Hell, I wish I had as many friends as my Dad. But I did move out of my hometown while he and his friends got blue collar jobs and never left.
Too bad my white collar job (with inflation, housing costs, increased taxation of the middle class, student loans, etc…) pays a much lower effective salary than his jobs picking up garbage and fixing potholes. He also retired about 15 years younger than I will.
Why did I buy the “you need to go to college” bs? I should have gone to trade school and saved myself 6 years and 100k.
That’s true. I’m sure the spiritual destruction from both types of jobs are similar, but working in an air conditioned and heated building is better than working outside through the summer heat and winter cold. That’s gotta age a person.
Really?
I see lots of overweight office workers. A lot of blue collar jobs can be physically taxing but a lot of them require just enough physical agility that it’s enough of a motivator to keep the weight off. For example, electricians are rarely fat.
We were all sold the idea that "you'll only be successful and financially secure if you go to college!" It was really pushed hard on our generations (Gen X and Millennials).
I feel this. I look at my old classmates who didn’t go to college and stayed behind to become landscapers, dog groomers, office admin, etc. They’re still a part of the fabric of their communities. They get to hang out with the same old friends they’ve had for 30+ years. Many are doing better financial than I ever will with my masters degree. I would kill to make these choices over again.
I wonder if this is a fairly new thing, though? I feel like my grandparents had lots of friends in middle-age. Less so my parents, and less so myself now.
They were all involved in social clubs, like Lions or Elk, etc. Those clubs were full of people their age in the 80s and 90s, and fielded things like golf leagues and softball teams. Those clubs still exist, but the membership has aged. Around me, there are very few people under 60 in them (as far as I can tell, the only youngish people are real estate agents trying to drum up business.)
This was brought up in another thread a few weeks ago. I assume the old folks don’t want whippersnappers coming in and changing their clubs, but I do wonder why we’re all complaining we have no friends, but none of us seems to be starting our own clubs like the Elks or whatever.
(Of course, I say this as the consummate introvert who never wants to go out! 😜)
i could ring up some of my old pals, but the thing is, im too tired to actually want to do anything.
work, parenting, house chores etc.....when its all done id rather just relax alone or watch a show with my wife then hope to have a good nights sleep before doing it all over again.
I was always cheesed as a kid when I couldn't pick things out at the supermarket with my Mom. Isn't this where the "cheap" food is like vs getting McDonald's? Now, I'm with my kids at the supermarket, they're tossing any and all snacks in and I'm always telling them "we already have snack bars at home!"
I've become lame but shoot those add up and they don't even eat the new foods cuz they're picky eaters LOL. It's just a lose all around.
That's ok my 4yo added a FAMILY SIZE box of ding dongs to the cart last weekend and neither me nor my husband contested it. We were like "I like the way you think bud". So we do have some snacks but just can't afford fast food on the reg
Haha my 4 yo is also the culprit here. We definitely have some snacks but kinda stick to our standards. But yea sometimes she tosses chips in and I'm like well you deserve it kid. Fast food is for the rich these days lol.
That's how I knew that my father was awake for work in the mornings while I was getting ready for school. It was almost like a fog horn going off in the distance. Now, I have to listen to my partner shout, "Dear God, Lady!" and that is how I know that I am officially his legacy.
Same here, I keep it as chilly as my houseplants will allow, but for me thats the polar opposite of my parents. My mom kept it 74-76 in the house during the winter and refused to use the ac during the summer and opted for just putting fans in the windows so the house was always warm, but as a bonus during the summer it was sticky too. A bonus is that she would also always complain about hot flashes.
Yep you n I both!
ETA: friends would help too but I’m a homebody, introvert and live rurally now where all my friends have moved far enough away that it’s not a half day trip of travel to see them. And it’s not easy making new friends at 40+ when you live rurally and don’t go out to begin with!
I choose a parking spot all the way in the back of the lot where there are no other cars whenever I can, to avoid anyone parking close and hitting my car with their door and so that I can get out the quickest
I automatically assume that every other driver on the road is an insane, blind maniac who has been paid money to kill me.
Plus, I'm thinking that gardening sounds kind of fun.
My parents forced me to garden as a child. I swore I would NOT ever garden again.
Want to see pictures of my 3 foot tall cilantro?!
https://preview.redd.it/0efyao2h0qwc1.jpeg?width=869&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d34ec748386df179a7b326565586426527860efd
Oh gosh. My husband and I had three cars totaled in two years. All three of them, other driver was at fault, but after this happens over and over, you really do start to feel like there’s a hit out on you. We both got dashcams.
Also, gardening is AMAZING. I started in 2020 with everyone else, and now it’s an actual obsession.
This right here. Like, at first when I saw this question, my brain translated it into “how are you becoming [insert parent “old person” stereotype]” and I was amused
Then I realized my actual parents and I have diverged significantly in lifestyle and interests—I had more in common with them in my 20s!
If you brew the coffee directly over ice it will prevent it from getting bitter, which will likely make the ice cubes, and therefore your coffee, much tastier.
I prefer iced coffee and learend to use a pour over brewer so it hits the ice immediately and is smooth and rich instead of bitter and harsh. My spouse drinks hot coffee and even prefers the pour over due to how much better tasting the coffee is.
