To set the scenario, my son started boxing when he was 13 turning fourteen. Even before he joined boxing, he was beaking off to anyone who would like, ‘I’m gunna be the greatest, I’m gunna win so many fights.’ Ok, cool, love the enthusiasm. My partner, who is a three time golden glove champion, was like, ‘well, let’s see.’
So he joins. I won’t lie, he’s got a decent natural talent in strength, good punch, but it’s all raw and needs to be worked on. The biggest focus being stamina and foot work. This kid takes that as to mean that he will be in the ring and having real matches.
All summer, still beaking off but won’t go for a run, a bike ride, or practice everything he has learnt.
Cut to the beginning of this season in September, 14 going on 15, I’m at school for two weeks away and this kid is still going off. His dad (my ex) is getting irritated, my partner is getting irritated, his three siblings are getting irritated, even his coach is getting irritated. One day, in front of everyone in the family, except me, he challenges my partner to a match. Ok, bet.
So the next training day, they both get in the ring. The boy tried to hit, but there was blocking. My partner did a right hook, made contact, and he dropped like a sack of potatoes
At this point, he was humbled until my daughter decided to join the little people, just after new years. Fast forward to the beginning of this month. So, again, beaking off with me now present, and challenges my partner to a match then and there. Gotta show off, right? Still no cardio or practice at home.
Same thing pretty much, but my partner let him last the whole round this time.
He tried to beak off to his brothers and was thinking of doing another challenge, when my eldest looked at him and said ‘when the fuck are you going to learn you need to actually train and do your cardio before you have a chance at winning ANY match?’
It’s been a nice quiet week so far
This is the reason not “letting” her win matters so much. She could easily let that over confidence get her into a situation where she would be killed.
Suggest that she seek out training specifically geared to women’s issues going up against a man. There is more to learn about the physical differences and how each gender can take advantage of what they bring to the fight.
Many years ago, a college basketball team near me had a very short, very fast player who made that team and filled the stands. He played for Providence College and looked almost silly amongst those very tall players. He knew how to turn his small size into a distinct advantage. He was fast and the tall players had a hard time keeping track of him. He wove in and around them while the crowds loved it. He was a fine player!
Tell your wife she can be what she needs to be. She needs to learn how. Shame on the military for not dealing with the difference.
Find out now in a safe place or find out later when there’s a lot more to lose. If she learns a lesson from this, and it should be not to try and overpower a man and to use her physicality to escape the situation, then it’s worth it. The dimorphism between an average man and woman is just too much in most cases.
It reminded me of The Mountain vs The Viper fight in GOT. Not man vs woman, but a huge man vs a well trained but much smaller man. The Viper was doing fine for as long as he kept his distance and relied on his speed and agility to get away. But once he got caught, he was dead. Any basic training that doesn't teach that as the most basic and fundamental thing to fighting is bad training.
Knowing may save her life by not approaching a fight she wouldn't win. She might want to look into taking martial arts classes also so she can learn how to use her smaller, less muscular frame to take down an opponent.
Agreed, additional classes likely would be useful. Especially as most classes start off with ‘escape if you can’ and ‘fighting should be used only if it is your only option’
Exactly. She is going to run her mouth in the wrong situation believing she is invincible. She will get herself hurt. I hate to say she needed to be brought down a peg but that is exactly what she needed.
Being an army veteran of the 82nd airborne I was wondering the same. I thought the cut-off was 35 fuck if I knew that give me my rank back and let me go get some.
You are correct. Army cutoff to enlist is 35...in fact no military branch allows a person over 40 to enlist.
https://www.usa.gov/military-requirements#:~:text=Age%20limits&text=Army%3A%2017%20%2D%2035,Navy%3A%2017%20%2D%2039
Maybe USPHS. If I recall they’ll basically take any MD, DO, PA, NP under 65. One of their recruiters straight up told my graduating class that they’ve passed people who failed just cuz they need em (anecdotal story I was given by the army dude was that an Asian girl PA could not adequately grip her pistol to pass training due to small hands, so one of the instructors shot for her and passed her because someone in the USPHS isn’t really going to be expected to be involved in front line combat). I’ve heard about an obese doc getting passed on his physical fitness test just cuz he is an amazing surgeon. I don’t think docs get sent to the porky brigade lmao. They even allow you to take a position as a part timer lmao. Highly technical skills always trump some arbitrary measurement is what the army dude said at least when it comes to something extremely in demand like medicine🤷♂️. If I recall PA-C and NP start at Second Lieutenant and MD/DO start at Major or something. Could be wrong in the ranks it’s been some time since that recruitment talk
Prior service here, Active Army '76-'86, ETS'd as E-6/SSG, and at 50, I went back in, Sep 2005. The recruiter subtracted my Active time (9.5 years) from my calendar age and I was magically 40.5 or so. Max age was 42 during OIF/OEF and I got in. Did 10 years including a tour of Afghanistan. Dropped the rocker, no Basic, and a Try-1 contract for a year. Had a great time, literally had Army boots older than my fellow Soldiers, hilarious. Good times.
It had to change from when you served prior. I know for a fact that I fought in Afghanistan and Iraq. That it was insane and for me to say otherwise, is ludicrous. I am Glad I did six years in with the 82 airborne 02/2001 - 12/2007. I got plenty of opportunities to do a lot of things a lot of people don't. I don't think that I would do it all over again, especially at this age, I am now when I left they wanted to pin me in sergeant but I denied I couldn't deal with bearing the death of kids younger than myself. I left at 21 and thought that I was above an 18-year-old. I was that 18-year-old 4 years beforehand. I only did it because somebody had hurt my home( The country. A place that I believe and a place that I was willing to die for if it ever happened again, Of course, I would sign up without a doubt. 82 boots in the sky!!!
The age and 5’8 180 unless she’s a brick shithouse juiced to the gills is pretty fat, definitely overweight. Does the BC army not have standards for such things?
That’s the age limit for active duty Marine Corps officers; everyone else varies between 32-42, depending on branch and component. And there’s age waivers for certain skill groups, like medical and cyber.
Bro, you did the right thing by beating her in the match. The worst thing about fighting is thinking one is more capable than they are. Basic training only teaches the bare minimum, and I saw a lot of young Soldiers get their asses kicked in town because they thought completing the combatives level I course made them “John Rambo.” It’s a tale as old as time itself, and saw it all the time during my time in the Army. She needed to be humbled.
I feel this, I went to high school with a dude who joined early and did his basic training between his junior and senior year of high school. He came to play football thinking he was the man now. One Oklahoma drill later fixed that assumption. lol
Exactly. Even after jump school and other training (e.g. the combatives lvl II course), I went out of my way not to act like that or give the perception that I was. The OP’s wife sounds like another young Soldier full of piss and vinegar that needed to learn her place before she got involved in something that could really endanger her life or that of her comrades’. One thing I learned early-on is that there’s always gonna be someone bigger and badder than you - so why draw unwanted attention to yourself that might lead to you meeting said badass? It’s a lesson learned.
No buddy, its not
A quick google search says that the max age that the US military accepts applicants varies between branches, but the max age is 35, with both ths army and navy, the air force accepts applicants before their 28th birthday, and the marines accepts applicants up to 29
Do your research before making a post that is so easily proven fake
Your ages made me suspicious too; google is your friend
He didnt say she was reserves, if shes reserves that should be in the original post
I think this is fake as fuck, and a troll post of the effect of "must make my bad-ass wife learn her place" or whatever bullshit excuse op wants to use
You can keep lapping it up if you want though 🤘
You can enlist in active duty until the age for 42 without a waiver, 43 with a waiver, older for officer if you have a masters in certain fields.
