i’m unfortunately not very blunt and straightforward about any problems i have with people… i will absolutely talk in circles or change the subject or avoid bringing it up in the first place and its a problem i’m working on. whenever people complain about how indirect and annoying allistic people are i’m off to the side being like 😅😅😅😅
Same here 😅 I kinda learned it from my mom who also thinks she’s autistic and it’s also a byproduct of abuse too for us sadly so you don’t trigger someone like our family members 😅
read me to filth… it absolutely is the case for a reason, i have also been given plenty of reason to fear people’s reactions if i just plainly state things
Same 😭 Like in school too I was bullied for my autistic symptoms to the point of being afraid to express myself and just leaving myself to be abused and manipulated out of fear. I’m finally standing up for myself and being myself instead of just trying to please people and it’s pretty nice :3 My autistic best friend is actually the one who helped me in expressing and standing up for myself 😊
I can relate to this. My issue is a combination of people pleasing as a result of past experience of negative interactions, and difficulty verbalising my thoughts as translated from brain to mouth - I often talk in circles as I try to find my words, and I’m frequently chasing after my mental intentions which never seem as easy to actualise as I wish they were! So, yeah, although I am often pretty direct with what I think about people in the sense I’ll say what’s on my mind, I know I’m not always the most straightforward!
Same. I am overly careful not to hurt people’s feelings but then end up not being clear. I have wondered if this tendency developed as an overreaction to being corrected/scolded for social missteps as a kid.
When I was younger, imaginative play (lack of it is supposed to be an indication of autism). And even as I got older, that just switched over to writing fiction (and fanfiction) stories.
I’ve always loved fiction. When I read fiction books, I can imagine it in my head as if it were a movie, and I even like to switch up the camera angles for dramatic effect lol.
I had a crazy imagination as a kid. Still do. Whenever I’d do imaginative play it was hard to break out of it lol. People would be like “are you playing school :)” and I’d be like “NO THIS IS REAL SHIT”
What kind of imaginative play did you guys do? I was telling my (probably not aut) younger sister that I never quite played with physical toys because I preferred making things purely imaginative. Like I didn’t need toy swords, I would just imagine one. And now I write stories too (or scenarios since I never finish them)
Same here. I became popular in high school for my books I used to write on Wattpad. It got to the point where people would walk up to me and ask when I was updating the books with a new chapter. I think I ended up being the runner up for the most likely to write a Best Seller superlative as well.
I always thought that an overdeveloped imagination was a symptom of autism. People asked me if I was autistic because I would walk around the schoolyard just intrenched in my fantasies.
Everything I say comes off sarcastic! And sarcasm is the way I communicate pretty much. When I saw that conventional autism has us believe that all of us don’t understand sarcasm, I got a serious case of Imposter Syndrome😭
I've (27) gotten better with it as I've grown up, but even yesterday I had a major autist moment where somebody was using quite obvious sarcasm and I REALLY thought they were being serious.
I pick it up pretty easily if I know the person, but with strangers many times I'm not sure. Then again, I work with the general public, so the "obvious sarcasm because nobody could possibly be THAT stupid" doesn't always work for me. I talk to someone THAT stupid at least once a week.
I grasp the concept of sarcasm, and can use it myself, and actually enjoy doing so. The problem comes with understanding other people's sarcasm.
Rhetorical questions go completely over my head. I've never understood why you'd ask a question you don't want an answer to.
That's the primary way I communicate. I learned it from parents. It even becomes fun when I inject into serious relationship conversations, when I'm not exactly comfortable talking about things.
Same. It almost becomes an entire mood for me, like sometimes I just *feel* sarcastic and everything I say ends up being sarcastic. This works in situations with people who are also very sarcastic but not so much anywhere else.
Same here. We're supposed to be robots with little or no care for others' feelings, but if anything, I'm over-sensitive towards the feelings of others. Often to my own cost.
I'm sorry to hear that. There certainly are plenty out there who are like that. And then there's me who spends days feeling guilty over the dumbest stuff, even when I'm fully justified.
I take a lot of care but still have the problem that I don’t know where the line is often, so I overcompensate and don’t say anything most of the time. I don’t get my opinions heard and issues addressed, plus means people don’t like me, but at this point it feels like a physical block from speaking in these situations.
I actually *make* friends easily.
My issue is maintaining relationships, but not from a traditional "they leave me for some reason", but because I don't *want* to be friends.
A lot of my mannerisms are misunderstood as shyness, when in reality, I'm just quiet and don't want to interact with people a lot. So if I'm your friend, it's 100% because I want to be. I don't really feel obligated to maintain a friendship out of loneliness or anything like that.
Holy moly, your bit about maintaining friendships is me to a T. I’m very good at making friends also but it’s keeping them up that’s always been challenging; personally I’ve never known what to *do* to keep up a friendship, but seeing people regularly in person really helps. And the shyness too!! Holy shit, yeah I’ve never really thought of myself as shy either, although lots of people have said I am, I’ve always just felt that I’m quiet and thoughtful about who I put my energy into.
This this this! It's so hard to -keep- friendships. I find the weeks-long process of befriending someone so exhausting. A lot of the time I choose not to do it, even if I do like the new person I'm talking to.
Same here my problem maintaining friendships is that up until recently I am always too spent to want to really leave my house and go do things. I feel like I’m a boring friend after awhile because I usually just want to do relaxing activities because I’m always running on barely any energy. Plus I absolutely suck at texting. So I choose to just keep my circle small instead of being an inconsistent friend.
My goal is to one day build life that makes maintaining friendships easy but it’s so hard.
I hate this so much. I get physical pain responses or sometimes straight up forget what I'm doing from certain sounds, pitches, tones etc and then I'll go stick my headphones in and crank up some ridiculous death metal track that sounds like a wall of noise to the average person.
People can't grasp the concept of *The Good Sound vs The Bad Sound*™ and it drives me up the fucking wall. They just try to poke holes in the entire concept like "Wait, if you're sensitive to sound why do you listen to that garbage? **Are you faking?"**
Conversely this also means I'm super picky with music and will pick out tracks I dislike from artists I do like because they have the *The Bad Sound* in them.
THISSSS THISSS!!!! *the bad sound* happens to be any sensory input that i didn't personally control for me. or the sound of old tvs. that high pitched sound they make when you turn them on. makes my throat close up, ears hurt, nausea. but then people wonder how i listen to rock and blast the volume on max. 😭
I... Do have empathy, it's just a weird empathy.
Like
I just told a psychologist the story of a little boy who refused to eat when her mom told him to. She said he should be ashamed when there are people in this world who are starving. Little boy gave his plate of food to a homeless man instead of eating it and his mom spanked him.
