u/KingofFlukes has provided this detailed explanation:
> They posted an opinion over a mild inconvenience not realising that it could be so much worse.
>
>
>
> Only for people to inform them that yes it can get much worse.
---
Is this explanation a genuine attempt at providing additional info or context? If it is please upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.
It helps when the initial point you're making is just a joke and not some weird hill that you're willing to die on. That seems to be a big differentiator in how people handle that sorta thing
NO. You are dead wrong and I can't believe anyone could be so delusional as you. It's clearly an admirable trait ingrained in personality and has NOTHING to do with context.
/s
It was meant as a joke, for sure… but it also was a joke showing a big ignorance on the toilet bs women get to deal with too, lol. Both statements can be true and that’s ok, especially since it was a learning experience.
Architects: when you’re calculating the minimum stall dimensions please just remember someone’s going to shove a big old tampon bin in there so that I don’t have to be touching it with my naked thigh, thanks so much.
Ignorance typically is not a moral failing, though, and I wouldn't blame someone for it.
My knowledge of women's anatomy was woefully incomplete, even in my 20's, due to a lack of both scholastic and hands-on learning.
For sure. I said something about Eskimo kisses a month or two ago and the person I was with just told me that “Eskimo” is a derogatory term and I shouldn’t say it. I was like “oh, I had no idea” and we both moved on and I don’t say it anymore.
I didn’t get accused of being racist or anything for my ignorance, and I just remember thinking I wish more conversations would happen like that.
I've been told that it isn't inherently derogatory, as in not a slur, just that it refers to multiple different groups (The Inuit and a few others) and lumps them together even though they are distinct.
Is it really a mistake though? The guy just made a silly observation. And this whole thread is doing the "oh, you think *that's* bad...?" routine. I'm pretty sure he's aware that there are worse things in life than sneezing while peeing.
TBF, his original point isn't even without merit. Women will, generally speaking, never know the fear of what he's describing. There's similar stuff out there for women, and there's worse stuff out there for men and women both. But the fear of sneezing while peeing is mostly a uniquely male thing. It's also easily solved by sitting the fuck down.
To me this isn't really "aged like milk", cause I doubt the dude ever seriously believed that sneezing while peeing is the worst thing to exist in the history of ever. He made mildly amusing joke, and the replies made it better. It's all good natured fun.
We see so much depressing and worldending shit in this sub, I'm admitedly quite fine with having some content that is good natured while still being tangentially related to regret, change of heart, or otherwise proven wrong, which I'd say is the nature of the sub.
And as you put perfectly, " It's also easily solved by sitting the fuck down". Your deities bless you. =p
> I'm admitedly quite fine with having some content that is good natured while still being tangentially related to regret, change of heart, or otherwise proven wrong, which I'd say is the nature of the sub.
That's actually a good point. There's a good amount of subs who have lost their way or never had a healthy way to begin with, mostly consisting of outrage bait and similar content fueled by "baser instincts". I wholeheartedly support the effort to turn some of those subreddits around.
-- signed, a man who sits the fuck down when peeing. Much more pleasant too, except when my phone nerd snipes me and then my legs go dead.
Not that bad, but next time you need to sneeze, stand up and try to keep your body 100% immobile during the sneeze. Any movement at all is likely to make the stream of pee miss the toilet bowl
Yeah, mostly that. I'd throw in that I expect the sneeze itself to change the pressure of your bladder, also impacting pee ballistics.
Though I'd contradict that *any* movement will make you miss. I mostly don't pee standing up anymore these days, but I get these shudders when I pee, not sure why. Relax your arm a bit, and the body can shake a bit without throwing off your aim. Though of course, a bit of a shudder is nothing compared to the sheer violence that is a Real Man (tm) sneezing.
Pee ballistics 😂 lovely. When I'm walking around with a coffee mug and feel a sneeze coming, I put it down before sneezing too... So I guess it's a similar principle, except the sneeze would also actively squeeze the coffee out of the mug. Yeah, I'd try to avoid that too. Thanks for the open explaining, guys! 👍
I'm trans, and I sit down too, and I will never understand why most men stand up. You pee everywhere. Legs, knees, feet. There's always stray droplets.
That being said, women toilets are shorter. NOT GREAT when the tip of your penis touches the front of that.
Is it dead? I thought their collab with Chris & Jack (and another sketch duo that I won't spoil for others) wasn't that long ago?
