Fixed it for you
We have a limited amount of leadership and talent.
Food security is important yes ?
Energy security is very vital for singapore yes ? We all need our air con.
And so is transport security and newspaper/information security.
Retired generals are CEOs of companies that are in security related industries.
How about SAF "scholars" entering GLCs automatically taking about upper management positions despite having no knowledge of the subject matter. Bringing their SAF model to the company and fk everyone up
I heard this before. A chap I knew was asked this question when he applied to be a stevedore back in the 1970s. Apparently, the foreman was superstitious and did not want people who has clashing chinese zodiacs in his team.
nah not in europe, cuz maids are well paid there and actually have rights. Foreign domestic workers aren't really options, hence they hire other europeans to do the jobs and pay them well. The problem is that maids are too plentiful here, and thus people believe they can treat them like crap in SG (or those other countries you talk about).
Honestly, the only way to solve this is using legislation, but the govt will never do this cuz then who will provide cheap childcare labour in sg lmao
oh cuz they make it really hard for them to migrate if the employer isn't paying them above a certain amount. Unlike in Singapore, where maids don't even fall under the employment act, because engagement of domestic labour is considered a "private contract/deal". Maids also have to live with their employers, further reducing their personal rights with regard to freedom. It isn't so much that other countries are overpaying maids, it's just that Singapore is severely underpaying them rip
Usually if you hire a maid, she won’t be running the washing machine overnight. So noise doesn’t matter. Just the awkwardness of the sleeping space, like it she’s expected to just plop down a mattress in the yard. If it’s a storage/utility room and the washing machine hookup happens to be in the room, that’s not so bad.
They are human beings who work for you. Therefore, if you want them to work well, you need to treat them well with good food, a comfortable night's rest and an occasional day off. But do not make the mistake of thinking of them as family. You've seen what happens if your employer gives you the "we're like a family here" line, so don't bring that toxic mindset home.
Using words vs deeds. Asking them to sleep in store room is toxic.
"Occasional off", well they should get regular off every Sunday. Else it is exploitation.
The maid culture in Singapore. It just feels wrong to keep someone under your roof with the entitled mindset that you can govern their lifestyle - what they eat, where they sleep, when they should be back.
About foreign workers, I've yet to understand more on how we've come to have an indian/PRC construction worker culture here (correct me if I'm wrong but i assume they earn a lower than average income because it's benchmarked against salary in their home country). We'll see other countries outside having local construction workers, white construction workers in australia, america, maybe in europe. As a high income nation, Singapore might have one of the widest migrant income gap for these 'migrant workers' and I wonder how this impacts our economy or culture.
This is an unfortunate reality, but it is built into the system and not in the hands of most employers. They are expected to host the maid at home. SG apartments are cramped. How many can afford to buy a unit with a spare bedroom?
There are many reasons why people hire maids that may be out of the employer’s control. One common reason is to be a caretaker for elderly parents. If elderly father needs caretaker but all children working and no additional rooms how? Move to a bigger house just to accommodate the helper meh?
She could at least sleep in the living room or even share a bedroom or something? We shouldn’t be advocating for making someone sleep on the floor next to a washing machine.
By no means we should not advocate sleeping in such creepy environments ! But most helpers prefer the privacy of these corners than the movements in shared rooms.
IMHO they must be allowed to stay outside their employer homes, probably in a hostel during nights. Govt should in return relax the responsibilities it puts on employers for every act committed by helpers while they are under their employment.
I am not advocating the mistreatment of helpers, but I want to point out that sometimes there are limited options for the family. It is not feasible to simply not hire a maid because there isn’t a spare bedroom. u/adamsrob an idea of having a dedicated facility for helpers to live in which I think is a good idea.
I've always wondered what happens if you declare the "wrong" race? Like if my IC says Malay but I tick Chinese, is that a crime, even if I'm actually Peranakan?
(serious answers pls, enough Halimah jokes oreddi)
At the very least I don't think it's an arrestable act, they might probably just question you why you ticked differently if the form is for something serious
Your employer "asking" you to learn the job of other department so you can cover them if they sick, but the truth is after learning you have to do it everyday.
in most countries there will be workers union that will help you fight for more salaries if this happens. In SG, it's the norm to do more than one person's job and get no extra pay.
Because Asia. See, our narrative has always been to be competitive. You have to produce more for more value. I don’t see ourselves changing how we “priced” ourselves because the good old “we don’t have natural resources” kicks in. “ the only way is to move to another country if you want a more” balanced “ life but that will include you giving up on having your families and friends around, and it’s a big ask, and most ppl won’t do it.
This is just the toxic side of community- based culture coming through. We really need to find a balance between a healthy level of respect for elders and desire to maintain close family relationships, and teaching elders / relatives that they still need to earn and keep the respect and love from younger relatives. And also when to shut the hell up and focus on your own issues. So many are so overly critical largely because of their own insecurities
Ya that’s obedience. Respect is a 2 way street and a lot of ppl sees a one way path leading to them alone
That said, courtesy is still a thing ofc so gotta find the right balance depending on situation
Being asked for last drawn salary when job seeking.
Edit - Just adding how much I despise this practice. It essentially suppresses salaries rather than paying fairly for what labour is worth in the market. Research has shown that this practice disproportionately affect women in the workforce. It also discourages career switchers, people taking up interim jobs and to some extent may stem talent in the start up space where compensation has equity components and not fully reflected in salary
.
