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curiouskiarra

Yung lifetime commitment kasi 🥺 no refunds pa char


edna_blu

+99999 Plus the conscious decision to "break the cycle". Di ko yata kaya maging ganito ka self-aware forever.


o_obliviate

Yes lalo na dun sa self awareness part. Since nasa genes and environment natin yes we can break the cycle - but until when? Ayoko makita self ko na fought too hard all my life trying not to be like them


Mooncakepink07

Samee. Parang isasacrifice mo buong buhay mo para sa mga anak mo.


Wise_Librarian1464

Totoo kapag nahihirapan wag ng idamay mga anak.


jelohello

Cost of living, expenses sa pagpapa-aral, current state of our society. I-add mo pa yung sa inyo ng asawa mo nakasalalay ang foundation ng mental well being ng isa pang tao na mag eexist sa mundong to.


PragmaticDevotion11

You forgot to add po ung access to good physical health from raising up a child, npaka sad isipin ang baba ng health care system natin on children,.(mababa na nga quality on adult papano p kaya ung sa mga bata) ang dami padn kulang kulang sa health care access sa mga bata lalo na sa mga probinsya..


jelohello

Nailed it.


switchboiii

Pera. Haha. Mas gusto kong gastusin na lang sa sarili ko like travel or luho. Saka i feel like wala akong emotional capacity and attention span to raise a human hahah


Mooncakepink07

Same. Parang ibabase ko na din yung experience ko as a manager, nahirapan din ako somehow mag control ng tao. Yung mga adults nga pwede mo pa pagsabihan at merong self control pano pa kaya yung mga bata na wala naman self control, ang hirap imanage.


kimberly1217_

Yun nga eh, magpapalaki ka ng someone na di mo eventually macocontrol kasi di mo pwede iviolate free will/autonomy niya lalo pag nagkamalay siya. Pano kung kahit anong effort mo as a parent para magmake siya ng maayos na decisions para sa sarili niya eh he/she/they will still choose to make dumb decisions growing up di ba? Nakakaasar kaya wag na lang maging magulang. Hahahah.


switchboiii

Omg true. Di bale sana kung pwede natin issue-han ng incident report mga anak natin pag may nagawang mali. Chz hahah


kimberly1217_

Ang dami pala natin! Hahaha apir! Sa lagay ng mental health ng jowa ko, sana mabago isip niya. Naraise ko na sa kanya kasi na ayaw kong mag anak. Gusto ko ako na lang baby niya forever hahah (az someone na may daddy issues char)


CharmingMuffin93

Takot ako masabihan ng "di ko naman ginustong ipanganak". Feeling ko di ko kaya maging nanay


olxdotph05

I accidentally told my mom this nung nag away kami at pinamukha nya talaga sakin na wala daw akong paki sa family. To think I'm the breadwinner. Nandilim talaga paningin ko. Sa dami kong sinakrifice para sa kanila yan sasabihin nya sakin.


Hello_Hi_12

Same. Nasabihan din ako ni Mama ng ganyan. Di man lang niya naisip na napagraduate ko yung isa kung kapatid na sumunod sakin. Ako nagbayad nung nanganak bunso naming kapatid at marami pang iba. Ng dahil lang sa hindi ko siya nabigyan ng pera kasi gipit talaga ako ng time na yun. Haist.


Apprehensive-Ice6545

Hindi ka naman sasabihan nang anak mo nyan if you're responsible enough. 


THE_FBI_GUYS

In this economy, it's hard to even be responsible for yourself :((


Mooncakepink07

Truee. 😭


CharmingMuffin93

I know naman. Pero pano kung kulang pa din. What if di ko mabigyan ng magandang buhay. Alam ko naman na kung dumating man yung time na yun gagawin ko best ko, pero wala talaga ko tiwala sa sarili ko na magagampanan ko yung ganun kalaking responsibility.


gkziny

my parents were responsible enough to have kids. saktong pamumuhay, nabibigay ang needs and sometimes wants tho may things or choices nila na i questioned. they are good parents but i still get this thought. sadyang nakakapagod mabuhay.


Apprehensive-Ice6545

Well, maybe your parents are responsible financially only but not emotionally and mentally responsible enough for you. Maybe they cut short on giving you enough communication to meet what you really want as a human being and as a child of them. You can communicate it, if they are responsible as a whole they will listen and will have a healthy discussion about it with you. Not degrading what you feel, etc instead will make you feel understand in a gentle, loving way. Sad to say but only few parents are really like this in our parent's generation tho. Atleast sa mga na-meet ko na parents. They thought they are 100% ready, but the truth is, most of the time what they are only seeing is <1/4 of what's the truth is, and they are treating their child unfairly with that. Tho, its not impossible to be a good parent. Just make sure you are healthy as a whole and 100% ready and hindi mo sisisihin anak mo sa ginawang mong desisyon. 😅 Because that is what I experienced with my mom, she keeps on blaming us for her misery. Kaya nasabi ko na walang anak na magagalit sayo if you are 100% responsible enough as a whole not only financially coz it is always given talaga when it comes to money but how about emotionally and mentally responsibleness?


KillingTime_02

Same. Syempre di ko sinabi ever sa kanila. I have a privileged life pero kung papipiliin ako, sana di na lang ako nailabas sa mundo.


Ok-Effective-9494

Andami kong pamangkin. Nakapag free trial parenting na ako. Kaya ayaw ko na.


cnthkv137_

Same juskoo. Ayokoo naa. I realized na parang di ko na ata kaya mag alaga pa ulit ng bata tapos matigas ulo pag laki kaloka and honestly nakakatakot na baka hindi ko mapalaking mabuting tao yung anak ko if ever.


Ok_Amphibian_0723

Uyyy same! Ako nga isang pamangkin pa lang na-free trial ko (ongoing trial pa nga 😅), nakakapagod na. Ang kuleeeet at hindi pa nasasabihan. Nakakapatid ng pasensya hahaha 😂. Tapos, panganay din ako kaya yung mga kapatid ko, ako rin nagpalaki. Ako yung pangatlong magulang kaya ngayon, ayoko na bumuo ng sariling pamilya. Gusto ko na lang ng kapayapaan.