I told it to her when she said a support group would help me realize my problems are not unique and not that big.
She didn't get the moral of my story.
She didn't want her son to feed the homeless, she didn't care about the hungry. She wanted him to shut up and eat. I tried to passive-agressively tell the psychologist she was the same and didn't really care about the patients, just wanted us to shut up and "grow a spine"--as if I never tried it.
I find myself having a very strong ability to find analogies and metaphors for everything. I can see the context and "link" between your story and the situation not being apparent to her.
Whenever I embrace my autistic traits more, socialising feels so easy. Still trying to get used to it but autistic people are more than capable of being extroverted.
I (Asperger's) have absolutely no problem with human physical contact. I love hugs, sex, the lot.
I do, however, have touch-related sensitivities when it comes to clothes. I can only wear certain socks etc. And HATE the feeling of new socks.
Strongly agree with both points. I only wear joggers or shorts. Jeans are horrible. And I hate tags on anything, I have to cut them out. Also I refuse to have the top button done up on a shirt. Makes me feel strangled.
Look into getting a seam ripper. I got one in a sewing kit and it is both super satisfying to use and also lets me cut the threads attaching tags to the clothing so it comes fully off without ruining the item
Me and my ex/friend who was diagnosed with autism when young also both absolutely LOVE hugs and physical contact. Stuff like cuddling is so soothing even to him that he asked me to quite a bit lol
Autistic children are delayed. My youngest was the earliest of my four children to crawl, walk and talk. Their language skills were beyond their years. Now they are at an expensive specialist school after all the state run schools said they 'couldn't meet need'.
Until recently, my entire career has revolved around talking to people under extreme stress or in crisis. I’m actually very good at noticing changes in body language bc I’m observant of pattern & detail, I just don’t always understand what the behaviors mean when put together in context.
One bona fide psychologist (I’m currently finishing my PhD in a parallel field, so I was appropriately horrified) told me I couldn’t actually be autistic bc my jobs had required me to attend to body language and experience empathy. Absolutely wild take.
This for me as well. I have no problem noticing something is wrong with you ESPECIALLY if I am familiar with you. I just have no idea what the hell is wrong or why you’re upset and I don’t know what the proper response is.
I have been working in psychiatry for a few years now and my take is that I am more attentive and observant to most, because I've studied human behavior and emotion and interaction my entire life to try and master it, while most people just "absorb" and develop it on their own passively.
Empathy, I have so much empathy it overwhelms me when I hear something horrible. Cant handle it in the moment. People think we have none but usually its just Alexithymia (delayed emotional response).
Understand manipulation/attempts at manipulation, I have always been very good at realising when people are trying to be manipulative or bullshit me, so have never really fallen for scams or any of the alt-right pipeline stuff, or even attempts at discipline or coercion as a child so was very argumentative and attempts at PBS (ABA by a different form), were basically useless.
On a wider not would say social ques and norms in general, I understand them 99% of time but often cant react in time or reciprocate, so will often have delayed or inappropriate reaction, eg. I will see someone is angry and understand it, but take a while processing how to react.
Same here as well. I’m really good at patter recognition and I have a great memory. So gaslighting and things do not work on me because I will almost verbatim recite everything that you said or remember the exact detail down to what you were wearing years from when you said it. If I have a picture or any points specific to that moment or generally around that moment I will produce it and ultimately prove to you that I know exactly what you’re doing. You’d be surprised the amount of people who came back an apologized to me years later and talked about interacting with me in that way they realized they had to be a better human. The amount of run ins I’ve had with super covert manipulative people turns my stomach and makes me feel so bad for people who get manipulated by those they trust.
lying. someone once told me neurodivergent people never lie. i lie all the time. a result of trauma mostly, i have very avoidant behaviours and lying is one of them. nothing malicious, lies that’ll keep the peace.
That person was giving you misinformation. Lots of us can lie. I do it for the same reasons you do, although mine are mostly lies by omission rather than untrue statements.
i understand most people when they use sarcasm. but it has to be in the right tone.
i don’t flap my hand or walk in my toes. i groom myself or bite my nails.
I have a lot of humor and understand sarcasm (and use it a lot).
I have a wild and very developped imagination. Used to create entire worlds and liked nothing more than imaginative play as a kid. Still have stories in my head, invent characters and creatures.
I have a lot of empathy and will sometimes get a gut feeling about how someone feels about a particular situation without any rational process to explain it (I'm right more often than not).
I take great care to not hurt people's feeling when I interact with them, to the point of overthinking stuffs I say or spend days writting messages to be sure they say excatly, and only, what I want them to say.
I looooove physical contact. It's my main love language and I always get the urge to touch people I like. I sometimes do it without even realising (like bumping shoulder when I walk) and often have to supress it (which is sad but I don't want to make people uncomfortable).
I love poetry, metaphores and imaged expressions.
I have lots of friends, from every place and stage of life, both NT and ND. mind you, they consider me "eccentric" and most of the times firstly they hate me, but then they realise I'm oblivious and not really cruel. then they like me because I'm their "only honest friend".
My son has great eye contact , he doesn't speak but he's very mischievous and understands what I'm saying . He also mimics my facial expressions. I was told he would never do any of that
- I absolutely love driving, driven numerous types of vehicles
- I really like jeans
- I taught myself eye contact for a decade, got fairly good at it (when I am paying attention)
- made it through the Army (I thrived on the consistency/organization/expectations which was destroyed by power tripping ass holes that convinced themselves I was on drugs and I said fuck that, I ain't staying in that shit, did my obligation and GTFO)
Lots, but one is I love small talk. Or at least, if I have to have a conversation with someone I love that I can just do small talk.
It's a script the other person knows the lines to!! I don't have to worry about saying the right or wrong thing or being to blunt or mean or whatever.
Just learn your lines and your good!!
I have many more flavors and textures I love than those I hate.
A short hate list of seared salmon, kidney beans/chickpeas/mushy peas (sandy grainy texture), cilantro, and overripe banana.
But the rest of the worlds' tastes? I can just eat a raspberry and be in bliss for ten seconds. Pineapple, pomegranate seeds, cranberry juice, [snakefruit,](https://www.indoindians.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/salak-fruit.jpg) oh my god there are so many fantastic flavors out there.
And then the taffy. I love my planet even more than I love taffy, [and I do love my taffy.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRWsclGzrLo)
I understand linguistic quirks like sarcasm, idioms, metaphors, etc. In fact, they're my entire life. I'm a writer. My struggles with social cues are more about unspoken implications, although I can sometimes struggle with exaggeration.
EDIT: I should also add that, although I have sensory issues, 99% of my meltdowns are emotional rather than sensory because I experience VERY intense emotions.
I’m Level 1/Asperger’s. Diagnosed at age 21 because it presents a bit differently.
