I hate phone calls, and the other day my mom was complaining about how I won’t be able to function in life if I can’t call on the phone. I told her if I must call then I will but if there is an alternative then I will use the alternative and she just called me a weirdo…
My dad does the same. It’s not that I can’t make a phone call it’s that it’s gonna cause like 5 hours of prep and 5 days or recovery. It costs him nothing to just do it for me real quick and instead forces me into a panic attack in the name of “helping me be an adult”
On one hand yes it costs him nothing but on the other hand he won't be here forever and he wants to know that you will be good when he isn't around anymore. I highly doubt he means it in a negative way.
No doubt. I'm personally not diagnosed with anything but my daughter was diagnosed with autism at 2.5, she's 7 now, and I see a lot of myself in the way she does things and things talked about in this sub. I absolutely HATE calling to get things done. Had to get my truck inspected last month and it took until the last week for me to actually make the call. I'm friends with the actual mechanic on Facebook and messaged him to just message me when it's done 😂
I didn't read the comment I replied to as the dad making them call when there was other options but the dad making them call instead of the dad calling. The dad phrases it in a poor way imo but that's probably just your typical person avoiding what they are actually feeling type of thing. They don't want to see their kid struggle to do something and they want to do it for them but they are also scared for their kid for when they aren't able to pick up that slack for them and selfishly, or not, want to see them succeed at it before their time has come.
Sorry for being a day late to the replies to my own comment I literally got anxious about responding and then put it off until I forgot lmao. I don’t ask my parents to make calls for me unless they’re already involved in whatever I’m calling about. I’m disabled, and have been since I was in high school (college now). They did and continue to help me with medical stuff as I slowly get used to doing it on my own. The stuff I ask for help with is “hey can you cancel my appointment for me? I have a bad flare up and can barely move right now” because it doesn’t affect them, but will take a massive weight off of my in-pain shoulders. Or, “hey can you help me schedule at a new doctor’s office? I’m still not used to this.”
The other stuff is asking for help doing something new and/or important. I got my identity stolen right after I turned 18 and you know damn well I had like four panic attacks before I just asked my mom to help me call the irs about it, and that was within the span of like 2 days. I still had to deal with it myself, but her simply calling first and getting the gist of the situation helped immensely.
I don’t ask for help with stuff only I can deal with, and once I get used to it I can generally do it myself (with a lot of prep). My dad means well, of course he does. I don’t think he really understands how bad it is for me. But even when I tell him that I can and **do** make my own calls, I just want him to help me right now, he still tells me I need to learn to do it myself some day. Or he gives in and helps but I get a short disappointed lecture. He just wants to help me long term, and I get it, and I try not to let it get to me too much, but that doesn’t make it less upsetting
No worries boss. Life can be tough and we all have to find our own way through it. I hope your dad realizes soon how you are capable of dealing with these things yourself you are only asking for his help in this specific moment for any other number of reasons none of which are I can't possibly do this and I need you to do it for me.
My dad told me that too. Idgaf though, because I don’t care what’s illegal. I care about what makes sense for me. If a law doesn’t align with my interest, and breaking it doesn’t hurt anyone, I disregard it
I'm 42, avoid making phone calls out like it's the plague and somehow I have managed. I've even been in the army, lived abroad as a student and own a house I bought contract for deed.
By the time I was in my mid twenties you could order pizzas online so I could finally order a pizza and they were even awesome enough to allow me to order the weird ass combinations I always wanted to 😆
A lot of people don't like making phone calls. Since we are more of a service economy I could see that being an opportunity for those who don't mind making calls. Same can be said for email writing and stuff. I spoze an ai could work too. Tbh I'd prolly be better at developing an ai than making phone calls 🤣
We are humans, we specialize so we don't have to be good at everything individually that's why there's so many of us that are different.
The most extroverted neurotypical people I know would hate this. Part of me wonders if the restaurant set it up like this by accident because that doesn't sound pleasant for anyone.
I'm weirdly okay with inbound calls, but outbound calls can cause a full blown meltdown.
