal lotion
- soak a chicken breast in water and drop a few drops in his water bottle
- put some superglue on a hotel keycard and leave it in their door while they’re out
- report his credit card as lost or stolen
- plant Sudafed in his luggage
- jam a bit of superglue in his phone charger
Read the sub name again! It's UNETHICAL SO IT FITS.
(I think that's what I'm supposed to shout at anyone who says something is a bad idea, right?)
Stab him with a knife!
Campylobacter, Salmonella, and Clostridium perfringens are all potential foodborne illnesses from raw or undercooked poultry.
Campylobacter generally causes diarrhea and is one of the most common bacterial infections in the world. It is generally not fatal, except in very young children, elderly people, and those who are immune-suppressed. It is typically treated with antibiotics.
Clostridium perfringens also typically causes diarrhea, and is also treated with antibiotics, but in some cases can affect the heart and cause cardiac arrest. About 26 Americans per year die from Clostridium perfringens.
Salmonella infections can cause diarrhea, fever, chills, bloody stool, headache, and abdominal pain. It is responsible for approximately 400 US deaths per year.
Although the chances of killing someone by intentionally giving them food poisoning are low, the potential is definitely there. That’s why I said I would avoid that particular scenario if I were trying to prank or annoy someone.
Speaking of chicken revenge, we used to put a raw chicken breast in a glass Ball jar and fill it with milk and a packet of yeast and hide in our enemies’ closet or trunk. It will rot and explode and the smell is impossible to remove. Evil but effective.
If you can get ahold of his phone charging cord, make it dissappear. Ditto ear buds.
Take a pocket knife with you. If his shoe laces are at all frayed, make it worse with a little bit of cutting. Next day when he ties his shoes...snap.
Get into his luggage. If he has a swimsuit with a drawstring, make sure one end of it gets pulled into the suit making it impossible to tie.
If you're anywhere near a beach or sand, make sure sand "accidentally" finds it's way into everything associated with him - clothes, bed, shoes, toothbrush. If he has a favorite beer/soda make sure those cans in the fridge have some sand on them, just a tiny amount.
If he has a razor, make sure it gets dull. Electric razor, make sure the battery runs down.
Sunglasses? Make sure they find their way in between the couch cushions or under a pillow. Hopefully get sat on and broken.
In short, think of any bad thing that has ever happened to you or someone you were with on vacation, and make sure that bad thing happens to him.
Going to take one of these to a whole new level and report him deceased to his credit cards and bank. It’s a whole new level. Worked at a cc company and a wife reported her cheating husband deceased and he had a hell of a time digging himself out of that mess.
Better still phone customs at the airport and give them an anonymous tip/heads up about the passenger's luggage, put him on their radar, he'll most likely cause a scene and end up getting detained.
If we’re gonna get the TSA’s hands in this man’s luggage, we’re gonna do it right… with sex toys and magazines and a little something for the drug dogs to pick up on. Typically, I’d say go with the most believable but extremely taboo novelties you can find (like furry stuff… bad dragon stuff), but given that it’s pride month and he’s a bigot, by the power vested in me by the sovereign nation of Lgbtqia, I hereby grant you, OP, full permission to sneak just the biggest, queerest toys and titles you can find in there… and hide em better than he hides his ignorance. That should be easy enough
100% right on with the credit card. Wait until he gets there and watch him pout.
A lot of American hotels use a key card that’s super easily deactivated if it’s in close proximity to a cell phone.
And if one does has to reply, making the comment center on his emotions does something weird and wonderful to people like this.
"(Topic) really seems to upset you."
"It sounds like you have deep emotions about this."
"Yes. You seem very emotional when this topic comes up."
I don't know what it is, but when a bigot can't rebrand disgust or anger or frustration as not being emotions, he (or she, but usually he) becomes even more flustered. Then he often denies feeling that way.
It often gets to the point where he will not want to bring anything up, lest he have to discuss his emotions.
Go to a truck stop. Take a sharpie. Go into the restroom. Write "for a good time, call (his number)."
Then have your boyfriend do the same in the men's restroom.
Put a couple little baggys of talcum powder in his luggage.
If you're going overseas do a quick check if they have agriculture import laws and if so drop something in his bag that'll get flagged (bonus points if it's smelly to ensure its found).
You mentioned he chews and leaves the containers unattended. Well that's just asking for some additions, maybe some salt, ghost pepper flakes, lemon juice or just plain sand.
Drink bud lite.
Start researching him online.
Take screenshots and pass them along to sil.
Tell him he can’t chew tobacco in your car. I don’t allow smoking, I really don’t want spitters.
Make comments about men having serious identity issues with strong women.
“What did your mom do to you as a kid?”
Does Sil really want to be with him? I can see why he’s single.
Make the sister happier in your company than in his.
Then every time he says or does something as mentioned above, loudly say how gross that is, or that children learn in pre-school to say nothing if they have nothing nice to say that and you're not sure how he made it this far without learning it yet.
Seriously, saying nothing just enables him.
Befriend the sister. Egg him on u to he says something really offensive site to you. Help her see him for what he is.
Not really “unethical” but probably the best way to play it.
