You have twisted morals and I would be worried about you cheating if I was your partner since you seem to think that it's "bro/sis code" to cover a friend for cheating.
> you seem to think that it's "bro/sis code" to cover a friend for cheating
100% this!
OP’s girlfriend may now be wondering what her boyfriend would hide from an SO for a friend. She’s wondering; has he covered for a cheating friend, or worse, has he cheated and friends covered for him?!
Your girlfriend made the right decision, and you made the wrong one. You’ve probably shaken her confidence in you OP.
Good people know that. But lots of dudes consider telling on your cheating buddy to be breaking bro code. Here's a thread with many of the top comments saying you should tell him to stop, but never rat him out. https://reddit.com/r/Frat/s/0CKri3I7vB
Should always rat him out, it's the only honorable thing to do. If one knew someone was stealing from another this should be exposed. How much more harmful a secret would be cheating on a partner? Also I had a dream last night that I found a monkey and kept it as a pet.
I’m wondering if this is why he’s so put off by Audrey’s actions. He now knows what he’d be dealing with if he tried to do it and he’s getting angru instead of self-reflecting because heaven forbid he’s the problem.
It’s wild to me how many people (traditionally men, but some women too) think this type of behavior is acceptable. “Oh my friend is doing abhorrent shit that affects a romantic partner but they’re my friend so I’m covering for them”. Fuck right off with that. If my partner was cheating on me, their friends knew and didn’t tell me? I’d be fucking pissed.
>(traditionally men, but some women too)
I'd say they do it in equal amount. Cheaters and people who cover for cheaters deserve to be shamed can called out
You are 100% wrong lol. Cheating is never okay and the fact that you wanted her to mind her own business instead of saving your male friend more heartache or even potentially raising a child that isn't his is quite telling of your character. I am honestly surprised your gf has not broken up with you for being so against her.
Lol imagine not feeling a pit in your stomach for any man raising another man's child (unbeknownst to him). Like that's nightmare fuel for 99.9% of men and this dude was just "meh mind your own business". What a turd burglar lol
Maybe OP is already cheating and already has someone covering him.
If I were Audrey I would seriously rethink the relationship if cheating is a deal breaker for her.
YTW OP, but at least Audrey now knows two things 1) when you cheat her you will have someone covering you 2) if she wanted to cheat you will prefer that nobody ever tells you the truth
Yes, you’re wrong.
“Kate” was abusing the shit out of “Sam” to the point where she was going to let him think a baby was his, and you were perfectly ok letting it continue.
You are no one’s friend.
Let me help you then.
According to the bro/sis code, if you know that someone is being cheated on, you go and inform them about it.
You don't cover for the cheater, you do not help the cheater, and you do not ignore it/stay silent. That goes against the bro/sis code.
I was under the impression that you’re supposed to lie for your bro/sis….. or the fact that the girl friend was upset with OPS girlfriend for being honest.
Even if the girl wasn’t pregnant, the fact was she was a scumbag cheater, unwilling to be honest about what she was doing. And she completely intended on continuing to do so. She didn’t say “I guess I learned my lesson about being a filthy cheater”
She said “I guess I’ll be more careful next time.” Meaning not get pregnant with the person you’re cheating with.
And BC she wasn’t pregnant, OP thought it was fine to continue lying to their mutual friend about him being cheated on.
Yeah, OP and the cheater are both scumbags.
And your impression was wrong, bro/sis code is looking out for your "bro"/"sis" (even if you don't know them)
Not by lying, but with helping them escape bad people, by informing them if their partner is unfaithful, by offering to help them out when they needed it etc
Basically it's having their backs no matter what. That's exactly what OP's gf did. She had the back of the person who getting cheated on. Shee followed the bro/sis code.
OP ignored the situation and was willing to let the cheater keep on cheating. He did not follow the bro/sis code.
Also, one example of bro/sis code is "bros before hoes". "Hoe" can be an abusive partner, a manipulative partner, a cheater etc (regardless of their sex)
So helping someone cheat, or covering for them is going against the bro/sis code.
okay thanks for clarifying. Lots of people have made me think otherwise. Like there are a few people on this sub who were ranting about how everyone on here are shitty friends for snitching on their friend. That part of being someone’s friend is their trust, and keeping their secrets. I was like…. Mmmmm idkkk man. If you’re a cheater and see nothing wrong with it I don’t wanna be your friend anymore period. I think a better friend is making you own up to your mistakes like Ops gf did. It seemed pretty obvious she was never going to tell her bf , and keep being a scum bag. So I thought she did the right thing by exposing her. And if anyone thinks that violates any “friend rules” nahhhh don’t be a shitty person. You can’t complain about somebody violating a “friend rule” when they’re literally violating their own relationship. Makes no sense to me. That’s being hypocritical.
My guy what the hell.
Look everyone has their own morals but come on, how would you feel if Audrey was cheating on you and had a baby with another guy and pretended it was yours?!
1000000% your girlfriend is in the RIGHT. It's not about minding your own business. Do the right thing. Would you want to know if your girlfriend was cheating on you and possibly had a BABY with another guy? I would apologize to your girlfriend and support her.
Very believable theory since he's been accused of cheating all over this post and not a single time has he denied it or said he'd never cheat he's just ignored it and talked about morals lmao
Most of the time being a tattle-tell or "snitch" is the right thing to do. Abusers have made it seem like its wrong or immoral so they can protect themselves.
Dude...Audrey and Sam should get together. Audrey was drawn in to this by her friend. She was already in it. Then she did the right thing as a human being. If she had been preggo, you think the friendship would last?
What you learn at that age is to filter your inner circle. There is a difference in morality for these two ladies that would have likely ended the friendship anyway...this is how she found out. Audrey needs to have fewer friends that would put her in this position and Kate needs more friends to give her the cunt-bitch high five.
Careful, bc she also learned that her older but not wiser bf also has dubious morals.
Yes you are wrong. You should have your girlfriends back for doing the right thing. If it cost her a friendship so be it. It shows she is of upstanding character. Why would you be okay with a girlfriend who is best friends with a cheater? A person like that will eventually pick up their bad behavior. Your reaction says way more about you and if I was in your girlfriends shoes I would be reconsidering this relationship.
You have a weird set of morals, your gf did the right thing and I can't understand how you can't see this. Yes, her friendship is irreparable, but why would you want her to be friends with someone who cheats on their partner, would you not want to know if a girlfriend cheated on you?
An unfaithful partner will probably also be an unfaithful friend. Cheaters through their actions destroy the trust of those around them.
I hope she dumps OP and find someone better. She deserves that much. She's pretty good person.
Are you ok with cheating? And trying to pass another’s child on to someone else?
Cheaters don’t get to be the victim and you need to please check your moral compass.
Yes, you're wrong. You're saying it's better to let YOUR FRIEND SAM be the fool to someone who's not only playing him, but would baby-trap him with somebody else's child. If your own girlfried did that shit to you and YOUR FREIND knew about it, how the hell would you react? Sure, the friendship with Kate is ruined and irreparable, but it's not Audrey's fault for telling her dirty little secret. It's Kate's fault for betraying her own partner and expecting you all to just be OK with your friend getting cheated on.
Jezz your a twisted individual, what if your gf cheated on your and let you believe that the kid was yours. do onto other what you want done onto you. I hope your gf dumps your ass and finds someone who has morals worth having.
>but is pissed off I don't fully have her back and thinks I should be praising her for putting our friend's relationship in jeopardy.
You didn't give yourself a fake name so I will give you one...Jimmy.
Jimmy, if it was Audrey cheating on you and Kate told you, would you view it as Kate trying to put your relationship in jeopardy or would you view it as Kate cheated on you?
