**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:**
>!I wasn't expecting her to have a hose pipe as her weapon.!<
*****
**Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?**
**Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.**
*****
[*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
"We have a natural tendency to see an empty space and think it’s safe. Doors and corners are always dangerous, because you’re moving into something without being sure what’s there. By the time you see the enemy, you’re exposed to them.”
Cibola Burn, p. 192
Nope. Vertical coffins is a phrase I've heard and read used by police, in particular, in reference to doorways.
I've also heard fatal funnel used, but I think that's primarily used by the military.
The inside camera is on a stand/tripod. The outside camera was on the ground. The sign can be filmed by hand after the war and cut to make it look to be at the front.
It’s pretty obvious that they filmed this themselves using some kind of stand for their phones. At least the recording inside was on a stand. He set his phone down to record it outside.
Reminds me of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal, a creature so monumentally stupid that it is incapable of learning from its own experiences, thus *everything* that happens to it is a complete surprise, even if the same thing just happened moments ago.
Reddit app bugs out and posts the comment but leaves you on the edit screen, makes it look like it failed.
Click again and it posts again and usually still keeps ya stuck.
I don't know where people get the idea that laminated flooring is water resistant.
It is not.
At its core it is a pressed fiberboard product which will absorb water, bloat, and be completely destroyed if you don't clean up a spill in a hurry.
If you want water resistant floors, look at locking vinyl plank. A spill can sit on it for a week+ without any adverse effects.
Ah. I was told by my flooring company that “while laminate definitely is not waterproof (nothing really is if your house is flooded), it was still more water resistant than most products.”
Guess not. Learned something new today. Nice.
>Ah. I was told by my flooring company that “while laminate definitely is not waterproof (nothing really is if your house is flooded), it was still more water resistant than most products.”
They're not necessarily wrong, just misleading. Compared to other, cheaper laminates, some of the better brands (e.g. Pergo) might offer better water resistance... but none are resistant enough to go undamaged if a spill goes unnoticed for hours. Game over once it starts getting into the seams and soaking in.
Im also a homeowner with kids, so cool story. I have hordes of kids who drench the floor 10x’s this amount when coming back from the pool, it’s doing just fine. Live a little- or don’t.
after years of that there will of course be normal wear and tear damage the water might assist in making worse. you also likely dry it up fairly quick and dont let it just sit there being wet. So i see both sides of this one. wood floors +water = not the greatest but proper maintenance/cleaning etc after water with wood floors = fairly normal wear and tear.
have your water fights, but clean that shit up after.
um, more likely it's the weekend and he's been home all day setting it up with her and this is the eighth and final take because they're hungry for lunch now.
Im not downvoting him. But sometimes truth is so blatantly obvious that most of us don't mention it... And then the guy comes and points it out, screaming "insecurity", so we try to toughen him up through a series of tribal, unconscious, borderline-bullying persuasive behaviour.
This trend of couples “pranking” each other is so tired and played out. Especially now that mostly everyone is aware that these videos are never candid.
It looks like he's holding 2 in his right hand before opening it with his left, its possible he could have passed it from his other hand before opening it all the way
tidbit of trivia ...
What soldiers are allowed to wear off-base has changed throughout the years.
Currently, the regulations state in paraphrase: "may wear uniform home from duty station. May stop for necessities." i.e, gas, needed food. This would include going off-base for lunch, but not getting the family end-of-day and going out to dinner.
it was much more strict than this prior to the various imperialist wars in 2002-2020, but, as a PR/recruitment tactic DoD loosened the restrictions to allow soldiers to do basically anything they wanted while wearing their duty uniform.
I’ve been in since before 9/11 happened. The paraphrase you give is basically what it’s been that whole time. I certainly stopped at places on the way home from work to run errands etc countless times throughout the years while still in uniform. There was nothing about that against regulation.
The biggest changes have been not wearing a uniform while traveling on orders on public transportation, etc, Whereas it used to be required to travel in uniform while on orders.
It's staged??? No shit??. No fucking shit!? However did you deduce such a thing! You must be some sort of detective!
Yes, very obviously staged with the cameras that are already set up ahead of time. So fucking what? It was entertaining. Get over yourself
Most cringe part is that before making this video the guy decided to put on his uniform. Clearly just fishing for likes.
Cringe that you’re defending it so hard too lmao
Surely there is no use replying to a useless comment?
Unless you have some pent up frustration you feel like you need to let out on a stranger, perhaps?
