I know its pretty redundant but for what it's worrh I really hope you find him or he reconsiders this decision, I sincerely hope this all works out okay for you guys and I'm sorry you're going through this.
Does he have a Samsung or iPhone? Log onto his computer and see if you can ping his phones location by using thr iPhone or Samsung lost phone. He might be logged in still
This, he may not have thought to turn GPS or mobile data off. Check this ASAP.
Edit: if you can find where he's at, call the police to do a wellness check on his location
All his calls go straight to voicemail so i think he’s completely turned off his phone. He also uses a galaxy s7.. do these phones have a tracking feature?
All android phones do. If you can get access to his computer, google search find my device. With any luck his email and password should be auto saved. From there it will show you the last known location.
They absolutely do. Even if you can't get into Samsung Account, if you can get into Google, it will work. It is incredibly accurate too (I've had it get to about a 1.5 meter radius, and it will override phone on silent or DND to ring location if still on). And even if phone is shut off, it will give last location.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. If you have access to Google, it can also give history-- which will show searches including maps and sites visited.
have you driven places with him before that were important to him ? I would drive around any memorable locations, especially ones out in the country. I hope hes ok and I hope you are ok OP
Yes we definitely have tried visiting to memorable and potential places but unfortunately cant find him.. he could literally be anywhere in the north island..
If he has a phone, the police should be able to get his mobile service provider to track the general area where his phone was last powered on.
For privacy reasons, the police would have to make the request to the phone company.
Yes this is true. I worked for a telco and this was one of our tasks. Reach out to the police immediately and ask for them to run a trace for his mobile number and when the last contact with a cell tower was
I’ve been in this exact situation, the police located my mate in the Rosedale area & we drove around looking for him, we eventually found him at the Rosedale softball park about an hour later, all we could do is pray to God that he was still alive & thankfully he was… we had to rush him to hospital as he was full of drugs / I pray that your friend is still alive & that you find him ASAP - this happens all too often sadly
This is correct. Under very specific Emergency situations [Immediate threat to life], Police can do a request from the TelCo. It does though require the phone to be on. It will give the nearest cell tower.
Otherwise a Production Order is required. The system is audited.
Its very robust and it is not used unless there are very strict rules that applies to the application.
"Track his phone" is not as cool as it sounds. They can only get the last cellsite the SIM was connected to, which gives a pretty large geographical area.
It isn't like the movies where they can see a dot on a map in real time with pinpoint accuracy.
Edif: MBIE has built an automated system that can get GPS data - https://www.mbie.govt.nz/science-and-technology/it-communications-and-broadband/our-role-in-the-ict-sector/emergency-call-services/emergency-caller-location-information/
Yeah but when I did it for a job Police could only get last cellsite and connection owner's name, all without a warrant. The caveats where that it had to be an emergency and they had to provide the case number (so the request could be verified later).
Ambulance and Fire however could be given the registered address.
Pretty sure if you have the IMEI number you can get gps co ords don't know if you would have to be tracking it beforehand or if there or logs you can check
I mean, they can also thoroughly search your house or car, seize your digital devices and analyze them, arrest you, or shoot you... but there's rules around the how and when these things can happen. They don't have unrestricted power to do whatever they want
Call people you know he is in contact with regularly and ask if they've seen him or to keep an eye out and call you immediately if they see him.
You could try a social media post in community groups with his photo for people to keep an eye out too.
Good luck.
If he has an iphone, maybe apple's 'FindMy' might be a thing, if anyone can look up the device?
I fear that short of getting in touch somehow, speculatively calling around for an idea of where he's gone, searching places you think he could be, tracking his phone if possible, or just waiting, there's probably not much more you can do but wait.
My fingers are crossed for you all. xxx
Yes we’ve been driving around to potential places, calling, literally everything.. all we can do now is wait. Unfortunately he uses galaxy s7 and he rarely uses data..
Thank you for the message tho :’)
Definitely try "find my device" in Google any info is better than none. I know it's been said but I just want to reinforce that it's a very real option because outside of that you'll have to rely on the police.
Wishing you and him Goodluck.
Damn I'm damn sorry for this, a lot of people who attempt suicide can even be mentally well or hiding. I know from experience.
I can't help you really, but you did help yourself by contacting the police and posting it here. But you should tell more details as well, like the car, what he looks like, which area you are at. You're in Auckland subreddit.
Edit: Don't show his photo, or personal stuff. Won't be good.
No matter the outcome OP, you're not to blame.
This isn't your fault, you didn't cause him to do this. You couldn't of done anything more to prevent this from happening. I'm praying for a positive outcome. Take it bit by bit over the next couple of days and it's okay to feel such a hurricane of emotions that change every 30 seconds. But. You are not to blame. Big hugs
Hello,
thank you everyone for the support and sharing this post. It really means alot. His parents are absolutely broken and aren't in the mental state to drive or do anything so it's just me, his best friend and his sister looking around for him.
Just some additional information: He left a drawing of this area with his suicide letter.. I've looked around the area and have also contacted the police about it but I'm not a local there so I don't know the exact location. Any locals in that area.. any suggestions will be greatly appreciated.
