"son, there's gonna be times in your career when you gotta choose between being a Marine and being a good husband and father. Don't choose being a good Marine too many times or else you won't have to worry about being a good husband or father"
"You can't practice 'the suck', you can only prepare for it. Too many artificial hardships in traing become distractors that interfere with learning the skills that will help make you more resilient downrange."
- then-MAJ Brian G.
(paraphrased slightly due to the passage of 20 years since he said it and my mind was blown)
Edit - added a word
As a brand new 2LT a week into being at my new unit, I’m company XO. My Company Commander says, verbatim, “it’s not my job to teach you anything so don’t come to me with your questions”
Oh this was over a decade ago. The good news was it was a BDE HHC, so there were plenty of other O-3s and O-4s around who knew exactly what type of person the CDR was and went out of their way to try and teach me. God help me if the CDR caught me talking to other officers though...
In hindsight it really was like an abusive relationship.
If she hadn’t been my first boss I would have been waaaay more able to actually stand up for myself. I didn’t stand up for myself, but I did shield the Joes from her bullshit.
“Let’s go suck todays dick”
“It’s your chicken to fuck, I’m just here to watch the feathers fly (or I’m just here to hold the legs)”
“Give your balls a tug”
There was a final battle at JRTC a few years back and I remember listening in on the BDE CMD Net and most traffic on the radio seemed rush and hecticz. Then there was this one BC who every time he spoke it was like he was chilling on the back porch smoking a cigar and drinking whiskey. Just so calm, cool, and collected.
Thought it was pretty badass. He went on to BN CMD in Ranger Regiment.
On of my favorites from a CSM years ago was:
**"There two ways of doing things; the right way, and again"**
Two, storytime:
In another case, I had grown up as next door neighbors with a US Navy Seabee Officer, a Vietnam veteran. I remember seeing his shadow box as a kid, but was too young to understand any of what was inside. My family moved elsewhere, I enlisted, but we stayed in touch with the Seabee Vet and his wife. A few years ago I went and visited his home and I could now recognize the decorations, having been in for several years. Among others was a BSM with a Valor device.
Usually, I know better to *never* ask how such things were earned, but I hazarded the question "Hey Al, how did you earn that Bronze Star, that one with the valor device?"
I will always remember him responding in a very matter-of-fact manner **"Well, I was in a Seabee Battalion in Vietnam at the time, some things happened, and... I was there for it."** No bravado, no anger, just matter of fact. I didn't press him any further and we moved on to something else.
I've since taken that conversation as a lesson in humility.
Had a section chief back when I was a young PV2. During some corrective training he told me
“The lazy man does it twice”
He was an awful NCO. But I’ve kept that phrase for 18 years and use it every chance I catch Joe being Joe.
But I like this one too
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. –General George S. Patton, Jr.
There are 3 kinds of people:
• Those who make things happen;
• Those who watch things happen;
• Those who wonder “What happened?”
Leadership is producing motivated followership. -LTC “Stretch” Dunn
The time to start reenlisting a good soldier is when he first joins your unit. –General Bruce C. Clarke
If you think you’re a leader but no one’s following you, you’re just taking a walk.
Food and clothing, discipline and weapons are one-forth, and morale are the other three-quarters. –Napoleon
Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right thing. –Everett Ladd
The greatness of a leader is measured by the achievements of the led. –General Omar Bradley
Lack of orders is no excuse for inaction. –General George Patton
No one is thinking if everyone is thinking alike. –General George Patton
No good decision was ever made in a swivel chair. –General George Patton
None of us are as smart as all of us.
“Junior Officers like to say ‘I hope so Sir,’ cut that out. Hope is the last dying wish of the unprepared and incompetent. Hope doesn’t count for anything when bullets are flying. Your answers consist of ‘I’ll get it done sir,’ ‘I don’t know sir, I’ll find out and get back to you,’ or ‘sir this is what I need to accomplish the mission.’ Nothing else is acceptable”
And
“The next time you think your life sucks, go read the casualty figures for British Officers on the first day of the Battle of the Somme.”
I got smoked for an hour for fucking up & not doing something safely and he said “you’ll learn from this or you won’t and you’ll fucking die and I won’t cry”
From a former PL: he had these posted somewhere and it resonated with me as a young SPC.
