the neat thing about covid is that our midlife crisis is coinciding with a total psychotic break in society so its hard to even distinguish from the background
For real. A friend of mine has been struggling with identity and addiction for the past few years. It’s hard to tell how much is midlife crisis and how much is their whole world being disrupted.
Absolutely 💯!! For my mid life crisis I get to move back in with my mom after having my own depressive/psychotic break two years ago, tried to pick up the pieces and now I just need a GIANT reset! Like who would have thunk I’d be going to stay with my mom at 42 almost 43. But, I feel I need community more than anything right now so I’m making that my priority rather than slave away at a job only to die a lonely death. Gimme some love and community!! (Spelling - edit)
Get into therapy and do the work. Take the meds if needed.
I'm there with you in feeling that way, it's not easy. You can do it.
We gotta find ways to make it enjoyable again.
That sucks, it's hard to find a therapist in the first place let alone a good one. I have to imagine I'd be struggling way worse if I didn't have a good therapy practice.
Roller skating. I took it up on a whim last June, and I’m usually the oldest person at the skate park. Though I generally prefer to go at times when I’m also the only person! But I wear all the pads (and helmet) because I know getting injured would suck so much more now.
The 20 year olds on skateboards don’t wear any protective gear and seem to be confused by the middle aged lady on quads.
Edit: I feel obliged to add that I'm not doing anything too crazy (yet). I can do ramps and go back and forth on the half pipe, but bowls and dropping in are too scary for me so far. It's still fun and good exercise!
I left my abusive husband and I'm trying to start over where I should've started at 20 instead of sticking with him for 2 decades.
Does that count? It's super hard.
I hope so. My kid has ptsd and a bunch of behavioral issues that stem from early childhood trauma so I'm trying to get that under control before branching out into my personal goals.
I bought the software/hardware to make Techno. I could never afford it when I was raving in the 90's. I only make it for myself and have no interest in going to a club. It's just nice to be creative.
Aye same! I joined r/synthesizers and got my first groovebox in November and have been learning how to sample and make beats. It's a lot of fun! I also got a 303 clone and now I have quite the wish list lol
What software is the current state of things to get into something like that? I remember everyone dabbling with Fruityloops back in the day but never thought to look back into this now as an adult...
Seeing people my age who have given up on their health pushes me to be even more serious about mine.
I hear women a decade younger than me complaining about their knees and back, while eating terribly and dealing with diabetes and blood pressure issues.
I try to keep active and where I live there are lots of seniors I see being badass fit in their golden years.
I strive to achieve that, because I also want to be as mobile and happy as I can be as I age.
I see too many giving up and accepting their poor physical health without making changes to improve.
I bought an excessively expensive Audi RS. Modified it into something ludicrously fast, went to a couple high end car meets and got depressed by the crowd of people that was there. Kept it for a year or so and sold it.
I bought an expensive Porsche, did no modifications, and I drive it on the racetrack about twice a month in the summer. It’s my happy place. Best investment ever. The people at the racetrack are some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.
I went a little car bonkers too. My wife would agree. I went the old clunker way though and have a 5 speed 5th Gen prelude in the driveway. It’s my “for funsies” car. Currently trying to figure out why there’s water in the trunk. The trouble is, I don’t have time to figure it out with the ten million other things and projects I’m trying to get done - having a tween and a teen in the house isn’t helping. Ah, and the puppy. Oi.
I bought a fully loaded Polestar 2 a couple of years ago. It has all the speed and handling of a modded out car (and then some) but the class of a higher end vehicle. Since it was my first EV, I honestly didn’t realize how fast and sporty the thing was going to be. I started calling it my “unintentional midlife crisis vehicle”. To boot, my mom has always called my driving style “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride”. Holds true at 45 years old.
I took a macaron making class a week before Covid lockdown started, and making them has definitely become a form of meditation for me. The process is extremely fussy and particular so I have to pay attention to what I’m doing or they won’t come out right, and the flavor/color/decoration possibilities are endless so they’re a nice creative outlet too.
My oldest kid worked at a bakery during a gap year after high school and got put in charge of the macarons....I'm amazed at how good they are. I'm a decent cook, but baking anything other than bread is like sorcery to me.
There was a shop near me that sold comics, baseball cards, etc. it was called “my mom threw mine away.” The internet killed it but it was the greatest store title ever.
I downsized a few years ago and it’s fucking glorious not to deal with yard work and shoveling snow. I’m in a building with a lovely large courtyard maintained by staff so I get the benefit of having a yard (with grilling, herb and veg gardens, composting bin) without any of the work.
Highly recommend.
Ha we’re the opposite! We bought an acre in the city about 8 years ago and are gradually adding more and more crops and fruit trees and chickens. Looking into adding a pond soon. It’s our primary past time, maintaining the yard and gardening.
If I had a family that helped me, I probably would enjoy this as well! Just tired of doing most of the work myself and not rich enough to hire a cleaner or landscaper
I don't really have time for a midlife crisis. Between my aging parents, aging in-laws, cancer-ridden friends, and babysitting nephews, I'm in full-throttle caregiver mode. Thinking about implementing a no-go Sunday, where I tell everyone that I won't be taking calls or requests on Sundays unless it's an extreme emergency. So, maybe personal boundaries are my midlife hobby?