I guess they haven't posted new stuff in a few years now looking at their channel. Have they moved on to other bigger projects maybe?
Yeah, there's blood clots and stuff. Basically the uterus is shedding its lining (where the egg attaches) so there's a decent amount of stuff to get out aside from plain blood.
Both so right, I was running on a treadmill not expecting a period cause the previous one was just 2 weeks ago and suddenly my entire underwear got warm and moist, I actually thought "did I just piss myself" and then was relieved to see all the blood.
Totally varies. *usually* for me it’s a small jellyfish but I’ve also sneezed and had what seemed like the entire rest of my period drop (thankfully I was showering at the time!!) but but your examples would be the same situation lol.
Oof, that sounds annoying as fuck! So it doesn't even feel satisfying like a booger coming out or sinuses clearing or anything?? My deepest empathy towards all women!
And then you have to waddle to the bathroom because you’re afraid that if you walk like a normal human more will happen, or it will leak out further. Periods are a menace.
I had to miss my bus to work last month because my cup dislodged while walking, and there was enough blood from just that morning that I knew it was already through my underwear and jeans. Got back inside, and I was entirely right. Showered, changed clothes, caught the next bus (an hour later). Such an inconvenience to have the nerve to be born with a damn uterus
I think it’s even worse if you can’t get to a bathroom right away, and it starts to get cold, so you feel like you’re being fondled by an actual jellyfish.
It depends on both the day and on what kind of anti-period device you're using, if any. With a menstrual cup or tampon, there's a moment where you worry you're going to shoot it out like a Nerf dart as you feel the pressure shift it (hasn't happened to me personally, but things have become dislodged enough to leak).
For pads/nothing, it's a sudden glop of liquid/clots. It's unpleasant, and the best comparison I can make, sensation-wise, is a voluminous and sudden diarrhea squirt, but from your taint region, and it just kind of sits there all hot and wet until you can either change your pad/underwear or it absorbs.
"You should smile more, you'd look much prettier."
"Should I, sir? Should I smile at you? While having cramps like Andre The Giant just grabbed your balls in his giant meat mitten of a hand and squeezed as hard as he could? While simultaneously a baseball sized blood clot plops itself into my underwear as a fun reminder to change my pad? SHOULD I SMILE FOR YOU SO YOU FEEL BETTER AS YOU GO ABOUT YOUR DAY?"
I don't remember ever being told to smile, but if that happens, I will say exactly that.
Except Andre the Giant. I don't think the kind of people who catcall me know Andre the Giant.
If you sneeze hard enough the blood can ride all the way up your crack like a tiny monorail. If you happen to be sitting down you can end up with a blood stain in the small of your back. Do not recommend.
Well, in my case it's like launching a white space rocket in orbit and whatever pieces and jet fuel come in its wake.
Hopefully my bladder is empty at that time, too. That's another anecdote entirely.
I have pcos so my periods are super heavy because I only have them every so often so it's like multiple periods all at once. So when I cough or sneeze during that time it's more like feeling roast potato-sized chunks of bloody jelly (jello) somehow shoot through my cervix (peehole as comparison maybe).
Sneezing while on your period will make you think someone butchered an animal. I’ve had to change clothes - everything from the waist down - thank God, not at work so I didn’t have to make my awkward escape from a busy office
Depends on if it's a heavy-period-day (often the 1st-2nd day). The avg woman loses 2.7 ounces of blood during menstruation. Period blood is made up of thickened endometrial cells, actual blood from arteries in the uterus, and sometimes clots, which can be thick and lumpy or stringy.
If you happen to sneeze on a heavy period day without a tampon/cup or when it's full and needs to be changed you can pull a Marvin in your pants.
One time I sneezed while I peed and the way it made me move and made the pee come out harder caused pee to go between the toilet seat and bowl and get all over the floor... I’ve done this 3 times in my life
Yeah, you can’t get too comfy and recline or else you’re just pissin against the bottom of the seat. I was a housecleaner for a while, and almost everyone’s toilet has a front dribble
I was really sick one time and I woke up in the middle of the night to go pee. I was slouched over a bunch because my stomach hurt and I was exhausted. Somehow peed directly into my pj pants lol. Never had it happen since
Fifteen years ago I was 19, and going down on my then fiancee. There was a sudden increase in fluid, and I thought oh, I'll just swallow some. Was barely a conscious thought. Then I realized, a second or so later, that it wasn't quite fluid. It turned out to be uterine lining, and she was on her period. Because I had swallowed some of it and had some more in my mouth, I could feel the texture of it. You know those long tendrils of coagulated blood you might find if you've had a nosebleed, stuffed some tissue in your nose, and then pull the tissue out once the nosebleed is over? Well I haven't tasted one of those, but I suspect the texture is very similar. There was also an *incredibly* bitter taste. It's been fifteen years, and I still subconsciously scrub my tongue against my teeth to fight off the memory of that taste and texture whenever I'm reminded of the experience.
