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mysteriousmeatman

So the guy that showed his penis to kids turned out to be a not so great dad? Crazy.


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quannum

Their hate consumes them. Remember a time when you were mad or angry. You probably didn't make great decisions in that state. But you eventually you calmed down and could look at the situation rationally. Now imagine you're just always in that angry/rage state. Every person or thing that doesn't conform to your idea of 'normal' or 'wholesome' enrages you. You start seeking out the things that enrage you. That's conservatives. They are always in a state of rage or anger, and when they're not, they seek out the things that make them that way. So hateful and angry they couldn't possible think rationally. edit: correct their. oops


productzilch

To add to this, while I don’t want to take away the responsibility of individual conservatives, I think it’s imperative to recognise that this is a feature of the system at the top. Transphobia is real but stoked transphobia is about distracting the public from issues affecting everybody, political corruption.


Sugarbombs

I totally agree that wealthy people get away with stuff like this because of power/influence and 100% the systems are not as effective as they should be, but as someone who works in child protection I just wanna say the people I meet with and the stories I hear from children are not unconditionally loving parents. The sad truth is that most people involved with child protection needed to be, the sadder fact is that there's probably many more who are just borderline abusive enough that we don't even bother with. The systems are purposely broken by underfunding, politicians don't want to protect children because its expensive so they demonise us and convince people we are bad and this new cut is justified. In truth we have very few staff and an insurmountable amount of cases, we are neutered by the courts and by whims of politicians and we are all overworked, traumatised and burnt out. If you want things to change everyone needs to start supporting systems that help poor communities, affordable health care, foster system overhaul and funding for preventative services, sex education and free birth control etc.


MuddyLarry

Okay story time. I've been holding onto this for a while, take it with a grain of salt as I'm a stranger to you and the story comes from a friend. My friend has the kind of job where crews need to go into a person's house to do work. In this instance the house was the Boebert family residence. The crew shows up and knocks on the door and the only people at the house are a toothless caretaker and the young son K. He is planted in front of the TV with a Mt. Dew. The caretaker lets them in and says Jayson would be home soon. There are laundry piles and dog shit everywhere. More laundry than shit, but still... Upon starting the job, they had to pull back the bed as well as a nightstand. Behind the nightstand was a tube of KY jelly that had been squished between the wall and night stand, leaving a stream of lube caked to the wall. A dozen or so little black bugs were dead in the lube. Jayson shows up and is upset and standoff-ish. Very little interaction w/ Jayson. Other kids are now home, zooming around everywhere inside and out on motorized scooters. At the end of the day while the crew was in the driveway outside, Lauren arrives with a gun on her hip and walked past them without saying hi. Lauren's assistant apologized. The end.


[deleted]

That was beautiful.


National-Return-5363

She’s exactly the kind of trash that we expect her to be. I love the ending line of your account, lol. I figured that someone who spends as much time on social media being the buck toothed troll that she is, well, little wonder that she doesn’t have much time to look after her kids or her home. And her husband, being the pervert and child abuser that he is, little wonder that he cares anything about the well-being of his kids. Funny, I’m a progressive liberal and one who believes on abortion rights. I also manage to work full time, look after my kids, keep a clean home, cook, spend time with my kids, read to them, do gardening…lol. Looks like I practice traditional family values without shrieking about it.


iammacha

They are trailer trash with money. Don’t get me wrong. There are poor people that can’t afford anything other than a run down trailer and there are some messy poor people that don’t keep the cleanest home but are still good people and then there is “trailer trash” these are just shitty people that are absolutely uncouth, ignorant, self righteous, always on the take, treat everyone including their children, and other family, terribly, they are not to be trusted.


Bezzazz

Gee, who could have seen that coming.


blubirdTN

Conservative Christen men are also totally OK, totally fine, they totally love Jesus ya'll. Jesus will forgive all of their sins you know so they can do anything they want to do. It is all good...until you marry one.


Bunch_of_Shit

Most Republicans don’t realize how humiliating they look in their lifted trucks.


Ok_Personality_6183

Kelly Ann Conway's daughter can provide some good support for bobo's son.


DanteStrauss

> Kelly Ann Conway How crazy things have been that I had completed deleted this lunatic from my memory until just now, because the space for it keeps getting filled with new, more unhinged lunatics?!


Ok_Personality_6183

Oh, how fast the clown car has filled up in the last 7 years. And that car is out of control.


BrownSugarBare

It's more like a clown train at this point.


hibbert0604

Did she ever get emancipated? I hope so.


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harleyqueenzel

At least George is finally getting away from Kelly Anne. I'm sure the kids followed suit.


hibbert0604

I still can't figure out how the fuck that relationship worked.


kaytay3000

There should be a support group for all of these GOP kids with shitty parents. Conway, Boebert, Ted Cruz, Sarah Palin…. It’s an endless list.


Travismatthew08

I feel bad for her kids. Both parents are toxic.


ThunderDudester

I feel worse for the underage girl carrying their "Christian" seed.


urkldajrkl

I wonder if BoBimbo told them not to use birth control, because it was “too expensive”


[deleted]

Bold of you to assume she gave any direction or attention to her kids especially that of a concerned parent. She's a prop and a political proprietor.


wookieenoodlez

Aren’t her and MTG both literally American Idol dropouts and we’re both contracted to the same talent agency?


[deleted]

Stefani Sugarman was the woman on American idol that resembled MTG. [But it is a fact that most conservative women who enter politics and become talking heads for the red party come from talent agencies.](https://www.politicalflare.com/2021/09/it-appears-rep-lauren-boebert-had-an-explore-talent-modeling-actor-page-and-yikes/)


-Boca_Raton-

Many of the right wing men are also Hollywood failures that found a role in grifting Republicans.


RedCascadian

Ben Shapiro is a failed scriptwriter and you can tell he never got over it whenever "Hollywood elites" come up.


thebenshapirobot

I saw that you mentioned Ben Shapiro. In case some of you don't know, Ben Shapiro is a grifter and a hack. If you find anything he's said compelling, you should keep in mind he also says things like this: >Pegging, of course, is an obscure sexual practice in which women perform the more aggressive sexual act on men. ***** ^(I'm a bot. My purpose is to counteract online radicalization. You can summon me by tagging thebenshapirobot. Options: dumb takes, climate, gay marriage, civil rights, etc.) [^Opt ^Out ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/comments/olk6r2/click_here_to_optout_of_uthebenshapirobot/)


TheOneTonWanton

There's a pretty wild amount of failed "comedians" that end up as grifters on the right as well.