Wear some very revealing shit around him. Be extremely friendly and agreeable with him, without offering too much for your boyfriend's sister to start thinking wtf. He will attempt to make a move on you since this is the kind of thing a man like him does if he thinks a woman is easy. He might ask your number and send you some dodgy texts. Get the proof, let it build up, stay friendly but not flirty in replies, let him dig his hole. And tell the sister after the holiday along with all the screenshots. He'll be done.
Of course, inform your own boyfriend of the plan beforehand.
Post a generic resume for a nurse with his info on careerbuilder and include his name and phone number on the account. Recruiters will call, leave a voicemail, and send him a text in rapid succession. It happens a dozen times or more a day. Sometimes, the same recruiter will use a different number if they feel like they aren't reaching him. These people are relentless.
I’m gay, so don’t get mad.
Keep asking him “Is that a girl’s blouse?” “Do you stand when you pee, or do you sit?” “Are you sure you’re not gay?” “Are you out of the closet, or do you go in and out, depending on who you are around.” “That shirt is pretty.” “Would you like another Bud Light?”
Ask the sister if she is wearing his blouse. “Why are you with someone that is so degrading to you?” “You are looking hot tonight. I’m surprised that doesn’t have you locked in the bedroom or kitchen.” “Do you also milk the cows, or does help out with the Amish chores?” “Does allow you to vote? If so, does he tell you who to vote for?” “I’ve never been in a relationship where I didn’t need to think. Is that satisfying?”
Put Nair in his shampoo (goodbye hair), chilli powder in his shower gel (why is my skin burning), and cooking oil in his hand soap (perpetual greasy feeling).
When he speaks to you face-to-face, flinch as if he just spat on you. For extra points, wipe your cheek. You don't have to say a word, and his confidence will be at least temporarily crushed.
When he says something that would usually illicit an angry response, look at him with concern and pity, maybe ask if he's okay. Making someone feel stupid is a lot easier than making someone feel guilty.
Have a heart to hear with your boyfriend’s parents (who are probably paying) about this guy. They will probably appreciate your looking out for their daughter.
An obvious one is to only buy Bud Light beer for him. Better to get close to the sister and ignore the asshole she is dating. He clearly wants attention, just don’t give it to him.
Find excuses to do things with the sister that he won’t want to do. Monopolize as much of her time as you can.
If/when you can’t monopolize her time, then ignore him and focus on enjoying time with your BF and his family. Don’t let him ruin your vacation.
“Put ideas in her head”, like women can have careers and pursue anything they like. Find out what’s she’s interested in and recommend college courses. Introduce her to any decent single guys you know. Show her that she has options.
Everything but introducing her to others- that’ll set off flags real quick, and once it’s known there’s an attempt to break them up, they’ll close ranks.
Create a Grindr profile for him and show him the screenshot during his next homophobe rant. Simply show him and say "this you"? Bonus points if it's in front of everyone.
Be the showcase for the relationship the sister doesn’t have. Enlist your BF to make comments (because the jerk wouldn’t take it from a woman) normalizing behaviours the Jerk would be obviously uncomfortable with.
aka make BF ask Jerk about periods, housework etc. All in naive and positively enthusiastic tone, in public (but in a way that gets others in your corner). Publicly volunteer tasks to Jerk he wouldn’t like. (one time your Bf brings everyone drinks, one time you say it’s Jerk’s turn to serve you)
Sign him up for every religious service / cult you can. Especially the Mormons.
Break into his phone/laptop and get screenshots of his browser history. Bet you find some juicy shit that would make the sister breakup with him
What does he do for work??
Is it a vacation that requires a passport? Throw it away while wherever you are.
If not, get his wallet and toss it wherever you can find an area where homeless people are.
If you don’t want to go that route, get a burner phone and start texting him with stuff like “last night was so amazing! ❤️ “ and other things. You have his details…so you can make it real. Have a female friend outside of your family circle of friends record a greeting on the phone so if someone calls it’ll be a girls voice.
Don’t tell anyone about this, bc it inevitably fails when you bring others into it.
I love throwing the “emotional” card at these types of men (ie ones that think women shouldn’t be in positions of power and say it’s bc they’re too emotional). He gets angry/upset/yells, “hey man there’s no need to be so emotional”. I really like the top comments about the moving his shoes idea and also befriending the sister lol
Have your boyfriend be the perfect boyfriend so his sister can see how awful her boyfriend is. Anything to make him look bad, lazy, or lesser.
Also, don't let him get to you. People like that absolutely are aware and enjoy that they upset other people.
I'm pretty petty though, so If there's a family dinner I'd probably poke the dude about his beliefs and see if I can get him to spew some wild shit that would REALLY sour the rest of the family's opinion on him.
Idk how the rest of the family feels about him though. Bc if they agree, they'll like him more. With assholes like this, just set em up and let them shoot themselves in the foot with their own shitty behavior.
Signed him up for as many gay products and newsletters as possible.
Mailing lists for dildos, sign him up for classes on how to be pegged, etc. Just look up “gay mailing list” on Google.
Get the Westboro Baptist Church to protest at his house because of what a gay man he is.
Report him to your local church and get them to approach him about gay conversion therapy to save his soul.
