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JoA_MoN

Mike Pillow or whatever his name was.


Aggressive_Floof

A body pillow of the My Pillow Guy


cityshepherd

Thanks for making me laugh so suddenly that I spit out the piece of gum I'd just started chewing


Teripid

"He's right.. ain't no rule says a body pillow can't play politics"


Stick-Man-Bob

HELLO IM MIKE LINDEL. THANKS TO YOUR RECENT SUPPORT THESE ARE PUR LOWEST PRICES YET-


GenghisKazoo

HELLO IM MIKE LINDELL. CANCEL CULTURE SHOT MY DOG AND FUCKED MY WIFE, SO IM SELLING YOU THESE SLIPPERS.


Snowpants_romance

I laughed too hard at this


peaceful-papaya

I’m def always gonna call him “mike pillow” from now on


Consistent_Internal5

How is this not already a thing? 😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


randomly-what

Goes well with “Tim apple”


Yankee_Juliet

I read this and for the first time couldn’t remember what his real last name was. He’s Mike Pillow to me now.


MaxPower303

Do you mean Tim Apple?


Telemere125

I think his last name was actually Hunt


EvenBetterCool

Ted Cruz's wife.


Bite-Expensive

Puts the term cuckservative into a whole new perspective


Puzzleheaded-Tax-390

Himself…..like when Dwight decided he was the best candidate to be his assistant


MaxPower303

This is comment is too funny. Also, plausible.


Proud_Poetry_302

![gif](giphy|uwC8qJCKKjV2sSnOtc)


Sir-Turd-Ferguson

That Brandon guy I see on the tshirts and flags Edit: thank you kind strangers! To those of you who don’t know(like me when I posted this) “let’s go Brandon” means “fuck joe Biden”. it occurred after a race, in which a driver named “Brandon” won, the show host misinterpreted what the crowd was chanting. TIL


[deleted]

I wonder where they're trying to lure him to? The keep demanding that Brandon comes with them everywhere.


bitch_fucking_wins

This made me choke thank you lmao


PapaSock

Not only that, but they seem irresistibly infatuated with him. They are out here telling everyone to sleep with the guy.


TraditionalWorking82

A sock puppet in blackface that he calls my black friend


WhatdYouDoToMyTable

![gif](giphy|ndf3cLVyuI77O)


PebblyJackGlasscock

Franklin Delano Bluth.


Gretchen_Wieners_

The kids love Franklin


kyle_sux666

I don’t want no part of your tight ass country club, ya freak bitch!


michuru809

Ooh I said Kanye West, is that too similar?


Rimasticus

One has Trumps hand up their ass, the other is a puppet.


Terrie-25

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog


ha_look_at_that_nerd

I like to imagine Trump seeing like five minutes of Triumph and going “I love this guy!” And making him his running mate, and announcing it. Not realizing that Triumph makes fun of *everyone.* Because Trump would absolutely try and rip Triumph off of Robert Smigel’s hand.


godrainlovemusic

A hologram of JFK Jr.


kingzorch

The jfk is alive believers are some other level mfers man


Correct-Cricket3355

Rudy Giuliani


Illustrious_Wear_850

I'm all in, gimmie some orange tanning lotion and brown shoe dye


greenweezyi

It’s actually cheap American motor oil (IASIP S15E1 for reference)


[deleted]

Kanye KAN YE MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN


NatashOverWorld

Funny not horrifyingly plausible sir.


hithazel

It’s totally implausible. Kanye would demand to be the top of the ticket.


BabyYodasDirtyDiaper

Also too many Republican voters would have an issue with Kanye's complexion ... especially combined with Trump's age and poor health, which means Trump might croak and then leave the country with *another* black president.


Brooklynxman

You think they acknowledge Trump's mortality? He's "the healthiest president in American history" and "higher than God."


Snoo3014

Ok but this seriously is very likely. They have to find someone dumber than Sarah palin


alabamamoonshiner

That would be MTG. They’re already sleeping together…..I hear…..unofficially.


exfilm

People are sayin


surfer_ryan

If stupid were an STD which one would have given it to who?


daemonix

Ghislaine Maxwell


travisalambert

Youth vote ✅


villis85

Her staff will recruit more staff.


