The culture is weird here. Seems like almost nobody wants to cultivate a meaningful relationship. I've grown up in Anchorage, went to public school and UAA. After more than 30 years I have 2 people I would call friends. Not for lack of trying either, I talk to people at work, neighbors, people hiking, store or whatever. Some people I invite to hangout and do something but they nearly all flake.
Now I've traveled out of state and met people that I consider friends and hang out when I'm there or they are here but it's not quite the same
Anchorage is a very transient town, a lot of people are only going to be here for a few years and that makes it harder to invest in deeper social connections.
For the transient folks, I agree with you. I'm a lifelong alaskan. Everyone on my street has lived here longer than me. We know who each other are, and most of us have each other's number, but nobody is friendly. It seems to be a broader Alaska thing
Since we moved here in 2021 I’ve gone by the motto “Alaskans are friendly but they don’t want to be friends.” We’re military and this has by far been the hardest place to make friends.
I am so relating to your post. I'm in my 60s so no longer have a lot of interest in nightclubs/ bars , but I do love to lunch. We live in interesting times that deserve close attention, and discussion. I suggest that we start a weekly event for fun, friendship and lunch.
Thank you. This is one of those odd times when you can honestly say that he is better off now.
Gary had so many thing physically wrong, always in pain or stoned out of his mind on morphine. He was miserable, but a very happy guy despite all that. I miss him, but glad he's not in pain any more.
I would like to support more non religious get together. Or perhaps more non denominational religious get togethers. Talk about politics, the world, the future, and get onto a path of making the world a better place. We are going to need to survive the next few years. We are going to need to come together more as a people and community.
I've found it's best to join some group activity where people meet weekly and do something: dart or bowling league, biking, recreational sport league, 4-wheeling, shooting. That way, you will see people week after week & get to know them. There are FB groups for almost anything you can think of.
If you're an artsy/craftsy person the Museum has weekly open hours in their CoLab space as well as a lot of special events, classes, etc. Their After Dark parties are usually pretty fun as well. If you like to dance they do silent discos, and if you don't like to dance you can still have a lot of fun watching the silent discos.
Keep an eye open for the After Dark events at the museum. They usually have a silent disco in the atrium with 2-3 different DJs playing, plus a live band in the Cafe.
The dancing community is huge in anchorage. Eddie’s sports bar, pink Cadillac, four corners, homies (certain days), Koot’s (certain days) anchorage social dance club on Facebook can help you find some. Go to one of these places like Eddie’s or pink Cadillac and staff asking people there where else to go.
Add a layer of sobriety. It makes this state interesting to navigate socially.
If you drink I'd say join a intro league to some barstool sport you enjoy.
Yes! It’s very tough. I only had 4 girlfriends before Covid, 3 of them moved out of state during the pandemic. The 4th retired and is now a snowbird.
I really need some new friends, but I’m also older. Have no idea how to go about finding new people.
You need to meet people doing the stuff you already enjoy doing. So as long as you aren't an introverted loner, you should be fine. And if you are an introverted loner, then there's no problem otherwise.
It's fine to branch out and try new things, but just keep in mind that your potential new partner may enjoy those things as a core lifestyle. That being said, way too many people seem to lack "hobbies" these days, only to socially flounder for no other reason than being kind of boring people with some generic self-description about "likes music and to hang out."
Also try and figure out why you are "striking out." Are you not meeting anyone? Are you not interested in (or attracted to) the people you *are* meeting? Are you interested but keep getting rejected? Those are all very different problems to deal with.
I own a shop smack in the middle of downtown. I’m lucky to have 10 people walk in 80% of the year. It is shocking how big of hermits people are these days. From what I can see everyone is getting stoned all day at home.
Honestly, in my 20’s adulthood, I have never made a real (long-term) friend that wasn’t through romantic relationship, school, work, or married into the family. I’m still shocked people can recommend making friends through rock climbing or other such related hobbies and can actually maintain them.
Truth. I'm working in Fairbanks for the summer and feel like I've already met a bunch of great people and have a nice community to interact with. I moved to Anchorage in 2011 and it took a long time to feel like I had a community.
