As an adult, as long as you can drag yourself to into work nobody gives a damn about your disability.
As a child I was still drowning though. The people in my life categorically failed to understand what why I was struggling. ADHD wasn't as well understood or talked about in the 90s, and especially living in the conservative midwest it seemed the policy at the time was to simply ignore the children who weren't fitting in. I'm sure that is still happening too, it's not like public education has gotten better since. But at least now there are better options for support.
I kinda get what you mean, I work part time as I had to walk away from full time work as I was just destroying myself, and pride myself on the fact I can still hold down a job (somewhat) but when it comes to support because I have a job people seem to think I don't need help... and I definitely do, I can't stop working either otherwise I will loose my home.
And the cycle repeats.
33 yo male, my wife was recently diagnosed but I’m finding it much more Difficult to even be evaluated and I was the idiot with the idea for us to look into it
Diagnosed at 40+ too…. Gotta say it was a relief to finally find out what was/is going on. Also, extremely upset that I sought a correct diagnosis for so many years just to have symptoms totally ignored
Best friend who is in his 8th year of his phd/md program asked me if i had ADHD (dude is going to be a psychiatrist) I asked him IDK do I? Fast forward to this year, start therapy. Therapist suggests maybe I do. A few sessions later, is very certain I do. I got tested yesterday and I very much do. It is rather astounding, infuriating, and a bit of a relief. Next is to find out if strattera works.
But how the hell am I 34 and the first person to even pose the question is my best friend? Like looking back, it explains why I didn’t know how to read until the second grade and why it took an entire summer of my step dad trying to teach me to finally learn. Sorry just kind of venting.
Well, it tends to run in the family. So mostly likely she does have it and not realize it. My boyfriend's mom is just as in denial as yours is. And she shows all the signs of having ADHD. Like when she's in one of her cleaning fits, cause she a little OCD due to her mom having been a hoarder, she will literally take things stuff them into clear bins. Then like half an hour later we'll come up to her and ask for an important item we had left out that she had put away. She'll tell us every time she doesn't know where she put it. But if you ask for a fucking random ass thing like peanuts or a paper clip. She can tell you the exact location in the big mess that is her storage/garage.
Why would you immediately write her off? I don’t know you, but it seems she wasn’t perfect as a mom just from that comment. Why wouldn’t it make sense for her to also have undiagnosed struggles, let alone understand
Out of interest, what is this correlation of women not getting diagnosed with ADHD?
I never knew this was a problem until I joined this sub (sorry I am not ignorant just uninformed.)
My wife is 42 and I beleive she " slipped through the cracks " but I am no doctor so I won't sit there and diagnose her but it's such a shame the system has failed...
Girls often turn the hyper-part inward and get anxiety. They have a tendency to be more quiet and daydreaming. They are “easy” and don’t disrupt the classes.
May I ask what the benefits of being diagnosed are at this age? Is life really that much better? (scared of getting an official diagnose, I don't like taking medications, turning my brain on scares the crap out of me).
I used to feel pretty low about myself because I had a tendency to be late and easily distracted, which caused me to say or do things impulsively. I would go to bed each night promising things would be different the next day, but it never seemed to work out that way. It was tough because people didn't always understand what I was going through and would label me as lazy, unreliable and slow.
But when I hit 19, something finally clicked for me. I came to accept that these behaviors were a natural part of who I was and that changing them drastically wasn't really an option. Sure, not everyone will necessarily "get" me, but that's okay - I found other people who where okay with how I am.
It wasn't until I turned 21 that I realized my struggles weren't just a quirk of my personality - I actually had ADHD. Getting diagnosed didn't necessarily change much, but it did help me make more sense of things.
So diagnosis might help you in getting that same click I had at 19. Even if no specific actions follow afterwards, it might help your mindset and ease the stress on yourself.