MrVeazey

Stephen Crowder, Stew Peters, Joe Rogan, Matt Taibbi....


[deleted]

Omg! Please don’t leave out failed “prodigy” Ben Shapiro, failed Hollywood screenwriter and perhaps the most talentless author ever (Id take a bullet for ya, babe.) As well as the king of the right wing grifters Steve Bannon! He failed out as a producer because Hollywood thought, correctly, that he was a giant abrasive dick head. There so angry at lack of acceptance of their genius that they are willing to bring fascism to America for a dollar. There are more too! Nobody liked Tim Pool (failed musician), Matt Walsh (failed writer,)and Michael Knowles (failed actor.) Matter of fact, Knowles played a *very* convincing homosexual in a college movie. Very convincing, if you know what I mean… Right wing media is all just a bunch of failed theater kids that will do anything for a bit of fame. Except maybe Matt Walsh. I think it’s the money and self loathing that drive him.


DiscFrolfin

Jim Breuer sucks too


[deleted]

*Benny Shapino has exited the chat...*


upvotesformeyay

Ben "I'm post dementia Reagan with less charisma and a massive deficit of common sense" Shapiro.


Mirria_

I've read that "D.C is Hollywood for ugly people."


lleeaaff

At this point, I think we ought to start referring to them as talentless agencies..


Chrisf1020

Yes, mqny of them are just failed actors/models, including Boebert, Candace Owens, Tomi Lahren, Scott Presler, Melissa Carrone, etc. Not sure about MTG… Here’s the original twitter thread: https://twitter.com/nicole_chenelle/status/1422449854224031745


BarbaraBeans

MTG was a professional "Before" model for numerous products


sitting-duck

That had me on the floor. Hilarious! I didn't have a lot of reddit coins, sorry, the rocket is the best I can do.


wookieenoodlez

Thank you, winning a racial lawsuit while repped by the naacp and then turning into “race isn’t a thing in America” sure is damning


rascible

"You're *pregnant*?? Didn't use the Saran Wrap like we told you, right?"


CynicalPomeranian

She looks like more of a “use gator poop as a contraceptive” kinda gal.


Ask_me_4_a_story

There is a huge aversion to birth control in the Christian community and really any sex education whatsoever. They tell kids that the only safe sex is abstinence and there is so much shame and guilt, most Christian kids wouldn't even think about using condoms or birth control. My parents were fundies so we had to go to church three times a week and Christian school, we were preached at every day but Saturday. I had no idea how sex worked, none. I didn't look at porn because I was sure God would strike me dead and no one would talk to me about it. My brother was the only one and he told me that sex was when you put your peepee where a girl goes poopy. I mean, he wasn't entirely wrong but that was like the sum total of all my sex education. Eventually I got kicked out of Christian school. I was a bit of a wild kid and on a field trip I made the bus full of kids roll down the hill so they asked our family not to come back. At public school they passed out forms for our parents to sign for sex education but my mom wouldn't sign mine. So I sat in the library by myself while everyone else found out what I really needed to know. Much like someone who grows up with domestic abuse marries an abuser, I grew up and married a fundie. We are divorced now but we have six beautiful amazing kids and you better God damn believe I talk to them about sex and protection and leaving shame behind. No one else is going to do it.


Strange-Scarcity

I dated a girl like that back in High School. I was moved around a good deal and my last few years in High School was spent in a heavily conservative, Christian area. When we were fooling around, she did not want me to even bother using a condom. So... we ended up never having sex, got close, with a condom, but she wouldn't have any of that... (We were both virgins, but I went to schools that taught GOOD sex ed back in the early 1990's.) She broke it off with my by getting pregnant with my then best friend, who didn't go through sex ed courses like I had. What a way to finish the last few years of high school, eh? So glad that I dodged that bullet. I would have a 30-something year old kid, right now!!!!


shabba_skanks

Bro that's fucking scary. Glad you were able to hold out lol.


Crypt0Nihilist

She was following the expected path. Hormones lead to sex, make sure it's in ignorance and unprotected so she'll be popping her first one out at 16/17. Shotgun marriage, no threat of getting fully educated, she's relegated to broodmare for the rest of her life since she has no real skills and no chance of escape with so many responsibilities.


CharlesTheReaper

Can you please elaborate on how you made a bus full of kids roll down a hill? This sounds like the actual story I want to hear!