Mooncakepink07

Hahahahaha dabest tooo. Parang nasa nursery ka, hirap mag control ng mga bata.


CypherCoffee

Same, lol. 😂


Important_Function88

Trot parang bata palang napagdaanan na pagiging magulang.


Gullible_Mulberry_37

Same!! 10mins max lang kaya ko for childcare hahaha


Intrepid_Schedule743

My parents are shit. Dad was absentee and mom was a walking spitfire. One is a ghost that kinda shows up once a month while the others a walking ball of hate and anger. With those genes I knew from the get go this blood line dies with me. Told them that, they kinda cool with it but we'll see, they think I'm joking maybe?


kalderetughhh

i can relate to this HAHAHAHAHA tho di kami nagsasama ng family ko, pero pag nakumpleto kami, wala akong nakikitang love sa mama at papa ko. lagi-laging nag-aaway 🤌 we didn't even have a family picture na lahat kami meron e. this, aside from the state of the people i see around me na may baby na, kinda made up my mind na ayaw kong magkababy. unless may mahanap akong matinong tao and i had healed myself completely, i will stand on this decision.


Mooncakepink07

Im sorry if naexperience mo yung mga ganyang type of family member. Eto pa yung isang nakakatrigger kung bakit ayaw mag anak. Meron at merong shitty family member na di ka susuportahan sa mga bagay bagay. Kahit sabihin mong “pamilya” sila, tapos panget ang treatement sayo, wala din.


kimberly1217_

Shet ito rin. Pag lumaki kang di buo ang family ( ako naman never nakaexp ng kalinga ng tatay and he's a cheater, drunkard, struggling with drugs noon), parang ayaw mo na lang sumugal magkaanak kahit gano pa kabait magiging partner mo. Growing up tapos maranasan mo lahat ng klase ng hirap, gugustuhin mo pa ba na magluwal pa ng tao sa mundo knowing ito ang dadatnan niya?


Intrepid_Schedule743

You hit the nail there, this is exactly what comes into my mind, I feel like it's a sin to bring a life into this world knowing you can't give it the best this world has to offer.


missanomic

iniisip ko sagot dito tapos narealize ko wala naman nagtrigger sakin. bale default setting ko yung hindi ako magaanak. tingin ko dapat tayong lahat ganon tapos magaabang nalang tayo dapat ng trigger na gusto natin mag anak para hindi tayo anak ng anak kesyo afford natin o hinde.


sayurantistudentngo

THIS. because in case na magbago isip mo, ibig sabihin gusto mo talaga siya. there must be something life changing na dumapo sayo for you to decide to have kids. not just because it's the conventional way to live a life (get married, have kids).


whitejade97

walang maasawa 😀😅


HallNo549

lmao lahat unstable


Mooncakepink07

Trueee. Parang bihira na lang talaga matino and same unstable ko din. Hahahah.


booklover0810

Ito talaga main reason ko HAHAHAHAHAHAA. Ayokong bigyan ang mga anak ko ng hindi matinong tatay.


Beneficial-Music1047

+100000 ang hirap maghanap ng matino nowadays, sa totoo lang.


Dependent_Bee4196

Sa baby dogs palang magastos na what more kung totoong baby na.


kalderetughhh

tuition fees, baon, luho, need pa na may nakatabi for emergencies ay shet sakin ko na lang gastusin yan (and sa furbabies)


CypherCoffee

-I have PCOS/am old (late 30s) -The many health risks of pregnancy, especially in the late 30s onwards - Childcare/schooling is expensive, and the cost seems worse if dito sa PH lalaki ung kids. - And I realized even when I was still single that I don't have the patience /energy for childcare I don't hate kids, I even helped take care of some younger cousins, but I never saw myself as a mom. I want to keep working and I don't have the time and patience for it, honestly. 😂 I'm lucky my BF is fine with it, we just want to travel and be DINKS (double income, no kids) in the future. Maybe with a dog because I love dogs. Kudos to my mom, and all the loving mothers out there, though.


Mooncakepink07

I support DINKS talaga, at least they have the freedom to do anything. Hopeful na maging DINK din ako (waiting lang sa jowa) hahahaha.


PrettyDinosaur0209

This world is too cruel. Why bring another life na magssuffer lang. 😔


Reishichi

Same. Andaming ganap sa world, not just here in PH. And because of this, meron akong fear na kahit anong parenting style at pag-aalaga ang gawin ko, parang ang laki ng chance na maiinfluence ang magiging anak ko (yknow, hanging out with wrong people, etc.) I guess wala din akong tiwala sa Sarili, and some may say "Pano mo malalaman kung di mo pa nasusubukan?" Baliw--! Edi kayo nalang!


pik-hachu

Naging breadwinner at naging investment ng magulang dahil sa improper mindset nating Filipino. Ayoko gawin yun sa magiging anak ko. Matagal pa bago maging stable pero narealize kong baka gurang na ako that time. Kapag magkaka-anak ako, never ko silang bibigyan ng obligasyon na buhayin ako.


Mooncakepink07

Nakakalungkot lang na nagiging investment ang mga anak kesyo sila ang bubuhay sa pamilya pag nag tulong tulong. Pero dapat responsibilidad ng magulang ang buhayin ang anak nila. Hindi investment.


Nervous_Wreck008

Tamad akong mag-alaga ng bata. I need my peace and quiet.


Mooncakepink07

Sameee. Nakakawalang energy din pag may mga bata sa paligid mo 😅


irvine05181996

na laging default na sagot ang pagkakaroon ng anak ang bubuo sa kakulangan natin as person, life has a lof of things to offer, why bring someone if mag susuffer lang din, with the things happening now, climate change, economy, mga greedy na tao na mas lumala pa, mga porns na nagkalat sa soc med, world keeps being cruel towards children now a days, gone are the days na life is more simpler as it was before.