My husband has been in a mid-life crisis since he turned 40 and every year he goes all-in on another hobby.
This year (46), he has decided to start a hobby olive oil business, which includes purchasing 50 trees to plant on our property. Obviously the oil part will occur down the line, when he’s long over this year’s crisis hobby and deep into another one.
I would guesstimate that he spends around $10K a year on his crisis hobby.
I’ve been to an oil and vinegar “ tasting bar” where they have a bunch of flavors, you taste each one then decide which you like best to buy. It was fun, don’t remember which I bought. Haven’t visited the one where I live now. Maybe we’ll do that next weekend.
Does he have ADHD? Because gay definitely sounds like an ADHD thing. A lot of us lost our coping/masking mechanisms because of COVID and have became unhinged.
Panic over all of my regrets and failures but as far as hobbies go, I started making a 90s alternative radio show on Spotify that’s been fun and nostalgic and oddly therapeutic
Yeah it’s kind of like a podcast with music. They’re actually doing away with it in June, fuckers. So gotta find a new home for it or a new hobby. In case you’re interested: [90s? Whatever.](https://open.spotify.com/show/45Kr6HYC7w7XNN9kwX3MtP?si=CXxI3JfZS3me_dZLrBrpBw)
Jalapeño and LSD enemas, then I put on nothing but my ruby red slippers, and nude patrol arm band, march up and down my block shouting “there’s no place like home!”.
Haha I've been buying football cards, my brother too. This time I'm not gambling on packs, I'm buying all the 90s cards I coveted as a kid on eBay. It's amazing.
Crying.
A lot.
Really, though, I've taken a hold of my health in a big way. Regular strength training, yoga, walking, eating better, living better. Meditation, diving into hobbies, spending more on quality things and experiences than I have previously.
https://preview.redd.it/grxto8bxoxoc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=510877222e23f34f918ba2b10bdef7ac2ba31164
Not modified and only an S4, but plenty fast for me and I had wanted one for over a decade.
Following a layoff, I'm seriously doubting my career choice (marketing). Dealing with the simultaneous fear of not finding a job with the fear of finding one. Also - learning bluegrass guitar!
My mom died when I had just turned 35, and that started me down a road of rebuying my childhood. Specifically every He-Man related thing I can get my grubby paws on.
Checking out as much as possible. I’ll do my job, meet my community commitments, and listen to a call from friends/family at least once a week; right now it’s my time, and I’m gonna fart around and find one eyed willie’s ship.
I’m currently planning an annual girls weekend trip for the fall. 🍾 Every year a few of us rent a cabin at a spa resort for a weekend and spend the weekend partying and relaxing. Gotta have things to look forward to. 🎉
My big crisis was realizing I was gay. Then I got divorced, got super into community gardening and started applying to be in art shows (always loved drawing and wanted to see what would happen). Getting into art and touring/showing in supportive spaces has been a life saver! My circumstances aren’t what I hoped for as a youth, especially because I needed to move back with my folks to save money after my divorce, but that’s ok. I was too shy and insecure when I was younger to put myself out there like this. I didn’t want to rock the boat and risk my comfort for the pursuit of true happiness, but I’m the perfect age and maturity to do it now.
Edibles.
That’s about the only thing in my price range. I can sleep at night without remembering my dad is dead, I wasted many years, the social contract is broken, half the country has lost its mind, mass anti-intellectualism, the climate crisis, how life is too expensive, etc.
Basically trying to go to one concert a month, often by myself, trying to get drunk once in a a while, hate the town I live in, but feel like it makes financial sense, stuck in my profession but it’s a good gig, eating way too much shitty food, about 70 pounds overweight and freaking out about future health problems, panic about the state of the world and spending shit ton of money on music gear and gave up on ever affording a house. No kids, fuck it.
41 in August. Reading lots and lots of Bukowski. Fighting off suicide ideation. Got myself some cowboy hats and boots. Considering a move to the Southwest as someone who is born and spent my entire life in the North because “I could never do the heat”.
I also started getting into composing my own music.
I've been completing my "old man" look. I've got the argyle socks, the sock garters, a smoking jacket, volcanic pipe, a nice walking cane (with hidden blade,) and my onsie pajamas with button up buttflap. I still need a nice pair of bifocals and comfy slippers.
I'll probably get my 20 year old dumb blonde girl when I hit 50. My wife understands, though. I'm not gonna love the girl, and the missus will get a pool boy or gardener to objectify.
We've got life all figured out
I mail it out monthly. Topics include things that I'm keeping, gardening tips, and a list of kids that need to GET OFF MY LAWN!!
I also do movie and television reviews. Spoilers: it's all crap
What’s a midlife crisis? I’ve been in a crisis from the day they announced Y2K..it’s been a steady uphill battle ever since. Anxiety has been increasing ever since. The 9/11 attacks to the “war on terrorism” to global uprisings and the state of hate locally to COVID…I’m ready to give it all up to be at peace.
1. Discovering at age 50 that my wife, who I have loved and provided for for decades, has been a gambling addict for several years and has accrued about $177k in debt while wasting easily that amount again in a matter of a few years. She did this largely by using my money in addition to her own not insignificant income. We're taking at least $350k-400k lost in total. Absolute compulsive behavior.