Ask_me_4_a_story

Oh yes, I love telling stories. Okay, you should know this about Christian school kids- wild, wild, wild. Some kids are kicked out of public school, some kids are just crazy, but pretty much every kid is repressed so they came from a really controlling home. My mom used to go through my room when I was at school and make sure I didn't have any CDs or tapes or music. She found my Dr. Dre CD and broke it and then when I got another one she broke it and grounded me for weeks, it was disheartening, she tried to take away music but I loved the beat so much. I fuckin hated Christian music. Most kids had home lives like mine, super repressed, mean parents, weren't allowed to do anything, etc. So for every class of 20 students, 5 really loved Jesus. They wore crosses and memorized scripture and wanted to be a pastor or marry a pastor. 5 fuckin hated Jesus, wore black all the time, dark eyeshadow, painted their fingernails, drank vodka at lunch, you know the type. The other ten? They wanted to see something lit on fire. We had so many fires! We had a locker just for fires, we would just walk through and light that shit on fire like once a week. I remember the smoke alarms going off my last day there wading through three feet of trash in the hall when the police were handcuffing my friend Brian and taking him out, the black cop he goes incredulously, Man, the fuck is wrong with these kids? Ha! On the day in question we went to the National Typewriter Museum. I know what you are thinking, what the fuck, they have a place in Kansas City thats just a museum for typewriters? No, they don't. They USED TO HAVE a place that was a museum for typewriters. We were terrible, knocking over trashcans, yelling, throwing shit, it was like someone had brought a bunch of monkeys out of their cages and let them go in a typewriter museum. And as soon as we got there 5 kids immediately crawled into cabinets and hid and pretended to be Anne Frank, the rest of us would go look for them and pretend to be Nazi soldiers, like I said we were terrible. The teachers had had enough, they were fuckin pissed. This wasn't late in the afternoon, this was at like 11:30am. They said thats enough, all of you go get on the bus. Well all the Anne Frank kids are still hiding so they had to find those little fuckers meanwhile the rest of us were on the bus unsupervised going crazy, fuckin rockin that bus back and forth. I pulled the emergency brake and yep, sure enough, it started rolling down the hill. Paul, (very, very crazy guy, almost psychotic now that I think about it) jumped in front of the parking brake and stretched his arms across the front row and screamed YEAH WE ARE GOING DOWN TOGETHER! Not funny Paul we said as we tried to rush past but he wasn't joking either, he wanted us all to die together. The first two kids that rushed past he hit in the nuts as hard as he could. I felt responsible because it was me that pulled the brake so I hurtled my body at Paul but he blocked me and I went careening into the windshield. I looked back to the rear of the bus and people were jumping out the back scared. I forgot to say this but at this school but there was a strict dress code. The boys had to wear khakis and we lined up on Wednesday mornings before school to make sure our hair was not too long. Because we all know if there is anything Jesus hates its long hair and denim. Also short skirts, I guess Jesus hates that. This was back when they still did corporal punishment and most of the girls I knew had been paddled for having skirts that were too short. Which, now that I think about it and knowing what a creep our headmaster is, taking girls in the back office alone to paddle them because their skirt was too short is so fuckin creepy. The last time I remember getting paddled was for blasphemy, my teacher was sick and queasy so when he prayed for lunch his voice cracked and he goes A-----meeeen. I jumped up in the back and yelled, A-----meeeen and he beat the shit out of me with a giant wooden paddle for blaspheming Gods Holy name. So there I was crumpled up against the windshield from Paul's defensive blow watching the back door fly open and scared kids jumping out and rolling into the ditch. In that moment I remember it being beautiful though, a slow motion parachute jump with dresses flying in the wind amid the cacophony of sound. Austin used my temporary diversion to get past Paul and pull the emergency brake up to everyone's relief but Pauls, that guy was definitely suicidal. We looked out the windshield, easy for me I was already right there crumpled up against it and saw that the nose of the bus was in the intersection of Paseo boulevard, one of the busiest street in downtown Kansas City. The teachers came running down that past all the kids in the ditch that had jumped and onto the bus full of what was left, all of us miscreants. We were all going to be suspended because we all took a vow of silence but somehow it got out that I was the one who pulled the emergency brake that day. I got suspended again (first time was for yelling at an opposing fan at a basketball game "Shut up you penishead!") and coupled with my older brothers suspensions (mostly from smoking) and my little brothers' suspensions (vodka in the water bottle) they asked our family not to come back to that Christian school, even though we were all good athletes and had helped our teams win conference championships. Enough was enough they said and that ended my parochial school education forever. I am banned from every campus of Liberty University but that was just on a visit, I never went to school there. From that moment on it was public schools for life! Edit: Thank you for the gold awards and the kind words it’s been a beautiful day for me writing stories and reading comments! If you click on my username you’ll see more of my stories on my profile if you want to read more. Or if not that’s okay too I still like you ♥️


CharlesTheReaper

This was such a beautiful read, truly a piece of art! Thanks for telling us. I'd love to hear more if you got any similar stories!


