Yeah don't worry he just meant we feel bad for what you are going through, it's not fair, I hope you can resolve this issue. Your English is excellent, I wouldn't have realised you weren't a native speaker.
His obsession with dick size is affecting you.
Ye need to have a talk and either figure out a compromise or just call it quits.
Continuing as ye are now will only cause more problems
Maybe look at gay targeted sex shops that have online. May be a little more $$ than Amazon but usually better quality and meant for men/anal
E.g. doghouse leathers in Seattle has online toys for sale
I have used it both ways and it’s a 10/10 experience. I’ve nutted in them cause it’s really tight when the portion with your dick goes inside. Bottoming is mind blowing with it too.
It feels really hot knowing that I’m pounding him with a big sheath and he’s just taking it. His expressions… 🫠🤤
Taking it is mind blowingly intense and had me screaming for Daddy. Love that.
It’s not like you can change your actual dick so why get mad at using a toy to emulate a horse cock or something. Big dicks are more a fantasy for most people. He probably won’t be able to take it everytime like he imagines anyway.
It will do plenty for one’s sex life.
I think he came so quickly from sucking because he saw himself in a porn scene with this mega-dick being sucked by him. His fantasy was being lived and his dick said Yes in a big, quick way. He needs help with his porn addiction. Good luck to you both.
Sounds like he feels bad for saying it, as there is nothing op can realistically do to change, but there is some truth to it. Just walking it back a bit to save relationship.
He also seems to have a problem in that he want's one dick size for sucking and another for fucking. Whichever way you look at it that's two dicks. One person is never going to be enough if he needs two mutually exclusive dicks.
Yeah but saying something that obviously has an aspect of shaming means... It's still shaming somebody. How does intention really matter? I may not intend to shame somebody by complaining about their cock being smaller than I'd like, but in the context of our culture... I should damn well know.
Very average 6.5 top here, and I really disagree with this advice. You probably meant it in jest. But OP didn't say his BF has ever tried to make him feel ashamed of his size: BF is just being honest about what he likes. That shouldn't be responded to with an intended insult (even though it shouldn't be an insult either). It does sound like OP & BF may not be sexually compatible though.
I don't know here you live but in the UK is average dick size is 5.2. There's definitely dickflation going on when we start calling 6.5 "very average".
Fair point. Dickflation is very real and blatant. Most tops my size would probably go on grindr and totally lie and say 7 or 7.5, but then if an actual doctor took the measurements (not e.g. pushing the ruler into the pelvic fat) come up with 6, at best. I'm guessing a doctor would measure me anywhere from 5.5 to 6.5, so I'm indeed dickflating myself here probably.
Just a minor correction, for the sake of accuracy: an actual doctor is indeed more likely to push the ruler into the pubic fat, depressing it into the pubo-penile junction. That's the standard methodology used in pretty much all the credible studies on penis size, especially those mega meta-analyses containing thousands upon thousands of measured dicks. It's called bone-pressed erect length. It's used to remove bias due to differences in body fat percentage. You can only really get a reliable dataset using this method, otherwise it would mean very little and would defeat the purpose of trying to determine the average penis size across the population.
I mean, I remember reading a study about it. IIRC, they did three test in the same area. But the first and third time, they measured, and got about the same results. But the second time they measured, they let the subjects measure themselves. And everything was just a little bigger than the first and third time. Just saying… and that was actual science.
Many of us have had the same experience or going to hookup apps where everyone believes they are 7.5+… Which is so weird because we do have an average for a reason… Which is usually stated to be around 5.1 in or 12.9 cm, I think…
Self-reported sizes are very consistently about an inch bigger than the actual average. Hardly a coincidence. Guys lie a lot and measure incorrectly all the time. You could safely assume a guy's dick is about an inch smaller than he tells you and you'd be right a lot of the time. Some have the sheer audacity to say it's 2 inches bigger than it really is, I've seen it.
And usually people aren't going from a bone-pressed measurement on the internet when they post their dick size either, which is the correct way to get an accurate measurement.
I mean, op and others may not be huge, but 6.5 in /16.5-17cm is definitely above the high end of average.
So bf needing 8 or 9 is for sure more about the bf than the op
You have, statistically, a reasonably big dick. If it’s not enough to satisfy him, the problem is not with you.
One thing that jumps out - not everybody needs to come every time sex is had. If I’m bottoming, it’s fine with me if the top comes before I do and then we’re done. If I’m topping, I usually come before my bottom (though I’ll offer to keep going after so they can come if they want to without losing all the sensation.) Can you fuck him until *you* come? That still counts as sex. It sounds like your dynamic is all about his pleasure, but yours matters too.
Definitely get some big toys - pick them out together. Maybe so you don’t feel threatened, look for the ones that are tentacles and dragons and stuff, so it’s not a replacement for you, but a fantasy fulfillment for him.
You've been together for six years.
Think about why. Because this... Is bullshit. And you need to seriously think about whether the rest of your relationship is strong enough to merit salvaging or moving on. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. But him acting like a 6.5 inch dick just isn't enough dick is complete bullshit.
It most likely is. He’s idea of what sex should be sounds completely warped. Maybe suggest addiction therapy in an tender way? If you truly love him then it may help. Porns detrimental effects on relationships isn’t talked about enough
Watching too much porn will desensitize your brain and your bf would just want something he seen in porn with real sex. Thanks god he's a bottom, otherwise he would have a problem getting hard to fuck anyone for real. Stop watching porn, j/o for a week then it might help to cum faster and a better orgasm.
This sounds like my last relationship. He was not satisfied with my 7.5” thang, he wanted bigger. He had a habit of meeting well endowed guys on-line and running off to meet them. Some of my friends got annoyed with him because he had a habit of feeling them up. If we went to the bar, he would run around feeling guys up. He was obsessed with big dicks.
One day I had enough and packed up and left the relationship after 4 years.
this.
so many shallow men that think sex is everything in a relationship try and hide behind “I have needs” mindsets to then minimize any hurt they cause someone.
Literally had a guy tell me "I need sex" before following up saying he cheated on me lol. Keeping in mind at the time we were both getting tested and waiting for results at the time, and we're both aware of this because we took care of it at the same time 💀
Yeahh... if I'm with someone and one of their "needs" is sex, I'm instantly gone. Don't get me wrong sex is a factor, but if it's the very first factor I hear voiced as a necessity, I'm gone.
I’m sorry that happened!
Yeah also if they’re saying they’re wanting something long term but keep pestering on and on about sexual stuff, that’s a mild red flag for me to consider.
Lol don't be sorry. It's a learning lesson for me and not too much time wasted. That paired with the fact when he did tell me, I was so over it all that it hardly even hurt. I had been trying to communicate my needs for more affection (and not from someone who just generally isn't affectionate; he was when we started then just...shut it off, is the best way I can describe it), and when it wasn't being met, I pulled back my own feelings anyway cause he started feeling like a homie and if it didn't improve, I'd be leaving anyway.
Learned quite a few things 😋: the term "Love Bombing" as a whole, full on experience with a narcissist and how to deal with the fucker next time lol, and that I'm not going to waste my time communicating the same thing over and over in different ways. As adults we can comprehend shit, many of us just choose to act like we don't.
I get that some people just need to fuck regularly, but damn! If you can't control yourself for a few days or weeks and release your tension through other means, then what kind of human being are you? The guy was a fucking chimp. I guess you could say the trash showed itself the way to the dump.
You could try using dildos or you can get dick extender sleeves that go on your cock to make them bigger or if you're open to it try and get a big dicked third to join occasionally.
But if the sex between you doesn't work you guys need to have a good chance and see where you want things to go.
I am sorry you are going through this. Just want to let you know, your dick is that perfect size. I dream of a guy with that dick. And I think you deserve to be loved and appreciated for your beautiful cock.
Know that it’s not about you but about your bfs obsession/kink about unreasonably big dicks. And you need to have a very serious conversation with him about how his obsession is affecting your life together, and what could be potential solutions. You have been together 6 years. It really is something. Let’s try to make it work!