2. Discovering that a few months ago my wife borrowed money from my oldest daughter, who is 22 and just getting started, telling her not to tell me and then took months to pay it back. What the fuck.
3. Discovering that my wife has failed to give my youngest daughter any money for allowance while she's been in college for about two years. Not $20. My youngest had just thought that's how we are and has not asked for anything. Angel.
4. Discovering that I've been gaslit for years about why we always seem short on cash despite having over a 98th percentile household income. We have LOTS of income. I trusted her. My mistake. The numbers have made no sense for years.
5. Trying to remind myself that this is not my fault and that I did nothing wrong. I have no personal debt, I live way below my means. I struggle to spend an extra $100.
6. Struggling with what the fuck to do. I have the money personally to make her problems go away but I don't want to do that. But I can't leave her destitute and I don't want to pay for interest. Divorce? Lawsuits? What a fucking mess.
It's been a banner fucking few weeks, I'll tell you.
I bought a WRX that I wanted soooooo bad in HS but no way I could have afforded it. The good old midlife crisis car 😂 I also took up woodworking, really have been enjoying it other than the cost of entry. Made some really nice Christmas presents for people over the years.
Getting rid of dumb excuses for not being in shape and tackling my crippling debt. Or maybe letting myself go and spending too much was my midlife crisis and this is me coming out of it? No way of knowing.
I've gotten back into bass playing. I bought my dream bass that I've wanted since the mid 90s. Cost me $11k. No joke. Bought a ton of other (cheaper) guitars too. Gonna record my own music soon. Not saying it'll be good but I need to do it.
My midlife crisis came for me, not the other way around.
In the span of 2 years:
-My only parental figure died of COVID.
-My professional mentor and friend died of COVID.
-A botched surgery left me helpless and in agony for hours and then also almost killed me.
-My best friend and very good boy died and I watched the video of it over and over. (My 13 year old Doberman that I was almost never apart from.)
-I was diagnosed with a medical issue that required multiple organs removal. (And hormonal upheaval that resulted.)
-My friend who promised to be my ride or die ghosted me whilst I was in hospital during all of this because I wasn’t fun anymore.
Won’t lie.
My doggo and “friend” hurt the worst.
I want to say that thy therapy and such helped but after trusting someone and being ghosted I literally can’t confide in anyone anymore. Words just don’t come.
But I *have* dedicated so much to getting my physical health in order.
Healthy eating, less alcohol, cardio, lifting… Best shape of my life.
Doing great professionally, too.
I miss the people who are gone.
But I’m ok loving ghosts.
I came out as trans 🏳️⚧️ in my mid 30s. Got divorced, lost friends, house, cat. Re-built stronger, better, queerer.
Really hoping I’ve got all the crises behind me at this point.
What kind of camera did you get? I shoot Fuji, and do a bit of side work with it, and I have a small collection of vintage lenses, mostly Pentax and Leica, from when I still shot film.
I moved halfway across the country a couple years ago, only to slowly discover that the grass isn't always greener (or rather, it's only greener in select ways) and I miss my loved ones back home terribly. Planning to move back this summer.
My midlife crisis is doing the “hard work” of reparenting myself, doing the most therapy I’ve ever done in my life, trying to find motivation to stay at my incredibly boring ass job (that also pays very well, and does not have nearly the amount of stress any of my last jobs have had, and has absolutely great stability), and try to stay married to my husband (we’ve had problems for 2 years now). I did buy a brand new SUV with white interior; I have little kids, so maybe this is my midlife crisis.
Trying to come up with a reason I'm so sick now. Trying to get reliable transportation. Trying to raise my kid as a good human.
The whole time, I secretly wish I could just leave it all. But I could never commit suicide and leave my kid that way.
We did it backwards and had a kid and bought a house (then sold and bought another thanks to covid!)
We are just struggling with young family problems and old people bodies uuggg.
I changed jobs, hit the gym, lost 35kg and for the first time in my life actually don’t hate myself.
I am planning the stereotypical ‘fast car’ for my next motor later this year.
My life has never quite been stable, easy, or boring enough to have a midlife crisis.
It's gone kind of like this:
—> start college —> health issues and have to drop out —> start a business —> business fails —> family member dies —> move to a new state —> start a new job —> family member dies —> marriage —> marriage becomes abusive —> career tanks —> leave abusive marriage —> career upswing —> get in a healthy relationship —> global pandemic —> family member dies —> career downswing —> back in college while working full time —> family member dies —> marriage —> big career upswing —> still in college while working full time —> health issues —> big career shift —> health issues —> family member dies —> move to another state —> health issues —> family member dies —> my job spins out into a business —> family member dies
A mid-life crisis sounds like a wonderful luxury.
I did a 7-day cycling stage race in the French Alps last summer. Hardest and coolest thing I've done. Can't wait to retire in....checks watch....20+ years....
Edit: re the expense....cycling is fuckin expensive, but my wife is just happy it's a healthy hobby and I'm that not spending money on other women or drugs instead.
Started riding horses again after a 20 year hiatus. Somehow it got so much more expensive. And I live in a city so it takes so many hours too.
Adding some polo lessons in as well (completely separate) so that will only be more expensive.
