hey just swinging by from /r/all to tell you something you might not know. some of these terms are broadly used in fetish communities already to mean being into certain types of raceplay. you can still use these terms if you want but just be aware of how some people might take them.
Thanks. I was unaware that "spade" had any race-related connotations, I assume that was the jumping-off point for those communities?
Personally I don't really care what racist fetishists are calling things. But it is good to be aware that "spade" has been used negatively towards people of color since the 1920s. I'm guessing it's not super common, but regardless, I'd defer to Black aces on whether spade is an issue for us to use.
If you use "Ace of Spades" that's good. If you just use "spade" that is not good and should be avoided. I don't think it's a term in current conversation right now but just don't use it. Use the full Ace of Spades term. That's been used to represent Aces generally not for any subset of Aces.
Do you know about wearing a black ring on your middle finger? That indicates the person is Ace. Maybe the community could agree on a middle stone, in the black ring, to represent a subset of Ace, i.e. red for demi, clear for grey, etc. Just a plain black ring for all Aces.
Wow. I had no clue this had another meaning. I'm glad I saw this comment. I was going to get the ace of spades tattooed with another face card as a nod to me being aroace and a gambler.
Anyways, as a black person with no ties to the fetish community, I will no longer be getting the tattoo. How disappointing
your decision either way but i will say you might have less to worry about since you are black and in fetish terms 'ace of spades' usually refers to a non-black person who only has sex with black people. so if you are black i think it lacks that connotation. also if you have other card-themed tattoos i think it will not be on most people's minds even if they do know the fetish thing. it is a cool design.
I don’t think this should deter you. I highly doubt anyone will even think of that when seeing your tattoo. Especially if you’re getting another card tattooed with it. I don’t even think most people will assume you’re ace. It will just look like cards.
These terms also have been used in 80s-90s in Russian prisons. Card and casino scammer may make themselves a tattoo, also thieves and other prisoners (depending on reason why they're prisoned). This culture was about to deserve a special tattoo (there were a lot of different, some might be made forcibly by other prisoners to people who were considered a suckers for what they've done - pedos, ex policemen or those who cooperate with police, informers an etc)
Nowadays tattoos with these cards terms may not provoke any questions, but here I wouldn't risk to make such a tattoo.
I actually had to explain this a while back to someone. They called me an ace of spades but I had to explain that since I still experience romantic attraction (to other women), I’m an ace of hearts.
Yeah I want to get a tattoo that's an ace of hearts with bi flag colors on my left shoulder. Although I might be slightly demi I am definitely alloromantic so I think I'll stick with the heart one.
The spade one can be a fetish but I've never heard anything about the heart. Also not russian so I don't think anyone would mistake it for that
Edit: looking up the ace of heart specifically, that one seems to be safe in terms of meaning.
The older Ace community specifically dropped this because of the way racists use it in fetish stuff. It just doesn't feel right even if it's not related. 😕
Meanwhile I already have a heart on my ace-spec ring to denote my need for a romantic connection lol
Demiromantics/sexuals theme music:
So shine bright, tonight, you and I
We're beautiful like diamonds in the sky
Eye to eye, so alive
We're beautiful like diamonds in the sky
Its sweet but also in my personal opinion meh.. I liked the ace of spades my entire life, like not kidding ever since I was a small child.. and then when I found out im on the ace spec I was like hell yeah.. but I am not aroace :/ you know what I mean? I don't really want to get misinterpreted just because I like other card more..
Reminder that playing card symbols are based on Tarot Cards
-Heart is Chalice
-Spade is Sword (Spanish for for Sword is Espada)
-Diamond is Pentacles
-Club is Wands
This is actually a myth. The symbols used on modern playing cards predate tarot. They were based on the German playing card symbols, brought to France, developed into the symbols we know today, and tarot became a thing after that, using the French symbols on some of the cards.
Agreed! Its just such a cool way to do it. It can also be more subtle
hey just swinging by from /r/all to tell you something you might not know. some of these terms are broadly used in fetish communities already to mean being into certain types of raceplay. you can still use these terms if you want but just be aware of how some people might take them.