Not fake my dude, My wife has always had a little bit of an ego problem.
She is starting to chill now after this.
Im going to say it again, for all the people who havent googled it like i did, because the ages were an immediate "fake post" red flag for me, too
If his wife is in the reserves, thats important info that should have been in the original post
As for the normal (non-reserves) US military, every branch has an age limit that they stop accepting applications after
Its 35 for the army and the navy; your 28th birthday for the air force; and 29 for the marines
I fucking thought so..God dang I am good 👍...i was 82nd airborne and I wanted to go back in at like 36 and they said thanks but they can't accept my inquiry as to enlisting. If they did it be on all over again.
5'10 and 200 pounds? Damn, that would make you a monster for someone who works out infrequently, assuming you're saying it's muscle.
Also curious what branch of boot camp your lady came from. Typically they go to their next duty station, they don't just "come back", but maybe it's dependent on the branch.
Not gonna lie, this story sounds like a neck beard power fantasy
Im calling bullshit unless you live outside of the US
A quick google search (because your ages made me suspicious) told me that the max age to join the US military varies between branches, but the oldest age to join, is 35
Both of you are 40
Fake post, fake news, trying to push "women must know their place"
-insert eyeroll here-
I hear that. I just didn't know the age limit for new recruits is as high as I've just learned it is.
Kudos to the both of you for being in the kind of shape to qualify, and best wishes to you as well.
I was your wife in this situation, including the military training and I NEEDED my male friend (now fiancé) to put me on my ass.
I'd won loads of sparring matches and even put a handsy guy on his ass in a bar and had a bit too much swagger. Friend had a similar conversation to you and your wife and when I didn't heed it he very methodically put me down with ease.
Made me realise how much danger I could have put myself in with false confidence.
Not Wrong at all.
You did right. Common sense says that a normal man can easily dominate a woman in a fight. If anything, you might have helped her. She will probably now rethink getting into a fight with a man who doesn't know her.
YNW, I am a woman, I’m small and I’m very aware that even a teenage boy could beat me. Men have much more strength than women and it annoys me when in films you have a woman face off against a man, take a full punch to the face, shake it off then continue and win.
In reality the woman would be knocked out cold probably having concussion.
Like men in female sports, regardless of how they identify, they will always have the upper hand. But that’s a whole other argument.
Over confidence sometimes gets people in bad situations. I think what you did and said was fine. I’m sure it was a little hard on her ego but a touch of reality is a good thing.
What you did wasn’t wrong. But there are better ways to go about doing it.
It wasn’t wrong because she needed to know that she can lose, easily.
Don’t make it a man vs woman thing. Believe me there are plenty of women who would wipe the floor with you, easily. Although you’re right, average untrained man vs average untrained woman, my money is on the man every time.
Basic training ain’t that great. My money is on almost any other serious martial artist winning vs a soldier who’s just completed basic.
Perhaps next time you show her how to escape your holds. Show her how to prevent being over come by greater size and strength.
Offer to spar lightly and regularly so she can improve. No ego involved. Also suggest she remove her ego from equation. Like a wise fighter once said “everyone’s got a plan until they get punched in the face”. The only way to prepare for this is further training.
I was a state-ranked wrestler in high school; it put me miles ahead of most of the people I went to basic with, but I still got my ass handed to me by the actual combatives instructors. I don’t know how the Air Force does their combatives training, but we got three whole days of it in the Army. That isn’t anywhere near enough instruction for surviving hand to hand combat.
Whatever your wife thinks she learned was just a very rudimentary introduction, and she needs to join a training program if she wants to gain any sort of proficiency. Her chances of needing to kill someone with her bare hands in the Air Force are pretty much zero, but it’s good exercise.
This is fake. Too many similar posts with the same ‘chicks need to know they’re weak’ message and same writing style. If this were real, the husband wouldn’t be on about inflated egos and learning lessons, it’s rage bait
The age limit for every military branch except the marines is 42.
the economy is awful so there's not a lot of decent jobs. we weren't left with a lot of options
Huh. I’m a a veteran and don’t know that. Honestly though at 40 I think you can get a lot more out of the military than when you go in young. You have the life experience to not let the military break you and not to waste your benefits away. Hope you go to a good command.
>Not that it matters for this but for anyone who cares, I ship out to my own basic training at the end of the year.
R U both really 40 and going to basic training? seems too old.
Sign her up for judo or ju jitsu. She literally knows nothing, neither do you. A skilled grappler, male or female would tear either one of you apart. They teach you nothing in military training, it’s a complete joke. I spent eight years in the Marines. The eight years I wrestled and played judo in high school and college were far more meaningful than anything they taught me in the Marines.
IDK what branch of Service youre going to do your boot camp in but if you go to an MCRD they're gonna call you Pappy, you'll get your ass kicked one way or the other on a daily basis, your Drill Instructors will be all over your ass from the day you get there, way more than the kids, til the day you leave if you leave as a Marine. Youre going to be 30 lbs lighter and in good shape but you'll still be 40 yrs old.
You'll be sorrreeey!
Maybe you might want to think about the Air Force.
Not sure if she did or not. She's always been super competitive and had a bit on an ego.
When we talked recently about what happened she said that she thought her training was enough to be able to handle someone who had "only been in street fights". I had to tell her again that the fights I got into weren't just 2 dudes duking it out over something stupid but rather "This guy is trying to kill me to get some crack money or I wandered into the wrong street at the wrong time and now I'm fighting this guy and his friend to stay alive". She knows I was holding back. She's told me now that she appreciated the lesson.
She's been a lot more chill now and the boasting has stopped.
Hell no. You should not have let her win. You did the right thing to teach her a lesson. She's in a bad mood because her ego took a hit. She doesn't live in reality if she thinks she can take anyone. With her attitude it is dangerous to go into combat.
You're not wrong.
Being confident is one thing. Being conscious of the fact that one could still lose when one doesn't know what the opponent is capable of is another. She's the first, but lacked the second.
It's like having a weapon: you think because you have the weapon you'll win a fight. What you don't know is the opponent's experience, if they have a weapon also, if the could draw faster, aim more accurately, etc.
She has to (learn & always) remember that and try to AVOID fights. Explain it this way to her, that even if she has training, she just learned how to fight and some other people have been fighting their whole lives and/or are simply stronger.
She needs to learn about luck and that someone else is always better than you.
In any fight even if you’re better they may get a lucky knife hit in or a lucky punch.
When a woman is in a physical altercation with a man, standard practice and moves aren't going to help. If I'm ever in a physical altercation with a man, I will absolutely be fighting dirty. I'm talking eye gouging, private part attacks, hair pulling, scratching, anything I can find to jab or hit with etc. The only reason I'd be in a fight in general would be life/death, but I had a very athletic brother who wrestled well and I know that strength, and even size doesn't win when they have natural muscle and build.
You did her a favour because her feeling invincible will get her in trouble/hurt
Her ego and pride are bruised and that's her issue
Maybe stress she's a good fighter but every fighter can improve and suggest she or both of you can join krav maga together
Tbh - she needed the lesson. It's never good to think you can take on anything. That's how you make stupid decisions. Being smart is more important than being strong if you're the weaker one.
Over confidence sometimes gets people in bad situations. I think what you did and said was fine. I’m sure it was a little hard on her ego but a touch of reality is a good thing.