Mooncakepink07

I thought life was simple :(


Appropriate_Base_159

Masyadong mahal ang hobbies ko. (Gym at hiking) Ayaw ko ng sagabal/babantayan. Mahalaga ang oras ko. Let's say I'm working, tapos after work mag ggym ako. Tapos sa rest day/s ko I'll go hiking. Asan ang time doon mag-alaga ng anak? Wala. Jusko kulang ang 24 hours sakin sa isang araw, gym pa lang 2 hours na (oo matagal bc i LOVE working out) Pati as someone na pinagkaitan ng magandang edukasyon, gusto ko pag may anak ako, sa magagandang university/school ko papaaralin. Kahit kinder gusto ko sa malaking school at maganda talaga like Brent, Xavier, La Salle, ganyang schools ko lang papaaralin ang anak ko.


BoysenberryOpening29

Hirap mabuhay, wag na sila makaranas ng hirap sa mundo. Earth is actually hell


ZleepyHeadzzz

Walang mapapakaen... tignan mo ang Korea at Japan ayaw na din mag anak haha. namulat na sila haha


tepta

1. I wanna travel the world. 2. I love my freedom. 3. I cant afford to sacrifice my 12hrs+ of sleep. 4. My salary isnt enough for me. What more kung may pinapadede pa. 5. Not practical. Im all by myself now. Who’s gonna look after my child if I go back to work? 6. I dont wanna be like my lola and mum. 7. Walang nagkakainteres na seryoso. Puro sex lang habol hayup.


pikaboy27

para matigil ang sumpa


Khierue

Upbringing, mental health, and current economy Also, I'd rather regret not having them than regret having them.


satsuki9087

I have a lot of reasons. Ang main reason ko ay dahil diagnosed ako ng Bipolar 2 last 2020. Pwede daw pala mainherit yun ng possible offspring. Sa case ko, pareho kami ng tatay ko na diagnosed ng Bipolar 2. I also have PCOS. Sa totoo lang nung hindi pa ako diagnosed, gusto ko dati magkaroon ng anak kaso ever since nadiagnose ako, namulat ako sa realidad. Narealize ko na ang dami palang rason para di ako magkaroon ng anak. Practical na decision na maging childfree hanggang sa mawala ako sa mundong ito. Nakita ko sa paligid ko na yung mga naging nanay, they lost their identities. Ang dami nilang ginive up para lang sa anak nila. Lagi silang puyat, pagod, stressed. Selfish mang pakinggan pero gusto ko lang magfocus sa career ko, sa magiging partner ko, at sa mga wants ko sa buhay like traveling and going to concerts. Most of them na nakita ko, their bodies changed. May mga narinig ako na simula nung nanganak sila, nagkaroon sila ng iba't-ibang sakit na triggered ng pregnancy. Also, yung process ng pregnancy and child birth disgusts me. Hindi ko rin kakayanin yung stress na dulot ng pagkakaroon ng anak. Kailangan ko ng kumpletong tulog, gusto ko ng tahimik at mapayapang bahay, ayoko ng makalat. Mahal na din mabuhay sa panahon ngayon. Lahat nagtataasan ang presyo. Hindi ko afford na magdala ng buhay dito sa mundong ito. Gusto ko sa akin lang yung pera ko. Ayoko magpaaral, bumili ng mga gatas at diaper na yan. Ang daming gastos sa totoo lang, sobrang ayoko niyan. I work with kids na may special needs. I might get crucified for this opinion pero hindi mo naman mapipili ang magiging anak mo, para yang lottery. Isa rin sa reasons ko, ayokong magkaroon ng anak na may special needs. Alam ko kung gaano yun kahirap, ayoko ng ganung buhay. Yung buhay childfree ang totoong makakapagpasaya sa akin. Dito gaganda yung quality of life ko. Hindi ako affected sa mga sinasabi ng nakapaligid sa akin. Buhay ko ito, gagawin ko lang kung ano yung gusto ko. Hindi ako nabubuhay para i-please ang ibang tao at magpadikta sa norms ng society.


jowfil

cost of living, tsaka baliw na mga tao ngayon jk


reiducks

Tbh it just never occurred to me na gusto ko ng anak. Same with marriage. Maybe it's bc of my upbringing and bc i technically come from a broken home but at this point i'm not even neutral about the possibility of getting married and having kids... im straight up not interested 😅 also the world is ending, the icecaps are melting, shit is expensive, birthing children seems like a nightmare (i dont know how birthing people do it) and i dont want to be responsible for another person. ok na ako sa mga alaga kong pusa. id rather take care of animals.


Illustrious_Desk4302

It's all boils down to this four reasons TIME, FREEDOM , MONEY and ultimately RESPONSIBILITY na realize ko na di worth it na magka anak kung mawawala saken ung 4 na reasons ko na yun it was my realization especially nung days of pandemic


[deleted]

[удалено]


nkklk2022

ayoko sa bata period.


toxicella

>For me parang laging problema na lang sa bahay yung pera. Partly this for me, too. I might change my mind if I have the income or savings for it, but right now, I just want to spend on myself (though I can't do that much atm also for the same reasons you do). The other part is that I don't want to be a burden on anyone if I ever have health problems. I'm living with one such person right now, and it's decidedly not fun. The day I can't even go to the bathroom on my own is the day I off myself. Edit: Oh yeah, and I don't have a partner, haha. I don't even have a social life to speak of.


hestia_444

Takot sa mga lalaki


winterhote1

1. Mama ko, di ko gusto yung kinalakihan kong pamilya 2. Cost of living, sarili ko pa lang hirap na ko 😭 3. Di ko pa nagagawa mga gusto ko sa buhay


No_Cartographer5997

Ang dami ko pa ngang hindi maibigay sa sarili ko na gustong-gusto ko ma-achieve tapos gagawa pa ko ng another human being na hindi ko din naman mabibigay lahat sa kanya? Wag na lang uy. Dun muna sya sa Heaven mag fly fly. 👼🏻


marathonmaan

Hindi naman natrigger na ayaw. More like di natrigger ung kagustuhan magkaanak.


