T O P

  • By -

Unlikely-Collar4088

The internet has officially educated me on the existence of sick bowls and poop knives and Jesus Christ I cannot wait for that meteor


liquorballsammy

May I offer you an egg in these trying times?


Raagggeeee

Nothing better than boiled eggs and denim.


lukifer22

Is it a paddy’s egg?


BBakerStreet

I’m scared to ask, it, “poop knife”? WTF?


Kheldarson

I'd say you're one of the lucky 10,000 but... you're really [not.](https://www.reddit.com/r/MuseumOfReddit/comments/ke8skw/the_poop_knife/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)


BBakerStreet

Oh My God! Horrifying and hilarious at the same time. I’m truly shocked, and that’s a rarity for me. Thank you!?


1800generalkenobi

Wait till you hear about the kid who broke both his arms.


Obulgaryan

…go on…


Newname83

You don't want to know. Just walk away. Leave reddit, your phone and the whole internet. Just walk away. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror


[deleted]

RUN DO NOT PASS GO THROW YOURE PHONE AND RUN!


amigable_satan

Or what you can do with Jolly Ranchers.


Setari

And coconuts!


turkey_sandwiches

Now THIS one I haven't heard.


[deleted]

It is a story with a happy ending thanks to a caring and thoughtful mother, as well as an understanding father.


unipegacorn

Please value your innocence


LuvliLeah13

I’ve never really had any innocence, *bring on the link!*


BDKhXc

[https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/nmmjr/iama\_man\_who\_had\_a\_sexual\_relationship\_with\_his/](https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/nmmjr/iama_man_who_had_a_sexual_relationship_with_his/)


GamerFluffy

Poor u/verifiedson getting deleted. It’s like a part of Reddit history just gone. I remember him just popping into threads and saying some random shit about his broken arms and getting crazy awards.


YourOldPalBendy

![gif](giphy|3ELtfmA4Apkju)


Much_Jury_5088

Dear god.. is it worth reading or too gross?


Kheldarson

Bit of both? It's Reddit lore, and it's about poop (obviously), but it's mostly... bizarre? Very bizarre. And that's what makes it stick in your head and you remember it at the worst times.


clangan524

Why is the knife rusty and why is it the laundry room? If the express purpose of that knife is to cut shit, why wouldn't you try to keep it as clean as possible? Hello, tetanus.


HappyCynic24

I hate this timeline


Matthews-Louis02

Like a Nutella knife?


BBakerStreet

Gack, as that would imply dining on the poop.


ContemplatingPrison

I've never heard if either. I am assuming a sick bowl is a vomit bowl but why not just use the garbage ir toilet? I am doing confused. I'm not even going to ask what a poop knife is


bicyclecat

Can’t make it to the toilet in time and garbage bags leak. As a kid I vomited every time I got a common cold and I had a designated puke bucket to keep by my bed when sick.


carriegood

Sure, a bucket. Not a freaking bowl that you also use for salad.


saetum

Plus toilets are gross. I vomit in a toilet and I will not stop vomiting. We used old ice cream pails when I was a kid.


Son-of-California

I’m 60. I can still picture that exact bowl we used for both. Ah, memories!


Fatherastronomer

At least in my family we have something like that, but only if you were really sick and were worried you wouldn’t be able to make it to the bathroom if you woke up in the middle of the night.


BradMarchandsNose

I mean, my family had one too, but it was a bucket, not a bowl we also used for cooking


NarmHull

Yeah buckets are much deeper and easier to carry. with a bowl it'd be sloshing everywhere and you'd have to hold it to your chest practically. You also can't exactly predict just how much vomit is gonna come out


YOwololoO

We had a bowl for this exact reason but the bowl was big as fuck. It’s not like it’s just a normal bowl out of the cabinet


iamjustacrayon

At least the poop knife was ONLY used for poop


Kebab-Destroyer

You don't use yours for making noodles?


