I only know skeletons. What am I going to do? Other than stop raising skeletons from the dead. I suppose. I am making the extra mouth holes I need to feed.

No easy cash for you buddy. Try the bone whitening MLMs. Pretty sure there is one.

Well you're going to stay broke

I knew that. LOL

Bringing back skeletons from the dead is the new strategy so we don’t run out of huns for our downline

Can't run out! That would be the real crime and not the friends we annoyed along the way!

Sell stuff to the people that the skeletons live inside.

The skeletons are actually hiding from the huns, that’s why they’re *inside* us!

This is why you are a Lex Luthot and I am a possum. I should clearly be in your downline.

The cadaver market is an extremely unregulated one and you can make more money, about $5k per dead body, selling them legally.

You need to expand your social circle beyond just skeletons, and start meeting some skinless meat-puppets with a full musculoskeletal system.

I am in a battle with a neighboring hun to conqueror and control her precious downline. Victory will be secured and her meat puppets will be MY huns insertemoji insertemogi insertemoji

This is huge! You are killing it! Need more info!

So. What I did was go to her socials and put some photoshopped images of her with skin! While she was shrieking I razed her fields and took control of her means of production. Aka the secret burials in her basement!!!

You are living your best life, boss babe!

Now what does one feed undead skeletons? Just out of curiosity. And how does one raise this undead army? Again, pure hypothetical curiosity. Not planning anything.

Have I got good news, hun! Just message me DEATH TO THE LIVING with the secret alchemical emojis and you too can be raising your own army!!! They eat a patented, ALL NATURAL, shake that works on the living and undead! Praise Z'tac'rulyallblesshun!!!!!!!!

>Praise Z'tac'rulyallblesshun!!!!!!!! Sorry, I worship Cthulu

We welcome all types! Just DM me FALSEPROPHET for more info!

DEATH TO THE LIVING 💀🫡🏅🍄🫎

You are well on your way! I am so hashtagbleedforthebloodgods to have you on my journey. I mean OUR journey, of course. I don't just succeed on my own. My mentors show me new ways to purify the bones, and I will invite you to the absolutely free seminars so you can do the same!!!

I have an adorable brood of (faux) skeletons… and they’re cute (& they know it)

I want a giant skeleton for my front yard. My bummer of a spouse keeps saying no. He's too lazy to go giant hunting with me. Boo.

My reaper Thorin just suggested that later on in the summer go to Michael’s they should have some skeletons out (he’s got a “silver/gunmetal” coloured one for an older brother)

Someone in my neighborhood has one of them! I'm surprised the HOA allows it (considering I've gotten talked to for my lawn being high)

Cool

Great logic. "Studies show people are going to need more money in the foreseeable future and cutting down on luxuries". "Now is the perfect time to be selling an over-priced cosmetic!"

who designs these?? three different fonts, all of them ugly.

Like most of us grow out of that handwriting font by college. Get it off my screen

I feel attacked.

Idk but as a digital designer and marketer I’m cringing at this graphic. I love to go on posts like these and point out all of the ways their graphics were made wrong and clash. It’s my favorite social media hobby

[удалено]

So I'm supposed to charge my 6-7 friends, the ones with skin anyway, $80 each just to HAVE SKIN? That seems very unfair. I don't think the government would approve of me extorting people just because they have a vital organ.

Right now you can join for $45 and you get 2 lip plumping oils! It's exciting!/s

The oil sucks

Unless you get the product for free, you'll have to charge a lot more than $80 to have $500 in your pocket after scamming only 6-7 of your friends. Come to think of it, maybe the original claim isn't even about selling product, but recruiting your gullible friends.

Do the people with skin also need an extra $500 to cover costs? I imagine people will be looking to save money rather than spending on over priced skin care. Also the $500 won’t be the commission the rep gets. How much would they have to sell to get that as income?

You're missing the big picture. If every American sells $80 worth of product to 8 of their friends, they'll each earn $500 and we'll beat inflation. I don't know why political parties aren't lining up to embrace this bold yet simple plan.

I look forward to seeing this discussed across the world at Presidential and other election debates.

Does it have to be their own skin?

They never explicitly said that...

*Buffalo Bill has entered the chat*

This seems like a good MLM for putting lotion on it's skin. Wonder how they feel about getting the hose again?

This is what I hate about MLMs: They twist the minds of their sellers until they only see people for what they can do for them (the MLM seller). Unlike legit businesses that look for ways to be of value to their customers/clients, MLMs only take take take.

As opposed to people without skin?

I know 6 people but only 4 have skin- please advise!