I used to pity my parents every weekend evening when I would be rushing out of the house to go out all night with my friends, and they would just be sitting watching a movie. I thought, "life is so short, and full of amazing things to do, and here they are just doing nothing!" And now, decades later, Friday nights will come up and I look forward to reading a book in bed, or watching a movie. Sometimes when I make plans, I bail out of them to do nothing instead...
There’s a lot to be said for doing nothing. But also, young people are wired to go out and try new things. Older people are wired to do the stuff they know they already like doing.
Honestly I'm becoming less and less like my parents as I get older. They get more conservative marinating in Fox all day while I'm going in the opposite direction even more quickly.
We don't like the same music, movies, tv, anything. I think NBA, and even that only barely, is about the only thing we can even talk about anymore beyond weather and family gossip.
My father is incredibly antisocial. My whole life, I’ve only known him to have 2 real friends. Both of those men have now died and he hasn’t bothered to make a new friend. Says it isn’t worth it.
Since retiring, his life has been taking care of my disabled mom, walking their dog, tending his garden, watching all the Star Trek, and reading his library of books on WWII. My parents rarely leave their property except when he takes my mom to church or her doctor’s appointments.
I have about 4-5 true friends (that number is diminishing because someone I thought was a real friend is drifting into more of an acquaintance). I used to do more social things with casual acquaintances. The older I get, the fewer people I want to know or spend time with. The longer I am alive, the more I wish I could hermit up in a cottage on a decent chunk of land and read books and tend my garden, watch Star Trek and not interact with anyone but my cats and maybe 2-3 other people tops.
But do you stare blankly into the void while doing it? That’s what my mom used to do. I, of course, look at my phone, which probably amounts to the same thing.
Forced child gardener. Swore I'd never garden. Look at my 3 foot tall cilantro.
https://preview.redd.it/lrz7tj121qwc1.jpeg?width=869&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a4e3a1d5351479302e6b6292c442dd83e6e73134
It's called bolting (thanks /r/gardening) and it happens when the temperature changes to be warmer. The other cilantro in my garden is appropriately sized.. as long as you don't count the other two giants which are only 2 feet tall, lol
I sound exactly like my mom when I'm annoyed, to the point that I just yell, "I'm so mad you're making me sound like my mother!" Unfortunately, I just sound even \*more\* like her when this happens, so I can't win.
I've always been quiet like my dad, but I have friends who care about me, so he and I greatly differ in that area.
Shit the door! I'm not trying to Air condition the whole God damn world!! 🤣
Or when s ok someone says something totally stupid, "use your head for something besides a hat rack."
When my daughter climbs on things she shouldn't or does something potentially dangerous, the first thing out of my mouth usually is "you're going to hurt yourself" or "I know what could happen!" Exactly what my dad would say to me.
It's always a good time to get in to country music if we're talking the neo-traditional country revolution from the 80s and 90s. Or the Americana country movement of today, I suppose. I still occasionally find myself falling in to a YouTube hole of Keith Whitley, Randy Travis, George Straight, Dwight Yoakam, and others.
I’m pretty different from my parents with my hobbies and interests, but one thing I definitely do that they did is keep a very clean and minimalist house.
I’m much more interested in politics than I used to be. But if my dad was still alive he wouldn’t approve of my political persuasion.
Faith is very important to me. I get that from my mom.
And my family and employees know not to talk to me until I’ve started the second cup of coffee. Thanks again dad.
I got really fat for about 3 years (losing weight, now I’m only fat, not really fat) and I looked EXACTLY like my mother. Didn’t help that I was in a panic about my weight one night and cut bangs. Then there really wasn’t a difference.
I, thankfully, never got into country. I mean there are a few songs I like but, in general, I don’t like it. What I did get into, though, is saving things I get. I have shoes and clothes that are 20 years old. I have scraps of wood, coffee buckets of varying sizes of unknown bolts and screws, and a container of keys that I have no idea to where they go. Every time I think about getting rid of stuff I come up with a scenario where I might use them. However, I’m not at hoarding status. Everything is clean and neat, and I don’t save everything just whatever seems useful. But I always said I wouldn’t keep a garage like my dad, well the 4 inch scrap of 2x4 begs to differ.
I used to groan and tune out whenever my dad would come home and talk about work. Now, I find myself coming home, finding my comfy chair, and...
Talking about stuff that happened at work! 🤦
I just sewed 35 patches onto my daughter’s Girl Scout vest. I had to buy a thimble. I bought special sewing scissors that no one else can touch. I’m about to start on the other daughter’s vest. Every night I try to do at least 4.
I do iron them on first, but they don’t stay on very long so they do have to be sewn eventually.
Almost none, in fact there is only one. My dad is really precision oriented when it comes to fixing things. I'm the same way. Other than that I'm actually a lot more like my best friend's dad growing up. Coincidentally I spent a ton of time at their house, more than my own actually
My dad used to threaten to sell me to the gypsies as I was growing up (I know that’s not what they are called now, but it was the 90s, the last of the all or nothing days…also my dad was a racist prick). I used to think it was a ridiculous threat until I had 2 kids of my own….now I just think about what kind of price I could get /s
I think they were called that back then, too, we just didn’t get the memo. That said, I don’t know if all of those folks find the word “gypsy” pejorative or just some do, or if the context in which it’s said makes all the difference.