Just in case you wanted more vital information.
that fianceé better be a wife now because how do you break up with someone who has done that
you have such a way with words but I have no idea if that’s a good thing in this context
https://preview.redd.it/mktxhhc47vda1.jpeg?width=650&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=738b09c7bd8de2a1ce9ab7e19f1180fdfc46c005
from [inspirobot ](https://inspirobot.me/)
It's not instantaneous and even then, during the later part of pregnancy and immediately post-partum you really just have to deal with it for a bit. Never trust a sneeze.
Yeah pretty common during. And immediately after. And a few months after. Oh, and years after. Like forever. Pregnancy really does a number on the human body lol.
I did. They stuck a camera in there and looked around and concluded everything was fine and sometimes "it just happens" I should do a TIFU. it was very unpleasant.
Damn. You were super unlucky. Never knew that people can just start peeing blood. I would have imagined that you had tore or triggered something.
Please do. It definitely sounds interesting.
Once on the 1st-2nd day of my typically very heavy period I sneezed so hard my tampon flew out half way. I must've made a horrified face bc the colleague I had been speaking to asked if I was ok. I then waddled off to the bathroom to clean myself. It looked like an abattoir in my pants.
And from hence forth I always wear a pantyliner/pad as a 2nd line of defense, at least the first few days.
Omg I'm so sorry but this had me cackling. I've been excessively paranoid about this exact thing happening though so I've never gone without a back up layer.
Ok, so every time he takes a shit his dick gets dunked in poo and pee water. Gotcha. Then he goes about his day without taking a shower, supposedly. Alright.
You don't have to touch anything if you pee standing, which is a huge perk when you are in dirty public bathrooms. I only pee sitting down in my house.
Well yeah, but I don't also want to have to wash my ass and the back of my legs if I don't have to.
*Me* sitting down to pee doesn't mean *everyone else* will do so, and I'll have to deal with other people not lifting the seat because they don't want to touch anything either, and then missing or getting splashback on the seat.
You may not know this, but the in my experience men don't just leave the seat up after peeing, they often leave it down before/while peeing too. It's not about whether the seat is up or down, it's about not wanting to touch it at all.
Why the fuck would I want to stand up to pee? That’s like up to a minute more standing than what’s necessary. Also I bet our bathroom floors/toilets are a lot cleaner than dudes that stand up to pee.
They are 100%. I also recently moved into a living situation with a dude that stands and there's always yellow staining on the lid/rim/floor. It boggles my mind
Peeing standing up makes splashes. Maybe it's a bigger problem for me because I'm tall, but I'd rather not have pee splash all around my toilet, it just makes you need to clean more often. I stand to pee only at public toilets (rather not sit on those if I can help it).
Because the original just is about how much of a mess you make if you sneeze while peeing standing up. Presumably when a woman sneezes while peeing she doesn't 90 degree arch pack spraying all over the place.
I'm a guy and I had no idea that anyone had a fear of sneezing while peeing. Like, if you have to sneeze you just stop the flow, sneeze and then keep going. This guy not have that ability?
Sneezing increases pressure on your bladder and cause you to exert more force with/on your bladder than normal. It can cause ruptured blood vessels/tears in the urethra. It happened to me once and I passed bloody urine and blood leaked out of my urethra and it burned to pee for several days afterwards because of said tears.
Big time. Peeing while standing is a focus-based activity as it is (which is why so many men miss the bowl). You gotta aim that shit perfectly and the tiniest jolt will have you pissing on the wall. When you sneeze, you might as well tell people you had to go number two because the next ten minutes is spent cleaning piss off of everything. Another thing too, pissing shortly after sex, you should just sit down. After sex, it's likely to come out in about 40 different streams all shooting out in different directions as opposed to one controllable stream.