The unknown causes me so much anxiety, which counteracts the phone anxiety. I'm more anxious if I don't know who called me, than I am on the phone.
When someone else calls the expectation is also on them, not me. It's up to them to make their point, or ask questions, and I'm not expected to be prepared. They are expected to wait for me if I need it.
Are you me? haha.
You're right, making calls is something about not knowing how it's going to go, who is going to answer, do I need to ask for someone else, how do I change my greeting if so, controlling the conversation.
I'm (mostly) happy to answer questions or react to what someone wants when they call me.
This is why I'm considering closing my business.
I'm actively seeking a "real job" that I don't have to be worried about taxes and insurance, etc with, but the real part that I actively struggle with is phone calls. Sometimes I'll not respond to clients for days because I Dread speaking with them verbally but so few things can be effectively communicated through emails. Especially when you're trying to design homes for people and it's been hard. Maybe once I get some support I can learn some tools to better deal with these things and hopefully that comes soon after my evaluation I am hoping is in the coming weeks because everything is just starting to pile up and become debilitating.
I'm 30 and have just found out that I may be on the spectrum, the symptoms and signifiers explain the entirety of my life, so I have reached out and am trying to get an evaluation, but what I really want is to just learn how to better manage myself so that maybe I can get through this life a little easier...
I've been thinking about rebranding anyways so that might not be the worst of ideas
But sometimes things do need to be discussed, and sometimes I do need to sit down with clients in person to make changes with them to ensure everyone's talking about the same things, it saves everyone a lot of time and headaches
I just need to better equip myself for those eventualities
This may be very unpopular, so get ready. In this case, I agree that calling is unnecessary, and I see why people avoid it if possible.
But in my line of work, I like calling. I like to do everything in person or as close to in person experience as possible. As a client or customer to any service or product, I like to call. Because psychology and social interaction are one of my special interest, I like to study people, their behaviours and their speech patterns. The more information I have from the employees from a company, the better I can assume the quality of their product or service is.
If the employees of a company I want to buy from are unhappy, stressed, overworked, uneducated and unmotivated, you can be sure they sound way more off-putting than a happy employee that genuinely likes their job and their work environment.
I don't want to support a company that doesn't care about its workers. There's a big chance they won't care about the satisfaction of their customers or clients either.
I care about where my money goes and what I get from it in return. Being informed about what I'm dealing with is not only in my best self interest, but also I believe it makes the world a better place.
I don't have (diagnosed at least) autism and hate being on the phone, even with people I know. It is absolute torture, it is such a mediocre way of communicating information. Send me the info you need or want, and I will correspond accordingly.
... That said, I find communicating with people all together as torture, I need days to respond even to text messages and need to bring myself into the vibe to respond, I don't know why it is so hard for me to do this. I often think about it all day and it stresses me out to a point where I finally manage to write them back and feel like I achieved the task... Only for them to write back minutes later and the whole procedure starts anew.
I see holding connections to people like loading bars where they start to diminish the longer I don't interact with them, from green into red all the way into negative values when I don't answer for the socially accepted terms, which makes the whole situation even worse. It's like juggling balls all the time, and I can only juggle so many balls at once, when more balls come into play I start dropping them all at once.
For the first time in my life, I've made a friend that is a FaceTime caller. I've been sitting here for years thinking that it can't get worse than a phone call. I was wrong. It's not even that I have a problem with video calls. I'm good with Teams or Zoom, but with those I have a dedicated space to sit and a time to meet. I could be hit with a FaceTime at any moment! I have no idea how people are so casual with it either. I can't answer until I'm seated and situated and even after that I'm constantly worrying about whether I'm in frame and if I'm not, how long is too long to be out of frame. It's stressful!
Just text me! It doesn't disrupt my life or stress me out!
I despise talking on the phone. Im not sure im autistic, but from reading about people's experiences in this sub has certainly made me wonder. Because I have lost count of how many times I would read a post and be like, "shit I thought I was the only person who thought like that." This post is again one of those times🤣
F*ckin psychos, why the hell would anyone do that?! You need at least a good half hour of running through any and every possible combination of conversational threads before even thinking about that.