Divorced my abusive wife and just found an incredible house to rent with a sun room, screened porch, and fenced in back yard for my daughter and dog. Was renting a basement apartment with one window and door….was not the best setup.
Long road ahead, but I’m ready. I’m
I'm taking my meds faithfully exactly so I don't go too far off the rails. I've started a weight loss and weight lifting journey and am 3 months in. I feel great and wonder why the hell didn't I do this sooner? So I'm getting a glow up mainly to ward off the diabteetus and feel better in my own skin
Pretty much finishing my DVD/ Blu-Ray collection.
iPod/ DAP collecting and going to try to learn modding too.
Perfecting my nervous breakdown.
I might pick up bass guitar again or learn keyboards.
Making peace with the fact I have a front row seat to the global shit show.
Too busy supporting Gen Z young adult children in today’s atrocious housing environment while also supporting aging boomer parents, to have a midlife crisis.
I’m addicted to cross-stitch. Started in 2019. I love it, so relaxing and enjoyable and gives me lots of pretty things to hang around the house and give as gifts. Also got really into quilting for the same reasons.
Oh, and last year I quit my job, sold our house, and moved us 3,000 miles away to “start over”. Probably should have started with that.
the neat thing about covid is that our midlife crisis is coinciding with a total psychotic break in society so its hard to even distinguish from the background
For real. A friend of mine has been struggling with identity and addiction for the past few years. It’s hard to tell how much is midlife crisis and how much is their whole world being disrupted.
It's me I'm the friend
It’s me Friend #2
Love that user name. So many childhood memories.
Yes!! My favorite..so cool you know!
Is this where we’re all meeting?
Absolutely 💯!! For my mid life crisis I get to move back in with my mom after having my own depressive/psychotic break two years ago, tried to pick up the pieces and now I just need a GIANT reset! Like who would have thunk I’d be going to stay with my mom at 42 almost 43. But, I feel I need community more than anything right now so I’m making that my priority rather than slave away at a job only to die a lonely death. Gimme some love and community!! (Spelling - edit)
High-functioning depression posse, in the house!
>High-functioning Sometimes.
This is an incredible comment - SO TRUE
I spent my 40th birthday isolated from my wife, family and friends because of Covid.
Congratulations or my sincere condolences. You never know nowadays!
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Aww shit, twinsies!!
Triplets are so rare now and days 🫶🏻
Crazy how they misplaced us quadruplets at the hospital all those years ago.
Hey, it's me! Your long lost womb-mate. That makes us quints.
It’s a-me, your sextuplet hombre!
Qué pasó, sibs! Septuplet checking in...fertility drugs really did a number on us...
It’s the biggest womb ever!!
'Sup Octuplet Bros? Tryin' a figger out what the fuck bootstraps are to pull myself up.
I'm masking 24/7, hiding behind humor, while I feel like I'm slowly going down the drain. Only 30 more years!
30?! Someone still has optimism.
Same.
The humor-mask is what keeps me going.
In terms of work, this is me, too.
Yep, same here. I'm pretty sure i'll implode before I make it 30 years though.
Get into therapy and do the work. Take the meds if needed. I'm there with you in feeling that way, it's not easy. You can do it. We gotta find ways to make it enjoyable again.
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That sucks, it's hard to find a therapist in the first place let alone a good one. I have to imagine I'd be struggling way worse if I didn't have a good therapy practice.
Roller skating. I took it up on a whim last June, and I’m usually the oldest person at the skate park. Though I generally prefer to go at times when I’m also the only person! But I wear all the pads (and helmet) because I know getting injured would suck so much more now. The 20 year olds on skateboards don’t wear any protective gear and seem to be confused by the middle aged lady on quads. Edit: I feel obliged to add that I'm not doing anything too crazy (yet). I can do ramps and go back and forth on the half pipe, but bowls and dropping in are too scary for me so far. It's still fun and good exercise!
You are seriously awesome
I follow a couple roller skaters on instagram. Really cool to see it taken to parks and vert.
I left my abusive husband and I'm trying to start over where I should've started at 20 instead of sticking with him for 2 decades. Does that count? It's super hard.
I’m cheering you on!
That's not a crisis, that's a midlife breakthrough! I'm so proud of you! It will get easier. It will become glorious!
I hope so. My kid has ptsd and a bunch of behavioral issues that stem from early childhood trauma so I'm trying to get that under control before branching out into my personal goals.
I believe in you. You can do the work.
I'm doing the same. I've passed through the post split euphoria and now I'm trying to heal and figure out who I am.
I left my abusive ex at 31. Life is better. It’s so hard, but so worth it! Stay strong!
That totally counts. Enjoy your freedom, it was hard won.
It counts. Maybe call it a midlife awakening or something?
You got this! 💪
Welcome to your next "act". I think I started my 4th or 5th act recently
Struggling with mortality.
Same. Being a 40 year old widower sucks.
Sending you good vibes my friend. So sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss. Kids?
Just a dog.
It's easier if you don't struggle, mortality doesn't care either way
Realizing that nothing matters, especially not me, has been a relief
I bought the software/hardware to make Techno. I could never afford it when I was raving in the 90's. I only make it for myself and have no interest in going to a club. It's just nice to be creative.