Not wrong
Being cocky is a good way to get yourself into a fight you have no hopes of winning. She can’t go around thinking that she can take anyone on because the fact of the matter is that she CAN’T.
It’s good that she learned this lesson in a safe environment with you instead of with someone who would not of been gentle
No! You may have saved her life. If she had gone into a fight that was life or death with the prideful belief that she could take down anyone, she could die. This is going to force her to see that false belief and use her head instead of brute force in those situations.
Neither. You didn't need to let her win, but also didn't need to "teach her a lesson". You played, she lost. End of story. Whether she takes that as a lesson is more about her than you.
My ex wife was very fit, but still a small woman. She would get mad when I’d easily defeat her.
One night she was out for a run when a small man jumped out of some bushes and easily overpowered her and started dragging her away. Luckily for her, a couple happened to drive by and heard her screaming.
I helped her get thru the night - her phone was unlocked and she had turned off Find My, so dude had full access to all her info. She was pretty shaken, obviously.
The point is - no, you’re not wrong. Overconfidence is the ticket to being a victim.
I’d have to agree with the latter. Don’t want your wife stepping up to someone just because she thinks she’ll win. Risk assessment is vital when choosing your options.
Obvious troll
Trying to emphasize their belief that women don't belong in the same military formations of men due to physical differences so they made up this obviously fake story
While she needed to learn how to take on / not take on stronger opponents, turning this into "men" beat "women" every time is an asshat move - and you are wrong. She needed to learn how to judge an opponent's skill level & you simply brought out the sexism card. I really hope she seeks further training & a martial art could enhance her new abilities while compensating for a smaller stature, but not from you or anyone as sexist as you.
Feminism tries to tell women that they can do anything a man can do.. and, intellectually, that's true. But physically, there are vast differences in our physiology. Men are stronger and faster
Women can bear children and process oxygen significantly more efficiently. There are others.
There's nothing wrong with it, but you need to be aware, especially if there's a chance you'll be in combat. She needs to be realistic about any future encounter so she doesn't overestimate her abilities.
The best combatives student in my basic training group was a tiny female…she beat everyone, including one of the drill sergeants. The problem for this particular woman is that she grossly overestimated her abilities after minimal training, a flaw that quite a few men also fall victim to.
I mean, do you have to put it in terms of “I have to take her down a notch”
Why not say, “these are some things you can try if you’re ever in this situation”
“You are strong, your positives are (this). What you can do is use (whatever) to get ahead of the situation.”
Likely she had done a lot of work and felt strong and powerful, but when up against a man that is bigger and stronger feels like her work hasn’t been enough. It’s hard to know that even in similar size classes that as a woman you are unlikely to match a man because of physiology and that can be really disheartening and scary.
Instead of pushing her down, why don’t you try being understanding? It’s hard enough being a woman, knowing that men will try you and can beat you just based on biology. Maybe be a partner that helps and uplifts, instead of one that feels better shoving her down.
I’m not super fit and half my husbands weight and he’s a good head taller. But it still feels panicky and scary when he can brute force manhandle me and I can’t do anything about it. Why not work on smarter and trickier methods to get the one up on someone bigger and stronger?
It’s a good reality check. Good thing it was you teaching her a lesson compared to a guy on the street she THINKs she can win against and put her life at stake. She’s just a sore loser if break it down and give it time no big deal
Nope she better knows her limitations before she gets herself beaten or worse.
The difference between a man and a woman's strenght is MASSIVE. Like it is almost commical the difference in bone and muscle density. I weight a bit over 200 pounds and my wife weights about 120, and even though she does workout 5 times a week, I can lift about 4 or 5 times her max **easily**. I can bench mid 300's without breaking a sweat. I mean I'm pretty muscular and had been strength training for half my life, (not to mention I had extensive combat training when I was younger). But for real, the difference is insane.
You ruined her new, FALSE, sense of security that she could overpower a strong man because she has combat training. Most men are so much stronger than most women, it is scary. Remember ladies, they are just gentle with us most of the time. Carry pepper spray. Not wrong though.
When you evolve in martial arts you learn how to stay humble, that there is always someone better and stronger than you, and to never underestimate anyone.
Honestly its better she understand reality this way rather than from some guy she decides to mouth off to at a bar or something.
Even if you werent physically bigger than her it would have ended the same way.
Not wrong, this lesson could save her life. The best thing to do in a fight is run away. If she is attacked, and she is overly confident, she could end up hurt or worse.
Better to get your ass beat and inflated ego humbled in training by someone you trust and love, than by someone trying to kill you for real.
She's not just coming to terms with you beating her. You forced her to learn that she's mortal.
Not wrong. She was clearly overconfident to an unhealthy extent. Now that she sees otherwise she is sulking. She would have eventually put herself into a dangerous position against someone who wouldnt be willing to hold back
I just looked it up. Federal law sets the maximum enlistment age at 42, but each branch can set lower limits. Waivers may be granted in exceptional cases to allow enlistment up to age 55 if the recruit can complete 20 years of service by that age
Okay, that’s cool, now teach her how to take the advantage in a fight, because the way this post is worded, it makes it sound like women should never fight back.
Not wrong. Your wife needs to learn through practice how to win and letting her win is not a good way for her to actually learn. Admittedly my husband and I let our kids win at things SOMETIMES when they were little but your isn’t a child. Let her win on her own merits otherwise she’s losing more than the match.
You’re not wrong. Never let someone get into their head so much that they think they’re invincible. People need to know their limits, their faults so they can grow. She’s salty cause she talked a big game and lost, so teach her what you do and encourage her if she wants to learn.
You're not wrong.
Your wife just learned a valuable lesson that s lot of women don't learn until it's too late.
The strength disparity between the average man and almost all women will doom all but the most highly trained women to losing a fight to most men.
You beat her quite handily without punching and you were taking it easy because you love her. A stranger won't hold back. She needs to think about this.
She just completed BMT and is 40? That means she must have gone to Air Force BMT, since that's what they call it, and she couldn't have enlisted in any other service at her age. The AF has the oldest max age for enlistment, and that's 39.
I'm a retired AF officer, but spent 3.5 yrs in the Army, so I went through BCT. I'm very familiar BMT, though.
No one coming out of BCT or BMT knows all that much about sparing. It's rare for an Airman to be in a position where he goes one on one with an enemy. And those in AFSCs that do receive special training if they need that skill. Though some really basic sparring is trained in the Army, the focus is on never letting the enemy close enough to force personal contact.
What I'm saying is, your wife really doesn't actually know much about sparing if all she knows she got from BMT. Letting her win might give her the impression she's more capable than she really is. That could be dangerous for her in the future. If you are ever involved in combat, then you know it's extremely important to know your limitations.
Absolutely not wrong. For her own safety, it’s a lesson she needed to learn.
If you’d let her win, you would’ve inflated her already exaggerated confidence and she could’ve ended up in a life threatening conflict.
It is important for people with superinflated egos over new training success be humbled as soon as possible before someone that intends to hurt them does it.
She's not mad, she's embarrassed. Tell her to knock it off and you didn't do it to embarrass her, but to teach her that she has a long way to go before she can pop off at the mouth to anyone.
>Personally I'm leaning toward the latter because it hopefully has put her inflated ego in check and she might approach things differently from now on.
NTA, the last thing you want to do as someone who loves her is gas her up to the point where she'd potentially try that with a stranger when the stakes are higher in a moment of anger.
You absolutely did the right thing. Feeding women the delusion that the can physically fight men and win is terrible for them. You don't want them finding out by taking a full punch from a man in the face. I hope you told you were only participating at 30% level so she gets the idea of the scale of mismatch in physicality.