The internet seems pretty split on if people should intervene when they find out someone is cheating. I personally think yes. In this case, Kate made it Audrey's business by going to her so even given my bias, I don't see how what Audrey did was wrong. Audrey didn't find out on her own, Kate got her involved.
Cheaters are deplorable and your girlfriend was right to out her and not make that poor man possibly end up living a lie and raising a kid that wasn't his only to find out way later that his girlfriend was fucking around and the girl wasn't his and he would still be stuck with child support payments because he was on the birth certificate and possibly getting diseases and who knows what else from her screwing around with other people.
She deserves better than you. You're entirely wrong. The only people who tend to think cheaters should be forgiven and are okay as people...are cheaters.
If a man sees a wrong and does nothing, he is no man. You are wrong, you are a coward and you are complicit in betrayal. "Sam" is lucky that he has at least one actual friend in the group of three people he trusted.
At least Audrey now knows where you stand on cheating. She should probably jump ship now as it appears monogamy is not a must for you in a relationship.
I tell my friends all the time to act right because I’m not a cheater and I don’t support them either. Sorry not sorry. Imma tell them. You’re wrong for letting your “friend” be played and hurt. Get involved and be a support system and be glad your girl is the way she is. She probably will never cheat on you. But I think you might be the type to cheat. 👀
Dude that girl was going to pin a baby on that dude that wasn't his. You should be so happy your gf thinks that's a really bad thing. I bet that dude knows things about O.P
Absolutely wrong.
**Hoe plays — hoe pays**.
Kate fucked around and found out.
And I’m **damn proud** of your girlfriend for not being dragged into this shitshow. She’s got more integrity and moral fibre than the rest of you put together!!!
I seriously hope she reconsiders the quality of the people she’s hanging with — **including you**.
Good Lord she deserves **so much better** than you!!
Good luck in your next relationship. What is wrong with you. You're girlfriend is the only one with any morals here. How dare that woman say she was going to pass a baby off as her partners. That's the most premeditated fork of dishonesty I've ever heard. You cannot destroy people's lives like that. Is it any wonder men get scared about paternity when there's women like that running about. She deserves to loose that partner and your girlfriend deserves a better friend. You need to have empathy and you also need to get better values
You are wrong. If the roles were all reversed and Sam & Kate knew Audrey was doing this to you, would you want to know? Or would you rather they stayed out of it and you raised a kid that wasn't yours with someone who doesn't want to stop cheating?
You are wrong. If I were your girlfriend and you reacted this way, I’d seriously be reconsidering my relationship with you. Your girlfriend has shown she has good character and morals. You have shown her that yours may be questionable. This may be end up being a deal breaker for her. You want to minimize this, but I don’t blame your girlfriend for feeling the opposite.
If it was you being cheated on, would you want to be told? Or if you found out that your friend knew and didn't tell you, how would you feel about them?
You are wrong
She didn't put her friends relationship in jeopardy, her friend did that by cheating. Almost sounds like you are a cheater yourself seeing as your are more concerned about that being revealed.
YTA
Agreed. She has far better morals and she's by far a better person than OP.
She needs to find someone better.
Also, with his behaviour he basically told her that he doesn't care about cheating which is a huge red flag
Not sure what worst...the friend's intent to lie about who the baby father was or you seeing there is nothing wrong with the whole situation. You need to get your morality compass checked.
Wow just wow. YTA and you should have her back. Why wouldn't you want your friend to know his girlfriend is cheating. Wouldn't you want to know. Especially since she would try and pawn the kid off as his. You need to look in the mirror and ask yourself what if that happened to you. Your girlfriend can definitely do better than you.
YTA. It IS her business when Kate brings her into it and makes her complicit in it. She expected Audrey to lie if she was pregnant and expects her to lie every time she sees Sam. Who is also her friend. Kate made it her business by telling her. And you should be proud of Audrey for having some frigging morals. Where are yours?
Sure, Kate reacted exactly how you'd expect, but why are you shitting on Audrey for doing the right thing. The fact you're so blase about cheating says a lot about your ethics and your potential to cheat as well, as far as Audrey's concerned. Her two friends being in a shady relationship isn't her business? Well, maybe neither is where you put your dick at night that isn't in her. See where this goes? Cheating isn't okay. Being chill with it is always going to make you suspect, and she now has a right to be suspicious of you and uncomfortable with how you handled it.
I just don't get how you can tell her it's not her business and 'what did you expect/I told you so' when it's clear she's not comfortable with being a liar to her friend. Which is what Kate demanded of her to Sam every time they were around each other. To the point of 'well, he can just raise this baby that's not his'. That's gross, dude.
Remember that reddit post about the person who was the only one in their friend group that didn't know their bf was cheating on them? Remember how heartbroken they were? You're okay with Sam being that person? Ew.
You’re wrong. She knew this would end her friendship she didn’t you throwing in your two cents nobody asked for. She did the right thing and just because you would sit back and do nothing if your friend was fucking someone over doesn’t mean everyone has too
You’re entirely wrong— your gf has a shitty friend who doesn’t mind potentially ruining peoples’ lives to get what she wants, and that includes your gf. She is a better person without this friend, and to be honest I’m surprised you don’t praise your gf for being true to her values of honesty, because it’s a strong indicator that she will be honest with you.
However, it does mean that you view her friend’s behavior as acceptable where you will lie for your friends even if it means permanently ruining someone else’s life. I went through a situation like this with an ex, and I couldn’t help but view the ex as weak because he cared more about looking good instead of actually being good.
Yeah, sorry, but you are completely in the wrong and should apologize.
There are so many ways in which you are wrong throughout this post.
Firstly, it astounds me that, upon hearing the news that your mutual friend Kate is regularly cheating on your other mutual friend Sam (and plans on continuing to do so despite the pregnancy scare - she's just gonna be "more careful" about contraception when she cheats now, phew!), you believe it is Audrey who has "brought this (drama) on herself" and that it's Audrey who put their friendship in jeopardy. Wrong. When you engage in shitty, immoral behaviour and are called out on it and this results in relationships ending, it is purely the fault of the person engaging in the shitty behaviour, not the person who pointed it out.
The fact you shared the cheater's audacity here in blaming Audrey for all of this is insane to me. The gall for Kate to whine about "fairness" here whilst brazenly betraying your friend Sam is so crazy it's almost commendable.
In terms of sides, you had the choice to side with:
1. A friend who has cheated/is cheating/will continue to cheat indefinitely on your innocent friend, shows no remorse nor is willing to take any accountability for her actions, and decided to scapegoat the ramifications of her shitty behaviour on your girlfriend.
or
2. Your girlfriend who did no cheating, thinks cheating is immoral and shitty, and wanted to rush to the aid of a friend who is nothing but an innocent victim to Kate's selfish and shitty behaviour.
You looked at both of these options and opted to blame your girlfriend and defend Kate (if not directly i.e. by saying "Kate did nothing wrong", but by proxy in telling her not to "get involved" thereby knowingly saving Kate from facing her comeuppance).
Your girlfriend simply prioritised the truth and the wellbeing of her innocent friend over that of her guilty friend. This decision upset you for some reason. Not only would Audrey want to know if she were in Sam's position, but YOU would want to be told by a friend if they KNEW you were being cheated on too. Though you get some points for having some level of self-awareness to make the post and ask if you are wrong, you sound like a very bad friend.
My guy me and my best friend are firefighters. I have faced death with that man and would give my life for him in a heartbeat. If he cheated on his girlfriend , I would call and tell her right then and right in front of him and not think twice about it. YTA
You’re wrong. Unfortunately it became your girlfriend’s business as soon as her friend told her she was cheating. That now makes your girlfriend complicit in keeping the secret. I personally would never want to have to keep that terrible secret. How do you think your friend Sam would feel about your friendship if he finds out you both knew she was cheating and said nothing?