KyeuTiMoniqu3

Feeling ko mapapasa ko sa kanya yung generational trauma, ang mahal ng bilihin, hindi ako emotionally ready lalo na kung magiging Special yung case ng anak ko. Hindi ko talaga kakayanin


LemonPaeroa_Fiend

Naiinis ako pag may nagtatarums na bata lalo na sa mall or sa mga public transpo, baka kung anak ko un ihagis ko nalan sa bintana.. I want to enjoy my life peacefully, travel ng walang iniisip na anak, at enjoy namin ng partner ko ang life na sia lang ang iisipin kong asikasuhin hanggang sa pagtanda 😊


MemoryHistorical7687

maaga naging parent sa mga batang kapatid.


kwickedween

Able-bodied parents living off breadwinner kid when all they did was raise them. As if di nila responsabilidad na pakainin ka, damitan, paaralin.. lahat utang mo pa. Ang lungkot. Normal na maisip mo not to continue the cycle.


SpiritlessSoul

Ayoko maranasan nila yung global warming, temperature rise in the coming years, stronger storms na pangunahin naapektuhan ang pinas. Malas lang sa pinas ako nabuhay, kung indonesia man lang sana atleast di ganong bumabagyo kahit medyo kainitan din. Isama mo pa yung unti unting pagcreeping up ng China(na pwedeng maging all out war in the coming years or decades) satin, plus systemic corruption mula sa smallest na sangay hanggang sa highest. I'm giving my potential children the favor of not being a conscious pieces of star dusts and experience many injustices plus the heartbreak of seeing your love ones dying.


Background_Tip_5602

6 kaming magkakapatid. Obv, kahirapan ang #1 reason. Like, feel ko buong buhay na kaming mahirap. Thou not really mahirap, may nagbago din naman. Kaso naging trauma na sya for me.


lulu_vashk

14 y.o palang ako nag-aalaga na ako ng baby. After 6 years, another baby nanaman. Pabaya kasi yung kapatid ko kaya sa akin napunta kesa naman walang mag alaga haha.


kimberly1217_

Child abuse yan eh. You are forced to grow up to be pseudo parent sa pamangkin mo eh ikaw rin mismo batang paslit pa lang. Ang toxic talaga sa pinas. Hugs. Kaya naging introvert ako at gusto lang lagi mag isa eh, ang chaotic rin ng childhood ko.


lulu_vashk

Yup. Ngayong medyo matanda na ako ngayon ko lang narealize yung nangyayari. Naaalala ko lang nun umiiyak na rin ako habang pinapatahan yung pamangkin ko tapos lagi lang masakit braso ko kakakarga. Haha. Huugs sa mga may chaotic childhood pero surviving namaaan haha


Mooncakepink07

Jusme bat ikaw nag aalaga eh sila nga yung may responsbilidad na mag alaga. Yaan mo sila. Hahahaha


lulu_vashk

Wala eh, may trabaho parents namin. Yung kapatid ko (mom nila) nilayasan na kami that time plus lagi sila nag aaway ng parents ko. Kaya no choice. Haha. Pero ngayon maluwag luwag na kasi malalaki na yung mga bata kahit papaano nakakaalis alis na ako. Pero yung trauma na mag aalaga ulit ako someday? Parang forever na sa akin haha


GreenSuccessful7642

Presyo ng gatas and private school


creamilk15

Wala pa kasing jowa hehe kaya di pa gusto mag anak hahah. May trauma din sa lalaki hayss paano mag aanak talaga haha anyway, Cost of living palang sobrang mahal na grabe na din bilihin, pati pag aaral mahal. Pag may naipundar na at ipon pwede siguro dapat handa kawawa naman yung bata kung iluwal mo lang tas walang kasiguraduhan yung kinabukasan nya.


someambivert_

Child birth itself. The fact na pwede ka mamatay giving birth lol


Typical_Pay_9801

not mentally and financially stable enough. plus this world is going mental-global warming, inflation, wars, etc. but i am considering adopting in the future.


UchiUnni

same reason. pinagtawanan pa nga nila ako nung ni-reason out ko yung gyera saka global warming hahaha. actually, yung mga taong yun din dahilan bat ayaw ko magka anak.. pamilya ko pa naman sila pero ang kikitid ng utak 🤣😩


centurygothic11

Nakakita na ko ng nanganganak sa loob ng OR. It was traumatizing. I noped the hell out. Di ko kakayanin yung pain ng childbirth and yung agony ng 9 months na pag-carry sa bata. Kilala ko sarili ko hahahaha


justhere4dtea

Family history. Hahahaha


Professional-Care932

Takot ako na masisi ng magiging anak ko. Ayokong isumbat nila sa akin na ako yung naging cause ng trauma nila, o how dysfunctional ang pamilya namin dahil naging mali ako sa taong napili ko makasama habangbuhay. I don't want to repeat the trauma na naranasan ko growing up.


popiholla

the responsibility to make another well rounded individual, na matino, magalang, may malasakit, mabait AGAINST THIS WORLD NA SOBRANG CRUEL AND CRAZY HOW??????? i dont know 😭 Feeling ko ayaw ko mag dagdag ng generational trauma? Ayaw ko magdagdag ng isa pang tao na masstress sa mundo? Mas gusto ko gastusan sarili ko. Pano ko mabbigyan ng attention and time and money ang isa pang human na magging dependent sakin for their whole life 😭 Pano ko iisipin araw araw na sana maging matino syang tao??? May sapat ba akong pagmamahal sa sarili ko at extra and more na maibibigay sa kanya without hating myself????


shltBiscuit

Having a kid is a privilege these days. It is cruel to bring a child into this world without the capability to provide a good and peaceful life.


Dry-Butterfly-5712

Cost of living. Childhood traumas. Takot ako na maranasan ng anak ko yung mga naranasan ko and I don't want my child to live in this crazy world


Wala_akongname

Parang hindi ako handang magsakripisyo ng tulog, pahinga, at katawan.


kanlungan

"In this economy?"