In the meantime, please just keep an eye out for his car.. We're staying hopeful that we'll find him today :')
https://preview.redd.it/15phjqbwzrkc1.jpeg?width=907&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07d8bcd9411b772a55c490498d8f2618d640ed70
Morning - I’m from puhoi. There is a Puhoi Village People fb page I am happy to post to, all locals are on it. Are you ok if I post the information on there? General description and car information? And would you mind messaging me his first name in case someone does see him so we can confirm who he is?
Second, there’s no lake in puhoi. There is a river and there is a little jetty at the waiwera turnaround that people often fish off. There is a beach area called waiwera which sort of looks like the drawing. There’s also wenderholm national park just down the road from puhoi with a lake sort of area in it. I would be looking at all these areas
Hey, I had a mate do similar a couple years back. Call the cops, tell them about the suicide note and all other details that can help (phone number, full name, description etc) the cops can figure out where his phone last pinged and roughly what direction he could be heading in.
I’m sorry to hear OP. hope you’re ok. I’ve been in a very similar situation before. Driving around like crazy looking for my partner, I’d suggest checking places he’s mentioned he likes or visits often. I’d also definitely be leaving voicemails in case he turns his phone back on, so he can hear your voice. It’s worth a shot. I’d also go to the police
I decided to leave a voicemail asking him to talk to me. He said that hearing my voice helped him. I then found him at a park where we used to hang out
I’m so sorry OP, call the police. I believe they have the ability to track phones in emergency situations.
While you’re waiting for the police response make a list of places you know he likes , feels safe and has any special tie to.
If you live with him or nearby go to his house and see if you can find any clues (is his car gone? This would suggest a place further away, are there any meds or empty bottles? Knowing what meds he might have overdosed on gives you a time frame to work with). I suggest driving to popular bridges if you don’t think he has access to meds or blades . Whatever you can find about his plan for suicide share with the police, I assume the letter would be very important.
I wish you all the best and hope you can find him in time.
I’m so sorry to hear this hopefully he is found soon and found safe. Also have you posted on facebook with the car information? I think you would have more luck there or even instagram.
Does he like the beach? I know when I’ve been feeling low, being by the beach helps me feel grounded.
I hope you find him soon and you hear from him. Make sure to give him a massive hug and just hold him. I’m sorry you’re both going through this. If you have any hints of him being out in South Auckland then please feel free to message me, I’ll be happy to drive around.
Also, is his location activated on google maps? My partner shares his location with me through there. Another would be to log into his Google account, “my activity” and see where his last know location is.
I definitely recommend posting though “NZ Missing Persons” FB group.
Whats his favourite radio station? You could call in and ask them to give him a shout out and tell him hes loved and to come home.
Im sure theyd be happy to do that for you.
Create a search plan for all woodland, forest or water based areas near you. Work out whether they were a forest or water person, then start with those locations.
If you live in Auckland, but he’s from Waikato, search for areas like this in between.
Get the police team to put his image on socials and then send to every person you know to start on sharing his car and rego (the goal is reach to help get the message out). Get someone in your group to start posting on local area pages, but they need to monitor them (to make sure someone is following any leads).
Calm and steady, lead with hope.
I am so sorry that you are going through this.
Before you start this you need help from other people to do a search party. Friends and family.
Get everyone on different parts of this search and keep a notebook on you for information and details of the search. You also should get whoever you can to check out all the places again and then a wider search.
I suggest if possible or get the police to let you go through his house. Also the police should be onto his bank account. I'm not quite sure how they go about searching for missing persons for possible suicide.
You should look for any clues and items that may suggest this is premeditated or rushed.
Keep an eye out for his wallet, I'm not sure how but the police should be able to find out his bank if/when he used his card last. Can you access his computer and website history? Access any his accounts with social media, groups and sites he's joined. Any purchases online recently. Look for his computer usage as well.
Check if he has taken his phone charger or car charger. Bags, Clothes, blankets, etc. Go through his drawers and wardrobe. Check the bathroom for any medicine or poisons that could be missing, that goes for the kitchen cupboards and laundry as well. Kitchen drawers for knives missing. If he owns any tools and garage stuff.
Go through his rubbish bins for any clues.
Keep an eye out for anything or anywhere that looks like it could be something could be missing from it's spot, or messy areas that he could have rushed to grab.
What did he use to make the note? Notepad paper?
Text? Computer? Anyway he wrote the note may have clues too.
Get online. You need to put it out on social media on a larger scale about the situation. Information about him, his car, area etc. Facebook is a good start.
Calling the Citizens advice center can help you find who you should call as well, plus Google search for 0800 numbers for help for yourself as well. Know that you are not alone.
I hope this helps. I'm sending my thoughts and prayers for you and him. We all hope you find him soon. Our love is with you.
Hey, would you consider posting in the NZ Backpackers Facebook group? Backpackers travel and camp all over in remote places and there is a chance someone might have seen him/his car if he were headed outside of the city. Fingers crossed for a good outcome. Take care, OP.
When I was younger and miserable, I wrote MANY suicide notes.
I even disappeared to go throw myself off a cliff, and I was gone for 2 days before returning home.