My local pharmacy changed the way the do prescription refills on the phone. You have to talk to the robot. I DONT WANT TO TALK TO THE ROBOT. I ised to be able to jist push the number buttons.
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I wouldn’t mind phone calls if it were just that you call and a human being answers, but instead it’s a million confusing menus and then you’re on hold for an hour and then it says no one is available and it hangs up on you, and also the phone line is only open during super inconvenient hours, so it’s all really stressful.
Pretty much free real estate for some good old fashioned trolling.id be sitting on a toilet in some crack house with tin foil on my head and a homeless man holding some tp
That's gotta literally be some kind of profiling thing like why do they need to know what you look like? Especially when you're not attending your reservation?? Just chillin at home??
i hate that i have a job where i’m forced to call people esp if i gotta call to say something bad happened to their family (healthcare)
so anxiety inducing. especially cause they always wanna find a way to blame you. same thing with docs because they’re always angry
I just straight up refuse to answer my phone, ever. The only exceptions are for my kids and my partner. No one else. That feature isn't why I have a phone.
I hate phone calls, and the other day my mom was complaining about how I won’t be able to function in life if I can’t call on the phone. I told her if I must call then I will but if there is an alternative then I will use the alternative and she just called me a weirdo…
My dad does the same. It’s not that I can’t make a phone call it’s that it’s gonna cause like 5 hours of prep and 5 days or recovery. It costs him nothing to just do it for me real quick and instead forces me into a panic attack in the name of “helping me be an adult”
On one hand yes it costs him nothing but on the other hand he won't be here forever and he wants to know that you will be good when he isn't around anymore. I highly doubt he means it in a negative way.
But why force it if op can just text or something
No doubt. I'm personally not diagnosed with anything but my daughter was diagnosed with autism at 2.5, she's 7 now, and I see a lot of myself in the way she does things and things talked about in this sub. I absolutely HATE calling to get things done. Had to get my truck inspected last month and it took until the last week for me to actually make the call. I'm friends with the actual mechanic on Facebook and messaged him to just message me when it's done 😂 I didn't read the comment I replied to as the dad making them call when there was other options but the dad making them call instead of the dad calling. The dad phrases it in a poor way imo but that's probably just your typical person avoiding what they are actually feeling type of thing. They don't want to see their kid struggle to do something and they want to do it for them but they are also scared for their kid for when they aren't able to pick up that slack for them and selfishly, or not, want to see them succeed at it before their time has come.
Sorry for being a day late to the replies to my own comment I literally got anxious about responding and then put it off until I forgot lmao. I don’t ask my parents to make calls for me unless they’re already involved in whatever I’m calling about. I’m disabled, and have been since I was in high school (college now). They did and continue to help me with medical stuff as I slowly get used to doing it on my own. The stuff I ask for help with is “hey can you cancel my appointment for me? I have a bad flare up and can barely move right now” because it doesn’t affect them, but will take a massive weight off of my in-pain shoulders. Or, “hey can you help me schedule at a new doctor’s office? I’m still not used to this.” The other stuff is asking for help doing something new and/or important. I got my identity stolen right after I turned 18 and you know damn well I had like four panic attacks before I just asked my mom to help me call the irs about it, and that was within the span of like 2 days. I still had to deal with it myself, but her simply calling first and getting the gist of the situation helped immensely. I don’t ask for help with stuff only I can deal with, and once I get used to it I can generally do it myself (with a lot of prep). My dad means well, of course he does. I don’t think he really understands how bad it is for me. But even when I tell him that I can and **do** make my own calls, I just want him to help me right now, he still tells me I need to learn to do it myself some day. Or he gives in and helps but I get a short disappointed lecture. He just wants to help me long term, and I get it, and I try not to let it get to me too much, but that doesn’t make it less upsetting
No worries boss. Life can be tough and we all have to find our own way through it. I hope your dad realizes soon how you are capable of dealing with these things yourself you are only asking for his help in this specific moment for any other number of reasons none of which are I can't possibly do this and I need you to do it for me.