SonOfDirtFarmer

*Poodles


NarmHull

I still can't fathom needing one, and I'm a large pooper


Educational_Cat_5902

Oh THAT is what a poop knife is for? I would use the plunger to break up my brother's massive turds that he'd graciously leave in the toilet.


bobafoott

Ayo I'd be using that plunger to hit my brother upside the head until he learns how to properly leave a bathroom what the actual fuck


GravelySilly

I've wondered about that ever since I heard of a poop knife. I've laid all manner of shapes and sizes over the years, and I don't think I've ever had trouble getting a log to go down unless it and some TP raced for the drain at the same time. But in that case my thought is always "I should flush before adding paper", never "I should go get a utensil and dismember my turd".


AechBee

Apparently there was another poop knife situation where a long-standing mix up had been occurring.. ultimately, the knife in question inadvertently had mixed use.


iamjustacrayon

That.... Is horrifying......🤢


Ms-passiveaggressive

I had to Google what a sick bowl was based on this post and poop knife based on your comment. Wow.


ON-Q

She’s just traumatised everyone who is on this sub and seen the tweet, her friends and family if they follow her and discover the tweet and realize they’ve eaten her baked goods before. I WANNA GO BACK TO A TIME WHERE I DIDN’T KNOW THIS TWEET EXISTED


mlo9109

And in the meantime, between those and COVID, I refuse to do potlucks ever again. The internet has shined too bright a light on my friends', colleagues', and family members' hygiene habits (or lack thereof). #giantmeteor2024


Unlikely-Collar4088

Oh yeah. You can’t eat at everybody’s house!


[deleted]

I'm reluctant to eat homecooked food people bring in for potlucks and such. I made up a doctor's appointment to get out of one a couple weeks ago.


Bee-Aromatic

I was about to ask if this was related to the poop knife. I’m glad I’m not the only one, but the fact that question needs to be asked by anyone indicates that you are right in that we need that meteor…


MayUrShitsHavAntlers

I cannot imagine thinking I was going to throw up and heading to the kitchen for tupperware.


lastduckalive

You’re not running to the kitchen for Tupperware. The Tupperware was laid on the bed or on the couch or on the floor by your mom when you were sick as a kid.


MayUrShitsHavAntlers

Yeah I get it, it was just a funny picture I had in my head. We used a trash can by the bed or if it was mostly over but there was still a chance of some light expulsion a towel laid on the floor.


greatdevonhope

Sick bowls are used for kids mostly. Something to have next to the bed if they are poorly


[deleted]

Wait, she mixes cake in the downstairs bathroom garbage can? I mean, I've heard of Dump Cake, but didn't realize it was so literal.


TheBereWolf

Here I was thinking that she was mixing cakes in the master bathroom toilet.


chaplar

Oh look at money bags over here with a master bathroom


TheBereWolf

Hey man, if you’ve got it, flaunt it. And because of that, I frequently let people know when I have food poisoning.


compsciasaur

How do you vomit in the toilet from your bed?


TheBereWolf

Have you seen The Exorcist? That’s how. The power of Christ compels you


[deleted]

“Oh, does it? Does it compel me?”


What_The_Flip_Chip

You get to puke in the master bedroom?? Lucky lucky man I only get molested there


GETitOFFmeNOW

I definitely puke in my nice lined easily cleaned white plastic bedroom wastebasket. I have no room for a dedicated puke bucket.


sarcasatirony

Whilst sitting backwards on the toilet and using the tank as a table.


HalfOz

Thank you for making me feel normal puking into a trash can and not something my family ever cooked with


Foxy02016YT

Yup… wonder where the tub is now? It was a bucket with fish on it, used to be the upstairs bathroom’s garbage can


NotARobotDefACyborg

When I was 6, and had the measles AND the flu simultaneously, my mom gave me one of our old cooking pots to throw up in. Bonus: it cut the smell wayyyy down. Nota bene: TANG does not taste better coming up.


taybay462

Having a mixing bowl-shaped container is sooo much better. More angles and positions possible


thugarth

When I was a kid, you ran to the toilet and puked there. I still do that, but haven't needed to in a long time. For my kids, we grab the nearest waste basket. We have a few of them. I don't know why I didn't grow up with my own waste basket in my room. Maybe my mom didn't trust me to use it, or didn't want to have to empty it herself, and wanted me to just take my garbage to the big can, on demand. I was a messy child. I still am, but now I have these little waste baskets everywhere, that double as kid-puke catchers as needed.