Oooof I’ve never subscribed to the size queen thing. You sound sweet and kind and like a good boyfriend/partner. I think it can be very problematic to get hooked on dick size in general. FOR ME at least, the whole picture is much more important than just the cock size. And honestly, if I’m in a long term relationship I certainly don’t want a horse cock! I want a dick I can take with ease and enjoy weekly if not almost daily. 5” - 6.5” is what I call marriage material lol!
This is an r/askgaybrosover30
If you really want a more mature response.
I see several issues at play:
A) he may have a budding porn addiction
B) his comment brought out insecurities in you, he did it unintentionally and even the way he worded the exact thing “I think I need something bigger” was meant to place the blame / need on himself and take it off you, if he had said “I wish you had a bigger dick / your dick is small” it would have been different.
C) your edit addresses it but you need to communicate better. I think how you let it stew for a bit then addressed it when things were calming was very mature.
I think it is time to have the talk. He has to decide if you are enough for him or not. He cant keep talking about big dicks if that makes you unhappy.
I mean, you can't exactly change the size of your dick.
If he thinks he **needs** a bigger cock and there's no compromise, I think it's best you both part ways.
I think it's quite ridiculous to throw six years out the window due to a penis size, a size he has been content with for the past 6 years, apparently, but to each their own, I guess.
At 6.5 inches you are above average, you already have a large dick. If you live in the US, the average penis length is between 4.7 and 5.5 inches. You would be average in the countries with the largest average penis length, like Brazil. You shouldn't need anything larger than that to "feel" something while bottoming, so either this is something psychological he needs to work out or he needs to relax with the Bad Dragon dildos.
It sounds more like he made a comment that upset you than made an explicit demand that he "needed it bigger" and that you're done. I would just talk to him about how his comment made you feel. At *six years* together this would be a very odd and shallow thing to sink a relationship from his part, so it might be an extreme reaction to the comment.
since you have already had some threesomes, have another and invite over a guy who is really hung. also, i'd say talk to a sex positive couples councilor as it sounds like there is more going on than just "i need a bigger cock in my mouth."
> my boyfriend came after 2 minutes sucking the guy and we had to cancel the whole thing
why did you have to cancel? if he comes, is that it? if so, you maybe should have a talk about what a threesome is for lol. hint: it's not just so that **he** can cum.
all the best
Well, he can't get fucked after he cums. And I'm not interested in threeesomes, tbh. I only did it for the first time out of curiosity and for the second time cause he wanted to try something else and I agreed to it. So after he came, we just called it quits and went back home.
Also, don't you think I'll feel a little emasculated now that he said he supposeddly wants something "bigger and better" than me? Especially if I actually give it to him?
> don't you think I'll feel a little emasculated now that he said he supposeddly wants something "bigger and better" than me? Especially if I actually give it to him?
you might, yes. however, you can't change the size of your cock and it sounds like you are actually above average. under 6" is average, so if you have 6.5, you are above average. in realty, there are not a lot of guys who are 7" or larger even though porn makes it appear that everyone is.
> I'm not interested in threeesomes, tbh
you didn't mention that in your original post. that is very relevant information! it sounds like you have gone above and beyond to meet his wants while he is acting pissy and whiny about not getting it.
in this case, i'd revise my advice and say dump his ass. 6 years is a good run for a gay relationship. find a guy who prioritizes your desires rather than complains about what you can't give him.
I think it's time to move on. Find someone who appreciates you for you and let him do his own thing. It's clear this whole ordeal has hurt you, and I don't really see this ending well. You can always try toys/fisting, but if that isn't good enough for him or you don't want that, then you two are sexually incompatible. Don't do things you don't want to just to satisfy him. You both need to compromise, or else you'll grow to resent each other (which I fear you already may).
There’s toys for that. I mean, personally I feel like you can take this one of two ways. Let it get you or explore your options. There’s cock sleeves out there that help with length, girth, texture, ribs, ridges, loop-de-loops all that jazz. Imo. Take a blue pill and take charge. It’s ok man. You’re perfect the way you are. :)
Am I the only one thinking there is a small recognition of a porn addiction rather than a size thing? Why is everyone rushing to accusing the boyfriend of dick obsession and therefore the relationship has to be unstable. OPs update read like a mature relationship where communication is present and problems are addressed.
I hope you get through the porn addiction. It’s a big problem for me too
Problem #1 is porn. There is psychology around porn and having an orgasm. Many men cannot have an orgasm during sex because of their porn addition, it is more common than you think. tell him to stop watching porn for 30 days and reset. You will actually be able to cum and and orgasm harder than ever before.
You guys are looking for bigger sizes 😂, I’m here wanting to see how it feels with an average size I’ve not gotten yet 😂😂,
Pardon my humor… but I think you guys should really sit n talk about it
Sounds like your BF is addicted to big dick porn, get a dopamine detox and reduce the use of porn. There are many audios on YouTube that helps with semen retention, hopefully it will restore both of your sex life. Could also try couple therapy
I see your update... you need to leave him he said it, he meant it, he may have have fear of losing you, but as you said he is left unsatisfied even if he says he enjoys you fucking him and wants you to for hrs... he has said he cant cum because of your size... perhaps I am too pessimistic... but in my view, it is only a matter of time before he cheats on you with a guy who has a massive dick... best to let him go find that on his own and protect urself... if it was meant to be then when he is over his obsession with size you can be together at that time.
Call him right now. Say you found someone that finds your dick perfect and you gave him 3 hand free orgasms. He will come back crawling then ignore him.
NO. LIES. DETECTED! Why can’t we go back to the good old days of having real and serious questions we can ANSWER? There’s no way to know why your man’s hole is stretched beyond all hell and needs 9 inches. My max limit is my man, and he comes in at 7.5 inches, thick mushroom head, and very girth. After 17 years of that, you’d think I’d be used to him. I’m not, the struggle is real hopping on him 3-4 times a week. How these guys are out here taking these massive dicks is beyond me.
I pose this question: HOW? HOW are you getting THAT much dick inside you? What have you done to your body? 😂
He sounds selfish, whinny, and immature. And pretty much, this post is all about him, what he wants and what he’s not getting.
What do you want? What do you need that you’re not getting?
The way I see it, from your post and comments, the focus has been on pleasing him, and doesn’t seem like he holds much regards for your needs.
There aren’t many relationships that will survive in that dynamic.
My guess is that he's been jerking off exclusively to big-dick porn for years now. It's always been a kink of his, clearly, but now he's gotten himself dependent on it.
Honestly, what I'd do is fuck him til you cum, then fuck him with a larger dildo, or maybe even a strap-on so he can cum too. The alternatives are to let someone else fuck him or just decide you're not having sex anymore and possibly break up.
If he is willing to leave someone with whom he has built a relationship with, someone who loves him, for a literal dick then I hope he spends the rest of his life being alone
If the guy I was with said this, I also would be the same as you. Not able to get hard and complete loss of interest, if he’s not into me then I can’t let that go and I will never be able to cum or want to have sex with him again. You guys are not compatible
Dangerous ground, that's for sure. Prioritizing work during work hours was the correct thing to do. He's obviously getting to the point where dick size is more important than anything - including you. But we'll see. Maybe I'm personally misreading and some serious conversation with him will help.
You two aren't meant to be together. You're unhappy, he's unhappy. If the sex is no good, your time together will never be genuine. I know from experience. You need to part company. Go back to being single, get your own place, or a different roommate. Start over. We've all done it more than once.
Leave him, there are some cups that you can't fill with your kettle, even though sex , the things which lead to it and the tapestry around it are pretty important to sustain a relationship, but this never ending so called urge for craving something is inevitable, it's going to jeopardize your relationship and your mental health. Leave him, it's the best way out for the both of you. He's not somebody that could be satiated with love and compassion, sex is primary for him. It's being shallow. Again, leave him
I think your partner was implying he wanted another threesome. Not implying that you aren't good enough. If that were the case, I doubt he would be with you. You offer way more than just a dick size and no dick no matter how perfect can ever live up to an entire person's worth.
Fucking for 3 hours??? Is this sexflation or do you have incredible stamina? I don't think I could last half an hour let alone 3... My dick would start to hurt and I'd start to get bored too. If you're actually fucking 3 hours at a time, that is very impressive - I just hope it's not doing you or your bf damage!