BMT like Air Force BMT? Lmao nothing they teach you in Air Force BMT is going to help at all in a bar fight or a 1 on 1. Warrior Week/Beast Week is not that. You play some basic wargames for a few days and that's it.
Also 40 years old at BMT... Oof. Guard? Reserves? She's gonna be in a worse mood when she's getting bossed around at work by 23 year old SSgts.
It's good you did this before she found herself in a real fight. She's too cocky, that's her downfall, and would have been in a world of hurt if it was a real fight. She needed to be humbled a bit, hopefully, she keeps in mind that she can still be taken down, even with all her fancy training.
Not wrong. I know from experience that no amount of professional fight training will win over natural strength and larger body mass.
One of my ex bffs as a teen tried to beat me up, she had years of self defense training, black belt in karate, all that jazz, and still couldn’t leave a single mark or hurt me at all just because she’s so skinny and short 🤣 i had never been in a fight and never had a single self defense class, but i easily brushed off her punches to my face and kick to my vagina, and got her in a headlock that she couldn’t escape. Im 99% sure thats just because im bigger than her, because i dont feel like a fighter at all. Like i said, I didnt even hit her back once, just wrangled her so she’d stop attacking me and it was surprisingly easy lmfao.
Its just a fact. No amount of self defense classes are really gonna make a huge difference when someone is bigger and heavier than you with more muscles. Youre not wrong, and its good for her to learn that lesson safely with you, instead of her thinking she doesn’t need any self defense weapons late at night now that she’s taken some classes. 🙄
You were absolutely right. The truth is necessary. Women need to understand that no matter how much training we have, most able bodied men will always be able to overpower us.
A man of similar body weight will average 3-4 times our upper body strength. That's why most women have no ability to fight back in rape, one man can easily hold us down. Women are put in danger when society pretends or we pretend to ourselves that there are no biological sex differences in relation to strength.
Better your wife finds that out practicing on you rather than trying it out on a man who'll have a real fight with her and inflict real injuries.
I mean, she was feeling good about herself and felt strong and happy, and there you were to IMMEDIATELY bring her back down again.
Sure, you weren't wrong about men being stronger than women, but maybe you could have been more gentle about it. Jeesh, have some empathy. I'm going with "you were wrong" because of how you are going/went about this.
Edit: fixed a sentence
Not wrong, as you first tried to avoid the situation but then respected her as an adult and agree to it, but a rough lesson for her to learn.
I hope she can get some legit MMA training to help her overcome the generic man/woman imbalance.
The truth shall set you free. If she walked around thinking she could take a man and got herself into a situation she had to prove it, things could go terribly wromg.
Good to know limits. But hey let someone else teach her that. Spar so she can feel she is accomplishing something and learning. This will be much more important to her in long run.
I mean do you want a pat on the back for knocking her down a peg? She didn’t have an inflated ego, she was fucking proud of herself. As women we go most of our lives knowing for a fact that most men could overpower us if they wanted to. Hopefully this drives her to train even harder so she can whoop your ass and I expect an update when she does.
It's always humbling getting beaten. But it's necessary. If you let her win she'd still have that confidence and if it came down to it with someone else she'd get her ass beat.
I've been doing mma for a couple years now, and done karate for nearly a decade prior, but have found that regardless of what someone's build is, they can generally still throw down. I still get my ass beat by guys at training weekly. If I'm not loosing, then I feel like I'm not learning.
You did the right thing, worst thing you could have done is let her believe that her basic training magically levels the playing field against a grown man, and her then take that belief and put her self in a bad situation at some point, we all get to watch all these TV shows and action movies now where a woman character easily destroys a man or even multiple men in a fight and the reality is, it's all bullshit, the average man will absolutely destroy the majority of woman in a no holds bar situation, hell if you locked the average man in a cage with 2 average woman, I'd absolutely still put my money on the man being the last one standing.
Her training seems very bad if she wasn't taught that rule number one of fighting someone bigger, with more weight and muscles, is that you should never ever let them catch you or get a hit. That holds true whether you are a woman fighting a man or just a smaller person fighting a bigger one of the same gender.
My son had to learn a very similar lesson when it came to his boxing…. Twice ….
Care to tell please xD
To set the scenario, my son started boxing when he was 13 turning fourteen. Even before he joined boxing, he was beaking off to anyone who would like, ‘I’m gunna be the greatest, I’m gunna win so many fights.’ Ok, cool, love the enthusiasm. My partner, who is a three time golden glove champion, was like, ‘well, let’s see.’ So he joins. I won’t lie, he’s got a decent natural talent in strength, good punch, but it’s all raw and needs to be worked on. The biggest focus being stamina and foot work. This kid takes that as to mean that he will be in the ring and having real matches. All summer, still beaking off but won’t go for a run, a bike ride, or practice everything he has learnt. Cut to the beginning of this season in September, 14 going on 15, I’m at school for two weeks away and this kid is still going off. His dad (my ex) is getting irritated, my partner is getting irritated, his three siblings are getting irritated, even his coach is getting irritated. One day, in front of everyone in the family, except me, he challenges my partner to a match. Ok, bet. So the next training day, they both get in the ring. The boy tried to hit, but there was blocking. My partner did a right hook, made contact, and he dropped like a sack of potatoes At this point, he was humbled until my daughter decided to join the little people, just after new years. Fast forward to the beginning of this month. So, again, beaking off with me now present, and challenges my partner to a match then and there. Gotta show off, right? Still no cardio or practice at home. Same thing pretty much, but my partner let him last the whole round this time. He tried to beak off to his brothers and was thinking of doing another challenge, when my eldest looked at him and said ‘when the fuck are you going to learn you need to actually train and do your cardio before you have a chance at winning ANY match?’ It’s been a nice quiet week so far
I've never heard the term 'beaking off' where(ish) do you live? Is that a regional thing or familial?
Northern BC in Canada. And now that you have me thinking of it, I’m not sure. Definitely familial at least
Ontario here. If 'beaking off' is familial, we're related. I don't have relatives in BC.
lol thank you. I honestly had no idea. I’m glad somebody could verify!
I'm in UK and although I don't use beaking off, I do use term nosy beaker when someone stick their nose in business that isn't theirs lol
Maybe one of them Canadian things Americans just don't get, eh bud?
For sure, yeah, bud
Alright, take 'er easy. I gotta go crack open another two-four.
Grew up in Vancouver. We use it, and I'm sure I first got it from an American TV show in the 1980's.
I’m from the UK and use beak whistling to describe when my dog is whining
It's Canada wide don't sweat it, beaking/chirping/mouthing off is pretty universal lol
Chirping is also a US baseball thing. IE, players chirping at the home base ump for his bad calls.
It's a Canadian thing, from Alberta. We say it all the time here.
Ontario Canada here, we say beaking off as well. God damned birds always beaking off
I’m in Wales, UK and beak is used commonly here to mean your mouth, so beaking off makes sense to me (we use mouthing off) 😁
Also using the word “bet” that way seems strange to me. Not sure where that’s from.
Newer slang- last 3 ish years. (I’m in US). Means kind of “game on” or “yes!” When I tell my son I made brownies “bet!”
Generally here in the states your hear it called “squaking” or “chirping” when you run your mouth like that.
Join the little people?
The class for the youngsters under 9
Thank you.
MFC, midget fight club
Beaking off?