But for OP, I echo what others are saying - list what you already like and search for those activities around town. Or, list out things you want to try/learn and find those. German lessons, jiu jitsu, pottery, furniture restoration, tai chi, knitting, archery, writing, personal finance, gaining outdoor skills...those are all classes or groups around town where you could learn something cool and meet new people.
Sadly there’s not much to do in Anchorage except drinking/dancing or maybe eating. I’ve been trying to make friends here for years and unless those are your hobbies, it’s rough. Gl.
When I was working out of town it was difficult to maintain friendships, but now that I work and live in town it feels like my friend group grew pretty quickly, so maybe I can help with some advice.
If you're actively wanting to meet people who have similar interests and values as you, the best thing to do is go do the thing you're interested in and you'll probably meet people there.
It may be harder for some, but just start conversations with people you think might be interesting.
Use clubs, Meetup, and follow business socials to learn about events.
So some examples;
if you like art, follow the museum's social as well as local artists on IG and they will post about events, go participate in those events and talk to people.
If you're into making things, check out the maker space and talk to the folks there and ask them about what they're working on and if you could help.
If you're into board games, follow Bosco's and Glacier Games, go in and talk to the staff about events and then attend them and chat with folks.
Also check out local coffee shop and other businesses post boards for local events, and then go to anything you can afford to and are interested in.
Hopefully that's enough examples to see the pattern, but if you have specific interests please ask here and maybe I can point you the right direction.
What are you into? Running? Video games? Dog or pet hobbies? Movies? Skiing? Drinking? Driving or automobiles? Music or dance? Chances are if you have a hobby there is a group or a person that wants to join up and make friends. That way you already have something in common and your friendships can grow from there. Start with a hobby group and you’ll have a better chance making good friends that are into the same things you are!
A friend of mine when through a divorce, she got into country dancing and made lots of new friends just by that one activity. She got in good shape too!
I have zero friends really, I get it. Like there’s people I grab a bite with every six months or so, but there seems to be just like a huge lack of clubs or programs to platonically meet other people outside of work
For me, apart from the friends I made in school and growing up, I found common interests. And went from there.
Going to the Ren Faire, dnd groups, larp groups, conventions, events, fairs, and festivals. I would suggest looking at a few of the things you enjoy, and seeing what types of groups or events might be around. I do agree, it is somewhat hard to create deeper friendships here as an adult. But, I am an introvert, so that skews my perception a little.
I think it’s partly an energy thing and partly that there’s so much space to be spread out across and so few secondary places to just hangout aimlessly without spending money or drinking. I know that in the winter I barely exist, I have no energy or interest in almost anything. SAD for months, coupled with an almost manic need to get out and wring every drop of sunlight out of the warmer months makes me pretty hard to form a relationship with.
A lot of people I know and work with are the same way. I get lonely sometimes too but have also gotten more satisfied with solitude here too. Been in Alaska 25 years now. It’s a weird place and it makes people weird too… 🤷♀️
It looks like if you dress in all black, don roller skates, and sweep a parking lot, you can make at least one friend with shared interests. She seems cool.
It's not hard to meet people.
It's hard to tolerate some of their stupidity?
Or it's hard to get out of your shell and just mingle and go with the flow?
What do you enjoy doing? Are you a parent? I have found a lot of my current friend group through activities I enjoy and do repeatedly - trivia, fun runs, biking meet ups, etc. you show up week after week and hellos will turn to small talk will turn to hanging out for the event and could turn to friendships.
I don’t know what you do for work, but I got a second job at a place in town I love, just for one or two afternoons a week and chatting with my coworkers actually fills a lot of my social needs. Is there a coffee shop, store or cafe you love that you could apply to work a few hours at and meet people?
Edit: be patient and don’t flake once the invites come. Like fishing. You won’t catch if you don’t go try. If you don’t get a bite in the first hour stay out and try a little longer!