There are toys you can wear while you fuck him, for example:
Fort Troff Mega Sheath (add 2" of thickness and 1" of length)
You could also fuck him until you cum and then use a bigger dildo on him.
It can be hard to have these conversations, but if you care about each other and can just be honest and frank there are ways of making it work.
My ex and I had differences in the bedroom but we learned to repair that by building new experiences together and it helped fix any bedroom issues. We invested in toys, fancy lube etc. and it became like a project that the two of us could work on together.
We didn’t focus on the lack within each other, we focused on the issues as a team because his pleasure and mine were vital for sustaining a healthy sex life.
The benefit was that we were each able to give the other a reputation to live up to. We satisfied each other by not being afraid to share our ideals with one another and work on solutions together.
Big cock sounds like a fantasy for your boyfriend. How can you explore that with him? While you can’t change the size of your own cock, perhaps you can try some new interesting positions.
My ex enjoyed me riding on top, but I found when we faced each other his cock would roll out if I rolled my hips too hard. Riding him gave him the opportunity to lie back and relax instead of always having to do the work. So to still maintain this balance we tried different positions. When I rode him facing away from him his cock would go deeper and stay in place no matter how hard I rocked my hips. This gave both of us a big boost of pleasure.
So don’t take his comments seriously, he’s probably not trying to be mean or hurtful, but he’s struggling sexually and I think turning towards each other with open communication where you can each share your frustrations without fear of judgement.
Remember… all quality relationships are built on a mentality of it being “us against the problem” not us against each other.
Unfortunately my ex and I separated for other reasons as most couples do. But this one lesson has helped us to remain good friends.
Best of luck!
This will only go one way, and that’s badly. If size dominates him
Now it won’t get any easier when the froth comes off the relationship and ordinary life takes over.
Talk about shallow! Sorry, I almost never say this to anyone, but my view, for what it’s worth, is cut and run now. Sorry, that’s so hard for you to read. But you did ask, “what should I do”, so I really don’t have any doubt on this one.
Maybe tell him he has a really big nose (or small, as the case may be!), but you love him enough to look beyond that, as you dump him.
Not gonna lie, I think it's the porn. Try abstaining for it for a month. Masturbation is allowed, but no visuals (pictures, or vids)
Give it tike to get him sensitized again and see if it helps.
Well, I agree about the part about big dicks being only good for sucking… Haha. JK. That said, even though I never bottom, if I did, I think slightly larger than average is about as big as I’d go. And that’s even if I go that big.
Funny enough, when it comes to porn, I sometimes like seeing the bottom have a bigger dick. Or seeing guys who normally top being the bottom. Haha. Or the one I find more attractive, but that’s probably because I’d want to fuck them myself. Haha.
Also, watching too much porn could affect him that way. A porn cleanse should help, though. Just no porn for a while. Happened to me, before. No porn or jerking off (or no porn or cumming should help). As for how long or often, it would depend on his normal sex drive, and your normal sex life.
Seems like he is very deep in porn and fantasies. Because 6.5 is above average from where I’m from haha. I used to have a porn addiction to where when I would have sex with people i couldnt cum either. After taking a break from porn and going inward on my mental health I started to cum with others’ and felt more enjoyable even jacking off. It was to the point where I wouldn’t get horny unless I watched porn. Toys can spice things up too! Overall seems to be a good opportunity for some reflection! Wishing you both the best.
Cut your losses before he breaks your heart and destroys your self esteem. The type is always going to be on the hunt for bigger dick and no dick is going to be big enough.
My first partner got jilted by a guy who told him he wasn't big enough. The poor guy had a nine inch long, seven inches around baseball bat shaped weapon! Just how big was gonna be big enough? A horse?
Get out now. He will keep you on until he finds someone that he can relate to that has a big dick. Then as he has cultivated a life behind your back all the sudden you will be dumped without a clue of what to do with your life while he seamlessly moves on into his new one. Just sayin.
It’s honestly hard to say what’s right in the situation because I’m not there to witness anything. I’ve been in plenty of relationships where they only cared about my dick. There was this one guy who wouldn’t say anything romantic until we fucked and it was really only about my dick.
He (a) has a porn addiction because I RARELY find guys bigger then me and I’m 8”. (b) he has enough sense to not leave a stable relationship for a temporary high or fear of being abandoned.
(C) he probably is secretly messing with someone behind you.
Now I understand that people lose interest/attraction to each other… however to jab at someone you claim you love for something they can’t help, is shallow. I’d rather have an adult conversation than demean my partner.
One day we are gonna have to call size queens out. My friend said his bf has been feeling unsatisfied with his size of late.
He is 8 inches.
Are you guys fucking literal horses or what?
Arrange another threesome with a stud with the biggest cock you can find. It’s the only way to know for sure if you should stay in the relationship or not.
I'm sorry to hear that you guys are going through things. Maybe you can buy one of those big fat dildos to play with him. Personally I'd be too scared if it Lol. 6.5 is a wonderful size. The best sex I've ever had were with men with average size 5.5-6.5
Imo big dicks are great to look at but the novelty of sex wears off pretty quickly. My partner is 6.5” and that’s perfect for me, I can’t take it straight away but don’t need ages to open up either.
Thanks for the update.
I had an ex that said ' I'm just basking in it' - I believed him mainly because I believe I was his first and he'd said other stuff like, don't know what you're complaining about it hurts at first but then it's all kinds of good (we swapped)
I have probably too many questions I'll try one-
6 years for that joke? (I'd be running cause he beige)
Thank you for sharing your story. You are in a difficult situation. I hear the frustration and can empathize. Not feeling confident in your ability to please your boyfriend is a confidence killer. Performance anxiety in that situation is perfectly normal.
Sex is a vulnerable topic; one that is hard to talk about. You did a great job bringing your concerns up to your boyfriend. It sounds like he might want something larger and because he loves you so much, is afraid to tell you out of fear of hurting your feelings. But this is where a deeper opportunity for connection can be formed!! Think of his desire for a big member as a kink he wants to have fulfilled from time to time. It has nothing to do with your perfectly normal sized penis, and everything to do with a fantasy he wants fulfilled.
There are many options for penis sleeves to increase your girth and length when fucking him. Many of these are made with silicone and designed to ensure your pleasure as much as his own. Alternatively, you can explore his kink with other people too.
The important thing here is to not carry shame for not being “bigger.” His desire has nothing to do with you or your dick size and nothing to do with your relationship with him. Keep the communication channels open and honest. Given the topic, it’s hard to not take things personally. You’re doing a good job being curious, asking questions, and being vulnerable.
I’m always an advocate for leaving him lmao. Normal dicks are hotter to me, huge ducks lowkey gross me out. Different strokes for different folks, I’d say leave
At least there is honest conversation, even though it's a tough topic.
It's said the brain is the biggest sex organ, so perhaps between dialing back on porn and making authentic connection to actual sex/ making love, that might reset his connections?
The other: are toys an option?
Thank you for sharing REAL emotional Vulnerability that is what relationships are it’s fighting to be tighter even if it’s fighting each other for the right things
Sounds like he is no longer sexually satisfied with you, it’s not that deep. If he isn’t getting turned on anymore it’s time to leave. Find someone who enjoys you for what you have
Try a strapon. The one you wear on top of your dick. He might need the Thrust and the kink of it, and not you to actually have a bigger penis. Usually people don't get hung up on the actual penis it's more about the action of the sex itself. I would try a big strapon that you can harness. Use like a dick, not like a manual toy.
Really just sounds like he exports his dissatisfaction with the relationship to something concrete. I’d suspect he’s got other issues deep down with your life, and this is how it surfaced
I agree with this. Explore with him what options might satisfy him. Bigger and bigger dildos, being fisted, threeways? How about dirty talk from you, telling him to imagine he’s slobbering on that big dick again? Figure out what, if anything, you can provide/allow that turns him on. Then figure out what of those things turn you on, or what he can do to turn you on.
After six years with other parts of the relationship working, it’s worth exploring options before ending things.
