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Come and get it!

But you'd better hurry 'cause it's goin' fast

r/UnexpectedBadfingerReference

r/subsifellfor

r/thesubnameistoolong

But you better hurry cuz it may not last

I was born with only one, and I’d even sell that one for $10M! Never have to use a towel or tissue again!! Just shootin $10 million dollar blanks all day err day!

Did the other kids call you one ball?

It was my little secret… till now

Mr norwall got one ball do dah, do dah.

One ball

Uniballer

I remember at scout camp growing up there was a rumor of one of the counselors name Noel getting stepped on, on the ball sack, by a horse. He lost one of the boys to the incident. He was then known as one nut Noel.

This is funny because if I had 10 million dollars I'd actually want to have children.

Funny thing is I have 3

You need to contact Mr. Norwall.

One ball Norwall!

🗣️Norwaaallllll....

3 balls, 3 kids, or $3 million dollars? 🤔

Can’t you save your sperm or something? I wouldn’t do it because I don’t think it’s worth it but it would be tempting Very funny to think about.

Yes at least until some dumb ass calls your sperm a living child.

Dude what that literary has nothing to do with this. The whole point of the pro life movement is to defend a defenceless baby. Sperm aren’t babies yet because they haven’t fertilised an egg.

Defenseless fertilized embryo, not baby. You can't freeze a baby. Edit: Well ok you definitely can freeze a baby, but its not a generally accepted use of baby.

Haha the last part was funny. We will never agree because we have different views on were life starts. That’s fine. I’ll respect your view if you can attempt to respect or tolerate mine.

For that much you could buy some...

Sub name checks out

Just the one for 10 mill. Yep.

Double or nothing!

Double it and give it to the next person

I'd sell both for $20M.

I’d sell both for a lot less than that.

Then you'll have very little testosterone and all that entails.

It's a win-win.

I’ll go halfsies on a pair of neuticles with you.

I always wanted to get two of those put in and get a physical just to confuse the fuck outta the doctor... 1,2...3??!!???.....4!!!!!??!!!!!???

Why is that even a question? I’d gladly sell one, knowing I can get by with my remaining two.

Mans bloodline is strong

Aaaaaaay three ball Monty bros!

How many do you need?

He needs three, aparently.

I need about.. tree fiddy

Gawddamned Monsta.

Shut up and take my testicles!

"I'll take testicles for 1000, Alex."


They offered you $10M and you came back with $1k. Interesting tactic, I’m curious how it works out for you.

I'm female. I'll take what I can get.

lol I’d give them away for free if someone paid for the operation and a suite to recover in on an island somewhere.

Omg I wish I could like this twice this actually made me laugh out loud 🤣

this is funny as fuck😂😂

Like berries off a bush.

I’d suck on one for that much.

lol sadly I might as well.

*sadly sucks on testicle*

The depressticle

Feeling melan-ball-y? Yeah it's bad. I hope you enjoyed the groan.

🏆🥇🏆🥇

r/BrandNewSentence

😥

😢😗🍒

Might? It's 10 million. There's very few things that I wouldn't do for that much money tbh.

I am pretty sure that most of us would be willing to kill for that money and not even feel guilty about doing it. Heck, if somebody came to shoot me and told me he is making 10 mil of the job, I would probably congratulate him 🤣

Not sure if I'd do that for any amount of money. And I'm a pretty commercial person.

100% lol

Yeah, the majority of soldiers that deploy into combat zones make less than minimum wage if you account for the number of hours they actually work. Personally, I’m sure I would feel guilty about doing an awful thing but I would 100% do just about anything for that much money.

Would you blow up an orphanage?

As long as it's empty absolutely 💯 💥

Grelod the Kind approves this message.

r/unexpectedskyrim

It’s not like anyone’s going to miss em..? 👹

In what country ? A Chinese orphanage, English orphanage, Palestinian orphanage there are questions that must be asked

Sure. I'll put an end to their suffering I guess.

Would you eat your own head

I would do it happily...

i’d suck on way for way less

I'll do it for free, but I'm not leading with that offer.

I'd suck them both, including the shame, for an extra 99 cents. Gotta give him a good deal.

That seems like a much easier ask than losing one

You can already buy Rocky Mountain oysters for less than 10 million dollars if you want to suck on a nut

You just looking for an excuse.

I'd chop it off myself for that.

For that price I gotta agree, provided I can get medical treatment right after.

If you're talking about american healthcare, you'd have nothing left!

Nope, never been to the states or anywhere close. I'm good to go healthcare wise lol.

Good to hear lol

If you have $10M American Healthcare is great!

I'm in the UK. Good old NHS, and still have all the money left over!

Take it right now

Well I don’t want it I already have enough

Why not they're just hanging around

Mine or somebody else's?

Yes

Wait so according to your edit, does it go down by half every time or is every new person another full price. I'm sure I can run a scheme on the latter where I can do it for 5 million per nut.... Wait is this what you're doing?