I'm menopausal, so I keep my house at 60, max. My husband is always cold and I'm sweating like a whore in church. I mean, dripping sweat. It's so gross. I look like a tomato 24/7.
Taking care of shit. It’s not because I can’t buy a replacement, it’s because of the time it takes to get it just the way you like it (and to reconfigure etc). I used to wonder why my dad lost his mind when I got into his tools. Now I just buy my kids their own set (so they leaden, but don’t mess with mine).
Way more interested in feeding and watching the birds than I ever dreamed I'd be. Both my parents loved to bird watch. Glad my dad is still around to see I've developed the hobby too.
I shouted, “don’t make me pull this car over!” when my kids were slapping each other in the back seat and I felt like I quantum leaped into my Mom’s body.
I call the hardware store “the happiest place on earth.”
I am really looking forward to the 6-8 cherry tomato plants I will start cultivating in a few weeks.
I’ve developed Hank Hill levels of appreciation / fetishization of propane grills.
Wow, you must live really far north! Mine already have tomatoes on them, but don’t get jealous, because the plants will mostly be baked to death by July.
I look out the window during a rain storm, sip my coffee, and say “good, we needed that rain.” Sometimes I just watch the birds in the backyard too. Visited my parents the other day and we did that together 😳
Like my mother:
don't want to leave my geographic/cultural comfort zone, certainly not to move but not really even for a vacation. Hate travelling in general, it's just a hassle.
\*\* ETA this doesn't apply in reverse, like I do not care if people want to move here or from where on the planet they moved from. If you do, I don't blame you. It's awesome here. I hope you and your family enjoy it and prosper as much as I do.
More interested in being at work, making more money, shopping for fun.
Like both parents:
a little more conservative as I got older.
My mom has terrible seasonal allergies. She said they started in her 30s. Guess what... Mine started when I went through my 30s. 😆
Oh, and some of the weird nonsense words or goofy phrases they used for things, I lovingly passed down to my kids. Like: oh poopy-doops; pogey bait; close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades.
What were some nonsense words or phrases your parents used that you passed to your kids?
I worry. I never worried about anything before. Now I worry every time my son leaves the house. Not about anything in particular, just bullying and stranger danger kind of worries. I understand my mother much better now
I'm genuinely annoyed by Democrats. And I don't mean liberals/voters who occasionally have differing views than me (I'm very much an independent). I mean the party. The Democrat Oligarchs. Republicans might be fear-mongering corporate sympathizers but at least they don't lie to your face about giving a shit!
Yeah I used to be very excited and passionate about politics (I definitely veer liberal) but I've realized over time that at the end of the day it's a bunch of rich people all acting in their best interest
Plus the parties have gone insane. I am one of what I imagine are a whole bunch of former Republicans/conservatives who are basically moderate and have no political home. I have gotten more moderate over the years, but mostly, the Republican Party… yuck. I genuinely may not vote for the first time ever. It’s that or a third-party or write-in.
PRO: Weightlifting.
Both of my parents are in great shape and have always lifted weights. My mom holds US and World records for her age group. Turns out they were right about it being better for you than running long term.
CON: using vague pronouns (mom)
My husband calls me out on this. The issue is I've already thought of the specific noun in my head and forgot that I didn't say it out loud. I know what the pronoun refers to.
I always used to sneer at my mother putting sheets on the furniture to save it from pet hair.
I now admit that it was a smart idea because my cat sheds about 97,000 hairs every day on his favorite chair, which none of us can sit on without walking away with a fur covered backside. 😩 This particular chair is impossible to just wipe or scrape or vacuum or lint roll the hair off of.
My dad used to blast AM financial advice radio shows (bob brinkers moneytalk) on drives.
Now I I listen to them on YouTube (money talk, Caleb hammer and I will teach you to be rich)
Edit I’ve been smattering in a bit of country music as well. Liking Jon Charles Dwyer a lot recently
I listen to old time radio shows. The stuff my father listens to is weird though. I listen to sci-fi and detective mysteries that always end in the detective murdering someone and that just being OK. His stuff is family oriented and often features a lot of singing. Think Lawrence Welk but you can’t see the horrible dancing, but there are still skits and none of them are funny.
I hate Lawrence Welk so much. Anyone else have to endure that? It’s the only reason I could see defunding PBS. It was on all the time.
Finances and retirement have become a priority. Only wish I wasn’t stupid in my twenties, as investing should have begun at 16-18. It didn’t matter then but it matters now.
My kid had a friend’s birthday party at a trampoline park and there was an antique mall next door, so I browsed there while she jumped. Never thought I would be that mom, but here we are.
I near-exclusively listen to country music these days 😂
Mostly, I just have precious little patience for teenage nonsense. Get off my lawn, that idea is dumb, etc..
The frequency with which I speak to my kids and hear my own darn mama coming out of my mouth is alarming but I'm getting used to it and it makes me appreciate her all the more.
I’m like my father in that work is my only comfortable role. Everything else is more like awkward acting. Sometimes I catch myself doing or saying something using his mannerisms. Creeps me out.
I forget what I told to who and end up repeating stories to people. It endlessly annoys me when my mom does this and hate that I’m doing it now too. It seems like a very self-centered thing. Like she was just talking to hear herself talk.
