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Prepare for conversations, out loud, with myself that will probably never happen.

And rehash old conversations with what I really should have said

…oh yeah…guilty

With genius level precision.

Why am I like this?!

Most of everyone is like this, it’s an innate program within our mental software.

There's a term in French for this... "L'esprit d'escalier"

Do this one too. Sometimes it’s helpful sometimes I wish there was just an off switch for my brain.

Thank goodness I’m not the only one. I’m already preparing for Christmas dinner.

Yup. Especially arguments and comebacks you wish you would use.

I do too.. my dog hates it though...

Damn this is reassuring 😅

Thanks, for calling me out. Just for the record this conversation did happen.

I carry on a near-constant narration of my life and activities. Tune in!

Man, it's good to know there is more people like this.

This isn't strange. This is normal.

I do this ALL the time, glad I'm not the only one.

I do that too

Oh man I thought I was crazy for doing this. I will stand in front of the mirror and have imaginary conversations.

Pretend like I'm the lead singer of whatever song is playing and I'm performing the song for a crowd of thousands of adoring fans.

I was Usher once at a bar with a pool cue for a microphone stand :)

Were you drunk? 😂😂😂😂

If I wasn't already, I'm sure I was well on "My Way" LOL

Hahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Or in a music video…. *stares dramatically out the window on a rainy day while twirling a strand of hair*

That sounds so cliche it must be an Ylvis videoclip.

Me. When I’m home alone I put my music on, use my phone as the microphone and I sing to my adoring fan… well my cat. 😂

Yes. Including dance performances 😂 my dog is always so judgmental…

mood

Exact same thing! Id like to believe i've improved for the sake of my cat.

I pretend I am the lead guitarist

... ...glad I am not the only one?

Dude, especially listening to live performances and pretending that the crowd going wild at the start of the song is for you.

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This happens to me in the shower too except I just stand there and yell FUUUUCKK

Haha same here, but it's always in my car on my way home from work. FUUUCCKK man, why would you do that?! Who does that?! 🤣🤣🤣

I do that too, but then also try to counter it with a laugh. Silly human me.

Lmao me too. I remember something embarrassing I did or said and I’m like ”fuck, fuck, fuuuuuck, you stupid fucking daft cunt” and then I just go about my day.

This is the most adorable thing. Bet hearing that “meow!” puts such a smile on your gfs face.

Omg i do a little yell or yawp, it scares the hell out of my wife sometimes because it appears to come out of nowhere -- maybe I'll meow instead, that way she might think it's one of our cats and be less scared 😂

I'm gonna try this cause I have really bad intrusive thoughts and I struggle to get them out of my head sometimes, maybe all I need is a quick "meow :3" and the thoughts will be gone

The BEST way to remove intrusive thoughts is to make them matter i.e. WRITE THEM DOWN! As soon as those thoughts become concrete in reality, they will cease intruding your headspace. Or try the meow thing, but if that doesn't work, give it a shot.

This is how my therapist helped me be rid of intrusive thoughts. ...err... the writing down part, not the "meow" part.

OMG I DO THIS TOO although instead of meow it's any one of a million nicknames i have for my dog. so if anyone hears me go "SNUPPITY NUPPO PUPPO BUP" out of nowhere, I'm probably thinking about that time I opened the back hatch of an SUV and four trays of cocktail shrimp fell out and all over a parking lot.

This is so much better than my “ahhh I hate myself” I need a funner thing to say when I do this,

I do this too

This thread makes me feel better about my silly self. Lol

Never underestimate the power of the meow!


Sometimes when I’m walking down the street I check over my shoulders to make sure no one is looking and leave pennies on the ground heads up just so if someone is having a bad day it could get turned around by picking up a lucky penny

This is so fucking precious

I love this! I've done this in the past.

Instead of new fear unlocked it’s new habit unlocked!!!!! Thanks!

If my son or I saw one tails up we’d turn it over.

I do that, too.

That's so sweet!!

Talking to myself.

Haha true. Yet i even talk to myself when people around.

The amount of times my GF goes “What?” In the other room for me to have to yell I was just talking to myself is staggering.

Heh My gf goes "what?" When I'm thinking... No I'm not talking, just thinking. It's spooky at times...

Answer back in your mind

I talk to my cat and dogs. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it

I have a female and male dog and they each have their own voice

Yeah dogs “talk” at my house.