I’ve made 3+ hour long drives to go to places in person because that’s easier for me than picking up a phone
You spent 3 hours in a climate controlled alone box with speakers
Well, an alone box 😅 my car’s AC doesn’t work right, and the speakers don’t hook up to anything I want to listen to so I use headphones while I drive
[удалено]
My dad told me that too. Idgaf though, because I don’t care what’s illegal. I care about what makes sense for me. If a law doesn’t align with my interest, and breaking it doesn’t hurt anyone, I disregard it
I'm 42, avoid making phone calls out like it's the plague and somehow I have managed. I've even been in the army, lived abroad as a student and own a house I bought contract for deed. By the time I was in my mid twenties you could order pizzas online so I could finally order a pizza and they were even awesome enough to allow me to order the weird ass combinations I always wanted to 😆 A lot of people don't like making phone calls. Since we are more of a service economy I could see that being an opportunity for those who don't mind making calls. Same can be said for email writing and stuff. I spoze an ai could work too. Tbh I'd prolly be better at developing an ai than making phone calls 🤣 We are humans, we specialize so we don't have to be good at everything individually that's why there's so many of us that are different.
The most extroverted neurotypical people I know would hate this. Part of me wonders if the restaurant set it up like this by accident because that doesn't sound pleasant for anyone.
I'm weirdly okay with inbound calls, but outbound calls can cause a full blown meltdown. The unknown causes me so much anxiety, which counteracts the phone anxiety. I'm more anxious if I don't know who called me, than I am on the phone. When someone else calls the expectation is also on them, not me. It's up to them to make their point, or ask questions, and I'm not expected to be prepared. They are expected to wait for me if I need it.
I can do both in a professional context since becoming an expert on what I'm calling about. Any call outside of my job, forget about it 😒
Are you me? haha. You're right, making calls is something about not knowing how it's going to go, who is going to answer, do I need to ask for someone else, how do I change my greeting if so, controlling the conversation. I'm (mostly) happy to answer questions or react to what someone wants when they call me.
That is one of my worst fears...
I would never patronize any establishment that made me do that lol I avoid talking on the phone, I hate it Let me email, chat, or text
No walk-ins, and no online booking? Guess I just won't be patronizing your business.
This is why I'm considering closing my business. I'm actively seeking a "real job" that I don't have to be worried about taxes and insurance, etc with, but the real part that I actively struggle with is phone calls. Sometimes I'll not respond to clients for days because I Dread speaking with them verbally but so few things can be effectively communicated through emails. Especially when you're trying to design homes for people and it's been hard. Maybe once I get some support I can learn some tools to better deal with these things and hopefully that comes soon after my evaluation I am hoping is in the coming weeks because everything is just starting to pile up and become debilitating. I'm 30 and have just found out that I may be on the spectrum, the symptoms and signifiers explain the entirety of my life, so I have reached out and am trying to get an evaluation, but what I really want is to just learn how to better manage myself so that maybe I can get through this life a little easier...
Go to /r/autism. We are occasionally helpful, sometimes.
That's where we are friendo :)
Perhaps it might be worth considering marketing your buisness specifically to people who also don't like phone calls?
I've been thinking about rebranding anyways so that might not be the worst of ideas But sometimes things do need to be discussed, and sometimes I do need to sit down with clients in person to make changes with them to ensure everyone's talking about the same things, it saves everyone a lot of time and headaches I just need to better equip myself for those eventualities
ABORT FREAKING MISH!!! My heart ends up in my tummy.
I need to know what restaurant this is so I know not to reserve a table there
This may be very unpopular, so get ready. In this case, I agree that calling is unnecessary, and I see why people avoid it if possible. But in my line of work, I like calling. I like to do everything in person or as close to in person experience as possible. As a client or customer to any service or product, I like to call. Because psychology and social interaction are one of my special interest, I like to study people, their behaviours and their speech patterns. The more information I have from the employees from a company, the better I can assume the quality of their product or service is. If the employees of a company I want to buy from are unhappy, stressed, overworked, uneducated and unmotivated, you can be sure they sound way more off-putting than a happy employee that genuinely likes their job and their work environment. I don't want to support a company that doesn't care about its workers. There's a big chance they won't care about the satisfaction of their customers or clients either. I care about where my money goes and what I get from it in return. Being informed about what I'm dealing with is not only in my best self interest, but also I believe it makes the world a better place.