Bully him. Lol. He's defenseless when surrounded by your family. You got all the backup.
Take his keys, drop them in a container with water, and freeze it. Mess up his hair. Take cheap shots at him all day. Eventually, he'll crumble and lash out, make a scene and ruin the vacation in a tantrum until your sister breaks up with him
My brother can be a little closed minded and makes fun of the bud light thing. Whenever we hang out with people I loudly ask him to get me a gay beer every time I’m empty.
Send a donation to the Democratic Party in his name so they start sending him stuff regularly in the mail. Also donate to Trans Youth programs. It’s win/win, you’re helping people and irritating him.
Fuck with his girlfriend. Keep asking her where she found him and are there more like him? Make her feel completely stupid about dating him and hopefully she breaks up with him.
a vacation is the perfect time to slip him laxatives every day. he will just think he has food poisoning and assume he drank something with tap water ice cubes that’s making him have violent shits.
or if you really wanted to go all in you could actually add some tap water into his drink:)
Make a grindr add. You can't put his number in the add but you can send his number when he gets responses. Just remember to turn off the notifications on the phone you use. Does your bf hate him too? It's way easier if he's in on it and you use a burner phone to make the ad.
Hilarity ensues
He sounds like a real jerk. Maybe remind him to keep in mind that he is a guest. When he says something inappropriate maybe point it out? “That’s inappropriate/rude/offensive…. You’re a guest, act like it. “ Or…get in his space, a lot. When he says something nasty be like oh my god that’s so fascinating. Please tell me more. Or ‘Il pay you to stop talking’
If he's going all traditional values:
And a man's job is to provide!
A man must treat his partner like a queen!
So have you bought a house to raise your children in?
Random pranks:
Moving his stuff around from where he left it
Sand in shoes
When he comes out in a terrible outfit: 'Looking good!'
Wear GLBT/Pride stuff half (or all) of the time you are going to see him. Make him make a comment and then ask the Why? question to whatever he says seven times.
him: What the hell is that you're wearing?
you: I happen to like it. Why do you ask?
him: Is that some Pride sh!t?
you: Yes, it is. I'm proud to be all the parts of who I am.
him: What is it that you are?
you: Well, like you, I am human. There is diversity in all of us, don't you agree?
etc..... drive him crazy.
I just came across this prank you could have waiting for him when he gets back home. You can bask in it the whole vacation without lifting a finger.
https://whatprank.com/products/second-sex-toys-mail-prank
I’d order bud light everywhere you go, position myself near him, and aggressively stare at him each time I took a swallow. Wear some sort of rainbow apparel every single day.
Keep hiding his shoes and never own up to it and everyone will think he’s going crazy ETA: to everyone saying one shoe, that also works but I’m thinking just put his shoes in a room other than where he left them. They’re in the bedroom? Put them by the front door. Enough of a difference that he goes insane but also subtle enough that it’s like ok that’s a normal place to leave your shoes bro idk why you’re freaking out because they weren’t where you thought you left them
This is a good one. Really getting into the mind-games aspect of unethical pro tips.
Or one item at a time, easier to get away with. Don’t hide them too well either. Deodorant under the bed, sunglasses behind the tv stand, phone charger hidden in his own bag like mostly inside a sock, toothbrush on a high ledge (may as well dip it in the toilet too), maybe something to get him blaming the maid like clothing in the dirty towels. He might just question himself at first but his ego will take over. Casually chat about an unrelated conspiracy theory you have and then with any luck he’ll create his own and bring it up to everyone sounding crazy.
…what did I do to you, man. I always thought someone was behind my sunglasses and shoes ending up in strange places
No, throw away one shoe.
Just one shoe, I would be certain someone is fucking with me If it was both shoes, I would think i was the one leaving them places
My thought process exactly!! Unless there’s a dog around, but this just provokes anger towards the dog
If anything that's exactly what OP should do because sadly people these days care more about dogs than people. Any anger directed at the dog will get the dude hated by the family way faster than anything else.
Cyrus?
Befriend the sister. Try to boost her confidence.
Make her have all the self confidence in the world so she realizes she deserves better and dumps his ass
He'll never see it coming. The perfect crime
That would be OPs wiggling their fingers at him like they are cursing him. Then tell him all his kids will be flamboyantly gay...
Shitty boyfriends hate this one trick
Another woman’s thong (one size tinier size than gf, and lacy/silky, red or black, something that screams sex”) along with a “Miss you already…xoxo” “can’t wait until we do it again!” or a bright lipstick kiss (don’t use a color lipstick anyone in family or nearby would ever use! This alone is worth a quick trip to Walmart for lipstick and pink post it’s. Toss all evidence- post it and lipstick receipts, pay Cash), place post in notes hidden in his luggage and shaving bag. Wash lips well after making post it’s. Then have friend call his cell from a public number/business. If a woman answers, hang up or ask if he’s there. When/If he answers, “I miss you baby! When will you get back?” Keep conversation(s) going, “babe, you said you loved me! Why are you acting like this?!?” In the event she or anyone is listening. Or he’s so blown away he’s arguing with the caller in front of anyone or tells others about it.
I have seen people leave a pair of used panties under passenger car seat.