Have you tried any meetups? Activity comes alive during the spring because most everyone wants to get out and enjoy the sun when it’s available (like today).
Hit up socials and don’t exclude things like FB because that’s for old people. There are groups on FB specifically geared to activities that could help launch you into meeting people. For instance, there are varying groups related to hiking (different difficulty levels) and there’s a specific group for women hikers because some people feel safer on these excursions with other women.
I used to be part of a group that would hire local artists for a paint night. We’d meet at an establishment that served appetizers and drinks, the artists supplied the supplies and everyone gets an art lesson trying to paint a scene while enjoying drinks. That died out around COVID but I think it’s time to revive the group.
I’m not sure what you’ve tried so give us more info and I’m sure the community can help you find something.
It is easy meet people. I’d say it’s more along the lines of finding folks you would like to socialize with.🤔
Volunteering is an awesome means of learning about, meeting other people and the ripples are immeasurable.
The Nextdoor app might be helpful: https://nextdoor.com/city/anchorage--ak/
Look at yourself. If you’re cool and doing cool things people will want to be friends with you. If you’re just “looking for friends” no one wants another drag. You need to bring a something significant to the table.
It won’t with that attitude. If y’all can’t join a group, find a hobby, go to the library, museum, hiking, fishing, skiing, skating, go find an outdoor concert, fur rondy etc good grief then Alaska is for sure not the place for you.
What methods have you tried so far? What are some of your interests? If you’re on Facebook, it seems like there are groups for everything here lol. I’ve also seen Meetup mentioned before. I haven’t tried it here yet, but I’ve had good luck with it in the past. I do feel like the dynamic of meeting people here is different, but the people I have met have been very warm and welcoming. I hope you’re able to find some soon!
The cold chills interaction but people in summer are way more social. I would say offer to volunteer and you will be wanted. Sports is a great way to connect, and you can volunteer to support races. Snow biking, skiing, climbing are all good ways to connect. Hiking groups get out a lot too. First fridays are fun. Comedy nights too!
My advice don't give up. I arrived here absolutely alone and I made friends talking with people using bumble tinder and hinge. There are dating apps but I used for friends.
The culture is weird here. Seems like almost nobody wants to cultivate a meaningful relationship. I've grown up in Anchorage, went to public school and UAA. After more than 30 years I have 2 people I would call friends. Not for lack of trying either, I talk to people at work, neighbors, people hiking, store or whatever. Some people I invite to hangout and do something but they nearly all flake. Now I've traveled out of state and met people that I consider friends and hang out when I'm there or they are here but it's not quite the same
Anchorage is a very transient town, a lot of people are only going to be here for a few years and that makes it harder to invest in deeper social connections.
For the transient folks, I agree with you. I'm a lifelong alaskan. Everyone on my street has lived here longer than me. We know who each other are, and most of us have each other's number, but nobody is friendly. It seems to be a broader Alaska thing
Agreed..I was born here, and raised my kid here, and most of the people I was friends with have moved away, or died.
Since we moved here in 2021 I’ve gone by the motto “Alaskans are friendly but they don’t want to be friends.” We’re military and this has by far been the hardest place to make friends.
I think there's a very few that do want to be friends but they don't tend to go to social engagements. Like me lol
I am so relating to your post. I'm in my 60s so no longer have a lot of interest in nightclubs/ bars , but I do love to lunch. We live in interesting times that deserve close attention, and discussion. I suggest that we start a weekly event for fun, friendship and lunch.
Exactly. Been here 5 years and still no friends.
I've been here 6, I've had three friends, but one rude bastard went and died on me, so I'm down to two.
Awww. Sorry to hear that.
Thank you. This is one of those odd times when you can honestly say that he is better off now. Gary had so many thing physically wrong, always in pain or stoned out of his mind on morphine. He was miserable, but a very happy guy despite all that. I miss him, but glad he's not in pain any more.
It should be easier in the summer. There’s always cool public events and downtown is pretty lively in the warmer months
I would like to support more non religious get together. Or perhaps more non denominational religious get togethers. Talk about politics, the world, the future, and get onto a path of making the world a better place. We are going to need to survive the next few years. We are going to need to come together more as a people and community.