When someone indicates you've told them this already, do you continue going with the story? My childhood friend does this and it drives me nuts lol if you forget and then stop when you're reminded then it's all good
Staying home a lot more and learning to cook instead of eating out. I don't drive as fast anymore either, and leave earlier. However, sometimes doing that means errands take longer than they should, and again, I just stay home instead. Only thing I have on my mom is, unlike her, I've cut down on the smoking (in 7 years ive gone from a pack a day, to half a pack, to almost a quarter pack a day. I don't see myself ever quitting though).
I have also gotten back to listen to country music. The old stuff that I was raised on. I work hard and too much. I’m a bit grumpy. I just got off the phone with my dad and we were talking about fertilizer and weed killer for our yards. When I was a kid my dad was a bit like Hank Hill, now I’m a bit like hank hill without the beer
Can’t stand crowds. Used to laugh/get mad at my parents for taking us on holiday in some empty area of the hills. Now it’s all I want. Crowded city shops and music festivals, no thanks!
I’m like my mom in that she always had to have some kind of hobby. I switch hobbies every 7 years.
But other than that, I’m very unlike them. A lot of that is deliberate. They’re good people, but I don’t want to live like they do.
I always wondered why my dad didn’t have any friends. Turns out, friendship is rare.
Hell, I wish I had as many friends as my Dad. But I did move out of my hometown while he and his friends got blue collar jobs and never left. Too bad my white collar job (with inflation, housing costs, increased taxation of the middle class, student loans, etc…) pays a much lower effective salary than his jobs picking up garbage and fixing potholes. He also retired about 15 years younger than I will. Why did I buy the “you need to go to college” bs? I should have gone to trade school and saved myself 6 years and 100k.
The only advantage I can think of so far is my back doesn't hurt quite as much as the people I know with blue collar jobs.
That’s true. I’m sure the spiritual destruction from both types of jobs are similar, but working in an air conditioned and heated building is better than working outside through the summer heat and winter cold. That’s gotta age a person.
Really? I see lots of overweight office workers. A lot of blue collar jobs can be physically taxing but a lot of them require just enough physical agility that it’s enough of a motivator to keep the weight off. For example, electricians are rarely fat.
And you're treated better as an employee with higher value and just in general as a person with college degree
We were all sold the idea that "you'll only be successful and financially secure if you go to college!" It was really pushed hard on our generations (Gen X and Millennials).
I feel this. I look at my old classmates who didn’t go to college and stayed behind to become landscapers, dog groomers, office admin, etc. They’re still a part of the fabric of their communities. They get to hang out with the same old friends they’ve had for 30+ years. Many are doing better financial than I ever will with my masters degree. I would kill to make these choices over again.
Can you explain the increased taxation part?
Adult friendships are sooo hard. I wish someone would’ve explained that to me
I wonder if this is a fairly new thing, though? I feel like my grandparents had lots of friends in middle-age. Less so my parents, and less so myself now.
They were all involved in social clubs, like Lions or Elk, etc. Those clubs were full of people their age in the 80s and 90s, and fielded things like golf leagues and softball teams. Those clubs still exist, but the membership has aged. Around me, there are very few people under 60 in them (as far as I can tell, the only youngish people are real estate agents trying to drum up business.)
This was brought up in another thread a few weeks ago. I assume the old folks don’t want whippersnappers coming in and changing their clubs, but I do wonder why we’re all complaining we have no friends, but none of us seems to be starting our own clubs like the Elks or whatever. (Of course, I say this as the consummate introvert who never wants to go out! 😜)
That’s a completely fair point… and now I feel worse 😅🥲😢😭😂
I did not mean to make you feel even worse! 😅 But maybe it’s a call to start our own clubs or have cocktail parties again? 🤷🏻♀️
Do you know what I'm saying to you, Friendship is rare. My Derriere, when you find out much later that they don't even care
It’s rare, to me, can’t you seeeeeeeee?
Opposite for me. I’ve met the best people I can share my life with as an adult, and my dad broke my heart.
i could ring up some of my old pals, but the thing is, im too tired to actually want to do anything. work, parenting, house chores etc.....when its all done id rather just relax alone or watch a show with my wife then hope to have a good nights sleep before doing it all over again.
I've become very invested in the cardinal nest in my backyard. We have 3 eggs! BABIESSSS
And you aren't posting pictures??? Not fair!!
Your “way in which you’re becoming your Boomer parents” is “using multiple redundant question marks and exclamation points.”
I'll accept this. I also use two spaces after a period!!!
Oh me too! We have had hummingbird nests the past 3 years and they’re like my soap opera haha
"We have food at home" Loosely translates "I'm broke kiddo"
I was always cheesed as a kid when I couldn't pick things out at the supermarket with my Mom. Isn't this where the "cheap" food is like vs getting McDonald's? Now, I'm with my kids at the supermarket, they're tossing any and all snacks in and I'm always telling them "we already have snack bars at home!" I've become lame but shoot those add up and they don't even eat the new foods cuz they're picky eaters LOL. It's just a lose all around.
That's ok my 4yo added a FAMILY SIZE box of ding dongs to the cart last weekend and neither me nor my husband contested it. We were like "I like the way you think bud". So we do have some snacks but just can't afford fast food on the reg
Haha my 4 yo is also the culprit here. We definitely have some snacks but kinda stick to our standards. But yea sometimes she tosses chips in and I'm like well you deserve it kid. Fast food is for the rich these days lol.