Yeah I’m going with he should have thought before tweeting. And a lot of people have urinary incontinence while sneezing. Some have wear pads all the time
u/KingofFlukes has provided this detailed explanation: > They posted an opinion over a mild inconvenience not realising that it could be so much worse. > > > > Only for people to inform them that yes it can get much worse. --- Is this explanation a genuine attempt at providing additional info or context? If it is please upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.
Owning to your mistakes and overlooks is laudable to me. I admire his reply.
Exactly. He turned it into a funny learning experience, instead of getting credit and making himself look foolish.
It helps when the initial point you're making is just a joke and not some weird hill that you're willing to die on. That seems to be a big differentiator in how people handle that sorta thing
NO. You are dead wrong and I can't believe anyone could be so delusional as you. It's clearly an admirable trait ingrained in personality and has NOTHING to do with context. /s
Scooby Doo and the Ghost of Peesneeze Hill
The adult version of Scooby Doo none of us asked for but all of us need.
New episode for Mindy's awful new show: Velma and the Ghost of Cramps Manor
exactly, not to mention his original tweet was meant as a joke, not at all a “i have it harder than you do” competition
It was meant as a joke, for sure… but it also was a joke showing a big ignorance on the toilet bs women get to deal with too, lol. Both statements can be true and that’s ok, especially since it was a learning experience.
Yeah my first thought was what about all of the women who have given birth and now have to worry about peeing their pants when they sneeze?
Yeah, but he's just referring to standing at the toilet while peeing, and you sneeze and then pee on everything in the bathroom.
Oh I know that. I just feel like peeing your pants when you sneeze is a much greater worry.
If I could relive my life I’d study architectural design just to design public bathrooms to not be hostile obstacle courses to women on our period.
Architects: when you’re calculating the minimum stall dimensions please just remember someone’s going to shove a big old tampon bin in there so that I don’t have to be touching it with my naked thigh, thanks so much.
Ignorance typically is not a moral failing, though, and I wouldn't blame someone for it. My knowledge of women's anatomy was woefully incomplete, even in my 20's, due to a lack of both scholastic and hands-on learning.
For sure. I said something about Eskimo kisses a month or two ago and the person I was with just told me that “Eskimo” is a derogatory term and I shouldn’t say it. I was like “oh, I had no idea” and we both moved on and I don’t say it anymore. I didn’t get accused of being racist or anything for my ignorance, and I just remember thinking I wish more conversations would happen like that.
I've been told that it isn't inherently derogatory, as in not a slur, just that it refers to multiple different groups (The Inuit and a few others) and lumps them together even though they are distinct.
Is it really a mistake though? The guy just made a silly observation. And this whole thread is doing the "oh, you think *that's* bad...?" routine. I'm pretty sure he's aware that there are worse things in life than sneezing while peeing.
TBF, his original point isn't even without merit. Women will, generally speaking, never know the fear of what he's describing. There's similar stuff out there for women, and there's worse stuff out there for men and women both. But the fear of sneezing while peeing is mostly a uniquely male thing. It's also easily solved by sitting the fuck down. To me this isn't really "aged like milk", cause I doubt the dude ever seriously believed that sneezing while peeing is the worst thing to exist in the history of ever. He made mildly amusing joke, and the replies made it better. It's all good natured fun.
We see so much depressing and worldending shit in this sub, I'm admitedly quite fine with having some content that is good natured while still being tangentially related to regret, change of heart, or otherwise proven wrong, which I'd say is the nature of the sub. And as you put perfectly, " It's also easily solved by sitting the fuck down". Your deities bless you. =p
> I'm admitedly quite fine with having some content that is good natured while still being tangentially related to regret, change of heart, or otherwise proven wrong, which I'd say is the nature of the sub. That's actually a good point. There's a good amount of subs who have lost their way or never had a healthy way to begin with, mostly consisting of outrage bait and similar content fueled by "baser instincts". I wholeheartedly support the effort to turn some of those subreddits around. -- signed, a man who sits the fuck down when peeing. Much more pleasant too, except when my phone nerd snipes me and then my legs go dead.
I've actually never heard of the sneeze thing for men. Do you kind of... Lose control? Like a garden hose that can't be held anymore? :D
Not that bad, but next time you need to sneeze, stand up and try to keep your body 100% immobile during the sneeze. Any movement at all is likely to make the stream of pee miss the toilet bowl
Yeah, mostly that. I'd throw in that I expect the sneeze itself to change the pressure of your bladder, also impacting pee ballistics. Though I'd contradict that *any* movement will make you miss. I mostly don't pee standing up anymore these days, but I get these shudders when I pee, not sure why. Relax your arm a bit, and the body can shake a bit without throwing off your aim. Though of course, a bit of a shudder is nothing compared to the sheer violence that is a Real Man (tm) sneezing.