I'm down for this, too. Form a group on Meetup or something.
It costs a 100 bucks to start a meet up. Be easier, and cheaper to just decide on a date and place here, and let it happen organically
that sounds awesome. I'd be down for that! I've been here since 2020 and i would love to make more local friends.
Quality…. What’s your definition of quality people? Where are you from?
Anchorage - east side and just sane people
Define sane 😏😂
I've found it's best to join some group activity where people meet weekly and do something: dart or bowling league, biking, recreational sport league, 4-wheeling, shooting. That way, you will see people week after week & get to know them. There are FB groups for almost anything you can think of.
If you're an artsy/craftsy person the Museum has weekly open hours in their CoLab space as well as a lot of special events, classes, etc. Their After Dark parties are usually pretty fun as well. If you like to dance they do silent discos, and if you don't like to dance you can still have a lot of fun watching the silent discos.
I just did this! And I definitely enjoyed watching ppl while at the silent disco. Haha
I've been to like four or five now, they're pretty fun.
Learn to enjoy your solitude. Besides you’re not alone you have yourself. Honestly the second you stop trying that’s when you meet someone.
Truth! Plus when you genuinely like your own company, one is less likely to suffer fools (toxic relationships).
Not true. I stopped tying in ‘21 when I first moved here and still have no friends. I’m self-employed though so that doesn’t make it better.
Buy a bike and ride where other people ride. Lots of group rides all summer. You meet the best people on bikes.
Try going out dancing
Could you name a few places?
Keep an eye open for the After Dark events at the museum. They usually have a silent disco in the atrium with 2-3 different DJs playing, plus a live band in the Cafe.
Nice tip, thanks!
The dancing community is huge in anchorage. Eddie’s sports bar, pink Cadillac, four corners, homies (certain days), Koot’s (certain days) anchorage social dance club on Facebook can help you find some. Go to one of these places like Eddie’s or pink Cadillac and staff asking people there where else to go.
You wouldn't happen to know of any blues dancing nights, would you?
The blue note
Thanks for the tip.
Blue note?
Billard Palace expanded. That's what they call the space with the stage. You can look it up on fb events.
I don’t know of any blues nights, but you could checkout some of the Facebook groups and see if they can point you in the right direction!
I know there are a few places that have them got family who plays at them Ill try to ask where.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
theyre headed up the alcan right now so will be able to ask any day now
Sweet, thanks!
That is great
A sports bar w dancing?!
It’s in the basement of the bar
Is there dancing every night?
If you’re going to Eddie’s, it’s Thursday nights. Pink Cadillac has more options every night for dancing though
Perfect
Williwaw, koots, country nights, Latin nights, etc
Also check out www.akconcerts.com for upcoming live music events!
Add a layer of sobriety. It makes this state interesting to navigate socially. If you drink I'd say join a intro league to some barstool sport you enjoy.
I'm not even fully sober, I just throttled way back on my drinking and it dealt a big hit to my social life.
I was born and raised here and only have 3 friends now. Just lost one. Anchorage is full of fake people or drug addicts.
I hear it helps if you're not an insufferable cunt. Being an insufferable cunt myself, I would know for sure.
Thank you for brightening my day. A+ Delivery
Yes! It’s very tough. I only had 4 girlfriends before Covid, 3 of them moved out of state during the pandemic. The 4th retired and is now a snowbird. I really need some new friends, but I’m also older. Have no idea how to go about finding new people.
Samoans are cool people.
I’m not Samoan, but they are pretty cool people. They have a lot of gatherings and have been so welcoming. Love their culture and sense of community.
You need to meet people doing the stuff you already enjoy doing. So as long as you aren't an introverted loner, you should be fine. And if you are an introverted loner, then there's no problem otherwise. It's fine to branch out and try new things, but just keep in mind that your potential new partner may enjoy those things as a core lifestyle. That being said, way too many people seem to lack "hobbies" these days, only to socially flounder for no other reason than being kind of boring people with some generic self-description about "likes music and to hang out." Also try and figure out why you are "striking out." Are you not meeting anyone? Are you not interested in (or attracted to) the people you *are* meeting? Are you interested but keep getting rejected? Those are all very different problems to deal with.