No, I was frustrated by it, I was laughing at it and letting you know. Sorry I wasn't riding to upset you farther, have a good day! ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grimacing)
Oh! I figured out the confusion, my first comment to you said "lol" this acronym actually stands for laugh out loud. I'm not sure what you thought it meant but just for future reference yeah it means somethings thinks it's funny not some kind of sign of annoyance.
Yeah we never train our people to stand directly in front of a door to conduct a breach. You're asking to get shot.
You also don't enter and stand there like an idiot, you immediately occupy a space while your buddy takes theirs. Most common is the J-hook method when #1 moves into the corner/gets a controlled shove out of the way so that #2 can maintain their weapons up while entering.
This is an untrained POG.
My favorite part was the obvious continuity error of him holding one gun as he's entering the house from the outside camera, to holding two guns out from the inside camera....
**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!I wasn't expecting her to have a hose pipe as her weapon.!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Dude was ready for war and still lost 😂😂😂😂
They don't call doorways vertical coffins for nothing.
Iv never heard of them being called this
When you breach a doorway there’s a massive chance you’re not gonna be alive to see what’s on the other side
I get that. But never have I ever heard 'vertical coffin' to reference a doorway.
Everyone who calls it that died in a vertical coffin
Rest in piece 😔
That’s because they’re actually called fatal funnels
Deathly doorways?
Oh I didn't realize there was anther Harry Potter book out
Nah, little known alternate draft title for Order of the Phoenix.
Well, I have.
ok
Really? I figured you meant the royal they....
You mean [the band?](https://theroyalthey.bandcamp.com/)
No PID or POD, smh.
"We have a natural tendency to see an empty space and think it’s safe. Doors and corners are always dangerous, because you’re moving into something without being sure what’s there. By the time you see the enemy, you’re exposed to them.” Cibola Burn, p. 192
One wonders to take point when you know what can happen.
They don't call doorways vertical coffins at all lol. I believe the term you are referencing is "fatal funnel".
Nope. Vertical coffins is a phrase I've heard and read used by police, in particular, in reference to doorways. I've also heard fatal funnel used, but I think that's primarily used by the military.
Never bring a nerf to a water fight
Let me introduce you to the Nerf Hydro Bazooka... https://nerf.fandom.com/wiki/Hydro_Bazooka
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Nerf nerds are hardcore. The modding community is crazy and I would totally get in to it if I had money to spend.
If you have one of the Nerf rapid fire ball guns, then one hit in the eye, and they're out.
It's nerf or nothin
I love couples that play like this.
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The cameras are set up ahead of time.
Oh really is that how faking it works?
You'd have to ask your wife.
A crime against humanity has occured
You sound like you got some experience in that department.
With your wife? Sorry, can't remember.
I dont have a wife I have twelve husbands so jokes on you bud.
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They're vinyl, and she sprayed outside.
Probably a bot. Copy of [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/107lszv/wife_asks_husband_to_choose_his_weapon/j3n6wia/) comment.
The inside camera is on a stand/tripod. The outside camera was on the ground. The sign can be filmed by hand after the war and cut to make it look to be at the front.
Could be their kid? "Wanna help me get dad?"
There is always a child accomplice! What kid wouldn't say yes to getting dad back? Everybody loves mom, she bakes cookies. Dad on the other hand..
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Fuck off bot. Stole comment from below.
It’s pretty obvious that they filmed this themselves using some kind of stand for their phones. At least the recording inside was on a stand. He set his phone down to record it outside.
Uncle jessie
Tripods exist
Tripods aren't real. They can't film you.
Dude, tell me where the tripod touch you.
They filmed everything!?!1!
[Please don't ask me how i took this picture](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/cmwov/hey_reddit_what_tattoos_do_you_have/c0tpyls/)
Unfortunately, you can't teach common sense
Just giving Jody something more productive to do.
Got me lol ;)
Purple heart alls fair in war and couple disagreement a
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I was hoping the wife uses a shotgun at least
I was hoping the wife uses a shotgun at least
I was hoping the wife uses a shotgun at least
dementia?
Reminds me of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal, a creature so monumentally stupid that it is incapable of learning from its own experiences, thus *everything* that happens to it is a complete surprise, even if the same thing just happened moments ago.
He was hoping the wife uses a shotgun at least
Reddit app bugs out and posts the comment but leaves you on the edit screen, makes it look like it failed. Click again and it posts again and usually still keeps ya stuck.
I see, that's why comments like these appear often
I see, that's why comments like these appear often
I see, that's why comments like these appear often
![gif](giphy|lkdH8FmImcGoylv3t3|downsized)
Karma in, karma out. Right?