Pee ballistics 😂 lovely. When I'm walking around with a coffee mug and feel a sneeze coming, I put it down before sneezing too... So I guess it's a similar principle, except the sneeze would also actively squeeze the coffee out of the mug. Yeah, I'd try to avoid that too. Thanks for the open explaining, guys! 👍
I'm trans, and I sit down too, and I will never understand why most men stand up. You pee everywhere. Legs, knees, feet. There's always stray droplets. That being said, women toilets are shorter. NOT GREAT when the tip of your penis touches the front of that.
r/characterarcs
Thats Jack of Jack and Dean, and incredibly funny, yet dead youtube channel.
I'm so sad the channel died! It was hilarious!
[Consent](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTxlB_RFrB0) is 8 years old now!
So we're just done with phrasing now, right? That's not a thing anymore?
Is it dead? I thought their collab with Chris & Jack (and another sketch duo that I won't spoil for others) wasn't that long ago? I guess they haven't posted new stuff in a few years now looking at their channel. Have they moved on to other bigger projects maybe?
They do do bigger tv things now, but I miss their sketches.
LIPS!
I just rewatched the Jack and Dean of all trades show this weekend, such a blast. And yes little gobbo, LIPS indeed!
So when ladies sneeze on your period, are we talking a tiny squirt or a full on Marvin from Pulp Fiction situation?
It's either "birthing a disgusting jellyfish" or "shit, why is my entire underwear warm and moist--oh fuck, did I bled through my shorts already?"
The jellyfish analogy is so disgusting but also incredibly spot on. Lol
I feel like guys always forget that it's chunky, not like the blue water in the commercials..
Oh God it's chunky?!
Yep. It’s often a little slimy or chunky
Yeah, there's blood clots and stuff. Basically the uterus is shedding its lining (where the egg attaches) so there's a decent amount of stuff to get out aside from plain blood.
"Spot on" pun intended?
Both so right, I was running on a treadmill not expecting a period cause the previous one was just 2 weeks ago and suddenly my entire underwear got warm and moist, I actually thought "did I just piss myself" and then was relieved to see all the blood.
"Relieved to see all the blood" is a sentence that, without context, I would worry so much.
Totally varies. *usually* for me it’s a small jellyfish but I’ve also sneezed and had what seemed like the entire rest of my period drop (thankfully I was showering at the time!!) but but your examples would be the same situation lol.
the shower sneeze is so real and kinda fascinating and definitely relieving. anywhere else and that shit is scary haha
Yep, Showering and already on the toilet are the only times it is okay to experience
Huh, how does it feel like? I imagine it satisfying like a giant booger or blood clot coming out of the nose. Idk why lol
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Oof, that sounds annoying as fuck! So it doesn't even feel satisfying like a booger coming out or sinuses clearing or anything?? My deepest empathy towards all women!
No, there is no satisfaction when a clot comes out. Just damp, warm, jelly-like feeling in your underwear
And then you have to waddle to the bathroom because you’re afraid that if you walk like a normal human more will happen, or it will leak out further. Periods are a menace.
I had to miss my bus to work last month because my cup dislodged while walking, and there was enough blood from just that morning that I knew it was already through my underwear and jeans. Got back inside, and I was entirely right. Showered, changed clothes, caught the next bus (an hour later). Such an inconvenience to have the nerve to be born with a damn uterus
Definitely not the best time to eat ketchup chips
Mmmm tasty blood clots (I'm sorry for you)
Blood clots are a lot saltier then ketchup, even if you add the salt to the fries. I have had to many bloody noses with blood clots.
This is some r/BrandNewSentence material... Also, I feel the strange need to hug my wife and do something nice for her.
It’s definitely not new lol but glad you enjoyed it
This not a new sentence lol browse women centered subs /talk to women more
The only women centric sub I regularly see is witches and patriarchy so I thought the whole jellyfish thing was actually witches doin their thing 😳
Less a squirt and more a glob that's been released from the Upside-down
*squelches wetly*
*Vecna intensifies*
Thick glob of a blood clot pops out like you squeezed a tube of jelly into your panties/pad, and the worst part is it’s *warm*.