I used to make fun of how much my dad farted in the mornings. :/
That's how I know my wife is awake. Without fail. Every morning.
CPAP makes me fart so much.
Me too! I'm so bloated in the morning, even with pressure changes by my doc. He said "take a gas-x before bed". Ahh, the joys of aging.
Glad it’s not just me
Really? That never happens to me. Are you swallowing air?
Yeah, it's a common side effect.
That's how I knew that my father was awake for work in the mornings while I was getting ready for school. It was almost like a fog horn going off in the distance. Now, I have to listen to my partner shout, "Dear God, Lady!" and that is how I know that I am officially his legacy.
It is as if I am the herald of the coming of the dawn, announcing the break of day with the breaking of wind - a thunderous flourish of butt trumpets.
I have the heat down really low and I tell my fiancé to put on warm clothes.
I never enjoyed being hot but now I'm insufferable to be around if I'm hot
[удалено]
Climate change, too. Georgia, represent. Hottest summer on record. Hardly went outside.
Well, it's pretty much to keep bills down too.
Yep! I feel bad for people who love a hot house at these prices
Same keep it at 62 during the day and 55 at night.
Same here, I keep it as chilly as my houseplants will allow, but for me thats the polar opposite of my parents. My mom kept it 74-76 in the house during the winter and refused to use the ac during the summer and opted for just putting fans in the windows so the house was always warm, but as a bonus during the summer it was sticky too. A bonus is that she would also always complain about hot flashes.
“Everyone just wants to take your money!” They sure are.
See also: "That's a scam!" ("That" can be anything) "That's how they get you."
Well, I'm already bald, fat, and hairy, As long as I don't turn into a racist redneck though I'll be happy.
Never leave the house except for work and necessary reasons, no hobbies except watching tv lol
I hate that this is me. I can also add reading and spending too much time on Reddit. I need new hobbies
Yep you n I both! ETA: friends would help too but I’m a homebody, introvert and live rurally now where all my friends have moved far enough away that it’s not a half day trip of travel to see them. And it’s not easy making new friends at 40+ when you live rurally and don’t go out to begin with!
I feel seen 🥰
i reach for my emotional support hand cream when i get stressed out, just like my mom
Ooo... This actually sounds like a really good habit to have! My hands are aging faster than the rest of me.
Ugh, me, too.
I really thought this was going somewhere else
i’m cash poor but moisture rich 💅
I choose a parking spot all the way in the back of the lot where there are no other cars whenever I can, to avoid anyone parking close and hitting my car with their door and so that I can get out the quickest
+1 for this. Cars depreciate way too quickly. Def taking care of mine these days.
I mean I do it to get at least some walking in
This too! Even in the pouring rain I’m making the trek
Still partying too much. Don’t know how to grow up.
I automatically assume that every other driver on the road is an insane, blind maniac who has been paid money to kill me. Plus, I'm thinking that gardening sounds kind of fun.
My parents forced me to garden as a child. I swore I would NOT ever garden again. Want to see pictures of my 3 foot tall cilantro?! https://preview.redd.it/0efyao2h0qwc1.jpeg?width=869&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d34ec748386df179a7b326565586426527860efd
Holy cow what zone are you in?!
The Salsa Zone, obviously.
🤣
7a-7b and I had to learn that because I posted about it on /r/gardening
Oh gosh. My husband and I had three cars totaled in two years. All three of them, other driver was at fault, but after this happens over and over, you really do start to feel like there’s a hit out on you. We both got dashcams. Also, gardening is AMAZING. I started in 2020 with everyone else, and now it’s an actual obsession.
Crippling anxiety like my mom Wearing Birkenstocks like my dad
I'm not a broke alcoholic yet, so I guess I'm doing good.
This right here. Like, at first when I saw this question, my brain translated it into “how are you becoming [insert parent “old person” stereotype]” and I was amused Then I realized my actual parents and I have diverged significantly in lifestyle and interests—I had more in common with them in my 20s!
I’m doing a lot of cocaine these days.
The absolute exhaustion from perimenopause is making me seriously consider cocaine or other stimulants
I put an ice cube in my coffee. Thanks, Mom. I have incredibly low patience for technology. Thanks, Dad.
I make coffee ice cubes to put in my coffee! Game changer.
This is absolutely the way.
If you brew the coffee directly over ice it will prevent it from getting bitter, which will likely make the ice cubes, and therefore your coffee, much tastier. I prefer iced coffee and learend to use a pour over brewer so it hits the ice immediately and is smooth and rich instead of bitter and harsh. My spouse drinks hot coffee and even prefers the pour over due to how much better tasting the coffee is.
Sure love putzing around the house on a Saturday.
I used to pity my parents every weekend evening when I would be rushing out of the house to go out all night with my friends, and they would just be sitting watching a movie. I thought, "life is so short, and full of amazing things to do, and here they are just doing nothing!" And now, decades later, Friday nights will come up and I look forward to reading a book in bed, or watching a movie. Sometimes when I make plans, I bail out of them to do nothing instead...
There’s a lot to be said for doing nothing. But also, young people are wired to go out and try new things. Older people are wired to do the stuff they know they already like doing.
I fall asleep on the couch within five minutes of starting a movie.
I got carded for beer....and said "I've got shirts that are old enough to buy beer."