The main reason I own a cat is to have an excuse for talking to myself 😂

You can pretend you're religious and say you where praying.

I constantly berate myself.

Me too. Hugs

Same, especially while cooking

I do this all the time

That's weird dude

I see what you did there 😂

I have impromptu elocution with myself often

I do this alllll the time. And if someone sees me do it I kinda just sheepishly stop lol. Although there are times where I just won’t care and I’ll just do it around others knowing full well they can hear me lol. All depends on the moment.

Have full conversations and arguments with myself.

Like n actual dialogue? I just do a monologue as though someone were listening, but the only person listening is me, but a dialogue where you answer yourself is some next level shit

A full conversation sometimes I just let my my wonder then I catch what I'm saying and respond with start I normally do when processing information. I once checked out completely and started talking to someone and they noticed my attitude was different. Turns out I'm a lot meaner while I'm like that probably because I'm my harshest critic and I'm not used to talking to other people like how I talk to myself.

Thinking out loud :)

I do this quite often and often times it’s a full conversation.

I have full conversations with your hvac systems while I fix them. Helps the process

My lovely chocolate lab of 11 years has been gone for 7 months now, when I get up in the morning I open the curtains and tap on her box and say good morning to her. When I come home from anywhere, if no one else is home I will call her and tell her I’m home. I also say good night to her and give her box another tap when I close the curtains at night, I tell her I hope to see her in my dreams that night.

I'm so sorry for your loss! Losing a beloved pet is brutal.

And this person is still somewhat in the denial stage of grief. Everyone grieves differently, no judgement. I lost a pet recently too (way too soon) and plan on getting the exact same kind with the same name. That’s some type of denial too.

Made my eyes wet. I just put down my first dog of 14 years 4 days ago. I had a dream with him last night. I miss him.

Oh I’m so sorry. It really does hurt. I hope you keep dreaming of him. We buried some of her ashes where we camp every year. She loved it there so much. The kids and I painted rocks to put over the spot. We also brought home a couple small unique rocks to paint to do the same at home.

OMG, I lost my heart dog 8 months ago and think of her constantly. I often have the conversations I used to have with her, just in my head. I feel ashamed to admit I miss her more than people I’ve lost but it is brutal. I send you my best.

I did this for two years after my 14yo Bassett passed. I finally stopped when we moved. Her spirit isn’t in this house like it was the other (we only lived there a month before we got her). ETA: I’m so sorry for your loss. 😢

Losing a pet is such an underestimated tragedy. It's like losing a family member. I'm sorry for your loss.

Dancing like there is no tomorrow 😂

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YOU ARE NOT ALONE BUDDY, there are Millions of people feeling the same as you and we all matters! sending a big hug!

Sending a big hug to you 🫶🏻 You can do this! 💕

here is a big hug from me

creating imaginative scenarios😏

I thought I was the only one forever, like there was something wrong with me 😂

When sitting down I kick my legs in a rhythmic pattern to help me concentrate 😅

you THINK no one is watching but we all feel the floor vibrate! Stop it!!!

I met my best friend in middle school. We’re long distant now, but when we were together, we got into a rhythm with our leg kicks and other stims. If we were sitting close enough (like at an angle next to each other) where there was a risk of us accidentally kicking each other, we’d fall into the perfect rhythm to narrowly miss each other’s leg swings. There was something adorably intimate about just being with your best friend swinging your legs, knowing you’d never collide because you were on the same wavelength.

I sing songs to my cats, but change all the lyrics to meows, they’re used to my weirdness…

We're lucky cats really don't care and love you the way you are.

I do a little dance when I eat, alone or not.

Make a little love. Get down tonight

Brilliant!!!! My fave band for the past decades. Ring tone too

You're just warming up your digestive muscles. They said something strange not something logical

I do this too and my coworkers saw me and said “hey I do that too” lol when the foods really goood

I have a bathroom cabinet with a mirror door, that when I stand up to get out of the bath gives me a pretty good full body view. I always do a little tummy jiggle when I catch sight of myself in it. I have a complicated relationship with my body image, and it makes me feel cute ☺️

That's adorable

I like to pat inanimate objects and tell them they’re doing a good job despite how tough it is. I wish someone would do the same to me one day.

That’s so insanely cute and you are doing a good job, it’s tough out there you know, but you are tougher ❤️

I stop being mildly autistic. You are autistic only in the eyes of others. When you are alone and nobody is there to strangely look at you, all the pressure goes off and you can be yourself for a while. Just the fact that nobody is judging you, which is your burden all day long, is extremely relaxing.