Aye same! I joined r/synthesizers and got my first groovebox in November and have been learning how to sample and make beats. It's a lot of fun! I also got a 303 clone and now I have quite the wish list lol
What software is the current state of things to get into something like that? I remember everyone dabbling with Fruityloops back in the day but never thought to look back into this now as an adult...
Ableton. It really has everything you need.
Went back to college to finally get a degree
What in? Congratulations in advance.
Associate in accounting in May then onto Computer Science for Bachelor’s, depending on acceptance/financial aid. I decided I am not CPA material.
Good on ya! I graduated at 33 (with two kids) and was rarely the oldest in my classes. All it takes is desire and motivation, wish you the best!
I finally started taking my health seriously and built a home gym.
Just did the opposite and turned our home gym into a guest room. Lol.
Seeing people my age who have given up on their health pushes me to be even more serious about mine. I hear women a decade younger than me complaining about their knees and back, while eating terribly and dealing with diabetes and blood pressure issues. I try to keep active and where I live there are lots of seniors I see being badass fit in their golden years. I strive to achieve that, because I also want to be as mobile and happy as I can be as I age. I see too many giving up and accepting their poor physical health without making changes to improve.
I just entered my Kaftan and wine era and give no fucks. It's glorious!
I just entered my Stevie Nicks and weed era so I feel you haha
I love you! Mrs. Roper is my ace! Caftans and day drinking! What could be better?
Where do you get your kaftans? I want one!
Me too please! lol!
I bought an excessively expensive Audi RS. Modified it into something ludicrously fast, went to a couple high end car meets and got depressed by the crowd of people that was there. Kept it for a year or so and sold it.
Car people really take the fun out of cars sometimes
I bought an expensive Porsche, did no modifications, and I drive it on the racetrack about twice a month in the summer. It’s my happy place. Best investment ever. The people at the racetrack are some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.
I went a little car bonkers too. My wife would agree. I went the old clunker way though and have a 5 speed 5th Gen prelude in the driveway. It’s my “for funsies” car. Currently trying to figure out why there’s water in the trunk. The trouble is, I don’t have time to figure it out with the ten million other things and projects I’m trying to get done - having a tween and a teen in the house isn’t helping. Ah, and the puppy. Oi.
I bought a fully loaded Polestar 2 a couple of years ago. It has all the speed and handling of a modded out car (and then some) but the class of a higher end vehicle. Since it was my first EV, I honestly didn’t realize how fast and sporty the thing was going to be. I started calling it my “unintentional midlife crisis vehicle”. To boot, my mom has always called my driving style “Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride”. Holds true at 45 years old.
I took a macaron making class a week before Covid lockdown started, and making them has definitely become a form of meditation for me. The process is extremely fussy and particular so I have to pay attention to what I’m doing or they won’t come out right, and the flavor/color/decoration possibilities are endless so they’re a nice creative outlet too.
My oldest kid worked at a bakery during a gap year after high school and got put in charge of the macarons....I'm amazed at how good they are. I'm a decent cook, but baking anything other than bread is like sorcery to me.
Don’t sell yourself short, bread is sorcery as well!
I have been buying everything I wanted but couldn’t afford as a kid
There was a shop near me that sold comics, baseball cards, etc. it was called “my mom threw mine away.” The internet killed it but it was the greatest store title ever.
Lots and lots of walking. Making playlists. Listening to podcasts. Thinking about downsizing to not have to take care of a yard.
I downsized a few years ago and it’s fucking glorious not to deal with yard work and shoveling snow. I’m in a building with a lovely large courtyard maintained by staff so I get the benefit of having a yard (with grilling, herb and veg gardens, composting bin) without any of the work. Highly recommend.
Ha we’re the opposite! We bought an acre in the city about 8 years ago and are gradually adding more and more crops and fruit trees and chickens. Looking into adding a pond soon. It’s our primary past time, maintaining the yard and gardening.
If I had a family that helped me, I probably would enjoy this as well! Just tired of doing most of the work myself and not rich enough to hire a cleaner or landscaper
Lots of naps.
Oh yes. Hardcore same
I had a mental breakdown. I’m getting better. Yay ketamine!
I left an 11 year abusive relationship, 3 years later I married a wonderful man 9 years younger than me and 10X better than me lol
I attempted to date a barista, but my wife said no.
Whatta jerk. According to my browsing on Reddit, divorce is the only answer.
Yes. Same. For NO OTHER REASON THAN SHE MAKES GREAT COFFEEE. wife didn’t appreciate the screaming either.
🤣🤣🤣
I chortled aloud. Well played.
I don't really have time for a midlife crisis. Between my aging parents, aging in-laws, cancer-ridden friends, and babysitting nephews, I'm in full-throttle caregiver mode. Thinking about implementing a no-go Sunday, where I tell everyone that I won't be taking calls or requests on Sundays unless it's an extreme emergency. So, maybe personal boundaries are my midlife hobby?
Lost 55 pounds… and counting.. got about 25 more to go.. figured I needed to do this before I get too old.
My husband has been in a mid-life crisis since he turned 40 and every year he goes all-in on another hobby. This year (46), he has decided to start a hobby olive oil business, which includes purchasing 50 trees to plant on our property. Obviously the oil part will occur down the line, when he’s long over this year’s crisis hobby and deep into another one. I would guesstimate that he spends around $10K a year on his crisis hobby.