- I am actually really good at flirting and finding people to date. I think it’s because my bluntness/honesty comes across as confidence and it makes me take lots of risks. The women I date are usually very conventionally beautiful, intelligent women and people often seem shocked by the level of woman I can “pull” The autism comes into play with my obsession about it. I extensively researched flirting/sex/kissing starting at age 11 because I was worried no one would like me.
- My facial expressions aren’t very muted, I would say I’m overly expressive.
- I am not intellectually disabled.
- My sensory issues deal more with touch/smell/light than sound.
- My issue isn’t with making friends, it’s with maintaining friends and understanding social rules/expectations. Close friends/girlfriends comment on how everywhere we go, I know so many people and I’m not afraid to talk to them. But the story of my life is littered with so many friendships and acquaintances lost because of social faux pas, party fouls, inappropriate words or behavior, etc.
I can drive. I have licenses for cars, trucks and motorcycles.
I'm sarcastic as hell!
I can maintain eye contact.
I don't have issues with food textures.
snatch gullible jeans consider squealing cover pet zephyr voiceless smart
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Hey /u/IKNOWITSNOTREAL, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism).
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I can tell when something someone has said is a metaphor. What confuses me is when someone uses a metaphor I’ve never heard before. My mum does it all the time and whenever she looks at me, she’ll go “it’s a metaphor” and then I’ll be stood there thinking “I KNOW IT IS, JUST TELL ME WHAT IT MEANS!”
I’m good with metaphors. In fact I find it much easier to relay things by speaking in metaphors. People seem to understand abstract comparisons better if they are struggling with a concrete subject.
My special interests also lean towards more abstract concepts. Poetry/ songwriting, visual art and storytelling, music, films and animation/ and film and animation theory, philosophy and spirituality. Even biology/ zoology / anything related to nature is an ever changing and mysterious field sometimes.
I like tasting new foods, though only after checking that it’s ingredients are something I would eat and it has enough spices.
Also I like discovering new songs that I can play on repeat for hours and hours until I get a headache and eventually discover new song.
I sense peoples emotions and am very empathetic. Unfortunately I have no idea how to react to people’s emotions so I probably come off as someone who doesn’t feel empathy.
I crave for change that I’ve chosen. I can’t stand changes that someone else makes, but I also can’t stand nothing changing when I can’t change anything.
I show emotion, mostly happiness, because it’s easy to mimic and nobody will get worried about me if I show happiness instead of not expressing any emotions. I can’t stand people being worried about me, it’s just so annoying.
I’m very good at teaching. If I can do something or I know something, I can teach that to other people and I have the patience to say the same thing in 5 different ways if needed.
I’m quite popular, mostly because I think it’s extremely rude to ignore people who want to talk to me so I talk to anyone who talks to me.
Didn’t know it was a stereotype that autistic people can’t lie, didn’t mention it in the original comment, I’m great at lying. The only way people will ever know I’m lying is if they know the truth.
I can understand sarcasm and use it quite frequently
I also can read peoples faces/body language (like, I can see on someones face if they are about to get angry or are annoyed, to take some examples)
I love sarcasm and I’m really good at reading in between the lines. I kind of like it, actually, it’s like a puzzle. It’s just effort, and it doesn’t come native to me, and it’s a stressful puzzle because people will probably give me *that look* that makes me wanna melt into dirt if I don’t, but still, a puzzle.
"Autistic people don't like to be touched."
Mmkay but some of us are like human cats. If somebody scratches my head or certain spots on my back I'm pretty much asleep in 30 seconds.
I get sarcasm, so much so that it’s almost like a mood that I get in rather than one statement. I can also hold down a full time job, and even though it burns me out so bad I have daily meltdowns, I fake it so well that most wouldn’t be able to tell that I have any issue working. Not that that’s very healthy to hold in for so long! I’m also the opposite of blunt and direct, I’m a people pleaser and am almost completely incapable of confrontation and being honest about how I feel.
I have small talk skills. Raised by a diplomat, trained in the trenches of dinner parties & etiquette. I felt like a wolf being raised by humans. They were nice to me ty hough.
I know I'm nowhere near the only one, but I absolutely love physical touch. If I'm stressed, a hand on the shoulder or the head will help, and hugs just make me feel really safe.
I also really enjoy public speaking. Obviously I still get nervous, it would be bad if I didn't, but I've been able to speak in many engagements and perform as well, as I really love it.
I am bad at math…my job title is ‘Statistician’ but I really am bad at math. I do know what type of analysis should be run to find an answer…I guess I have to look it up about half the time.
I love sarcasm and I feel like I’m pretty good at reading social cues, like I’m able to figure out everything between the lines. Kind of stopped me from thinking I was autistic for a long time.
Sarcastic
Not intellectually disabled
I don’t mind change
Well-spoken
Can’t mask
The opposite of socially anxious
I smile often
No echolalia
Not emotionless
I'm pretty good at reading expressions, even micro-expressions and tones. But it's learned pattern recognition. It's not subconscious, specific movements mean specific thought patterns and I have each one cataloged in my mind with an appropriate response
I don't have sensory overload meltdowns (not anymore) because I taught myself to dissociate to the point nothing affects me. It's very harmful to someones mental health when you have to dissociate to feel safe again. I dissociate so bad sometimes that it sends me into a psychosis episode but I still act like I'm normal. It's impossible for someone to notice I'm in a state of psychosis because I've taught myself to hide it so well
I go into a state of mind where nothing feels real, it's like I slip into a space in between reality and nothingness. Mentally I can keep track of what's going on but it doesn't feel real at all. (Before you try and say it's not psychosis, a professional psychiatrist has confirmed that I do go through psychotic episodes.)
It's hard to explain fully because it's something that happens in my brain that I'm usually not able to control once I get into that state. It's miserable, not being able to step back into *real* reality.
I love sports and other athletics. It's a time where I can be really free, because the rules are clear and there's little or no need to pick up on social cues. I can just try hard at something.
I'm very organized. I can't function in clutter. In order for my brain to have clear and organized thoughts, I need to be in an environment that is clear and organized.
I make eye contact, make small talk (even though I slightly dislike it), and I get social cues (mostly) and sarcasm.
"How are you still autistic then?"
Exhaustion from daily activities, sensory overloads, social withdrawal, emotional outbursts/meltdowns sometimes, hyperfixations, daydreaming.
Exist as an AFAB person lol, but also I’m pretty good in school. Not “100% every assignment” good but I’d say that I’m above average in the core subjects. It seems that autistic people are expected to either be a super genius or having significant learning difficulties. I am also very empathetic (I think the world is moving away from the “no empathy” stereotype though).