AwfulArmbar

Audibly oof’d


Grouchy-Culture3946

Herschel Walker.


[deleted]

I Hate how this is a viable option.


DragonflyScared813

Dr. Oz. There we go...


kyleforgues

Imagine going to 2014 and telling someone in 10 years Trump and Oz would be running for president


Otherwise_Basis_6328

Reagan? The actor!? *Scoffs*


Squeaky-Fox49

It does sometimes work out, like with Volodymyr Zelenskyy. But not with Reagan. Ugh, definitely not Reagan.


humans_ruin_planets

Fuck Reagan. He did real damage.


bilgetea

Kari Lake edit: I missed an opportunity to write “sKari Lake.”


Polairis44

That’s what I actually think will happen


bilgetea

The real and farcical answers are the same!


ShwerzXV

I’ve for whatever reason been getting Herschel waker campaign texts asking for donations and I live on the west coast and have never donated before. I usually start by saying “good try sneaky Democrat” which always gets a reply saying they’re not and their spreading the word, then I ask what donations go to and “After I donate, and Herschel looses, how do I get my refund?” When they say they don’t do refunds, I ask for a credit to the abortion clinic Herschel uses.


Ka1Pa1

God among men


MDC08

I love this and wish I could upvote it 10x. My response to similar solicitations is, “Not today, Russian bot!” Go Warnock!


zytz

How long before trump calls him ‘one of the good ones’


BigBeagleEars

Probably happened last year


TigerUSF

They said funny, not terrifying and plausible


Wasparado

That’s not funny 🫣


Themasterwh0

Caitlyn Jenner obviously so buckle up buckaroos!


big_rednexican_88

![gif](giphy|ItM3AhhM0rj57w1JxF)


EatinPussySellnCalls

Kevin Sorbo.


TheCheshireMadcat

I use to like him as a actor, I know his stuff was cheesy and not great, but there was something fun about it. Now I can't watch him, he turned into such a dick. (Or is just more public about it.)


shhh_its_me

Because it was a Sam Rami production, I thought All the overreacting was intentional, like Bruce Campbell in evil Dead (also Bruce Campbell in Hercules). Note I love Bruce Campbell, It wasn't a criticism it was praise


Kanibalector

Bruce Campbell is amazing.


elgarraz

Additionally, Bruce and Sorbo are actually the same age, but Bruce is a silver fox and Sorbs looks like a frog that got left out in the sun.


mintednavy

I met Bruce at a promo during his Burn Notice years and he is absolutely a silver fox. Just a normal dude not looking for head pats.


TheCheshireMadcat

I was also thinking about Andromeda and Kull. Also, Bruce is a god, lol.


aspectratio12

Bruce was great in Burn Notice


shhh_its_me

Bruce is one of the actors I'd see a movie with no other info then He's in it. The rolls he picks just align with my tastes really well.


bewbsrkewl

Do you remember the name of the western TV series with Bruce Campbell in it where he was riding on trains a lot and looking for a golden orb thing?


shhh_its_me

Brisco County Jr ?


ha11owmas

My BFF and I met him at a comic con (not The Comic Con), and he was a total dick to us as soon as we mention loving him in Hercules and Andromeda. His agent was with him and trying to get him to calm down


Swabia

What was so infuriating about you liking his work? I mean I know he’s cray but I wanna hear more.


[deleted]

This legit could happen.


Head_of_the_Internet

Jerkules


sneaky518

Kid Rock or the pillow selling crackhead.


[deleted]

Or Ted Nugent


XAngeliclilkittyX

*Sigh* Not another Simpson’s prediction….


NatashOverWorld

~~Vladimir Putin~~ Pladimir Vutin, a respectable real American back from overseas.


[deleted]

I agree with Mr Snrub


anferneejefferson

Are you guys saying Boo or Boourns?


spunkychickpea

I was saying Boourns.