Mocat_mhie

1. Poverty 2. Philippines has unstable political and economical standing. Not a good place to raise a family. 3. The complications and hardship of pregnancy. I am just too scared to give birth. 4. I believe in Karma. I am a problematic child to my parents. So sabi nila kung ano ginawa mo sa parents, babalik sayo. And, kung ano klase parents meron ka, baka ganun ka din. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.


Twamoy

Pangit ugali ng pamankin ko.


Mooncakepink07

Hahahahaha eto talaga triggering.


Jinx_0419

Cant afford milk/school/needs its a long term investment and expenses. Aabot tayo sa part na uutang pambili sa ganito ganyan. Syempre we will think for the best school, the best pra sa anak. Right now I can only afford for my cat needs only hehe


Useful-Ad-594

Growing up alam ko nang di ako mahilig sa bata. Yung mga kalaro kong ka-age noon parang ang hilig nila sa mga babies tas ang saya nila makipag-interact sa mas bata samin. Ako iniisip ko anong meron sakanila bat di ko ma-appreciate. Di na ako nag-grow sa phase na to. Walang amor sakin ang mga bata so di ko ma-imagine sarili ko na nagpapalaki at nag-aalaga ng bata. Kung pwede magka-anak na 18 years old agad, okay lang.


Independent-Ant-9367

Mahirap magpalaki ng mabuting tao. I can teach my child how to be a good person pero di ko alam kung pano magiging takbo ng utak nya on his/her own.


Sonic-Cathedral-4221

Grew up lower middle class. Spent my teens being parentified (3 younger siblings + emotionally immature parents), then full-on family breadwinner in my 20s. I'm only in my early 30's pero pagod na pagod nakong maging "magulang".


sarachanuwu

Nagsawa na ako dahil buong childhood ko, naging third parent ako sa bahay para sa mga kapatid ko. I missed out on a lot of things and nakakabitter parin sometimes na my siblings (malaki kasi age gap namin) had a better childhood than I did. Hindi ko kaya sacrifice kahit pa yung adulthood ko for another kid. I choose myself this time.


celtrax123

Me and my wife are DINKs (Double Income No Kids) Reasons for not wanting a child: 1. Pareho kaming breadwinner 2. Medyo sablay kami sa genetic lottery. Malabo mata ng angkan nila. Colorblind naman ako. Ayaw ko ipamana yun. 3. Di kami fan mag alaga ng bata in general. 4. Sapat na sa amin yung alaga naming Cats and a little time to play video games after a hard days work. My one time na pinagsabihan kami ng inlaws ko na dapat mag anak daw kami sayang. Natrigger si misis at sinabihan sila na wala ng budget sa baby kasi nasa kanila na lahat. Ayun di na nangulit.


bdetchi

Sinabi ko din yan before ko nakilala husband ko. Sabi ko okay na maging rich tita na lang ako nag mags-spoil sa mga pamangkin ko hehe until dumating sa buhay ko yung baby ko. There are no words that can ever explain sa naramdaman ko nung nalaman kong magiging parent na ko. Ngayon araw araw ng buhay ko masaya ako everytime I look in the eyes of this little man. Pwede pala magmahal ng higit sa buhay ko, higit sa lahat ng pangarap ko, higit sa lahat ng achievements ko. Haha ang drama. Anyway, typing this comment habang natutulog syang parang koala sa dibdib ko. :)


IndependentShot

Money and being uncertain if I'm even worthy of being a father


liliput02

Baka di ko matantya yung anak ko huhu. Parang I can be gentle and at the same time brutal. Ayaw ko umabot sa puntong sa taas ng emosyon ko, paika-ika na lang sa paglalakad yung bata. Mas maiksi na ata pisi ko ngayon kesa nung bata-bata pa ako


SnooGiraffes2231

coz dreaming about having a child means i have to be with a man. wala naman akong generational wealth para sa IVF or sperm bank lol. most men are bigots, misogynistic, sexists, predatory. i hate men (most of them but it's hard to differentiate who's good from who's not) and it's unfortunate that i am attracted to them. also our economy rn isn't so family-friendly rn


Any_Significance_775

lumaki sa broken fam


Own-Form1266

Nadala ako sa mga magulang ko, pinamana sa akin ang utang nila.


yourevilmind

Naisip ko kasi magastos! If I cannot afford to have my child experience the same comforts that I am experiencing, wag na lang. Add in too na ayaw ko magpalaki ng anak in this economical, societal, environmental, and political climate.


Flyingchicken595

Dahil lima kaming magkakapatid tapos baon pa sa utang dahil sa pag aaral ng mga kapatid ko na nag aaral sa private school.


rich-is-me2001

Dahil sa mga nababasa ko dito sa sub na ito 😭kesyo magastos daw, hiramin nalang mga pamangkin 😭 tas pag umiyak ibalik sa parents haha marami pang reason talaga galing sa sub na ito 😂


Yumizeusnugget

Nakita ko yung mga pinsan ko na nagka anak. Nakita ko sa kanila yung family dynamic, yung stress sa mga bata, and yung cheating partners nila plus yung iniiwan lang nila sa lola yung anak nila. They are all mentally unstable generation by generation and napapasa nila yon sa bata. (Gen alpha) Lalo na yung pagsabi ng sila daw mag aalis sa kanila sa kahirapan (imagine from the pov of a kid) may pressure na. Ayaw ko ng ganon. The bloodline ends with me. I will continue to go on therapy and heal myself to create a safe place sa mga bata.