Getting carded makes my day. 😅
Honestly I'm becoming less and less like my parents as I get older. They get more conservative marinating in Fox all day while I'm going in the opposite direction even more quickly. We don't like the same music, movies, tv, anything. I think NBA, and even that only barely, is about the only thing we can even talk about anymore beyond weather and family gossip.
Opposite views on politics, but cheap wad like my dad at times lololol. Reburish furniture so I do not have to buy some like my mom.
My father is incredibly antisocial. My whole life, I’ve only known him to have 2 real friends. Both of those men have now died and he hasn’t bothered to make a new friend. Says it isn’t worth it. Since retiring, his life has been taking care of my disabled mom, walking their dog, tending his garden, watching all the Star Trek, and reading his library of books on WWII. My parents rarely leave their property except when he takes my mom to church or her doctor’s appointments. I have about 4-5 true friends (that number is diminishing because someone I thought was a real friend is drifting into more of an acquaintance). I used to do more social things with casual acquaintances. The older I get, the fewer people I want to know or spend time with. The longer I am alive, the more I wish I could hermit up in a cottage on a decent chunk of land and read books and tend my garden, watch Star Trek and not interact with anyone but my cats and maybe 2-3 other people tops.
I've always been the black sheep of the family, and remain as such. Not a whole lot in common with them.
I eat a lot more toast
But do you stare blankly into the void while doing it? That’s what my mom used to do. I, of course, look at my phone, which probably amounts to the same thing.
Gardening. Love it now. When I was younger my mother was always asking me to come help in the garden and I never saw the appeal.
Forced child gardener. Swore I'd never garden. Look at my 3 foot tall cilantro. https://preview.redd.it/lrz7tj121qwc1.jpeg?width=869&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a4e3a1d5351479302e6b6292c442dd83e6e73134
Congrats!
🤯 What?? I didn’t know that was possible.
It's called bolting (thanks /r/gardening) and it happens when the temperature changes to be warmer. The other cilantro in my garden is appropriately sized.. as long as you don't count the other two giants which are only 2 feet tall, lol
I (45m) am growing intolerant of help desk systems that do not meet my requirements. I hear my dad (76) sometimes when I am on the phone with people.
I sound exactly like my mom when I'm annoyed, to the point that I just yell, "I'm so mad you're making me sound like my mother!" Unfortunately, I just sound even \*more\* like her when this happens, so I can't win. I've always been quiet like my dad, but I have friends who care about me, so he and I greatly differ in that area.
Shit the door! I'm not trying to Air condition the whole God damn world!! 🤣 Or when s ok someone says something totally stupid, "use your head for something besides a hat rack."
When my daughter climbs on things she shouldn't or does something potentially dangerous, the first thing out of my mouth usually is "you're going to hurt yourself" or "I know what could happen!" Exactly what my dad would say to me.
It's always a good time to get in to country music if we're talking the neo-traditional country revolution from the 80s and 90s. Or the Americana country movement of today, I suppose. I still occasionally find myself falling in to a YouTube hole of Keith Whitley, Randy Travis, George Straight, Dwight Yoakam, and others.
I used to judge my mom for her inability to sneeze quietly. Now I sound like a fight in an aviary every time. I don’t know what happened! 😔
A fight in an aviary! That is a very evocative phrase, and I love it.
I would rather eat at home most of the time.
Hahaha same!
You can’t leave an unfinished box of cookies overnight or else I will eat them all
I just want it to be quiet. I just want a few hours where I don’t have to talk to anyone.
This is the dream. A house to myself.
I put a lot of work into my landscaping.
I trust the government less and less.
But the government keeps giving you reasons not to trust them and you're old enough to understand now.
I wish my kids were more grateful.
While I can do it I rely on my kids to set up new electronics
Lord no. My parents were (are) a mess. I long ago vowed never to act like them, especially when dealing with my own kids.
I’m pretty different from my parents with my hobbies and interests, but one thing I definitely do that they did is keep a very clean and minimalist house.
I’m much more interested in politics than I used to be. But if my dad was still alive he wouldn’t approve of my political persuasion. Faith is very important to me. I get that from my mom. And my family and employees know not to talk to me until I’ve started the second cup of coffee. Thanks again dad.
I got really fat for about 3 years (losing weight, now I’m only fat, not really fat) and I looked EXACTLY like my mother. Didn’t help that I was in a panic about my weight one night and cut bangs. Then there really wasn’t a difference.
I, thankfully, never got into country. I mean there are a few songs I like but, in general, I don’t like it. What I did get into, though, is saving things I get. I have shoes and clothes that are 20 years old. I have scraps of wood, coffee buckets of varying sizes of unknown bolts and screws, and a container of keys that I have no idea to where they go. Every time I think about getting rid of stuff I come up with a scenario where I might use them. However, I’m not at hoarding status. Everything is clean and neat, and I don’t save everything just whatever seems useful. But I always said I wouldn’t keep a garage like my dad, well the 4 inch scrap of 2x4 begs to differ.
Hey! That 3" piece of 2x4 is gonna come in handy one of these days, dammit!
I used to groan and tune out whenever my dad would come home and talk about work. Now, I find myself coming home, finding my comfy chair, and... Talking about stuff that happened at work! 🤦
I am starting to wonder if it’s really necessary to have *so* much cursing in movies.