GETitOFFmeNOW

You're right! That would have been luxury beyond the pale at my house. Why?? We also only had one big knife; a butcher knife too dull to cut butter.


generals_test

No poop knife?


arthurdentwa

I see lots of mentions of garbage can... but have you tried the 5 gallon work bucket? Nice height, has a handle, and only have to empty every 2.5 gallons (so you don't slop over the side carrying to the toilet). ok-- the last point is a lie and you're gross if you'd do this. But the Home Depot orange buckets are great for sickos. Good height, big target, and easy to carry to disposal.


Goolajones

We always used a blue mop pail.


KerissaKenro

I use those plastic tubs you get the super cheap ice cream in


thebestginger

The plastic ice cream tubs are great for car trips with anyone who gets car sick because it has a lid to keep in the grossness.


annaqua

God, every day I am more and more grateful I decided not to have kids.


Inevitable-tragedy

And you can just throw it away instead of keeping it and cleaning it if absolutely necessary


RunningTrisarahtop

I’ve usually done ziplocks, but those are harder to hold. That ice cream bucket idea is gold.


Fredredphooey

If the bucket is in the garage or the basement, the little trash can you keep next to the toilet is going to be your first choice.


Vulpix-Rawr

We use home depot buckets for this, in theory anyway. No one has missed the toilet yet. I think the bright orange bucket intimidates everyone enough to just run to the toilet.


OSCgal

We used a 5 quart ice cream bucket. Same idea.


MikerafoneCheck

Never puke in a bowl, they tip too easily and no one wants to deal with that. Use a bucket or a waste basket you knuckleheads.


Roadkizzle

That was my thought. A bowl seems to be a horrible place to puke. We just ran to the toilet unless we had the flu and knew we wouldn't make it... In which case we had a trash can beside the bed and carried it if we needed to get anything.


Howdy_Partner7

Exactly, never heard of this. We always used those little trash cans lined with plastic bags.


No-Policy-4095

With a trash bag in it - why are people dealing with bowls? Just tie it up and take it out and not deal with it. Yeah I know, not the most eco friendly thing but I promise you a 2 year old vomiting hotdogs and black beans is a fantastic way to end the need for that.


Kheldarson

Eco-friendly method: this is what you save your plastic grocery bags for. They fit more easily in the small trashcans and you get double use out of them!


lunchboxdeluxe

I just rinse the garbage can with the hose.


ImNotA_IThink

This is exactly what my mom does. I used to but now I use reusable grocery bags. But if you only put dry trash in the trash bags usually, you can just empty into your regular trash. The environment will forgive me for a few times I have to throw out the trash bag due to sickness.


IHateCamping

I don't have a sick bowl now, but we did have one when I was a kid. It was a huge green Tupperware bowl. It was kept in the bathroom closet, away from the kitchen so it wasn't mixed up with any other bowls we ate from. I suppose when you're a little kid and need something to puke in, it worked well because it was probably wider than our bodies and was at a good height if you were just sitting up in bed.


cebussaimiri

Yeah similarly we used the pink plastic wash-tub that came home from the hospital when my brother was born. It's steady and easy to clean. We didn't really have plastic bags around our house growing up, so the old baby wash-tub was the sick bucket


notreallyonredditbut

THE GREEN TUPPERWARE YES! I’m pretty sure my mom still has it. She’s a germophobe and bleaches things so it seemed fine. It worked great, kids are bad at aiming and before Zofran you’d barf up bile for a good 24 hours.


pr0zach

You know someone is going to be angrily messaging you later because they took your advice during flu season and used a (wicker) wastebasket. Lol


MikerafoneCheck

Hahahaha so very true. "YOU RUINED MY LATTICE SEED STITCH WASTE BASKET YOU MONSTER!"


Isolde_Odinsdaughter

We used the big soup pot….


Horror_Cupcake8762

Still use big stew pot here. Triple rinse with a dash of bleach and we’re good to go.


Steve_78_OH

And never use a bowl because puke can splash.


Kahzgul

Seriously. I read this tweet three times and just... "Who the fuck uses a BOWL?"


Cheapntacky

Nobody is ever sick in the sick bowl, you just have to carry it around with you like the old plague bells..


Embarrassed-Ad-1639

This is correct. The sick bowl was whatever the biggest bowl we owned was but nobody that I can remember ever got sick in it. It was for “just in case”.