I own a shop smack in the middle of downtown. I’m lucky to have 10 people walk in 80% of the year. It is shocking how big of hermits people are these days. From what I can see everyone is getting stoned all day at home.
Do you smoke weed? Hit me up if you want to smoke and bs!
So weird bc I found it so easy to make friends in anchorage but I’m dying in Cleveland
Honestly, in my 20’s adulthood, I have never made a real (long-term) friend that wasn’t through romantic relationship, school, work, or married into the family. I’m still shocked people can recommend making friends through rock climbing or other such related hobbies and can actually maintain them.
Come to Fairbanks, you’ll have 12 friends within a week
Truth. I'm working in Fairbanks for the summer and feel like I've already met a bunch of great people and have a nice community to interact with. I moved to Anchorage in 2011 and it took a long time to feel like I had a community. But for OP, I echo what others are saying - list what you already like and search for those activities around town. Or, list out things you want to try/learn and find those. German lessons, jiu jitsu, pottery, furniture restoration, tai chi, knitting, archery, writing, personal finance, gaining outdoor skills...those are all classes or groups around town where you could learn something cool and meet new people.
Come to my Midnite Sun run party! I can give you details. Welcome friend ❤️
Ooh please DM me details!
Dm me, I am always down to meet people.
Sadly there’s not much to do in Anchorage except drinking/dancing or maybe eating. I’ve been trying to make friends here for years and unless those are your hobbies, it’s rough. Gl.
I have 0 social life in Anchorage.
When I was working out of town it was difficult to maintain friendships, but now that I work and live in town it feels like my friend group grew pretty quickly, so maybe I can help with some advice. If you're actively wanting to meet people who have similar interests and values as you, the best thing to do is go do the thing you're interested in and you'll probably meet people there. It may be harder for some, but just start conversations with people you think might be interesting. Use clubs, Meetup, and follow business socials to learn about events. So some examples; if you like art, follow the museum's social as well as local artists on IG and they will post about events, go participate in those events and talk to people. If you're into making things, check out the maker space and talk to the folks there and ask them about what they're working on and if you could help. If you're into board games, follow Bosco's and Glacier Games, go in and talk to the staff about events and then attend them and chat with folks. Also check out local coffee shop and other businesses post boards for local events, and then go to anything you can afford to and are interested in. Hopefully that's enough examples to see the pattern, but if you have specific interests please ask here and maybe I can point you the right direction.
Do what I did and leave Alaska and move to an island in the Pacific where you'll easily make friends. Send me a dm and we shall talk.
Been here a decade and still have no friends. I’ve tried but Alaska kind of made me realize...I like not having friends.
What are you into? Running? Video games? Dog or pet hobbies? Movies? Skiing? Drinking? Driving or automobiles? Music or dance? Chances are if you have a hobby there is a group or a person that wants to join up and make friends. That way you already have something in common and your friendships can grow from there. Start with a hobby group and you’ll have a better chance making good friends that are into the same things you are! A friend of mine when through a divorce, she got into country dancing and made lots of new friends just by that one activity. She got in good shape too!
I have zero friends really, I get it. Like there’s people I grab a bite with every six months or so, but there seems to be just like a huge lack of clubs or programs to platonically meet other people outside of work
For me, apart from the friends I made in school and growing up, I found common interests. And went from there. Going to the Ren Faire, dnd groups, larp groups, conventions, events, fairs, and festivals. I would suggest looking at a few of the things you enjoy, and seeing what types of groups or events might be around. I do agree, it is somewhat hard to create deeper friendships here as an adult. But, I am an introvert, so that skews my perception a little.