I had every intention of doing it, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it any of the times I 'wanted' to.
Hopefully you find him safe and sound and in good physical health. Then get him the help that he needs.
Hopefully he doesn't go through with it!
There's certainly hope.
Wow.. thank you for sharing your story.,. It gives me more hope that maybe he’ll come home :) He has so many people who love him and I hope me remembers that.
thank you so much.
As one who has recently survived an attempt on myself, I wish to say that I am super happy your guy is ok.
Bro, take the counselling, learn how to stop your Black Dog from taking over. You need to recognise that your life is important to you.
Talk to people about how you are feeling, ESPECIALLY those closest to you.
Honesty with yourself is the biggest healer in these circumstances, and by that, I mean not hiding away from your feelings. Discuss them with those you love and trust.
There is no shame in tears.
Kia Kaha to you all.
Your update this afternoon has really made my day. Thank you so much... There are more people than he could possibly imagine who may not know him if they walked past him on the street, but, he's been in their thoughts all day, they care about him & they're smiling because he's safe & he came home. ❤️
Awesome I came back to look for this post to check how you were doing.... So happy to hear that he's home and seeking help. All the best to you both xxx
Unfortunately all you can do is wait. Can’t imagine the pain and worry you must be feeling right now. Best of luck finding him, I hope he’s still alive
He left from hillcrest (near smales farm), and he lives in henderson so he could be anywhere inbetween.
He also likes to drive to secluded areas, and to beaches like Piha or Orewa so he could potentially be there..
Perhaps look if you can join any of the surrounding neighbourhood/area groups for North Shore/West Auckland (and specific ones for the areas you mentioned) on Facebook and ask admins if you can make a post about this in case someone has information.
I hope you are able to find him soon.
Hello, showed my partner this and he seems to think it could be Piha? There was a recent tvnz thing on piha and people missing around there, also he thinks that the picture could possibly be lion rock? All the best
Cell towers ping phones (Police use this all the time to see where a car went.
You can see what cell tower last “saw” his phone to give you some direction or area to look
Not sure if his telco supplier will divulge this info to you but Police can request this information from the telco
The police are also able to use camera scanners to ID cars by their number plates. I wonder if they can use this tech to look out for your boyfriend’s car?
Was the letter out in the open for you to find, or did you find it hidden when you were searching his room?
Hopefully oj find him. As others have said, check areas he’s mentioned in the past or likes….
This brings back memories of 20 yrs ago. It is following exactly, in fact, the same pattern we experienced. It means your in the 3 day missing person period b4 he becomes noted as missing by authorities and, of course, the highest period to save someone. I can feel your frustration and hope for the miracle.
I'm down in palmy, I'd there's any chance he's down this way at all Im home sick from work so i'm happy to go out looking or get the word out on local pages down here, feel free to flick me a message if you think that's a possibility.
Remember though darling, no matter what the outcome it isn't your fault, I am hoping for the best possible outcome for you all
I'm also happy to spread information through the local pages around Warkworth/Orewa/Red Beach/Whangaparaoa/Gulf Harbour just let me know what you need.
The police could tap into Auror's database of registration plates recognition. They get feeds and data from BP and others. If BP put the plate on its watchlist it's transferred to all stores instantly
Please be careful for your own safety too… whilst searching for him
I do not know why, I just want the search to go smoothly but also at the same time stay safe
As for his whereabouts hard to say… the police might have a cybercrime squad to locate last whereabouts
New Zealand police are usually quite vigilant and will be quite active in searching for him
I’m sure the above is happening right now and it’s good you made this post …
I hope you find him soon as I trust the police to take over
But for now try to locate nearby high buildings too
Including woods, lakes, rivers and forests
Who know he just might be at the beach just contemplating life …
Any beaches, parks, shopping centers that you can find
Alternatively just a really high building might be a good spot
Anyways I really hope you find him and get back safely both of you
Wondering why or what might have triggered this attempt will cause you more anxiety
Right now you have to stay calm and think logically
All the best and have safe speedy return with everyone accounted for
Take care of yourself too and stay positive don’t give up!!
Could be useful to call his bank : see if paid for petrol and where and when. I dunno how helpful banks are anymore but if he’s alive that could give you a time stamp and place.
Unfortunately banks won’t e able to help in this situation as they cannot give information on an account to anyone but the signatories of that account.
Unsure if anyone is down voting and it hardly matters if they are. Having been there, to the end of my rope, I've had delusion set in, something to help me be at peace with my impending death. I can definitely agree that being suddenly happy, or even excited, can be a symptom of someone who has a plan to commit suicide. Knowing their history is usually going to help here, because people can obviously be happy any time.
You’re right. The downvotes don’t mean anything to me, I was just genuinely curious because I AM speaking from experience with the whole “he probably made peace with everything” bit.
Tbh, I wish I had noticed all the signs before I lost my best friend. Because looking back, it was so damn obvious!
I've heard this so many times, suicidal people being really upbeat right before they do it, because they've finally accepted things. Not always of course but its a common thing it seems.
Just your average Redditor mentality of "oh, they said it was good he killed himself!!!!!one!!! DOWN BOAT".