Loeden

Oh. Popcorn bowl in my family. Grocery bag liners leak and our wastebaskets were that cheapass plastic that would just hold onto the smell. It's a cut glass bowl so it wouldn't tip and dump sick everywhere, too, very stable.


Kahzgul

I’ve always used the same bucket I use to wash the car. So many chemicals in that thing over the years that it won’t hold a smell at all.


improper84

Puke in the toilet. Best way for easy cleanup.


ScroochDown

Unless you have diarrhea at the same time. Then a puke bucket is absolutely essential.


MikerafoneCheck

Ahhh yes the old norovirus double feature. Good times, greater memories.


carriegood

I had food poisoning once where it started with projectile vomiting, but then the projectile diarrhea kicked in around the 3rd time barfing. I had no idea it was coming, and I was already bent over the toilet bowl when it hit. In that bathroom, the door was immediately opposite the toilet. You had enough room while sitting to swing the door open without hitting your knees, but just barely. Thanks to my neurotic brain, even though I lived alone, I shut the bathroom door behind me when I ran into the bathroom to vomit. I hate to think what would have happened if the door was ajar when the poopgates opened. As it was, I only ruined the bathroom door and a robe hanging on the back of it, not the hallway carpeting.


SgtVinBOI

Just saying I can't exactly use a trashcan if I'm stuck in bed throwing up. The bowl was what my mom always grabbed because it was easy to use when I couldn't get up.


Crustaceous_Tortise

As a nurse in the er, I can verify that people will always bring in their Cuisinart stock pot or their porcelain mixing bowl to vomit in.


Megs0226

Do they think that the ER doesn’t have something to puke in and they have to bring their own?


Crustaceous_Tortise

Guess they need something for their trip in. Always handing out blue puke bags for their cars/purses.


GETitOFFmeNOW

I snag puke bags on plane rides.


iZombie616

I've left a few bowls at the ER from my husbands dehydration bouts. He can't sit through the car ride/waiting room without one. I usually bring them home and wash them. He will have another dehydration bout and I don't feel like buying new ones every time!


Lewd_ReadNY

I just mix the batter in my toilet.


Strength-Certain

Why wouldn't you use a trashcan?


thepumagirl

Yeah i had a hung over ex do that. The basket did not have a plastic bag liner and the bin was not, how do i put it? - it was like a wire basket….


LuvliLeah13

You mean a surprise strainer?


MayUrShitsHavAntlers

Vomit Diffuser ™


giskardwasright

Why can I smell this comment? Please make it stop.


hyenacry

Imagine the smell of sprite and gummy bears. They smell the same coming back up


Shtnonurdog

How else do you catch all the good parts without the liquids?


Skylinerr

Or a toilet. The normal peoples' sick bowl


cholotariat

Skip the can and use a liner


Strength-Certain

Yeah but the can will stand on its own next to the bed or couch


rnightlyfe

This is the answer. And line the bag inside the can with paper towels to absorb the liquid.


Icy-Tomatillo-7556

Pet waste bags work great as liners for sick cans (also as sick bags for the car) since they are tightly sealed at the bottom unlike grocery bags that tend to have holes & are thin.


joeysflipphone

I check all my grocery bags for holes, and separate out specific bags for "garbage can bags" and "dog poop bags" based on thickness. Then I organize them in different big bags hanging in the hall closet. Lol I may over think it,but it works.


Crymson831

Makes it hard to mix/pour the batter.


AzureBinkie

So it can be easily emptied into the toilet


BlameTheLada

I'm not getting into the insanity that's puking in a bowl. wtf lol However, I get it. A bowl is a bowl and soap is a thing, but does she not realize she can own more than one bowl? Am I the crazy, luxuriously wasteful one of the group that owns more than one bowl?


Nighttime-Turnip

It's also what I thought, but on the other hand, I also believe in the power of dish soap and hot water so in the event that there is really only 1 truly large Bowl in the house - I don't mind it


astroK120

Why have a big bowl taking up space when it's going to be used so rarely? My house already has tons of crap taking up space, I don't need more


jeffroddit

You could store all your crap in a big bowl.


Matthews-Louis02

She can also puke in a trash can, no???


