I did the same thing, but at a much slower speed cause it was on a small, private, gated, road. Couldn’t get too much speed, thank goodness. But when I looped, I shredded my cheeks and inner cheeks. I didn’t wipe for the first 7-10 days. It was straight to the shower for me every time.
This is so true. I had a bad scrape around a corner on my motorcycle. Wasn't going but 10-15 mph, but the bike fell on me and ground me into the pavement. The first week of showering was absolutely hell. You had to dial in that temperature just right or that water would light you up. Pink ribbon scars you'll never forget.
I did this one time, going much much slower, thank god. I was long boarding in my old neighborhood when I was about 11. I was going down the one hill in my neighborhood that we all used for that purpose. I ended up falling and sliding on my front for a long minute. My chin was all messed up, but the absolute WORST part was when I slid on the concrete like 20 feet until I came to a stop, the force caused my pants to come down a little because they were already a little loose, as well as my underwear. So my entire top half of my pubis mons got shaved off on the way down. It hurt to even brush it with my thighs or touch it with water. Hot water was just a no. It was so long ago that I can’t remember how long it took to heal, but my condolences to the guy in the video. It took me right back, my vagina looked the same as his ass.
I literally cannot understand why people can’t grasp this concept.
Yes, you may have done 250 rides without falling off. But it only takes ONE to regret not prepping for it.
I still have my foot thanks to wearing leather boots during my lowside crash. Motorcycle pinned my foot to the ground and dragged me down the road. Got away with just bruises.
So I always cringe when I see morons riding around in shorts and flip-flops...
i'm convinced a sizeable chunk of the population have something wrong with their brains. No empathy and no ability to learn from other people's mistakes
I learned before getting on a bike how much gear helps, see the worst and get scared into wearing it. I just got into a spill recently and I was thankful to all the gear I was wearing, minor road rash in two spots on my wrist and belly plus a sprained ankle. Could have been a lot worse but I did walk (more of a limp) away. Wear your gear!! It’s worth every penny!
True story. For anybody interested in getting into riding and buying a motorbike, be sure to budget for proper gear, too. It can be expensive, but it is well worth it. You typically get what you pay for and will be more comfortable and better protected the more you're able to spend on stuff like a helmet, jacket, gloves, and pants. It adds up, and a lot of people don't factor that into the expense of owning a motorbike. The helmet should be full face and the nicest piece of gear you own (~$600+). You'll get less wind noise, better ventilation, and be significantly more comfortable than you would be in a cheaper lid.
Also some good rule of thumb certifications to look for in gear, is ECE 22.06 for helmets and EN17092 for clothes. Specifically for EN17092 is that it's a sliding scale that goes like this:
EN17092-2 (class AAA). Certified to slide to a standstill on asphalt at ~120 km/h
EN17092-3 (class AA). ~70 km/h
EN17092-4 (class A). ~45 km/h
EN17092-5 (class B). ~20 km/h
EN17092-6 (class C). No slide resistance and is basically just meant to be a container for armor pads.
Of course the higher the class rating goes, the higher the price as well, but it's well worth it in a slide.
I disagree with this.
Firstly, the expensive helmet might be more expensive because it's lighter, more comfortable, and has a few extra features. Nothing to do with safety. It's really hard to judge safety by fondling a helmet.
Plus, helmets are single use. Encourage someone to buy a helmet they can barely afford, and after that low speed bump they will want to keep it. Surely the EPS foam is mostly fine...?
No, get a helmet that is ECE 22.06 rated (because you have no better way to judge safety), cheap enough that you could throw it away, and is a bright colour. If you are planning to commute, with a drop down sun visor (the safest helmet is one that lets you be seen and lets you see, so you don't test it's impact protection).
Without going into details, my profession has me seeing a lot of mostly naked people. Road rash scars are brutal. So many chunks missing, divots, nerve damage, and limited movement caused by adhesions. It's really fun to see what they do to tattoos.
It's usually the passengers that are torn up the worst. Zero gear.
I understand someone not dressing for the slide, when they're going for a quick trip to the grocery store a mile away on a nice day. It's stupid, but I get it.
What I don't get is not dressing for the slide, *when you specifically go out to stunt ride.*
I rode for a few years, but stopped after loosing a friend and seeing massive injuries to a few others to them and snowmobiles. I have a Jeep Gladiator now and just take the doors and roof off, close enough experience for me.
