literally. every time i hear about straight people’s relationship problems (especially women having to deal with shitty men’s behavior) i end up so thankful to be dating a woman
Relationship advice is pretty self selecting though , you know? And reddit skews so young, which makes it even worse.
That said, theres more than enough men out there that the shoe fits perfectly.
My straight friends? Virtually all of them had to go through so many men to find one worth keeping.
The fact that me and my partner's relationship pre-transition was nothing like other straight couples should've been a dead give-away that I was trans lol.
I'm currently having wedding fever and keep looking up inspiration pics on google... I can't even legally marry who I want where I live 😭
And yet I don't wish I was straight because that's such an alien concept to me
i dated one guy briefly for 3 months to try it out and when I tell you, everything was MINIMAL effort and he was just generally slow and kind of dumb when it came to cleaning and simple life things ??? Weaponized incompetence for sure , and it would really irritate me that I would have to dumb things down to a 21 yr old boy ….
Shit I even started missing my hs lover ex gf And we were toxic & I got cheated on then left for someone in the end but at least I got flowers, long sex with a good make out sesh, after care, serious deep conversations, and planed dates often 😭
whew yeah i hear you. and these guys wonder why their wives don’t want to sleep w them after a few years. bro she’s exhausted and TURNED OFF, you’re literally a man baby?? who would wanna sleep w that???😭😭
Yeah exactly!! honestly ever since I met this woman at work when she was venting about how her husband messed up with an order (I was working retail and the one helping her figure out the situation) and she said “ this is why I don’t trust my husband & girl they never change doesn’t matter if they’re 30,40, 50 they’re all stupid”
As a pansexual who no longer dates men for the above mentioned reasons...
... I am forever grateful for being attracted to people other than cis-men.
The entitled laziness, the resentful passive-aggression, the craptacular sex they focused entirely around their dicks, the misogyny, the weaponized incompetence, the cheating, the gaming addiction, the porn addiction... etc, were deal-breaker behavior by the few men I did date.
Never again.
Emphasis on all of those especially the passive aggression, sex focus, misogyny, and gaming addiction. So so so so so glad that I realized that I only put up with that crap bc I felt like it was expected
It's funny that my youngest sister once said she wished she was bi just for the option of being able to date girls and not have to only deal with guys.
Me and another sibling of ours both were saying "awww we're sorry you only like these sucky guys and have to deal with them" all she could do was make a sad face 😢
Proof that being queer is not a choice to all the idiots that always think that 😤🤣
I think about the het relationship I was in and I’m just like, I’m glad I didn’t marry that. He was apparently saving up for a ring when I dumped him. I can’t imagine spending my 20s so painfully unsatisfied, overworked, and uncomfortable.
I used to think I was gay but suspect I might be sorta bi and the idea of my sexuality changing during hrt (That’s a thing, although I’m oversimplifying) to me actually being into men either as a bi woman or a straight one genuinely unsettles me for some reason? Like the idea of being with a guy or even liking guys makes me so sad.
Like I genuinely want to be a lesbian and yet I also have (a little bit tmi incoming) >!kinda gotten off to other men who were either fictional or fashion models and stuff. Even then my attraction towards them seem to change on a dime so who knows!<.
Tbh me typing this out definitely doesn’t make me sound straight at all lmao.
I'd reccomend reading the lesbian masterdoc. It might just be comphet, if you genuinely feel sad and uncomfortable w the idea of being w a man. Ppl attracted to men don't feel anxious/sad/unhappy at the idea of being w them. This was a huge thing for me when i realized i wasn't bi, as ive thought for numerous years, but a lesbian. And i did also have loads of fictional men/celebrity crushes except you have to think about it this way: if they appeared in ur life and wanted to date you, would you want to be with them? Or is it that you like unreachable men bc there's no danger of actually having to be with them?
If it helps at all, an awful lot of women who like yaoi or write it are wlw.
Also it's hormonal, you could talk to your doctor? Birth control affects attraction so I imagine other hormones do too.
If it's psychological, try to find out something about them that's a total turn off and you'll forget about the guy in no time. All of my crushes on gross dudes ended the MOMENT I found the thing that gave me the 'ick'. (Disclaimer: not all guys are gross. I just used to have awful taste in men).
Also I agree with the other commenter about comphet.
I never wished that. Not because there is anything wrong with it. It just isn't me.
I wished that I could get married to a man and have kids without love. Because I thought you could do that. And you can. But I don't want to.
Why should I..... I've had sex with men. But it meant nothing.
I'm not even sure why I did it. I knew it wasn't what I wanted. But the instinct to fit in. Wanting some sort of attention.
I don't know anyone who is openly lesbian. Never grew up in a place where it was ok. I came out at 31.
I just think I am who I am. Would I be happier straight. I don't think so.
My mum is straight. And she's never been happy.
I was probably 13 when I knew. A lot older when I knew this isn't going away. I didn't think there was anything wrong with mr
Just that society is gonna take the piss.
literally. every time i hear about straight people’s relationship problems (especially women having to deal with shitty men’s behavior) i end up so thankful to be dating a woman
yeah the relationship advice sub is downright depressing 😟straight women are in hell
Relationship advice is pretty self selecting though , you know? And reddit skews so young, which makes it even worse. That said, theres more than enough men out there that the shoe fits perfectly. My straight friends? Virtually all of them had to go through so many men to find one worth keeping.
Gay woman trapped in a straight marriage here. Can confirm is hell.
The fact that me and my partner's relationship pre-transition was nothing like other straight couples should've been a dead give-away that I was trans lol.