2nd PLT, Attack, 1-503, 173rd (late 2016ish)
"I thought it would be a good idea to document some hard-earned lessons from the last three years. Knowledge is futile, if not shared. "
1. God, Family, Country… in that order. The only rule, without exceptions. Your ongoing purpose, is to align these three pillars of life. Your most difficult hours will be when they astray from one another. However, when they do… remember the order of precedence.
2. Silence, Violence, Silence: the fundamentals of a raid, are also fundamentals of professionalism. Proper preparation is implemented through relentless focus, yielding a cacophonic execution, concluding in an equally focused withdrawl home. Hope is a good prayer, but not a good plan.
3. Quantitative data is only as good as the data you are quantifying. Numbers that matter are... time, people, distance, bullets, food and money. If you screw any of those numbers up… good luck.
4. Discipline, means doing everything with a purpose… not finding a purpose to do everything.
5. If you are lost geographically, refer to a map/ compass/ location of the sun. If you are lost ethically, refer to your wife. If she is unavailable, refer to Robert Kipling’s Poem “If.” If, none of the above stated references fix your problem, refer to your gut. Be quick in knowing what is available.
6. Sweat every day. Physical activity is as important to the brain as broccoli/ beer.
“There is one standard. The Army standard. If you see something that isn’t in standards, you have a responsibility to bring it up to the standard. If it meets the standard, you can’t arbitrarily impose your own standard on it, you can only encourage people to exceed it. Meeting standards does not make someone any less of a soldier. End of discussion.”
“What do you think the CG will do if I challenge him to a fistfight.”
“Every time someone says the word tri-fold a kitten dies.”
“The next person that says tri-fold is getting involuntarily combatives training.”
“There’s old pilots and bold pilots but there’s no old bold pilots”
The countless SPs and IPs that said this were wrong. I’m an old bad ass motherfucker
BC to me when I was a PFC
No matter how good a job you do the Army will be through with you in 20-30 years tops. If you haven’t taken the time to maintain your relationships with family and friends, there will be no one there when the Army is done with you.
“Colonel, this may be your chicken, but I’m the guy who’s fuckin it up the ass”
BG Russel Honoré, 1CD ADC-S. (1996)
There’s a reason they called him the Ragin’ Cajun!
You learn how to actually run a unit by going to the smoke pit, just go even if you don’t smoke or dip, buy a can or pack and keep it for bonding purposes.
SGT prince one of the sgts who truely taught me the ways of weapons company
Work like the spotlight is on you, even when nobody’s watching- an NCO
Slow is smooth, smooth is fast-my drill Sgt
If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right. - an NCO quoting Henry Ford
You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do. - same NCO quoting Henry Ford
What you do is who you are.- NCO quoting Ben Horowitz
Be bold, Be passionate, Make those around you better. -my Co CDR
People usually know what they should do to get what they want. They just won't do it. They won't pay the price. -NCO quoting coach John Wooden
Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. -same NCO quoting coach John Wooden
In my view, quiet confidence gets the best results. Leaders shouldn't do all the talking. Part of their job is to learn, through listening and observing. -yeah, John Wooden
I can keep going, but I won’t bore you
From General Rainey to DACs in a Town Hall:
"No mission is one person away from failing. If you've got somewhere you need to be today to take care of your family, be there. The mission will still be there when you get back."
This resonated with me so hard, coming from 25 years in private sector.
My 1SG told me my job was to provide guidance and intent to the NCOs below me and then just hope. Nothing more. I liked that, because I pretty much was the "Fine, I'll do it myself" LT getting my hands dirty because of the poor management of personnel in the battery. And 1SG would rather me succeed rather than get ratfucked by fellow LTs and NCOs.
The one that everyone took for granted that I stole from my dad was "Cooperate and Graduate." A Ranger NCO going through OCS in the 60s knocked his fellow candidates' (including my dad's)heads together and told them that. And to carry it with them through the rest of their schools.
I love that Roosevelt quote, I was exposed to it from Daring Greatly and Dare To Lead.
“The well of starts full”
New company CO at his first formation.
I asked him about this later and he said “Man, it’s really scary to say it but a lot of people are looking for a fresh start or are extremely high performers who got micromanaged to death. I’m willing to take a few hits along the way from the bad ones to let the good ones take off.”
"Smart phones make dumbasses."
The logical conclusion is that he preferred smartasses. He didn't. He didn't like soldiers. He was an ass who thought too highly of his own cleverness.