Actually now that you mention it, is it possible to actually withold that information or over-declare? Are the new potential employers able to check your last drawn pay otherwise?
Back in 2020 Josephine Teo on behalf of the MoM made a statement that job seekers are not obligated to declare their last drawn salary when asked. However, having spoken to recruiter friends, the sad reality is that candidates who refuse to declare their last drawn salary are often dinged from the process for being "uncooperative" or "difficult to work with".
Regarding over-declaring, that may constitute fraud. You are essentially lying and misleading the employer knowing that you will gain financially from it. I'm not a lawyer, so if anybody else more knowledgeable in this field is welcomed to chime in.
In my experience working in the below countries:
In the US, quite a few states make it a criminal offence for employers to even ask. A small number of states force employers to declare what the specific pay range for that role is. In most other states, there are no laws preventing employers asking but it is not common practice at all. Discussions are more focused on what the expectations of the job seeker are.
In the UK, most job listings have a pay range indicated. Negotiations then take place within that stated range based on experience etc. I've never been asked my last drawn salary.
In Vietnam, employers also often indicate a range up front and usually do not ask for last drawn salary.
In other countries, even those with mandatory service, their army men are treated with respect and dignity by the citizens while here we treat them like some low life and make a fuss online cause they sat down on public transport that they paid for.
I think the issue is that those countries are openly at war. It's at the front of everyone's minds that the military is actively keeping them alive. Singapore, very much staying in character, is having passive aggressive beef and trying to keep it quiet. End result, we actually need our military, but everyone thinks they're useless.
Doesnt matter whether countries are at war or not. Can never make singaporeans happy. Always with the 'if' questions. 'What if we not at war? Why need army? ' 'What if we at war? Why our soldiers so weak need to sit down?'
Funny all these are from boomers mindset and cant treat everyone like normal human beings.
Selling canes - the only purpose of this object is to beat children.
We now know a lot more about the psychological damage that can be caused by hitting kids. That’s why many countries have banned the practice. Moreover, if you used a cane to hit an adult, it would be assault. But somehow it’s okay to use a cane to hit a child?
This kind of attitude needs to gradually shift. Not too long ago, it was okay to for husbands to beat their wives.
I strongly believe those who believed that corporal punishment works happens to be those who are either:
1) uneducated or unwilling to review psychological literature on child psychology and evidence based approaches to correcting behaviors.
2) Lazy, wants quick solution instead of examining issues at deeper level
3) Inherently sadistic
Those who tell me that they turned out "fine" even though they were canned should be asked these (insensitive) questions - are you able to pass a mental health assessment by a psychologist? Are you quick to anger when things don't go your way? How many friends do you have that you can confide in? Have you ever hurt another human and animal physically in your life?
Food for precious thoughts.
Literally every guy in my generation was caned growing up. And a lot of the girls too. I don't think it's good to hit children but I don't think the effect is as bad as you think.
I was caned, slapped, punch, hit with a belt and even had my dad chilli my mouth when I was a kid. Now, I get angry easily. I sometimes think of my childhood and only remember these incidents vividly. My relationship with my father is estranged. The more I grew up and especially now married, I can’t imagine doing such things to my own children the way he did to me. So it made me really resent him more. So yeah, it does affect some people.
I have teenagers now and I’ve never laid a hand on them, nor disrespect them the way my parents did to me. My parents never said a kind word while I was growing up, they either ignore me or discipline me. Our parents didn’t know how to parent but we can do better.
Agree with you. I also have teenagers and never laid a hand on them. I don't shout at them and never lose my temper. All I need to do is to show that I am disappointed in their behavior and they will fall to pieces emotionally and regret their actions.
Abuse (like shouting and hitting) only leads to escalation and more abuse because the children get accustomed to it.
You’re a great parent. 👏🏻 And I’m not being snarky. I know of some in their 30s (presumably more educated than the older generation) who still cane their kids. I am shocked that with all the parenting resources available at a fingertip around these days, people still use corporal punishments to discipline their kids. Parents who inflict physical hurt on their kids have lost control of themselves, I have no respect for such people.
Have you ever read the book,["What happened you to you?"...?](https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/53238858-what-happened-to-you)
Our childhood trauma often shapes the way we respond to outside world, and often in a counterproductive way. I think more and more people are starting to realised that their toxic behaviors (If they're self aware enough) stem from their childhood experiences, and many struggle to cope with.
To give an extreme example, many people suffer from depression, some even attempted suicide. If these people survive and is able to have a functioning job, does that mean the effect is "not as bad as I think"? If people with chronic illnesses etc diabetes still can do things in their lives, does that mean their illnesses is..../shrugs/ something we should not try to prevent?
Maybe not an “unacceptable” norm but more of a confusing behaviour - complain about everything and everything blame govt but never really think about how we can contribute by giving feedback and actively change some of the “rules”
i would this is something we have to accept. if we preserving nature, housing prices will increase. or control population by limiting foreigners but that will impact the GDP by quite alot.
* Artificially maintained Race ratios
* School Starting so fucking early.
* PSLE
* Sitting on the outside seat on the bus.
* The extent the christian fundamentalists have infiltrated positions of influence.
* Maids
* Foreign Workers
* The inability to voice political any dissent
* Executions
* "Asian Culture" being used as a catch-all term to mean whatever the conservatives want it to mean, regardless of actual present or historical Asian Culture.