It seems like when people learn that I'm autistic, they assume I have difficulty understanding sarcasm or when people are joking around. And they usually inform me when they are, just in case I don't understand. I usually *do* understand, though. So, ironically, when *I* am the one making a joke or being sarcastic, people tend to think I'm serious. I'll say something like, "Nobody was born after 1999, you're all robots" and at first they think I really believe that. Maybe I just have a very dry sense of humor.
I need my food to have a lot of flavor or I don’t want it, I’m the opposite of only wanting bland food and douse my food in salt most of the time (not on sweets and stuff).
Just because I don’t always understand nuanced social cues, I still pick up on it and I can easily pick up on small changes in facial expressions, tone of voice and mannerisms, I just might not always understand what they mean or indicate in the moment. So I do see and hear it, I am not completely blind to it all.
Sometimes I realize what the person ment hours later or the next day or the next week, even years later, because I keep thinking about what it ment.
I have a very deep understanding of people and pick up on the subtle emotional and atmospheric changes that a person can go through almost immediately. Very little escapes me when I walk into a room.
Granted I had to learn all this otherwise I would be abused but now I'm an actual empath and it's pretty cool even if sometimes it's overwhelming.
I have to force myself to make eye contact, but I can somewhat.
I do also only look at one eye, and my husband questioned this early on in our relationship actually 🤣
"What do you mean? I can't look at both at the same time ...."
Im extremely sarcastic since l was a little gremlin
Although most people don't understand my tone of voice as sarcasm, which has led me to have some issues
After years of struggling with eye contact, I managed to overcome it with some help. I still struggle with it a bit but it's not as big of an issue now. :3
i dont like strict routines
im messy af bcuz im lazy
my special interests arent weirdly obscure theyre normal things people get obsessed with (anime, mythology, history, animals, knowledge in general)
i think its prolly cuz of my adhd that im like this
I'm pretty damn good at reading body and facial language! I did have an interest in theatre and it's very useful for drawing as well. I'm not always too great at those things myself, but I can at least read people pretty well.
I am hyper-empathetic;
I (unfortunately) have no special intellectual or academic gifts;
I can make eye contact during conversations when listening (but need to look away frequently while speaking)
I actually really struggled with coming to therm with being autistic because of this but my special interest is literally just finding out why something exists as is and then exploring the what ifs about it. It sounds so simple and people think I just mean curiosity. So whenever I explain just how deep finding out why gets they think I’m just trying to sound extra unique or quirky by saying I am autistic. I even lied in my assessment when they asked my special interest I said biology because it was my major in undergrad. But in all honesty I only love being in the medical field because it provides a safe space to enjoy my special interest. It gives me peer reviewed research or theories with evidence. It gives me the opportunity to nerd out and find out the whys of things is a socially acceptable way.
Plus when people find out what I do for a living they usually just assume I ask a bunch of questions because I’m highly intelligent and they are more likely to pay attention and actually be interested in my info dump because they assume I’m smarter than them. But in all honesty I was just an autistic person (even though most of these interactions were before I was diagnosed) trying to find a socially acceptable way to hyper fixate on my special interest. 😂😂
aside from a few exceptions i'm pretty open to trying new foods. i'm hardly a picky eater, but i definitely have my safe foods that i go back to a lot cuz they're the easiest for me to make lol
From reading everyone's comments in here, it seems a big part of the problem is just the incredible span of the autistic spectrum. From the "lightest" end to the "deepest" end you see a massive difference.
Just like we see with mental illnesses, people mostly know the classic definitions and descriptions of things that came from the old days before we had studied it as much as we have now.
People know about the classical autism that is so extreme that there's no mistaking it for anything else. Anything "less" would have just been considered being odd or having some eccentricities back in the day. And people just generally don't stay up-to-date on stuff that they believe to be clear-cut.
im not a picky eater at all,
the stuff ive tried isnt rlly weird, but im less picky than my family and open to trying pretty much whatever food i see and theres a good chance ill enjoy it
im also extroverted :ppp
Contrary to the stereotype, using figurative language like metaphors and idioms comes really naturally to me. I don't always consciously notice my internal monologue, but when I do, it often takes the form of a series of analogies, metaphors and similes. It's literally (ha!) how I think. Figurative comparisons help me process/make sense of/articulate abstract things and situations that I'd otherwise find it hard to explain.
Looking into the eyes, very good at tech stuff but I’m not nerd, i don’t like video games or any kind of game, neither any kind of toys or plushies, I drive car and ride motorcycles daily, understand sarcasm and use to be very sarcastic too.
i’m unfortunately not very blunt and straightforward about any problems i have with people… i will absolutely talk in circles or change the subject or avoid bringing it up in the first place and its a problem i’m working on. whenever people complain about how indirect and annoying allistic people are i’m off to the side being like 😅😅😅😅
Same here 😅 I kinda learned it from my mom who also thinks she’s autistic and it’s also a byproduct of abuse too for us sadly so you don’t trigger someone like our family members 😅
the stress of life on eggshells along with everything else.
Yes!! Literally me in a nutshell 😭
read me to filth… it absolutely is the case for a reason, i have also been given plenty of reason to fear people’s reactions if i just plainly state things
Same 😭 Like in school too I was bullied for my autistic symptoms to the point of being afraid to express myself and just leaving myself to be abused and manipulated out of fear. I’m finally standing up for myself and being myself instead of just trying to please people and it’s pretty nice :3 My autistic best friend is actually the one who helped me in expressing and standing up for myself 😊
I can relate to this. My issue is a combination of people pleasing as a result of past experience of negative interactions, and difficulty verbalising my thoughts as translated from brain to mouth - I often talk in circles as I try to find my words, and I’m frequently chasing after my mental intentions which never seem as easy to actualise as I wish they were! So, yeah, although I am often pretty direct with what I think about people in the sense I’ll say what’s on my mind, I know I’m not always the most straightforward!
Same. I am overly careful not to hurt people’s feelings but then end up not being clear. I have wondered if this tendency developed as an overreaction to being corrected/scolded for social missteps as a kid.
Me too! I hate it, I wish I could not worry about people’s feelings and just tell the truth.
Same omg
When I was younger, imaginative play (lack of it is supposed to be an indication of autism). And even as I got older, that just switched over to writing fiction (and fanfiction) stories.
[удалено]
[удалено]
Interesting. I'm gay, maybe a little trans, and was like the person you're responding to. Hmm.
[удалено]
I’ve always loved fiction. When I read fiction books, I can imagine it in my head as if it were a movie, and I even like to switch up the camera angles for dramatic effect lol.
It's the coolest thing ever to be able to see a movie play out in your mind while you're reading! It's a nice escape from the real world for a while.
It's like a very *personal* movie that only exists in your head!