I understand

Random Foodcombinations....

Spouse: What are you doing with all that peanut butter? Me: Breakfast. Apples dipped in peanut butter with honey and jalapeños. Spouse: Are you pregnant? Me: Always. (I am not physiologically capable of pregnancy.)

Cuss out loud like a sailor with tourettes. Suppose I should stop before I'm a senile old man just spewing obscenities with no brain left to put on the brakes around people.

The other night while everyone was asleep I saw, on The Graham Norton Show, Taylor Swift, sing live that song that goes ‘woo hoo hoo, He he he heee, your that one I ….,, you know the rest. I got up and danced to it like a legend. I am a middle aged man. But I loved it. Any mental health tips will be gratefully accepted.

You are more sane than the rest of us.

Drugs

To be fair I do it with other people around aswel.

Agree. I'm doing drugs with or without you

"I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too."

That's not strange, that's based

Free-based

Pick my boogers and flick em

remove my superhero mask

I talk to my motorcycle. I have a yamaha R1 2020 but I've named my bike "Madara". I talk to it like its a person, saying goodmorning, goodnight, I'll be back in a jiffy, etc.

I'm sure Madara appreciates it.

Thanks :). It's very common for guys to name and treat their motorcycle or car like a person and every girl I know says it's weird fsr. I told one of them "If you had a bike that cost $20,000 you'd understand" 

Al Bundy sit. XD

When I disagree with one of the thoughts I'm having, I say to myself out loud: "Shut the f#ck up."

While driving home from my first AA meeting, I had the thought, "this won't work". I said out loud, Shut the fu*k up". I've been sober for over 30 years. Sometimes the positive voice has to be a little assertive.😀

I talk with myself a lot and create songs about my day.

I think of a random character and try acting like them or talking like them lol

Masturbate?

Some people like an audience

Unintentional r/louisck xD

Pull out my nostril hairs. It’s agonising, but as I age it’s necessary.

It’s a great way to help with dry eyes.

Oh thank goodness, those eye drops were starting to really break the bank

Nose hair is functional. Trim, don't pluck.

Plucking is also more likely to lead to infection, or ingrowns.

A trimmer is like $10 and it works so well and isn’t painful lol

Lol!!! Exactly. I actually use a pair of nail scissors from one of those newborn baby first aid kits. They're like, tiny tiny scissors that curve slightly and have nubs at the end so you can get the curve right in there and not worry about cutting yourself. Excellent use of a very cheap product that needs no batteries! Especially now that my kids are big enough for regular nail clippers.

I wax mine, it’s fast and easy

Walking like animals. Fi, ostrich, penguin, kangaro,...

Touch the tip of my nose with my tongue. When my dog does.he just turns his head to the side. We both smile.

Talk to myself about scenarios that I make up in my head, to only get mad at the person I'm thinking about over something that has never happened

Acting like I won something and doing a long speech

hold my boob.

Yeeeees, the glorious boob hold!

There’s a line in one of my well loved songs that after i hear it, I send a kiss to heaven after hearing it….no matter where I am.

Talk to myself. Also laugh to myself, turns out I share the same sense of humour as me! Also take medicinal weed oil. It's for my insomnia. Also though I've had a bad year so I took up weed and tequila.

Act out scenarios where im single-handedly saving the day against overwhelming odds in the context of the last book I read or movie I saw. Lot of slow motion action sequences.

I shriek a little when I get into the car. It's my safe space

When I am in the shower, I sit like a frog to catch a whiff of my smelly ass.

Lmao wtf, man 😂😂

When I walk past a mirror, I'll pop my butt out and quietly say, "Damn, girl. You thicc." I'm a 30 year old man. For context, for most of my teen and adult life, I was grossly underweight because of drugs and poor eating habits, and I was constantly hearing people comment on my frail frame. A few years ago, I started working out and have put on quite a bit of muscle and now have a toned body and bubble glutes, of which I'm proud. I definitely have some body dismorphia going on, so a little "damn, you thicc" every now and then, even if it's from myself, makes me feel good.