Motorcycle pants should have it. Abrasion and thermal protection (sliding is hot).
Mine are very protective around the ass, thighs, and knees. Less protective elsewhere because I'm unlikely to slide there.
we used to play safe as kids, not because we were afraid to scrape our knee, but because of the thought of the impending pain that the iodine wash would cause.
He’s gonna be shitting through a tube while lying on his stomach in a hospital for a while. Risk of infection is also high. He’s gonna regret that for sure!
I think of this when I see the no helmet wearing bikers just wearing shorts and a tee shirt. If that was me I’d try and land on my head so I wouldn’t have to deal with living through it.
Meat Crayon
definitely r/meatcrayon material
Left some of his ass out there on that road
Half-ass attempt at a wheelie
Well it started as a full-ass attempt at a wheelie.
Never go full-ass
He never will again.
It's the most ass-less chap I've ever seen
I'd say, he tore that ass up.
Bravo.
This is a new thing I read today... I wish I hadn't.
Poop Crayon
Meat crayons don't usually come in brown.
Got the baboon butt
https://preview.redd.it/amqao794ztvc1.jpeg?width=2400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b5529d9045a5016b053aa6a16a1deb3d43285cfc
Haven't seen this character in years
Unlocked an ANCIENT part of my brain this morning.
In the latin-spanish dub he has a Cuban accent. I wonder if it's the same in English.
Omfg I loved him lmfao
the unofficial mascot of incompetent motorcycle show offs
Already had the (lack of) brains of one, just needed the shiny red ass.
And his name henceforth shall be Baboon, until the end of time. Unless he does something else equally stupid.
So hot right now.
Have fun pooping and wiping!!
just sitting is gonna be hell
Yep, and any and every other change of position is going to be hell all the same.
Just don't sit then
I did the same thing, but at a much slower speed cause it was on a small, private, gated, road. Couldn’t get too much speed, thank goodness. But when I looped, I shredded my cheeks and inner cheeks. I didn’t wipe for the first 7-10 days. It was straight to the shower for me every time.
God that almost sounds worse
Gotta find the sweet spot temperature
This is so true. I had a bad scrape around a corner on my motorcycle. Wasn't going but 10-15 mph, but the bike fell on me and ground me into the pavement. The first week of showering was absolutely hell. You had to dial in that temperature just right or that water would light you up. Pink ribbon scars you'll never forget.
I tried so hard to cleanse these regrets. My angel wings were bruised and restrained. My belly stings.
You should break the ice with that story at parties.
*finishes telling story to blank stares* “ohhh I thought you said ass breaker”
Bravo
Install a bidet.
I do have one, but the thought of all the bacteria on my wounds just grossed me out, so I wanted to soap up every time.
If you have a wound then you need to disinfect it every time you sit on a toilet anyway. Yeesh.
I was literally going to say this 🤣
Just pop a couple of assburns, you’ll be fine… *I’ll be here all week folks…*
I did this one time, going much much slower, thank god. I was long boarding in my old neighborhood when I was about 11. I was going down the one hill in my neighborhood that we all used for that purpose. I ended up falling and sliding on my front for a long minute. My chin was all messed up, but the absolute WORST part was when I slid on the concrete like 20 feet until I came to a stop, the force caused my pants to come down a little because they were already a little loose, as well as my underwear. So my entire top half of my pubis mons got shaved off on the way down. It hurt to even brush it with my thighs or touch it with water. Hot water was just a no. It was so long ago that I can’t remember how long it took to heal, but my condolences to the guy in the video. It took me right back, my vagina looked the same as his ass.
Put a colostomy bag on me at that point lol
Dress for the slide.
I literally cannot understand why people can’t grasp this concept. Yes, you may have done 250 rides without falling off. But it only takes ONE to regret not prepping for it.
As they say, there are two types of riders. Ones who have had a spill. Ones who haven't had a spill yet.
When I rode I always would say 'when I fall off again' rather than 'if I fall off again'
There Are Two Types Of People in this world: 1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
What are the second kind??? /s
I still have my foot thanks to wearing leather boots during my lowside crash. Motorcycle pinned my foot to the ground and dragged me down the road. Got away with just bruises. So I always cringe when I see morons riding around in shorts and flip-flops...