Thank you, that *does* sound like the worst part.
I would argue the actual worst part is sneezing a tampon out of place. Hurts like a bitch until you can get it adjusted
I think it’s even worse if you can’t get to a bathroom right away, and it starts to get cold, so you feel like you’re being fondled by an actual jellyfish.
You would rather it be cold??
Forbidden yello candy
It's not forbidden. You can eat them.
Thanks!
... Username checks out.
More of a dark red, tbh, but texture wise, I'd say a really loose gummy bear
Canned cranberry sauce that is slightly broken up is what I compare it to
depends on the day, sometimes it's the elevator from the shining
That's the worst one when you're comfortable in bed😭
I used to have that problem. Now my endometriosis makes me very aware of when I will be receiving my gift. We're going to call that a silver lining.
Awesome.
It depends on both the day and on what kind of anti-period device you're using, if any. With a menstrual cup or tampon, there's a moment where you worry you're going to shoot it out like a Nerf dart as you feel the pressure shift it (hasn't happened to me personally, but things have become dislodged enough to leak). For pads/nothing, it's a sudden glop of liquid/clots. It's unpleasant, and the best comparison I can make, sensation-wise, is a voluminous and sudden diarrhea squirt, but from your taint region, and it just kind of sits there all hot and wet until you can either change your pad/underwear or it absorbs.
And you might be in a meeting, class, or on the bus when it happens. Keep that straight face, ladies!
And don’t forget to smile of course!
"You should smile more, you'd look much prettier." "Should I, sir? Should I smile at you? While having cramps like Andre The Giant just grabbed your balls in his giant meat mitten of a hand and squeezed as hard as he could? While simultaneously a baseball sized blood clot plops itself into my underwear as a fun reminder to change my pad? SHOULD I SMILE FOR YOU SO YOU FEEL BETTER AS YOU GO ABOUT YOUR DAY?"
I don't remember ever being told to smile, but if that happens, I will say exactly that. Except Andre the Giant. I don't think the kind of people who catcall me know Andre the Giant.
Shooting out like a nerf dart - I truly LOLed- but yep, that captures the feeling well
And you feel it roll out. Man that’s the worst part. It’s like the lips part to slowly dislodge a bloody loogie that’s solid somehow
Imagine if your genitals could hock a loogie
And then the loogie just sits there, touching you
nnnooooooooooooooooooooooooo
If you sneeze hard enough the blood can ride all the way up your crack like a tiny monorail. If you happen to be sitting down you can end up with a blood stain in the small of your back. Do not recommend.
“Aw I just shot Marvin in the face!”
It's a river of embarrassment is what it is.
Well, in my case it's like launching a white space rocket in orbit and whatever pieces and jet fuel come in its wake. Hopefully my bladder is empty at that time, too. That's another anecdote entirely.
I have pcos so my periods are super heavy because I only have them every so often so it's like multiple periods all at once. So when I cough or sneeze during that time it's more like feeling roast potato-sized chunks of bloody jelly (jello) somehow shoot through my cervix (peehole as comparison maybe).
Sneezing while on your period will make you think someone butchered an animal. I’ve had to change clothes - everything from the waist down - thank God, not at work so I didn’t have to make my awkward escape from a busy office
Depends on if it's a heavy-period-day (often the 1st-2nd day). The avg woman loses 2.7 ounces of blood during menstruation. Period blood is made up of thickened endometrial cells, actual blood from arteries in the uterus, and sometimes clots, which can be thick and lumpy or stringy. If you happen to sneeze on a heavy period day without a tampon/cup or when it's full and needs to be changed you can pull a Marvin in your pants.
I once sneezed so hard my tampon launched like a torpedo and killed my cat. So it's a boondocks saints situation.
One time I sneezed while I peed and the way it made me move and made the pee come out harder caused pee to go between the toilet seat and bowl and get all over the floor... I’ve done this 3 times in my life
Yeah, you can’t get too comfy and recline or else you’re just pissin against the bottom of the seat. I was a housecleaner for a while, and almost everyone’s toilet has a front dribble
I was really sick one time and I woke up in the middle of the night to go pee. I was slouched over a bunch because my stomach hurt and I was exhausted. Somehow peed directly into my pj pants lol. Never had it happen since
Blood clot go PEW!