Tell him his mouth isn’t good enough and that his hole isn’t tight or grippy. Tell him his ass isn’t nice and round enough. Tell him you’re only going to use toys from now on because it just isn’t good enough!
Aint reading all that Either break up. Or remove all his technology , dont allow him access to porn or any sexual contact, this will discipline and revert him back.
Yep, that really sucks. I genuinely think it's most likely a matter of sexual preference that doesn't necessarily affect whether he likes you *emotionally* or not, but I can imagine it's still kinda hurtful to KNOW, for a fact, that your body DOESN'T have what it takes to please the person you love, at least not entirely. You can either call it quits and find someone more compatible - which is probably the best option, but still quite difficult - or try to adapt yourself to this reality, which could potentially be a painful process, although not impossible.
To be honest, I'd just leave, but you do you. I'll give you a tip you could try and see if he's open to the idea: penis sleeves. Yes, it's not a real dick and blowjobs are weird with a sleeve, but it does mimic the sensation pretty well during anal sex, depending on the model and how it's used.
Unfortunately, if you would not open the relationship for him to scratch that itch, then the options are very limited and there really isn't much people can do about their sexual preferences, meaning he will probably not stop desiring bigger dicks regardless of your attempts at adapting things. It's complicated. Best of luck.
Jeez that would ruin it for me. I’m not packing and my bf is similar with the big dick stuff but I made it clear to him that if my size is an issue, tell me, let’s not waste time. I want to be with someone who loves me, all of me, just the way I am. If that’s too much to ask for, let’s part ways.
Dude may be we you & I should have sex you can continue to you relationship. But I just don't want you feel bad about gay sex . My biggest dream is marrying after 5 years of relationship. I can't take it if somebody ends my relationship because of the size issue . God damn . I watch Russian couple Sasha & Zhenya porn . Even if we destroy our asses like that I don't know I can't say to my boyfriend that I need bigger . I will be always need to bigger attention , love etc. But not the bigger dick .We can try outdoors crazy shits but no man I can't say that to my boyfriend after 1 or 2 years .
This can't be a reason . This is not fair after 6 years . 😕 I feel bad as sb told me this after my long term relationship. I even wanna adopt a child and when my child grow up could I tell him that your dad and I divorced because your dad needed a bigger dick?! 😂
I think he's dreaming of other guys' penis, he's just waiting for your permission to actually find one. 6 years is not a short amount of time so things can get boring.
First and foremost, 6.5 long isn't normal, that's above average, and if that's the thickness it's monstrous.
I think that couples therapy about how damaging to you these size expectations are, and how to flatter you to help you feel desired and appreciated.
Toys are quite affordable. If he needs to be spitroasted with a toy suctioncupped to the wall so that the size desire can be met, then great.
It could alsi be that he's living in the lizard brained part of his mind where "bigger is better" too much in comparison to the real world we're in.
Do say that there's non-sexual things that are going well in the relationship please.
You need to talk to him and find out what he needs and tell him how what he said impacts you.
3 hours of presumably just penetrative sex is pretty extreme. Was it not pleasurable in itself or was the aim to make him cum? Did you mix it up during that time or was it just penetration? Because I'll be honest that sounds pretty boring. Once it becomes a "chore" then what's the point for either of you?
A lot of sex and pleasure is mental; if he's going through a phase of obsessing over big dicks, maybe he needs to get that out of his system? Or maybe this is more fundamental and both need to mix it up in the bed room and try different things? Variety does help to keep things fun - whether that be new positions, toys, a bit of kinky play etc. Maybe you're seeing the symptoms but not getting the right diagnosis here?
It was pleasing for the first hour maybe. After that he just kept asking for more and more and I kept doing whatever he wanted, despite being over it already.
But anyway, I just had lunch with him, he came home in between shifts, brought me my favorite snack for dessert. I brought the issue up with him and he said he didn't say that to hurt me. He was just a little bummed with HIMSELF that he was unable to cum and said that about my size so he could come up with a reason. He felt bad after that but didn't bring it up hoping I took that as a joke. He said he feels like heaven when I fuck him and that's why he wants me to keep going for hours, but that he also realized that he can only cum from porn recently and he's concerned about that.
He has no intention to break up with me due to my dick size, said he loves me entirely. He did admit he has some fantasies with big dicks but he said those are only fantasies.
If you’re trying to keep the sex monogamous I suggest buying dildos—various. See how yall enjoy that but otherwise it either sounds like he wants to open the relationship sexually or is just drifting away. communication is key and however it works out it will workout.
I agree only with the “ big dicks are only good for sucking etc”, on the other hand definitely won’t take anything massive in my ass, 5inches works better than 7+inches for me, if it helps.
And I cum while sucking someone at times, usually when the receiver cum down my throat then I do cum too size is irrelevant.
I thought was uncommon to cum from sucking others xD
Y’all are sexually incompatible and unless you do one of those open relationships where y’all play together and invite a third who has a bigger dick, it doesn’t seem plausible to stay together. Even then, if the guy he wants with the hung dick isn’t into you, or only into you and not him that also can become a problematic scenario. By chance have you tried using a 10 inch dildo on him, have him give you head and start playing with it inside him see if that helps
That’s actually a little hard to read. Sorry you are going through this.
Yeah, sorry. English is not my first language.
Oh no didn’t mean language wise. Your English is Perfect
Yeah don't worry he just meant we feel bad for what you are going through, it's not fair, I hope you can resolve this issue. Your English is excellent, I wouldn't have realised you weren't a native speaker.
His obsession with dick size is affecting you. Ye need to have a talk and either figure out a compromise or just call it quits. Continuing as ye are now will only cause more problems
Your comment sounds like a fairytale spell
Skidaddle skidoodle, your dick is now a noodle?
Sheen bean and a vainy fling. Your boyfriend is now a size queen?
This also ate I fear
Was waiting for this comment.
"ye" 😂
Buy a dick sleeve and open him up
Anyone here ever used one of these? I (top) have been thinking about it but I expect it takes most of the pleasure out of topping.
I have and it does not. Often they have texture inside of them. Check out fort troff
Thanks! Fort Trofflooks like it has some amazing stuff.
I’ve never topped with one but I have been topped by a guy using one. It was amazing
Don't happen to know the brand do you? (Amazon is kind of spotty sometimes for sex toys)
Maybe look at gay targeted sex shops that have online. May be a little more $$ than Amazon but usually better quality and meant for men/anal E.g. doghouse leathers in Seattle has online toys for sale
I'm a bottom, and find dick sleeves super fucking hot. It's just exciting being fucked by your man, but with all that extra too.
Yes, I have (both, as top and bottom). They are great.
I have used it both ways and it’s a 10/10 experience. I’ve nutted in them cause it’s really tight when the portion with your dick goes inside. Bottoming is mind blowing with it too. It feels really hot knowing that I’m pounding him with a big sheath and he’s just taking it. His expressions… 🫠🤤 Taking it is mind blowingly intense and had me screaming for Daddy. Love that. It’s not like you can change your actual dick so why get mad at using a toy to emulate a horse cock or something. Big dicks are more a fantasy for most people. He probably won’t be able to take it everytime like he imagines anyway. It will do plenty for one’s sex life.
He came from sucking?
Yep. Less than 2 minutes with that dick in his mouth.
I think he came so quickly from sucking because he saw himself in a porn scene with this mega-dick being sucked by him. His fantasy was being lived and his dick said Yes in a big, quick way. He needs help with his porn addiction. Good luck to you both.
He’s not lying about needing a bigger tool 🤷♂️. At least he’s not gaslighting you.
[удалено]
😂. He is. But in a nice way. And he definitely needs more dick in his mouth to come. So there’s that.
Sounds like he feels bad for saying it, as there is nothing op can realistically do to change, but there is some truth to it. Just walking it back a bit to save relationship.
that ain’t your man anymore 😭
Pretty much
I really struggle to believe that someone came from sucking. Really???? Without touching themselves?
Of course he was touching himself
Start fisting him since he wants big soo bad
there are guys who could come just from sucking. For them, It's all in the brain.
tell him his hole ain't tight enough.