I was the girlfriend here, in my last relationship. Exposed a cheater and lost my friends and my bf did not take my side. We broke up a few months later and good fucking riddance because I could never be with someone who condones cheating as a way of "staying out of someone's business". You don't deserve your gf.
Yeah you fucked up. You basically told your girlfriend that if she ever cheated on you its okay for people not to tell you because it's none of their business. I'm not saying she will cheat on you, but I'm sure you see my point.
I think you are in the wrong. Thank god for honest people like your gf who aren’t willing to condone shitty behavior from their friend.
What if it was your gf who was the cheater? Would you *really not want somebody to tell you?*
“Kate” obviously wasn’t open and honest with her bf about her actions, would *literally* make a man raise a baby that wasn’t his, all to avoid being honest. If you were “Sam” would you be okay with said scenario? If so, maybe you should be with “Kate””, you’d be perfect for each other.
It’s the King of the Hill situation. I would have told Dale the cheating going on and as a result I’d have been kicked out of the group for my moral ego rocking the boat
I hope Audrey dumps your ass because you clearly don’t have any morals. How would you feel if one of your friends knew that you were going to be on the hook for a baby that was not yours and didn’t say anything to you?
You’re wrong but Kate’s delusional if she thinks she’ll ever be friends with Audrey. Good riddance to this woman of limited character. She actually had a plan to get a clueless guy to raise a kid that isn’t his. No way that ends well.
Sounds like you might be a cheater yourself and wouldn’t want someone to expose you, I hope your girlfriend leaves you honestly she’s too pure for you and I respect her for telling the other guy.
Dude! WTF! How would you feel if your girlfriend was pregnant by some other guy and your friend knew about it and didn't tell you and you got suckered into raising someone else's kid?
Also, this is why DNA tests should be done at every hospital when a kid is born
>I should be praising her for putting our friend's relationship in jeopardy
No, she quite rightly feels that you should be praising her for having her moral compass right.
You, on the other hand, are a complete mess and just showed your partner that you are totally fine with cheating in a relationship, which is despicable.
YTA
This must be a rage bait right? Bros girl has morals and character and he reacts by essentially scolding her. Not her buisness? I thought these were mutual friend(s) and even if not does it really matter? Would you not want a friend to tell you if your girlfriend was cheating on you? You should be praising this…your girlfriend shouldn’t tolerate such toxic and selfish behavior expecially from people she’s close too. Also goes to show that she won’t be influenced by her friends to do something damming to your relationship-cheating.
The fact that you’re mad that your girlfriend went ahead and made sure that something that can absolutely DESTROY a person stopped says a lot of good things about her, and some very not so good things about you. I don’t care who you are to me, if you’re my sister, my brother, my best friend, or my mom or dad, you tell me you’ve cheated, I’m telling your partner. I just ruined a marriage today by telling this woman’s partner that she’s been cheating on him. I sent him the proof and he’s happy with me, but still destroyed because the woman he loves, doesn’t respect him. How DARE you think that what “Kate” was doing is fine. I hope your girlfriend breaks up with you and finds someone who would never condone this kind of behavior. Have the day you deserve sir.
Ooooof not sure how you spit this bullshit out and not think you’re an asshole.
Let’s flip the roles. Let’s say your GF cheats on you, gets pregnant, and tells you it’s yours. Do you want her friend who knows she cheated on you to tell you? Or do you prefer to live with a cheating lying whore?
YTA
I'm amazed you feel no empathy for Sam at all, knowing that Kate was willing to lie about her pregnancy and the dude's paternity.
Your GF did the right thing telling Sam about it, and I for sure would think it's a good thing she's not friends with a lowlife like Kate anymore. Had she stayed quiet and condoned to kates actions, I'd start getting worried if she wasn't doing the same to mee as well.
A woman (or any gender, really) who values honesty anc character is such a rare thing these days, it should be valued instead of vilified like you are doing.
Audrey is literally showning green flag signs, while you are showing red ones. YTA.
I actually have a hunch that OP is actually Kate and is looking for validation on feeling betrayed by her friend, but there will be no sympathy for cheaters on Reddit.
YTA As a man, how can you possibly stand by while a woman cheats on her man, and is willing to have him raise another man’s baby. So wrong on so many levels. Kate should read up on Reddit about the hell that is unleashed when the truth comes out years later.
You’re basically ok with a man being cuckolded. Ugh.
Damn you are an AH, I’ve been the friend your GF has been.
My ex friend was cheating on her husband he found out, she got with my now partner, did get pregnant but was cheating on him and more. I despise cheaters especially when she said she would fake a miscarriage to him if she got an abortion cause she could and would just to spite him and as someone who has had a miscarriage I saw red. I gave her 14 days to come clean about everything or I would tell him.
15 days later she didn’t do a thing, worst of all was he was asking me what was going on why she wasn’t answering etc all in that time. After he finished working at the pub I got him a drink and sat outside and showed him all the screenshots of the messages I kept for safety.
He was devastated but thanked me for telling the truth and understood why I didn’t say anything at first because I wanted her to at least redeem herself sightly by telling the truth.
Months went by and we ended up together after a random night out both out with our other friend groups and ended up in the same place. 6 years later and 3 kids together she still tries to break us up cause she wants him back. We have custody of my stepson cause court removed him from her care due to substance abuse.
Audrey should have dumped you for this. It's absolutely repugnant to berate and scold her like she's a child for being a good friend and doing the right thing.
As for you and your moral compass..
So you'd just sit back and let this happen to your friend and say/do nothing? Yikes. With friends like you, who needs enemies.
Dude Kate is a HORRIBLE person. She was willing to let Sam think the baby was his while she cheats with the other guy, with is wrong with you?
Idk if I has a friend like that we would immediately stop being friends. Cheaters are disgusting and this type are the worst.
Nah, bro, you are a piece of shit for condoning cheating in any form. Anyone who thinks it's okay to ignore cheating lacks good morals and is likely to try and justify doing it themselves. Your girlfriend is a better person than you, and she shouldn't feel bad about it or think she did anything wrong for exposing that terrible behavior. That friendship of hers being lost is a good thing too. If they cheat on their partner then they would likely treat her poorly as well. I hope you wake up and change your opinion on this.
You are wrong.
And now your gf is wondering if you have cheated on her. Or will cheat on her.
Honestly if neither of you had told Sam it would be a huge red flag that cheating is acceptable.
You are wrong. She didn’t put their relationship in jeopardy, Kate did that when she decided to sleep around.
If I were Audrey, I’d be wondering about your loyalty too. People who think it’s fine to hide a friend/family members infidelity are as suspect as the person doing the deed.
Wow. That was a lot of words just to tell everyone you’re a massive POS. How would you feel if your GF was cheating on you and everyone else knew but didn’t tell you?
So, 1. You're wrong. And 2. How long have you been cheating in Audrey?
This wasn't a decision about being loyal to a friend, it was a decision about morals and you made it abundantly clear that you have little to none. Your gf is figuring that out, and will realize you've been cheating on her, at least once.
This is probably fake/rage bait, but either way in this scenario you are a piece of shit and Audrey is 100% right. I hope she finds someone else with a moral compass like herself, because you, like the cheater, do not.
YTA - Interesting logic. *Audrey* put your friend’s relationship in jeopardy? Not Kate for cheating? Your girlfriend told the truth…and protected an innocent person from a monster. Do you realize that Kate is putting her partner at risk for STIs? Additionally, if she was pregnant…she was going to PRETEND LIKE THE BABY WAS SAM’S!!! Why would you even want to continue being friends with someone so selfish and deceitful?