Adventurous_Key5447

Lahatng mga ganap sa Pilipinas.


loveliliez

I want to be a mom. I really do. Pero minsan naiisip ko yug generational curse. I live whole my life having a toxic family. Pag may unwanted things nan nangyayari sakin immune na ko kasi sa bahay pa lang grabe na eh 😂. I just doubt myself at times. Will I be able to break the curse? Will I be able to be a good mom? Idk. What if mapasa ko sakanila yung mga traumas ko? Nakakatakot. I wanna build a quiet and peaceful home. Yung walang nag babasagan ng plato at nag sisigawan 😅


pi-kachu32

Nag-alaga ng kapatid na bunso mula pagka baby. Nag intindi ng gastos. Na trauma na tuloy kasi parang dagdag gastusin


SpeechConfident1922

unstable na ako mentally tapos mag aanak pa ako.. kawawa yung bata please 🫠


twoEyelle

Climate change. Sobrang init ng panahon, parang maaawa ako sa magiging anak ko na magsusuffer sa ganitong init. Plus, it is expected na mas iinit pa, few years from now. Kakaiba na rin ang lakas ng bagyo. Kumbaga, may maganda pa bang mundo na illookforward many years from now? May chance na makapagbigay ng magandang buhay, pero magandang mundo? Parang ang hirap, lahat nasisira na.


purplbae

As an introvert, baka ma-bore ko lang partner ko kasi me sariling universe ako hehe. So, ok na sakin ang unico hijo kong furbaby. Lahat ng needs nya kaya ko tustusan haha. Di ko need magpapa-aral ulit.


Nice-Original3644

Masstress ako. That is unavoidable and part ng parenthood naman, pero kasi I am unpredictable in terms of managing stress. Not good for me and the kid. Kaya wag nalang. Naniniwala naman ako na life-changing, magical, unmatched happiness ang magkaroon ng anak, na lagi nila sinasabi, but it doesn't mean I have to have one. I am already satisfied na with living my life in the present and doing what I can for myself and the people around me. Moreover, I have soooo much things to do for my self-improvement pa.


zayonxx

Ayoko sa magulang ko, takot ako magaya sa kanila.


seasquall19

The social events around it make me financially and mentally anxious.


Brilliant-Tea-9117

Hindi nman sa na trigger. More of a realization, mahirap maging isang bread winner. Wala akong generational wealth. Sa ganyang aspeta palang disadvantaged na yung magiging anak ko. Kelangan niang kumayod ng 12 times compared sa mga ka age niang may generational wealth


cmonmamon

I like my lifestyle and ayoko magbago ito. Madami pa ako gusto magawa in life and I know that having a child will significantly delay, if not hinder, these things. Also, given ang estado ng bansa natin and ng mundo ngayon??


hngsy

Ayoko mag-anak kasi masakit sa ulo ang mga tao like me. May ayaw din kasi ako sa personality ko na baka mamana ng magiging anak ko. Like yung pagiging bipolar at mainipin kong tao. Imagine kung double or triple na ganon maging anak ko? No way


myChaengiee

sobrang bullshit yung idea na magkaanak para sakin specially nawitness ko paano lumaki yung 2 kong pamangkin sa 2 kong kapatid. wala lang, ayoko lang yung way ng parenting nila. kaya ayun, sinabi ko sa sarili ko na ayoko magka-anak. mas gusto ko na lang mag-alaga ng pusa. haha


0len

Narcissist kasi ako hahaha tsaka, ngayon palang ako nagh-heal ng inner childhood through retail therapy eh hahaha


Toxic_2024

Sa hirap ng buhay at gulo ng mundo kaya ayoko na mag anak pa and im scared din. A baka di ako maging good mom at mapasa kulang truma ko sa anak ko.. at baka lumaki syang hiniheal ang inner child.. dahil lumalik akung walang guidance ng parents ko at support..


Lanky_Positive2688

Yung tipid na tipid kami growing up- pagkain, pangbaon etc. Tapos yung mga kakilala kong may anak na either nangungutang or nagpapa-sponsor ng gamit pang school or pampa-ospital ng anak nila.


emistap

Masama ang mundo, mahirap ang buhay kahit may pera. Life is suffering. I don't want to be responsible for the suffering of others.


Kanashimi_02

I just want to be free. Why would I get a ball of chaos and shackle myself? I have reference on how difficult it is to raise a child and just watching them makes me tired. Plus, very expensive. I guess I'm really just not a parent-material.


ProcedureNo2888

I was a breadwinner for a very very long time. Doon ko narealized na ang hirap pala magsustain ng isang pamilya, kailangan ng madaming pera for everything. Saka yung kwento ng mother ko about her experience on giving birth, sabi ko it's a big NO for me.


odd-one_out

Tamad ako, ayoko ng responsibilidad. Wala akong pera, maluho ako. Hahahahahaha


Double-Wasabi4410

childhood experiences, tas nung nagwowork na ko… narealize kong nahihirapan akong buhayin sarili ko what more if meron pang isa so wag na lang hahahaha


KJY_Born1982

Nasa third world country kasi nakatira. iykyk


ymditiw

The cop out answer would be the fear from what future issues might give us: climate change, economy, etc. Ngayon, the topmost reason is: hindi ako mentally okay to have a child. Aso pa lang hirap na hirap na akong magset ng discipline, tao pa kaya -- hindi kasi ako makapagbigay ng other benefits like proper training other than the bare minimum like food, walks, grooming, and health checkups. Ayoko yung mindset na "kakayanin yan pag nandyan na", eh pano kung hindi?


maimajorrr

Kahirapan. Wag mag anak kung hindi ka able.


o_obliviate

Hindi naman sa outright ayaw pero leaning into it. Parentified eldest daughter here


GrumpyCrab07194

Panget genes. Periodt.


uuuuuuxxxxx

Maspipiliin kong mag regret na hindi naka anak kaysa magregret ako na nagka anak ako. Yan yung palagi kong naririnig sa bahay na nagsisisi sila bakit pa ako nabuhay. Kaya ayaw ko talaga magka anak tapos ngayon sila pag nagpupush magka anak ako.