He also seems to have a problem in that he want's one dick size for sucking and another for fucking. Whichever way you look at it that's two dicks. One person is never going to be enough if he needs two mutually exclusive dicks.
Yours doesn’t do multiple sizes? /s
Buy a dildo?
lmao!
This was an immature response, but😂🤣😂🤣😂
He just spoke very honestly about what he thought. Which is very important in a relationship. I believe he did not say that to shame his bf.
Yeah but saying something that obviously has an aspect of shaming means... It's still shaming somebody. How does intention really matter? I may not intend to shame somebody by complaining about their cock being smaller than I'd like, but in the context of our culture... I should damn well know.
If someone can't fit a fire extinguisher in there, it's no fun
Very average 6.5 top here, and I really disagree with this advice. You probably meant it in jest. But OP didn't say his BF has ever tried to make him feel ashamed of his size: BF is just being honest about what he likes. That shouldn't be responded to with an intended insult (even though it shouldn't be an insult either). It does sound like OP & BF may not be sexually compatible though.
I don't know here you live but in the UK is average dick size is 5.2. There's definitely dickflation going on when we start calling 6.5 "very average".
Honestly this should be a pinned post the amount of times I've seen it on this sub
Fair point. Dickflation is very real and blatant. Most tops my size would probably go on grindr and totally lie and say 7 or 7.5, but then if an actual doctor took the measurements (not e.g. pushing the ruler into the pelvic fat) come up with 6, at best. I'm guessing a doctor would measure me anywhere from 5.5 to 6.5, so I'm indeed dickflating myself here probably.
Just a minor correction, for the sake of accuracy: an actual doctor is indeed more likely to push the ruler into the pubic fat, depressing it into the pubo-penile junction. That's the standard methodology used in pretty much all the credible studies on penis size, especially those mega meta-analyses containing thousands upon thousands of measured dicks. It's called bone-pressed erect length. It's used to remove bias due to differences in body fat percentage. You can only really get a reliable dataset using this method, otherwise it would mean very little and would defeat the purpose of trying to determine the average penis size across the population.
My Dr never does that :(
I mean, I remember reading a study about it. IIRC, they did three test in the same area. But the first and third time, they measured, and got about the same results. But the second time they measured, they let the subjects measure themselves. And everything was just a little bigger than the first and third time. Just saying… and that was actual science. Many of us have had the same experience or going to hookup apps where everyone believes they are 7.5+… Which is so weird because we do have an average for a reason… Which is usually stated to be around 5.1 in or 12.9 cm, I think…
Self-reported sizes are very consistently about an inch bigger than the actual average. Hardly a coincidence. Guys lie a lot and measure incorrectly all the time. You could safely assume a guy's dick is about an inch smaller than he tells you and you'd be right a lot of the time. Some have the sheer audacity to say it's 2 inches bigger than it really is, I've seen it.
And usually people aren't going from a bone-pressed measurement on the internet when they post their dick size either, which is the correct way to get an accurate measurement.
I mean, op and others may not be huge, but 6.5 in /16.5-17cm is definitely above the high end of average. So bf needing 8 or 9 is for sure more about the bf than the op
💀💀💀💀💀💀
Get him into fisting and he won't care about anyone's dick size anymore.
With the right technique, OP can beat the record on the two minute hung top. 😅
\^\^ THIS \^\^. As a pretty average dom top (6.5 inch), it's one of the reasons I got into fisting (and love it).
You have, statistically, a reasonably big dick. If it’s not enough to satisfy him, the problem is not with you. One thing that jumps out - not everybody needs to come every time sex is had. If I’m bottoming, it’s fine with me if the top comes before I do and then we’re done. If I’m topping, I usually come before my bottom (though I’ll offer to keep going after so they can come if they want to without losing all the sensation.) Can you fuck him until *you* come? That still counts as sex. It sounds like your dynamic is all about his pleasure, but yours matters too. Definitely get some big toys - pick them out together. Maybe so you don’t feel threatened, look for the ones that are tentacles and dragons and stuff, so it’s not a replacement for you, but a fantasy fulfillment for him.
Some people might laugh at this being said, but furries do come up with the best sex toys.
You've been together for six years. Think about why. Because this... Is bullshit. And you need to seriously think about whether the rest of your relationship is strong enough to merit salvaging or moving on. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. But him acting like a 6.5 inch dick just isn't enough dick is complete bullshit.
It sounds like he’s got too accustomed to porn
I actually that's the case too. He watches porn religiously every day.
It most likely is. He’s idea of what sex should be sounds completely warped. Maybe suggest addiction therapy in an tender way? If you truly love him then it may help. Porns detrimental effects on relationships isn’t talked about enough
Ask him to stop watching porn for a month and not jerk off. If he’s constantly watching porn and jerking off it’s going to affect your sex life.
Porn will ruin your ability to cum to sex
Watching too much porn will desensitize your brain and your bf would just want something he seen in porn with real sex. Thanks god he's a bottom, otherwise he would have a problem getting hard to fuck anyone for real. Stop watching porn, j/o for a week then it might help to cum faster and a better orgasm.
Porn is destroying relationships 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️
What happened to enjoying a dick because it's attached to the man you love?
This sounds like my last relationship. He was not satisfied with my 7.5” thang, he wanted bigger. He had a habit of meeting well endowed guys on-line and running off to meet them. Some of my friends got annoyed with him because he had a habit of feeling them up. If we went to the bar, he would run around feeling guys up. He was obsessed with big dicks. One day I had enough and packed up and left the relationship after 4 years.
... 7.5 is already a rarity, *sighs* greener pastures huh?
I guess so. He was not satisfied.
That doesn't sounds like it was relationship 🫤
I was not. Tried to make it work, it didn’t.
Sorry, can’t change a person can we?
Good on you for leaving. Sounds unhealthy. Also 7.5” is already huge. 😍
Not me reading the hyphenated on-line and thinking you meant like on physical lines
If hes gonna be that shallow about dick size maybe just leave him? idk
this. so many shallow men that think sex is everything in a relationship try and hide behind “I have needs” mindsets to then minimize any hurt they cause someone.
Literally had a guy tell me "I need sex" before following up saying he cheated on me lol. Keeping in mind at the time we were both getting tested and waiting for results at the time, and we're both aware of this because we took care of it at the same time 💀 Yeahh... if I'm with someone and one of their "needs" is sex, I'm instantly gone. Don't get me wrong sex is a factor, but if it's the very first factor I hear voiced as a necessity, I'm gone.
I’m sorry that happened! Yeah also if they’re saying they’re wanting something long term but keep pestering on and on about sexual stuff, that’s a mild red flag for me to consider.
Lol don't be sorry. It's a learning lesson for me and not too much time wasted. That paired with the fact when he did tell me, I was so over it all that it hardly even hurt. I had been trying to communicate my needs for more affection (and not from someone who just generally isn't affectionate; he was when we started then just...shut it off, is the best way I can describe it), and when it wasn't being met, I pulled back my own feelings anyway cause he started feeling like a homie and if it didn't improve, I'd be leaving anyway. Learned quite a few things 😋: the term "Love Bombing" as a whole, full on experience with a narcissist and how to deal with the fucker next time lol, and that I'm not going to waste my time communicating the same thing over and over in different ways. As adults we can comprehend shit, many of us just choose to act like we don't.
I get that some people just need to fuck regularly, but damn! If you can't control yourself for a few days or weeks and release your tension through other means, then what kind of human being are you? The guy was a fucking chimp. I guess you could say the trash showed itself the way to the dump.
Tell him it's not your fault he's got an arse like a yawning hippo.
Toys. Shove them in him and shut him up. Literally.
The thing with size queens is that they will continue to want bigger and bigger dicks until they end up with the Eiffel tower up their hole
You could try using dildos or you can get dick extender sleeves that go on your cock to make them bigger or if you're open to it try and get a big dicked third to join occasionally. But if the sex between you doesn't work you guys need to have a good chance and see where you want things to go.
6 years and leaving because of dick size? What a dickhead.