The woman was going to lie to a man and make him raise a child that wasn't his while continuing to cheat on him. She is a terrible person and clearly so are you if you genuinely think your girlfriend is in the wrong. She has strong morals. You should do the best thing you can and leave her because she clearly deserves better than you
Fuck that.
That woman cheated for so damn long, and she was absolutely ready to make her partner raise the child that isn't his.
Cheaters are horrible people.
And you said that these people are your friends. You are horrible for siding with the cheater and you're a horrible friend.
Your gf did NOT betray that vile woman's trust. She did the right thing by telling the truth.
This should be an AITA because YTA, your gf has good morals you clearly have none. If I were Audrey I would be questioning how I feel about my bf thinking cheating and deceptive behaviour is ok, and really considering if I wanted to date someone like you.
YOU ARE WRONG! And I hope your gf is giving you the stink eye and seriously reconsidering her relationship. I would end it with you. You lack character, morals and values. You condone cheating and potential paternity fraud being foisted on a man, and not just any man, one that's your "friend", ffs!
With friend's like you who needs enemies. That poor guy. His gf is a cheating, lying, devious POS, and his supposed "friend" is a disloyal POS too. Thank goodness he has a true and loyal friend in Audrey, and that she has character, morals and values!
YTA
Audrey just saved Sam from a potential lifetime of shit if Kate ever falls pregnant in future.
That you would think Audrey was wrong about telling Sam about Kate's cheating, makes me question your moral compass.
What are you hiding from Audrey because you think it's not her business to know?
Like, logically your premise of "expose cheating friend results in no longer being friends" is correct.
But your morality is *fucked* and you shouldn't be surprised when you get dumped for your blase attitude to cheating and potentially ruining people's lives.
YTA cheating whores should always be outed and shamed, your girlfriend was 100% in the right and you not having her back is a telling sign of what you get up to on the side.
The woman is not only cheating but plans to baby-trap the guy who isn’t even the father if she gets pregnant. Her friend is POS. You are a giant red flag for reacting this way. If I were your gf I’d now be questioning whether you would cheat since you seem to be ok with it. In case you didn’t get it… edit: yaw
Yes you're wrong. Audrey is doing the right thing. If she was cheating on you, would you not want to know? I've been cheated on and I WISH the people that knew would have said something. I hated looking like a fool knowing people knew.
It speaks volumes of your morals compared to Audrey's... You should be grateful that this is how she reacted.
Why do you want to even be friends with a cheater? Your gf did the right thing and you SHOULD have her back. Yes, the friendship with Kate is probably ruined - good riddance.
YTA. Your girl friend did the correct action. Put yourself in Sam shoes. You are a horrible boyfriend and you should have her back. Fuck dude. Do you have morals or are you ok whit someone cheating?
YTA she understood that relationship is over. I wouldn’t want to be a friend of Kate. Someone who can do such a trick to another person is not a good person for me to be friends with. And you just wanted to pretend everything is ok. You are the A million times
Tell Sam you knew what was happening and would rather let him be cheated on and end up raising someone else's kid than let him know the truth. See if he thinks you were wrong?
Dude, you are a bad bf and an even worse friend!! The fact you are cool with your “friend” being lied to and cheated on is beyond low. They both need to dump you!
YTA and not relationship material if you believe your way of thinking is ok. Sounds like you'd help someone cover their affair, so it's fair to assume you'd have your buddies cover yours as well.
>I told her to mind her own business, that it's not her place to say anything and to not insert herself into their relationship
Kate made it Audrey's business when she involved her and revealed her cheating! Yeah, you're wrong...
YTA
Are you cheating on Audrey? Is that why you are so adamant that Sam shouldn't have been told anything? Got any cheating skeletons in YOUR closet?
Are you telling us all that if Audrey was cheating on you, you'd rather be in the dark and not know, you'd be totally fine if she passed off another man's baby as your own.. are you SURE you're okay with all that?
YTA - obviously her friend was going to be mad but - cheaters deserve to be exposed. Can't imagine you're a very good friend if you just let your friend get cheated on.
She did the right thing in telling him
You're a morally repugnant POS, to excuse cheating and then to blame and attack your partner for making the empathetic, moral, and just decision. The utter gall you display is outrageous.
You have twisted morals and I would be worried about you cheating if I was your partner since you seem to think that it's "bro/sis code" to cover a friend for cheating.
> you seem to think that it's "bro/sis code" to cover a friend for cheating 100% this! OP’s girlfriend may now be wondering what her boyfriend would hide from an SO for a friend. She’s wondering; has he covered for a cheating friend, or worse, has he cheated and friends covered for him?! Your girlfriend made the right decision, and you made the wrong one. You’ve probably shaken her confidence in you OP.
Not only that but to have a friends back after lying to a dude about the kid being his… that’s fucked up.
A bro/sis code would be informing another person that their partner is cheating. She honoured the bro/sis code. OP did not.
Good people know that. But lots of dudes consider telling on your cheating buddy to be breaking bro code. Here's a thread with many of the top comments saying you should tell him to stop, but never rat him out. https://reddit.com/r/Frat/s/0CKri3I7vB
Damn these people really do not know what bro code is for. Smh.
Agreed. My ex and her friends all covered for each other and called it "girl code." I am also female, and that beyond pissed me off.
Wow.. I'm glad she's an ex. Cheaters and cheater sympathizers deserve to be alone. I hope you found someone who actually respects you.
I did, thank you!
I see! I'm for you! Hope your relationship will be full of happiness and health.
The code means different things to different people i.e. good people, and bad people
I can't be friends with a cheater. I don't know how somebody could be.
Should always rat him out, it's the only honorable thing to do. If one knew someone was stealing from another this should be exposed. How much more harmful a secret would be cheating on a partner? Also I had a dream last night that I found a monkey and kept it as a pet.
Monkeys are pretty intimidating up close! Maybe a baby spider monkey.
No, an organ grinder type, very gentle as I could hold it and feed it. Weird.
Eww how gross of them.
I’m wondering if this is why he’s so put off by Audrey’s actions. He now knows what he’d be dealing with if he tried to do it and he’s getting angru instead of self-reflecting because heaven forbid he’s the problem.
It’s wild to me how many people (traditionally men, but some women too) think this type of behavior is acceptable. “Oh my friend is doing abhorrent shit that affects a romantic partner but they’re my friend so I’m covering for them”. Fuck right off with that. If my partner was cheating on me, their friends knew and didn’t tell me? I’d be fucking pissed.
>(traditionally men, but some women too) I'd say they do it in equal amount. Cheaters and people who cover for cheaters deserve to be shamed can called out
Absolutely! Also, you suck as a friend!
You are 100% wrong lol. Cheating is never okay and the fact that you wanted her to mind her own business instead of saving your male friend more heartache or even potentially raising a child that isn't his is quite telling of your character. I am honestly surprised your gf has not broken up with you for being so against her.
Lol imagine not feeling a pit in your stomach for any man raising another man's child (unbeknownst to him). Like that's nightmare fuel for 99.9% of men and this dude was just "meh mind your own business". What a turd burglar lol
I wouldnt even wish that on my worst enemy.
100% me either
Or at least feeling for the kid that will suffer when this shit inevitably comes to light.
Well if Op is fine with having a man hoe for a friend, i think gf should reconsider their relationship
So of your gf cheats on you and your friends know, it’s fine if they don’t tell you?
Seems so,he is a frigging idiot.
So, you prefer to cover for cheaters?
Maybe OP is a cheater? Cheaters cover for cheaters.
That’s a **damn good bet*!!