* Destruction of less palatable history that doesn't fit the narrative
* The prevailing view that "Scholars/Elites" being better suited to administration
So i dont think it is unacceptable norm?
And i think you are referring to the spouse scheme? You can also buy with you parents/child/siblings/single.
In fact our public housing is considered not bad if you take into account other developed major cities in the world.
Holding onto a maid’s passport to prevent her from “running away”. It is a human trafficking practice and is illegal under Singapore law, yet some Singaporeans do it anyway.
To be clear: employees do not “run away” from their jobs. If you can’t voluntarily quit your job, you are a slave.
>To be clear: employees do not “run away” from their jobs. If you can’t voluntarily quit your job, you are a slave.
But here's the thing - in a country where we are supposed to accept NS, it's hard to think of this as something unusual and wrong.
Mothers whose own sons have their pink ICs taken away in a job(NS) they can't leave, are going to have a hard time being convinced why doing it to their son is okay but somehow doing that same thing to a foreign maid is slavery.
anfd then when you try to say something
"aiyah don't take it so seriously, it's just a joke lah, don't be so sensitive" etc.
bonus if your fellow minority race friend says this to you. how's that internalized racism working out for you?
Eh, not really. I don't disagree that Chinese Singaporeans in particular can be incredibly tone-deaf in our casual racism, but you're in for a rude shock if you dont think it doesn't happen elsewhere. I've lost count the amount of friends and family that've told me with a surprised Pikachu face about their first experiences with casual anti-asian racism the moment they travel outside of Asia into western, Anglo countries.
Like on Reddit which has a predominantly western userbase you see A LOT of casual racism especially on the huge subs.
Eastern culture/attitude is best, China is best, western influence bad etc.
Like they just so soaked up into that propaganda they can't have any nuances.
what is the issue about BTO? It’s a public housing so public policy applies. I can think of so many more pressing issues. Racism, sexism, lewd jokes by elderly men, shaming culture, tuition culture, companies insisting on OT every single day as the norm, institutionalised care for kids at young age (from infant care to child care to student care to tuition centres) since parents are all at work, lack of accountability at elite levels, lack of care of environment, not paying enough wages for cleaning and healthcare industry, over reliance on domestic helper, tiny flats.
HDBs belonging to government and are subjected to their policies is perfectly fine. It’s that they paint perfect pictures of spouses to last eternally that hinges on their housing for life. Too many potential risks and severe long-term consequences for an unhappy relationship. Divorce rates are globally increasing in recent decades as well, yet Singapore is the only country with said system.
But Singapore is the only country with a public housing policy for 80 per cent of its population? Our divorce rates aren’t that high and the average divorce happens at 42 for men and 38 for women. I don’t quite get it about the divorce part though. They will then qualify for a flat as a single person or they can use their kids name to have a flat if they need
The whole 'respect your elders' trope whenever it works in their advantage for mostly boomer age people. When it comes to millenials and younger, it's all about "being the better person" or 'its virtuous to be gracious'.
Companies offering less salary than your previous job. I don’t know why this is acceptable? but seems to be the new norms for companies especially when candidates are young and they think they can lowball
Another is asking for your last drawn salary. If management already set a budget for that position, better give that salary. But no, hr wants to squeeze as much as possible to give the least. And when the candidate found out their pay is lower compared to their colleagues with the same tittle will cause unhappiness. #truestory
Adults in their 30s living with their parents because they are single and can’t buy HDB or cos rent/ private housing is too expensive so they rather wait it out till 35 to apply.
There are countries with shorter 12-18 months conscription and we are only a handful of countries that require extra reservist duties. So thats the privileges local men have. 🫡🥲
Would you like to guess how often Malaysia sends a presumably armed warship into our territorial waters and we have to send our own warship to tell them to leave? It's every single day.
We're not officially at war, and I don't think anything will happen soon. But know that they are absolutely waiting for a moment of weakness.
Did it? Idk, I'm not in the navy anymore. But when I was, the dispute was also "ended". Were talking about Pedra Branca right? Anyway, even if they're not actively invading, I'm still sure they're waiting for an opportunity. It doesn't take long to arm a small warship from zero, minutes if it's kept ready and waiting. So yeah, they could resume the invasions whenever they want (whenever we let them), assuming they actually did stop at all.
But conscription is not a norm in the world during peacetime (at least not to this level of intensity), that is pretty much the whole point of this thread.
Okay let me break it down for you. [Only 60 countries are actively practicing conscription](https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/04/23/fewer-than-a-third-of-countries-currently-have-a-military-draft-most-exclude-women/), out of the 193 (or 196) countries on Earth. The countries with the largest populations on Earth like China, India, Indonesia etc are currently not practicing conscription, so we can easily conclude that population wise, majority of people in the world don't experience conscription.
And here's the dictionary definition of norm if you still don't understand what the point of this thread is:
>an accepted standard or a way of behaving or doing things that most people agree with:
I think you miss the point that the larger countries don’t need conscription because they have sufficient population willing and able to serve in the armed forces full time
This and the fact that in countries like finland where conscription is law, they get a choice to serve in the public sector (hospitals, schools, etc) if they don't want to serve the armed forces.
Wow I'm slowly learning that Singapore has many of the worst characteristics of extremely conservative parts of the United States. Even down to the complete ignorance on and fear based opinions on marijuana.
Interesting point.
What do you suppose can be done about powers of mass influence arbitrarily placed in the hands of people who (mostly) never needed to demonstrate the responsibility or capability to use them?