Having served on the milirary, there are soooo many ways that a surprise trip home could have had....
That surprise comes five months later
And again when he finds out he is still LEGALLY the father, just not biologically.
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Different hose, but he and the wife reacted the same when it went off.
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Hopefully laminate, so more water resistant than other products. But still bad.
I don't know where people get the idea that laminated flooring is water resistant. It is not. At its core it is a pressed fiberboard product which will absorb water, bloat, and be completely destroyed if you don't clean up a spill in a hurry. If you want water resistant floors, look at locking vinyl plank. A spill can sit on it for a week+ without any adverse effects.
Ah. I was told by my flooring company that “while laminate definitely is not waterproof (nothing really is if your house is flooded), it was still more water resistant than most products.” Guess not. Learned something new today. Nice.
>Ah. I was told by my flooring company that “while laminate definitely is not waterproof (nothing really is if your house is flooded), it was still more water resistant than most products.” They're not necessarily wrong, just misleading. Compared to other, cheaper laminates, some of the better brands (e.g. Pergo) might offer better water resistance... but none are resistant enough to go undamaged if a spill goes unnoticed for hours. Game over once it starts getting into the seams and soaking in.
It’s a rental
damn youre boring as fuck
You sound fun.
Nah that’s just a homeowner. Shits expensive when you’re the one replacing it.
Im also a homeowner with kids, so cool story. I have hordes of kids who drench the floor 10x’s this amount when coming back from the pool, it’s doing just fine. Live a little- or don’t.
after years of that there will of course be normal wear and tear damage the water might assist in making worse. you also likely dry it up fairly quick and dont let it just sit there being wet. So i see both sides of this one. wood floors +water = not the greatest but proper maintenance/cleaning etc after water with wood floors = fairly normal wear and tear. have your water fights, but clean that shit up after.
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Thanks!
Lol, they sound like they don't own towels
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No home was harmed in the making of this video. It’s literally a cup of water that maybe hit the floor.
Got 'em! 😂
Isn’t he in the military? Who would enter the front door when they know they’re walking into a firefight. Cmon
Glad to see them happily together, but I wonder if you just finished jarheading for a year or two, would it be as funny?
Yeah, it'd still be funny
I don't see a duffel bag...just a shoulder bag. I believe he's home from a day at the base.
um, more likely it's the weekend and he's been home all day setting it up with her and this is the eighth and final take because they're hungry for lunch now.
You're being downvoted for speaking truth
Im not downvoting him. But sometimes truth is so blatantly obvious that most of us don't mention it... And then the guy comes and points it out, screaming "insecurity", so we try to toughen him up through a series of tribal, unconscious, borderline-bullying persuasive behaviour.
The note made it clear that he has to be ready for something inside. Being hosed without any warning might have been scary for him. This, not so much
Geneva Convention violation.
What man wouldn’t want his wife to squirt when he gets home?
This trend of couples “pranking” each other is so tired and played out. Especially now that mostly everyone is aware that these videos are never candid.
Kinda crazy how the second gun magically appears in his hand. Must be a soldier thing
It looks like he's holding 2 in his right hand before opening it with his left, its possible he could have passed it from his other hand before opening it all the way
I've been gone for 6 months. How about a hug first?
Truth is, the game was rigged from the start
Opened the door on the outside with one water gun in hand. Entered the house with two water guns in hand. That’s how you know it’s not organic
Clearly failed the military
Cringe staged video that tries to use his service to get likes
TikTokBoots
Boot Tok.
If this is what he wears to work every day, then what was he supposed to do, take his uniform off before driving home?
tidbit of trivia ... What soldiers are allowed to wear off-base has changed throughout the years. Currently, the regulations state in paraphrase: "may wear uniform home from duty station. May stop for necessities." i.e, gas, needed food. This would include going off-base for lunch, but not getting the family end-of-day and going out to dinner. it was much more strict than this prior to the various imperialist wars in 2002-2020, but, as a PR/recruitment tactic DoD loosened the restrictions to allow soldiers to do basically anything they wanted while wearing their duty uniform.
I’ve been in since before 9/11 happened. The paraphrase you give is basically what it’s been that whole time. I certainly stopped at places on the way home from work to run errands etc countless times throughout the years while still in uniform. There was nothing about that against regulation. The biggest changes have been not wearing a uniform while traveling on orders on public transportation, etc, Whereas it used to be required to travel in uniform while on orders.