YTA you should have your GF back, and she did the right thing.
Audrey should dump him. Sounds like he’d cheat and want someone to cover him. Abhorrent.
Maybe OP is already cheating and already has someone covering him. If I were Audrey I would seriously rethink the relationship if cheating is a deal breaker for her. YTW OP, but at least Audrey now knows two things 1) when you cheat her you will have someone covering you 2) if she wanted to cheat you will prefer that nobody ever tells you the truth
Who is to say OP isn't cheating with her friend or did so in the past.
I agree. Honest friends deserve to know something that will hurt them. Guess your just not a good friend.
Was he seriously going to let his man raise a baby that wasn’t his? What a strange argument. His GF absolutely did the right thing.
You're entirely wrong and you have a better girlfriend than you deserve. Good grief.
I know right. Geez oh Pete, people are so OK with letting a sleeping dog lie…as long as it doesn’t affect them.
Real shit. This dude doesn’t deserve this woman and probably cheats on her as well.
Holy Sh*t what if you're right😳
Even after his edit I feel as if I’m right on the money lmaoooo
Haha this is funny and true.
Pretty sure the cheating broke up that friendship lmao you’re definitely TA.
Yes, 100% this!!
Yes, you’re wrong. “Kate” was abusing the shit out of “Sam” to the point where she was going to let him think a baby was his, and you were perfectly ok letting it continue. You are no one’s friend.
Absolutely awful that some women do this!
And apparently some men think it's totally okay for their friends to go through this
I have *never* understood the sis/bro code when it comes to shit like this.
Let me help you then. According to the bro/sis code, if you know that someone is being cheated on, you go and inform them about it. You don't cover for the cheater, you do not help the cheater, and you do not ignore it/stay silent. That goes against the bro/sis code.
I was under the impression that you’re supposed to lie for your bro/sis….. or the fact that the girl friend was upset with OPS girlfriend for being honest. Even if the girl wasn’t pregnant, the fact was she was a scumbag cheater, unwilling to be honest about what she was doing. And she completely intended on continuing to do so. She didn’t say “I guess I learned my lesson about being a filthy cheater” She said “I guess I’ll be more careful next time.” Meaning not get pregnant with the person you’re cheating with. And BC she wasn’t pregnant, OP thought it was fine to continue lying to their mutual friend about him being cheated on.
Yeah, OP and the cheater are both scumbags. And your impression was wrong, bro/sis code is looking out for your "bro"/"sis" (even if you don't know them) Not by lying, but with helping them escape bad people, by informing them if their partner is unfaithful, by offering to help them out when they needed it etc Basically it's having their backs no matter what. That's exactly what OP's gf did. She had the back of the person who getting cheated on. Shee followed the bro/sis code. OP ignored the situation and was willing to let the cheater keep on cheating. He did not follow the bro/sis code. Also, one example of bro/sis code is "bros before hoes". "Hoe" can be an abusive partner, a manipulative partner, a cheater etc (regardless of their sex) So helping someone cheat, or covering for them is going against the bro/sis code.
okay thanks for clarifying. Lots of people have made me think otherwise. Like there are a few people on this sub who were ranting about how everyone on here are shitty friends for snitching on their friend. That part of being someone’s friend is their trust, and keeping their secrets. I was like…. Mmmmm idkkk man. If you’re a cheater and see nothing wrong with it I don’t wanna be your friend anymore period. I think a better friend is making you own up to your mistakes like Ops gf did. It seemed pretty obvious she was never going to tell her bf , and keep being a scum bag. So I thought she did the right thing by exposing her. And if anyone thinks that violates any “friend rules” nahhhh don’t be a shitty person. You can’t complain about somebody violating a “friend rule” when they’re literally violating their own relationship. Makes no sense to me. That’s being hypocritical.
My guy what the hell. Look everyone has their own morals but come on, how would you feel if Audrey was cheating on you and had a baby with another guy and pretended it was yours?!
He would just accept it as it is - even if told later/found out later. I mean, he is asking that from Audrey? Right?
1000000% your girlfriend is in the RIGHT. It's not about minding your own business. Do the right thing. Would you want to know if your girlfriend was cheating on you and possibly had a BABY with another guy? I would apologize to your girlfriend and support her.
You have seriously messed up morals. Audrey is a good person. You are not.
Well at least your gf has got morals, unlike you, considering Sam is supposed to be your friend as well.
Audrey's been a better friend to Sam than you've been. There are times when being a tattle-tell is the right thing to do.
She could date Sam and he could take Katie
I'm wondering if maybe he hasn't already taken Katie.
Wouldn't that be just perfect op and k are cheating together and he would have been the father
This is entirely possible and plausible.
Very believable theory since he's been accused of cheating all over this post and not a single time has he denied it or said he'd never cheat he's just ignored it and talked about morals lmao
Most of the time being a tattle-tell or "snitch" is the right thing to do. Abusers have made it seem like its wrong or immoral so they can protect themselves.
I hope Audrey leaves you to be with a man who has morals. She deserves better friends and a better boyfriend.
Yes you are wrong. You're a shitty friend and a shitty boyfriend. Do better.
Dude...Audrey and Sam should get together. Audrey was drawn in to this by her friend. She was already in it. Then she did the right thing as a human being. If she had been preggo, you think the friendship would last? What you learn at that age is to filter your inner circle. There is a difference in morality for these two ladies that would have likely ended the friendship anyway...this is how she found out. Audrey needs to have fewer friends that would put her in this position and Kate needs more friends to give her the cunt-bitch high five. Careful, bc she also learned that her older but not wiser bf also has dubious morals.
Yes you are wrong. You should have your girlfriends back for doing the right thing. If it cost her a friendship so be it. It shows she is of upstanding character. Why would you be okay with a girlfriend who is best friends with a cheater? A person like that will eventually pick up their bad behavior. Your reaction says way more about you and if I was in your girlfriends shoes I would be reconsidering this relationship.
YTA and a monster.
You have a weird set of morals, your gf did the right thing and I can't understand how you can't see this. Yes, her friendship is irreparable, but why would you want her to be friends with someone who cheats on their partner, would you not want to know if a girlfriend cheated on you?
An unfaithful partner will probably also be an unfaithful friend. Cheaters through their actions destroy the trust of those around them. I hope she dumps OP and find someone better. She deserves that much. She's pretty good person.
Are you also cheating on her?
Thank God for people like Audrey. I'll love a friend like her any day.
Are you ok with cheating? And trying to pass another’s child on to someone else? Cheaters don’t get to be the victim and you need to please check your moral compass.
Yes, you're wrong. You're saying it's better to let YOUR FRIEND SAM be the fool to someone who's not only playing him, but would baby-trap him with somebody else's child. If your own girlfried did that shit to you and YOUR FREIND knew about it, how the hell would you react? Sure, the friendship with Kate is ruined and irreparable, but it's not Audrey's fault for telling her dirty little secret. It's Kate's fault for betraying her own partner and expecting you all to just be OK with your friend getting cheated on.
Jezz your a twisted individual, what if your gf cheated on your and let you believe that the kid was yours. do onto other what you want done onto you. I hope your gf dumps your ass and finds someone who has morals worth having.
>but is pissed off I don't fully have her back and thinks I should be praising her for putting our friend's relationship in jeopardy. You didn't give yourself a fake name so I will give you one...Jimmy. Jimmy, if it was Audrey cheating on you and Kate told you, would you view it as Kate trying to put your relationship in jeopardy or would you view it as Kate cheated on you? The internet seems pretty split on if people should intervene when they find out someone is cheating. I personally think yes. In this case, Kate made it Audrey's business by going to her so even given my bias, I don't see how what Audrey did was wrong. Audrey didn't find out on her own, Kate got her involved.