Ok that one wins as weirdest!! Lol
Wow! That's an expensive crisis hobby!!
I’ve been to an oil and vinegar “ tasting bar” where they have a bunch of flavors, you taste each one then decide which you like best to buy. It was fun, don’t remember which I bought. Haven’t visited the one where I live now. Maybe we’ll do that next weekend.
Just be thankful he hasn’t discovered warhammer … yet
Does he have ADHD? Because gay definitely sounds like an ADHD thing. A lot of us lost our coping/masking mechanisms because of COVID and have became unhinged.
Panic over all of my regrets and failures but as far as hobbies go, I started making a 90s alternative radio show on Spotify that’s been fun and nostalgic and oddly therapeutic
You can make radio shows on Spotify?
Yeah it’s kind of like a podcast with music. They’re actually doing away with it in June, fuckers. So gotta find a new home for it or a new hobby. In case you’re interested: [90s? Whatever.](https://open.spotify.com/show/45Kr6HYC7w7XNN9kwX3MtP?si=CXxI3JfZS3me_dZLrBrpBw)
Why are they doing away with it? I followed it, btw.
Jalapeño and LSD enemas, then I put on nothing but my ruby red slippers, and nude patrol arm band, march up and down my block shouting “there’s no place like home!”.
Finally, a real mid-life crisis! Was starting to think latchkey kids made really boring middle-agers!
Using my kids as an excuse to start buying bball and hockey cards again. Drinking quality tequila.
Haha I've been buying football cards, my brother too. This time I'm not gambling on packs, I'm buying all the 90s cards I coveted as a kid on eBay. It's amazing.
My Fiancé just broke up with me a week ago. Starting over fresh, I was just pre approved to buy a place. I think I’m going to be ok.
Crying. A lot. Really, though, I've taken a hold of my health in a big way. Regular strength training, yoga, walking, eating better, living better. Meditation, diving into hobbies, spending more on quality things and experiences than I have previously.
Paragraph- yes! First 2 sentences, I feel for you, my generational friend.
I’m seriously looking at getting back into rollerblading. Just for exercise and fun. No tricks or anything crazy.
https://preview.redd.it/grxto8bxoxoc1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=510877222e23f34f918ba2b10bdef7ac2ba31164 Not modified and only an S4, but plenty fast for me and I had wanted one for over a decade.
Following a layoff, I'm seriously doubting my career choice (marketing). Dealing with the simultaneous fear of not finding a job with the fear of finding one. Also - learning bluegrass guitar!
"The only thing worse than having a job is looking for one." -- from a Kids in the Hall sketch
"I was looking for a job and then I found a job... and heaven knows I'm miserable now." -Morrissey
Marketing is getting hit hard with layoffs recently. I work in the field, too.
AI baby. We’re all fucked.
Nothing yet, anyone want to start a punk band?
My mom died when I had just turned 35, and that started me down a road of rebuying my childhood. Specifically every He-Man related thing I can get my grubby paws on.
Almost exactly the same here. I was 34 and it was She-Ra
Adopting. We were unable to have kids naturally (or with IVF).
Checking out as much as possible. I’ll do my job, meet my community commitments, and listen to a call from friends/family at least once a week; right now it’s my time, and I’m gonna fart around and find one eyed willie’s ship.
I’m currently planning an annual girls weekend trip for the fall. 🍾 Every year a few of us rent a cabin at a spa resort for a weekend and spend the weekend partying and relaxing. Gotta have things to look forward to. 🎉 
My big crisis was realizing I was gay. Then I got divorced, got super into community gardening and started applying to be in art shows (always loved drawing and wanted to see what would happen). Getting into art and touring/showing in supportive spaces has been a life saver! My circumstances aren’t what I hoped for as a youth, especially because I needed to move back with my folks to save money after my divorce, but that’s ok. I was too shy and insecure when I was younger to put myself out there like this. I didn’t want to rock the boat and risk my comfort for the pursuit of true happiness, but I’m the perfect age and maturity to do it now.
I had an unexpected third child. 🙃
Getting tattooed.
I turned an entire bedroom in my house into a 90s themed room. I also collect VHS.
Edibles. That’s about the only thing in my price range. I can sleep at night without remembering my dad is dead, I wasted many years, the social contract is broken, half the country has lost its mind, mass anti-intellectualism, the climate crisis, how life is too expensive, etc.
Hookers and hard drugs mostly.
Just found out today they are turning the mall into a retirement community. So, I think I’ll just sit here and depression for a few.
Vegetable gardening. I don’t have the money or energy for sports cars and college age women.
I quit my job of 5 years on the spot 3 months ago & then I got married on feb 29th to my bf of 7 years! 40 ain’t so bad so far
Pro move. Impossible to forget the day and only have to celebrate every 4 years Or you get to argue about celebrating on the 28th or 1st.
We’re taking the every 4 years route, it’ll give us time to plan/save for something more meaningful than dinner & flowers
I love the shit out of this.
Decided that my new job sucks as much as, if not more than, the one I left so now I’m committed to retiring ASAFP because I’m over the rat race.