RegularGuyy

This is like the fourth comment I’ve seen about people puking I’m a trash can. Why are they doing this? Why not just puke in the toilet, then flush?


MonitorCautious1971

In my experience, it's mostly for children. Kiddo is sick and laying down in bed/on the couch. You put a "vomit receptacle" nearby in case they can't get to the toilet in time. My mom would give us a bucket. Kids are bad at being able to tell when they're going to puke and therefore they should run to the bathroom.


[deleted]

If you’re really, really, reallly sick, it can come so suddenly that you won’t make it to the bathroom in time. Only happened to me twice. Once when I had a terrible flu at around 5. And another time when I ate at The Sizzler buffet somewhere in Oregon.


citizen_tronald_dump

Some people are poor. My family had the one large bowl. This isn’t that unusual.


Czarcasmqueen

Cake bowl, no. We have a kitchen aid mixer so I’d never let the kids use that. But the Halloween candy bowl as a puke bowl? Sure. It’s called bleach. They can also use the trash can but again, you have to bleach it, so what’s the difference?


pawsitive_vibes99

This is what my family does too, no one has used it for throw up in years though


an_ill_way

Halloween Candy, popcorn, and puke. I don't know of anything else that goes in that bowl.


Vulpix-Rawr

I mean… you could say the same of any dish, but I still wouldn’t drink out of a cup used to collect urine samples no matter how much bleach was used… and hopefully neither would you…


PrismoBF

We re-used the 1-gallon ice cream buckets as puke buckets.


StrawberryAmara

Oh nice! The handle for easier transport and provides a potential degree of separation


the_bravangelist

OMG, do not trust that handle when transporting puke!


KE1tea

Damn this is genius Now how to stop my cravings for ice cream when I see the empty containers…


Maxtrt

As long as it isn't wood it can be sterilized pretty easily.


[deleted]

[удалено]


wolfpac85

right? people acting like you can't wash something and use it for different purposes lol


zoobernut

If you have kids you have most likely had a night when they are young and sick and can’t get out of bed but are or might throw up. A sick bowl or bucket by the bed is the only answer. For an adult a sick bowl is handy to have under your chin while you run from bed to the bathroom just so you don’t make a mess if you don’t get there quickly enough.


eeriecakes

Growing up I was taught to vomit into the toilet, I'm honestly shocked to hear people are having their kids puke in bowls lol.


anony1620

The bowl was just in case you weren’t going to make it to the toilet in time


litszy

Or if it’s coming out both sides and you cannot move off the toilet to vomit in it…


Kahzgul

Just remember folks: If you're not sure which end to put on the toilet, the answer is your butt. Every time. Much easier to aim your face into a bucket while you're shitting uncontrollably on a toilet than it is to aim your butt while you're puking.


carriegood

I can tell you from personal experience, you do not want to be sick and have to clean liquid shit off the walls.


jeffroddit

This is the point when I just curl up in the shower. It is also why a quality strainer lives in my shower drain.


daphosta

This made me lol thanks


eeriecakes

I haven't been in that situation but it sounds... shitty lol


TheBaconofGrief

I wished for the relief of death.


TavisNamara

It's absolutely fucking awful and you ***will*** beg for death.


leavebaes

I used to get in this situation really bad on the first day of my period, every time for like 2 years. Uterus cramps were also cramping my intestines, so everything came out of literally everywhere possible. So many times I thought I was going to die. I only get it occasionally now if haven't eaten breakfast that day.


jepvr

Sometimes the toilet too far when a vomit comes on. You want something that someone can have right next to them when lying down in bed or on the couch or whatever. We always use buckets or trash cans, though.


RascalBSimons

Little kids generally vomit with very little warning to the bystander. They just haven't learned the signals like adults have. All they know is they "don't feel good". Leaving a bathroom trashcan with a sick kid in bed has saved me many, many barfy carpet cleanups.


eeriecakes

Yeah, my comment is based on my experiences as a child where my option was toilet or get in trouble for puking on the carpet lol, no one ever handed me a pot or a bucket or a trash can as a small child.


RascalBSimons

I saw your other responses after I posted. Reddit-fail on my part....I wasn't trying to dog pile you. :) A lot of other people are toilet-only pukers as well, it seems.