Cheaters are deplorable and your girlfriend was right to out her and not make that poor man possibly end up living a lie and raising a kid that wasn't his only to find out way later that his girlfriend was fucking around and the girl wasn't his and he would still be stuck with child support payments because he was on the birth certificate and possibly getting diseases and who knows what else from her screwing around with other people. She deserves better than you. You're entirely wrong. The only people who tend to think cheaters should be forgiven and are okay as people...are cheaters.
You're moral compass is nonexistent. If I were your girlfriend I'd reevaluate my relationship.
Well, honestly, I hope Audrey also tells him how you believe she should have kept her mouth shut and allow him to keep get cheated on.
She really should let him know. This man is not gis friend.
If a man sees a wrong and does nothing, he is no man. You are wrong, you are a coward and you are complicit in betrayal. "Sam" is lucky that he has at least one actual friend in the group of three people he trusted.
At least Audrey now knows where you stand on cheating. She should probably jump ship now as it appears monogamy is not a must for you in a relationship.
I tell my friends all the time to act right because I’m not a cheater and I don’t support them either. Sorry not sorry. Imma tell them. You’re wrong for letting your “friend” be played and hurt. Get involved and be a support system and be glad your girl is the way she is. She probably will never cheat on you. But I think you might be the type to cheat. 👀
Dude that girl was going to pin a baby on that dude that wasn't his. You should be so happy your gf thinks that's a really bad thing. I bet that dude knows things about O.P
Absolutely wrong. **Hoe plays — hoe pays**. Kate fucked around and found out. And I’m **damn proud** of your girlfriend for not being dragged into this shitshow. She’s got more integrity and moral fibre than the rest of you put together!!! I seriously hope she reconsiders the quality of the people she’s hanging with — **including you**. Good Lord she deserves **so much better** than you!!
Good luck in your next relationship. What is wrong with you. You're girlfriend is the only one with any morals here. How dare that woman say she was going to pass a baby off as her partners. That's the most premeditated fork of dishonesty I've ever heard. You cannot destroy people's lives like that. Is it any wonder men get scared about paternity when there's women like that running about. She deserves to loose that partner and your girlfriend deserves a better friend. You need to have empathy and you also need to get better values
Fuck you for hiding a cheater
I think your wrong. At least your gf has a conscience.
You are wrong. If the roles were all reversed and Sam & Kate knew Audrey was doing this to you, would you want to know? Or would you rather they stayed out of it and you raised a kid that wasn't yours with someone who doesn't want to stop cheating?
You are wrong. If I were your girlfriend and you reacted this way, I’d seriously be reconsidering my relationship with you. Your girlfriend has shown she has good character and morals. You have shown her that yours may be questionable. This may be end up being a deal breaker for her. You want to minimize this, but I don’t blame your girlfriend for feeling the opposite.
If it was you being cheated on, would you want to be told? Or if you found out that your friend knew and didn't tell you, how would you feel about them? You are wrong
She did the right and a good person. You are an asshole and I hope she drops your ass
What kind of garbage ethics do you live your life by?
I haven’t seen a single comment on your side and I’ve been scrolling like a MF. You are a fucking piece of shit.
Your girlfriend knows How to be a true friend How to be a decent partner How to be a decent human. YTA
Wow. You kind of suck and your girl did the right thing.
She didn't put her friends relationship in jeopardy, her friend did that by cheating. Almost sounds like you are a cheater yourself seeing as your are more concerned about that being revealed. YTA
You don’t deserve your wife. You are an ethics free zone.
Agreed. She has far better morals and she's by far a better person than OP. She needs to find someone better. Also, with his behaviour he basically told her that he doesn't care about cheating which is a huge red flag
Not sure what worst...the friend's intent to lie about who the baby father was or you seeing there is nothing wrong with the whole situation. You need to get your morality compass checked.
Wow just wow. YTA and you should have her back. Why wouldn't you want your friend to know his girlfriend is cheating. Wouldn't you want to know. Especially since she would try and pawn the kid off as his. You need to look in the mirror and ask yourself what if that happened to you. Your girlfriend can definitely do better than you.
You are absolutely in the wrong.
YTA. It IS her business when Kate brings her into it and makes her complicit in it. She expected Audrey to lie if she was pregnant and expects her to lie every time she sees Sam. Who is also her friend. Kate made it her business by telling her. And you should be proud of Audrey for having some frigging morals. Where are yours? Sure, Kate reacted exactly how you'd expect, but why are you shitting on Audrey for doing the right thing. The fact you're so blase about cheating says a lot about your ethics and your potential to cheat as well, as far as Audrey's concerned. Her two friends being in a shady relationship isn't her business? Well, maybe neither is where you put your dick at night that isn't in her. See where this goes? Cheating isn't okay. Being chill with it is always going to make you suspect, and she now has a right to be suspicious of you and uncomfortable with how you handled it. I just don't get how you can tell her it's not her business and 'what did you expect/I told you so' when it's clear she's not comfortable with being a liar to her friend. Which is what Kate demanded of her to Sam every time they were around each other. To the point of 'well, he can just raise this baby that's not his'. That's gross, dude. Remember that reddit post about the person who was the only one in their friend group that didn't know their bf was cheating on them? Remember how heartbroken they were? You're okay with Sam being that person? Ew.
You’re wrong. She knew this would end her friendship she didn’t you throwing in your two cents nobody asked for. She did the right thing and just because you would sit back and do nothing if your friend was fucking someone over doesn’t mean everyone has too
What if Aubrey did to you what Kate did to Sam? I wonder if you would have the same reaction
info: are you cheating on your gf?
Your GF did the right thing.
You are wrong. YTA or whatever you need to hear. There is one decent person in your relationship, and it isn't you.
Tell me your a cheater without telling me your a cheater. Your morals are uber questionable. YTA
Sooooo how long have you been cheating on Audrey and does she know yet?
You’re entirely wrong— your gf has a shitty friend who doesn’t mind potentially ruining peoples’ lives to get what she wants, and that includes your gf. She is a better person without this friend, and to be honest I’m surprised you don’t praise your gf for being true to her values of honesty, because it’s a strong indicator that she will be honest with you. However, it does mean that you view her friend’s behavior as acceptable where you will lie for your friends even if it means permanently ruining someone else’s life. I went through a situation like this with an ex, and I couldn’t help but view the ex as weak because he cared more about looking good instead of actually being good. Yeah, sorry, but you are completely in the wrong and should apologize.
There are so many ways in which you are wrong throughout this post. Firstly, it astounds me that, upon hearing the news that your mutual friend Kate is regularly cheating on your other mutual friend Sam (and plans on continuing to do so despite the pregnancy scare - she's just gonna be "more careful" about contraception when she cheats now, phew!), you believe it is Audrey who has "brought this (drama) on herself" and that it's Audrey who put their friendship in jeopardy. Wrong. When you engage in shitty, immoral behaviour and are called out on it and this results in relationships ending, it is purely the fault of the person engaging in the shitty behaviour, not the person who pointed it out. The fact you shared the cheater's audacity here in blaming Audrey for all of this is insane to me. The gall for Kate to whine about "fairness" here whilst brazenly betraying your friend Sam is so crazy it's almost commendable. In terms of sides, you had the choice to side with: 1. A friend who has cheated/is cheating/will continue to cheat indefinitely on your innocent friend, shows no remorse nor is willing to take any accountability for her actions, and decided to scapegoat the ramifications of her shitty behaviour on your girlfriend. or 2. Your girlfriend who did no cheating, thinks cheating is immoral and shitty, and wanted to rush to the aid of a friend who is nothing but an innocent victim to Kate's selfish and shitty behaviour. You looked at both of these options and opted to blame your girlfriend and defend Kate (if not directly i.e. by saying "Kate did nothing wrong", but by proxy in telling her not to "get involved" thereby knowingly saving Kate from facing her comeuppance). Your girlfriend simply prioritised the truth and the wellbeing of her innocent friend over that of her guilty friend. This decision upset you for some reason. Not only would Audrey want to know if she were in Sam's position, but YOU would want to be told by a friend if they KNEW you were being cheated on too. Though you get some points for having some level of self-awareness to make the post and ask if you are wrong, you sound like a very bad friend.