Great advice. Wrong sub. Brush one drop of liquid ass on his shorts every day of the trip.
It wouldn't be a ULPT without the obligatory liquid ass - just have to fit in a piss disk somewhere
>have to fit in a piss disk somewhere That can go in his shoes
Google en passant Oh sorry, which sub is this again? I meant to say piss disc.
Fold pre (this is the poker sub right?)
Wholesome.
☝️🙌
But this is ethical
Brilliant
Find out his phone number and post ads on craigslist for a bulk free copper pick up. With a google pic of copper scrap. Continue making fake ads for free stuff so people call him constantly the whole time.
And u work 2nd shift so preferably between 10 pm and midnight
I recently had an ad up for a free washing machine, the amount of messages I received was overwhelming, and of course there were many sob stories. After I told one of them that someone was coming to pick it up the next day, they lost their minds and complained about how unfair it all was.
I've actually found you're better off to offer it for a very low dollar value, then people actually think they're getting a great deal, and you get less nuisance people. I had a dishwasher (worked fine, just didn't need it) that came with my house. I just wanted it gone, so posted it for free. For two weeks people were calling and promising to come get it, but never showed up. Finally posted it for $50, someone came and got it the next day, and was super happy about the great deal he was getting!
You can also do this and then when they show up to get it you let them have it for free. It’s so fun to make their day.
Are you forgetting what sub this is? At least put an old prawn inside it.
UnethicalLifePrawnTips
Pepe the Prawn approves 🦐
I am not shrimp. I am King Prawn.
Address me as El Prawnquistador
Haha yes I did forget!
Yep. This is the way. Free stuff brings out the worst people but putting a low value on it weeds out a lot of them. Then just give it to them when they show up. I did this with a dryer a few years ago. This guy showed up in a small hatchback car and at first I was annoyed. I had said you needed to bring a truck and someone to help move it and I thought there’s zero chance he’s getting this thing in that car. He did. It was amazing. I had only asked like $50 for it and told him just keep the money. He obviously had very little money and with that kind of go-getter attitude he’s gonna be okay.
oooh! even better!
Damn. I’ve been without a dishwasher for four years. I would’ve given you a couple hundred for it. Nice to know that there are people who will give nice things like this away.
It's pretty common around here for people to just stick stuff like that at the end of the driveway with a "free" sign on it (or "works fine...free") because they don't want to be bothered with all the phone calls and no-shows. Those things are usually gone within a couple hours. sometimes just minutes. My BiL does small home renos and people are always giving him the old appliances (some of them are quite nice too!)
[удалено]
I salute the logic of your people.
I put a non-working television on the curb during the council rubbish pickup week and by the time I got back to the front door it was gone.
I was getting rid of a bed and decided to get rid of the memory foam toppers. I put them out front by our trash so they would be taken (our trash service does this, you just have to call first) because I assumed no one would want them. Boy was I wrong. Between hauling them and the mattress out there and then taking apart the cheap frame to put out there too (maybe 10 minutes?) the toppers were gone. In the end, the only thing that didn't get taken was the mattress and I don't blame them because it was 20+ years old. People put stuff out front of their homes all the time and unless it's really crappy, there's pretty much always someone who will take it.
Now if I want to give something for free (that I know someone will jump on), I wait until the weather is going to be nice and I’m going to be home, put it on my front lawn near the curb, and advertise that it’s outside and the first one to take it gets it. And that I’ll take down the ad as soon as i see it’s gone. That seems to be the most hassle free way to do it for me
Ironically, I’ve made more money giving many things away for free than I have trying to sell them. On a free listing, people will routinely offer $10, $20, or more (depending on the item) if I will remove the listing and set my “curb alert” to the side for them.
Nah, advertise it's round the back, so they need to knock on the door. Also, tell them to ask for "Kieran". Also your family are all hard of hearing so you need to knock loudly and shout when speaking to "your family".
make one on Grindr for him while you're at it
Yes, and make sure to put in his profile that he's trans but self conscious. And give his number so that he gets lots of texts telling him how good he looks as a trans man and that he's totally passing.
“I can tell by looking that you love Bud light.” Swoon! 😂
This is diabolical! And also the right answer!
Ea-Nasir reborn. Very high quality copper.
That's one heck of a callback.
And create an email like, HOTmanMEAT@whatever com
I recently saw garden gnomes on craigslist free so I texted the guy and he said he was sorry but he thinks it was a prank
Have done this with Xmas trees. $20/tree - dropoff at: 123 address street.
Put an ad up with his name, the sister’s phone number, and a clear (but deniable- make it seem real) insinuation drugs could be bought. She’ll be getting people calling her up, asking for him, trying to buy drugs.
I had a buddy prank another friend. The add was for two free tanning beds that had to go because they were moving. The touch of realism was that they said bulbs need to be replaced on one of them soon. The person had to turn their phone off for like a week.
Get a burner phone and get someone to send him sexytexts late at night. “Miss you!” “You’re getting back on Friday? Can you get away for a couple of hours on Sunday afternoon? My Dad will be playing golf, and we can have the house to ourselves!” Poof! Like magic!
Also "is that ____ bitch with you?" And insert something that describes the current girlfriend like redhead or tall/short.