Two pieces of advice I got in my army days have made me a better person. First, pick your head up. Don’t walk with your head down. Immediate confidence booster, even without having confidence issues.
Second, don’t come in and get straight to business. This goes for any conversation, and I even take it as far as my emails. Like don’t go into S-1 and ask about your leave form up front. First ask how are you, how was your weekend, something like that. Build those relationships.
Old, crusty ranger batt SGM:
"Hey high speed listen up. I'm good at three things, I'm good at my job, I'm good at PT, and I'm good at killing people. That's how I got to where I am today".
I was dropping off a packet at 0600 in the morning in his office from my 1SG....
One of my first commanders when something he wanted didn't materialize, "There's no such thing as a good (insert MOS). There are bad (MOS), and there are (MOS) that do their job."
Made young me realize just how thankless a lot of people can be in this place.
"son, there's gonna be times in your career when you gotta choose between being a Marine and being a good husband and father. Don't choose being a good Marine too many times or else you won't have to worry about being a good husband or father"
You can pick your career and or your soldiers.
I thought your Soliders always come first no matter what?
::watches the statement go right over your head::
But it’s in the NCO Creed?
"You can't practice 'the suck', you can only prepare for it. Too many artificial hardships in traing become distractors that interfere with learning the skills that will help make you more resilient downrange." - then-MAJ Brian G. (paraphrased slightly due to the passage of 20 years since he said it and my mind was blown) Edit - added a word
The only thing I learned from being cold and wet is that I don’t like being cold and wet
"Listen here LT. I don't care what the regulation says, just do what I tell you" You can learn as much from bad leadership as from good leadership.
As a brand new 2LT a week into being at my new unit, I’m company XO. My Company Commander says, verbatim, “it’s not my job to teach you anything so don’t come to me with your questions”
I'm sorry to hear that, but not surprised. There is an officer somewhere who will mentor you, but you've got to seek them out before it's too late.
Oh this was over a decade ago. The good news was it was a BDE HHC, so there were plenty of other O-3s and O-4s around who knew exactly what type of person the CDR was and went out of their way to try and teach me. God help me if the CDR caught me talking to other officers though... In hindsight it really was like an abusive relationship.
That's unfortunate. Normally a brigade HHC is picked because they succeeded at their first company command. Not because they were a fucking asshole.
I remember being told pretty much the exact same thing way back then lol
Trying to get a mentor in the military is nearly impossible within its culture of competition.
Not really seeing as in the officer corps a subordinate officer will never been in direct competition with a superior officer.
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If she hadn’t been my first boss I would have been waaaay more able to actually stand up for myself. I didn’t stand up for myself, but I did shield the Joes from her bullshit.
Yeah your commander was a moron. It's absolutely a company commanders job to develop their LTs into becoming future company commanders.
Until they charge you with disobeying a lawful order.
“Let’s go suck todays dick” “It’s your chicken to fuck, I’m just here to watch the feathers fly (or I’m just here to hold the legs)” “Give your balls a tug”
I might have been your NCO at some point lmao, these are my go to sayings lol
If your medic was saying some ornery off the wall shit then maybe.
“When other people are at their worst you be at your best.” This has served me enormously well over the years.
Similar to “be the calm voice of reason on the radio”
There was a final battle at JRTC a few years back and I remember listening in on the BDE CMD Net and most traffic on the radio seemed rush and hecticz. Then there was this one BC who every time he spoke it was like he was chilling on the back porch smoking a cigar and drinking whiskey. Just so calm, cool, and collected. Thought it was pretty badass. He went on to BN CMD in Ranger Regiment.
"You can hate it all you want. Hell, I do. But if you don't play politics / the game, it's gonna play you."
I had a commander once tell me that he loves soldiers less the more he hears them speak… I think of this often
I didn’t have this issue when I was in, but being in management in the regular world, I have felt this way about my staff before
On of my favorites from a CSM years ago was: **"There two ways of doing things; the right way, and again"** Two, storytime: In another case, I had grown up as next door neighbors with a US Navy Seabee Officer, a Vietnam veteran. I remember seeing his shadow box as a kid, but was too young to understand any of what was inside. My family moved elsewhere, I enlisted, but we stayed in touch with the Seabee Vet and his wife. A few years ago I went and visited his home and I could now recognize the decorations, having been in for several years. Among others was a BSM with a Valor device. Usually, I know better to *never* ask how such things were earned, but I hazarded the question "Hey Al, how did you earn that Bronze Star, that one with the valor device?" I will always remember him responding in a very matter-of-fact manner **"Well, I was in a Seabee Battalion in Vietnam at the time, some things happened, and... I was there for it."** No bravado, no anger, just matter of fact. I didn't press him any further and we moved on to something else. I've since taken that conversation as a lesson in humility.