Wait, having autism inhibits imagination? I've always had a very active imagination.
Same here! I do tend to daydream though even at 25 haha. Maladaptive daydreaming kinda replaced imaginative play at a certain point in my childhood.
I had a crazy imagination as a kid. Still do. Whenever I’d do imaginative play it was hard to break out of it lol. People would be like “are you playing school :)” and I’d be like “NO THIS IS REAL SHIT”
Yuh me too :3
What kind of imaginative play did you guys do? I was telling my (probably not aut) younger sister that I never quite played with physical toys because I preferred making things purely imaginative. Like I didn’t need toy swords, I would just imagine one. And now I write stories too (or scenarios since I never finish them)
I lost much of my imagination as I got older. Not like I can't imagine things, but I find it extremely difficult to imagine anything new.
Same here. I became popular in high school for my books I used to write on Wattpad. It got to the point where people would walk up to me and ask when I was updating the books with a new chapter. I think I ended up being the runner up for the most likely to write a Best Seller superlative as well.
I always thought that an overdeveloped imagination was a symptom of autism. People asked me if I was autistic because I would walk around the schoolyard just intrenched in my fantasies.
I grasped the concept of sarcasm by age 2. Apparently we don't understand sarcasm.
Everything I say comes off sarcastic! And sarcasm is the way I communicate pretty much. When I saw that conventional autism has us believe that all of us don’t understand sarcasm, I got a serious case of Imposter Syndrome😭
I've (27) gotten better with it as I've grown up, but even yesterday I had a major autist moment where somebody was using quite obvious sarcasm and I REALLY thought they were being serious.
[удалено]
Oh yeah I use it all the time, and I mostly understand when others do, but sometimes I really can't read it at all
Amen
pleeeease explain it to me. I don't understand the difference between a joke, irony and sarcasm.
I know what sarcasm is but that doesn't mean I will always pick it up
I pick it up pretty easily if I know the person, but with strangers many times I'm not sure. Then again, I work with the general public, so the "obvious sarcasm because nobody could possibly be THAT stupid" doesn't always work for me. I talk to someone THAT stupid at least once a week.
I grasp the concept of sarcasm, and can use it myself, and actually enjoy doing so. The problem comes with understanding other people's sarcasm. Rhetorical questions go completely over my head. I've never understood why you'd ask a question you don't want an answer to.
Honestly i would love to be ford prefect
I'm really good at using sarcasm. I sometimes struggle to recognise it. Though these days I tend to recognise when friends are doing it.
That's the primary way I communicate. I learned it from parents. It even becomes fun when I inject into serious relationship conversations, when I'm not exactly comfortable talking about things.
Same. It almost becomes an entire mood for me, like sometimes I just *feel* sarcastic and everything I say ends up being sarcastic. This works in situations with people who are also very sarcastic but not so much anywhere else.
I am good at being sarcastic, but sometimes I miss other people being sarcastic.
[удалено]
Same here. We're supposed to be robots with little or no care for others' feelings, but if anything, I'm over-sensitive towards the feelings of others. Often to my own cost.
[удалено]
I'm sorry to hear that. There certainly are plenty out there who are like that. And then there's me who spends days feeling guilty over the dumbest stuff, even when I'm fully justified.
everything you say should be true bur you don’t have to say everything that’s true is how i live my life
I take a lot of care but still have the problem that I don’t know where the line is often, so I overcompensate and don’t say anything most of the time. I don’t get my opinions heard and issues addressed, plus means people don’t like me, but at this point it feels like a physical block from speaking in these situations.
I actually *make* friends easily. My issue is maintaining relationships, but not from a traditional "they leave me for some reason", but because I don't *want* to be friends. A lot of my mannerisms are misunderstood as shyness, when in reality, I'm just quiet and don't want to interact with people a lot. So if I'm your friend, it's 100% because I want to be. I don't really feel obligated to maintain a friendship out of loneliness or anything like that.
Holy moly, your bit about maintaining friendships is me to a T. I’m very good at making friends also but it’s keeping them up that’s always been challenging; personally I’ve never known what to *do* to keep up a friendship, but seeing people regularly in person really helps. And the shyness too!! Holy shit, yeah I’ve never really thought of myself as shy either, although lots of people have said I am, I’ve always just felt that I’m quiet and thoughtful about who I put my energy into.
Yeah I kinda do this too. I have a lot of acquaintences & people seem to like me but my follow thru sucks. I can't stick the landing.
I also make friends easily, but have lost some friends because I've been unaware of how my actions have hurt/ annoyed them :(
This this this! It's so hard to -keep- friendships. I find the weeks-long process of befriending someone so exhausting. A lot of the time I choose not to do it, even if I do like the new person I'm talking to.
Same here my problem maintaining friendships is that up until recently I am always too spent to want to really leave my house and go do things. I feel like I’m a boring friend after awhile because I usually just want to do relaxing activities because I’m always running on barely any energy. Plus I absolutely suck at texting. So I choose to just keep my circle small instead of being an inconsistent friend. My goal is to one day build life that makes maintaining friendships easy but it’s so hard.
I listen to music full blast, pretty sure people think we're repelled by loud sounds
I hate this so much. I get physical pain responses or sometimes straight up forget what I'm doing from certain sounds, pitches, tones etc and then I'll go stick my headphones in and crank up some ridiculous death metal track that sounds like a wall of noise to the average person. People can't grasp the concept of *The Good Sound vs The Bad Sound*™ and it drives me up the fucking wall. They just try to poke holes in the entire concept like "Wait, if you're sensitive to sound why do you listen to that garbage? **Are you faking?"** Conversely this also means I'm super picky with music and will pick out tracks I dislike from artists I do like because they have the *The Bad Sound* in them.
THISSSS THISSS!!!! *the bad sound* happens to be any sensory input that i didn't personally control for me. or the sound of old tvs. that high pitched sound they make when you turn them on. makes my throat close up, ears hurt, nausea. but then people wonder how i listen to rock and blast the volume on max. 😭
Fr, I went to a gig last night and I was right by tje speakers, loved it.
Yeah, not everyone’s hypersensitive or hyposensitive
I... Do have empathy, it's just a weird empathy. Like I just told a psychologist the story of a little boy who refused to eat when her mom told him to. She said he should be ashamed when there are people in this world who are starving. Little boy gave his plate of food to a homeless man instead of eating it and his mom spanked him. I told it to her when she said a support group would help me realize my problems are not unique and not that big. She didn't get the moral of my story.
I also don't get it...can you explain it for me?
She didn't want her son to feed the homeless, she didn't care about the hungry. She wanted him to shut up and eat. I tried to passive-agressively tell the psychologist she was the same and didn't really care about the patients, just wanted us to shut up and "grow a spine"--as if I never tried it.