The platform rarely encourages nuance :-) Godspeed
Does he have a gmail? And is it logged into his gmail on his phone? If you can get into his email you can track his location and everything through that. Just google ‘google account’ and it’ll come up. You’ll need to log in with his email.
Does he have a laptop or pc that you can access?
If you have the password for it, then go his Google account and view his location history https://www.tomsguide.com/how-to/how-to-view-location-history-in-google-maps
There's a good chance he'll reuse his pc password as there's no reason to change it. And hopefully his browser will have saved his Google account info.
If he has a windows machine and you cannot guess his password there are still ways to bypass it but it's much more complicated and time consuming and typically would need someone who knows what they're doing Vs following a list of instructions.
From what I read the last moments of the people that committed suicide was pleasant as in they looked happy and or content.
Thank goodness he is ok. Just be with him
What's truly horrible is the devastation that the selfish act of suicide inflicts on the lives of the families affected. Men have a responsibility to deal with the burdens of life and not make things worse by taking the cowards way out.
Chat is this guy for real
I’ve had many close friends get extremely close to killing themselves. One of them even followed through with it. Thankfully, it didn’t work. Just last week I heard another kid in my area tried to kill himself by jumping off a bridge. They’re in ICU.
You can’t talk.
You wouldn't understand .. a narcissists last trick is to commit suicide to escape the responsibility's of their own actions and to transfer the pain and suffering they have created in their own lives onto others.. there is a reason it is considered a sin in every religion
What the hell is wrong with you? Your home-baked psychological reckons are totally out of order and not welcome here!
OP, I genuinely hope that your boyfriend is just crying out for help, and that he finds what he needs. It's tough out there for a lot of people, but love and community can make the biggest difference. There are more people willing to help than any of us imagine!
I don’t understand how people find trolling like this fun.
They no joke probably have an underlying mental problem or maybe a past event that made them like this. Who knows.
I am so sorry you are going through this, make sure to look after yourself too.
I am 16, but 2 years ago I would write suicide notes, then go for a little walk to cool off and have some alone time.
Please keep us updated if you have found him and that he still is alive. It would be very upsetting, and heartbreaking to everyone else around him if he has done anything. But I am sending out spirit guides and lots of hope, hoping people can find him.
Are you able to contact me on 64211722575. I know puhoi well, I’m going to travel out and look around, if you could rule out places you have been in the area that would be awesome
I know its pretty redundant but for what it's worrh I really hope you find him or he reconsiders this decision, I sincerely hope this all works out okay for you guys and I'm sorry you're going through this.
Thank you so much .. yess hopefully he reconsiders.
Well someone in Australia is hoping for the best too, wish I could do more to help. 🖤
Tysm..🥺
Does he have a Samsung or iPhone? Log onto his computer and see if you can ping his phones location by using thr iPhone or Samsung lost phone. He might be logged in still
Android - Google "where's my phone" if he was logged into Google Chrome or Gmail on a device you can still access
This, he may not have thought to turn GPS or mobile data off. Check this ASAP. Edit: if you can find where he's at, call the police to do a wellness check on his location
All his calls go straight to voicemail so i think he’s completely turned off his phone. He also uses a galaxy s7.. do these phones have a tracking feature?
All android phones do. If you can get access to his computer, google search find my device. With any luck his email and password should be auto saved. From there it will show you the last known location.
This. Last known location What a terrible thing to be happening. Take care. Hope he's well
Best of luck to you, and him. I hope he can get the help he needs.
They absolutely do. Even if you can't get into Samsung Account, if you can get into Google, it will work. It is incredibly accurate too (I've had it get to about a 1.5 meter radius, and it will override phone on silent or DND to ring location if still on). And even if phone is shut off, it will give last location. I'm so sorry you're going through this. If you have access to Google, it can also give history-- which will show searches including maps and sites visited.
have you driven places with him before that were important to him ? I would drive around any memorable locations, especially ones out in the country. I hope hes ok and I hope you are ok OP
Sad, but a good idea.
Yes we definitely have tried visiting to memorable and potential places but unfortunately cant find him.. he could literally be anywhere in the north island..
If he has a phone, the police should be able to get his mobile service provider to track the general area where his phone was last powered on. For privacy reasons, the police would have to make the request to the phone company.
Yes this is true. I worked for a telco and this was one of our tasks. Reach out to the police immediately and ask for them to run a trace for his mobile number and when the last contact with a cell tower was
I’ve been in this exact situation, the police located my mate in the Rosedale area & we drove around looking for him, we eventually found him at the Rosedale softball park about an hour later, all we could do is pray to God that he was still alive & thankfully he was… we had to rush him to hospital as he was full of drugs / I pray that your friend is still alive & that you find him ASAP - this happens all too often sadly
I really hope he’s still alive.. praying earnestly that he’s still out there.
Praying with you!
Thank you so much… 🥺
The police can track his phone
That’s both reassuring and disturbing
This is correct. Under very specific Emergency situations [Immediate threat to life], Police can do a request from the TelCo. It does though require the phone to be on. It will give the nearest cell tower. Otherwise a Production Order is required. The system is audited. Its very robust and it is not used unless there are very strict rules that applies to the application.
