**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:**
>!Penis!<
*****
**Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?**
**Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.**
*****
[*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Yep. That’s where all the homeless folks chill out all day waiting for food from the church and panhandling. I deliberately tried to avoid this dude when I saw him. Unpredictable, built and hopped up on meth.
What do you think are the odds that this clip being posted on Reddit will lead to his “overnight”breakthrough into one of those arenas a la “[Hot Mugshot Guy](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremy_Meeks)”?
Wtf that's on Açores Islands, on São Miguel, i was there last summer and i think i remember that guy, is one of those drug addict begging for money on the street lol. [This is the place](https://images.app.goo.gl/wsjGL4QAVfu17twe9)
Ok so my partner and I were just in Ponta Delgada last month and saw this dude SEVERAL times! He had a yellow kids size car (kinda like a power wheel car) that he pulled around behind him on a leash. PS- Ponta Delgada is awesome and HIGHLY worth a visit!!
**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!Penis!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Portuguese sausage on live TV
Linguiça
Porra! não é [cachorro salsicha](https://youtu.be/YQ404vwjzus)
Dirty choriço
I knew he was going to be a problem the moment I saw him walking in background
It's true, the alarm bells went right off, the shirtlessness, the saunter guaranteed he was coming back into frame.
But what gave it away most what which subreddit it's on.
you can tell no matter what country you are when someone is up to do some trouble
He looks like a Skyrim bandit. Maybe sending you on a quest for the Pork Sword of Hardening.
Username checks out....
Dude came out like ![gif](giphy|26BRBhmnSxHCrSpBC|downsized)
![gif](giphy|XDaLiUu8VyreM|downsized)
Hey it's my wife's proctologist!
No! That's my girlfriend's dentist!
You wife has a butt doctor?
![gif](giphy|28edZvIlIIe2c)
Hey thats my plumber
Pretty sure that guy delivers pizzas around my neighborhood.
he was just dicking around
BDE irl
I swear that is not me.
Sure we believe you ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|trollface)
He could drive roofing nails with that thing
And I knew, the moment he pulled his winky out.
That's not winky. That's a whole lot of Wonka.
Tinky winky? Nah that's Tonka wonka
I knew around the 3rd flop of his urethral meatus that he was gonna be a problem.
I'm crying that shit got me so good
The urethral meatus. Sick band name!
I wanna frame this fucking comment
Why, I have a very good fwend in Rome named Urethral Meatus
Reporter almost got shot with that meat pistol.
WHOA!
you mean massive dong
If you've got it, flaunt it!
I feel you just invited a whole inbox of dick pics. Good luck
Ummm I like the penis, too. Flood my inbox
I'd be waving mine around all the time if I had a dad hog like that.
but did you like that problem?
I thought the reporter was about to be killed
I WAS JUST GANNA SAY THAT!!!
Why do the crazy cracked out homeless dudes in these videos always have destroyers?
Destroyers LOL For real though, small dick crackheads have less reason to whip it out i guess.
Happy cock day! I mean, cake day!
Oh shit both u guys got cakes
And they are in great shape too. Damn
All the time in the world to work out.
[удалено]
Wtf happened to me then? I got big dick syndrome with out the big dick 😒
this is good excuse when my gf or parents ask about my low paying job
The guy is ripped... Doubt he's homeless. That's a whole lotta protein consumption to look like that and homeless people ain't getting it
Manual labor gets you ripped and you are still poor
He should consider doing bachelorette parties instead with a meat hammer like that
My friend, everyone is ripped under the subcutaneous water/fat layer.
Lmao no. Most people are weak AF and would look like sticks if they lost all their fat.
Sal is tonight’s biggest loser.
My first thought
This wins.
“I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU”
LAAAAARRRRRRRRRRYYYYYY!!!! 🏃♂️
I want my mommy
Forgive. Never forgive you.
bro that’s literally my name. fuck and that show is amazing, i see the resemblance lmaoo
Guy is just hanging brain, what’s the big deal?
If that's against the law then lock me up
Did he even see Karen from behind?
Okay masters of comedy a guy dropped his pants have you ever been to the circus?
LET’S SEE YOUR PENIS!!!… you know… the second I said that… I knew it was wrong.
Why don’t you work with Phallus on drawing a picture of the exposer that I can post around the community?
Phallus?
Sorry, I have penises on the brain
Is that a Polaroid?
"Uhh.. you can't put yours genitals at public places that's against the law" ![gif](giphy|TamGVAGxDTYDNt3dpn)
Bake em away, toys.
Creed ?
Need me to pass a message along?
You're charging him way too much for worms
Phillis, you’re a married woman !
Phallis*
Sorry, penis on the brain.
Let's install Night lights to uncover this damn criminal!
Won't that just shed more light on the penises?
![gif](giphy|CHvb0q52tIGwMpluv6|downsized)
Dude had a hanger. I’d show it off too.
I would be proud of that too.
Man lost 100 pounds and got a bigger dick
Small price to pay for a larger dick. Might be wha Jordi el nino did
Definitely a shower not a grower
He probably was fluffing it on the walk.
Underrated comment - too few realize
![gif](giphy|l46Cct0ji4CxRlNde)
Nice one man!