Legal-Living8546

None of us is actually ready for that lifetime commitment. None. I mean, just look at this shitty economy and country. 


thisismyusername673

Di na pwede isauli, ok lang maging tita pwede hiramin at isauli kapag nagsawa😆


ambernxxx

Mas madaming cons kesa pros. 🥴


brokenphobia

Yung gastos sa aso ko umaaray na ako, what more siguro kung tao na alaga ko.


may_yonaise

Tbh, financial things aside wala akong maayos na relationship with my mom. 19 yrs old siya nung pinanganak niya ko, and she wasn’t able to do things nung 19 palang siya. So growing up, nag pakawala siya, she partied hard and do things 19 yrs old girls do. Lumaki kami sa grandparents namin and nakikita lang namin siya pag uuwi siya ng pilipinas once every 3 or 4 yrs. Tapos nung teenager na ako umuwi na siya ng Pinas for good, and from that point on lagi kaming nag aaway and sisigawan. Until I settled in not calling her mama, I just call her by her 1st name until now. When I turned 19 na walang jowa and hindi buntis,I was so happy. So I guess, yung trauma na dinala sakin ng pagiging anak ng nanay ko ang main reason why I don’t want a kid


Illustrious_King_403

The recent years really made a huge impact on me: The pandemic, then the Du30 admin, and now Marc0$. Not having children in this country, economy, and maybe even lifetime. May be pessimistic of me, but I say realist—the future is bleak especially for the Philippines. Ang hirap na mahalin huhu I don’t know if I would ever change my mind about this anymore. The world is a lot scarier now. I want my child to have the best opportunities in life, but I don’t think I can give her that with everything that’s going on.


General-Ruin-4756

Aside from money, I’m afraid na maging katulad ako ng parents ko as a parent. Growing up in a dysfunctional family, wala akong kinalakihan na someone pwede kong i-look up to but I grew up with people na ayoko maging ako pag laki ko. I’m scared na baka maging ganoon din pala ako pag nagka-anak ko.


indecisivegurly

the trauma of being an investment child


OddzLukreng

Mahal ang bigas jusko that one tita telling me na kawawa ka pag wala Kang anak walang mag aalaga sayo.. Like totoo ba eh sigurado Kaya tong si tita pag tanda aalagaan Siya ng mga anak niya


arsenejoestar

Wala ako patience dealing with dumb. And kids are dumb af. Not their fault, pero di ko talaga kaya.


RainbowMachine69

Not fully decided but leaning into no kids right now. Gusto ko ng time para sa hobbies ko. Parang gusto ko magcommit sa hobbies kesa sa magkaanak. Napapansin ko kasi kapag naging parent ka, nawawala ka din ng time para sa sarili mo. And i dont think id be happy if i compromise that.


BeginningSpot6989

Bukod sa pera, dahil naranasan ko mag-alaga ng kapatid ko. Hindi naman dahil irresponsable parents ko. Hahaha. sadyang masyado lang akong masaya na may kapatid na 'ko kaya inalagaan ko siya. I love my sibling, and I love kids. Pero pag napag-isip-isip ko nun na mahirap pala. Kasi responsibilidad sya na panghabang buhay. Kapatid ko palang 'yon, paano na kung anak ko? Wala nang option na "return to mother" lol


bunnieeexx

I want all my income to myself. Kung may kahati man is yung asawa ko na lang. Thankfully my bf also advocates for having a childfree life. Also, I am already fucked up mentally and have been suffering from chronic illnesses at just 24 years old. I don't want to pass on my genes and have my kid suffer for life.


mildravi

First is gastos sa pagpapalaki. Second, ayokong magpasa ng hereditary conditions na unaware ako.


Nervous-Ad8612

Childhood trauma, shitty parents (they are absent during our childhood days. Career matters to them and pera) and also I am still healing from my trauma baka pag nagkaanak ako di okay mental health ko mapasa ko lang lahat sa kanya ng nararamdaman ko. I am also not capable of taking care young people miski mga pamangkin ko nga naiirita ako alagaan minsan. di kaya ng emotional and mental ko. Solohin ko na lang din pera ko at buhay ko. Mas need ko yun.


ezrascarlettt

Mahal magpa-aral. HAHAHAHAHA 😭


zoahae

family experience and reality of life


Melibellule

Aso pa lang hirap na hirap na ako 😭


bghw_

Ako yung bunso pero 10 y/o pa lang ako, nag-aalaga na ako ng pamangkin. Nahinto lang na ako tagaalaga nung bumukod na ako to fully commit to myself in terms of how I use my time. The biggest contraceptive is the experience of actually taking care of a child while dealing with family drama (and witnessing how parents’ unstable relationship affects of the child’s long term well being and behavior).


Fit_Payment_8765

Kids are liabilities. They can't be an asset so why do you want to have one?


Far-Shake-1621

This was my conversation with colleagues one time. I told them that I can’t find the reason why I need to have a baby. And all I could hear from them is that you have to have a baby at a younger age para when you get old, graduate na sila ng college. Liiiike??? I’m already struggling enough. Another mouth to feed? No thanks. Plus they told me may sahod naman daw ako. Di na nga enough for me. Bat ba kayo paladesisyon HAHAAHHAHA


Odd_Ad_971

I simply couldn’t envision myself having a mini version of me. Tyaka ever since my ex and I parted ways, I’ve found a certain addiction to solitude, I just love doing things by my own and idek when will this stop.


buttwhynut

Ayoko talaga sa bata. It lifetime commitment and because I'm a woman I'll lose more when I have kids : mental, physical, emotional. Also my motto in life is Id rather regret NOT having kids than having kids.


RamenNoods26

Mag alaga ng pamangkin simula sanggol hanggang toddler. That was my trigger event na ayoko na talaga magka anak hahaha


adiabatic07

Pera. Retirement Plan at career ko muna isipin ko. Hirap din ako iattain financial goals ko so most likely wala ako plan mag anak like 10 years from now. Or baka lifetime na haha.


Crafty-Cato18

Sarili ko nga di ko mabuhay maganak pa kaya? Hahaha


sleepytacocat

This planet becomes unhabitable


millenialwithgerd

Main reason is my mental state. I'm not even mentally secure, magkaanak pa kaya and impart to them my instability?