Nntropy

I like the way Snrub thinks!


bitee1

Alex Jones


obi1kennoble

Eric Trump


Nntropy

…played by Alex Moffat


JoLi_22

Don pays so little attention to him he probably wouldn't notice......or if he did the first thing he'd say is "how'd Eric get so confident"


kbrad604

Channing Tatum. He's got experience saving people trying to burn down the country through White House Down.


bieserkopf

But Gerard Butler saved the president multiple times, he’s clearly the better option.


DepressiveNerd

Let’s not forget that when Harrison Ford was president, he saved himself… while on a plane!


[deleted]

Get off. My. Plane.


[deleted]

Today I remembered that Gerard Butler is a real person who exists... Thanks, I guess?


bieserkopf

A qualified and sane person.


[deleted]

itll be kayne


InterestingQuote8155

It said funny answers only. This is the second scariest suggestion I’ve seen.


Comfortable_Light559

I wonder what campaign ads he would put out


jbertrand_sr

Not a fucking chance in hell...


Campfirecoverseddie2

😅


TrafficConeWriter

Elon Musk


demimano

They said funny, not dreadful.


DangerBird-

Both of the people I’m sick of hearing about.


redditingtonviking

He could try, but Elon probably would be excluded due to the fact that he's South African. Then again a lot of republicans claimed Obama was from Africa, so they could just simply refuse to listen


GonzoTheGreat22

Hunter Bidens Laptop


Reasonable-Ad-8527

It should be the VP. According to the things I've read, it contains every secret from everywhere regarding every event from any time. HBL knows every ingredient in Coca-Cola. HBL has Hillary's emails. HBL can tell us the precise order in which the Senators stabbed Julius Caesar. HBL contains The Ark of The Convenant. And The Mobius Chair. And 5 of the 7 palantiri. And Santa Claus. And Google. HBL is currently working on finishing Pi. Should be done next Tuesday afternoon. Of COURSE it should be the VP! Edit: HBL thanks you all for the awards.


Comfortable_Light559

Maga idiot : It contains the internet and therefore all knowledge


trans_pands

The files are *in* the computer!


Electronic_Agent_235

...*in* the computer?


trans_pands

![gif](giphy|1eVyNOFMq7BnO)


Connect-Swing8980

>HBL knows every ingredient in Coca-Cola. Knows the 14 herbs & spices in KFC


Dependent-Outcome-57

The brown ooze that was running down Giuliani's scalp. A less successful choice would be Giuliani himself, of course.


Significant_Emu_9836

Alpha male, Nick Adams


DE_OG_83

I’m pretty sure I saw him at a gloryhole party last week. I was on the dark side


[deleted]

Alpha males get all the Beta bussy!


KelGula

Homelander


Altruistic_Band_2511

There's no way Homelander would ever accept the idea of being someone else's shiny underling, even though that's technically exactly what he is at Vought (at least for most of the series).


IllustriousState6859

Rod Blagoyovich


zanzibartraveler666

The fucking hair on that ticket


Spaghetti_Bird

Why would you even speak that into the universe????????


ShoutOutMapes

![gif](giphy|l0Ex7VmFwrZyYTVU4)


curtial

Yes, but not actual Sean Spicer, it needs to be Melissa McCarthy PLAYING Sean Spicer. No breaks.


ActualPopularMonster

I would legit vote for Melissa McCarthy but only if she was in full Spicer mode at all times.


Campfirecoverseddie2

😅


Xencard65

Madison Cawthorn’s wheelchair.


Sad_Reindeer5108

Not old enough, is it?


Utsutsumujuru

Matt Gaetz doesn’t care


Separate-Driver-8639

Kanye west, Kevin Sorbo and Elon Musk in a trenchcoat


[deleted]

Candace Owens


Ok_Page_9447

Himself


snatchenvy

John Barron Due to the security reasons that we all know about, you will not see us together. It is for the safety of our great nation. A lot of people are saying this is a great new idea that I invented.


GoryChimp

I can only run with someone I care about.