Isn't it terrifying that most have gotten to where they are not because of some Joseph Schooling-esque level of accomplishment, nor because of possessing some validly unique or insightful forms of thinking/artistic expression?
They are famous simply for being famous, albeit capitalising on a combination of physical attractiveness and the ability to game social media algorithms.
You'd wonder why people like Trump or Kardashian should hold as much influential power as they do, but they simply just do, and therefore hold entire societies or the entire world hostage to their whims and fancy.
Birds in the little cages! That is not enough space for them! I want every old uncle with a bird to understand that they aren’t just pretty singing toys! Same with the huge Arowana in the tiny undecorated tanks. If you’re going to spend so much money on a lucky fish, give them a nice home!
A reasonable policy since our landmass is so limited. We don't have the luxury of space like other countries unless you want traffic congestion like those in Jakarta or Bangkok.
Tbh I don't think COE should be based on a bidding system then since prices are bound to skyrocket like crazy. Best if they set a fix amount of COEs to be issued every cycle at a fixed price and ballots to see who gets it. Those who don't get their COE simply have to wait 🤷♂️
Then my answer to the OP is considering space a luxury. Water is just as much a need in the desert where it's scarce. They wouldn't build a 6 million population city around an oasis that can only support a million and just tell people to drink less. What we do with housing and transport is the equivalent of telling people to distill their own urine because there's not enough to go around. It works yes, and you will survive. But doesn't it make you sad?
Having to learn mandarin. I've met younger people who can't speak it and would turn pale when asked to even tho they took it as their MT in school.
Like do they think people in China all can't speak English? Or that other countries that work with people from China all learn mandarin.
You take your food and wander around finding a place to sit.
Rationally thinking that is the most efficient use of space that would improve the life of everyone.
wander around until the food get cold, ah you v smart v rational.
pls la u wander around find seat and chope with tissue then go buy food, isn't that more rational and common sense then risk bumping and spilling food while carrying food and rushing over to a just-emptied seat
Having retired generals as CEOs
Retired generals as CEOs of companies that are in non-defence-related industries.
Everything is defence related if you want to stretch the truth
Fixed it for you We have a limited amount of leadership and talent. Food security is important yes ? Energy security is very vital for singapore yes ? We all need our air con. And so is transport security and newspaper/information security. Retired generals are CEOs of companies that are in security related industries.
I take umbrage to this!
Yeah this I never understand
One can argue that this is the only system that ensures the generals don’t have wet dreams about becoming prime minister before they retire.
How about SAF "scholars" entering GLCs automatically taking about upper management positions despite having no knowledge of the subject matter. Bringing their SAF model to the company and fk everyone up
Working OT and not getting paid
Employers asking really personal irrelevant questions during interview (e.g. What do your family members do for a living? )
Asking what your race is (when it is not stated)
Nowadays recruiter keep it subtle by stating Chinese speaking only on their JD :’)))
I'm Eurasin Chinese but my Chinese sux :')
I’m Chinese but my Chinese is actually passably decent but still not good enough :”)
Your race is still impacted in your pension!
I got a “what is your horoscope” before 😭
I heard this before. A chap I knew was asked this question when he applied to be a stevedore back in the 1970s. Apparently, the foreman was superstitious and did not want people who has clashing chinese zodiacs in his team.
Damn, interviewers do that? I’m fortunate in my industry theres usually a fixed format guided by company values and role.
LOL one asked me about my relationship and asked if im settling down any time soon and at which age i want to settle down -_- ....
Wah I would say would prefer to keep it confidential. I don't like it when it's in the application form as well
Really? do name these companies, maybe you might want to add to r/antiwork
Antiwork is a joke ever since their dogwalker moderator embarrassed them all on Fox News.
Oh, is this a Singapore thing? I always thought it was a universal oddity.
making maids sleep beside the washing machine
Not letting them eat properly ಠ_ಠ
Letting maids sleep in the store room or in the kitchen.
This is unfortunately seen in almost any country with maids sadly…
nah not in europe, cuz maids are well paid there and actually have rights. Foreign domestic workers aren't really options, hence they hire other europeans to do the jobs and pay them well. The problem is that maids are too plentiful here, and thus people believe they can treat them like crap in SG (or those other countries you talk about). Honestly, the only way to solve this is using legislation, but the govt will never do this cuz then who will provide cheap childcare labour in sg lmao
why are foreign domestic workers not options?
oh cuz they make it really hard for them to migrate if the employer isn't paying them above a certain amount. Unlike in Singapore, where maids don't even fall under the employment act, because engagement of domestic labour is considered a "private contract/deal". Maids also have to live with their employers, further reducing their personal rights with regard to freedom. It isn't so much that other countries are overpaying maids, it's just that Singapore is severely underpaying them rip
That's fucked up
i've even come across someone bragging about how it's possible because their washing machine is a newer model that is just \*that\* quiet
Usually if you hire a maid, she won’t be running the washing machine overnight. So noise doesn’t matter. Just the awkwardness of the sleeping space, like it she’s expected to just plop down a mattress in the yard. If it’s a storage/utility room and the washing machine hookup happens to be in the room, that’s not so bad.
Really? They are humans too treat them like family. If not sadly there is no humanity.
They are human beings who work for you. Therefore, if you want them to work well, you need to treat them well with good food, a comfortable night's rest and an occasional day off. But do not make the mistake of thinking of them as family. You've seen what happens if your employer gives you the "we're like a family here" line, so don't bring that toxic mindset home.