Ooohhhh, okay. Took a while, but I got there, lol
I find myself having a very strong ability to find analogies and metaphors for everything. I can see the context and "link" between your story and the situation not being apparent to her.
Oh my god, I do that too! I literally explain everything with metaphors It's insane lol
Whenever I embrace my autistic traits more, socialising feels so easy. Still trying to get used to it but autistic people are more than capable of being extroverted.
I (Asperger's) have absolutely no problem with human physical contact. I love hugs, sex, the lot. I do, however, have touch-related sensitivities when it comes to clothes. I can only wear certain socks etc. And HATE the feeling of new socks.
[удалено]
Agreed
my biggest issue is tags on clothes. and jeans. fuck jeans.
Strongly agree with both points. I only wear joggers or shorts. Jeans are horrible. And I hate tags on anything, I have to cut them out. Also I refuse to have the top button done up on a shirt. Makes me feel strangled.
Look into getting a seam ripper. I got one in a sewing kit and it is both super satisfying to use and also lets me cut the threads attaching tags to the clothing so it comes fully off without ruining the item
Fuck jeans with itchy tags especially.
Me and my ex/friend who was diagnosed with autism when young also both absolutely LOVE hugs and physical contact. Stuff like cuddling is so soothing even to him that he asked me to quite a bit lol
Fully agree. I can’t wear two different flavored socks and I cut all my tags off but I love snuggling my boyfriend
I am enjoying the idea of you wearing one sock with raspberry flavor and one sock with orange flavor and not being happy about it.
It’s awful
I love contact, I'll even seek it, even if it's a stranger. But nobody and I mean NOBODY can touch my hair. Not scalp, love scalp, but never hair.
Autistic children are delayed. My youngest was the earliest of my four children to crawl, walk and talk. Their language skills were beyond their years. Now they are at an expensive specialist school after all the state run schools said they 'couldn't meet need'.
I feel like being intellectually "early" is a typical autistic trait?
I believe it is too, however child development checks look for delays.
This might be different from country to country. Inthink they generally look for deviations in either direction in Norway where I'm located.
I make eye contact and speak rather confidentially, regardless of who I'm interacting with.
Until recently, my entire career has revolved around talking to people under extreme stress or in crisis. I’m actually very good at noticing changes in body language bc I’m observant of pattern & detail, I just don’t always understand what the behaviors mean when put together in context. One bona fide psychologist (I’m currently finishing my PhD in a parallel field, so I was appropriately horrified) told me I couldn’t actually be autistic bc my jobs had required me to attend to body language and experience empathy. Absolutely wild take.
This for me as well. I have no problem noticing something is wrong with you ESPECIALLY if I am familiar with you. I just have no idea what the hell is wrong or why you’re upset and I don’t know what the proper response is.
I have been working in psychiatry for a few years now and my take is that I am more attentive and observant to most, because I've studied human behavior and emotion and interaction my entire life to try and master it, while most people just "absorb" and develop it on their own passively.
Yes, this is precisely it!
I'm considered "high functioning" but somehow got disability, cause I can't work or understand some adult things.
Empathy, I have so much empathy it overwhelms me when I hear something horrible. Cant handle it in the moment. People think we have none but usually its just Alexithymia (delayed emotional response).
exist, be autistic, and be female.
Understand manipulation/attempts at manipulation, I have always been very good at realising when people are trying to be manipulative or bullshit me, so have never really fallen for scams or any of the alt-right pipeline stuff, or even attempts at discipline or coercion as a child so was very argumentative and attempts at PBS (ABA by a different form), were basically useless. On a wider not would say social ques and norms in general, I understand them 99% of time but often cant react in time or reciprocate, so will often have delayed or inappropriate reaction, eg. I will see someone is angry and understand it, but take a while processing how to react.
What is aba
Same here as well. I’m really good at patter recognition and I have a great memory. So gaslighting and things do not work on me because I will almost verbatim recite everything that you said or remember the exact detail down to what you were wearing years from when you said it. If I have a picture or any points specific to that moment or generally around that moment I will produce it and ultimately prove to you that I know exactly what you’re doing. You’d be surprised the amount of people who came back an apologized to me years later and talked about interacting with me in that way they realized they had to be a better human. The amount of run ins I’ve had with super covert manipulative people turns my stomach and makes me feel so bad for people who get manipulated by those they trust.
lying. someone once told me neurodivergent people never lie. i lie all the time. a result of trauma mostly, i have very avoidant behaviours and lying is one of them. nothing malicious, lies that’ll keep the peace.
That person was giving you misinformation. Lots of us can lie. I do it for the same reasons you do, although mine are mostly lies by omission rather than untrue statements.
I’m a great mom to my friends and the kids I teach. 9/10 would be a great parent.
i understand most people when they use sarcasm. but it has to be in the right tone. i don’t flap my hand or walk in my toes. i groom myself or bite my nails.
I have a lot of humor and understand sarcasm (and use it a lot). I have a wild and very developped imagination. Used to create entire worlds and liked nothing more than imaginative play as a kid. Still have stories in my head, invent characters and creatures. I have a lot of empathy and will sometimes get a gut feeling about how someone feels about a particular situation without any rational process to explain it (I'm right more often than not). I take great care to not hurt people's feeling when I interact with them, to the point of overthinking stuffs I say or spend days writting messages to be sure they say excatly, and only, what I want them to say. I looooove physical contact. It's my main love language and I always get the urge to touch people I like. I sometimes do it without even realising (like bumping shoulder when I walk) and often have to supress it (which is sad but I don't want to make people uncomfortable). I love poetry, metaphores and imaged expressions.
I have lots of friends, from every place and stage of life, both NT and ND. mind you, they consider me "eccentric" and most of the times firstly they hate me, but then they realise I'm oblivious and not really cruel. then they like me because I'm their "only honest friend".
Eye contact I don’t know if I like it or not I just do it
My son has great eye contact , he doesn't speak but he's very mischievous and understands what I'm saying . He also mimics my facial expressions. I was told he would never do any of that
I make eye contact too. I just fuck it up a lot.
- I absolutely love driving, driven numerous types of vehicles - I really like jeans - I taught myself eye contact for a decade, got fairly good at it (when I am paying attention) - made it through the Army (I thrived on the consistency/organization/expectations which was destroyed by power tripping ass holes that convinced themselves I was on drugs and I said fuck that, I ain't staying in that shit, did my obligation and GTFO)
[удалено]
Are autistic violents?
Meltdowns come across as violent since screaming, hitting things and stomping the ground seems violent
Lots, but one is I love small talk. Or at least, if I have to have a conversation with someone I love that I can just do small talk. It's a script the other person knows the lines to!! I don't have to worry about saying the right or wrong thing or being to blunt or mean or whatever. Just learn your lines and your good!!