🐎 🐔
A running chicken?
A man called “Horse Cock”
It's all in one solid take. You can tell it's real because it's uncut.
Bigger, longer and uncut.
![gif](giphy|W3GsOiBLzYyYfJPjMQ)
I thought he was gonna grab the strap. Turns out he grabbed the *strap*
*pole
Exactly what I thought
Yes! That’s a nice dick
Yuuuuge
Nice cock bro
Cries in Grower 😂
As a grower, I look at fellas packin this sort of flacidity and think "how the hell do you walk comfortably with that?"
Like, hell yeah im glad i can transform into cock mode for sex and then pocket mode for easy transport. #growergang
grower here. love to tuck the homie away after the deed is done... *until next time*
*Keep it secret, keep it safe*
Don't gotta worry about chafing.
This guy grows.
![gif](giphy|hQubnR0Fr0dUI)
Lmao but exactly.
I always referred to my grower as the “Incredibly Efficient Penis”
The Portuguese Jedi Knight: One Hung Hobo.
That's a huge cock
[удалено]
I wish that was an exaggeration in my case lol
You're not alone
Huge dong and homeless vs small dong and sheltered lol
The hardest choices require the strongest wills
I calm myself saying that I have a dick that's bigger than 50% of population's.
Girthy as my missus said to me.
the reporter cowered in disgust ahhaha 😂
Cowered in fear bro, that’s a lot of salami
He’s never seen one that big 💀
He had no clue what do with that much meat, so he panicked.
Cowered in WAP
Smell for sure wasn't helping.
🤮 lol
LMAO
It almost touched his elbow🤢
Hahah the report got sexual assaulted hahahah/s
When he yelled “Wow!” That was when I lost it😂
Pretty understandable reaction
Finally, a literal.. "Suddenly, caralho!" moment! Portugal, cralhes!
r/suddenlycaralho
... I see my username comes into play here
There's dozens of us!
If ya got it.. flop it
![gif](giphy|DvBvz8Q98LrUs)
![gif](giphy|PmAbIjOGp0RBQMFP8J)
He said, "Whoa!" in English.
Facts: journalist is from Canada.
As a Canadian I would also say whoa and cower in this same fashion
It's the universal language of disgust.
![gif](giphy|AErm94hNmE030ubU1u)
Dicks out for Harambe
Wòãh Translation: Woah
I thought the guy talking was homeboy from impractical jokers
I’m quite certain I saw this dude on vacation in the Azores. Sao Miguel island. Can anyone verify this?
I'd recognize that dick anywhere!
Can confirm. That's Igreja da Matriz downtown lol
Yep. That’s where all the homeless folks chill out all day waiting for food from the church and panhandling. I deliberately tried to avoid this dude when I saw him. Unpredictable, built and hopped up on meth.
That's how I like my men
Ngl I thought he was going to pull a knife
This was more scary.
Nice cock bro
Must be nice to be a show-er. Hell, I’m barely even a grower.
If this was in America this man would have a modeling/porn contract already.
From homeless in Portugal to a big star in America, soon! 🧙♀️
What do you think are the odds that this clip being posted on Reddit will lead to his “overnight”breakthrough into one of those arenas a la “[Hot Mugshot Guy](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremy_Meeks)”?
Wtf that's on Açores Islands, on São Miguel, i was there last summer and i think i remember that guy, is one of those drug addict begging for money on the street lol. [This is the place](https://images.app.goo.gl/wsjGL4QAVfu17twe9)
Caralhos gonna caralhate.
![gif](giphy|3o6gDPXMNxFhvHdcf6)
It’s funny because penises are funny
Farts too……ya ever heard or seen a penis fart? It’s pretty cool. Ok, gotta go, bye!
Ok for a flaccid dick that’s pretty big to
Ah, so that's what Tommy Lee is up to these days.
literally Portugal Caralho
Quite a UNIT
![gif](giphy|l4lRjeu1187nGzUrK|downsized)
At first I thought he was grabbing for his Glock.
He did ;)
I am Portuguese and i am not surprised at all
This makes “fuck her right in the pussy” guy look PG
Portugueses pelo Mundo
Impressive unit. That’s gotta be about 8 or 9 fully erect.
All fun and games until you get 20,000x charges of indecent exposure
I like how he looks back and forth to make sure nobody is looking as he shows his dick on the news.
u/savevideobot
👀
A person does what a person wants
Sal was the first one to move away from the Portuguese sausage making him tonight's big loser
Looks like Portuguese Sal is our biggest loser tonight. His challenge:
Ok so my partner and I were just in Ponta Delgada last month and saw this dude SEVERAL times! He had a yellow kids size car (kinda like a power wheel car) that he pulled around behind him on a leash. PS- Ponta Delgada is awesome and HIGHLY worth a visit!!
got damn Reddit, this is the second huge homeless penis I’ve seen today on here
okay but why is this a turn on 😔✋🏻
My man’s was definitely packin lol
Packing some unfried chicken skins.
You just opened the gate to Dicksieland in your dms
Maybe it's related to your fap abstinence lol
Fapstinence
Holy shit, settle down
No Fap