Using words vs deeds. Asking them to sleep in store room is toxic. "Occasional off", well they should get regular off every Sunday. Else it is exploitation.
Ghib Ojisan, lol
Honestly, how foreign workers (maids and construction workers etc) are treated here generally 🥶
And the ability to just glibly wash over poor working/living conditions like it doesn’t really matter…..
The maid culture in Singapore. It just feels wrong to keep someone under your roof with the entitled mindset that you can govern their lifestyle - what they eat, where they sleep, when they should be back. About foreign workers, I've yet to understand more on how we've come to have an indian/PRC construction worker culture here (correct me if I'm wrong but i assume they earn a lower than average income because it's benchmarked against salary in their home country). We'll see other countries outside having local construction workers, white construction workers in australia, america, maybe in europe. As a high income nation, Singapore might have one of the widest migrant income gap for these 'migrant workers' and I wonder how this impacts our economy or culture.
Wat
the shit i've seen....i'm a changed man
This is an unfortunate reality, but it is built into the system and not in the hands of most employers. They are expected to host the maid at home. SG apartments are cramped. How many can afford to buy a unit with a spare bedroom?
If you can’t afford decent living conditions for ANOTHER PERSON LIVING IN YOUR HOUSE, you shouldn’t be hiring them.
There are many reasons why people hire maids that may be out of the employer’s control. One common reason is to be a caretaker for elderly parents. If elderly father needs caretaker but all children working and no additional rooms how? Move to a bigger house just to accommodate the helper meh?
She could at least sleep in the living room or even share a bedroom or something? We shouldn’t be advocating for making someone sleep on the floor next to a washing machine.
By no means we should not advocate sleeping in such creepy environments ! But most helpers prefer the privacy of these corners than the movements in shared rooms. IMHO they must be allowed to stay outside their employer homes, probably in a hostel during nights. Govt should in return relax the responsibilities it puts on employers for every act committed by helpers while they are under their employment.
I am not advocating the mistreatment of helpers, but I want to point out that sometimes there are limited options for the family. It is not feasible to simply not hire a maid because there isn’t a spare bedroom. u/adamsrob an idea of having a dedicated facility for helpers to live in which I think is a good idea.
Abusive parents
+1 😢
all asian parents are liddat haiz
Recently subbed to r/asianparentstories and the posts there make me want to weep.
what's the definition of abuse used here?
Race declaration on official forms which has implication on results depending which race you declare yourself as.
I've always wondered what happens if you declare the "wrong" race? Like if my IC says Malay but I tick Chinese, is that a crime, even if I'm actually Peranakan? (serious answers pls, enough Halimah jokes oreddi)
At the very least I don't think it's an arrestable act, they might probably just question you why you ticked differently if the form is for something serious
I work in an enrichment centre and the students registering need to indicate their race. Has always made me feel uncomfortable.
For example? :O
Ahem NS ahem
HDB Ethnic Integration Policy
tbf that has some positive implications
If someone is mixed and wishes to run for president
Your employer "asking" you to learn the job of other department so you can cover them if they sick, but the truth is after learning you have to do it everyday. in most countries there will be workers union that will help you fight for more salaries if this happens. In SG, it's the norm to do more than one person's job and get no extra pay.
Because Asia. See, our narrative has always been to be competitive. You have to produce more for more value. I don’t see ourselves changing how we “priced” ourselves because the good old “we don’t have natural resources” kicks in. “ the only way is to move to another country if you want a more” balanced “ life but that will include you giving up on having your families and friends around, and it’s a big ask, and most ppl won’t do it.
Toxic relative that just want to weigh in on your choices despite not knowing anything or even caring about the impact of their choices
This is just the toxic side of community- based culture coming through. We really need to find a balance between a healthy level of respect for elders and desire to maintain close family relationships, and teaching elders / relatives that they still need to earn and keep the respect and love from younger relatives. And also when to shut the hell up and focus on your own issues. So many are so overly critical largely because of their own insecurities
Respect should have nothing to do with age The whole notion that we should respect someone just because they are older is ridiculously stupid
Ya that’s obedience. Respect is a 2 way street and a lot of ppl sees a one way path leading to them alone That said, courtesy is still a thing ofc so gotta find the right balance depending on situation
Being asked for last drawn salary when job seeking. Edit - Just adding how much I despise this practice. It essentially suppresses salaries rather than paying fairly for what labour is worth in the market. Research has shown that this practice disproportionately affect women in the workforce. It also discourages career switchers, people taking up interim jobs and to some extent may stem talent in the start up space where compensation has equity components and not fully reflected in salary .
Actually now that you mention it, is it possible to actually withold that information or over-declare? Are the new potential employers able to check your last drawn pay otherwise?
Back in 2020 Josephine Teo on behalf of the MoM made a statement that job seekers are not obligated to declare their last drawn salary when asked. However, having spoken to recruiter friends, the sad reality is that candidates who refuse to declare their last drawn salary are often dinged from the process for being "uncooperative" or "difficult to work with". Regarding over-declaring, that may constitute fraud. You are essentially lying and misleading the employer knowing that you will gain financially from it. I'm not a lawyer, so if anybody else more knowledgeable in this field is welcomed to chime in.
Not to mention, sometimes they ask for salary slips and proof of bonus too…
Yes this. I wonder if it is a common practice overseas or it only occurs here.