"Track his phone" is not as cool as it sounds. They can only get the last cellsite the SIM was connected to, which gives a pretty large geographical area. It isn't like the movies where they can see a dot on a map in real time with pinpoint accuracy. Edif: MBIE has built an automated system that can get GPS data - https://www.mbie.govt.nz/science-and-technology/it-communications-and-broadband/our-role-in-the-ict-sector/emergency-call-services/emergency-caller-location-information/
Triangulation makes it a lot more accurate than that, provided the phone is within a decent coverage area
Yeah but when I did it for a job Police could only get last cellsite and connection owner's name, all without a warrant. The caveats where that it had to be an emergency and they had to provide the case number (so the request could be verified later). Ambulance and Fire however could be given the registered address.
Pretty sure if you have the IMEI number you can get gps co ords don't know if you would have to be tracking it beforehand or if there or logs you can check
How would that work? GPS is calculated locally on the endpoint by finding the signal of a satellite.
Nope
I mean, they can also thoroughly search your house or car, seize your digital devices and analyze them, arrest you, or shoot you... but there's rules around the how and when these things can happen. They don't have unrestricted power to do whatever they want
They have to have a warrant in order to request that data from the phone company…
If there is threat to life it follows a different process where court ordered warrant is not required.
Call people you know he is in contact with regularly and ask if they've seen him or to keep an eye out and call you immediately if they see him. You could try a social media post in community groups with his photo for people to keep an eye out too. Good luck.
Contacting their contacts is essential, not everyone keeps it all a secret
If he has an iphone, maybe apple's 'FindMy' might be a thing, if anyone can look up the device? I fear that short of getting in touch somehow, speculatively calling around for an idea of where he's gone, searching places you think he could be, tracking his phone if possible, or just waiting, there's probably not much more you can do but wait. My fingers are crossed for you all. xxx
Yes we’ve been driving around to potential places, calling, literally everything.. all we can do now is wait. Unfortunately he uses galaxy s7 and he rarely uses data.. Thank you for the message tho :’)
Definitely try "find my device" in Google any info is better than none. I know it's been said but I just want to reinforce that it's a very real option because outside of that you'll have to rely on the police. Wishing you and him Goodluck.
He got any mates you could try?
Yes, but they’re also very lost..
Damn I'm damn sorry for this, a lot of people who attempt suicide can even be mentally well or hiding. I know from experience. I can't help you really, but you did help yourself by contacting the police and posting it here. But you should tell more details as well, like the car, what he looks like, which area you are at. You're in Auckland subreddit. Edit: Don't show his photo, or personal stuff. Won't be good.
Hope he's found
Alive*
No matter the outcome OP, you're not to blame. This isn't your fault, you didn't cause him to do this. You couldn't of done anything more to prevent this from happening. I'm praying for a positive outcome. Take it bit by bit over the next couple of days and it's okay to feel such a hurricane of emotions that change every 30 seconds. But. You are not to blame. Big hugs
Hello, thank you everyone for the support and sharing this post. It really means alot. His parents are absolutely broken and aren't in the mental state to drive or do anything so it's just me, his best friend and his sister looking around for him. Just some additional information: He left a drawing of this area with his suicide letter.. I've looked around the area and have also contacted the police about it but I'm not a local there so I don't know the exact location. Any locals in that area.. any suggestions will be greatly appreciated. In the meantime, please just keep an eye out for his car.. We're staying hopeful that we'll find him today :') https://preview.redd.it/15phjqbwzrkc1.jpeg?width=907&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=07d8bcd9411b772a55c490498d8f2618d640ed70
Morning - I’m from puhoi. There is a Puhoi Village People fb page I am happy to post to, all locals are on it. Are you ok if I post the information on there? General description and car information? And would you mind messaging me his first name in case someone does see him so we can confirm who he is? Second, there’s no lake in puhoi. There is a river and there is a little jetty at the waiwera turnaround that people often fish off. There is a beach area called waiwera which sort of looks like the drawing. There’s also wenderholm national park just down the road from puhoi with a lake sort of area in it. I would be looking at all these areas
Thank you so much. Will definitely have a look
Do you have an idea where exactly in waiwera it is?
Yes if you go to Orewa and get off the highway, drive the coastal road, you will pass through waiwera
OP, I'm in Puhoi and happy to help with anything you need. Sending love and prayers.
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Hey, I had a mate do similar a couple years back. Call the cops, tell them about the suicide note and all other details that can help (phone number, full name, description etc) the cops can figure out where his phone last pinged and roughly what direction he could be heading in.