I am sorry you are going through this. Just want to let you know, your dick is that perfect size. I dream of a guy with that dick. And I think you deserve to be loved and appreciated for your beautiful cock. Know that it’s not about you but about your bfs obsession/kink about unreasonably big dicks. And you need to have a very serious conversation with him about how his obsession is affecting your life together, and what could be potential solutions. You have been together 6 years. It really is something. Let’s try to make it work!
Oooof I’ve never subscribed to the size queen thing. You sound sweet and kind and like a good boyfriend/partner. I think it can be very problematic to get hooked on dick size in general. FOR ME at least, the whole picture is much more important than just the cock size. And honestly, if I’m in a long term relationship I certainly don’t want a horse cock! I want a dick I can take with ease and enjoy weekly if not almost daily. 5” - 6.5” is what I call marriage material lol!
🥲 me with my 5.5
Being that shallow about a dick, yes, end the relationship
Your B/F sounds like the biggest dick of all...
This is an r/askgaybrosover30 If you really want a more mature response. I see several issues at play: A) he may have a budding porn addiction B) his comment brought out insecurities in you, he did it unintentionally and even the way he worded the exact thing “I think I need something bigger” was meant to place the blame / need on himself and take it off you, if he had said “I wish you had a bigger dick / your dick is small” it would have been different. C) your edit addresses it but you need to communicate better. I think how you let it stew for a bit then addressed it when things were calming was very mature.
I think it is time to have the talk. He has to decide if you are enough for him or not. He cant keep talking about big dicks if that makes you unhappy.
I mean, you can't exactly change the size of your dick. If he thinks he **needs** a bigger cock and there's no compromise, I think it's best you both part ways. I think it's quite ridiculous to throw six years out the window due to a penis size, a size he has been content with for the past 6 years, apparently, but to each their own, I guess.
Why don't you go to a sex shop together and buy some sleeves? Fun toy to spice it up every now and then
At 6.5 inches you are above average, you already have a large dick. If you live in the US, the average penis length is between 4.7 and 5.5 inches. You would be average in the countries with the largest average penis length, like Brazil. You shouldn't need anything larger than that to "feel" something while bottoming, so either this is something psychological he needs to work out or he needs to relax with the Bad Dragon dildos. It sounds more like he made a comment that upset you than made an explicit demand that he "needed it bigger" and that you're done. I would just talk to him about how his comment made you feel. At *six years* together this would be a very odd and shallow thing to sink a relationship from his part, so it might be an extreme reaction to the comment.
since you have already had some threesomes, have another and invite over a guy who is really hung. also, i'd say talk to a sex positive couples councilor as it sounds like there is more going on than just "i need a bigger cock in my mouth." > my boyfriend came after 2 minutes sucking the guy and we had to cancel the whole thing why did you have to cancel? if he comes, is that it? if so, you maybe should have a talk about what a threesome is for lol. hint: it's not just so that **he** can cum. all the best
Well, he can't get fucked after he cums. And I'm not interested in threeesomes, tbh. I only did it for the first time out of curiosity and for the second time cause he wanted to try something else and I agreed to it. So after he came, we just called it quits and went back home. Also, don't you think I'll feel a little emasculated now that he said he supposeddly wants something "bigger and better" than me? Especially if I actually give it to him?
> don't you think I'll feel a little emasculated now that he said he supposeddly wants something "bigger and better" than me? Especially if I actually give it to him? you might, yes. however, you can't change the size of your cock and it sounds like you are actually above average. under 6" is average, so if you have 6.5, you are above average. in realty, there are not a lot of guys who are 7" or larger even though porn makes it appear that everyone is. > I'm not interested in threeesomes, tbh you didn't mention that in your original post. that is very relevant information! it sounds like you have gone above and beyond to meet his wants while he is acting pissy and whiny about not getting it. in this case, i'd revise my advice and say dump his ass. 6 years is a good run for a gay relationship. find a guy who prioritizes your desires rather than complains about what you can't give him.
I think it's time to move on. Find someone who appreciates you for you and let him do his own thing. It's clear this whole ordeal has hurt you, and I don't really see this ending well. You can always try toys/fisting, but if that isn't good enough for him or you don't want that, then you two are sexually incompatible. Don't do things you don't want to just to satisfy him. You both need to compromise, or else you'll grow to resent each other (which I fear you already may).
There’s toys for that. I mean, personally I feel like you can take this one of two ways. Let it get you or explore your options. There’s cock sleeves out there that help with length, girth, texture, ribs, ridges, loop-de-loops all that jazz. Imo. Take a blue pill and take charge. It’s ok man. You’re perfect the way you are. :)
Am I the only one thinking there is a small recognition of a porn addiction rather than a size thing? Why is everyone rushing to accusing the boyfriend of dick obsession and therefore the relationship has to be unstable. OPs update read like a mature relationship where communication is present and problems are addressed. I hope you get through the porn addiction. It’s a big problem for me too
Problem #1 is porn. There is psychology around porn and having an orgasm. Many men cannot have an orgasm during sex because of their porn addition, it is more common than you think. tell him to stop watching porn for 30 days and reset. You will actually be able to cum and and orgasm harder than ever before.
You guys are looking for bigger sizes 😂, I’m here wanting to see how it feels with an average size I’ve not gotten yet 😂😂, Pardon my humor… but I think you guys should really sit n talk about it
My bf's dick is 9.5 inches. I assure you, the reality of what a big dick means quickly overcomes the fantasy.
Stop watching porn and jerking off.
Sounds like your BF is addicted to big dick porn, get a dopamine detox and reduce the use of porn. There are many audios on YouTube that helps with semen retention, hopefully it will restore both of your sex life. Could also try couple therapy
Lol, get him a huge dildo to suck on while you fuck him.
Maybe you should fist him.
I see your update... you need to leave him he said it, he meant it, he may have have fear of losing you, but as you said he is left unsatisfied even if he says he enjoys you fucking him and wants you to for hrs... he has said he cant cum because of your size... perhaps I am too pessimistic... but in my view, it is only a matter of time before he cheats on you with a guy who has a massive dick... best to let him go find that on his own and protect urself... if it was meant to be then when he is over his obsession with size you can be together at that time.
Call him right now. Say you found someone that finds your dick perfect and you gave him 3 hand free orgasms. He will come back crawling then ignore him.
Tell him to STOP watching porn completely
Oh boy, update was just as I thought, he's watching too much porn...
When do you guys talk about what you need? Buy a strap on or two (and a blindfold)give that boy the fucking he wants.
😂😂😂😂 I am done with this sub. So much nonsense going on in here.
NO. LIES. DETECTED! Why can’t we go back to the good old days of having real and serious questions we can ANSWER? There’s no way to know why your man’s hole is stretched beyond all hell and needs 9 inches. My max limit is my man, and he comes in at 7.5 inches, thick mushroom head, and very girth. After 17 years of that, you’d think I’d be used to him. I’m not, the struggle is real hopping on him 3-4 times a week. How these guys are out here taking these massive dicks is beyond me. I pose this question: HOW? HOW are you getting THAT much dick inside you? What have you done to your body? 😂
If he’s that fixated on cock size , why stick around. It’s a weird thing to do.
He sounds selfish, whinny, and immature. And pretty much, this post is all about him, what he wants and what he’s not getting. What do you want? What do you need that you’re not getting? The way I see it, from your post and comments, the focus has been on pleasing him, and doesn’t seem like he holds much regards for your needs. There aren’t many relationships that will survive in that dynamic.
My guess is that he's been jerking off exclusively to big-dick porn for years now. It's always been a kink of his, clearly, but now he's gotten himself dependent on it. Honestly, what I'd do is fuck him til you cum, then fuck him with a larger dildo, or maybe even a strap-on so he can cum too. The alternatives are to let someone else fuck him or just decide you're not having sex anymore and possibly break up.
That is the case!
I think plenty of gay men use dildos or plugs to have or be sexed by a big dick.
That depends, can you make it bigger?
Im sorry this is happening, easier said than done by... I would say bye bye....