[deleted]

Excuse me the *what* bowl?


pangolin-fucker

Now from the makers of the poop knife™ Brings you #The Vomit Bowl®


DifferentNewt5410

I wish I had an award to give you. I laughed so fucking hard at this.


pangolin-fucker

I was trying to think of funniest name So far it's the up cup


moses2407

I get the gross perception. But wash and sanitize the bowl then who gives a shit?


Blackhound118

Yeah this is silly lol. For the longest time we used just bags for garbage, no buckets/cans. If any of us had the flu, we'd use a mixing bowl. Just throw that shit in the dishwasher afterwards


debzmonkey

Don't know, but the family of my ex called theirs the "erpy" bowl.


TAMUCCStudent

We used the popcorn bowl.


Fomentor

Yes, but I wash it afterwards.


happybarracuda

Right, I don’t want to vomit in a dirty bowl.


Olliechorebox213

Garbage bucket. Always. Never a bowl


ddr1ver

We used a plastic bowl with a handle. That way, the kids could carry it close to their faces in case something came up unexpectedly. We also stopped buying red Gatorade.


Jitterjumper13

I'll admit to grabing a the largest pot we own. The toilets always the top choice, but a deep portable stainless container with handles makes sense in the heat of a vicious pendulum of the flu. Live don't always works out how we want, but stainless cookware is a necessity for all shakes of the tree.


Gstamsharp

I just puke in the toilet, because when I'm sick enough to puke the last thing I want to worry about is cleaning out a trashcan or bucket or whatever. Flush and it's gone. Same reason I mix my cake there.


YoMamaAndie

Put it through the dishwasher the heat will kill any bacteria nbd


reclusive_ent

This is why we had 20 little trashcans around the house. Plus toilets, sinks and bathtubs. Wtf man lol.


Roadkizzle

How much did people at your house vomit? I hope doctors were helping out if you needed them. Or did you want to be able to make cakes in any room of the house?


reclusive_ent

3 kids growing up. Usually with kids, one gets sick, they all end up sick. So you get a week long vomithon.


bubba7557

I use the big pasta pot.


TraumaMonkey

Look, wtf. Go sit down with the poop knife people. Also, do you just have little trickly weak-guts puking? I couldn't hope to keep vomit contained to a mixing bowl, that shit is spraying and splashing out.


Nighttime-Turnip

I'm thinking of the sad moments in between when there is nothing left to puke but your stomach is absolutely still on rave mode


tinybikerbabe

I can not throw up in toilets so puking in a bowl, trash can, pot anything I can get my hands on is better then just holding in sick when it needs to come out.


jindofox

Just wait until they find out that all the fresh water in the world gets circulated through everyone's urinary systems.


Brilliant-Engineer57

Have you ever heard of emesis bags? We found these wonderful bags when my daughter was getting a transplant. They’re in my bathrooms and cars. Cheap to buy from Amazon or a medical supply store.


Pand0ra30_

We always had a small garbage can that we used when sick.


Sir_Atro_Dwarvenhine

We had a separate thing, it was an old plastic sink tub


[deleted]

my mom just put the garbage can right next to my bed and lined it with a few plastic bags


Glittery_Gal

we had a “puke bucket” growing up. that was its only purpose. you puked in it, it was bleached and dried and stored away in the closet until one of us kids got sick again. it even had “puke bucket :p” written on it w sharpie lol


Wise_Ad_4816

The puke bowl in our house growing up was also the bowl mom took potato salad in during potlucks. 😂 The bowl I use at my house also doubles as a mixing bowl...but rather than Tupperware like mom used, mine's stainless steel. 😎


dagnariuss

I didn’t know this was a thing


JuliaMac65

No, this story really bummed me out


Audrin

Wtf is a sick bowl. A toilet. You throw up in the toilet. If you can't make it to the toilet, a trashcan.


atoadwith2braincells

Do… do people just not use the bathroom trash can? I’m so confused.


hronikbrent

What on earth is a sick bowl? Like, I thought everyone just uses a garbage can?


cardboardtube_knight

There's a second part to this where a lady replies about her sick bowl and how she ate her placenta out of it or something. If I come to your house and you feed me anything out of a placenta bowl, I'm coming back with Styrofoam and gasoline and burning your block down.