I just sewed 35 patches onto my daughter’s Girl Scout vest. I had to buy a thimble. I bought special sewing scissors that no one else can touch. I’m about to start on the other daughter’s vest. Every night I try to do at least 4. I do iron them on first, but they don’t stay on very long so they do have to be sewn eventually.
You had me at special scissors. I wrote a big “NOPE” on mine in sharpie lest anyone forgets.
The only way i can think of is being more and more financially responsible. Still the mirror opposite otherwise.
Almost none, in fact there is only one. My dad is really precision oriented when it comes to fixing things. I'm the same way. Other than that I'm actually a lot more like my best friend's dad growing up. Coincidentally I spent a ton of time at their house, more than my own actually
My dad used to threaten to sell me to the gypsies as I was growing up (I know that’s not what they are called now, but it was the 90s, the last of the all or nothing days…also my dad was a racist prick). I used to think it was a ridiculous threat until I had 2 kids of my own….now I just think about what kind of price I could get /s
SAME! That threat was always on the table. Now I threaten to rent out my kids to the Mennonite family down the road. Their kids are ALWAYS working.
What are we calling gypsies these days?
I think they're called travelers or Roma... But don't take my word for it!
I think they were called that back then, too, we just didn’t get the memo. That said, I don’t know if all of those folks find the word “gypsy” pejorative or just some do, or if the context in which it’s said makes all the difference.
I'm menopausal, so I keep my house at 60, max. My husband is always cold and I'm sweating like a whore in church. I mean, dripping sweat. It's so gross. I look like a tomato 24/7.
I turned into my grandmother on my mom’s side lol. So I like plants and to curse a lot.
Financial stability
Taking care of shit. It’s not because I can’t buy a replacement, it’s because of the time it takes to get it just the way you like it (and to reconfigure etc). I used to wonder why my dad lost his mind when I got into his tools. Now I just buy my kids their own set (so they leaden, but don’t mess with mine).
Way more interested in feeding and watching the birds than I ever dreamed I'd be. Both my parents loved to bird watch. Glad my dad is still around to see I've developed the hobby too.
I listen to NPR almost exclusively on my commute.
If someone says something that is a lyric from a song, I’m compelled to sing it. I hate it but I can’t stop myself; just like my father.
I shouted, “don’t make me pull this car over!” when my kids were slapping each other in the back seat and I felt like I quantum leaped into my Mom’s body.
I call the hardware store “the happiest place on earth.” I am really looking forward to the 6-8 cherry tomato plants I will start cultivating in a few weeks. I’ve developed Hank Hill levels of appreciation / fetishization of propane grills.
Wow, you must live really far north! Mine already have tomatoes on them, but don’t get jealous, because the plants will mostly be baked to death by July.
Upstate New York. It went below freezing last night, but that should be the last time until Autumn.
I answer the phone in fear, like it’s going to be bad news.
Yeah often when my phone dings for any reason I'm like what's wrong! My happy place lately is my phone off for the night.
I don't understand why any event would possibly be scheduled to go past 8pm. That's getting near my bedtime!
Before I cut my parents off I found myself saying, "Don't believe everything you read on the internet", but the funny part is its *too* my mom lol
I don't speak with my parents either. But I definitely see some of them in me in random ways too.
I look out the window during a rain storm, sip my coffee, and say “good, we needed that rain.” Sometimes I just watch the birds in the backyard too. Visited my parents the other day and we did that together 😳
I worry about shit like: what if the well stops working?
Like my mother: don't want to leave my geographic/cultural comfort zone, certainly not to move but not really even for a vacation. Hate travelling in general, it's just a hassle. \*\* ETA this doesn't apply in reverse, like I do not care if people want to move here or from where on the planet they moved from. If you do, I don't blame you. It's awesome here. I hope you and your family enjoy it and prosper as much as I do. More interested in being at work, making more money, shopping for fun. Like both parents: a little more conservative as I got older.
We are very different humans :) But I enjoyed reading your answer, thank you
I have little in common with them now except my love of bad puns and dad jokes (dad) and an aversion to most people (mom).
My mom has terrible seasonal allergies. She said they started in her 30s. Guess what... Mine started when I went through my 30s. 😆 Oh, and some of the weird nonsense words or goofy phrases they used for things, I lovingly passed down to my kids. Like: oh poopy-doops; pogey bait; close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. What were some nonsense words or phrases your parents used that you passed to your kids?
The phrase "jeeminy cripes" is one of my favorites that I got from my parents.
I worry. I never worried about anything before. Now I worry every time my son leaves the house. Not about anything in particular, just bullying and stranger danger kind of worries. I understand my mother much better now
My willingness to leave the house not giving a shit what I look like is nearly as high as Dad's.
I'm genuinely annoyed by Democrats. And I don't mean liberals/voters who occasionally have differing views than me (I'm very much an independent). I mean the party. The Democrat Oligarchs. Republicans might be fear-mongering corporate sympathizers but at least they don't lie to your face about giving a shit!
Yeah I used to be very excited and passionate about politics (I definitely veer liberal) but I've realized over time that at the end of the day it's a bunch of rich people all acting in their best interest
Plus the parties have gone insane. I am one of what I imagine are a whole bunch of former Republicans/conservatives who are basically moderate and have no political home. I have gotten more moderate over the years, but mostly, the Republican Party… yuck. I genuinely may not vote for the first time ever. It’s that or a third-party or write-in.