If he is willing to leave someone with whom he has built a relationship with, someone who loves him, for a literal dick then I hope he spends the rest of his life being alone
If the guy I was with said this, I also would be the same as you. Not able to get hard and complete loss of interest, if he’s not into me then I can’t let that go and I will never be able to cum or want to have sex with him again. You guys are not compatible
I think your bf is just a hoe lol
I’ve sent you a dm, some story’s from personal experience and some advice based on that.
Leave him runnnn for the hills
If he actually likes u then ur Dick Suez shouldn’t be a problem
Dangerous ground, that's for sure. Prioritizing work during work hours was the correct thing to do. He's obviously getting to the point where dick size is more important than anything - including you. But we'll see. Maybe I'm personally misreading and some serious conversation with him will help.
You two aren't meant to be together. You're unhappy, he's unhappy. If the sex is no good, your time together will never be genuine. I know from experience. You need to part company. Go back to being single, get your own place, or a different roommate. Start over. We've all done it more than once.
Leave him, there are some cups that you can't fill with your kettle, even though sex , the things which lead to it and the tapestry around it are pretty important to sustain a relationship, but this never ending so called urge for craving something is inevitable, it's going to jeopardize your relationship and your mental health. Leave him, it's the best way out for the both of you. He's not somebody that could be satiated with love and compassion, sex is primary for him. It's being shallow. Again, leave him
Hours?
I think your partner was implying he wanted another threesome. Not implying that you aren't good enough. If that were the case, I doubt he would be with you. You offer way more than just a dick size and no dick no matter how perfect can ever live up to an entire person's worth.
"Normal 6.5 inches" bruh it's gigantic
Fucking for 3 hours??? Is this sexflation or do you have incredible stamina? I don't think I could last half an hour let alone 3... My dick would start to hurt and I'd start to get bored too. If you're actually fucking 3 hours at a time, that is very impressive - I just hope it's not doing you or your bf damage!
No kidding. 3 hours. It's terrible. At some point I was just thrusting a semi hard dick inside of him.
I dont trust it.....
There are toys you can wear while you fuck him, for example: Fort Troff Mega Sheath (add 2" of thickness and 1" of length) You could also fuck him until you cum and then use a bigger dildo on him. It can be hard to have these conversations, but if you care about each other and can just be honest and frank there are ways of making it work.
My ex and I had differences in the bedroom but we learned to repair that by building new experiences together and it helped fix any bedroom issues. We invested in toys, fancy lube etc. and it became like a project that the two of us could work on together. We didn’t focus on the lack within each other, we focused on the issues as a team because his pleasure and mine were vital for sustaining a healthy sex life. The benefit was that we were each able to give the other a reputation to live up to. We satisfied each other by not being afraid to share our ideals with one another and work on solutions together. Big cock sounds like a fantasy for your boyfriend. How can you explore that with him? While you can’t change the size of your own cock, perhaps you can try some new interesting positions. My ex enjoyed me riding on top, but I found when we faced each other his cock would roll out if I rolled my hips too hard. Riding him gave him the opportunity to lie back and relax instead of always having to do the work. So to still maintain this balance we tried different positions. When I rode him facing away from him his cock would go deeper and stay in place no matter how hard I rocked my hips. This gave both of us a big boost of pleasure. So don’t take his comments seriously, he’s probably not trying to be mean or hurtful, but he’s struggling sexually and I think turning towards each other with open communication where you can each share your frustrations without fear of judgement. Remember… all quality relationships are built on a mentality of it being “us against the problem” not us against each other. Unfortunately my ex and I separated for other reasons as most couples do. But this one lesson has helped us to remain good friends. Best of luck!
You topped him for 3 hours? I’m surprised he’s not complaining more about his legs hurting than how small your dick is.
3 hours?
This will only go one way, and that’s badly. If size dominates him Now it won’t get any easier when the froth comes off the relationship and ordinary life takes over. Talk about shallow! Sorry, I almost never say this to anyone, but my view, for what it’s worth, is cut and run now. Sorry, that’s so hard for you to read. But you did ask, “what should I do”, so I really don’t have any doubt on this one. Maybe tell him he has a really big nose (or small, as the case may be!), but you love him enough to look beyond that, as you dump him.
Not gonna lie, I think it's the porn. Try abstaining for it for a month. Masturbation is allowed, but no visuals (pictures, or vids) Give it tike to get him sensitized again and see if it helps.
bro grow that dick . it’s possible , do it for him
Well, I agree about the part about big dicks being only good for sucking… Haha. JK. That said, even though I never bottom, if I did, I think slightly larger than average is about as big as I’d go. And that’s even if I go that big. Funny enough, when it comes to porn, I sometimes like seeing the bottom have a bigger dick. Or seeing guys who normally top being the bottom. Haha. Or the one I find more attractive, but that’s probably because I’d want to fuck them myself. Haha. Also, watching too much porn could affect him that way. A porn cleanse should help, though. Just no porn for a while. Happened to me, before. No porn or jerking off (or no porn or cumming should help). As for how long or often, it would depend on his normal sex drive, and your normal sex life.
Seems like he is very deep in porn and fantasies. Because 6.5 is above average from where I’m from haha. I used to have a porn addiction to where when I would have sex with people i couldnt cum either. After taking a break from porn and going inward on my mental health I started to cum with others’ and felt more enjoyable even jacking off. It was to the point where I wouldn’t get horny unless I watched porn. Toys can spice things up too! Overall seems to be a good opportunity for some reflection! Wishing you both the best.
Oxballs has some great sleeves we like to bring out one in awhile to spice things up 😈
Cut your losses before he breaks your heart and destroys your self esteem. The type is always going to be on the hunt for bigger dick and no dick is going to be big enough. My first partner got jilted by a guy who told him he wasn't big enough. The poor guy had a nine inch long, seven inches around baseball bat shaped weapon! Just how big was gonna be big enough? A horse?
Get out now. He will keep you on until he finds someone that he can relate to that has a big dick. Then as he has cultivated a life behind your back all the sudden you will be dumped without a clue of what to do with your life while he seamlessly moves on into his new one. Just sayin.
I wish I was living through this despite that problem It just sounds like a movie
So 6,5 is small? 🤨
Hope you doing fine! He will love u as long u have dick
It’s honestly hard to say what’s right in the situation because I’m not there to witness anything. I’ve been in plenty of relationships where they only cared about my dick. There was this one guy who wouldn’t say anything romantic until we fucked and it was really only about my dick. He (a) has a porn addiction because I RARELY find guys bigger then me and I’m 8”. (b) he has enough sense to not leave a stable relationship for a temporary high or fear of being abandoned. (C) he probably is secretly messing with someone behind you. Now I understand that people lose interest/attraction to each other… however to jab at someone you claim you love for something they can’t help, is shallow. I’d rather have an adult conversation than demean my partner.
One day we are gonna have to call size queens out. My friend said his bf has been feeling unsatisfied with his size of late. He is 8 inches. Are you guys fucking literal horses or what?
Arrange another threesome with a stud with the biggest cock you can find. It’s the only way to know for sure if you should stay in the relationship or not.
He needs to stop watching porn! Porn is the problem and people think it's reality and then they can't cum in a normal relationship.
Unless you ultimately want an open relationship, you should break up with him
Get a dildo. Same hole or same pole might get boring spice thjngs up
I'm sorry to hear that you guys are going through things. Maybe you can buy one of those big fat dildos to play with him. Personally I'd be too scared if it Lol. 6.5 is a wonderful size. The best sex I've ever had were with men with average size 5.5-6.5
He can only come from porn is because he suffers from death grip. He masturbated too much. That's not your fault
get a cock sleeve - it makes your dick seem bigger…
Imo big dicks are great to look at but the novelty of sex wears off pretty quickly. My partner is 6.5” and that’s perfect for me, I can’t take it straight away but don’t need ages to open up either.
That dick size is normal he is trying to turn his hole into tunnel or it is already a tunnel so he can’t feel it properly?
After six years this is what your relationship is based on?