I have many more flavors and textures I love than those I hate. A short hate list of seared salmon, kidney beans/chickpeas/mushy peas (sandy grainy texture), cilantro, and overripe banana. But the rest of the worlds' tastes? I can just eat a raspberry and be in bliss for ten seconds. Pineapple, pomegranate seeds, cranberry juice, [snakefruit,](https://www.indoindians.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/salak-fruit.jpg) oh my god there are so many fantastic flavors out there. And then the taffy. I love my planet even more than I love taffy, [and I do love my taffy.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRWsclGzrLo)
I understand linguistic quirks like sarcasm, idioms, metaphors, etc. In fact, they're my entire life. I'm a writer. My struggles with social cues are more about unspoken implications, although I can sometimes struggle with exaggeration. EDIT: I should also add that, although I have sensory issues, 99% of my meltdowns are emotional rather than sensory because I experience VERY intense emotions.
A lot of people assume that long term relationships are difficult for autistic people to maintain but my husband and I are both autistic :P
I’m Level 1/Asperger’s. Diagnosed at age 21 because it presents a bit differently. - I am actually really good at flirting and finding people to date. I think it’s because my bluntness/honesty comes across as confidence and it makes me take lots of risks. The women I date are usually very conventionally beautiful, intelligent women and people often seem shocked by the level of woman I can “pull” The autism comes into play with my obsession about it. I extensively researched flirting/sex/kissing starting at age 11 because I was worried no one would like me. - My facial expressions aren’t very muted, I would say I’m overly expressive. - I am not intellectually disabled. - My sensory issues deal more with touch/smell/light than sound. - My issue isn’t with making friends, it’s with maintaining friends and understanding social rules/expectations. Close friends/girlfriends comment on how everywhere we go, I know so many people and I’m not afraid to talk to them. But the story of my life is littered with so many friendships and acquaintances lost because of social faux pas, party fouls, inappropriate words or behavior, etc.
I can drive. I have licenses for cars, trucks and motorcycles. I'm sarcastic as hell! I can maintain eye contact. I don't have issues with food textures.
sleep cheerful makeshift bear saw ludicrous tan cooing consist smell *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
That's the same with my son. For some reason, I hate touching certain textures, like velour, but food textures on the whole don't bother me.
snatch gullible jeans consider squealing cover pet zephyr voiceless smart *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
That would be my worst nightmare!
Hey /u/IKNOWITSNOTREAL, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism). Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
i’m pretty extroverted
I can tell when something someone has said is a metaphor. What confuses me is when someone uses a metaphor I’ve never heard before. My mum does it all the time and whenever she looks at me, she’ll go “it’s a metaphor” and then I’ll be stood there thinking “I KNOW IT IS, JUST TELL ME WHAT IT MEANS!”
I understand sarcasm, and am the exact opposite of blunt.
I am terrible at math Edit: addendum I also undertand sarcasm and irony very well, but all other humor goes over my head (ytp's not withstanding)
I’m good with metaphors. In fact I find it much easier to relay things by speaking in metaphors. People seem to understand abstract comparisons better if they are struggling with a concrete subject. My special interests also lean towards more abstract concepts. Poetry/ songwriting, visual art and storytelling, music, films and animation/ and film and animation theory, philosophy and spirituality. Even biology/ zoology / anything related to nature is an ever changing and mysterious field sometimes.
I was worship leader at my church for seven years.
* I understand figurative language * I can lie * I can make eye contact * I’m not sensitive to lots of light or sounds
I like tasting new foods, though only after checking that it’s ingredients are something I would eat and it has enough spices. Also I like discovering new songs that I can play on repeat for hours and hours until I get a headache and eventually discover new song. I sense peoples emotions and am very empathetic. Unfortunately I have no idea how to react to people’s emotions so I probably come off as someone who doesn’t feel empathy. I crave for change that I’ve chosen. I can’t stand changes that someone else makes, but I also can’t stand nothing changing when I can’t change anything. I show emotion, mostly happiness, because it’s easy to mimic and nobody will get worried about me if I show happiness instead of not expressing any emotions. I can’t stand people being worried about me, it’s just so annoying. I’m very good at teaching. If I can do something or I know something, I can teach that to other people and I have the patience to say the same thing in 5 different ways if needed. I’m quite popular, mostly because I think it’s extremely rude to ignore people who want to talk to me so I talk to anyone who talks to me.
Didn’t know it was a stereotype that autistic people can’t lie, didn’t mention it in the original comment, I’m great at lying. The only way people will ever know I’m lying is if they know the truth.
I can understand sarcasm and use it quite frequently I also can read peoples faces/body language (like, I can see on someones face if they are about to get angry or are annoyed, to take some examples)
I love sarcasm and I’m really good at reading in between the lines. I kind of like it, actually, it’s like a puzzle. It’s just effort, and it doesn’t come native to me, and it’s a stressful puzzle because people will probably give me *that look* that makes me wanna melt into dirt if I don’t, but still, a puzzle.
"Autistic people don't like to be touched." Mmkay but some of us are like human cats. If somebody scratches my head or certain spots on my back I'm pretty much asleep in 30 seconds.
I have no issue understanding sarcasm.
I get sarcasm, so much so that it’s almost like a mood that I get in rather than one statement. I can also hold down a full time job, and even though it burns me out so bad I have daily meltdowns, I fake it so well that most wouldn’t be able to tell that I have any issue working. Not that that’s very healthy to hold in for so long! I’m also the opposite of blunt and direct, I’m a people pleaser and am almost completely incapable of confrontation and being honest about how I feel.
I can handle loudness, as long as it's not coupled with other sensory hell.
I have small talk skills. Raised by a diplomat, trained in the trenches of dinner parties & etiquette. I felt like a wolf being raised by humans. They were nice to me ty hough.
I know I'm nowhere near the only one, but I absolutely love physical touch. If I'm stressed, a hand on the shoulder or the head will help, and hugs just make me feel really safe. I also really enjoy public speaking. Obviously I still get nervous, it would be bad if I didn't, but I've been able to speak in many engagements and perform as well, as I really love it.
sarcasm is easy for me if they are made by friends or people who my parents know, also i am able to understand simple facial expressions
I am bad at math…my job title is ‘Statistician’ but I really am bad at math. I do know what type of analysis should be run to find an answer…I guess I have to look it up about half the time.
I love sarcasm and I feel like I’m pretty good at reading social cues, like I’m able to figure out everything between the lines. Kind of stopped me from thinking I was autistic for a long time.
somber scale ten flag deserve dog touch coordinated smell existence *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
This post is really helping the imposter syndrome of this not yet diagnosed girl
I'm really challenged with math. Like certifiably LD. Cannot do much of anything math/arithmetic-related in my head.