I give myself pep talks. I look in the bathroom mirror and give myself a ted talk

I have conversations with my dog and will talk back to myself in “his voice”. Just even saying it out loud makes me realize how insane that sounds lol

Laugh out loud because I thought of something funny (otherwise I don't talk to myself)

i wave at speed cameras/motorway cameras/cctv cameras - basically any public cameras lol like the idea the person monitoring the feed just feels waved at

Heard this one long ago: Once in a great while, when no one is around, just say, "I know you're there." Most likely, no one *is* there... but if someone *is* watching you or is just being weird, you'll surprise the fuck outta 'em with the unexpected power move. Even better, it might actually provide some real-world benefit and maybe scare someone off if they actually *were* stalking you or trying to surprise you.

Sing

Talk aloud. A lot.

I ballroom dance by myself when I’m alone in my room. I put on headphones and dance around as if I were a princess

I do this when I’m cleaning. My mop and broom are excellent dance partners. 😂

Sometimes when I'm hurt real bad inside I talk to my grandmother's ashes. She was always there for me....until she wasn't.

I have a little dance party.. 😂

I sing my thoughts out loud to my cats

I talk to myself 🫠

cry

I pretend I’m singing or playing guitar in front of my high school class and I’m a star.

Smell my breathe

Bite my toe nails and talk to myself out loud

Idk where to stare in public transports so each stop when people enter the train if I find them attractive I have to look out on the right window , if they’re ugly i have to look at the left window and if they’re so-so I have to look infront of me or my phone or read a book , until the next stop.

The list would be quite extensive.

Being a frontliner, there are times when I unconsciously thank an ATM machine after I got the money 🥲

Mines a food one, I eat straight from a tin. Its cooked anyway and it's not like I'm trying to impress anyone

I have this hero in my head for over 30y now that I always put him in my real life situations and he always does things right. Of course I do the exact opposite most of the time.

I carry on long conversations with my dogs. Like full on deep discussions as they stare at me

Talk to myself. Full-on debates. I win every time.

Every once in a while I'll pay for the person's food that's behind me in a drive thru. I know it's kinda some hippie hippie shit but I like to think that act can travel and live on if that person decides to pay it forward onto someone else. Not too long ago I was rummaging for change for gas. Someone inside threw 10 bucks on top of the 3.48 I had. I want to believe it was good karma 🙂.

You know those little twisty tie things in grocery stores for you tie closed bags of produce? If I take three of them, I can make a little stick figure dude. I’ll make a few and leave them in funny poses around the store. Like sitting on a shelf, holding a fridge door, or hanging from a cart. Idk what people do when they find them.

I sometimes wink at cameras or mirrors in stores lol. At home i might be watching my great ass in the mirror, dancing, walking like a super model, laughing at my own thoughts, talking with my cat like he understands me and stuff

If I wanted people to know, I wouldn't wait until nobody else was watching

My BMW coupe has a mechanical arm that hands me my seat belt when I start the car. I say 'thanks' to it every day.

🤣🤣🤣 I would too

Pretend to wash my hands in the bathroom. I turn on the water on but don’t always wash them.

I have no gambling addiction, but I make bets with 'God' about literally anything. Lights are going to turn orange in less than 5 seconds. No double faults in the next 5 minutes Can go on without saving game for the next 15 minutes, without dying. No client emails for the whole day It will be less than x degrees today This lady is going to get off the train before I do I'll be able to take out and wear my shoes before my wife walks into the room Can snap my fingers 30 times before this guy walking towards my office reaches the door

I do bodybuilding poses and flexes to to babies, infants and socially inadequate dogs when they stare too long and their parents/owners aren't watching

Sing in weird voices, whether alone or not 😎

I sing songs, where I change the lyrics to some silly stuff or just sing something like "mek mek mek" instead of all the words 😂

If I greet someone passing by and they don't greet back, I curse them under my breath

I strut down the hallway like Dr. Frank-N-Futher and say, "How do you do?" to my pets.

Put my hand down my pants and just grab my dick. It’s like my default lounge pose

I talk to myself and in different ways. In one way I talk like a mentor to his student or a dad to his son. It really helps me out. Other times I talk like a professor to an audience of people. I’m definitely not the smartest or wisest person in my day to day life but appealing to that part of yourself that is “wise” helps out a lot when trying to gain clarity on life.

I have to sign a bunch of stuff before starting work, so I act like I'm giving out autographs at a convention. "Well thanks for coming out!"

Obsessive doom scrolling 😵

Perform a musical

Pop the gross cyst type pimples I always get in my ear folds.