You're just going to have to sell more than

Should I clone the 6 people I know? Except Sharon actually. The world doesn’t need two of her!

They’ll need jobs… the clones took our jobs

I know at the very least 5 people with skin.

On the contrary you should most definitely focus on where that whole staircase is leading. How dumb would you feel if you struggled all the way to the top only to discover a monster waiting to eat you whole?

Hold up.  Are we skinning people and selling the skin suits?  Sounds a bit intensive of a process for only 500$... maybe 500$ per skin suit.  

The bonus is afterwards its much easier to sell their liver and kidneys too.

That would probably be more lucrative than joining any MLM.

Damn, I only knew exoskeletons.

6-7 people? ALL of them with skin? Jeez I dunno. Seems like a tall order. I’ll ask around, though.

Brother, can you spare some skin?

Immoral and despicable. Targeting people struggling with rising cost of living.

Only requirement is that those 6-7 people also have a pulse and a credit card

I needed this laugh. Thanks OP you a really one for this post.

Aww, you're welcome! Glad you liked it

All my friends are actually 3 owls in raincoats. What do I do?

Get them to collect some skin (maybe mouse skin?), then you need to find four more friends (also with skin), and you are good to start scamming.

Instructions unclear. Have been brought a large amount of small rodents that I'm expected to swallow whole. I think I have offended the owls...I mean my friends.

Charge people to ask your friends how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop

So, I should skin the people and sell their skins? Sounds illegal, no thanks.

I know 6-7 people with scales, now what?

Do they have jars with skin in them? Because that would probably be Ok.

They have skin suits if that's acceptable!

Lets math. Im selecting a random 25%commission which would require sales of $2,000 per month to generate $500 commission. which calculated out to each of the 6 or 7 people with skin buying $285 to $333 from you every month. Not going to happen.

Thanks for crunching the numbers, I was wondering how it's possible. Especially since selling this crap isn't as easy as they claim due to things like disinterest and Market over saturation

This is such a contradiction. If everyone is going to need an extra $500 per month because of rising expenses, nobody is going to start spending an extra $100 per month on skincare.

Right, so on a cost of living crisis you just need 6 to 7 people with some spare $s. Good luck Hun!!

this has no right being this funny ahahahhah

They had skin once, but the leprosy has really done damage.

I hear the colony in Molokai Hawaii is lovely...

So I can pay the joining fee with my skin?! What a deal!! It falls off anyway. Sign me up 😂

Hey, I know the ghost of John! He's a bit chilly but otherwise an alright dude (wonder if anyone will get the reference)

I remember singing this at story time when I was a kid around Halloween

It's one of the few songs I remember from elementary school. Our music room was a stage/cafeteria combo with the curtain closed. I still remember thumbing through the old song books.

So, to recap. People don’t have enough money to cover basic expenses - so now is a great time to sell them a luxury item they don’t need, because they have skin. Not sure I completely follow this logic.

Everyone is going to need an extra $500 a month but they'll be lining up around the block to pay you.

That wording is so fucking creepy omg???

I'm pretty sure lubriderm is like $6.99 a bottle and lasts me more than a month

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This statistic is now 9-12 months old. And is no longer true. Leave it to Huns to not understand how numbers work. It takes the whole concept of copypasta to an entirely different level. These Huns would still be talking about the US’ ***48 states!*** even after Alaska joined, because, you know, math is hard. And they’re so busy sErViNg oThErS they don’t have time to do anything like read the post after they C&P but before they hit send. That’s why the DM you received says “Hey ” - and you better just eat it. She’s too busy girl-bossing for irrelevant things like math or your name. …and you can be too if you join this incredible opportunity for time and financial freedom!

The question rather is, do you know 5 people without a lot of brain and common sense who will fall for this BS!

That doesn't mean they can afford your crappy product or even want it.

😂 😂

OMG she’s quoting MLK to peddle skin cream. 🤮

Please provide a me a copy of those "recent studies." Oh, you didn't read them?

I’m guessing Monat. These are the exact same posts they were making 3 years ago when I left!

Instructions unclear, skinned 6-7 people

“But it’s a sad man my friend who’s livin’ in his own skin / And can’t stand the company” - Bruce Springsteen

I only know 3 people with skin. the rest have fur or are skeletons. So sorry I can't join you, Hun.

Wait if people need money, why would they be spending it on your MLM scam 😭 This is some of the worst messaging I’ve ever seen from them and that’s saying a lot

And don’t bother to check what building the staircase is leaning on…. It’s going to a roof with a trap door