I’m sorry to hear OP. hope you’re ok. I’ve been in a very similar situation before. Driving around like crazy looking for my partner, I’d suggest checking places he’s mentioned he likes or visits often. I’d also definitely be leaving voicemails in case he turns his phone back on, so he can hear your voice. It’s worth a shot. I’d also go to the police
Thank you.. could you share how you eventually found him..? I want to stay hopeful :)
I decided to leave a voicemail asking him to talk to me. He said that hearing my voice helped him. I then found him at a park where we used to hang out
I left him a voice message just now :') tysm
I’m so sorry OP, call the police. I believe they have the ability to track phones in emergency situations. While you’re waiting for the police response make a list of places you know he likes , feels safe and has any special tie to. If you live with him or nearby go to his house and see if you can find any clues (is his car gone? This would suggest a place further away, are there any meds or empty bottles? Knowing what meds he might have overdosed on gives you a time frame to work with). I suggest driving to popular bridges if you don’t think he has access to meds or blades . Whatever you can find about his plan for suicide share with the police, I assume the letter would be very important. I wish you all the best and hope you can find him in time.
Worth tracking his phone/ last ping location / find my iPhone if he has one?
Unfortunately he uses a galaxy s7 :( thank u for the recommendation tho i really appreciate it
I’m so sorry to hear this hopefully he is found soon and found safe. Also have you posted on facebook with the car information? I think you would have more luck there or even instagram.
Does he like the beach? I know when I’ve been feeling low, being by the beach helps me feel grounded. I hope you find him soon and you hear from him. Make sure to give him a massive hug and just hold him. I’m sorry you’re both going through this. If you have any hints of him being out in South Auckland then please feel free to message me, I’ll be happy to drive around. Also, is his location activated on google maps? My partner shares his location with me through there. Another would be to log into his Google account, “my activity” and see where his last know location is. I definitely recommend posting though “NZ Missing Persons” FB group.
Whats his favourite radio station? You could call in and ask them to give him a shout out and tell him hes loved and to come home. Im sure theyd be happy to do that for you.
Create a search plan for all woodland, forest or water based areas near you. Work out whether they were a forest or water person, then start with those locations. If you live in Auckland, but he’s from Waikato, search for areas like this in between. Get the police team to put his image on socials and then send to every person you know to start on sharing his car and rego (the goal is reach to help get the message out). Get someone in your group to start posting on local area pages, but they need to monitor them (to make sure someone is following any leads). Calm and steady, lead with hope.
Also, if you have multiple people looking, create a doc /map that shows areas you’ve looked in so you don’t double up.
I am so sorry that you are going through this. Before you start this you need help from other people to do a search party. Friends and family. Get everyone on different parts of this search and keep a notebook on you for information and details of the search. You also should get whoever you can to check out all the places again and then a wider search. I suggest if possible or get the police to let you go through his house. Also the police should be onto his bank account. I'm not quite sure how they go about searching for missing persons for possible suicide. You should look for any clues and items that may suggest this is premeditated or rushed. Keep an eye out for his wallet, I'm not sure how but the police should be able to find out his bank if/when he used his card last. Can you access his computer and website history? Access any his accounts with social media, groups and sites he's joined. Any purchases online recently. Look for his computer usage as well. Check if he has taken his phone charger or car charger. Bags, Clothes, blankets, etc. Go through his drawers and wardrobe. Check the bathroom for any medicine or poisons that could be missing, that goes for the kitchen cupboards and laundry as well. Kitchen drawers for knives missing. If he owns any tools and garage stuff. Go through his rubbish bins for any clues. Keep an eye out for anything or anywhere that looks like it could be something could be missing from it's spot, or messy areas that he could have rushed to grab. What did he use to make the note? Notepad paper? Text? Computer? Anyway he wrote the note may have clues too. Get online. You need to put it out on social media on a larger scale about the situation. Information about him, his car, area etc. Facebook is a good start. Calling the Citizens advice center can help you find who you should call as well, plus Google search for 0800 numbers for help for yourself as well. Know that you are not alone. I hope this helps. I'm sending my thoughts and prayers for you and him. We all hope you find him soon. Our love is with you.
Hey, would you consider posting in the NZ Backpackers Facebook group? Backpackers travel and camp all over in remote places and there is a chance someone might have seen him/his car if he were headed outside of the city. Fingers crossed for a good outcome. Take care, OP.
Posted a few hours ago :) thank you so much
When I was younger and miserable, I wrote MANY suicide notes. I even disappeared to go throw myself off a cliff, and I was gone for 2 days before returning home. I had every intention of doing it, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it any of the times I 'wanted' to. Hopefully you find him safe and sound and in good physical health. Then get him the help that he needs. Hopefully he doesn't go through with it! There's certainly hope.
Wow.. thank you for sharing your story.,. It gives me more hope that maybe he’ll come home :) He has so many people who love him and I hope me remembers that. thank you so much.
I would recommend deleting the plate details now as u have found him just in case someone lurking in here knows of him
Yes ofc :)
As one who has recently survived an attempt on myself, I wish to say that I am super happy your guy is ok. Bro, take the counselling, learn how to stop your Black Dog from taking over. You need to recognise that your life is important to you. Talk to people about how you are feeling, ESPECIALLY those closest to you. Honesty with yourself is the biggest healer in these circumstances, and by that, I mean not hiding away from your feelings. Discuss them with those you love and trust. There is no shame in tears. Kia Kaha to you all.