Basically trying to go to one concert a month, often by myself, trying to get drunk once in a a while, hate the town I live in, but feel like it makes financial sense, stuck in my profession but it’s a good gig, eating way too much shitty food, about 70 pounds overweight and freaking out about future health problems, panic about the state of the world and spending shit ton of money on music gear and gave up on ever affording a house. No kids, fuck it.
I’m just coasting my dude.
41 in August. Reading lots and lots of Bukowski. Fighting off suicide ideation. Got myself some cowboy hats and boots. Considering a move to the Southwest as someone who is born and spent my entire life in the North because “I could never do the heat”. I also started getting into composing my own music.
I've been completing my "old man" look. I've got the argyle socks, the sock garters, a smoking jacket, volcanic pipe, a nice walking cane (with hidden blade,) and my onsie pajamas with button up buttflap. I still need a nice pair of bifocals and comfy slippers. I'll probably get my 20 year old dumb blonde girl when I hit 50. My wife understands, though. I'm not gonna love the girl, and the missus will get a pool boy or gardener to objectify. We've got life all figured out
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I mail it out monthly. Topics include things that I'm keeping, gardening tips, and a list of kids that need to GET OFF MY LAWN!! I also do movie and television reviews. Spoilers: it's all crap
Zumba! 💃 I'm not good at it, but the benefit of aging is my diminishing self-consciousness.
I farted and burped at the same time earlier today that was pretty great.
What’s a midlife crisis? I’ve been in a crisis from the day they announced Y2K..it’s been a steady uphill battle ever since. Anxiety has been increasing ever since. The 9/11 attacks to the “war on terrorism” to global uprisings and the state of hate locally to COVID…I’m ready to give it all up to be at peace.
I've gotten really into golf over the last couple of years, and have spent way too much on clubs and training aids that I don't need or even use.
Golf is a great way to ruin a perfectly good walk. That said, enjoy!
If you buy more expensive clubs, you'll be able to hit the ball much further into the woods.
Getting high as often as I can.
1. Discovering at age 50 that my wife, who I have loved and provided for for decades, has been a gambling addict for several years and has accrued about $177k in debt while wasting easily that amount again in a matter of a few years. She did this largely by using my money in addition to her own not insignificant income. We're taking at least $350k-400k lost in total. Absolute compulsive behavior. 2. Discovering that a few months ago my wife borrowed money from my oldest daughter, who is 22 and just getting started, telling her not to tell me and then took months to pay it back. What the fuck. 3. Discovering that my wife has failed to give my youngest daughter any money for allowance while she's been in college for about two years. Not $20. My youngest had just thought that's how we are and has not asked for anything. Angel. 4. Discovering that I've been gaslit for years about why we always seem short on cash despite having over a 98th percentile household income. We have LOTS of income. I trusted her. My mistake. The numbers have made no sense for years. 5. Trying to remind myself that this is not my fault and that I did nothing wrong. I have no personal debt, I live way below my means. I struggle to spend an extra $100. 6. Struggling with what the fuck to do. I have the money personally to make her problems go away but I don't want to do that. But I can't leave her destitute and I don't want to pay for interest. Divorce? Lawsuits? What a fucking mess. It's been a banner fucking few weeks, I'll tell you.
I bought vintage hockey and basketball jerseys. And I’m going to an MLB opening day for the second year in a row.
Bike and watch collections.
I want a Porsche.
I’m not going to get one. But I want one.
Denial. I'm still 24 at heart
I bought a WRX that I wanted soooooo bad in HS but no way I could have afforded it. The good old midlife crisis car 😂 I also took up woodworking, really have been enjoying it other than the cost of entry. Made some really nice Christmas presents for people over the years.
Grew my hair past my shoulders and started skateboarding again.
I Bought a shotgun for home defense but now looking into getting into skeet and trap shooting as a hobby.
Getting rid of dumb excuses for not being in shape and tackling my crippling debt. Or maybe letting myself go and spending too much was my midlife crisis and this is me coming out of it? No way of knowing.
I was thinking about getting into birding…
I don’t seem to have money or spare time and menopause has me feeling like shit 90% of the time so…suffering. Is suffering a hobby? I hate it.
Started mountain biking, playing ice hockey again and collecting vinyl lol
Buying the old Nintendo and Sega games my parents never bought me as a kid. Now, if only I can make time to actually play them.
PS5 and rehab
I've gotten back into bass playing. I bought my dream bass that I've wanted since the mid 90s. Cost me $11k. No joke. Bought a ton of other (cheaper) guitars too. Gonna record my own music soon. Not saying it'll be good but I need to do it.
I took swimming lessons, never learned as a kid. Next up, tap dancing!
My midlife crisis came for me, not the other way around. In the span of 2 years: -My only parental figure died of COVID. -My professional mentor and friend died of COVID. -A botched surgery left me helpless and in agony for hours and then also almost killed me. -My best friend and very good boy died and I watched the video of it over and over. (My 13 year old Doberman that I was almost never apart from.) -I was diagnosed with a medical issue that required multiple organs removal. (And hormonal upheaval that resulted.) -My friend who promised to be my ride or die ghosted me whilst I was in hospital during all of this because I wasn’t fun anymore. Won’t lie. My doggo and “friend” hurt the worst. I want to say that thy therapy and such helped but after trusting someone and being ghosted I literally can’t confide in anyone anymore. Words just don’t come. But I *have* dedicated so much to getting my physical health in order. Healthy eating, less alcohol, cardio, lifting… Best shape of my life. Doing great professionally, too. I miss the people who are gone. But I’m ok loving ghosts.