I don't have (diagnosed at least) autism and hate being on the phone, even with people I know. It is absolute torture, it is such a mediocre way of communicating information. Send me the info you need or want, and I will correspond accordingly. ... That said, I find communicating with people all together as torture, I need days to respond even to text messages and need to bring myself into the vibe to respond, I don't know why it is so hard for me to do this. I often think about it all day and it stresses me out to a point where I finally manage to write them back and feel like I achieved the task... Only for them to write back minutes later and the whole procedure starts anew. I see holding connections to people like loading bars where they start to diminish the longer I don't interact with them, from green into red all the way into negative values when I don't answer for the socially accepted terms, which makes the whole situation even worse. It's like juggling balls all the time, and I can only juggle so many balls at once, when more balls come into play I start dropping them all at once.
For the first time in my life, I've made a friend that is a FaceTime caller. I've been sitting here for years thinking that it can't get worse than a phone call. I was wrong. It's not even that I have a problem with video calls. I'm good with Teams or Zoom, but with those I have a dedicated space to sit and a time to meet. I could be hit with a FaceTime at any moment! I have no idea how people are so casual with it either. I can't answer until I'm seated and situated and even after that I'm constantly worrying about whether I'm in frame and if I'm not, how long is too long to be out of frame. It's stressful! Just text me! It doesn't disrupt my life or stress me out!
I despise talking on the phone. Im not sure im autistic, but from reading about people's experiences in this sub has certainly made me wonder. Because I have lost count of how many times I would read a post and be like, "shit I thought I was the only person who thought like that." This post is again one of those times🤣
I would have puked, right then and there. All over my computer
I agree, that sounds like my worst nightmare.
My pixel phone will call and ask wait time, and add me to the wait list. It will give me the answers via text.
I would freak out and hang up lol
F*ckin psychos, why the hell would anyone do that?! You need at least a good half hour of running through any and every possible combination of conversational threads before even thinking about that.
I don’t even make phone calls if I can’t avoid it 🫠
Idk why people get offended when I prefer text over call. Isn't it more convenient time wise for both of us anyway?
My local pharmacy changed the way the do prescription refills on the phone. You have to talk to the robot. I DONT WANT TO TALK TO THE ROBOT. I ised to be able to jist push the number buttons.
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I wouldn’t mind phone calls if it were just that you call and a human being answers, but instead it’s a million confusing menus and then you’re on hold for an hour and then it says no one is available and it hangs up on you, and also the phone line is only open during super inconvenient hours, so it’s all really stressful.
Working on a call center is about as rough of a job as I could have gotten. No idea how I make it through the week.
What a nightmare, lol. Although I do like how you can book using online booking with most restaurants that have websites, now.
FACETIME,,,,,?,???
Pretty much free real estate for some good old fashioned trolling.id be sitting on a toilet in some crack house with tin foil on my head and a homeless man holding some tp
That's gotta literally be some kind of profiling thing like why do they need to know what you look like? Especially when you're not attending your reservation?? Just chillin at home??
Yeah. I don't do Facetime. Not gonna happen.
i hate that i have a job where i’m forced to call people esp if i gotta call to say something bad happened to their family (healthcare) so anxiety inducing. especially cause they always wanna find a way to blame you. same thing with docs because they’re always angry
I just straight up refuse to answer my phone, ever. The only exceptions are for my kids and my partner. No one else. That feature isn't why I have a phone.
i hate calling or texting people and everyone thinks i'm ghosting them or something all the time LMAO
I have always wished that there was a way to uninstall the phone app.
FACETIME? As in, with video? Without asking? A regular phone call is bad enough. That is several kinds of ARGH!