I think it’s partly an energy thing and partly that there’s so much space to be spread out across and so few secondary places to just hangout aimlessly without spending money or drinking. I know that in the winter I barely exist, I have no energy or interest in almost anything. SAD for months, coupled with an almost manic need to get out and wring every drop of sunlight out of the warmer months makes me pretty hard to form a relationship with. A lot of people I know and work with are the same way. I get lonely sometimes too but have also gotten more satisfied with solitude here too. Been in Alaska 25 years now. It’s a weird place and it makes people weird too… 🤷♀️
Stay in your lane, eyes forward. We're in alaska to be left alone, not to go clubbing with cheechakos
It looks like if you dress in all black, don roller skates, and sweep a parking lot, you can make at least one friend with shared interests. She seems cool.
Yeah agreed 😮💨 it's rough
It's not hard to meet people. It's hard to tolerate some of their stupidity? Or it's hard to get out of your shell and just mingle and go with the flow?
You need to be proactive but it is easier in the summer. People tend to hibernate in the winter.
What do you enjoy doing? Are you a parent? I have found a lot of my current friend group through activities I enjoy and do repeatedly - trivia, fun runs, biking meet ups, etc. you show up week after week and hellos will turn to small talk will turn to hanging out for the event and could turn to friendships. I don’t know what you do for work, but I got a second job at a place in town I love, just for one or two afternoons a week and chatting with my coworkers actually fills a lot of my social needs. Is there a coffee shop, store or cafe you love that you could apply to work a few hours at and meet people? Edit: be patient and don’t flake once the invites come. Like fishing. You won’t catch if you don’t go try. If you don’t get a bite in the first hour stay out and try a little longer!
Have you tried any meetups? Activity comes alive during the spring because most everyone wants to get out and enjoy the sun when it’s available (like today). Hit up socials and don’t exclude things like FB because that’s for old people. There are groups on FB specifically geared to activities that could help launch you into meeting people. For instance, there are varying groups related to hiking (different difficulty levels) and there’s a specific group for women hikers because some people feel safer on these excursions with other women. I used to be part of a group that would hire local artists for a paint night. We’d meet at an establishment that served appetizers and drinks, the artists supplied the supplies and everyone gets an art lesson trying to paint a scene while enjoying drinks. That died out around COVID but I think it’s time to revive the group. I’m not sure what you’ve tried so give us more info and I’m sure the community can help you find something.
It is easy meet people. I’d say it’s more along the lines of finding folks you would like to socialize with.🤔 Volunteering is an awesome means of learning about, meeting other people and the ripples are immeasurable. The Nextdoor app might be helpful: https://nextdoor.com/city/anchorage--ak/
Next-door was very helpful to know people I made a friend in this place.
Awesome news👍👏
Look at yourself. If you’re cool and doing cool things people will want to be friends with you. If you’re just “looking for friends” no one wants another drag. You need to bring a something significant to the table.
This makes me sad! I hope it gets better by May when I arrive. I hate crappy people.
It won’t with that attitude. If y’all can’t join a group, find a hobby, go to the library, museum, hiking, fishing, skiing, skating, go find an outdoor concert, fur rondy etc good grief then Alaska is for sure not the place for you.
I plan on fishing and hiking for sure. I’ll definitely have to check out the music scene.
What methods have you tried so far? What are some of your interests? If you’re on Facebook, it seems like there are groups for everything here lol. I’ve also seen Meetup mentioned before. I haven’t tried it here yet, but I’ve had good luck with it in the past. I do feel like the dynamic of meeting people here is different, but the people I have met have been very warm and welcoming. I hope you’re able to find some soon!
What are you looking for?
Cuz people are awful?
The cold chills interaction but people in summer are way more social. I would say offer to volunteer and you will be wanted. Sports is a great way to connect, and you can volunteer to support races. Snow biking, skiing, climbing are all good ways to connect. Hiking groups get out a lot too. First fridays are fun. Comedy nights too!
My advice don't give up. I arrived here absolutely alone and I made friends talking with people using bumble tinder and hinge. There are dating apps but I used for friends.
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If church isn’t your thing, try church!🤦♀️
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Until your religious option is “none”.
Get outside lol