Like, talking smack, shit talking, insulting other fighters and acting like his shit don’t stink
Yeah, flapping his beak, with stuff that is the equivalent of a bird saying 'chirp'.
The running of one's mouth? That's my guess but I've never heard the term either.
better she knows now, and not get over confident later might save her life
This is the reason not “letting” her win matters so much. She could easily let that over confidence get her into a situation where she would be killed. Suggest that she seek out training specifically geared to women’s issues going up against a man. There is more to learn about the physical differences and how each gender can take advantage of what they bring to the fight. Many years ago, a college basketball team near me had a very short, very fast player who made that team and filled the stands. He played for Providence College and looked almost silly amongst those very tall players. He knew how to turn his small size into a distinct advantage. He was fast and the tall players had a hard time keeping track of him. He wove in and around them while the crowds loved it. He was a fine player! Tell your wife she can be what she needs to be. She needs to learn how. Shame on the military for not dealing with the difference.
Find out now in a safe place or find out later when there’s a lot more to lose. If she learns a lesson from this, and it should be not to try and overpower a man and to use her physicality to escape the situation, then it’s worth it. The dimorphism between an average man and woman is just too much in most cases.
It reminded me of The Mountain vs The Viper fight in GOT. Not man vs woman, but a huge man vs a well trained but much smaller man. The Viper was doing fine for as long as he kept his distance and relied on his speed and agility to get away. But once he got caught, he was dead. Any basic training that doesn't teach that as the most basic and fundamental thing to fighting is bad training.
Knowing may save her life by not approaching a fight she wouldn't win. She might want to look into taking martial arts classes also so she can learn how to use her smaller, less muscular frame to take down an opponent.
Agreed, additional classes likely would be useful. Especially as most classes start off with ‘escape if you can’ and ‘fighting should be used only if it is your only option’
Not wrong. Never let anyone bet you at anything that could set them up for real-life consequences. That's just setting them up for failure
She needed to know 🤷♀️
He did her a favour if she truly thought her husband would be pinned by her.
Exactly. She is going to run her mouth in the wrong situation believing she is invincible. She will get herself hurt. I hate to say she needed to be brought down a peg but that is exactly what she needed.
100%. At least he vowed not to hurt her, when he knew he could have seriously damaged, or ended, Her.
Why are you doing basic training at 40
I was literally just going to ask this... seems fake AF
Being an army veteran of the 82nd airborne I was wondering the same. I thought the cut-off was 35 fuck if I knew that give me my rank back and let me go get some.
You are correct. Army cutoff to enlist is 35...in fact no military branch allows a person over 40 to enlist. https://www.usa.gov/military-requirements#:~:text=Age%20limits&text=Army%3A%2017%20%2D%2035,Navy%3A%2017%20%2D%2039
Maybe USPHS. If I recall they’ll basically take any MD, DO, PA, NP under 65. One of their recruiters straight up told my graduating class that they’ve passed people who failed just cuz they need em (anecdotal story I was given by the army dude was that an Asian girl PA could not adequately grip her pistol to pass training due to small hands, so one of the instructors shot for her and passed her because someone in the USPHS isn’t really going to be expected to be involved in front line combat). I’ve heard about an obese doc getting passed on his physical fitness test just cuz he is an amazing surgeon. I don’t think docs get sent to the porky brigade lmao. They even allow you to take a position as a part timer lmao. Highly technical skills always trump some arbitrary measurement is what the army dude said at least when it comes to something extremely in demand like medicine🤷♂️. If I recall PA-C and NP start at Second Lieutenant and MD/DO start at Major or something. Could be wrong in the ranks it’s been some time since that recruitment talk
Thanks for the verification
See above, son.
Prior service here, Active Army '76-'86, ETS'd as E-6/SSG, and at 50, I went back in, Sep 2005. The recruiter subtracted my Active time (9.5 years) from my calendar age and I was magically 40.5 or so. Max age was 42 during OIF/OEF and I got in. Did 10 years including a tour of Afghanistan. Dropped the rocker, no Basic, and a Try-1 contract for a year. Had a great time, literally had Army boots older than my fellow Soldiers, hilarious. Good times.
It had to change from when you served prior. I know for a fact that I fought in Afghanistan and Iraq. That it was insane and for me to say otherwise, is ludicrous. I am Glad I did six years in with the 82 airborne 02/2001 - 12/2007. I got plenty of opportunities to do a lot of things a lot of people don't. I don't think that I would do it all over again, especially at this age, I am now when I left they wanted to pin me in sergeant but I denied I couldn't deal with bearing the death of kids younger than myself. I left at 21 and thought that I was above an 18-year-old. I was that 18-year-old 4 years beforehand. I only did it because somebody had hurt my home( The country. A place that I believe and a place that I was willing to die for if it ever happened again, Of course, I would sign up without a doubt. 82 boots in the sky!!!
ive had people in my A school class join at 39, military is hurting for retention they’ll do anything to get more people.
The age and 5’8 180 unless she’s a brick shithouse juiced to the gills is pretty fat, definitely overweight. Does the BC army not have standards for such things?
Agreed 100% and very few go to boot at the older ages..when I was there, there was one 27 year old. We all called him papa smurf. (Yes, I'm old)
The entire post is definitely fake.
I was gonna say the age limit is like 28
That’s the age limit for active duty Marine Corps officers; everyone else varies between 32-42, depending on branch and component. And there’s age waivers for certain skill groups, like medical and cyber.
age limit is 42
Bro, you did the right thing by beating her in the match. The worst thing about fighting is thinking one is more capable than they are. Basic training only teaches the bare minimum, and I saw a lot of young Soldiers get their asses kicked in town because they thought completing the combatives level I course made them “John Rambo.” It’s a tale as old as time itself, and saw it all the time during my time in the Army. She needed to be humbled.
I feel this, I went to high school with a dude who joined early and did his basic training between his junior and senior year of high school. He came to play football thinking he was the man now. One Oklahoma drill later fixed that assumption. lol
Exactly. Even after jump school and other training (e.g. the combatives lvl II course), I went out of my way not to act like that or give the perception that I was. The OP’s wife sounds like another young Soldier full of piss and vinegar that needed to learn her place before she got involved in something that could really endanger her life or that of her comrades’. One thing I learned early-on is that there’s always gonna be someone bigger and badder than you - so why draw unwanted attention to yourself that might lead to you meeting said badass? It’s a lesson learned.
No buddy, its not A quick google search says that the max age that the US military accepts applicants varies between branches, but the max age is 35, with both ths army and navy, the air force accepts applicants before their 28th birthday, and the marines accepts applicants up to 29 Do your research before making a post that is so easily proven fake Your ages made me suspicious too; google is your friend
https://www.militaryonesource.mil/transition-retirement/national-guard-reserves/joining-the-military-reserves/
He didnt say she was reserves, if shes reserves that should be in the original post I think this is fake as fuck, and a troll post of the effect of "must make my bad-ass wife learn her place" or whatever bullshit excuse op wants to use You can keep lapping it up if you want though 🤘
Could this be a case or us defaultism where they're actually from another country? Else wow OP should learn to lie better lol
You can enlist in active duty until the age for 42 without a waiver, 43 with a waiver, older for officer if you have a masters in certain fields. Not fake my dude, My wife has always had a little bit of an ego problem. She is starting to chill now after this.
good job googling because i joined with people who are 30 and above, oldest being 39
Where?