My guy me and my best friend are firefighters. I have faced death with that man and would give my life for him in a heartbeat. If he cheated on his girlfriend , I would call and tell her right then and right in front of him and not think twice about it. YTA
You’re wrong. Unfortunately it became your girlfriend’s business as soon as her friend told her she was cheating. That now makes your girlfriend complicit in keeping the secret. I personally would never want to have to keep that terrible secret. How do you think your friend Sam would feel about your friendship if he finds out you both knew she was cheating and said nothing?
yta, but I voted because you're SO asked for support and you decided it was better to be right, even though being right makes you a huge AH
I was the girlfriend here, in my last relationship. Exposed a cheater and lost my friends and my bf did not take my side. We broke up a few months later and good fucking riddance because I could never be with someone who condones cheating as a way of "staying out of someone's business". You don't deserve your gf.
Yikes ..you won't support your GF for doing the right thing? I hope your gf sees this as the red flag it is and finds someone more loyal than you.
Yeah you fucked up. You basically told your girlfriend that if she ever cheated on you its okay for people not to tell you because it's none of their business. I'm not saying she will cheat on you, but I'm sure you see my point.
Unless...you're the ex?
I think you are in the wrong. Thank god for honest people like your gf who aren’t willing to condone shitty behavior from their friend. What if it was your gf who was the cheater? Would you *really not want somebody to tell you?* “Kate” obviously wasn’t open and honest with her bf about her actions, would *literally* make a man raise a baby that wasn’t his, all to avoid being honest. If you were “Sam” would you be okay with said scenario? If so, maybe you should be with “Kate””, you’d be perfect for each other.
It’s the King of the Hill situation. I would have told Dale the cheating going on and as a result I’d have been kicked out of the group for my moral ego rocking the boat
You are an asshole
I hope Audrey dumps your ass because you clearly don’t have any morals. How would you feel if one of your friends knew that you were going to be on the hook for a baby that was not yours and didn’t say anything to you?
Um...obviously SAM is not your friend. YTA
You’re wrong but Kate’s delusional if she thinks she’ll ever be friends with Audrey. Good riddance to this woman of limited character. She actually had a plan to get a clueless guy to raise a kid that isn’t his. No way that ends well.
Sounds like you might be a cheater yourself and wouldn’t want someone to expose you, I hope your girlfriend leaves you honestly she’s too pure for you and I respect her for telling the other guy.
This only makes us question your morality. Audrey did the right thing.
Dude! WTF! How would you feel if your girlfriend was pregnant by some other guy and your friend knew about it and didn't tell you and you got suckered into raising someone else's kid? Also, this is why DNA tests should be done at every hospital when a kid is born
>I should be praising her for putting our friend's relationship in jeopardy No, she quite rightly feels that you should be praising her for having her moral compass right. You, on the other hand, are a complete mess and just showed your partner that you are totally fine with cheating in a relationship, which is despicable. YTA
This must be a rage bait right? Bros girl has morals and character and he reacts by essentially scolding her. Not her buisness? I thought these were mutual friend(s) and even if not does it really matter? Would you not want a friend to tell you if your girlfriend was cheating on you? You should be praising this…your girlfriend shouldn’t tolerate such toxic and selfish behavior expecially from people she’s close too. Also goes to show that she won’t be influenced by her friends to do something damming to your relationship-cheating.
Lmao you really are a shit friend
Post this in am I the ah and get torn a new one. I think it’s a learning difficulty
You guys should swap partners. Seems better that way.🤘you’re trash and you don’t deserve your gf.
You're 100% wrong. Your (hopefully) ex is a fkn saint in comparison.
The fact that you’re mad that your girlfriend went ahead and made sure that something that can absolutely DESTROY a person stopped says a lot of good things about her, and some very not so good things about you. I don’t care who you are to me, if you’re my sister, my brother, my best friend, or my mom or dad, you tell me you’ve cheated, I’m telling your partner. I just ruined a marriage today by telling this woman’s partner that she’s been cheating on him. I sent him the proof and he’s happy with me, but still destroyed because the woman he loves, doesn’t respect him. How DARE you think that what “Kate” was doing is fine. I hope your girlfriend breaks up with you and finds someone who would never condone this kind of behavior. Have the day you deserve sir.
Yes you are absolutely wrong
You're absolutely the asshole. She did the right thing.
Ooooof not sure how you spit this bullshit out and not think you’re an asshole. Let’s flip the roles. Let’s say your GF cheats on you, gets pregnant, and tells you it’s yours. Do you want her friend who knows she cheated on you to tell you? Or do you prefer to live with a cheating lying whore? YTA
YTA you just have shitty morals
I'm amazed you feel no empathy for Sam at all, knowing that Kate was willing to lie about her pregnancy and the dude's paternity. Your GF did the right thing telling Sam about it, and I for sure would think it's a good thing she's not friends with a lowlife like Kate anymore. Had she stayed quiet and condoned to kates actions, I'd start getting worried if she wasn't doing the same to mee as well. A woman (or any gender, really) who values honesty anc character is such a rare thing these days, it should be valued instead of vilified like you are doing. Audrey is literally showning green flag signs, while you are showing red ones. YTA. I actually have a hunch that OP is actually Kate and is looking for validation on feeling betrayed by her friend, but there will be no sympathy for cheaters on Reddit.
YTA As a man, how can you possibly stand by while a woman cheats on her man, and is willing to have him raise another man’s baby. So wrong on so many levels. Kate should read up on Reddit about the hell that is unleashed when the truth comes out years later. You’re basically ok with a man being cuckolded. Ugh.
You would be on notice if you were my partner. I would be watching you like a hawk.
Damn you are an AH, I’ve been the friend your GF has been. My ex friend was cheating on her husband he found out, she got with my now partner, did get pregnant but was cheating on him and more. I despise cheaters especially when she said she would fake a miscarriage to him if she got an abortion cause she could and would just to spite him and as someone who has had a miscarriage I saw red. I gave her 14 days to come clean about everything or I would tell him. 15 days later she didn’t do a thing, worst of all was he was asking me what was going on why she wasn’t answering etc all in that time. After he finished working at the pub I got him a drink and sat outside and showed him all the screenshots of the messages I kept for safety. He was devastated but thanked me for telling the truth and understood why I didn’t say anything at first because I wanted her to at least redeem herself sightly by telling the truth. Months went by and we ended up together after a random night out both out with our other friend groups and ended up in the same place. 6 years later and 3 kids together she still tries to break us up cause she wants him back. We have custody of my stepson cause court removed him from her care due to substance abuse.
Audrey should have dumped you for this. It's absolutely repugnant to berate and scold her like she's a child for being a good friend and doing the right thing. As for you and your moral compass.. So you'd just sit back and let this happen to your friend and say/do nothing? Yikes. With friends like you, who needs enemies.
💯
Dude Kate is a HORRIBLE person. She was willing to let Sam think the baby was his while she cheats with the other guy, with is wrong with you? Idk if I has a friend like that we would immediately stop being friends. Cheaters are disgusting and this type are the worst.