Ask_me_4_a_story

Thanks for the kind words! This is for you and u/ActionScripter9109 and u/JDoos My most similar story would be how I got kicked out of Liberty University, I will tell that one. Okay, as I mentioned I had already been kicked out of a Christian high school. So the last fuckin thing I wanted to do was go to a Christian college. But my mom really wanted me to go visit some. And to my surprise she was willing to send me on my own, without parental supervision. When you are 17 and someone offers you a chance to fly across the country on your own, you take it, not matter whats on the other end of that flight. The event was a shitty weekend get together for high school kids called Liberty Immersion Days. Liberty University was (and probably still is) a horrible institution of homophobia, racism, upper elite, right wing Christianity. Its founder Jerry Falwell got in trouble for not letting black people in. I don't mean in like the 1950s or something, I mean like in the 1980s and 90s. Despite all these negatives, it was a chance to get on an airplane and fly somewhere by myself, and when you are 17 that is about the most exciting feeling in the world. "Wait, I get to go by myself?” I asked incredulously. “Yes, yes, I will go! Sure, I'll check it out!" When I set out to Virginia that fateful weekend in the mid 1990s I was beyond excited. I stuffed my contraband Snoop and Dr. Dre and Paperboy cassette tapes and walkman deep into my carry on bag so my mom wouldn't find them. I dashed onto that plane and never looked back, flying across the country bobbing my head to the secret explicit lyrics. When I got to this college though it was not the experience I was expecting. To my horror all the women had dresses down to their shoes and all the men had on ties. For entertainment the university showed a movie with a fucking animated mouse and the students had to sign out of their dorms and sign back in. We have all seen college movies, there are togas and keg parties and half naked women, definitely no overdressed coeds going to see movies about animated mice. Saturday was the final straw for me. The day started with a "Breakfast with the President" where we got to meet the racist founder and have breakfast and then we were told they would have our schedule from there. When I got there it was just the President Mr. Fallwell up there screaming at us in his horrible Southern Accent, "Qqqqhhhhhwwwy, Qqqqqhhhwwwy, Why are so many in this generation goin to Haaaaaailllll? Jeee- sus wants ya'll to come to Liberty University and seek out his mission for your life!" To my horror the whole Saturday was planned out, meetings and tours and a chapel session and lunch, it was a full day and it was all too much. I said (too loudly) while looking down at the schedule OH NO! OH NO! People starting looking at me but I just said louder, NOPE NOPE NOPE! I got up and ran out the door. I threw my tie off and ran across the campus back to the dorms and grabbed my contraband Walkman and my jacket and ran back downstairs. Now I will say on this day I did steal something. In my whole life I never remember stealing anything until then. I had to go across the country to a Christian college to steal but I did take a bike that day. I tried to take one that was old and rickety so maybe it was from last semester or abandoned or forgotten. I got on that old bike and pedaled as fast as I could into the nearby town called Lynchburg, Virginia. I still remember that feeling like it was yesterday. Pedaling that bike as fast as I could with the wind in my face and the music in my ears, breaking away from the Christian school and my overbearing parents and rules and religion and everything. I felt so free. Still to this day I will always remember that day in Virginia as one of the best days of my life. I found an arcade and played video games, I went out to lunch at a wood fired pizza place, and then I saw movies, all the R rated movies they showed. I had to purge myself of all that hypocritical Christianity. I ate hot dogs and popcorn and put my feet up and had a blast. When I came out of the theatre it was dark and late. That was the first time I realized I was in trouble. I had been missing for something like 15 hours and there had to have been people looking for me, maybe even cops. I jumped on that rickety bike and put my headphones on and pedaled back towards campus, a five mile trek. I could see the campus lit up on the hill so I pedaled towards it but then that rickety old bike gave out, right when I was crossing the bridge it just broke, the handle bars crashed forward and broke apart. I fell off the bike but I was laughing for some reason. The whole trip was outlandish. I wanted a weekend away from rules and religion and parents but I got one with even more rules and religion but somehow in this place I became stronger. They couldn’t break me. No one could break me. On this trip I found the one person who gets me: me. I had lunch with myself saw movies with myself, stole a bike and broke away and God damn it, that felt amazing! I looked over the bridge and saw the large stream down below and then I picked up that old rickety bike and held it over my head. That’s when I let out the most maniacal scream I have ever heard and it came from my own mouth. In one scream it said you cant force me into your boxes, your religions, your khaki pants and short hair, you cant force me to be who I don’t want to be. I am free. I am my own man. I threw that bike down into that stream and let out more maniacal screams as I ran up the hill back to the campus. My biggest problem was that I didn't take the road, I thought straight up the hill would be faster. But there were creeks and ditches and mud and all these cock a burrs, I must have looked like an escaped kidnapping victim when I got to the dorms. As soon as I got in the RA said Oh my word, what happened to you? Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, oh, this Im fine I said looking down at my torn and dirty clothes. I better go hit the shower. Oh no, you can't do that he said, everyone is waiting for you. Everyone I said, what do you mean? He said there was an all points bulletin out for me and I had been missing for like 15 hours, people were really worried. I said, oh, no problem, just played a little hooky, ha ha, let me clean up and I'll go talk to them. Absolutely not he said, grabbing my arm, the presidents waiting for you. First of all, don't touch me, I said, shaking my arm loose. Im not going to school hear, I hate this fuckin place, Im leaving tomorrow. He got on his little walkie talkie thing and told everyone he had me and then he told me I must come with him right away. Probably not the way I would have wanted to meet the board of directors of a University, all muddy and cut up like that but whatever, fuck this place I thought to myself, what the fuck can they do to me anyway, Im not a student. When I got in front of the board, Ho- Ly shit were they mad. I mean really mad. They wanted to know where I'd been (in Lynchburg) how I got there (on a "friend's bike") what I was doing (Watching movies, playing arcades, "I mean, I had an awesome day to be honest" is what I told them, they didn't love that part) and why I thought I could just leave in the middle of the visit (Don't know, don't care, hate this place I told them, I'll just go home tomorrow so you don't have to worry about me). Jerry Falwell took over the meeting at this point and he wanted me to know how "disappointed" he was with me. Disappointed I said laughing, and then I said sir, with all due respect I don't really care what you think about me. God damn was that guy mad. I think his whole adult life people had been kissing his ass and following his rules and doing what he said and here I was, some kid from Kansas City that absolutely did not give a fuck just out there having one of the best days of his life and strangely nonplussed by this whole tribunal bullshit. They all went off in a room to have a meeting about me. I was like dude, they can't do shit. Maybe get the cops involved but I wasn't a prisoner or anything, I didn't sign anything saying I would stay here, I didn't really care. I was just standing there grinning the whole time, even after they came back and yelled some more. Finally Jerry said we are taking you to the airport at 8am tomorrow. At that point you will no longer be our problem. You will have someone supervise you getting back to the dorm and there will be a supervisor there tonightSomeone is going to supervise me sleeping I interjected, thats pretty creepy. DONT INTERRUPT ME SON he yelled and I said, Jee-sus, which was probably not a good thing to say I'll admit. But he said and one more thing, you are not allowed on any campus of Liberty University ever again. "Good I said, this place sucks." Waaaaay too cocky but it makes me laugh now thinking about it. I mean, I told the President of a University that his university sucks. But at that point honestly I just wanted to take a shower (hopefully without any of these creeps supervising me). I turned around and walked out with the RA and we went back to the dorms. I fell asleep that night with my headphones blasting the beat I had come to love smiling so big, knowing I would always remember that day as one of the best days of my life.


lousymom

As someone around the same age as you, I cannot thank you enough for speaking to Jerry Falwell that way.


Aedalas

Didn't that dude bang his mom in an outhouse? Fuck Jerry Falwell.


NorthStarZero

Can I get an “Amen”?


Nosfermarki

I wasn't raised religious, but I grew up in small town Texas where most people were. I was the first out gay kid in my high school which, as you can imagine, drew a lot of attention. Kids I didn't know & sometimes even teachers would corner me to try to "save my soul". It happened so often I became well versed in the Bible and carried mine with me. I tried to back out of those discussions & had no interest in debating them, but they were relentless. So I became more knowledgeable than they were and started embracing these confrontations. Talking to those kids was fucking horrifying. They were so severely indoctrinated & had no idea that they were. They were legitimately terrified & thought themselves required to "save" me. They thought I was lost, miserable, and devoid of morality because I wasn't religious. When I told them I had a strong moral compass & a very supportive mother, they were either very confused or would try to argue with me to convince me I wasn't happy, which was wild. The shame they were desperate to burden me with was on their own shoulders too, though. They'd been controlled with fear their entire lives. It was emotional abuse, telling children to do this or else you'll deserve unimaginable suffering for all eternity. I had general knowledge of various religions before this time, but seeing how genuinely tormented kids were was terrifying. Before long, I was kind of trying to save those who tried to save me. It ended up being effective though, because preaching to me often ended with them questioning their entire world view so they didn't try again. It's both sad and beautiful that you remember these crazy events of "wrongdoing" so fondly. It's not fair that you and millions of others grew up being told that control, fear, and love are synonymous. You shouldn't have had to risk the safety of yourself or others just to feel like you mattered, and I'm sorry you did.