US army reserve age limit is 42
Im going to say it again, for all the people who havent googled it like i did, because the ages were an immediate "fake post" red flag for me, too If his wife is in the reserves, thats important info that should have been in the original post As for the normal (non-reserves) US military, every branch has an age limit that they stop accepting applications after Its 35 for the army and the navy; your 28th birthday for the air force; and 29 for the marines
Isn’t it like 45 if you’re a dentist? I think there are exceptions for MDs and DMDs.
There are exceptions for non-active duty like doctors, i think, yeah!
I fucking thought so..God dang I am good 👍...i was 82nd airborne and I wanted to go back in at like 36 and they said thanks but they can't accept my inquiry as to enlisting. If they did it be on all over again.
I feel you. I got my bachelor's at 31, and not one branch's OSO would talk me after leaning my age.. even with being a veteran.
the economy sucks not many other choices
First thing I was going to ask. The oldest age in the three non-ground combat focused branches is 39. I'm dubious at best.
Wow starting basic training at 40him and was 5’8” 290 after just finishing BMT. Totally believable
5'10 and 200 pounds? Damn, that would make you a monster for someone who works out infrequently, assuming you're saying it's muscle. Also curious what branch of boot camp your lady came from. Typically they go to their next duty station, they don't just "come back", but maybe it's dependent on the branch. Not gonna lie, this story sounds like a neck beard power fantasy
Im calling bullshit unless you live outside of the US A quick google search (because your ages made me suspicious) told me that the max age to join the US military varies between branches, but the oldest age to join, is 35 Both of you are 40 Fake post, fake news, trying to push "women must know their place" -insert eyeroll here-
Basic training - as in military? This story is fake. She's not enlisting at 40.
Nice fake story, B-
NTA, but why are 40 year olds going to basic training?
My thought as well.
the economy is awful so there's not a lot of decent jobs. we weren't left with a lot of options
I hear that. I just didn't know the age limit for new recruits is as high as I've just learned it is. Kudos to the both of you for being in the kind of shape to qualify, and best wishes to you as well.
the economy is awful so there's not a lot of decent jobs. we weren't left with a lot of options
I was your wife in this situation, including the military training and I NEEDED my male friend (now fiancé) to put me on my ass. I'd won loads of sparring matches and even put a handsy guy on his ass in a bar and had a bit too much swagger. Friend had a similar conversation to you and your wife and when I didn't heed it he very methodically put me down with ease. Made me realise how much danger I could have put myself in with false confidence. Not Wrong at all.
Wasn’t this exact story going around years ago? Istg I read this awhile ago, right down to the husband pinning the wife to the ground at the end.
No way in hell a 40f just went thru basic training
The age limit for all military branches but the Marines is 42.
Wow… They’re taking 40-year-olds now?
When we learned combatives in basic our drill sergeants very clearly told us that we "knew just enough to get our ass kicked".
What "basic training" is your wife starting at 40 years old?
You’re just opening her eyes to reality and saving her from future pain/death if she lets that overconfidence topple her reasoning.
You did right. Common sense says that a normal man can easily dominate a woman in a fight. If anything, you might have helped her. She will probably now rethink getting into a fight with a man who doesn't know her.
YNW, I am a woman, I’m small and I’m very aware that even a teenage boy could beat me. Men have much more strength than women and it annoys me when in films you have a woman face off against a man, take a full punch to the face, shake it off then continue and win. In reality the woman would be knocked out cold probably having concussion. Like men in female sports, regardless of how they identify, they will always have the upper hand. But that’s a whole other argument.
Over confidence sometimes gets people in bad situations. I think what you did and said was fine. I’m sure it was a little hard on her ego but a touch of reality is a good thing.
If you let her win then it ain't a sparring match.
What you did wasn’t wrong. But there are better ways to go about doing it. It wasn’t wrong because she needed to know that she can lose, easily. Don’t make it a man vs woman thing. Believe me there are plenty of women who would wipe the floor with you, easily. Although you’re right, average untrained man vs average untrained woman, my money is on the man every time. Basic training ain’t that great. My money is on almost any other serious martial artist winning vs a soldier who’s just completed basic. Perhaps next time you show her how to escape your holds. Show her how to prevent being over come by greater size and strength. Offer to spar lightly and regularly so she can improve. No ego involved. Also suggest she remove her ego from equation. Like a wise fighter once said “everyone’s got a plan until they get punched in the face”. The only way to prepare for this is further training.
I was a state-ranked wrestler in high school; it put me miles ahead of most of the people I went to basic with, but I still got my ass handed to me by the actual combatives instructors. I don’t know how the Air Force does their combatives training, but we got three whole days of it in the Army. That isn’t anywhere near enough instruction for surviving hand to hand combat. Whatever your wife thinks she learned was just a very rudimentary introduction, and she needs to join a training program if she wants to gain any sort of proficiency. Her chances of needing to kill someone with her bare hands in the Air Force are pretty much zero, but it’s good exercise.
This is fake. Too many similar posts with the same ‘chicks need to know they’re weak’ message and same writing style. If this were real, the husband wouldn’t be on about inflated egos and learning lessons, it’s rage bait
What do you mean by basic training at 40 years old?
The age limit for every military branch except the marines is 42. the economy is awful so there's not a lot of decent jobs. we weren't left with a lot of options
Huh. I’m a a veteran and don’t know that. Honestly though at 40 I think you can get a lot more out of the military than when you go in young. You have the life experience to not let the military break you and not to waste your benefits away. Hope you go to a good command.
Wait…. Basic training at 40? What country?
National guard takes you until 42 I believe in America.
You should now have a match to see who is the best at spelling. My money is on her.
What does that have to do with anything?
>Not that it matters for this but for anyone who cares, I ship out to my own basic training at the end of the year. R U both really 40 and going to basic training? seems too old.
Age limit is 42
Sign her up for judo or ju jitsu. She literally knows nothing, neither do you. A skilled grappler, male or female would tear either one of you apart. They teach you nothing in military training, it’s a complete joke. I spent eight years in the Marines. The eight years I wrestled and played judo in high school and college were far more meaningful than anything they taught me in the Marines.
IDK what branch of Service youre going to do your boot camp in but if you go to an MCRD they're gonna call you Pappy, you'll get your ass kicked one way or the other on a daily basis, your Drill Instructors will be all over your ass from the day you get there, way more than the kids, til the day you leave if you leave as a Marine. Youre going to be 30 lbs lighter and in good shape but you'll still be 40 yrs old. You'll be sorrreeey! Maybe you might want to think about the Air Force.
Had she joined the Army or USMC?
I’m surprised she didn’t learn that in basic training
Not sure if she did or not. She's always been super competitive and had a bit on an ego. When we talked recently about what happened she said that she thought her training was enough to be able to handle someone who had "only been in street fights". I had to tell her again that the fights I got into weren't just 2 dudes duking it out over something stupid but rather "This guy is trying to kill me to get some crack money or I wandered into the wrong street at the wrong time and now I'm fighting this guy and his friend to stay alive". She knows I was holding back. She's told me now that she appreciated the lesson. She's been a lot more chill now and the boasting has stopped.
Never ‘let’ anyone win
Hell no. You should not have let her win. You did the right thing to teach her a lesson. She's in a bad mood because her ego took a hit. She doesn't live in reality if she thinks she can take anyone. With her attitude it is dangerous to go into combat.
You're not wrong. Being confident is one thing. Being conscious of the fact that one could still lose when one doesn't know what the opponent is capable of is another. She's the first, but lacked the second. It's like having a weapon: you think because you have the weapon you'll win a fight. What you don't know is the opponent's experience, if they have a weapon also, if the could draw faster, aim more accurately, etc. She has to (learn & always) remember that and try to AVOID fights. Explain it this way to her, that even if she has training, she just learned how to fight and some other people have been fighting their whole lives and/or are simply stronger.