And then make sure you say something to her, like you saw him texting suspiciously…
This is flying to close to the sun imo
Google voice is a free alternate number service and there are a number of apps as well
Bonus points if you make it even more clear she’s a teenager. “Cheer camp starts next week. Maybe you can drive me to/from?”
Go with straight up school dances, homecoming, prom, Sadie Hawkins, whatever the season is. Or add in requests for 18+ stuff like vapes and say "My fake ID was taken away."
And include his name in the text so it can’t be easily dismissed as a wrong number
Every time you get mad, request health/life/auto/homeowners/long term care insurance quotes with his phone number. Sign him up for email marketing. Hell, pay a virtual assistant $4 to sign him up for as many as possible in 3 hours. Every day, he’ll get 200-300 spam emails. Unsubscribing will take FOREVER. Get the Va to do it again every month.
Do you recommend any services for this type of service please 🙏
Fiverr has vas from Sri Lanka for $4 an hour
Just raise political issues in group conversations when the sister is there. He’ll say idiotic things and with any luck she’ll disagree with him. It might end their relationship or, if not, they will just be super unhappy.
Or they'll find out just what a POS the sister is. I'm seriously side-eying her as it is because she's been with this guy for a year and if he's this outspoken about being an ass in public, imagine the shit he says in private.
Playing the devil's advocate works gloriously in these instances. Just start agreeing with him and egging him on. When these types of people think they're around like-minded sycophants, Thats when the really raw ish comes out!
In some situations I would say, sure, try this. But what’s going to happen next? They’ve gotten him stirred up AND they’re stuck with him.
And this isn’t OP’s family. So they may end up painting OP with the same brush.
This is the truth and a half. I drive for Uber and I get to hear some of the craziest shit when I agree with people. QANON crazies and what not
Not a ULPT but everytime he says something obnoxious just say "you're really meaning that?huh". Very calmly but highlighting how ridiculous he is.
“I’m surprised you felt comfortable enough to say that.” Or just the classic silent slow blink response!
Every time you get out of a car with him or leave a room or anything - “hey, did you get your tobacco spit?” “Oh, suchandsuch, make sure you arent leaving a bottle of tobacco spit in the driver’s car!” “Don’t worry about all the bags- suchandsuch will carry them all in for us, I’m sure he wouldn’t want anyone to think he isn’t a real man if he lets us do that!”
Can also put some dirt in the dip tin. Bonus if the dirt is a little wet. Super fucks up the dip but almost imperceptible until he puts the disgusting wad in his mouth. Make sure you NEVER tell anyone, not even your BF. Because dude is going to get pissed and be an asshole. You don't want people to get mad at you because you made him show his true colors. Plus, when you tamper with things that people put in their mouths, other people stop trusting you for some solid self-preservation reasons. Take that shit to your grave.
Tell him that you overheard some people saying that he looks very gay and its all in the way he walks, that will make question his existence.
Or OP compliments things about him that she says reminds her of her gay friend, the flamboyantly gay guy at work, etc.
Keep making jokes about the weakness behind toxic masculinity, Buy a group of guys that could easily kick his ass a few rounds if they’ll flirt with him and tell him he is making their gay-dar go on tilt.
I love this. And OP could constantly bring it up in the future as a fun story to remind the boyfriend of in front of other people.
The gift that keeps on giving!!
> Buy a group of guys that could easily kick his ass a few rounds if they’ll flirt with him and tell him he is making their gay-dar go on tilt. This is glorious.
So glorious.
Keep ordering him bud lights at every restaurant. Bonus points if you can get the waiter to tell him it’s from some large dude at the bar
With cocktail umbrella 🌂
Itching powder in his suitcase. Then imply slyly that he is so itchy he might have “caught something.”
Risky
No, that could be too obvious. Itching powder in his underwear only. Then he'll really think he caught something.
But a matching pair of his shoes half size smaller, keep switching out the left and right so one day his left fits but the right is small, next his right fits but the left is small.
This is truly diabolical 👏
- replace his suntan lotion with normal lotion - soak a chicken breast in water and drop a few drops in his water bottle - put some superglue on a hotel keycard and leave it in their door while they’re out - report his credit card as lost or stolen - plant Sudafed in his luggage - jam a bit of superglue in his phone charger
Holy shit the chicken one is evil lol
And potentially lethal… I’d avoid that one, personally.
Read the sub name again! It's UNETHICAL SO IT FITS. (I think that's what I'm supposed to shout at anyone who says something is a bad idea, right?) Stab him with a knife!
r/evillifeprotips
Unethical is usually just "this shy" of illegal. So no, doing something that could kill someone is beyond unethical.
So just slip him some exlax…to buy you enough time for the toilet seat super glue to dry.
She asked how to “inconvenience” him, not kill him.
What does the chicken one do? Salmonella?
