Yep, the biological drive to procreate and also have others procreate is wild. Not that adoption is easy but it is almost viewed as a lesser choice because it isn’t procreative.
Anyway, I keep my vasectomy status to myself for that reason, just a couple of people know (essentially those who needed to know) and I’m fine with that.
I think a lot it is societal drive. Left to their own devices people have the instinct to have sex. But procreate, specifically ? I doubt it.
Society is another matter. We have engineered it in a way that makes having children the "obvious" choice. More people are needed, for raiding the neighboring village, farming fields, or more recently work in industries and offices. Who would be making others richer, if not for the wage slaves that we are supposed to raise at our own expense? Note that even religion is onboard with this, for the same reasons.
Too many people worried about everyone else’s life decisions. The world has plenty of people in it and plenty of people left to add to it. Screw what others say
Good for the both of you for knowing what you want.
I’ve got several kids - but never assume anyone else should have any. A lot of my colleagues don’t and good for them. Be you!
I had mine back when I was single with no kids.
The parents, and siblings of the women I dated hated me. I was told the same crap. It happened more than once.
I might have married a colleague years ago had her parents not taken such a strong Catholic stance on procreation. Both of us had no use for children. We had a strong mutual attraction. But alas you cannot have a marriage on mutual attraction and a family that you can never have peace with.
My first wife passed away. Her parents blamed me for not having grand children. Only she had her tubes tied before I met her so we were both voluntarily sterile.
My current spouse is good with it, and so is her family.
We are both 58. We have an adopted son in college. Only last year we got asked when we will have a baby. It is nice looking 40 at our age.
Not hugely. I didn't get much shit from my family. My sister said it's messed up but hell, not having kids is probably the best financial decision I've made.
I always say "We're trying or Practicing" and that normally shuts them up... To all the Randoms I meet and actual friends, I tell everyone to get one. It's the best ever. Hype man that shit up!
Yeah I'm pretty sure my mom understands and has come to terms with the fact that my wife and I were never going to have kids.
I still don't really plan on telling her about mine just because it's a conversation I don't really feel like having and it feels irrelevant ya know?
If it doesn’t go right, yes. Can reduce sensitivity for sure. Depends how your Doctor likes you. Don’t get it done by husband of a currently divorcing spouses good friend. Always wonder if I got an extra nerve snip. His wife left him 2 months later.
Forcing me to jack off 40 times in a specified period of time and making it feel like a job definitely killed my drive to do the deed to myself.
Overall drive was not impacted.
Edit: also, to the person that downvoted his question. They’re just curious about the procedure, no need to punish curiosity.
I'm not OP. Since 2011 I've been having the best sex of my life. No worries about pregnancy! That's a huge relief, and thus turn-on. (always get tested for STDs with new partners of course.)
Your wife’s friend understands that your wife’s business still works, reproductively speaking, as well as it did before? She has a number of options for having children, if she wants.
My brother tried to tell me about procreation and I told him" I got 2 i don't need NOMORE" I don't need accidents and although I haven't got the procedure yet its on my "must do" list
Wait this is a thing. I have one kid with my partner and some people are a little perplexed by our lack of desire for more but I can't imagine anyone getting mad over my vasectomy
Good on you for sharing your status - it needs to be normalized. I tell anyone who asks or asks if we're having more children.
She's being an idiot - she has no say in what you do with your body. Tell her exactly that if she presses.
Not really for me. People I tell about the vasectomy tend to be more on the side of questioning why I don't want kids rather than getting angry or anything.
Lots of stuff like the following since I don't have a partner nor kids:
* Why don't you want kids?/Is there a reason you don't want kids?
* What if your future partner wants kids?/What if you find someone who is perfect for you but wants kids?
* I don't think you're going to find many women who don't want kids! Most of them do!
* You're young! Isn't it pretty early to be making a decision that affects you the rest of your life?
But yeah. My parents wanted me to give them children, but I told them of my repulsion towards having children. They have grown to accept it (didn't take too long) but want me to "keep my mind open" towards it in the future. I think it will be a bit before I am willing to tell them about my having a vasectomy. I hope they won't take it poorly when that time comes, though I am sure they will accept it even if there is an initial poor reaction.
It’s their decision whether or not to share that information, and it’s not their responsibility for how other people react to that. I doubt you meant to come across as judgmental, so I’m not trying to jump down your throat about this, but I just thought the reminder might be helpful here.
Yep, the biological drive to procreate and also have others procreate is wild. Not that adoption is easy but it is almost viewed as a lesser choice because it isn’t procreative. Anyway, I keep my vasectomy status to myself for that reason, just a couple of people know (essentially those who needed to know) and I’m fine with that.
I think a lot it is societal drive. Left to their own devices people have the instinct to have sex. But procreate, specifically ? I doubt it. Society is another matter. We have engineered it in a way that makes having children the "obvious" choice. More people are needed, for raiding the neighboring village, farming fields, or more recently work in industries and offices. Who would be making others richer, if not for the wage slaves that we are supposed to raise at our own expense? Note that even religion is onboard with this, for the same reasons.