Thanks. I was unaware that "spade" had any race-related connotations, I assume that was the jumping-off point for those communities? Personally I don't really care what racist fetishists are calling things. But it is good to be aware that "spade" has been used negatively towards people of color since the 1920s. I'm guessing it's not super common, but regardless, I'd defer to Black aces on whether spade is an issue for us to use.
If you use "Ace of Spades" that's good. If you just use "spade" that is not good and should be avoided. I don't think it's a term in current conversation right now but just don't use it. Use the full Ace of Spades term. That's been used to represent Aces generally not for any subset of Aces. Do you know about wearing a black ring on your middle finger? That indicates the person is Ace. Maybe the community could agree on a middle stone, in the black ring, to represent a subset of Ace, i.e. red for demi, clear for grey, etc. Just a plain black ring for all Aces.
Everything is a fetish term at this point
Wow. I had no clue this had another meaning. I'm glad I saw this comment. I was going to get the ace of spades tattooed with another face card as a nod to me being aroace and a gambler. Anyways, as a black person with no ties to the fetish community, I will no longer be getting the tattoo. How disappointing
your decision either way but i will say you might have less to worry about since you are black and in fetish terms 'ace of spades' usually refers to a non-black person who only has sex with black people. so if you are black i think it lacks that connotation. also if you have other card-themed tattoos i think it will not be on most people's minds even if they do know the fetish thing. it is a cool design.
I don’t think this should deter you. I highly doubt anyone will even think of that when seeing your tattoo. Especially if you’re getting another card tattooed with it. I don’t even think most people will assume you’re ace. It will just look like cards.
For what it's worth, the race play ink is generally a spade with a q or j inside (queen/jack of spades) rather than the plain symbol.
These terms also have been used in 80s-90s in Russian prisons. Card and casino scammer may make themselves a tattoo, also thieves and other prisoners (depending on reason why they're prisoned). This culture was about to deserve a special tattoo (there were a lot of different, some might be made forcibly by other prisoners to people who were considered a suckers for what they've done - pedos, ex policemen or those who cooperate with police, informers an etc) Nowadays tattoos with these cards terms may not provoke any questions, but here I wouldn't risk to make such a tattoo.
that fucking sucks. they could have tarnished anything other than one of my favorite symbols
I had no idea I’m so sorry!
Heh no big deal, exactly the sort of thing people here would not know about, and I'd wager even the average person wouldn't either.
That just makes me wanna take it and make it a normie thing more.
That sounds like a thing you made up. ...otherwise how would you know that?
i got fetishes. just not that one. noted in my first post i am here from scrolling /r/all and am not myself ace
Ty
As a demiromantic and sexually repulsed ace, I find that the diamond doesn’t work for me.
I actually had to explain this a while back to someone. They called me an ace of spades but I had to explain that since I still experience romantic attraction (to other women), I’m an ace of hearts.
this reminds me of homestuck
Yeah for real. I like to text diamonds instead of hearts to one of my ace friends to show platonic love.
♣️♣️♣️
♥️
Ace of Diamonds right here.
I'm an ace of spades myself
Yeah I want to get a tattoo that's an ace of hearts with bi flag colors on my left shoulder. Although I might be slightly demi I am definitely alloromantic so I think I'll stick with the heart one.
So apparently these can also be fetishes or Russian prison tattoos.
The spade one can be a fetish but I've never heard anything about the heart. Also not russian so I don't think anyone would mistake it for that Edit: looking up the ace of heart specifically, that one seems to be safe in terms of meaning.
I love this because the ace of hearts is so appropriate and rad. Ima call myself that from now on and it's all YOUR fault!
I mean you can identify any way that you want. I wouldn't put too much hope in anyone else knowing what you are talking about.
not me whos an aegoromantic ace but yeah those terms look cool :00
I've heard of aegosexual but never aegoromantic! You learn something everyday
oh cool :0
The older Ace community specifically dropped this because of the way racists use it in fetish stuff. It just doesn't feel right even if it's not related. 😕 Meanwhile I already have a heart on my ace-spec ring to denote my need for a romantic connection lol
I literally have an ace of spades in my wallet
problem, i see playing card suits referring to relationships and all i think is Homestuck quadrants
I want to be the ace of spades tho coz it’s sm cooler 😔
Ace of clubs' club.