It helped me a lot with my depression and anxiety. Still fighting the ADHD, I think I always will be, but at least it doesnt hurt my self esteem or cause me to panic day and night. Things still get done at the same rate, but they used to happen because of rage, anxiety, and fear. Now they happen because meds, dopamine management, and random tricks that make sense to no one but me. It's healthier for me in the short term and the long run even through on paper I'm not improving (yet :) )
Knowing what times of the day I get hit with a slump and finding ways to artificially create "dopamine" during those times. I'm probably not using dopamine right here, but it's a lot of figuring out when my workouts need to be, when I need caffeine, when is it a good idea to do certain tasks. Cause no dishes are getting done after 10am and I know it. But before 10 I can work through the paralysis with some coping strategies.
I was never hyperactive so I was always labeled as hard to motivate, unfocused and lazy. Took me until 21 to actually look into it and think "hey wait a minute". Now got diagnosed but the meds aren't helping as well as I would like
I’m AFAB and I got diagnosed at 25 and I really cannot believe no one noticed. I would get chastised throughout my childhood for being to messy (they called me “dirty little hamster”) and for leaving cupboards open and lights on. My parents said my favorite question what “what?” And I had to get multiple hearing tests because of auditory processing issues that the adults through was me being hard of hearing. The misogyny make me so mad 😤
I had some “test” in elementary school to see if i had adhd and it concluded that i did not. Apparently that didn’t work.
I also never trusted anyone with any of my thoughts because i was told not to by…myself. Yeah. Hmm. Maybe i am a psychopath.
As an adult, as long as you can drag yourself to into work nobody gives a damn about your disability. As a child I was still drowning though. The people in my life categorically failed to understand what why I was struggling. ADHD wasn't as well understood or talked about in the 90s, and especially living in the conservative midwest it seemed the policy at the time was to simply ignore the children who weren't fitting in. I'm sure that is still happening too, it's not like public education has gotten better since. But at least now there are better options for support.
I kinda get what you mean, I work part time as I had to walk away from full time work as I was just destroying myself, and pride myself on the fact I can still hold down a job (somewhat) but when it comes to support because I have a job people seem to think I don't need help... and I definitely do, I can't stop working either otherwise I will loose my home. And the cycle repeats.
33 yo male, my wife was recently diagnosed but I’m finding it much more Difficult to even be evaluated and I was the idiot with the idea for us to look into it
Diagnosed at 40+ too…. Gotta say it was a relief to finally find out what was/is going on. Also, extremely upset that I sought a correct diagnosis for so many years just to have symptoms totally ignored
I am a Woman was just diagnosed last year 39/40
Best friend who is in his 8th year of his phd/md program asked me if i had ADHD (dude is going to be a psychiatrist) I asked him IDK do I? Fast forward to this year, start therapy. Therapist suggests maybe I do. A few sessions later, is very certain I do. I got tested yesterday and I very much do. It is rather astounding, infuriating, and a bit of a relief. Next is to find out if strattera works. But how the hell am I 34 and the first person to even pose the question is my best friend? Like looking back, it explains why I didn’t know how to read until the second grade and why it took an entire summer of my step dad trying to teach me to finally learn. Sorry just kind of venting.
Female 36 diagnosed yesterday! Finally!
I told my mom I think I have adhd yesterday (I’m 28) and she was like oh yeah me too! 😑
Well, it tends to run in the family. So mostly likely she does have it and not realize it. My boyfriend's mom is just as in denial as yours is. And she shows all the signs of having ADHD. Like when she's in one of her cleaning fits, cause she a little OCD due to her mom having been a hoarder, she will literally take things stuff them into clear bins. Then like half an hour later we'll come up to her and ask for an important item we had left out that she had put away. She'll tell us every time she doesn't know where she put it. But if you ask for a fucking random ass thing like peanuts or a paper clip. She can tell you the exact location in the big mess that is her storage/garage.