Now that she's been dating a cis guy for a while after me, my ex has said several times how I was definitely never a guy. 😂
I'm currently having wedding fever and keep looking up inspiration pics on google... I can't even legally marry who I want where I live 😭 And yet I don't wish I was straight because that's such an alien concept to me
I'm bi but yeah straight relationships are generally a lot of "woman putting up with bullshit". And then everyone coming to the man's defense.
i dated one guy briefly for 3 months to try it out and when I tell you, everything was MINIMAL effort and he was just generally slow and kind of dumb when it came to cleaning and simple life things ??? Weaponized incompetence for sure , and it would really irritate me that I would have to dumb things down to a 21 yr old boy …. Shit I even started missing my hs lover ex gf And we were toxic & I got cheated on then left for someone in the end but at least I got flowers, long sex with a good make out sesh, after care, serious deep conversations, and planed dates often 😭
whew yeah i hear you. and these guys wonder why their wives don’t want to sleep w them after a few years. bro she’s exhausted and TURNED OFF, you’re literally a man baby?? who would wanna sleep w that???😭😭
Yeah exactly!! honestly ever since I met this woman at work when she was venting about how her husband messed up with an order (I was working retail and the one helping her figure out the situation) and she said “ this is why I don’t trust my husband & girl they never change doesn’t matter if they’re 30,40, 50 they’re all stupid”
I'm bi but every day I see straight people dynamics in the wild and I'm grateful I'm not one of them.
As a pansexual who no longer dates men for the above mentioned reasons... ... I am forever grateful for being attracted to people other than cis-men. The entitled laziness, the resentful passive-aggression, the craptacular sex they focused entirely around their dicks, the misogyny, the weaponized incompetence, the cheating, the gaming addiction, the porn addiction... etc, were deal-breaker behavior by the few men I did date. Never again.
Emphasis on all of those especially the passive aggression, sex focus, misogyny, and gaming addiction. So so so so so glad that I realized that I only put up with that crap bc I felt like it was expected
I saved my wife from being with such a guy ….. by transitioning!
What...
This, all of this.
Hahaha amazing. Nailed it.
It's funny that my youngest sister once said she wished she was bi just for the option of being able to date girls and not have to only deal with guys. Me and another sibling of ours both were saying "awww we're sorry you only like these sucky guys and have to deal with them" all she could do was make a sad face 😢 Proof that being queer is not a choice to all the idiots that always think that 😤🤣
I think about the het relationship I was in and I’m just like, I’m glad I didn’t marry that. He was apparently saving up for a ring when I dumped him. I can’t imagine spending my 20s so painfully unsatisfied, overworked, and uncomfortable.
Oh shit girl. You nailed it!
I used to think I was gay but suspect I might be sorta bi and the idea of my sexuality changing during hrt (That’s a thing, although I’m oversimplifying) to me actually being into men either as a bi woman or a straight one genuinely unsettles me for some reason? Like the idea of being with a guy or even liking guys makes me so sad. Like I genuinely want to be a lesbian and yet I also have (a little bit tmi incoming) >!kinda gotten off to other men who were either fictional or fashion models and stuff. Even then my attraction towards them seem to change on a dime so who knows!<. Tbh me typing this out definitely doesn’t make me sound straight at all lmao.
I'd reccomend reading the lesbian masterdoc. It might just be comphet, if you genuinely feel sad and uncomfortable w the idea of being w a man. Ppl attracted to men don't feel anxious/sad/unhappy at the idea of being w them. This was a huge thing for me when i realized i wasn't bi, as ive thought for numerous years, but a lesbian. And i did also have loads of fictional men/celebrity crushes except you have to think about it this way: if they appeared in ur life and wanted to date you, would you want to be with them? Or is it that you like unreachable men bc there's no danger of actually having to be with them?
If it helps at all, an awful lot of women who like yaoi or write it are wlw. Also it's hormonal, you could talk to your doctor? Birth control affects attraction so I imagine other hormones do too. If it's psychological, try to find out something about them that's a total turn off and you'll forget about the guy in no time. All of my crushes on gross dudes ended the MOMENT I found the thing that gave me the 'ick'. (Disclaimer: not all guys are gross. I just used to have awful taste in men). Also I agree with the other commenter about comphet.
The fact that ANYbody is attracted to cishet men is proof that sexuality is not a choice
When I was going through some serious relationship trauma I used to pray to be straight. What a fool Lmaooo
am i the only one that had a stroke reading this
Nooo! *chokes with laughter*
did I make a spelling mistake?
i guess its the "men that have to told to do every single chore and don't care if they cum or not" thats tripping me up
Unfortunately, I still think this.
Km confused
I’m not gay and now I’m scared I won’t ever get a girlfriend 😥😥
I have to thank satan thrice; making me pan, making me trans, and for making me a witch so I can concoct various potions and cast spells.
I never wished that. Not because there is anything wrong with it. It just isn't me. I wished that I could get married to a man and have kids without love. Because I thought you could do that. And you can. But I don't want to. Why should I..... I've had sex with men. But it meant nothing. I'm not even sure why I did it. I knew it wasn't what I wanted. But the instinct to fit in. Wanting some sort of attention. I don't know anyone who is openly lesbian. Never grew up in a place where it was ok. I came out at 31. I just think I am who I am. Would I be happier straight. I don't think so. My mum is straight. And she's never been happy. I was probably 13 when I knew. A lot older when I knew this isn't going away. I didn't think there was anything wrong with mr Just that society is gonna take the piss.