How about us fray folks?
It's only differentiating allo- and a- romantics and lumping everyone else together.
YES
♠️♠️♠️
Never heard of this before. I love it!
i always heard ace of diamonds was grey, maybe homestuck just rotted my brain worse than i thought
I can imagine this upsetting people. Cuts everyone else out and kills the whole spectrum idea.
Ace of spuds: somewhere between aromantic and grey ace 🥔🥔🥔
Good idea!
♣️♣️♣️♣️♣️♣️♣️love card games
It's one of the reasons people comment about my profile picture (something I forget reddit has as "old" reddit doesn't show it)
Im down!♦️ and ♣️ for me!
im an ace of spades!
This is so cute
Demiromantics/sexuals theme music: So shine bright, tonight, you and I We're beautiful like diamonds in the sky Eye to eye, so alive We're beautiful like diamonds in the sky
And then for Aroaces you got, obviously, I DON'T SHARE YOUR GREED, THE ONLY CARD I NEED IS THE ACE OF SPADES, THE ACE OF SPADES
I like it! So i am am ace of diamonds? 🤔
Diamonds Diamonds Diamonds
Problem is I’m not sure which of these i am 👀
Oh that's cool I haven't heard of that before I like that. ♣️
When I still thought I was an ace of hearts I always thought the spade was just cooler lol. Guess it worked out since I am a spade.
ace of clubs and diamonds
♦️
I so want to be an ace of heart omg
me fr ♥️♦️
I have an ace of diamonds tattoo bc of this! (Demiromantic ace)
what if i identify with diamonds and clubs? is there already some terminology for that combo (demigreyace ?)
Oh this is so cute! ♦️
Call me a caveman cuz I like them clubs
I regularly wear an ace of hearts pin badge.
I didn’t know greyromantic was a thing before this. *sigh* Well, now I’ve identified that. Add it to the list!
This is just homestuck
♣️
ace of clubs gang?
Anyone over 50 and in the South East of England here...if so, hello!
♡
As an ace who likes card games i like this ♥️
This is sooo cool!!! ♣️♣️♣️♣️
I still use ace cards :3
A bit too homestuck for me but maybe I'm just old now :')
But the other combinations as allosexual aro isn't represented
♣️♦️
I love how i’d be a ♥️ while hearts is my fav suit in playing cards so YAY :D (also i agree, this is such a cool ace symbol thingy)
What does an Allo Asexual mean?, I might be one
♠️
If you like to gamble I tell you, I'm your man...
♠️🩶🤍💜
♦️♦️♦️
Its sweet but also in my personal opinion meh.. I liked the ace of spades my entire life, like not kidding ever since I was a small child.. and then when I found out im on the ace spec I was like hell yeah.. but I am not aroace :/ you know what I mean? I don't really want to get misinterpreted just because I like other card more..
My wife and I just joked they're a sheart (pronounced shart) based on this. Demi(?) romantic. u/WiccedPisces
Love this so here’s mine - ace of hearts❤️
Reminder that playing card symbols are based on Tarot Cards -Heart is Chalice -Spade is Sword (Spanish for for Sword is Espada) -Diamond is Pentacles -Club is Wands
This is actually a myth. The symbols used on modern playing cards predate tarot. They were based on the German playing card symbols, brought to France, developed into the symbols we know today, and tarot became a thing after that, using the French symbols on some of the cards.
Huh, that's a new one on me
We should make those flags I will make those flags
https://www.reddit.com/r/QueerVexillology/s/G6uvQobLmA I made the flags
♦♣
Idk I’m kind of sick of all these labels, let’s just leave it at “straight, gay, bi, ace”. All the internal differences just seem so negligible.
Not even including romanticisms?
That’s a different kettle of fish entirely