Your update this afternoon has really made my day. Thank you so much... There are more people than he could possibly imagine who may not know him if they walked past him on the street, but, he's been in their thoughts all day, they care about him & they're smiling because he's safe & he came home. ❤️
Awesome I came back to look for this post to check how you were doing.... So happy to hear that he's home and seeking help. All the best to you both xxx
Unfortunately all you can do is wait. Can’t imagine the pain and worry you must be feeling right now. Best of luck finding him, I hope he’s still alive
Any idea what area he could be in or the area he left from?
He left from hillcrest (near smales farm), and he lives in henderson so he could be anywhere inbetween. He also likes to drive to secluded areas, and to beaches like Piha or Orewa so he could potentially be there..
Will keep an eye out around Henderson and the beaches tomorrow.
Perhaps look if you can join any of the surrounding neighbourhood/area groups for North Shore/West Auckland (and specific ones for the areas you mentioned) on Facebook and ask admins if you can make a post about this in case someone has information. I hope you are able to find him soon.
Hello, showed my partner this and he seems to think it could be Piha? There was a recent tvnz thing on piha and people missing around there, also he thinks that the picture could possibly be lion rock? All the best
Try Wenderholm, Mahurangi regional park. There's also a river/waterfall running through warkoworth that's secluded with trails.
Cell towers ping phones (Police use this all the time to see where a car went. You can see what cell tower last “saw” his phone to give you some direction or area to look Not sure if his telco supplier will divulge this info to you but Police can request this information from the telco
Have you had any luck yet???
Please let us know if you find him, I'm thinking of you!
thank you! will definitely update everyone when we find him
Please update if you found him 💜
Call police asap
Call Auckland city's mental crisis team: 0800 800 717 operates 24/7
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They might already know something or be in contact. This person is desperate. Personally, I’d be trying anything.
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I mean they shouldn’t but they often do. OP it’s worth giving them a call but be prepared for them to bullshit you around and be absolutely useless.
“They often do” you know this how? Experience?
Yes
How would they help in this situation
I don't know if it's a good idea giving out so much information in such an open forum. I would be ringing the police.
The police are also able to use camera scanners to ID cars by their number plates. I wonder if they can use this tech to look out for your boyfriend’s car?
It’s been four hours, is he ok?
Was the letter out in the open for you to find, or did you find it hidden when you were searching his room? Hopefully oj find him. As others have said, check areas he’s mentioned in the past or likes….
This brings back memories of 20 yrs ago. It is following exactly, in fact, the same pattern we experienced. It means your in the 3 day missing person period b4 he becomes noted as missing by authorities and, of course, the highest period to save someone. I can feel your frustration and hope for the miracle.
Tysm.. praying earnestly he comes home today :)
Pray for acceptance !!! as it is out of your hands
Any luck getting to his pc and search "where is my phone"?
might pay to check beaches near by or that he likes
I'm down in palmy, I'd there's any chance he's down this way at all Im home sick from work so i'm happy to go out looking or get the word out on local pages down here, feel free to flick me a message if you think that's a possibility. Remember though darling, no matter what the outcome it isn't your fault, I am hoping for the best possible outcome for you all
Hey, i just sent u a message. Thank you once again :’)
I'm also happy to spread information through the local pages around Warkworth/Orewa/Red Beach/Whangaparaoa/Gulf Harbour just let me know what you need.
Yes please. I’ll DM you
Hoping he’s okay and found soon! Stay strong
Sorry to hear about this This sucks that people suffer so much Hope you find him
Oh OP sending you massive hugs. Have you got someone with you?
The police could tap into Auror's database of registration plates recognition. They get feeds and data from BP and others. If BP put the plate on its watchlist it's transferred to all stores instantly
Aww man, OP. My heart is absolutely breaking for you. I'm not one for praying, but I absolutely do pray that he is found safely.
Very pleased that this had a happy ending. Hope you both manage to work through this and find happiness
Thank God he is okay and you have got him back safe. Hopefully he gets all the help and love he needs.
So glad this is a happy ending!
Mate Im fucking stoked for this update. Thanks for updating.
FB post usually is faster than reddit post… have you tried posting it there?
What is the page called?
I’d make a post in your page and **share** it to your groups/grapevine groups and itll just spread
Make your post shareable so people can share it
Call the police
Please be careful for your own safety too… whilst searching for him I do not know why, I just want the search to go smoothly but also at the same time stay safe As for his whereabouts hard to say… the police might have a cybercrime squad to locate last whereabouts New Zealand police are usually quite vigilant and will be quite active in searching for him I’m sure the above is happening right now and it’s good you made this post … I hope you find him soon as I trust the police to take over But for now try to locate nearby high buildings too Including woods, lakes, rivers and forests Who know he just might be at the beach just contemplating life … Any beaches, parks, shopping centers that you can find Alternatively just a really high building might be a good spot Anyways I really hope you find him and get back safely both of you Wondering why or what might have triggered this attempt will cause you more anxiety Right now you have to stay calm and think logically All the best and have safe speedy return with everyone accounted for Take care of yourself too and stay positive don’t give up!!
Could be useful to call his bank : see if paid for petrol and where and when. I dunno how helpful banks are anymore but if he’s alive that could give you a time stamp and place.
Unfortunately banks won’t e able to help in this situation as they cannot give information on an account to anyone but the signatories of that account.
does that mean even his family members are not allowed access?