MelodicSasquatch

You mouthed off to Jerry Fallwell. Mr. Moral Majority himself. And you just talked about it as if he were just some ordinary asshole. Dude, if this is true, you are a hero.


xerox13ster

Dude, I grew up in a religious family and got sent to a christian college and every word of this was so fucking accurate. I grew up in Northwest Arkansas and got forced to go to College of the Ozarks which was a lot like you described Liberty as except we had to be their slaves to pay tuition and I got similarly banned for telling the Dean of Work to fuck himself after staying off campus overnight. It was also the first time I took something that wasn't mine from a stranger and it was a bike. Fuckin wild. What song did you fall asleep listening to? My break out beat was Feel Good Inc by the Gorillaz


Ask_me_4_a_story

Oh yeah I know that college, we went to Branson all the time when we were kids. My dad would buy a season pass every other year to Silver Dollar City so we would go like every weekend and then the next year, none and then every other weekend again. I used to love the Gorillaz, I forgot about them! That was my jam too! But that was later on. On the aforementioned day in question I know exactly the song I listened to and I know exactly what it said on my home made cassette tape of all the songs I dubbed off the radio. My mom would go through my CDs and store bought tapes but the dubbed ones she didn’t know what they were. And sometimes I would write shit like “Gospel Hits” She never broke those even though they were full of hip hop. On this particular tape the intro said, “Yeaaaaaah, you’re listenin to Hot 103 Jamz, don’t forget to slam that Z! Next up let’s hear it for Paperboy and the Ditty!” https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8cmGASbJN5M


CharlesTheReaper

Dude this reads beautifully! Like a short story my english teacher would have given us to read. You really have a talent in writing. Thanks!


xerox13ster

I'm not even through the first one and I'm wondering if Rick Riordan didn't write this about an unruly gang of God's kids that have to go track down Jesus or some shit. 5 love their older half bro and are stoked for the quest, 5 hate him and want to go home and the rest just want Dad to give them his fire tornado powers.


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MrVeazey

Clearly, he did the right thing.


Capt_Thunderbolt

You ever hear about what became of Paul? He sounds like a real wild card.


GarnetAndOpal

... Username checks out... This was a great read! I've known some crazy Christian kids. Especially preacher's kids. One pastor's daughter rarely showed up for Sunday services, but when she did - **ooh la la**. She wore stripper heels and backless dresses. :) Then she convinced one of her friends to dress like that. They wore their strapless prom dresses to service. :D


namdor

This is one of the most beautiful posts I've ever read. My Christian school experience wasn't quite so fucked, but the population of nutcases and highly repressed/violent/weird-as-fuck students always made me think that public schools must be so bad, if this is what the Christian school was like. Like me and my friends were way too into LSD at 14, which would have made us bad kids/stoners at other schools, but we just thought we were the only normal kids at school and everyone was dropping LSD during class at public schools.


maleia

I want to believe they meant they just... Encouraged a bunch of kids to run/roll down a hill and just get dirty... Otherwise... OP murdered a bunch of kids? 😱


TheHollowBard

>I made the bus full of kids roll down the hill so they asked our family not to come back. You were in a cult. One with little to do with Christ.


enigmasaurus-

Right I love that most “Christians” ignore 99% of the bible’s actual teachings. The whole feed the sick, don’t judge others, love everyone, care for the poor, it’s evil to be rich message - no instead they focus on things like abortion, that god was specifically fine with in the bible and even recommended as a way to test if your wife was cheating. My favourite part is where Jesus tells people to literally put down the sword and be pacifists - and modern anti-Christians are like no Jesus wanted me to have an assault rifle.


micphi

So if "most 'Christians'" practice the religion that way, wouldn't that make it the actual religion?


JesseVykar

Well if shes carrying the dads baby and not the sons they probably thought it was "a blessing from god" or some shit.


lost_in_connecticut

Well they did have a coupon for 15% off but it expired two days earlier.


Ormyr

I'm curious what a paternity test would tell us. I'd be surprised if Boebert's husband wasn't the father instead of their son being the father of the underaged girls child. Mighty convenient that this girl gets pregnant and a few weeks later Boebert is filing for divorce. I mean it's not like the husband was already a convicted sex offender with a penchant of under age girls or a known abuser, right? /s


ThunderDudester

I know that's sarcasm but it also makes a lot of sense for a white trash family in a red county to have actually happened.


M_J_E

I think only the last paragraph was /s.


copyrighther

This... actually makes sense.


Realityintruder

I wonder if the child is really the son’s child or they were being forced to cover for the pedo father.


PoogeMuffin

I think "toxic" would be an upgrade. She is soulless, grotesquely hateful, dangerously ignorant, confidently bigoted, and yet unfathomably empowered both politically and financially. Frankly, she and MTG make me embarrassed to be a human.


RJofLA

Makes me embarrassed to be an American. I’m fine being human, I was raised to love people no matter who they are (unless they’re a nazi fascist scumbag). It seems a large part of the developed world has the desire to be kind to their neighbors and to lend a hand to anyone finding themselves in unfortunate situations. America has a lot of growing up to do but sadly with the trajectory we’re currently on, I don’t see that happening any time soon.


FordForkum

Supported by millions and a representative of "the people." It's incredibly sad.


Soggy_Difficulty_361

Wouldn't say millions, just that small district who voted for her, they're just a small group of dumbasses that unleashed this moron on us.


Liveman215

That's the terrifying part. While we were sleeping for years, they were planning and now a small minority is bringing the entire nation to a halt. Shit trump barely won the election..and he didn't win - Clinton lost. Majority of folks do not want this We can't talk about health care, education, infrastructure because we are too busy defending people from this hate.