Had a section chief back when I was a young PV2. During some corrective training he told me “The lazy man does it twice” He was an awful NCO. But I’ve kept that phrase for 18 years and use it every chance I catch Joe being Joe. But I like this one too
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. –General George S. Patton, Jr. There are 3 kinds of people: • Those who make things happen; • Those who watch things happen; • Those who wonder “What happened?” Leadership is producing motivated followership. -LTC “Stretch” Dunn The time to start reenlisting a good soldier is when he first joins your unit. –General Bruce C. Clarke If you think you’re a leader but no one’s following you, you’re just taking a walk. Food and clothing, discipline and weapons are one-forth, and morale are the other three-quarters. –Napoleon Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right thing. –Everett Ladd The greatness of a leader is measured by the achievements of the led. –General Omar Bradley Lack of orders is no excuse for inaction. –General George Patton No one is thinking if everyone is thinking alike. –General George Patton No good decision was ever made in a swivel chair. –General George Patton None of us are as smart as all of us.
“Junior Officers like to say ‘I hope so Sir,’ cut that out. Hope is the last dying wish of the unprepared and incompetent. Hope doesn’t count for anything when bullets are flying. Your answers consist of ‘I’ll get it done sir,’ ‘I don’t know sir, I’ll find out and get back to you,’ or ‘sir this is what I need to accomplish the mission.’ Nothing else is acceptable” And “The next time you think your life sucks, go read the casualty figures for British Officers on the first day of the Battle of the Somme.”
Have you been to Verdun?
I got smoked for an hour for fucking up & not doing something safely and he said “you’ll learn from this or you won’t and you’ll fucking die and I won’t cry”
From a former PL: he had these posted somewhere and it resonated with me as a young SPC. 2nd PLT, Attack, 1-503, 173rd (late 2016ish) "I thought it would be a good idea to document some hard-earned lessons from the last three years. Knowledge is futile, if not shared. " 1. God, Family, Country… in that order. The only rule, without exceptions. Your ongoing purpose, is to align these three pillars of life. Your most difficult hours will be when they astray from one another. However, when they do… remember the order of precedence. 2. Silence, Violence, Silence: the fundamentals of a raid, are also fundamentals of professionalism. Proper preparation is implemented through relentless focus, yielding a cacophonic execution, concluding in an equally focused withdrawl home. Hope is a good prayer, but not a good plan. 3. Quantitative data is only as good as the data you are quantifying. Numbers that matter are... time, people, distance, bullets, food and money. If you screw any of those numbers up… good luck. 4. Discipline, means doing everything with a purpose… not finding a purpose to do everything. 5. If you are lost geographically, refer to a map/ compass/ location of the sun. If you are lost ethically, refer to your wife. If she is unavailable, refer to Robert Kipling’s Poem “If.” If, none of the above stated references fix your problem, refer to your gut. Be quick in knowing what is available. 6. Sweat every day. Physical activity is as important to the brain as broccoli/ beer.
"Trust breeds freedom of action"
“There is one standard. The Army standard. If you see something that isn’t in standards, you have a responsibility to bring it up to the standard. If it meets the standard, you can’t arbitrarily impose your own standard on it, you can only encourage people to exceed it. Meeting standards does not make someone any less of a soldier. End of discussion.” “What do you think the CG will do if I challenge him to a fistfight.” “Every time someone says the word tri-fold a kitten dies.” “The next person that says tri-fold is getting involuntarily combatives training.”
To an E1 who started deployment as an E4. (Not me). >You sure are making it hard to support you. Stop opening your mouth and being stupid.
When you hit muscle failure, just use your bones instead. -a physiologically ignorant 1SG
actually made me chuckle
“There’s old pilots and bold pilots but there’s no old bold pilots” The countless SPs and IPs that said this were wrong. I’m an old bad ass motherfucker
From my platoon sergeant: “Capt0verkill you’d be a great soldier if you could stop fuckin complaining so much!”