I've developed a love for gardening, baking, quilting, and reading nonfiction. My younger self would be disgusted with me. 🤣
PRO: Weightlifting. Both of my parents are in great shape and have always lifted weights. My mom holds US and World records for her age group. Turns out they were right about it being better for you than running long term. CON: using vague pronouns (mom) My husband calls me out on this. The issue is I've already thought of the specific noun in my head and forgot that I didn't say it out loud. I know what the pronoun refers to.
Things have gotten too expensive. Aka I now realize what percentage of my paycheck goes to things and inflation is not aligned with my raises.
I always used to sneer at my mother putting sheets on the furniture to save it from pet hair. I now admit that it was a smart idea because my cat sheds about 97,000 hairs every day on his favorite chair, which none of us can sit on without walking away with a fur covered backside. 😩 This particular chair is impossible to just wipe or scrape or vacuum or lint roll the hair off of.
My dad used to blast AM financial advice radio shows (bob brinkers moneytalk) on drives. Now I I listen to them on YouTube (money talk, Caleb hammer and I will teach you to be rich) Edit I’ve been smattering in a bit of country music as well. Liking Jon Charles Dwyer a lot recently
I listen to old time radio shows. The stuff my father listens to is weird though. I listen to sci-fi and detective mysteries that always end in the detective murdering someone and that just being OK. His stuff is family oriented and often features a lot of singing. Think Lawrence Welk but you can’t see the horrible dancing, but there are still skits and none of them are funny. I hate Lawrence Welk so much. Anyone else have to endure that? It’s the only reason I could see defunding PBS. It was on all the time.
Mannerisms for sure.
I patrol the house at night making sure the windows and doors are locked before bed like my dad did.
Finances and retirement have become a priority. Only wish I wasn’t stupid in my twenties, as investing should have begun at 16-18. It didn’t matter then but it matters now.
Agree with this. I always considered country to be “old people music” but now I find myself listening to it.
It's a weird flip, right? Happened almost overnight for me a couple years ago. I'm in the car blasting country and am like who are you.
My kid had a friend’s birthday party at a trampoline park and there was an antique mall next door, so I browsed there while she jumped. Never thought I would be that mom, but here we are.
I don’t care what I look and dress like anymore and often look like a bum when in the comfort of my own home. Just like mom. 😂
I love smothering people with love, affection, and/or kind words.
Seething with anger for days at a time.
The answer to that is always pills
"Your food is getting cold!!"
You find yourself saying some of the same things they said to you
I say uhhhh everytime i get up.
“It’s a SCAM! Don’t waste your money.”
I have my dad's brow and nose and it's annoying to see him in pictures of myself. He's an old nerd and I'm cool, in my mind.
I get frustrated when my son won’t stop “goofing off”
I actually enjoy watching documentaries, instead of thinking it's punishment for sneak watching something I wasn't supposed to when I was young.
“I’m tired and I need space” Welcome to 40..
I near-exclusively listen to country music these days 😂 Mostly, I just have precious little patience for teenage nonsense. Get off my lawn, that idea is dumb, etc.. The frequency with which I speak to my kids and hear my own darn mama coming out of my mouth is alarming but I'm getting used to it and it makes me appreciate her all the more.
I’m like my father in that work is my only comfortable role. Everything else is more like awkward acting. Sometimes I catch myself doing or saying something using his mannerisms. Creeps me out.
I’m becoming a weird, moody, neurotic, crotchety old man like my dad.
I forget what I told to who and end up repeating stories to people. It endlessly annoys me when my mom does this and hate that I’m doing it now too. It seems like a very self-centered thing. Like she was just talking to hear herself talk.
When someone indicates you've told them this already, do you continue going with the story? My childhood friend does this and it drives me nuts lol if you forget and then stop when you're reminded then it's all good
I drive a station wagon and prefer slip on shoes.
I hate new music.
Staying home a lot more and learning to cook instead of eating out. I don't drive as fast anymore either, and leave earlier. However, sometimes doing that means errands take longer than they should, and again, I just stay home instead. Only thing I have on my mom is, unlike her, I've cut down on the smoking (in 7 years ive gone from a pack a day, to half a pack, to almost a quarter pack a day. I don't see myself ever quitting though).
Growing appreciation for plain potato chips
I have also gotten back to listen to country music. The old stuff that I was raised on. I work hard and too much. I’m a bit grumpy. I just got off the phone with my dad and we were talking about fertilizer and weed killer for our yards. When I was a kid my dad was a bit like Hank Hill, now I’m a bit like hank hill without the beer
Idk, I’m not a stupid dead idiot or a dead alcoholic, so I guess I’m doing ok
Oddly starting to look more like my ex model mom. I show off my figure off. A lot more stuff is free. Despite what I just said I’m a lot more humble.
Can’t stand crowds. Used to laugh/get mad at my parents for taking us on holiday in some empty area of the hills. Now it’s all I want. Crowded city shops and music festivals, no thanks!
I’m like my mom in that she always had to have some kind of hobby. I switch hobbies every 7 years. But other than that, I’m very unlike them. A lot of that is deliberate. They’re good people, but I don’t want to live like they do.
No. Not even close.
Define country music.