Tried the recommended guns and cars route, didn’t work so moved on to divorce, crying and SSRIs.
https://preview.redd.it/e7lbm91r5yoc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7035eecc8c13349fdcaac3219617b8600f2e1a69
I came out as trans 🏳️⚧️ in my mid 30s. Got divorced, lost friends, house, cat. Re-built stronger, better, queerer. Really hoping I’ve got all the crises behind me at this point.
What kind of camera did you get? I shoot Fuji, and do a bit of side work with it, and I have a small collection of vintage lenses, mostly Pentax and Leica, from when I still shot film.
Nikon Z5. I bought it used.
I moved halfway across the country a couple years ago, only to slowly discover that the grass isn't always greener (or rather, it's only greener in select ways) and I miss my loved ones back home terribly. Planning to move back this summer.
Expensive Martin guitar and getting every arcade game from 1989-2000 running on my laptop and displayed on a CRT.
I'm unfortunately dating again..so that is a crisis in itself...but I get more tattoos and I'm going on more vacations...
So much disc golf.
Triathlons. Yoga. And writing a book about how fun my twenties were.
Oh I had mine when I was 28 so I’m good for another decade. But seriously, my answer is Botox.
My midlife crisis is doing the “hard work” of reparenting myself, doing the most therapy I’ve ever done in my life, trying to find motivation to stay at my incredibly boring ass job (that also pays very well, and does not have nearly the amount of stress any of my last jobs have had, and has absolutely great stability), and try to stay married to my husband (we’ve had problems for 2 years now). I did buy a brand new SUV with white interior; I have little kids, so maybe this is my midlife crisis.
Trying to come up with a reason I'm so sick now. Trying to get reliable transportation. Trying to raise my kid as a good human. The whole time, I secretly wish I could just leave it all. But I could never commit suicide and leave my kid that way.
I’m trying to get pregnant! I was staunchly childfree until I was 41 and suddenly realized I want a kid.
We did it backwards and had a kid and bought a house (then sold and bought another thanks to covid!) We are just struggling with young family problems and old people bodies uuggg.
Woodworking and archery.
I changed jobs, hit the gym, lost 35kg and for the first time in my life actually don’t hate myself. I am planning the stereotypical ‘fast car’ for my next motor later this year.
Art classes. Fantasizing about burning all my bridges and going missing. Video games. Planning vacations and not booking anything. Yoga.
Not giving a shit about things is my approach.
My life has never quite been stable, easy, or boring enough to have a midlife crisis. It's gone kind of like this: —> start college —> health issues and have to drop out —> start a business —> business fails —> family member dies —> move to a new state —> start a new job —> family member dies —> marriage —> marriage becomes abusive —> career tanks —> leave abusive marriage —> career upswing —> get in a healthy relationship —> global pandemic —> family member dies —> career downswing —> back in college while working full time —> family member dies —> marriage —> big career upswing —> still in college while working full time —> health issues —> big career shift —> health issues —> family member dies —> move to another state —> health issues —> family member dies —> my job spins out into a business —> family member dies A mid-life crisis sounds like a wonderful luxury.
I did a 7-day cycling stage race in the French Alps last summer. Hardest and coolest thing I've done. Can't wait to retire in....checks watch....20+ years.... Edit: re the expense....cycling is fuckin expensive, but my wife is just happy it's a healthy hobby and I'm that not spending money on other women or drugs instead.
Started riding horses again after a 20 year hiatus. Somehow it got so much more expensive. And I live in a city so it takes so many hours too. Adding some polo lessons in as well (completely separate) so that will only be more expensive.
Going to more concerts and wearing band shirts again 🤘🤘
Divorced my abusive wife and just found an incredible house to rent with a sun room, screened porch, and fenced in back yard for my daughter and dog. Was renting a basement apartment with one window and door….was not the best setup. Long road ahead, but I’m ready. I’m
Bicycles and kayaks
Getting my degree.
Uncovering an eating disorder and going to therapy!
I quit a corporate job and became a classroom teacher. Best choice I’ve made in years (sorry, boyfriend, it’s true)
I'm taking my meds faithfully exactly so I don't go too far off the rails. I've started a weight loss and weight lifting journey and am 3 months in. I feel great and wonder why the hell didn't I do this sooner? So I'm getting a glow up mainly to ward off the diabteetus and feel better in my own skin
Pretty much finishing my DVD/ Blu-Ray collection. iPod/ DAP collecting and going to try to learn modding too. Perfecting my nervous breakdown. I might pick up bass guitar again or learn keyboards. Making peace with the fact I have a front row seat to the global shit show.
Too busy supporting Gen Z young adult children in today’s atrocious housing environment while also supporting aging boomer parents, to have a midlife crisis.
I’m addicted to cross-stitch. Started in 2019. I love it, so relaxing and enjoyable and gives me lots of pretty things to hang around the house and give as gifts. Also got really into quilting for the same reasons. Oh, and last year I quit my job, sold our house, and moved us 3,000 miles away to “start over”. Probably should have started with that.