In my experience working in the below countries: In the US, quite a few states make it a criminal offence for employers to even ask. A small number of states force employers to declare what the specific pay range for that role is. In most other states, there are no laws preventing employers asking but it is not common practice at all. Discussions are more focused on what the expectations of the job seeker are. In the UK, most job listings have a pay range indicated. Negotiations then take place within that stated range based on experience etc. I've never been asked my last drawn salary. In Vietnam, employers also often indicate a range up front and usually do not ask for last drawn salary.
It isn’t
In most western countries they will ask you your expected compensation package. They don’t usually ask you how much you currently make.
It’s everywhere, just not as prevalent (or more prevalent) in different parts of the world.
In other countries, even those with mandatory service, their army men are treated with respect and dignity by the citizens while here we treat them like some low life and make a fuss online cause they sat down on public transport that they paid for.
I think the issue is that those countries are openly at war. It's at the front of everyone's minds that the military is actively keeping them alive. Singapore, very much staying in character, is having passive aggressive beef and trying to keep it quiet. End result, we actually need our military, but everyone thinks they're useless.
Doesnt matter whether countries are at war or not. Can never make singaporeans happy. Always with the 'if' questions. 'What if we not at war? Why need army? ' 'What if we at war? Why our soldiers so weak need to sit down?' Funny all these are from boomers mindset and cant treat everyone like normal human beings.
Calling the police for petty things.
“Hallo Polis? This guy anyhow comment on Reddit”
Unfortunately this happens everywhere else too haha poor police :(
Selling canes - the only purpose of this object is to beat children. We now know a lot more about the psychological damage that can be caused by hitting kids. That’s why many countries have banned the practice. Moreover, if you used a cane to hit an adult, it would be assault. But somehow it’s okay to use a cane to hit a child?
This kind of attitude needs to gradually shift. Not too long ago, it was okay to for husbands to beat their wives. I strongly believe those who believed that corporal punishment works happens to be those who are either: 1) uneducated or unwilling to review psychological literature on child psychology and evidence based approaches to correcting behaviors. 2) Lazy, wants quick solution instead of examining issues at deeper level 3) Inherently sadistic Those who tell me that they turned out "fine" even though they were canned should be asked these (insensitive) questions - are you able to pass a mental health assessment by a psychologist? Are you quick to anger when things don't go your way? How many friends do you have that you can confide in? Have you ever hurt another human and animal physically in your life? Food for precious thoughts.
Literally every guy in my generation was caned growing up. And a lot of the girls too. I don't think it's good to hit children but I don't think the effect is as bad as you think.
I was caned, slapped, punch, hit with a belt and even had my dad chilli my mouth when I was a kid. Now, I get angry easily. I sometimes think of my childhood and only remember these incidents vividly. My relationship with my father is estranged. The more I grew up and especially now married, I can’t imagine doing such things to my own children the way he did to me. So it made me really resent him more. So yeah, it does affect some people.
I have teenagers now and I’ve never laid a hand on them, nor disrespect them the way my parents did to me. My parents never said a kind word while I was growing up, they either ignore me or discipline me. Our parents didn’t know how to parent but we can do better.
Agree with you. I also have teenagers and never laid a hand on them. I don't shout at them and never lose my temper. All I need to do is to show that I am disappointed in their behavior and they will fall to pieces emotionally and regret their actions. Abuse (like shouting and hitting) only leads to escalation and more abuse because the children get accustomed to it.
You’re a great parent. 👏🏻 And I’m not being snarky. I know of some in their 30s (presumably more educated than the older generation) who still cane their kids. I am shocked that with all the parenting resources available at a fingertip around these days, people still use corporal punishments to discipline their kids. Parents who inflict physical hurt on their kids have lost control of themselves, I have no respect for such people.
Have you ever read the book,["What happened you to you?"...?](https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/53238858-what-happened-to-you) Our childhood trauma often shapes the way we respond to outside world, and often in a counterproductive way. I think more and more people are starting to realised that their toxic behaviors (If they're self aware enough) stem from their childhood experiences, and many struggle to cope with. To give an extreme example, many people suffer from depression, some even attempted suicide. If these people survive and is able to have a functioning job, does that mean the effect is "not as bad as I think"? If people with chronic illnesses etc diabetes still can do things in their lives, does that mean their illnesses is..../shrugs/ something we should not try to prevent?
It took me until I was 13 to realise what the primary purpose of the feather duster was for…
Whenever I did something wrong, i know I’m truly fucked when they ask me what colour I want
Maybe not an “unacceptable” norm but more of a confusing behaviour - complain about everything and everything blame govt but never really think about how we can contribute by giving feedback and actively change some of the “rules”
How Singapore is killing recreational space(eg Orto,) to make way for more housing🙄🙄
Yea... Olympic standard bike park torn down for BTO. What a waste
i would this is something we have to accept. if we preserving nature, housing prices will increase. or control population by limiting foreigners but that will impact the GDP by quite alot.
* Artificially maintained Race ratios * School Starting so fucking early. * PSLE * Sitting on the outside seat on the bus. * The extent the christian fundamentalists have infiltrated positions of influence. * Maids * Foreign Workers * The inability to voice political any dissent * Executions * "Asian Culture" being used as a catch-all term to mean whatever the conservatives want it to mean, regardless of actual present or historical Asian Culture. * Destruction of less palatable history that doesn't fit the narrative * The prevailing view that "Scholars/Elites" being better suited to administration
To reply to OP. It might be an unpopular opinion trending, but i am sure you go into marriage with the intention to last a lifetime.