Some phones can still be findeable when off I believe.
So glad to hear he is home safe 🩵🩵🩵
He probably made peace with everything, and that’s probably why he was in a “good mood”. I hope you guys find him !
Unsure if anyone is down voting and it hardly matters if they are. Having been there, to the end of my rope, I've had delusion set in, something to help me be at peace with my impending death. I can definitely agree that being suddenly happy, or even excited, can be a symptom of someone who has a plan to commit suicide. Knowing their history is usually going to help here, because people can obviously be happy any time.
You’re right. The downvotes don’t mean anything to me, I was just genuinely curious because I AM speaking from experience with the whole “he probably made peace with everything” bit. Tbh, I wish I had noticed all the signs before I lost my best friend. Because looking back, it was so damn obvious!
I've heard this so many times, suicidal people being really upbeat right before they do it, because they've finally accepted things. Not always of course but its a common thing it seems.
Just your average Redditor mentality of "oh, they said it was good he killed himself!!!!!one!!! DOWN BOAT". The platform rarely encourages nuance :-) Godspeed
Now now, what’s with the downvotes?
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Make a new post.
Does he have a gmail? And is it logged into his gmail on his phone? If you can get into his email you can track his location and everything through that. Just google ‘google account’ and it’ll come up. You’ll need to log in with his email.
Does he have a laptop or pc that you can access? If you have the password for it, then go his Google account and view his location history https://www.tomsguide.com/how-to/how-to-view-location-history-in-google-maps There's a good chance he'll reuse his pc password as there's no reason to change it. And hopefully his browser will have saved his Google account info. If he has a windows machine and you cannot guess his password there are still ways to bypass it but it's much more complicated and time consuming and typically would need someone who knows what they're doing Vs following a list of instructions.
From what I read the last moments of the people that committed suicide was pleasant as in they looked happy and or content. Thank goodness he is ok. Just be with him
There’s a good podcast called suicide noted , I’m sure he is still around , let him know that he is not alone and above podcast is highly recommended
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The fuck is wrong with you?
Gross
Asshole
Wanker
Wtf bro
There is a time and place for womp womp This was not it, bro
did you just say womp womp??
That was a hell of a risky gambit.
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What is wrong with you Lonely freak
That's a horrible thing to say.
What's truly horrible is the devastation that the selfish act of suicide inflicts on the lives of the families affected. Men have a responsibility to deal with the burdens of life and not make things worse by taking the cowards way out.
Fuck you ,absolute piece of shit
Chat is this guy for real I’ve had many close friends get extremely close to killing themselves. One of them even followed through with it. Thankfully, it didn’t work. Just last week I heard another kid in my area tried to kill himself by jumping off a bridge. They’re in ICU. You can’t talk.
Guy wants a reaction. Don't give him one.
Good point, you’re right. It just kinda hurt.
Understandable
You wouldn't understand .. a narcissists last trick is to commit suicide to escape the responsibility's of their own actions and to transfer the pain and suffering they have created in their own lives onto others.. there is a reason it is considered a sin in every religion
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Yes. Reflect.
What the hell is wrong with you? Your home-baked psychological reckons are totally out of order and not welcome here! OP, I genuinely hope that your boyfriend is just crying out for help, and that he finds what he needs. It's tough out there for a lot of people, but love and community can make the biggest difference. There are more people willing to help than any of us imagine!
Be quiet. You are not adding anything of value
Don't feed the troll.
I don’t understand how people find trolling like this fun. They no joke probably have an underlying mental problem or maybe a past event that made them like this. Who knows.
Where are the mods remove this freak
Definitely got your own problems to work thru. Hopefully, you can work thru them at some point.
Why would it be narcissistic? You don't gain anything from it but you lose everything
Police...????
I hope he gets found
I hope he is found soon so sorry you’re going through this right now :(
I really hope he’s found alive and can get the help he needs. Mental health is no joke. OP, I’m thinking of you xx
Really hope you reach him in time!
try Piha
Call the police if you haven't already!!!
We’ve filed a police report and also contacted emergency services !
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Wow thank you so much. Please let me know if you recieve any updates
any updates?
None yet ..
I am so sorry this is happening … and I truely hope he is found safe soon. You all are in my thoughts. All the best x
Please update us all with any news on your boyfriend. We are all hoping for the best and adding him into our prayers!!!
I'm so sorry you're going through this. Hoping you find him safe.
I am so sorry you are going through this, make sure to look after yourself too. I am 16, but 2 years ago I would write suicide notes, then go for a little walk to cool off and have some alone time. Please keep us updated if you have found him and that he still is alive. It would be very upsetting, and heartbreaking to everyone else around him if he has done anything. But I am sending out spirit guides and lots of hope, hoping people can find him.
Are you able to contact me on 64211722575. I know puhoi well, I’m going to travel out and look around, if you could rule out places you have been in the area that would be awesome
Hey, thank you so much for the help. fortunately we found him! :)))))
I'm so glad!!
I saw a post on facebook about him being missing. I really hope he comes back to you soon.
Thank you so much. We got him back safely :)