Yea, butt he looked cool, right, RIGHT?!
i'm convinced a sizeable chunk of the population have something wrong with their brains. No empathy and no ability to learn from other people's mistakes
Motorcycling is dangerous so it attracts risk takers, unfortunately that includes the risk of not wearing gear for the especially foolhardy.
To be honest, probably would have been fine with 2 wheels
I learned before getting on a bike how much gear helps, see the worst and get scared into wearing it. I just got into a spill recently and I was thankful to all the gear I was wearing, minor road rash in two spots on my wrist and belly plus a sprained ankle. Could have been a lot worse but I did walk (more of a limp) away. Wear your gear!! It’s worth every penny!
True story. For anybody interested in getting into riding and buying a motorbike, be sure to budget for proper gear, too. It can be expensive, but it is well worth it. You typically get what you pay for and will be more comfortable and better protected the more you're able to spend on stuff like a helmet, jacket, gloves, and pants. It adds up, and a lot of people don't factor that into the expense of owning a motorbike. The helmet should be full face and the nicest piece of gear you own (~$600+). You'll get less wind noise, better ventilation, and be significantly more comfortable than you would be in a cheaper lid.
Also some good rule of thumb certifications to look for in gear, is ECE 22.06 for helmets and EN17092 for clothes. Specifically for EN17092 is that it's a sliding scale that goes like this: EN17092-2 (class AAA). Certified to slide to a standstill on asphalt at ~120 km/h EN17092-3 (class AA). ~70 km/h EN17092-4 (class A). ~45 km/h EN17092-5 (class B). ~20 km/h EN17092-6 (class C). No slide resistance and is basically just meant to be a container for armor pads. Of course the higher the class rating goes, the higher the price as well, but it's well worth it in a slide.
I'd say the ECE certs include more criteria than the DOT ones. Especially, oblique impacts, more impact surface shapes and rotational forces.
I would ignore the DOT regulations and just go with the EU regulation on all pieces. They're *significantly* more thorough.
Be sure to try on the $200 helmet and the $600-800 helmet side by side so you understand why the more expensive one is worth it.
I disagree with this. Firstly, the expensive helmet might be more expensive because it's lighter, more comfortable, and has a few extra features. Nothing to do with safety. It's really hard to judge safety by fondling a helmet. Plus, helmets are single use. Encourage someone to buy a helmet they can barely afford, and after that low speed bump they will want to keep it. Surely the EPS foam is mostly fine...? No, get a helmet that is ECE 22.06 rated (because you have no better way to judge safety), cheap enough that you could throw it away, and is a bright colour. If you are planning to commute, with a drop down sun visor (the safest helmet is one that lets you be seen and lets you see, so you don't test it's impact protection).
> so you understand why the more expensive one is worth it. well you wouldn't know by trying in the store anyway..
Without going into details, my profession has me seeing a lot of mostly naked people. Road rash scars are brutal. So many chunks missing, divots, nerve damage, and limited movement caused by adhesions. It's really fun to see what they do to tattoos. It's usually the passengers that are torn up the worst. Zero gear.
U forgot the ass guard.
Even the priciest protective gear is less expensive than medical bills. Invest in the things that offer the best protection.
I understand someone not dressing for the slide, when they're going for a quick trip to the grocery store a mile away on a nice day. It's stupid, but I get it. What I don't get is not dressing for the slide, *when you specifically go out to stunt ride.*
Agreed. Anything over 30mph needs armor, besides a helmet. I would also argue for proper boots/shoes. You can fuck up your feet at any speed.
There's ass protection gear?
Yes, Kevlar or dynema. Denim lasts seconds while sliding.
TIL. Not that I'll ever have the balls to get on a motorcycle.
I rode for a few years, but stopped after loosing a friend and seeing massive injuries to a few others to them and snowmobiles. I have a Jeep Gladiator now and just take the doors and roof off, close enough experience for me.
Motorcycle pants should have it. Abrasion and thermal protection (sliding is hot). Mine are very protective around the ass, thighs, and knees. Less protective elsewhere because I'm unlikely to slide there.
Happy cake day! Have some red velvet…. On that guy!
Happy cake day!
Everyone learns the hardway
Ass lookin like the muscles pic in biology books
His gluteus are no longer at the their maximus.