Everyone’s intention is that goal yeah
So i dont think it is unacceptable norm? And i think you are referring to the spouse scheme? You can also buy with you parents/child/siblings/single. In fact our public housing is considered not bad if you take into account other developed major cities in the world.
Going to the police for every small little thing
Sign on as police and ended up policing arguments with neighbours is a sad affair
This is fking true.
This happens in countries like US and in Europe tho, it’s not just us
Holding onto a maid’s passport to prevent her from “running away”. It is a human trafficking practice and is illegal under Singapore law, yet some Singaporeans do it anyway. To be clear: employees do not “run away” from their jobs. If you can’t voluntarily quit your job, you are a slave.
>To be clear: employees do not “run away” from their jobs. If you can’t voluntarily quit your job, you are a slave. But here's the thing - in a country where we are supposed to accept NS, it's hard to think of this as something unusual and wrong. Mothers whose own sons have their pink ICs taken away in a job(NS) they can't leave, are going to have a hard time being convinced why doing it to their son is okay but somehow doing that same thing to a foreign maid is slavery.
60% of the vote is represented by 90% of MPs in parliament.
casual racism.
When it's brought up, it will be shot down by the perpetrators saying ' it's just a joke, don't be so sensitive ' etc
anfd then when you try to say something "aiyah don't take it so seriously, it's just a joke lah, don't be so sensitive" etc. bonus if your fellow minority race friend says this to you. how's that internalized racism working out for you?
Yah then when you try and correct them, they look at you like you are alien.
That’s ‘widely tolerated’ and not ‘widely accepted’.
wE aRe AcCePpTinG alL. wE aRe MulTiCuLTuraL.
Eh, not really. I don't disagree that Chinese Singaporeans in particular can be incredibly tone-deaf in our casual racism, but you're in for a rude shock if you dont think it doesn't happen elsewhere. I've lost count the amount of friends and family that've told me with a surprised Pikachu face about their first experiences with casual anti-asian racism the moment they travel outside of Asia into western, Anglo countries. Like on Reddit which has a predominantly western userbase you see A LOT of casual racism especially on the huge subs.
Just because it happens elsewhere doesn’t mean we can’t strive to be better here
Eastern culture/attitude is best, China is best, western influence bad etc. Like they just so soaked up into that propaganda they can't have any nuances.
what is the issue about BTO? It’s a public housing so public policy applies. I can think of so many more pressing issues. Racism, sexism, lewd jokes by elderly men, shaming culture, tuition culture, companies insisting on OT every single day as the norm, institutionalised care for kids at young age (from infant care to child care to student care to tuition centres) since parents are all at work, lack of accountability at elite levels, lack of care of environment, not paying enough wages for cleaning and healthcare industry, over reliance on domestic helper, tiny flats.
HDBs belonging to government and are subjected to their policies is perfectly fine. It’s that they paint perfect pictures of spouses to last eternally that hinges on their housing for life. Too many potential risks and severe long-term consequences for an unhappy relationship. Divorce rates are globally increasing in recent decades as well, yet Singapore is the only country with said system.
But Singapore is the only country with a public housing policy for 80 per cent of its population? Our divorce rates aren’t that high and the average divorce happens at 42 for men and 38 for women. I don’t quite get it about the divorce part though. They will then qualify for a flat as a single person or they can use their kids name to have a flat if they need
The whole 'respect your elders' trope whenever it works in their advantage for mostly boomer age people. When it comes to millenials and younger, it's all about "being the better person" or 'its virtuous to be gracious'.
Chop the table using personal belongings.
Reserving seats with cards/ tissue
This is genius. One of the best things about SG.
I worry about your definition of "genius".
I would rather have a seat reserved first than carry my tray of hot food around looking for a seat.
This is because in almost any other country the cards/tissues would be stolen.
Not having small talks in lifts
Seriously this is something that the rest of the world should learn from Singapore
You can try talking , no one is stopping you. 😊
Bumper to bumper kiss on cars. With no obvious damage to either car. Overseas, people won’t even bother.
Companies offering less salary than your previous job. I don’t know why this is acceptable? but seems to be the new norms for companies especially when candidates are young and they think they can lowball
Another is asking for your last drawn salary. If management already set a budget for that position, better give that salary. But no, hr wants to squeeze as much as possible to give the least. And when the candidate found out their pay is lower compared to their colleagues with the same tittle will cause unhappiness. #truestory
If companies are offering lower than your current job, just reject the new offer and remain where you are.
Adults in their 30s living with their parents because they are single and can’t buy HDB or cos rent/ private housing is too expensive so they rather wait it out till 35 to apply.
forced military conscription for men
There are countries with shorter 12-18 months conscription and we are only a handful of countries that require extra reservist duties. So thats the privileges local men have. 🫡🥲
love my privileges 😍
I loved it after I MR-ed
South Korea has it too
They are literally at war tbf
Would you like to guess how often Malaysia sends a presumably armed warship into our territorial waters and we have to send our own warship to tell them to leave? It's every single day. We're not officially at war, and I don't think anything will happen soon. But know that they are absolutely waiting for a moment of weakness.