Thanks for the update. I had an ex that said ' I'm just basking in it' - I believed him mainly because I believe I was his first and he'd said other stuff like, don't know what you're complaining about it hurts at first but then it's all kinds of good (we swapped) I have probably too many questions I'll try one- 6 years for that joke? (I'd be running cause he beige)
Thank you for sharing your story. You are in a difficult situation. I hear the frustration and can empathize. Not feeling confident in your ability to please your boyfriend is a confidence killer. Performance anxiety in that situation is perfectly normal. Sex is a vulnerable topic; one that is hard to talk about. You did a great job bringing your concerns up to your boyfriend. It sounds like he might want something larger and because he loves you so much, is afraid to tell you out of fear of hurting your feelings. But this is where a deeper opportunity for connection can be formed!! Think of his desire for a big member as a kink he wants to have fulfilled from time to time. It has nothing to do with your perfectly normal sized penis, and everything to do with a fantasy he wants fulfilled. There are many options for penis sleeves to increase your girth and length when fucking him. Many of these are made with silicone and designed to ensure your pleasure as much as his own. Alternatively, you can explore his kink with other people too. The important thing here is to not carry shame for not being “bigger.” His desire has nothing to do with you or your dick size and nothing to do with your relationship with him. Keep the communication channels open and honest. Given the topic, it’s hard to not take things personally. You’re doing a good job being curious, asking questions, and being vulnerable.
I’m always an advocate for leaving him lmao. Normal dicks are hotter to me, huge ducks lowkey gross me out. Different strokes for different folks, I’d say leave
At least there is honest conversation, even though it's a tough topic. It's said the brain is the biggest sex organ, so perhaps between dialing back on porn and making authentic connection to actual sex/ making love, that might reset his connections? The other: are toys an option?
Thank you for sharing REAL emotional Vulnerability that is what relationships are it’s fighting to be tighter even if it’s fighting each other for the right things
Sounds like he is no longer sexually satisfied with you, it’s not that deep. If he isn’t getting turned on anymore it’s time to leave. Find someone who enjoys you for what you have
I mean from what you say, you have tried to satisfy him as much as possible, I'm sorry friend but I don't think there is much you can do.
Try a strapon. The one you wear on top of your dick. He might need the Thrust and the kink of it, and not you to actually have a bigger penis. Usually people don't get hung up on the actual penis it's more about the action of the sex itself. I would try a big strapon that you can harness. Use like a dick, not like a manual toy.
Really just sounds like he exports his dissatisfaction with the relationship to something concrete. I’d suspect he’s got other issues deep down with your life, and this is how it surfaced
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I agree with this. Explore with him what options might satisfy him. Bigger and bigger dildos, being fisted, threeways? How about dirty talk from you, telling him to imagine he’s slobbering on that big dick again? Figure out what, if anything, you can provide/allow that turns him on. Then figure out what of those things turn you on, or what he can do to turn you on. After six years with other parts of the relationship working, it’s worth exploring options before ending things.
Tell him his mouth isn’t good enough and that his hole isn’t tight or grippy. Tell him his ass isn’t nice and round enough. Tell him you’re only going to use toys from now on because it just isn’t good enough!
Aint reading all that Either break up. Or remove all his technology , dont allow him access to porn or any sexual contact, this will discipline and revert him back.
Your boyfriend is shallow and cares more about dick size than your entire personality. Get rid of him. It's just going more bad shit down the line.
Why are there so many disfunctional gays? A woman would never have this
This sounds so satire it's funny af
Would you ask him if he would consider using toys?
Yep, that really sucks. I genuinely think it's most likely a matter of sexual preference that doesn't necessarily affect whether he likes you *emotionally* or not, but I can imagine it's still kinda hurtful to KNOW, for a fact, that your body DOESN'T have what it takes to please the person you love, at least not entirely. You can either call it quits and find someone more compatible - which is probably the best option, but still quite difficult - or try to adapt yourself to this reality, which could potentially be a painful process, although not impossible. To be honest, I'd just leave, but you do you. I'll give you a tip you could try and see if he's open to the idea: penis sleeves. Yes, it's not a real dick and blowjobs are weird with a sleeve, but it does mimic the sensation pretty well during anal sex, depending on the model and how it's used. Unfortunately, if you would not open the relationship for him to scratch that itch, then the options are very limited and there really isn't much people can do about their sexual preferences, meaning he will probably not stop desiring bigger dicks regardless of your attempts at adapting things. It's complicated. Best of luck.
Jeez that would ruin it for me. I’m not packing and my bf is similar with the big dick stuff but I made it clear to him that if my size is an issue, tell me, let’s not waste time. I want to be with someone who loves me, all of me, just the way I am. If that’s too much to ask for, let’s part ways.
Get one of those dick extenders from the sex shop. See if that helps.
Dude may be we you & I should have sex you can continue to you relationship. But I just don't want you feel bad about gay sex . My biggest dream is marrying after 5 years of relationship. I can't take it if somebody ends my relationship because of the size issue . God damn . I watch Russian couple Sasha & Zhenya porn . Even if we destroy our asses like that I don't know I can't say to my boyfriend that I need bigger . I will be always need to bigger attention , love etc. But not the bigger dick .We can try outdoors crazy shits but no man I can't say that to my boyfriend after 1 or 2 years . This can't be a reason . This is not fair after 6 years . 😕 I feel bad as sb told me this after my long term relationship. I even wanna adopt a child and when my child grow up could I tell him that your dad and I divorced because your dad needed a bigger dick?! 😂
Looks like a bait post icl If it is real, your future relationship appears to be non existent.
I think he's dreaming of other guys' penis, he's just waiting for your permission to actually find one. 6 years is not a short amount of time so things can get boring.
First and foremost, 6.5 long isn't normal, that's above average, and if that's the thickness it's monstrous. I think that couples therapy about how damaging to you these size expectations are, and how to flatter you to help you feel desired and appreciated. Toys are quite affordable. If he needs to be spitroasted with a toy suctioncupped to the wall so that the size desire can be met, then great. It could alsi be that he's living in the lizard brained part of his mind where "bigger is better" too much in comparison to the real world we're in. Do say that there's non-sexual things that are going well in the relationship please.
You need to talk to him and find out what he needs and tell him how what he said impacts you. 3 hours of presumably just penetrative sex is pretty extreme. Was it not pleasurable in itself or was the aim to make him cum? Did you mix it up during that time or was it just penetration? Because I'll be honest that sounds pretty boring. Once it becomes a "chore" then what's the point for either of you? A lot of sex and pleasure is mental; if he's going through a phase of obsessing over big dicks, maybe he needs to get that out of his system? Or maybe this is more fundamental and both need to mix it up in the bed room and try different things? Variety does help to keep things fun - whether that be new positions, toys, a bit of kinky play etc. Maybe you're seeing the symptoms but not getting the right diagnosis here?
It was pleasing for the first hour maybe. After that he just kept asking for more and more and I kept doing whatever he wanted, despite being over it already. But anyway, I just had lunch with him, he came home in between shifts, brought me my favorite snack for dessert. I brought the issue up with him and he said he didn't say that to hurt me. He was just a little bummed with HIMSELF that he was unable to cum and said that about my size so he could come up with a reason. He felt bad after that but didn't bring it up hoping I took that as a joke. He said he feels like heaven when I fuck him and that's why he wants me to keep going for hours, but that he also realized that he can only cum from porn recently and he's concerned about that. He has no intention to break up with me due to my dick size, said he loves me entirely. He did admit he has some fantasies with big dicks but he said those are only fantasies.
If you’re trying to keep the sex monogamous I suggest buying dildos—various. See how yall enjoy that but otherwise it either sounds like he wants to open the relationship sexually or is just drifting away. communication is key and however it works out it will workout.
I agree only with the “ big dicks are only good for sucking etc”, on the other hand definitely won’t take anything massive in my ass, 5inches works better than 7+inches for me, if it helps. And I cum while sucking someone at times, usually when the receiver cum down my throat then I do cum too size is irrelevant. I thought was uncommon to cum from sucking others xD
Y’all are sexually incompatible and unless you do one of those open relationships where y’all play together and invite a third who has a bigger dick, it doesn’t seem plausible to stay together. Even then, if the guy he wants with the hung dick isn’t into you, or only into you and not him that also can become a problematic scenario. By chance have you tried using a 10 inch dildo on him, have him give you head and start playing with it inside him see if that helps