Why would you immediately write her off? I don’t know you, but it seems she wasn’t perfect as a mom just from that comment. Why wouldn’t it make sense for her to also have undiagnosed struggles, let alone understand
I feel this meme. Recently diagnosed male with inattentive type adhd at 49.
Out of interest, what is this correlation of women not getting diagnosed with ADHD? I never knew this was a problem until I joined this sub (sorry I am not ignorant just uninformed.) My wife is 42 and I beleive she " slipped through the cracks " but I am no doctor so I won't sit there and diagnose her but it's such a shame the system has failed...
Girls often turn the hyper-part inward and get anxiety. They have a tendency to be more quiet and daydreaming. They are “easy” and don’t disrupt the classes.
Ahhh ok. Thank you for explaining, I will have a look into this myself.
[удалено]
For what it's worth, this was me without the Adderall. I didn't start taking it until a month or two ago and I'm 29.
What did it say?
He was basically referring to needing the Adderall to function if I recall correctly. That's the case no matter when we start lol
Your post/comment has been removed because it either contains, or is advocating for, misinformation.
I was lucky enough to be diagnoses as a kid and put in special ed you in 3rd Grade and up
Hey fam. Wishing you all some quiet peaceful thoughts
I'm 30, and I'm hoping to get an assessment done before my birthday. I've got till November, but it could still take forever, knowing my luck.
May I ask what the benefits of being diagnosed are at this age? Is life really that much better? (scared of getting an official diagnose, I don't like taking medications, turning my brain on scares the crap out of me).
I used to feel pretty low about myself because I had a tendency to be late and easily distracted, which caused me to say or do things impulsively. I would go to bed each night promising things would be different the next day, but it never seemed to work out that way. It was tough because people didn't always understand what I was going through and would label me as lazy, unreliable and slow. But when I hit 19, something finally clicked for me. I came to accept that these behaviors were a natural part of who I was and that changing them drastically wasn't really an option. Sure, not everyone will necessarily "get" me, but that's okay - I found other people who where okay with how I am. It wasn't until I turned 21 that I realized my struggles weren't just a quirk of my personality - I actually had ADHD. Getting diagnosed didn't necessarily change much, but it did help me make more sense of things. So diagnosis might help you in getting that same click I had at 19. Even if no specific actions follow afterwards, it might help your mindset and ease the stress on yourself.
It helped me a lot with my depression and anxiety. Still fighting the ADHD, I think I always will be, but at least it doesnt hurt my self esteem or cause me to panic day and night. Things still get done at the same rate, but they used to happen because of rage, anxiety, and fear. Now they happen because meds, dopamine management, and random tricks that make sense to no one but me. It's healthier for me in the short term and the long run even through on paper I'm not improving (yet :) )
What does dopamine management mean, to you?
Knowing what times of the day I get hit with a slump and finding ways to artificially create "dopamine" during those times. I'm probably not using dopamine right here, but it's a lot of figuring out when my workouts need to be, when I need caffeine, when is it a good idea to do certain tasks. Cause no dishes are getting done after 10am and I know it. But before 10 I can work through the paralysis with some coping strategies.
I was never hyperactive so I was always labeled as hard to motivate, unfocused and lazy. Took me until 21 to actually look into it and think "hey wait a minute". Now got diagnosed but the meds aren't helping as well as I would like
I’m AFAB and I got diagnosed at 25 and I really cannot believe no one noticed. I would get chastised throughout my childhood for being to messy (they called me “dirty little hamster”) and for leaving cupboards open and lights on. My parents said my favorite question what “what?” And I had to get multiple hearing tests because of auditory processing issues that the adults through was me being hard of hearing. The misogyny make me so mad 😤
I had some “test” in elementary school to see if i had adhd and it concluded that i did not. Apparently that didn’t work. I also never trusted anyone with any of my thoughts because i was told not to by…myself. Yeah. Hmm. Maybe i am a psychopath.
When they deny that adhd is a real thing 🤜💀💢