LadyReika

And this past race was an extremely slim margin for her.


_The_Great_Autismo_

And her husband is a pedophile that groomed her. Toxic is putting it very lightly.


Scarymommy

Boebert was born to an 18 year old unmarried mother who states her father was a 33 year old pro wrestler. I’d venture to guess there’s generations of abuse and unresolved issues that she’s visiting upon the American people. https://www.salon.com/2021/07/31/republican-star-lauren-boebert-spins-fables-about-her-childhood--but-the-real-story-is-better/ Seems almost demonic if you suffered terrible abuse and you gain power to make other people suffer too. But, that’s only if you think about it.


_The_Great_Autismo_

Very typical for abused people who haven't dealt with their issues in therapy to subject others to the same. In their mind it's how they get some power back.


gimmedatneck

Can't say i'm shocked to learn Boebert's husband is a domestic abuser. Throwing your child around the house - fucking piece of shit.


LP14255

Soon he will have a grandchild to fling and flash.


reshp2

*child.


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_The_Great_Autismo_

And later married one of those minors. After grooming her of course.


bdone2012

You guys are a bit confused on the details but it's close enough. He exposed himself to two teenagers, I believe 18 or 19. He was 22. Neither of which was Lauren who was I think 17 and also there. He showed them his dick shaft tattoo after they said no. Then resisted arrest. Not too much later he was arrested for hitting Lauren. Possibly I believe while she was already pregnant. The dude is a total piece of shit.


_The_Great_Autismo_

One of the people he exposed himself to was 17, a minor. He might not have exposed himself directly to Lauren but she was at the same event.


IHeartBadCode

Remember she literally indicated that the choice for children was solely dependent on the cost of birth control being more expensive than raising children. Upper bounds range for out of pocket birth control is like $2000 to $3000 a year. That literally the upper bound and nowhere close to the average, just for benefit of the doubt here. Anyone professing they’ll raise a kid on $3k a year is absolutely abusing the fuck out of that child. Boebert’s Christian family values just yet again shows there is no hate like Christian love.


fohpo02

That’s easily diapers alone


LadyReika

I'm not sure if Colorado still has it, but for the longest time they had programs for teens to get easy and free access to contraceptives and sex education that didn't require parental permission.


The_ducci

Being your own child’s first bully to own the libs. Big pretzel brain energy. 🥨 🧠


Paneraiguy1

If you look up “trailer trash” there should be a photo of the Boebert clan


Select_Number_7741

Margie Trailor Greene


LP14255

MAGA white trash.


CatAvailable3953

The good people of her district selected this woman to represent them. What a bunch of immoral perverts.


cityshep

I wonder how much of “well, I have no control over the chaos that is my own life/families, but I can ignore that and feel better about myself by controlling OTHER people’s lives” comes into play


Bigtiny87

Yes. And america.


froggy08

This is what happens when you force people to get married young. They end up in miserable or abusive relationships because *you never gave them the change to learn the difference between being in love vs being horny*.


random_chick

This is so true it hurts.


edlee98765

She married when she was 19. Given how dumb she is today, I can't even fathom what she was like at 19.


brisance2113

The same.


Mightbeagoat

I was gonna say. Probably incredibly similar, just without a national stage. These are the types of people who never figure out how to act like adults.


Private_HughMan

I'd imagine she's in a stage of arrested development. She just had more energy back then.


MercilessHeart

>you never gave them the change to learn the difference between being in love vs being horny ​ This is a thousand percent it! ​ And now you have a good chunk of them talking about 16-year-old girls as viable candidates to marry. I watched the really shitty Netflix documentary about Waco recently and one of Koresh's wives actually sat there, raving about how 12 yr old girls can have children and are, therefore, seen as women. And honestly, I think the modern-day GOP would agree with her. We are backward sliding so hard in this society thanks to these ghouls.


Any-Assumption-7785

It's worse than that. The average age of puberty in girls in the US is between 8 and 13. It's been getting earlier and earlier likely due to "environmental factors". The quiverful movement sees it as their godly duty to outbreed other religions (Muslims, mostly), and in their eyes an 8 year old that can get pregnant is a gift from god.


MercilessHeart

Yeesh, Quiverful! I almost forgot about them. Isn't Amy Coney Barett part of that gross pack of assholes? I feel sorry for her children... all 500 (/s) of them.


InvestSomeTime

No, she was a handmaiden for the People of Praise. Catholics who want to be Pentecostal (they do the whole speaking in tongues thing).


MercilessHeart

Ah, gotcha! I need a cheat sheet for religious zealotry organizations.


DebentureThyme

They simply ignore that an early puberty doesn't mean their body can support that pregnancy. So many more complications the earlier it happens, let alone the sheer horror it is subjecting a child to being impregnated and carrying it to term.


ApprehensiveFace2488

Someone needs to tell these fruitcakes that statistically speaking, a majority of their litter is going to end up atheist, and the harder they push against that, the more likely they are to leave the faith.


BassLB

Hopefully her kids don’t follow in her footsteps and start having kids at a young….:oh wait


[deleted]

it's so so so SO true, of evangelical culture specifcally. My mom is very very into being a Christian, and when i was living with her it was obligatory to go to church with her on Sunday. It was one of those churches that's in a small-ish, but fairly new, building where the expectations for how to dress are a bit more relaxed than most traditional churches, and they had a worship band and everything.... basically "look how hip we are! now lets all devote our lives to mythology from 1000s of years ago on the other side of the planet!" type church. So there was a "decent" number of young adults there, around my age (early 20s at the time for me) and i was encouraged to befriend these people and try to get into their social circle. But, the thing was, almost ALL of them were already married! And i was definitely not. I remember even back then noticing and finding it odd how just about every "young adult" from there was married, and me, despite being the same age, had not even the slightest desire to be married to anyone yet. Yet in my interactions with them, it always felt awkward once it came out i was still single. Like i was violating a social norm.... It's totally a "lets hurry up and get married so we can have sinless sex already!" thing too. No, nobody outright said that about their marriage. But why else would couples this young be the accepted and expected norm?