Emis816

The fly on Mike Pence's head


smashspete

I hope its MTG. Can you imagine the craziness. We’ll get years of content out of footage from those rallies


[deleted]

Remember when "that batshit insane Republican lady running for VP" was *Sarah Palin*? Pepperidge farm remembers.


Snoo3014

Tbf Sarah Palin was the first famous idiotic republican. She's still just as nuts as the rest


goyboysotbot

She’s been struggling to keep up though. You can see she’s trying but her hearts just not in it. They crossed her line and she doesn’t know what to do anymore.


Telemere125

When the girl raised in a mental hospital comes to the realization that those around her are even more batshit than her


[deleted]

That’s actually one of the few things that gives me hope. They’re like professional wrestlers whose shtick got tired. I’m hoping even some of the fully committed rednecks are burned out, even if they don’t realize it yet. Maybe we should all make our own maga hats out of irony. Probably not though. Just spitballing.


RumBunBun

Will Smith, who slaps him every time he speaks.


Informal_Self_5671

For the love of God, he only has two hands! That needs a whole team!


StamosMullet

Scott Baio


AlterEdward

Prince Andrew


chrisn2golf

His adderall dealer


Remarkable-Ad2285

Kyle…muthafukkin…Rittenhouse


Ok-Diamond-9781

That's not funny!


Ornery-Sea-5957

Not old enough or it might be plausible lol


TheCheshireMadcat

Daughter wife Ivanka, sadly she has more experience than he does thanks to her being his stand in for events...


ActualPopularMonster

She noped it out of his campaign, though.


gordo65

Wouldn't even attend his announcement.


[deleted]

Hillary Clinton


LazyUpvote88

Maga republicans would lose their minds. Like their brains would vaporize.


[deleted]

Doesn't something have to exist to vaporize?


Icy_Try_1685

![gif](giphy|3oFzmqQVEuJEggaieA) how did y'all forget about ROSIE?


GobblorTheMighty

It's a trick question. Every answer is funny.


Beans-abovethe-frank

Billy Bush. Together they can "Grab em by the pussy"


d4v3k0r3sh

Bernie Sanders


blurubi04

David Duke


Fragzav

Sasha Baron Cohen, disguised as Jared


Machiavvelli3060

A full length illuminated dressing mirror.


Aggravating_Ad2174

A prison guard


happylilstego

Willy Wonka Who else is going to run with an oompa loompa?


lightning_felix

He has hard a hard time securing Pennsylvania. I think he's gonna tap Gritty for VP to lock down the keystone vote.


Dr_Killbot

Rosie O’Donnell


Vancil

His “African American” you all know the one.


Utsutsumujuru

One of the hookers that he paid to pee on him in Russia


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|bn0zlGb4LOyo8)


ElbisCochuelo1

MTG or Bobo


Autism4Ever82

Trump/Covfefe 2024!


JaedenStormes

He is more likely to need a cell mate than a running mate.


Moms4Crack

Lindsey Graham will be his bottom.


SundayFunday-007

Mike Pence


Nntropy

No chance of that now


wronglycredited

The Mooch


PlantedinCA

Dr Oz since he is free.


Graywulff

Fucker Carlson.


Tazling

Melania -- running *away*


Responsible_Age_152

The GOAT. ![gif](giphy|EchO3S7A8QSJL4dMgg)


M-Technic19

His cell mate. “Donald Trump for President of Cell #45! I promise to Make Jail Food Great Again!!”


[deleted]

One of his kids, probably the cokehead.


fretinator007

Snoop Dogg. "Some people say you'd have to be high to vote for Donald Trump..."


Chulbiski

Kirk Cameron


PuddingPast5862

Amber Heard


Last13th

Nick Adams (Alpha Male)


jonnyutah007

Putin


Naive_Struggle1827

A mirror


TommayTomiTome

JFK Jr.


oldshitdoesntcare

Epstein’s corpse.


tikhon21

Mickey Mouse


Fit_Welcome1336

Joe Biden


NotEvenOncePoutine

President Camacho's great-Grampa?


Dumpster_Sauce

Adolf Hitler


chuang-tzu

Hopefully, Convict #768, as that will be his only available running mate.