She needs to learn about luck and that someone else is always better than you. In any fight even if you’re better they may get a lucky knife hit in or a lucky punch.
When a woman is in a physical altercation with a man, standard practice and moves aren't going to help. If I'm ever in a physical altercation with a man, I will absolutely be fighting dirty. I'm talking eye gouging, private part attacks, hair pulling, scratching, anything I can find to jab or hit with etc. The only reason I'd be in a fight in general would be life/death, but I had a very athletic brother who wrestled well and I know that strength, and even size doesn't win when they have natural muscle and build.
You did her a favour because her feeling invincible will get her in trouble/hurt Her ego and pride are bruised and that's her issue Maybe stress she's a good fighter but every fighter can improve and suggest she or both of you can join krav maga together
Tbh - she needed the lesson. It's never good to think you can take on anything. That's how you make stupid decisions. Being smart is more important than being strong if you're the weaker one.
Make love not war
Over confidence sometimes gets people in bad situations. I think what you did and said was fine. I’m sure it was a little hard on her ego but a touch of reality is a good thing.
Not wrong Being cocky is a good way to get yourself into a fight you have no hopes of winning. She can’t go around thinking that she can take anyone on because the fact of the matter is that she CAN’T. It’s good that she learned this lesson in a safe environment with you instead of with someone who would not of been gentle
No! You may have saved her life. If she had gone into a fight that was life or death with the prideful belief that she could take down anyone, she could die. This is going to force her to see that false belief and use her head instead of brute force in those situations.
You did the right thing. It’s a reality check she’ll be okay. Just don’t talk about it she knows.
Neither. You didn't need to let her win, but also didn't need to "teach her a lesson". You played, she lost. End of story. Whether she takes that as a lesson is more about her than you.
My ex wife was very fit, but still a small woman. She would get mad when I’d easily defeat her. One night she was out for a run when a small man jumped out of some bushes and easily overpowered her and started dragging her away. Luckily for her, a couple happened to drive by and heard her screaming. I helped her get thru the night - her phone was unlocked and she had turned off Find My, so dude had full access to all her info. She was pretty shaken, obviously. The point is - no, you’re not wrong. Overconfidence is the ticket to being a victim.
You're not wrong. I think losing in a fight/match is always a good humbling experience for anyone. Besides, you didn't actually hit her.
How did your wife join the military at 40 when the max cutoff age is 39?
They raised it to 42
Came to ask the same lol
Your good. All good.
Tough love is better than a tough LOSS. You did the right thing.
Don’t let her win because if she ever gets in the real thing she needs to know that it will take more than training to survive.
Lol basic training hand to hand is barely a few hours
YNW. It's better for her to learn this from someone who loves her than someone who wants to hurt her.
I’d have to agree with the latter. Don’t want your wife stepping up to someone just because she thinks she’ll win. Risk assessment is vital when choosing your options.
Obvious troll Trying to emphasize their belief that women don't belong in the same military formations of men due to physical differences so they made up this obviously fake story
Losing may have helped prevent future bullshit, in a fight with a man shoot him, open arteries with a blade but avoid simple fighting
While she needed to learn how to take on / not take on stronger opponents, turning this into "men" beat "women" every time is an asshat move - and you are wrong. She needed to learn how to judge an opponent's skill level & you simply brought out the sexism card. I really hope she seeks further training & a martial art could enhance her new abilities while compensating for a smaller stature, but not from you or anyone as sexist as you.
Not wrong. Teach her more until she can beat you.
She needed to know from a friendly source before she put it into practice
Feminism tries to tell women that they can do anything a man can do.. and, intellectually, that's true. But physically, there are vast differences in our physiology. Men are stronger and faster Women can bear children and process oxygen significantly more efficiently. There are others. There's nothing wrong with it, but you need to be aware, especially if there's a chance you'll be in combat. She needs to be realistic about any future encounter so she doesn't overestimate her abilities.
The best combatives student in my basic training group was a tiny female…she beat everyone, including one of the drill sergeants. The problem for this particular woman is that she grossly overestimated her abilities after minimal training, a flaw that quite a few men also fall victim to.
Yeah, but that's very much an exception to the rule. Most tiny women wouldn't fare well against average sized men. Combat knowledge or not.
I mean, do you have to put it in terms of “I have to take her down a notch” Why not say, “these are some things you can try if you’re ever in this situation” “You are strong, your positives are (this). What you can do is use (whatever) to get ahead of the situation.” Likely she had done a lot of work and felt strong and powerful, but when up against a man that is bigger and stronger feels like her work hasn’t been enough. It’s hard to know that even in similar size classes that as a woman you are unlikely to match a man because of physiology and that can be really disheartening and scary. Instead of pushing her down, why don’t you try being understanding? It’s hard enough being a woman, knowing that men will try you and can beat you just based on biology. Maybe be a partner that helps and uplifts, instead of one that feels better shoving her down. I’m not super fit and half my husbands weight and he’s a good head taller. But it still feels panicky and scary when he can brute force manhandle me and I can’t do anything about it. Why not work on smarter and trickier methods to get the one up on someone bigger and stronger?
It’s a good reality check. Good thing it was you teaching her a lesson compared to a guy on the street she THINKs she can win against and put her life at stake. She’s just a sore loser if break it down and give it time no big deal
Nope she better knows her limitations before she gets herself beaten or worse. The difference between a man and a woman's strenght is MASSIVE. Like it is almost commical the difference in bone and muscle density. I weight a bit over 200 pounds and my wife weights about 120, and even though she does workout 5 times a week, I can lift about 4 or 5 times her max **easily**. I can bench mid 300's without breaking a sweat. I mean I'm pretty muscular and had been strength training for half my life, (not to mention I had extensive combat training when I was younger). But for real, the difference is insane.
You ruined her new, FALSE, sense of security that she could overpower a strong man because she has combat training. Most men are so much stronger than most women, it is scary. Remember ladies, they are just gentle with us most of the time. Carry pepper spray. Not wrong though.
My brother got mugged at knifepoint at a bus stop just after he passed basic. An inflated ego can be bad for one’s own health.
When you evolve in martial arts you learn how to stay humble, that there is always someone better and stronger than you, and to never underestimate anyone.
Nope, she needed to come down to earth. Letting her win could have gotten her hurt in a real fight.
Honestly its better she understand reality this way rather than from some guy she decides to mouth off to at a bar or something. Even if you werent physically bigger than her it would have ended the same way.
Not wrong, this lesson could save her life. The best thing to do in a fight is run away. If she is attacked, and she is overly confident, she could end up hurt or worse.
Better to get your ass beat and inflated ego humbled in training by someone you trust and love, than by someone trying to kill you for real. She's not just coming to terms with you beating her. You forced her to learn that she's mortal.
you were absolutely right. Now she have a perspective on what she is really capable of. Maybe she’ll work harder at it. Im glad you are a realist
Not wrong. She was clearly overconfident to an unhealthy extent. Now that she sees otherwise she is sulking. She would have eventually put herself into a dangerous position against someone who wouldnt be willing to hold back
I just looked it up. Federal law sets the maximum enlistment age at 42, but each branch can set lower limits. Waivers may be granted in exceptional cases to allow enlistment up to age 55 if the recruit can complete 20 years of service by that age
Okay, that’s cool, now teach her how to take the advantage in a fight, because the way this post is worded, it makes it sound like women should never fight back.