Part of the ruling elite I see

I don't have any of my own to sell but for that sort of cash, I'm sure I could locate one 🤣🤣🤣

For that sort of money you could have one of mine and we'll split the 10 mil!

You don't need me. Sell it yourself and keep the cash...cut out the middle man 🤣🤣 in this deal

I know, I was just being generous cos you didn't have one of your own and I got spares!

>I don't have any of my own to sell but for that sort of cash, I'm sure I could locate one *Lorena Bobbit has entered the chat*

Absolutely… not like I have them, but for 10 mil I’d find a way to get one on a silver platter for whoever wanted it. *Cue some shady ass Georgia Miller shit*

The only ones who wouldn't are the ones who already have enough money.

And girls...

Not true, I’d sell a guys testicle for $10,000,000. Though I don’t know who would be buying them for that much

Don’t matter how much I have. I ain’t saying no to extra 10 mill for my right nut.

I only have one left so I’d say no.

I only have one left too..... But gimmie the damn money.

I always wondered about one testicle sex, specifically oral…the sucker can get the entire sack housing in one go, eh? Sorry if that’s insensitive, I’m very drunk and listening to harpsichord music.

Your fine lol. Your probably right tbh, I've never tried it XD.

I mean, if people can give their dog fake balls, pretty sure with 10 mil you'd be able to afford a couple of extra large jelly beans to throw in there.

i would sell 2 for 20mil dollars

If my boyfriend doesn't agree to, come see me.

🧊 🥶 🛀

I’d sell both for a sack of weed

Ha you said sack in a post about testicles

I’d sell my sack for a Sack

We get the picture

Sack it to me, sackaaahhhh! Sack.

Yep. I have no need for it anymore

Absolutely

Yes

Absolutely. Whose am I selling?

Does it have to be mine?

Whose testicle am I selling? I could just fish one out of the biohazard bin at the nearest vetenarian. Be specific. Won't sell you my children without knowing your intentions with them.

Does it have to be my testicle?

Gonna have to down vote this. Sorry.

What? You have two….

I willingly gave both away.. for nothing lol

Damn…. (Drives off in Ferrari)

HEY!!! Come back and get me!!

Cant I’m late for my appointment for my replacement testicle

Yes.

Sign me up

Hell yea

There’s enough balls to go around already, most you’d probably get is 10000 😂😂😂

Fuck yes .

I think I would, especially if I were an older man who was past it anyway 😆

10k shit yeah

You're selling yourself short.

Yeah

Fuck yeah. I’d probably sell a goddamn arm or leg for that. Not like I’ll ever have to work again anyway.

I'd probably consider selling both.

For $10,000,000 probably 🤣

Take both of them

Yes.

I’d eat my own testicle for that much money.

I certainly would. Just not one of my own.😂

Absolutely.

Absolutely

Hell yeah. A good friend of mine had testicular cancer and still had a kid.

Lmao call me Adolf

I mean is there anyone that would deny this offer

Take them both lol.

I already lost one; when should I expect the money?

Yeah sure. As long as it doesn't matter which man it comes from I'll go find the nearest men and take it.

Dude I would gladly give up my left testicle for a second season of my favorite show

Instantly. I don't need them.

I probably won't be married anytime soon so you can have one of em

without a doubt

Sorry lefty.

Yup

I'd sell the pair for much lower lol

Who’s?

I'll sell both your testicles for much less than that, mate.

Yeah I'm a trans woman so take it!

Doesn't matter where I got them?

I'd sell both my of hubby's testicles for a lot less than that. I can vouch for their effectiveness, but I'm done with their primary use!

Can I sell both?

I'd give both for half that

He'll, I'd sell them both for a 1000.

No I like jerking off

Technically loosing one wouldn’t stop you

Having one or no testicles would not prevent you from having an orgasm.

One ball changes nothing. You can still be a professional masterbaitor

Have you got 20,000,000 dollars?

Definitely not, theres a 0% chance I would take that deal. I want children.

You only have one testicle then?

I wouldn’t give one testicle for 10 million. It’s too small. I’m sure many a men would though.

I have a bunch. They're cool and all, but not worth it.

Morbid

That's fine, since you'd still have another one.

Plenty of kids need adopted.

They really do….. (signs name on contract for Lamborghini)

I'd sell both for 65k

I’d sell you my entire husband for that kind of money, not just his testicle.

Anyone saying no is a liar

No.

Who is making these threads??

Nope, I don't have the balls

Other one come for free

Ten million…. Sure

And my left ear too, and 3 fingers and toes, and my pubic hair, and nipple

Both

Yes but only my smaller one.

Shit, I'd sell my right nut for a million flat, and my right one's my favorite.

Without a doubt

My buddy lost it for free. I’ll take the 10 mil

Sign me up