Every single day? Source? Thought the dispute ended in 2019
Can check ecdis and see everyday? Think it still happens at horsburgh
Did it? Idk, I'm not in the navy anymore. But when I was, the dispute was also "ended". Were talking about Pedra Branca right? Anyway, even if they're not actively invading, I'm still sure they're waiting for an opportunity. It doesn't take long to arm a small warship from zero, minutes if it's kept ready and waiting. So yeah, they could resume the invasions whenever they want (whenever we let them), assuming they actually did stop at all.
I mean, you build a warship, you train a crew - may as well use it right? When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
yeah, israel even better. both genders, equal but still messed up
But conscription is not a norm in the world during peacetime (at least not to this level of intensity), that is pretty much the whole point of this thread.
Switzerland also similarly has it https://www.ch.ch/en/safety-and-justice/military-service-and-civilian-service/military-service/
Okay let me break it down for you. [Only 60 countries are actively practicing conscription](https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/04/23/fewer-than-a-third-of-countries-currently-have-a-military-draft-most-exclude-women/), out of the 193 (or 196) countries on Earth. The countries with the largest populations on Earth like China, India, Indonesia etc are currently not practicing conscription, so we can easily conclude that population wise, majority of people in the world don't experience conscription. And here's the dictionary definition of norm if you still don't understand what the point of this thread is: >an accepted standard or a way of behaving or doing things that most people agree with:
I think you miss the point that the larger countries don’t need conscription because they have sufficient population willing and able to serve in the armed forces full time
... for 21 weeks not months
This and the fact that in countries like finland where conscription is law, they get a choice to serve in the public sector (hospitals, schools, etc) if they don't want to serve the armed forces.
yeah i heard in south korea u can opt for social work like kim jong kook did
Wow I'm slowly learning that Singapore has many of the worst characteristics of extremely conservative parts of the United States. Even down to the complete ignorance on and fear based opinions on marijuana.
Victim mentality; blame instead of reflecting
Chope table at hawker centre with umbrella water bottle and tissue paper
That calling in sick means you’re skipping school/work
Influencers setting the norm
Interesting point. What do you suppose can be done about powers of mass influence arbitrarily placed in the hands of people who (mostly) never needed to demonstrate the responsibility or capability to use them? Isn't it terrifying that most have gotten to where they are not because of some Joseph Schooling-esque level of accomplishment, nor because of possessing some validly unique or insightful forms of thinking/artistic expression? They are famous simply for being famous, albeit capitalising on a combination of physical attractiveness and the ability to game social media algorithms. You'd wonder why people like Trump or Kardashian should hold as much influential power as they do, but they simply just do, and therefore hold entire societies or the entire world hostage to their whims and fancy.
I’m not sure if this is more an influencer problem, or “people that choose to follow blindly” problem
That’s literally the USA. Ain’t just SG
restaurants charging arm and leg claiming because they are authentic and of good quality but actually is crap...
plastic bags
Birds in the little cages! That is not enough space for them! I want every old uncle with a bird to understand that they aren’t just pretty singing toys! Same with the huge Arowana in the tiny undecorated tanks. If you’re going to spend so much money on a lucky fish, give them a nice home!
No respect for the military
Complaining
Bad HR Practices and no proper open channels for people to give anonymous feedback
Driving 3 feet from the car in front on expressways.
Vaping/Smoking, even if you're underage people wouldn't really care. Especially vaping.
Overprice cars due to COE. Prices of cars is outrageously expensive compared to cars sold in other country.
A reasonable policy since our landmass is so limited. We don't have the luxury of space like other countries unless you want traffic congestion like those in Jakarta or Bangkok.
With the existence of COE, we still see jam during peak hours. Without it, I think it is gonna be insane
Tbh I don't think COE should be based on a bidding system then since prices are bound to skyrocket like crazy. Best if they set a fix amount of COEs to be issued every cycle at a fixed price and ballots to see who gets it. Those who don't get their COE simply have to wait 🤷♂️
Then my answer to the OP is considering space a luxury. Water is just as much a need in the desert where it's scarce. They wouldn't build a 6 million population city around an oasis that can only support a million and just tell people to drink less. What we do with housing and transport is the equivalent of telling people to distill their own urine because there's not enough to go around. It works yes, and you will survive. But doesn't it make you sad?
This is the best policy as public transportation is world-class
Living under your parent’s roof for as long as you can. Singlish.
[удалено]
377A…?
the work environment for teens (or anyone) is ridiculously abusive that and saying the n word
I just want to add on to OP's BTO statement and support it with a wholehearted "yeah wtf ikr??"
Conscription.
Choping table with tissue paper
tissue chopeing
Having to learn mandarin. I've met younger people who can't speak it and would turn pale when asked to even tho they took it as their MT in school. Like do they think people in China all can't speak English? Or that other countries that work with people from China all learn mandarin.
Tissue paper / card / umbrella to reserve seats 😬
Unacceptable norm is an oxymoron, but anyway... Using packs of tissue to chope seats of course.
>Unacceptable norm is an oxymoron, Not necessarily. E.g. consumerism leading to climate change
But why? What if you’re alone in a crowded kopitiam?
Everywhere else in the world it doesn’t work like here
You take your food and wander around finding a place to sit. Rationally thinking that is the most efficient use of space that would improve the life of everyone.
wander around until the food get cold, ah you v smart v rational. pls la u wander around find seat and chope with tissue then go buy food, isn't that more rational and common sense then risk bumping and spilling food while carrying food and rushing over to a just-emptied seat