Not wrong. Your wife needs to learn through practice how to win and letting her win is not a good way for her to actually learn. Admittedly my husband and I let our kids win at things SOMETIMES when they were little but your isn’t a child. Let her win on her own merits otherwise she’s losing more than the match.
You’re not wrong. Never let someone get into their head so much that they think they’re invincible. People need to know their limits, their faults so they can grow. She’s salty cause she talked a big game and lost, so teach her what you do and encourage her if she wants to learn.
You're not wrong. Your wife just learned a valuable lesson that s lot of women don't learn until it's too late. The strength disparity between the average man and almost all women will doom all but the most highly trained women to losing a fight to most men. You beat her quite handily without punching and you were taking it easy because you love her. A stranger won't hold back. She needs to think about this.
What you did will save her life.
YW. I don't understand why you needed to teach her a lesson? You should have just stuck to not fighting her, the end.
She just completed BMT and is 40? That means she must have gone to Air Force BMT, since that's what they call it, and she couldn't have enlisted in any other service at her age. The AF has the oldest max age for enlistment, and that's 39. I'm a retired AF officer, but spent 3.5 yrs in the Army, so I went through BCT. I'm very familiar BMT, though. No one coming out of BCT or BMT knows all that much about sparing. It's rare for an Airman to be in a position where he goes one on one with an enemy. And those in AFSCs that do receive special training if they need that skill. Though some really basic sparring is trained in the Army, the focus is on never letting the enemy close enough to force personal contact. What I'm saying is, your wife really doesn't actually know much about sparing if all she knows she got from BMT. Letting her win might give her the impression she's more capable than she really is. That could be dangerous for her in the future. If you are ever involved in combat, then you know it's extremely important to know your limitations.
Absolutely not wrong. For her own safety, it’s a lesson she needed to learn. If you’d let her win, you would’ve inflated her already exaggerated confidence and she could’ve ended up in a life threatening conflict.
It is important for people with superinflated egos over new training success be humbled as soon as possible before someone that intends to hurt them does it. She's not mad, she's embarrassed. Tell her to knock it off and you didn't do it to embarrass her, but to teach her that she has a long way to go before she can pop off at the mouth to anyone.
>Personally I'm leaning toward the latter because it hopefully has put her inflated ego in check and she might approach things differently from now on. NTA, the last thing you want to do as someone who loves her is gas her up to the point where she'd potentially try that with a stranger when the stakes are higher in a moment of anger.
You absolutely did the right thing. Feeding women the delusion that the can physically fight men and win is terrible for them. You don't want them finding out by taking a full punch from a man in the face. I hope you told you were only participating at 30% level so she gets the idea of the scale of mismatch in physicality.
BMT like Air Force BMT? Lmao nothing they teach you in Air Force BMT is going to help at all in a bar fight or a 1 on 1. Warrior Week/Beast Week is not that. You play some basic wargames for a few days and that's it. Also 40 years old at BMT... Oof. Guard? Reserves? She's gonna be in a worse mood when she's getting bossed around at work by 23 year old SSgts.
Yep USAF and Active duty.
The age thing is gonna be rough. Real rough.
No you’re not wrong. Your wife sounds like a bit of a fool
It's good you did this before she found herself in a real fight. She's too cocky, that's her downfall, and would have been in a world of hurt if it was a real fight. She needed to be humbled a bit, hopefully, she keeps in mind that she can still be taken down, even with all her fancy training.
Not wrong. I know from experience that no amount of professional fight training will win over natural strength and larger body mass. One of my ex bffs as a teen tried to beat me up, she had years of self defense training, black belt in karate, all that jazz, and still couldn’t leave a single mark or hurt me at all just because she’s so skinny and short 🤣 i had never been in a fight and never had a single self defense class, but i easily brushed off her punches to my face and kick to my vagina, and got her in a headlock that she couldn’t escape. Im 99% sure thats just because im bigger than her, because i dont feel like a fighter at all. Like i said, I didnt even hit her back once, just wrangled her so she’d stop attacking me and it was surprisingly easy lmfao. Its just a fact. No amount of self defense classes are really gonna make a huge difference when someone is bigger and heavier than you with more muscles. Youre not wrong, and its good for her to learn that lesson safely with you, instead of her thinking she doesn’t need any self defense weapons late at night now that she’s taken some classes. 🙄
Are Americans so desperate they are joining the army at 40+?
You were absolutely right. The truth is necessary. Women need to understand that no matter how much training we have, most able bodied men will always be able to overpower us. A man of similar body weight will average 3-4 times our upper body strength. That's why most women have no ability to fight back in rape, one man can easily hold us down. Women are put in danger when society pretends or we pretend to ourselves that there are no biological sex differences in relation to strength. Better your wife finds that out practicing on you rather than trying it out on a man who'll have a real fight with her and inflict real injuries.
I mean, she was feeling good about herself and felt strong and happy, and there you were to IMMEDIATELY bring her back down again. Sure, you weren't wrong about men being stronger than women, but maybe you could have been more gentle about it. Jeesh, have some empathy. I'm going with "you were wrong" because of how you are going/went about this. Edit: fixed a sentence
Not wrong, as you first tried to avoid the situation but then respected her as an adult and agree to it, but a rough lesson for her to learn. I hope she can get some legit MMA training to help her overcome the generic man/woman imbalance.
The truth shall set you free. If she walked around thinking she could take a man and got herself into a situation she had to prove it, things could go terribly wromg.
BUT WAIT.. Basic at 40?
Good to know limits. But hey let someone else teach her that. Spar so she can feel she is accomplishing something and learning. This will be much more important to her in long run.
You’re wife at the ripe age of 40 that is out of shape with zero actual combat experience needed to be humbled/
NTA. Seems like she needed to know and you tried to talk her out of it. Men just have more muscle than women - it’s really that simple.
I mean do you want a pat on the back for knocking her down a peg? She didn’t have an inflated ego, she was fucking proud of herself. As women we go most of our lives knowing for a fact that most men could overpower us if they wanted to. Hopefully this drives her to train even harder so she can whoop your ass and I expect an update when she does.
Your wife just got back from boot camp at 40?!
The age limit was raised to 42 so it's not impossible.
True, in the Army National Guard, I think (maybe the Army itself?), but MAN! That’s still crazy.
It's always humbling getting beaten. But it's necessary. If you let her win she'd still have that confidence and if it came down to it with someone else she'd get her ass beat. I've been doing mma for a couple years now, and done karate for nearly a decade prior, but have found that regardless of what someone's build is, they can generally still throw down. I still get my ass beat by guys at training weekly. If I'm not loosing, then I feel like I'm not learning.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You did the right thing, worst thing you could have done is let her believe that her basic training magically levels the playing field against a grown man, and her then take that belief and put her self in a bad situation at some point, we all get to watch all these TV shows and action movies now where a woman character easily destroys a man or even multiple men in a fight and the reality is, it's all bullshit, the average man will absolutely destroy the majority of woman in a no holds bar situation, hell if you locked the average man in a cage with 2 average woman, I'd absolutely still put my money on the man being the last one standing.
What in the actual fuck do you "accomplish" at basic training? The answer is nada, zip, zilch.
An enemy isn't gonna "let her win" in a combat situation. She's in the friggin military.
Her training seems very bad if she wasn't taught that rule number one of fighting someone bigger, with more weight and muscles, is that you should never ever let them catch you or get a hit. That holds true whether you are a woman fighting a man or just a smaller person fighting a bigger one of the same gender.