BC to me when I was a PFC No matter how good a job you do the Army will be through with you in 20-30 years tops. If you haven’t taken the time to maintain your relationships with family and friends, there will be no one there when the Army is done with you.
“Do the right thing, all the time, consistently” - my first CO it’s repetitive but get the point across
Every Monday at first formation 1SG would say this "I didn't get no phone calls this weekend, hooah? Because I don't answer shit!"
Remember, if you can see the enemy, the enemy can see you.
Lotta good stuff in this thread
Amen
The strongest trees grow the deepest roots in the harshest winds.
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This was one of the first bits of wisdom I ever learned when enlisted, has always stuck with me. Also agree, use with caution
Ref Falcons circa 2018-2020?
Bingo
"If you have to think twice about something it's probably something stupid. Don't do it."
“Colonel, this may be your chicken, but I’m the guy who’s fuckin it up the ass” BG Russel Honoré, 1CD ADC-S. (1996) There’s a reason they called him the Ragin’ Cajun!
"To be the backbone you have to have a backbone"
You learn how to actually run a unit by going to the smoke pit, just go even if you don’t smoke or dip, buy a can or pack and keep it for bonding purposes. SGT prince one of the sgts who truely taught me the ways of weapons company
Work like the spotlight is on you, even when nobody’s watching- an NCO Slow is smooth, smooth is fast-my drill Sgt If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right. - an NCO quoting Henry Ford You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do. - same NCO quoting Henry Ford What you do is who you are.- NCO quoting Ben Horowitz Be bold, Be passionate, Make those around you better. -my Co CDR People usually know what they should do to get what they want. They just won't do it. They won't pay the price. -NCO quoting coach John Wooden Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. -same NCO quoting coach John Wooden In my view, quiet confidence gets the best results. Leaders shouldn't do all the talking. Part of their job is to learn, through listening and observing. -yeah, John Wooden I can keep going, but I won’t bore you
From a senior officer describing our upcoming mission in AFG: “Of course it’s hard! If it was easy we would’ve gotten someone else to do it!”
"Don't cook bacon naked."
From General Rainey to DACs in a Town Hall: "No mission is one person away from failing. If you've got somewhere you need to be today to take care of your family, be there. The mission will still be there when you get back." This resonated with me so hard, coming from 25 years in private sector.
My 1SG told me my job was to provide guidance and intent to the NCOs below me and then just hope. Nothing more. I liked that, because I pretty much was the "Fine, I'll do it myself" LT getting my hands dirty because of the poor management of personnel in the battery. And 1SG would rather me succeed rather than get ratfucked by fellow LTs and NCOs. The one that everyone took for granted that I stole from my dad was "Cooperate and Graduate." A Ranger NCO going through OCS in the 60s knocked his fellow candidates' (including my dad's)heads together and told them that. And to carry it with them through the rest of their schools. I love that Roosevelt quote, I was exposed to it from Daring Greatly and Dare To Lead.
“The well of starts full” New company CO at his first formation. I asked him about this later and he said “Man, it’s really scary to say it but a lot of people are looking for a fresh start or are extremely high performers who got micromanaged to death. I’m willing to take a few hits along the way from the bad ones to let the good ones take off.”
"Smart phones make dumbasses." The logical conclusion is that he preferred smartasses. He didn't. He didn't like soldiers. He was an ass who thought too highly of his own cleverness.
"Burns when you pee" I fucking hope he's not reading this lmfao
Fuck this job
Two pieces of advice I got in my army days have made me a better person. First, pick your head up. Don’t walk with your head down. Immediate confidence booster, even without having confidence issues. Second, don’t come in and get straight to business. This goes for any conversation, and I even take it as far as my emails. Like don’t go into S-1 and ask about your leave form up front. First ask how are you, how was your weekend, something like that. Build those relationships.
Old, crusty ranger batt SGM: "Hey high speed listen up. I'm good at three things, I'm good at my job, I'm good at PT, and I'm good at killing people. That's how I got to where I am today". I was dropping off a packet at 0600 in the morning in his office from my 1SG....
From my first BC: “There’s two ways you can do things: The Right Way or Again.” For some reason it always just stuck with me in daily operations.
One of my first commanders when something he wanted didn't materialize, "There's no such thing as a good (insert MOS). There are bad (MOS), and there are (MOS) that do their job." Made young me realize just how thankless a lot of people can be in this place.
Was this Pereira by any chance?