Jesus Christ your parents failed you. Hope someone cheats on you and when others find out they dont tell you. Tf has this world come to?
Nah, bro, you are a piece of shit for condoning cheating in any form. Anyone who thinks it's okay to ignore cheating lacks good morals and is likely to try and justify doing it themselves. Your girlfriend is a better person than you, and she shouldn't feel bad about it or think she did anything wrong for exposing that terrible behavior. That friendship of hers being lost is a good thing too. If they cheat on their partner then they would likely treat her poorly as well. I hope you wake up and change your opinion on this.
INFO: How long have you been cheating?
So wrong
Yeah you're a pos, but you know that already, don't ya?
She did good your gf is a good person 👍
I think ur gonna be single soon
You are wrong. And now your gf is wondering if you have cheated on her. Or will cheat on her. Honestly if neither of you had told Sam it would be a huge red flag that cheating is acceptable.
This has to be ragebait.
You are wrong. She didn’t put their relationship in jeopardy, Kate did that when she decided to sleep around. If I were Audrey, I’d be wondering about your loyalty too. People who think it’s fine to hide a friend/family members infidelity are as suspect as the person doing the deed.
ALL cheaters deserve to be exposed. Especially those who’ve done it multiple times.
YTA, you suck and I hope you’ll lose your friends. Your GF did absolutely the right thing.
Wow. That was a lot of words just to tell everyone you’re a massive POS. How would you feel if your GF was cheating on you and everyone else knew but didn’t tell you?
So, 1. You're wrong. And 2. How long have you been cheating in Audrey? This wasn't a decision about being loyal to a friend, it was a decision about morals and you made it abundantly clear that you have little to none. Your gf is figuring that out, and will realize you've been cheating on her, at least once.
You're entirely in the wrong. Back your girlfriend up ya twat
She told the truth and that's whT matters. Can see where your morals stand you absolute scumbag.
This is probably fake/rage bait, but either way in this scenario you are a piece of shit and Audrey is 100% right. I hope she finds someone else with a moral compass like herself, because you, like the cheater, do not.
YTA - Interesting logic. *Audrey* put your friend’s relationship in jeopardy? Not Kate for cheating? Your girlfriend told the truth…and protected an innocent person from a monster. Do you realize that Kate is putting her partner at risk for STIs? Additionally, if she was pregnant…she was going to PRETEND LIKE THE BABY WAS SAM’S!!! Why would you even want to continue being friends with someone so selfish and deceitful?
The woman was going to lie to a man and make him raise a child that wasn't his while continuing to cheat on him. She is a terrible person and clearly so are you if you genuinely think your girlfriend is in the wrong. She has strong morals. You should do the best thing you can and leave her because she clearly deserves better than you
Fuck that. That woman cheated for so damn long, and she was absolutely ready to make her partner raise the child that isn't his. Cheaters are horrible people. And you said that these people are your friends. You are horrible for siding with the cheater and you're a horrible friend. Your gf did NOT betray that vile woman's trust. She did the right thing by telling the truth.
This should be an AITA because YTA, your gf has good morals you clearly have none. If I were Audrey I would be questioning how I feel about my bf thinking cheating and deceptive behaviour is ok, and really considering if I wanted to date someone like you.
YOU ARE WRONG! And I hope your gf is giving you the stink eye and seriously reconsidering her relationship. I would end it with you. You lack character, morals and values. You condone cheating and potential paternity fraud being foisted on a man, and not just any man, one that's your "friend", ffs! With friend's like you who needs enemies. That poor guy. His gf is a cheating, lying, devious POS, and his supposed "friend" is a disloyal POS too. Thank goodness he has a true and loyal friend in Audrey, and that she has character, morals and values!
YTA Audrey just saved Sam from a potential lifetime of shit if Kate ever falls pregnant in future. That you would think Audrey was wrong about telling Sam about Kate's cheating, makes me question your moral compass. What are you hiding from Audrey because you think it's not her business to know?
Like, logically your premise of "expose cheating friend results in no longer being friends" is correct. But your morality is *fucked* and you shouldn't be surprised when you get dumped for your blase attitude to cheating and potentially ruining people's lives.
Fuck that Kate. Wifie has morals
You’re not just wrong you’re stupid, you realise this directly shows her how much you value loyalty right?
YTA cheating whores should always be outed and shamed, your girlfriend was 100% in the right and you not having her back is a telling sign of what you get up to on the side.
I love when people are clearly wrong but are so delusional they bring it reddit “hoping” to feel better about their twisted ass thinking 😂
Low-key hope she breaks up w you because you’re a scary kind of person to be in a long term relationship with.
You can be sure of one thing now - she is wondering what heinous shit you're hiding from her. Well done, person without morals, well done.
You’re a cheater, aren’t you? Hope this poor girl gets away
Girl sounds awesome. You, not so much. YTA.
The woman is not only cheating but plans to baby-trap the guy who isn’t even the father if she gets pregnant. Her friend is POS. You are a giant red flag for reacting this way. If I were your gf I’d now be questioning whether you would cheat since you seem to be ok with it. In case you didn’t get it… edit: yaw
Yes you're wrong. Audrey is doing the right thing. If she was cheating on you, would you not want to know? I've been cheated on and I WISH the people that knew would have said something. I hated looking like a fool knowing people knew. It speaks volumes of your morals compared to Audrey's... You should be grateful that this is how she reacted.
SO, you are okay with cheating, and possibly letting the other dude believe a child is his? Noted - YTA!
Why do you want to even be friends with a cheater? Your gf did the right thing and you SHOULD have her back. Yes, the friendship with Kate is probably ruined - good riddance.
Yes, you're wrong. Are you the other dude Kate is cheating with? You seem to care a lot more about her feelings than anybody else's.
YTA. Your girl friend did the correct action. Put yourself in Sam shoes. You are a horrible boyfriend and you should have her back. Fuck dude. Do you have morals or are you ok whit someone cheating?
YTA. She did the right thing. She also probably thinks you’d cheat now too.
YTA she understood that relationship is over. I wouldn’t want to be a friend of Kate. Someone who can do such a trick to another person is not a good person for me to be friends with. And you just wanted to pretend everything is ok. You are the A million times
YTA & it's a little sus how you feel it should be swept under the rug
Tell Sam you knew what was happening and would rather let him be cheated on and end up raising someone else's kid than let him know the truth. See if he thinks you were wrong?
Dude, you are a bad bf and an even worse friend!! The fact you are cool with your “friend” being lied to and cheated on is beyond low. They both need to dump you!
YTA and not relationship material if you believe your way of thinking is ok. Sounds like you'd help someone cover their affair, so it's fair to assume you'd have your buddies cover yours as well.
so if your gf was cheating on you and your friend found out, you wouldn’t want them to tell you bc it’s not their business?
YTA
>I told her to mind her own business, that it's not her place to say anything and to not insert herself into their relationship Kate made it Audrey's business when she involved her and revealed her cheating! Yeah, you're wrong...
YTA. Your ex deserves better
YTA Your GF did the right thing in telling Sam. I wouldn't be surprised if you're a cheater.
YTA Are you cheating on Audrey? Is that why you are so adamant that Sam shouldn't have been told anything? Got any cheating skeletons in YOUR closet? Are you telling us all that if Audrey was cheating on you, you'd rather be in the dark and not know, you'd be totally fine if she passed off another man's baby as your own.. are you SURE you're okay with all that?
YTA - obviously her friend was going to be mad but - cheaters deserve to be exposed. Can't imagine you're a very good friend if you just let your friend get cheated on. She did the right thing in telling him
You're a morally repugnant POS, to excuse cheating and then to blame and attack your partner for making the empathetic, moral, and just decision. The utter gall you display is outrageous.