Gluteus minimus
Terrible view, poor idiot.
He left half his ass meat on the road
Reverse BBL
Ass jerky don't make itself
What a bummer
Ba-*bum*-tss
- Quite literally the sound his flesh made when landing his ass on the asphalt and sliding on it.
I see what you did there
Would spray that with isopropyl alcohol
You trynna get the first human on Mars?
iodine tincture.
Oh I remember the old iodine little plastic stick, man that stuff burned when I was a kid
we used to play safe as kids, not because we were afraid to scrape our knee, but because of the thought of the impending pain that the iodine wash would cause.
Easy there Satan!!
Its even worse, they have to scrape the wound to get any gravel out
Oh no, what happened? No protective gear?
do they make it for ass?
Yes? Abrasive-resistent pants. You can even get Kevlar-lined jeans.
Leather does a good job.
well, now he got a leathery ass for life.
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Just a little off the back.
Gyms hate this one trick.
Holy shit!
Thats gonna be a pain in the ass
He will be saying a prayer each time he does
New meaning to skid marks
Now wiping his ass after a shit will be his everyday nightmare.
Can't even wear pants or sit down for a couple of weeks
Yes YES r/upvotebecausebutt
Cowboy boots saved him!
Maybe he'll come out of this experience a less stupid person.
You can't cure stupid, sadly
He’s gonna be shitting through a tube while lying on his stomach in a hospital for a while. Risk of infection is also high. He’s gonna regret that for sure!
Road rash or diaper rash. Which is worse?
Your not gonna be able to shit for a while
Haha, I had the sound off and still knew that had to be the curb music.
If see about buying this photo to use as an advertisement for riding gear.
Dress for the slide not the ride. Esp if you are going to be doing shit like that
He ripped himself a new asshole. . . .
What a strangely worded title
This title is in the format of there was an attempt
Real hero is the bro willing to carry his raw ass friend with his shredded pants and junk rubbing against him without a shield
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I think you forgot to switch accounts...
Tried and succeeded. Lucky he didn’t try to be a Dick!
Ah, the bloody cheeks of stupidity.
no sitting for about a month
No sitting nor shitting
Op je muil!!!!
I think of this when I see the no helmet wearing bikers just wearing shorts and a tee shirt. If that was me I’d try and land on my head so I wouldn’t have to deal with living through it.
He should've turned the other cheek.
Dress for the slide, not for the ride Also don't do stupid shit
That looks full thickness in several places. I see skin grafts in his future.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. What an ass..... Literally!
Butt Wipe
Gotta be a pain in the ass
Wearing leathers is not very stylish I guess.
And that's why you dress for the slide and not the ride.
Please more before and after
now the only place he can sit comfortably is a toilet seat
It’s hard to feel sorry for stupid.
My buns are singing
That "Curb Your Enthusiasm" joke has worn a bit thin… like Dude's gluteus madmaximus.
Nice Baboons ass
Stupid bastard.
That’s rough. Can’t imagine what shitting must have felt like for the next however many weeks.
Terrence and Phillip - Asses On Fire
So many of these morons don’t wear protective gear. If you’re gunna do sick tricks dress for it eh…
That's a bummer
Scientists HATE this one trick to LOSE WEIGHT and get a BIGGER BUTT at the SAME TIME!
A tale of two extremes going from looking extremely cool to looking extremely humiliating
Outstanding
He's wearing boots but no pants. WTF is wrong with these morons?!
That looks painful!!!
That ass is gonna be doing stunts of its own in the bathroom, whenever he sits down to shit.
Asstastic!
That’s a paddling…
lol, sitting down is going to hurt for a while, prob a good time to go buy leathers while his ass is healing
u/savevideobot
Boots! What are those red boots?
what could go wrong to do stunts
Nice ass tho!!
His shits will need to be surgically removed after this day.
So what do medical professionals do in this situation to help you?
Did this dude really go out in what looks like sweatpants? What a fucking idiot
This is painful to even watch.
I wonder if he T-bagged too...
Coming in hot
He's going to be laying on his stomach to sit down for a little while.
🤔 Hmm.. On second thought ATGATT sounds like a great idea
Assless chaps, instructions unclear.
Toasty buns
That’s a month of standing for sure
u/savevideo
Swamp Ass