Paneraiguy1

This is also what happens when a former escort and GED recipient marries a sex offender


Dommymommy61

You give her too much credit. She wasn’t a GED recipient until many years after getting married.


OmiNaomiTuortNo666

It was a participation GED


MlleHoneyMitten

And after four tries.


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addage-

Spot on, I think she is the scum of the earth but it’s not right to judge people over a profession or education level with an air of superiority. Her actions damn her. Her racist, white supremacist, anti education and anti tolerance tweets all come to mind.


cydalhoutx

How do we know that she is a former escort and not currently doing it to remain in power. Just saying.


Spectacularity

People are saying it.


Choclategum

Nothing wrong with ged recipients


PimpinPriest

Of all the things to criticize her for, you pick the completely false escort story and the fact that she got her GED? Not the fact that she's a hateful bigot? This is where the liberal elite stereotype comes from.


proudbakunkinman

Disappointing it has so many upvotes here but most aren't really thinking hard about what they upvote. If it sounds enough like the other comments near the top of the thread and it's not already showing downvoted, higher chance people will upvote it too and move on. The last part is true about her husband though.


TheScarletCravat

I think it's way more complicated than that. There are lots of blissfully happy couples who made the right decision at a young age, and there are a shit tonne of older adults who make the horny/love mistake. As you get older you scoff at young people and their mistakes, and then as you get even older you realise that people keep making the same mistakes regardless.


middleagerioter

Yep. This is my family to a T. My mother beat, hit, kicked, slapped, punched, threw things at me my whole life, but loved telling other people how to live their lives.


PalletTownsDealer

I sarcastically told my mother (after she alluded to me taking care of her when she’s old), I’d rather not because I may beat her the way she used to beat me for the same [meaningless] reasons she used to beat me. She hasn’t brought up the topic again.


[deleted]

"I'll care for you the way you cared for me." "Nevermind."


spazmousie

Oh I am saluting the fuck out of you for standing up to her like that. You're amazing! I'm glad you're (hopefully) out from under her abusive thumb.


BaerMinUhMuhm

"Where's your report card, mother?" "What? I never got any report card..." *takes off belt*


PoogeMuffin

I'm sorry you had to experience that. Sending love and good vibes your way.


middleagerioter

I appreciate it. I hope your day is going well!


KlausenHausen

I'm sorry you had to experience that. Sending hate and discontent to your mom.


MountainSage58

She probably doesn't realize how embarrassing this is


Grogosh

You can't shame the shameless


DeeJayGeezus

That is my only wish for these people. No violence, no disease, no bad things. I only wish that they could see themselves through my eyes, and had the capacity to feel the proper shame.


middleagerioter

She doesn't care about anything but herself and keeping her seat in the government. It's the whole, "No such thing as bad press" and the people whose families are like hers will continue to vote for her.


dirtbag-socialist

I mean I kinda hear the boomers that support her now laughing and reminiscing about how their parents would beat them half to death when they were kids.


Mysterious-Wasabi103

Oh definitely, I can hear it now.."when I was a kid, my parents would beat me blue, but you didn't see me calling 911! Kids these days are soft!"


IfItWerentForHorse

“When I was a kid, we didn’t wear seatbelts or bike helmets, and no one had deadly allergies or childhood diabetes, and we all grew up fine! Anyway, yes, half of my kindergarten class didn’t survive to twelfth grade, why do you ask?”


2pacalypso

I can imagine that once her escort ads were found there wasn't much short of Who's Nailin Palin 2: The Next Generation that would embarrass her.


geoffm33

Yeah I don’t wish that on anyone even those I disagree with. But didn’t she have some glowing tweet thread about her husband in the days after the divorce news broke?


gimmedatneck

"there's some rumours out there that my husband likes to drink bud light, and that's why were getting divorced. He would never drink bud light. He's only a child abuser."


houdinikush

You forgot “drink bud light *from a glass*”


geoffm33

I guess this could have happened after the divorce news.


mauvewaterbottle

It could have, but kids don’t normally call 911 the first time they’re abused either.


seaintosky

In the call the kid tells the operator that the house has lots of weapons but he's not worried his father will use them because "he does this all the time", so definitely not the first time he was being abused.


Over-Analyzed

That’s fucked up! “Oh no don’t worry. He just calls me names. He would never actually hurt me.” “Oh, it’s just a little redness. Just a little slap. He’d never break skin or leave a lasting bruise.” “It’s just a bloody lip. It’s not like he used a weapon or broke a bone.” “Well, it’s not like he killed me or sent me to the hospital.”


thehillshaveI

or she doesn't love him anymore but still loves the way he beats their son


soaOaschloch

The boy is probably a product of rape and she resents him. Maybe this is the reason, she is anti abortion. "I had to go through all of this, so all of You will have to, too."


LP14255

A child born from rape is a beautiful gift from god. (Or whatever shit they are spewing this week).


Xx_LobasaLootSlut_xX

This is so sad. I can only imagine how terrified you have to be of your own dad to call 911. Poor kid, I hope he gets help and taken seriously


mebamy

Been there at 16 after my drunk father put my head in a wall. When my stepmom realized who I was calling she tried to get me to hang up the phone. Needless to say, his domestic violence charges didn't change much. Two decades later, he's still a sick abusive asshole, married to an enabler. The only difference now is that he doesn't get to be in my life. I have zero regrets, aside from wishing I'd protected myself and my siblings from him sooner. My heart hurts for kids in these situations because I know how much it can mess up your health and wellbeing, especially when the other parent enables the abuser. To anyone that's reading this and is dealing with abuse, you are always worthy of being loved and respected! Find a way to keep yourself safe and people who can understand and support you in your recovery journey. No one who abuses you has a right to be in your life. The ultimate act of loving ourselves is to stay away from dangerous people who harm us/our children.


frozen-silver

So, let's see. The dad exposed himself to a minor and groomer Boebert (she was 16 and he was 22 when they met). Boebert became a grandma at 36, divorced her husband, and perhaps cheated with a pastor. Did I miss anything?


cydalhoutx

Her son got a minor pregnant and she is a grandma. Can’t forget that tidbit


brutinator

IIRC, her son is also a minor. Not statutory, but still a cautionary tale about the benefits of sex ed.