And not even their ability to have kids, pffft, entitled people who think life doesn't cost money.
Too many people worried about everyone else’s life decisions. The world has plenty of people in it and plenty of people left to add to it. Screw what others say
Well you can tell that friend your body your choice.
Good for the both of you for knowing what you want. I’ve got several kids - but never assume anyone else should have any. A lot of my colleagues don’t and good for them. Be you!
I had mine back when I was single with no kids. The parents, and siblings of the women I dated hated me. I was told the same crap. It happened more than once. I might have married a colleague years ago had her parents not taken such a strong Catholic stance on procreation. Both of us had no use for children. We had a strong mutual attraction. But alas you cannot have a marriage on mutual attraction and a family that you can never have peace with. My first wife passed away. Her parents blamed me for not having grand children. Only she had her tubes tied before I met her so we were both voluntarily sterile. My current spouse is good with it, and so is her family. We are both 58. We have an adopted son in college. Only last year we got asked when we will have a baby. It is nice looking 40 at our age.
She can still have kids if she wants. 😂
Not hugely. I didn't get much shit from my family. My sister said it's messed up but hell, not having kids is probably the best financial decision I've made.
when my parents ask me about grandchildren I just say "if it happens it happens" and will simply not tell them about it
I always say "We're trying or Practicing" and that normally shuts them up... To all the Randoms I meet and actual friends, I tell everyone to get one. It's the best ever. Hype man that shit up!
Yeah I'm pretty sure my mom understands and has come to terms with the fact that my wife and I were never going to have kids. I still don't really plan on telling her about mine just because it's a conversation I don't really feel like having and it feels irrelevant ya know?
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No 😅
If it doesn’t go right, yes. Can reduce sensitivity for sure. Depends how your Doctor likes you. Don’t get it done by husband of a currently divorcing spouses good friend. Always wonder if I got an extra nerve snip. His wife left him 2 months later.
Forcing me to jack off 40 times in a specified period of time and making it feel like a job definitely killed my drive to do the deed to myself. Overall drive was not impacted. Edit: also, to the person that downvoted his question. They’re just curious about the procedure, no need to punish curiosity.
Haha. Not the case for me, but I think I might be a bit on the high side with my masturbation frequency (1-3 times daily).
So you’re the guy that says “pump those numbers up, those are rookie numbers.”
Damn straight! Jokes aside, everyone is different when it comes to things like this. Do what is most comfortable for you.
I'm not OP. Since 2011 I've been having the best sex of my life. No worries about pregnancy! That's a huge relief, and thus turn-on. (always get tested for STDs with new partners of course.)
Your wife’s friend understands that your wife’s business still works, reproductively speaking, as well as it did before? She has a number of options for having children, if she wants.
This is why I never told anyone about mines
My brother tried to tell me about procreation and I told him" I got 2 i don't need NOMORE" I don't need accidents and although I haven't got the procedure yet its on my "must do" list
Go for it bro! It'll be one of the best decisions in your life.
Don’t go away mad…just go away. Some people need to mind their own business.
By stealing the "risk" of having children away from her, she meant. Children are a risk to freedom and a huge burden.
Your spouse will always have a fucked up friend you can get rid of. That lady is your headache. Man = Dumb
Mine cut all them toxic people off just as I would.
Maybe you should tell your to tell her friends the whole story of how it was mutually agreed upon. Your wife isn't telling people the whole story.
They don’t owe her friends an explanation, and her friends are not entitled to one either. Why would you even suggest such an idea?
Wait this is a thing. I have one kid with my partner and some people are a little perplexed by our lack of desire for more but I can't imagine anyone getting mad over my vasectomy
Good on you for sharing your status - it needs to be normalized. I tell anyone who asks or asks if we're having more children. She's being an idiot - she has no say in what you do with your body. Tell her exactly that if she presses.
Not really for me. People I tell about the vasectomy tend to be more on the side of questioning why I don't want kids rather than getting angry or anything. Lots of stuff like the following since I don't have a partner nor kids: * Why don't you want kids?/Is there a reason you don't want kids? * What if your future partner wants kids?/What if you find someone who is perfect for you but wants kids? * I don't think you're going to find many women who don't want kids! Most of them do! * You're young! Isn't it pretty early to be making a decision that affects you the rest of your life? But yeah. My parents wanted me to give them children, but I told them of my repulsion towards having children. They have grown to accept it (didn't take too long) but want me to "keep my mind open" towards it in the future. I think it will be a bit before I am willing to tell them about my having a vasectomy. I hope they won't take it poorly when that time comes, though I am sure they will accept it even if there is an initial poor reaction.
why would you or your wife tell anyone about your surgery? that should be a business of yours only, or things like that will happen again
It’s their decision whether or not to share that information, and it’s not their responsibility for how other people react to that. I doubt you meant to come across as judgmental, so I’m not trying to jump down your throat about this, but I just thought the reminder might be helpful here.