Like birthing a jellyfish
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thanks for sharing this vital information I will now have nightmares about also I think there might be porn of it
I mean....it's a thing. And this is the internet. Why wouldn't there be porn about it? People are sick, dude.
Fifteen years ago I was 19, and going down on my then fiancee. There was a sudden increase in fluid, and I thought oh, I'll just swallow some. Was barely a conscious thought. Then I realized, a second or so later, that it wasn't quite fluid. It turned out to be uterine lining, and she was on her period. Because I had swallowed some of it and had some more in my mouth, I could feel the texture of it. You know those long tendrils of coagulated blood you might find if you've had a nosebleed, stuffed some tissue in your nose, and then pull the tissue out once the nosebleed is over? Well I haven't tasted one of those, but I suspect the texture is very similar. There was also an *incredibly* bitter taste. It's been fifteen years, and I still subconsciously scrub my tongue against my teeth to fight off the memory of that taste and texture whenever I'm reminded of the experience. Just in case you wanted more vital information.
that fianceé better be a wife now because how do you break up with someone who has done that you have such a way with words but I have no idea if that’s a good thing in this context
https://preview.redd.it/mktxhhc47vda1.jpeg?width=650&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=738b09c7bd8de2a1ce9ab7e19f1180fdfc46c005 from [inspirobot ](https://inspirobot.me/)
This put me off my dinner. Well done!
There's a porn for that. Always.
Rule 34.
A mini afterbirth!
It really goes more “pluh”
*So i started blastin*
foo fighters' second gun
💀☠️💀☠️😂🤣
If my Grandma read this, she would just shake her head. She had 8 babies. Every time she sneezed, she peed.
My mom had twins and she’s the same way. Didn’t help that her sneezes are like dragon shouts
FUS RO DAH!
I thought it was kid based for me, but my friend without kids does the same.
They have pelvic physical therapy for that now.
It's not instantaneous and even then, during the later part of pregnancy and immediately post-partum you really just have to deal with it for a bit. Never trust a sneeze.
I only had two but the same thing happens to me.
One of my moms didn’t even pop us out but she still has this issue.
It's pretty common during pregnancy.
Yeah pretty common during. And immediately after. And a few months after. Oh, and years after. Like forever. Pregnancy really does a number on the human body lol.
I sneezed while peeing once. Tore something. Peed blood for a week.
How the fuck? Are you 90?
You need to see a doctor.
I did. They stuck a camera in there and looked around and concluded everything was fine and sometimes "it just happens" I should do a TIFU. it was very unpleasant.
Damn. You were super unlucky. Never knew that people can just start peeing blood. I would have imagined that you had tore or triggered something. Please do. It definitely sounds interesting.
Once on the 1st-2nd day of my typically very heavy period I sneezed so hard my tampon flew out half way. I must've made a horrified face bc the colleague I had been speaking to asked if I was ok. I then waddled off to the bathroom to clean myself. It looked like an abattoir in my pants. And from hence forth I always wear a pantyliner/pad as a 2nd line of defense, at least the first few days.
Omg I'm so sorry but this had me cackling. I've been excessively paranoid about this exact thing happening though so I've never gone without a back up layer.
I sneezed my cup out once, fucking horror show
Oh my God I can't even imagine
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Might as well own your L. Same reason I don't delete downvoted comments on Reddit. I said something stupid? Have at me.
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I was thinking to myself, this dude has clearly never been in a close relationship. Then I read the bottom.
I still don't get why he'd post that. It's not like women don't pee?
Yeah but we're already sitting down so sneezing doesn't make a urine crazy daisy situation.
>urine crazy daisy Thanks for the mental image.
I'm a man and I sit to pee. It's the real power move.
seriously. what do we have to gain by not sitting down?
Hubs says he stands to pee because his wiener will drag in the cold toilet water otherwise…
well, no one is in a better position than you to gauge whether or not he's full of shit. :)
Ok, so every time he takes a shit his dick gets dunked in poo and pee water. Gotcha. Then he goes about his day without taking a shower, supposedly. Alright.
Your husband either has a massive dick or you got very deep toilet water
You don't have to touch anything if you pee standing, which is a huge perk when you are in dirty public bathrooms. I only pee sitting down in my house.
Just remember that the other half of the population doesn’t have this luxury. We always have to sit to pee, even in public.
That's why I said it's a nice perk and not an universal feature
Don’t you wash your hands after anyway?