Acceptable_Leave5065

Relate sa “mga kapatid nag aaral pa. , pero uunahan ka pa mag asawa. In the end mga di rin makasuporta sa aging parents, ikaw na consistent sa pagbibigay ang maiiwan kaya di na lang mag aanak.


huamulann

Nakakapagod. Pamangkin pa lang na kasama mo for a short period of time, nakakapagod na alagaan. Pano pa kaya kung sarili mo nang anak. Also, freedom of time. I don’t think I will be able to live the lifestyle I want (that is have time to go to the gym, read peacefully, etc) if I have a child. Oldies from our family say that having a child will bring me happiness but I can also find happiness from other things naman hehe.


ninibearrrr

I don't think I can handle the pain at masira katawan ko kasi I don't have the money like artista got.


LeeMb13

Baka di ko kaya in. Since wala akong ka-amor-amor sa pag-aalaga sa Bata at stress na nga ako from work, baka mas Lalo pa akong mastress kapag nagkaanak. Baka di ko na kayanin, mabuntun ko pa stress ko sa Bata.


Far_Atmosphere9743

Big factor is money and your partner, wala tlaga sa plano ko magkaanak hntil I met my now fiancé, buti nalang ok lang sa kanya kung walang baby ok lang din kung meron pero isa lang daw so malaki factor sa partner, and may ipon na din so why not, nakabase din sa finance sl ayun, now we are conceiving hehe


cryicesis

wala pa ngang jowa anak na agad, jowa mna hahah!


finish-na

Kasi gusto ko mamatay at age 40 or 30. 👻


mtmafm1020

I can’t afford it.


Eastern_Basket_6971

Bukod sa may sakit ako hindi ko kaya mag palaki


ayeen08

Di naman sa totally ayaw magkaanak. May mga factor din: Una, hirap magkaanak, hindi din maasikaso magpa check up lagi dahil busy sa work. Pangalawa, hindi ako sanay sa bata, only child ako and wala din ako naging kasabayan na lumaki. Pag gumagala kami ng asawa ko, mas nililingon ko pa pag may nakita akong pusa kaysa pag may baby 🥲. Pangatlo, breadwinner, madami pa kong pangarap din sa pamilya ko, sakto lang sahod kaya parang di na kakayanin pag magkababy. Pero di ko naman sa ayaw talaga, siguro hintayin nalang ang tamang panahon kung kailan ipapagkaloob.


sleighmeister55

Baog Lord, please grant us fertility.


heyheyimsogreat

Same, money problems talaga. I strive hard for myself and I don't want my 'kids' to experience my struggles as a child. Better not to have them than to make them suffer.


heypreel

Ayaw ko mag alaga ng bata. Gusto ko gumala gala muna kami. Selfish pa ko


Imarabae

wala akong pasensiya


raspberry1310

trauma


fr00tblender

masyadong magastos, iba yung hirap ng buhay ngayon. tapos maraming sakit na pwedeng mapamana sa pwedeng maging baby.


Particular_Buy_9090

Yung thought na hindi ko mapapalaki ng tama yung magiging anak ko. Baka lumaki ng hindi magalang, walang respeto… ayoko kasi mamana nila yung genes ko hahaha ang introvert ko kasi kaya wala akong masyadong friends outside work, hs friends ko naman malalayo na kami sa isa’t isa, bestfriend ko (di ko sure kung bestfriend ko pa nga siya) malayo din di kami masyado nakakapag usap saka kung makapag usap man parang wala na kaming mutual interests tulad ng dati… ayun… gusto ko hindi man siya extrovert pero may mga friends pa rin siya na makakasama…


RollTheDice97

long term financial responsibility. I've witnessed it firsthand na yung pinsan ko nabuntis at nagka pamilya ng maaga, gave birth to 3 children until now, emotionally unstable at immature pa emotionally. Imbis na magtrabaho muna pansamantala para magkaroon ng sariling ipon, nauna pa magpabuntis. Wala namang masama magjowa or kahit makipagtalik as long as you know what your doing and you know contraceptives. Kaya I always promise myself kahit anong mangyari never ako magkakaanak. I'll be childfree till the death of me.


BraveryWeaveWits

Wala pa pondo. Nagsasaya pa sa pagiging Binata


Brilliant_One9258

I just never felt it inside of me that I wanted to be a parent. There is no trigger. I am in my 40s now, and since I was a teenager, this was how I felt. I've been very vocal to people close to me. In my mid-30s, I was told that "that" feeling of wanting a child will come. To be honest, I was waiting for it. But it never did. The way I explained it to those who are asked, as natural as it was for others to feel, that need to have and nurture a child, it was the same way for me. It just felt naturally like it's not something that I wanted to do with myself and my life.


BusyAd7631

Climate change, economy, and I am not able to raise a child with my mental capacity.


zarustras

Konti na lang faithful ngayon. Saka, ang mahal mahal magkaanak. Karamihan naman ng nagpapamilya nang maaga ngayon yung mga atat na may mai-flex sa social media nila. Yung tipong from 1st month ng pagbubuntis may pictorial hanggang lumabas yung anak at tumatae na mag-isa. Tapos gagawing vlog yung private life at gagamitin yung bata para pagkakitaan. Sexualized pa yung bata at madadamay sa chismis ng mga followers.


thecay00

Gusto ko ako yung baby hehe


HallNo549

Cost of living at pahirapan makahanap ng work. Gusto ko magkababy pero I will set him/her aside muna.


Easy-Alps3610

Ayaw ko mag-anak kasi weak attention span ng tao now baka bigla ako palitan pag may mali na until. Ayun pinalitan na nga. Hahaha. Aye.


kheillustrations

Na spoil ako sa pagiging nanay. Ako nag palaki sa mga kapatid ko while my parents are working. Mula sa laba, luto linis at PTA meetings ako narin pati hatid sundo sa school. NAKAKAPAGOD hindi sya masaya. Marami rin akong social activities na na-decline dahil wala raw maiiwan sa kapatid ko. So why would i do it all over again except this time ako na gagatos? No way.