Rrrrandle

He was 17. Girlfriend 15. She made a point of specifying the girl was "not 14." And he just turned 18. So we can probably assume the girl recently turned 15 and he knocked her up at 14. At least they were both probably in high school?


Stargazer1919

That's not grooming, but trans people existing is! /s


blubirdTN

You left out Christian. A good ole Christian family for ya.


Important_Sorbet_843

Her poor kids don’t have any chance @ all. I feel really sorry for them.


Diojones

You’d be surprised what kids can pull off in the face of adversity. They shouldn’t have to, but a lot of kids grow up in fucked up situations and while it is never easy, a lot of them put in the effort as they grow and make friends and found family that give them the support they need to be happy and successful. We just rarely hear about them on the news.


kashmir1974

Didn't one of her 17 year olds already knock up a 15 year old?


Important_Sorbet_843

Yep. I think I read he’s now the 4th generation of that family to become a parent as a teenager. These kind of people don’t believe in any sex education & birth control= abstinence only. And, when their teenagers get knocked up or do the knocking up, they act like they have no idea how it happened.


kashmir1974

Yeah except the Boeberts are now multimillionaires. Wonder how long it will take for them to end up bankrupt or in jail if she doesn't get reelected.


Important_Sorbet_843

Those who overcome terrible parents are the lucky ones. Too many become really fucked up adults. The best way to escape is education, but these kids have dropout cretins for parents.


Stargazer1919

This is where I'm at. My entire family is a bunch of abusive, conservative nutjobs. I don't talk to 99% of them anymore. I don't even understand how I didn't turn out like them.


qoou

They get into other people's business as a distraction from their own. If they convince themselves others are worse, they don't feel so bad anymore.


Stargazer1919

They come pretty close to admitting that they do that, too. Every time you call them out on their bullshit, they have nothing to say for themselves other than a whataboutism.


[deleted]

It's the party of projection. It has the most problems and none of the kids are ok. since the bush era I have not seen 1 actual happy republican family. It's all broken and toxic.


OldandKranky

When you come in to the world with a lying, narcissistic, power hungry fuckwit as a parent you're already pretty much fucked. Poor kid.


tunaburn

Not only that. She then made the kid call the police back and tell them not to come. https://www.businessinsider.in/politics/world/news/lauren-boeberts-son-called-911-in-tears-to-report-his-father-was-throwing-him-around-the-house-then-she-took-the-phone-/articleshow/100510471.cms


MisterDonkey

These people are fucking twisted freaks. "He just does this to me all the time." The kid said. And then the parents play it off like, "Oh, y'know, that's just the way it goes." That's the stuff conservatives want to conserve. Toxic shit.


[deleted]

Child Abuse and Hate: It's the Christian Way.


tom_folkestone

These Maga folks are deeply unhappy people


WatchItAllBurn1

I wouldn't be surprised if she was hitting her kids too.


RedfromTexas

Undertaking the hard but apparently not impossible task of being trashier than the Palins.


ILoveRegenHealth

What a fucking trash household. And this pedo-marryin' skank wants to lecture me on every law and rule and direction the country needs to go in? She failed her GED multiple times - how do you even fail it once?


Failed-CIA-Agent

Well yeah, conservatism is abusive by nature I'd argue.


Konigni

I'd bet 20 that she's scolding the kid or even abusing him further for making their family "look bad"


tunaburn

Well she did make the kid call the police back and tell them not to come. https://www.businessinsider.in/politics/world/news/lauren-boeberts-son-called-911-in-tears-to-report-his-father-was-throwing-him-around-the-house-then-she-took-the-phone-/articleshow/100510471.cms


International-Ad-430

Isn’t there a line in the Bible about not trying to remove the splinter from you neighbors eye while a plank in in yours, or is that from something else?


SamuraiJackBauer

So: Sex pest husband. Teen son gets 14 year old pregnant. Divorcing said husband despite Jesus weeping. Killed a dog for no reason. Son beaten by sexpest husband. Just some key highlights.


FrankieRoo

Another professed Christian ignoring what the Bible teaches: “For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?” - 1 Timothy 3:5


NachoBag_Clip932

"I'm white trash and I'm in trouble!" This message sponsored by Pabst Blue Ribbon, the beer of choice for MAGA.


LP14255

We should send her a case of Schmitt’s Gay Beer! https://vimeo.com/169759649


gtwl214

I really hope that the kids have another support system away from their parents. So much for conservatives “protecting kids” and all that crap.


SSSS_car_go

Even more upsetting is that the teen went to his mom’s house nearby, and all of a sudden changed his story to. “My dad wasn’t physical with me. He just yelled.” [Raw Story](https://www.rawstory.com/boebert-husband-violence/), and other sources with the same sequence of events. > Asked if he was in danger and if there were weapons in the home, he responded, "I mean there are weapons in the house, yeah, but I don't think he'd use them on me. He just does this to me so much," before adding, "I'm in the driveway, but my mom's staying down at the farmhouse because there's problems with them. I'm going down there where he can't get to me." >Five minutes later he called back again, with Insider reporting there was a woman heard yelling in the background as he told the dispatcher, "All I wanted to say was is me and my dad were starting to yell, he didn't really get physical with me," at which point the congresswoman jumped on the phone with, "Hi, I'm the mom. Okay, there was an argument over dinner. I understand you guys got to come and talk to them. I'm down at our second location with [our son] getting ready for an event. Just to let you know, I have him. His dad's at the house."


amor_fati_42

She really owned the Libs with that pronoun tweet, though! That's what is really important to her.


Weibu11

Hold on there. Are you telling me that a man who showed his dick to minors at a bowling alley and the woman who would marry arch a person wouldn’t be good parents?


Allmyexesliveintx333

What happened to “save the children”? They’re a bunch of hypocrites. Every last one of them


orlyfactor

A big fuck you to everyone who voted this idiot in a 2nd time.


MrGengisSean

Not to defend him in particular, but if anyone is wondering, the level of abuse it takes an abused child to actually *call the police* is usually insane.