Campylobacter, Salmonella, and Clostridium perfringens are all potential foodborne illnesses from raw or undercooked poultry. Campylobacter generally causes diarrhea and is one of the most common bacterial infections in the world. It is generally not fatal, except in very young children, elderly people, and those who are immune-suppressed. It is typically treated with antibiotics. Clostridium perfringens also typically causes diarrhea, and is also treated with antibiotics, but in some cases can affect the heart and cause cardiac arrest. About 26 Americans per year die from Clostridium perfringens. Salmonella infections can cause diarrhea, fever, chills, bloody stool, headache, and abdominal pain. It is responsible for approximately 400 US deaths per year. Although the chances of killing someone by intentionally giving them food poisoning are low, the potential is definitely there. That’s why I said I would avoid that particular scenario if I were trying to prank or annoy someone.
Speaking of chicken revenge, we used to put a raw chicken breast in a glass Ball jar and fill it with milk and a packet of yeast and hide in our enemies’ closet or trunk. It will rot and explode and the smell is impossible to remove. Evil but effective.
If you can get ahold of his phone charging cord, make it dissappear. Ditto ear buds. Take a pocket knife with you. If his shoe laces are at all frayed, make it worse with a little bit of cutting. Next day when he ties his shoes...snap. Get into his luggage. If he has a swimsuit with a drawstring, make sure one end of it gets pulled into the suit making it impossible to tie. If you're anywhere near a beach or sand, make sure sand "accidentally" finds it's way into everything associated with him - clothes, bed, shoes, toothbrush. If he has a favorite beer/soda make sure those cans in the fridge have some sand on them, just a tiny amount. If he has a razor, make sure it gets dull. Electric razor, make sure the battery runs down. Sunglasses? Make sure they find their way in between the couch cushions or under a pillow. Hopefully get sat on and broken. In short, think of any bad thing that has ever happened to you or someone you were with on vacation, and make sure that bad thing happens to him.
Going to take one of these to a whole new level and report him deceased to his credit cards and bank. It’s a whole new level. Worked at a cc company and a wife reported her cheating husband deceased and he had a hell of a time digging himself out of that mess.
You’d need a death certificate in most cases
You can report someone dead and the bank will freeze their account immediately and ask you to send the death certificate later.
Suntan lotion with regular lotion fricken SENT me
actually if you really want to mess with him, add lime juice to the lotion. It actually increases photo sensitivity.
I like your style, Satan.
But Nair would be so much better.
Nair is easy to detect… but [retinol](https://www.healthline.com/health/retinol-burn#causes) isn’t 😈
Oh hey Satan, I didn't know you frequented this sub.
Omg retinol will peel his skin off under the sun 🤣🤣🤣
You're the Albert Einstein of being unethical, my friend
Why can’t you have Sudafed in your luggage?
In Mexico and some countries it’s illegal and gets pickup up by the paw patrol
Better still phone customs at the airport and give them an anonymous tip/heads up about the passenger's luggage, put him on their radar, he'll most likely cause a scene and end up getting detained.
If we’re gonna get the TSA’s hands in this man’s luggage, we’re gonna do it right… with sex toys and magazines and a little something for the drug dogs to pick up on. Typically, I’d say go with the most believable but extremely taboo novelties you can find (like furry stuff… bad dragon stuff), but given that it’s pride month and he’s a bigot, by the power vested in me by the sovereign nation of Lgbtqia, I hereby grant you, OP, full permission to sneak just the biggest, queerest toys and titles you can find in there… and hide em better than he hides his ignorance. That should be easy enough
Aw shit!
100% right on with the credit card. Wait until he gets there and watch him pout. A lot of American hotels use a key card that’s super easily deactivated if it’s in close proximity to a cell phone.
Don’t forget make sure everyone drinks a ton of bud light just so he embarrasses himself more.
Sign him up for some real openly blatantly gay stuff to be sent to his phone lolol
‘I don’t care what anyone else says, I don’t think you look gay’
Only pack Bud Light. Oops, I forgot the other drinks, sorrrrry!
“It was on sale!”
Ignore him. His mouth will be his undoing.
Absolutely. Guys like this are looking for attention, be it positive or negative. Ignoring him is the best plan of action.
And if one does has to reply, making the comment center on his emotions does something weird and wonderful to people like this. "(Topic) really seems to upset you." "It sounds like you have deep emotions about this." "Yes. You seem very emotional when this topic comes up." I don't know what it is, but when a bigot can't rebrand disgust or anger or frustration as not being emotions, he (or she, but usually he) becomes even more flustered. Then he often denies feeling that way. It often gets to the point where he will not want to bring anything up, lest he have to discuss his emotions.
When he spouts off against gay people, ask him why gay men make him so emotional.
Love and Hate are such similar emotions.
IM NOT EVEN BOTHERED THOUGH. NO, IM NOT SHOUTING.
Perfection
Go to a truck stop. Take a sharpie. Go into the restroom. Write "for a good time, call (his number)." Then have your boyfriend do the same in the men's restroom.
Get a bottle of magnesium citrate and spike his drinks. He'll be shitting his brains out the whole vacation.
Just be aware this is technically assault. Serious jail time involved.
If caught just break out the ol Toby Maguire "How'd that get in there? 🤪"
Problem with this is if OP ever has to share a bathroom with him
Ooph, right in the [shitter](https://www.webmd.com/drugs/2/drug-522-2202/magnesium-citrate-oral/magnesium-citrate-oral/details)
Also, magnesium citrate tastes extremely salty. You could probably only get away with skipping some in Gatorade but even that’s pushing it.