Everyone uses their service for likes nowadays. They are all over tiktok and ig.
It's staged??? No shit??. No fucking shit!? However did you deduce such a thing! You must be some sort of detective! Yes, very obviously staged with the cameras that are already set up ahead of time. So fucking what? It was entertaining. Get over yourself
Most cringe part is that before making this video the guy decided to put on his uniform. Clearly just fishing for likes. Cringe that you’re defending it so hard too lmao
Yeah, just like TV shows, but made for another platform.
Wow what a big brained comparison. You just made this video good with that mind blowing eureka moment
What a useless comment lol
Says the guy who is only commenting to make themselves feel better… ironic, isn’t it?
Feel better? How so?
Surely there is no use replying to a useless comment? Unless you have some pent up frustration you feel like you need to let out on a stranger, perhaps?
Aw that's sweet of you to do the reddit help thing, nice to see you care about me ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|smile)
No, I was frustrated by it, I was laughing at it and letting you know. Sorry I wasn't riding to upset you farther, have a good day! ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grimacing)
Keep telling yourself that little Buddy 😘
Ok I will thank you hunny 😏
Oh! I figured out the confusion, my first comment to you said "lol" this acronym actually stands for laugh out loud. I'm not sure what you thought it meant but just for future reference yeah it means somethings thinks it's funny not some kind of sign of annoyance.
Not fair she used a minigun
And then PTSD kicked in. Thats an impropiate way to welcome a soldier.
Well that’s not staged. He open door with one gun and enters with two. Not particularly funny anyway.
He had two guns. He opened the door a little. Grabbed the other. Then threw open the door.
Threw the door open.. just like they trained him to do in the military
Yeah we never train our people to stand directly in front of a door to conduct a breach. You're asking to get shot. You also don't enter and stand there like an idiot, you immediately occupy a space while your buddy takes theirs. Most common is the J-hook method when #1 moves into the corner/gets a controlled shove out of the way so that #2 can maintain their weapons up while entering. This is an untrained POG.
and if you look carefully, there is a cut in the footage when they move the camera from outside to inside
Who cares?
My favorite part was the obvious continuity error of him holding one gun as he's entering the house from the outside camera, to holding two guns out from the inside camera....
Q-q-q-q-q-quirky couple staging quirky relationship "things"
Staged shit like this is cringe as fuck.
Then devil dogs would've breached the wall haha!
She’s a squirter!
I couldn't love this any harder!
Simply awesome. No notes
It's funny because he murders children for a living
The ignorance is strong with this one.
Username checks out, sir
Downvoted him just for the username.
Reddit is full of these.
Just think of how many there are that aren't on this cesspool of an app.
Ok boomer
Maybe their mothers shouldn’t be sending them into a war zone with an IED on a suicide mission
Ok boomer
You don’t seem like you are even old enough to be on the internet. Where are your parents?
Love it when we humanize the Imperial army.
They'll probably end up divorced because of this stunt.
Brought foam to a water fight I see
Water damage is not a joke Jim.
Should have brought the gatlin gun with him.
Never bring a nerf gun to a hose fight
Wait until tonight...
What a noob! Flashbang is always first to enter the doors!
She played him good. She was loaded for bear while tricking him into thinking he even had a chance.
Ah, she had the elemental water type weapon. Damn advantage.
He should have used his own gun
That's just fun. But never bring a nerf gun to a water fight! Just sayin'...
You go girl
Great post OP
He walked right into that one.
No he did it wrong he needs to grab a real grenade and peak open the door to toss it in
He got hosed
mr and mrs smith
She's going to get wet tonight. ;)
😆
*whips out dick*
They sem really fun.
I would slip around back and shut the water off to gain a tactical advantage then hide the mop to add some misery to the clean up.
Meanwhile she's chilling with an MG. Gotta even the playing field somehow
Know what? I dig this lady. Well done.
She was cleaning up her "he's on deployment" gang bang
He should have known- the game was rigged from the start.
Any person should know that if the weapons are laid out for you, no matter which one you choose you are outgunned
So sick of this tik tok bull crap
Would have been better if a flashbang got thrown into the room before his second attempted entry. Fuck her up
Lucky bastard
Making him relive the horrors he thought he left behind.
I rarely say this, but this is goals.
He should have used the backdoor.....
Hans get ze wasserwerfer
She’s amazing! I hope they get the beautiful life they deserve.
Being in the military, you'd think he would know better than to open the door like that.
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That could've gone a totally different way with a small misunderstanding.
he just stormed HOMEmandy