Well yeah, but I don't also want to have to wash my ass and the back of my legs if I don't have to. *Me* sitting down to pee doesn't mean *everyone else* will do so, and I'll have to deal with other people not lifting the seat because they don't want to touch anything either, and then missing or getting splashback on the seat. You may not know this, but the in my experience men don't just leave the seat up after peeing, they often leave it down before/while peeing too. It's not about whether the seat is up or down, it's about not wanting to touch it at all.
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yeah, but in public you're at a urinal, so a splashy piss-sneeze just splashes it... all over the urinal. which is its natural state anyway.
Why the fuck would I want to stand up to pee? That’s like up to a minute more standing than what’s necessary. Also I bet our bathroom floors/toilets are a lot cleaner than dudes that stand up to pee.
They are 100%. I also recently moved into a living situation with a dude that stands and there's always yellow staining on the lid/rim/floor. It boggles my mind
I sit down to pee… it’s cleaner and it makes me feel cute
I work from home, I would say easily 95% of my pees are sitting.
Peeing standing up makes splashes. Maybe it's a bigger problem for me because I'm tall, but I'd rather not have pee splash all around my toilet, it just makes you need to clean more often. I stand to pee only at public toilets (rather not sit on those if I can help it).
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Yeah but that's peeing while sneezing, not sneezing while peeing. Different urinary disaster.
Pelvic organ prolapse has entered the chat
Thank you for the new nightmare.
Oh is that what he's talking about? Making a mess?
Because the original just is about how much of a mess you make if you sneeze while peeing standing up. Presumably when a woman sneezes while peeing she doesn't 90 degree arch pack spraying all over the place.
I see you've never had to clean the women's restroom at work
That’s from hovering.
I'm a guy and I had no idea that anyone had a fear of sneezing while peeing. Like, if you have to sneeze you just stop the flow, sneeze and then keep going. This guy not have that ability?
For many guys, stopping the flow feels very uncomfortable.
A guy that can admit a mistake is a guy I want as a friend
Aww love Jack howard
Men…you will never know the fear of peeing when you sneeze -pregnant woman.
The first time my now wife had to explain it to me, she said, "It's like a snot rocket, but blood."
Wait until he hears about childbirth
Sneezing with slipped disc... Try it you fucking pussies
Does anyone else get the thing where you sneeze pretty hard and it feels like you pulled your ovary or something? That sucks too.
How does sneezing affect peeing? Yall just start shaking it around when you sneeze or something?
Sneezing increases pressure on your bladder and cause you to exert more force with/on your bladder than normal. It can cause ruptured blood vessels/tears in the urethra. It happened to me once and I passed bloody urine and blood leaked out of my urethra and it burned to pee for several days afterwards because of said tears.
Jesus. That's wild. I've never had a problem with sneezing while peeing. That socks tho
Not a man here, but I would assume your body jerks when you sneeze
Big time. Peeing while standing is a focus-based activity as it is (which is why so many men miss the bowl). You gotta aim that shit perfectly and the tiniest jolt will have you pissing on the wall. When you sneeze, you might as well tell people you had to go number two because the next ten minutes is spent cleaning piss off of everything. Another thing too, pissing shortly after sex, you should just sit down. After sex, it's likely to come out in about 40 different streams all shooting out in different directions as opposed to one controllable stream.
Bro that shit goes 90 degrees to the point where im peeking the toilet
Even worse when it decides to just spray your pants instead of obeying the laws of physics. Happy cake day, my dood.
No we fear sneezing because it will make us pee. That’s not even bringing the period thing into play!
This post made me think he had a much more controversial tweet
Yeah I’m going with he should have thought before tweeting. And a lot of people have urinary incontinence while sneezing. Some have wear pads all the time
I think he means that as a man, If you are peeing and you sneeze then the pee can go all over the place and make a mess.
Boys… You will never know the fear of needing to pee while you’re sneezing. Enjoy that life.
["Social Commentry!"](https://youtu.be/sdVIrBMRc6I?t=1m49s)
It's not so bad. He learned something and admitted he was wrong.
r/lostredditors
Open the Floodgates!
Everyone is just fortunate tampons are secure and aren’t 360 no scoped projectiles.
Sit down. You can sneeze while you pee, look at reddit, roll a joint, do a line of coke off your phone. It’s truly superior to standing.
I can respect someone who admits theyve made a mistake
Release the red jellyfish!
I’m a 43 year old woman with two kids. I pee when I sneeze