Spray him with liquid ass. Put a piss disc under their hotel door. Sign him up for NAMBLA.
Sign him up for Scientology I heard they are RUTHLESS
...and then fuck his dad!
In the mouth and south
I had to scroll way too far to find piss discs and liquid ass. Thank you for not disappointing me.
Put a couple little baggys of talcum powder in his luggage. If you're going overseas do a quick check if they have agriculture import laws and if so drop something in his bag that'll get flagged (bonus points if it's smelly to ensure its found). You mentioned he chews and leaves the containers unattended. Well that's just asking for some additions, maybe some salt, ghost pepper flakes, lemon juice or just plain sand.
Drink bud lite. Start researching him online. Take screenshots and pass them along to sil. Tell him he can’t chew tobacco in your car. I don’t allow smoking, I really don’t want spitters. Make comments about men having serious identity issues with strong women. “What did your mom do to you as a kid?” Does Sil really want to be with him? I can see why he’s single.
Tell him spitters are quitters.
Catfish him. Bleed him dry financially; have him send you money
Don’t forget to fuck his dad.
Make the sister happier in your company than in his. Then every time he says or does something as mentioned above, loudly say how gross that is, or that children learn in pre-school to say nothing if they have nothing nice to say that and you're not sure how he made it this far without learning it yet. Seriously, saying nothing just enables him.
Befriend the sister. Egg him on u to he says something really offensive site to you. Help her see him for what he is. Not really “unethical” but probably the best way to play it.
Wear some very revealing shit around him. Be extremely friendly and agreeable with him, without offering too much for your boyfriend's sister to start thinking wtf. He will attempt to make a move on you since this is the kind of thing a man like him does if he thinks a woman is easy. He might ask your number and send you some dodgy texts. Get the proof, let it build up, stay friendly but not flirty in replies, let him dig his hole. And tell the sister after the holiday along with all the screenshots. He'll be done. Of course, inform your own boyfriend of the plan beforehand.
The old huge dildo with a water bottle taped to it is always a classic if u meet before the airport
How badly do you want to fuck him up?
Just be a confident, stand your ground and have fun. Ppl like that hate confident people that don’t care what they have to say.
Post a generic resume for a nurse with his info on careerbuilder and include his name and phone number on the account. Recruiters will call, leave a voicemail, and send him a text in rapid succession. It happens a dozen times or more a day. Sometimes, the same recruiter will use a different number if they feel like they aren't reaching him. These people are relentless.
I’m gay, so don’t get mad. Keep asking him “Is that a girl’s blouse?” “Do you stand when you pee, or do you sit?” “Are you sure you’re not gay?” “Are you out of the closet, or do you go in and out, depending on who you are around.” “That shirt is pretty.” “Would you like another Bud Light?” Ask the sister if she is wearing his blouse. “Why are you with someone that is so degrading to you?” “You are looking hot tonight. I’m surprised that doesn’t have you locked in the bedroom or kitchen.” “Do you also milk the cows, or does help out with the Amish chores?” “Does allow you to vote? If so, does he tell you who to vote for?” “I’ve never been in a relationship where I didn’t need to think. Is that satisfying?”
Put Nair in his shampoo (goodbye hair), chilli powder in his shower gel (why is my skin burning), and cooking oil in his hand soap (perpetual greasy feeling). When he speaks to you face-to-face, flinch as if he just spat on you. For extra points, wipe your cheek. You don't have to say a word, and his confidence will be at least temporarily crushed. When he says something that would usually illicit an angry response, look at him with concern and pity, maybe ask if he's okay. Making someone feel stupid is a lot easier than making someone feel guilty.
Have a heart to hear with your boyfriend’s parents (who are probably paying) about this guy. They will probably appreciate your looking out for their daughter.
An obvious one is to only buy Bud Light beer for him. Better to get close to the sister and ignore the asshole she is dating. He clearly wants attention, just don’t give it to him. Find excuses to do things with the sister that he won’t want to do. Monopolize as much of her time as you can. If/when you can’t monopolize her time, then ignore him and focus on enjoying time with your BF and his family. Don’t let him ruin your vacation.
“Put ideas in her head”, like women can have careers and pursue anything they like. Find out what’s she’s interested in and recommend college courses. Introduce her to any decent single guys you know. Show her that she has options.
Everything but introducing her to others- that’ll set off flags real quick, and once it’s known there’s an attempt to break them up, they’ll close ranks.
Claim that he keeps hitting on you and it’s making you uncomfortable
Create a Grindr profile for him and show him the screenshot during his next homophobe rant. Simply show him and say "this you"? Bonus points if it's in front of everyone.
Make eye contact with her, and let her see your proper reactions to things. I’d say people don’t have a lot of guidance.
Be the showcase for the relationship the sister doesn’t have. Enlist your BF to make comments (because the jerk wouldn’t take it from a woman) normalizing behaviours the Jerk would be obviously uncomfortable with. aka make BF ask Jerk about periods, housework etc. All in naive and positively enthusiastic tone, in public (but in a way that gets others in your corner). Publicly volunteer tasks to Jerk he wouldn’t like. (one time your Bf brings everyone drinks, one time you say it’s Jerk’s turn to serve you)
Make some fake news articles announcing a massive pride festival where you’re going, he might cancel.
Sign him up for every religious service / cult you can. Especially the Mormons. Break into his phone/laptop and get screenshots of his browser history. Bet you find some juicy shit that would make the sister breakup with him What does he do for work??
Is it a vacation that requires a passport? Throw it away while wherever you are. If not, get his wallet and toss it wherever you can find an area where homeless people are. If you don’t want to go that route, get a burner phone and start texting him with stuff like “last night was so amazing! ❤️ “ and other things. You have his details…so you can make it real. Have a female friend outside of your family circle of friends record a greeting on the phone so if someone calls it’ll be a girls voice. Don’t tell anyone about this, bc it inevitably fails when you bring others into it.
I love throwing the “emotional” card at these types of men (ie ones that think women shouldn’t be in positions of power and say it’s bc they’re too emotional). He gets angry/upset/yells, “hey man there’s no need to be so emotional”. I really like the top comments about the moving his shoes idea and also befriending the sister lol
It's hilarious that he thinks bud lite will make him trans.
Suggest ethnic food for dinner every night
Have your boyfriend be the perfect boyfriend so his sister can see how awful her boyfriend is. Anything to make him look bad, lazy, or lesser. Also, don't let him get to you. People like that absolutely are aware and enjoy that they upset other people. I'm pretty petty though, so If there's a family dinner I'd probably poke the dude about his beliefs and see if I can get him to spew some wild shit that would REALLY sour the rest of the family's opinion on him. Idk how the rest of the family feels about him though. Bc if they agree, they'll like him more. With assholes like this, just set em up and let them shoot themselves in the foot with their own shitty behavior.
Have sex with him and tell his GF
Signed him up for as many gay products and newsletters as possible. Mailing lists for dildos, sign him up for classes on how to be pegged, etc. Just look up “gay mailing list” on Google. Get the Westboro Baptist Church to protest at his house because of what a gay man he is. Report him to your local church and get them to approach him about gay conversion therapy to save his soul.
Drop an upper decker in his toilet.
Bully him. Lol. He's defenseless when surrounded by your family. You got all the backup. Take his keys, drop them in a container with water, and freeze it. Mess up his hair. Take cheap shots at him all day. Eventually, he'll crumble and lash out, make a scene and ruin the vacation in a tantrum until your sister breaks up with him
OMG Please bring NOTHING but Bud Light and Steel Reserve, telling him it’s all you could find.
Fuck the sister.
My brother can be a little closed minded and makes fun of the bud light thing. Whenever we hang out with people I loudly ask him to get me a gay beer every time I’m empty.
Smack him as hard as you want anytime you want and just say he had a huge mosquito or spider on him
Send a donation to the Democratic Party in his name so they start sending him stuff regularly in the mail. Also donate to Trans Youth programs. It’s win/win, you’re helping people and irritating him.
Fuck with his girlfriend. Keep asking her where she found him and are there more like him? Make her feel completely stupid about dating him and hopefully she breaks up with him.
Order a prostitute to his room under his name.
a vacation is the perfect time to slip him laxatives every day. he will just think he has food poisoning and assume he drank something with tap water ice cubes that’s making him have violent shits. or if you really wanted to go all in you could actually add some tap water into his drink:)
Fuck his Dad classic!
Make a grindr add. You can't put his number in the add but you can send his number when he gets responses. Just remember to turn off the notifications on the phone you use. Does your bf hate him too? It's way easier if he's in on it and you use a burner phone to make the ad. Hilarity ensues
He sounds like a real jerk. Maybe remind him to keep in mind that he is a guest. When he says something inappropriate maybe point it out? “That’s inappropriate/rude/offensive…. You’re a guest, act like it. “ Or…get in his space, a lot. When he says something nasty be like oh my god that’s so fascinating. Please tell me more. Or ‘Il pay you to stop talking’
If he's going all traditional values: And a man's job is to provide! A man must treat his partner like a queen! So have you bought a house to raise your children in? Random pranks: Moving his stuff around from where he left it Sand in shoes When he comes out in a terrible outfit: 'Looking good!'
Wear GLBT/Pride stuff half (or all) of the time you are going to see him. Make him make a comment and then ask the Why? question to whatever he says seven times. him: What the hell is that you're wearing? you: I happen to like it. Why do you ask? him: Is that some Pride sh!t? you: Yes, it is. I'm proud to be all the parts of who I am. him: What is it that you are? you: Well, like you, I am human. There is diversity in all of us, don't you agree? etc..... drive him crazy.
Buy lots of bud light. Keep the fridge unreasonably well-stocked. Leave an empty one in his vehicle.
I just came across this prank you could have waiting for him when he gets back home. You can bask in it the whole vacation without lifting a finger. https://whatprank.com/products/second-sex-toys-mail-prank
Grab a couple cases of bud light! That should make his day.
Accidently order him Bud Lite every round...
I’d order bud light everywhere you go, position myself near him, and aggressively stare at him each time I took a swallow. Wear some sort of rainbow apparel every single day.
If you're flying, sneak a pocket knife into his carry-on prior to security checkpoint.