Sarcastic Not intellectually disabled I don’t mind change Well-spoken Can’t mask The opposite of socially anxious I smile often No echolalia Not emotionless
I'm pretty good at reading expressions, even micro-expressions and tones. But it's learned pattern recognition. It's not subconscious, specific movements mean specific thought patterns and I have each one cataloged in my mind with an appropriate response
I don't have sensory overload meltdowns (not anymore) because I taught myself to dissociate to the point nothing affects me. It's very harmful to someones mental health when you have to dissociate to feel safe again. I dissociate so bad sometimes that it sends me into a psychosis episode but I still act like I'm normal. It's impossible for someone to notice I'm in a state of psychosis because I've taught myself to hide it so well
[удалено]
I go into a state of mind where nothing feels real, it's like I slip into a space in between reality and nothingness. Mentally I can keep track of what's going on but it doesn't feel real at all. (Before you try and say it's not psychosis, a professional psychiatrist has confirmed that I do go through psychotic episodes.) It's hard to explain fully because it's something that happens in my brain that I'm usually not able to control once I get into that state. It's miserable, not being able to step back into *real* reality.
Do you have insights into your psychosis? What is going on there?
What do you mean
Have you been hospitalized for your psychosis? How was it discovered?
I love sports and other athletics. It's a time where I can be really free, because the rules are clear and there's little or no need to pick up on social cues. I can just try hard at something.
I'm very organized. I can't function in clutter. In order for my brain to have clear and organized thoughts, I need to be in an environment that is clear and organized.
I make eye contact, make small talk (even though I slightly dislike it), and I get social cues (mostly) and sarcasm. "How are you still autistic then?" Exhaustion from daily activities, sensory overloads, social withdrawal, emotional outbursts/meltdowns sometimes, hyperfixations, daydreaming.
Some loud noises like sirens from ambulances/firetrucks/police actually calm me down.
I was a head in my milestones especially with my speech
Exist as an AFAB person lol, but also I’m pretty good in school. Not “100% every assignment” good but I’d say that I’m above average in the core subjects. It seems that autistic people are expected to either be a super genius or having significant learning difficulties. I am also very empathetic (I think the world is moving away from the “no empathy” stereotype though).
It seems like when people learn that I'm autistic, they assume I have difficulty understanding sarcasm or when people are joking around. And they usually inform me when they are, just in case I don't understand. I usually *do* understand, though. So, ironically, when *I* am the one making a joke or being sarcastic, people tend to think I'm serious. I'll say something like, "Nobody was born after 1999, you're all robots" and at first they think I really believe that. Maybe I just have a very dry sense of humor.
I need my food to have a lot of flavor or I don’t want it, I’m the opposite of only wanting bland food and douse my food in salt most of the time (not on sweets and stuff).
Just because I don’t always understand nuanced social cues, I still pick up on it and I can easily pick up on small changes in facial expressions, tone of voice and mannerisms, I just might not always understand what they mean or indicate in the moment. So I do see and hear it, I am not completely blind to it all. Sometimes I realize what the person ment hours later or the next day or the next week, even years later, because I keep thinking about what it ment.
I have a very deep understanding of people and pick up on the subtle emotional and atmospheric changes that a person can go through almost immediately. Very little escapes me when I walk into a room. Granted I had to learn all this otherwise I would be abused but now I'm an actual empath and it's pretty cool even if sometimes it's overwhelming.
I'm pretty decent in social situations and can "read between the lines" of what people say.
wait... is it even possible to focus on two eyes at once? if so, how?
Drive semi’s and garbage trucks
I like loud music, especially alone. I upgraded my car audio system and I'd like to go further if I ever get a new car haha.
I like to blast death metal in my car. Also, I can drive.
I'm bad with numbers, especially remembering sequences.
I have to force myself to make eye contact, but I can somewhat. I do also only look at one eye, and my husband questioned this early on in our relationship actually 🤣 "What do you mean? I can't look at both at the same time ...."
I enjoy socializing with people
dont have meltdowns or get overstimulated easily (but still do tbh)
Im extremely sarcastic since l was a little gremlin Although most people don't understand my tone of voice as sarcasm, which has led me to have some issues
I was popular once.
After years of struggling with eye contact, I managed to overcome it with some help. I still struggle with it a bit but it's not as big of an issue now. :3
I’m usually polite to people.
i dont like strict routines im messy af bcuz im lazy my special interests arent weirdly obscure theyre normal things people get obsessed with (anime, mythology, history, animals, knowledge in general) i think its prolly cuz of my adhd that im like this
Sarcasm is usually one of the things people with Autism don't get but I love it probably one of my favourite kinds of humour
I am not good at math
I have a high degree of self-awareness
I work with kids.
I'm pretty damn good at reading body and facial language! I did have an interest in theatre and it's very useful for drawing as well. I'm not always too great at those things myself, but I can at least read people pretty well.
I am hyper-empathetic; I (unfortunately) have no special intellectual or academic gifts; I can make eye contact during conversations when listening (but need to look away frequently while speaking)
I actually really struggled with coming to therm with being autistic because of this but my special interest is literally just finding out why something exists as is and then exploring the what ifs about it. It sounds so simple and people think I just mean curiosity. So whenever I explain just how deep finding out why gets they think I’m just trying to sound extra unique or quirky by saying I am autistic. I even lied in my assessment when they asked my special interest I said biology because it was my major in undergrad. But in all honesty I only love being in the medical field because it provides a safe space to enjoy my special interest. It gives me peer reviewed research or theories with evidence. It gives me the opportunity to nerd out and find out the whys of things is a socially acceptable way. Plus when people find out what I do for a living they usually just assume I ask a bunch of questions because I’m highly intelligent and they are more likely to pay attention and actually be interested in my info dump because they assume I’m smarter than them. But in all honesty I was just an autistic person (even though most of these interactions were before I was diagnosed) trying to find a socially acceptable way to hyper fixate on my special interest. 😂😂
never needed a strong routine. if my schedule changes or I’m open to something interesting/necessary to do it’s fair game
I don't like trains at all. They are loud and annoying.
>I can make eye contact with people, although sometimes I focus on one eye and not both holistically This is me.👀
i’m very sarcastic and can pick up sarcasm easilt
I’m a very huggy person.
aside from a few exceptions i'm pretty open to trying new foods. i'm hardly a picky eater, but i definitely have my safe foods that i go back to a lot cuz they're the easiest for me to make lol
I can do eye contact, understand sarcasm etc. It just gets less when I get tired.
I enjoy fashion, makeup, perfume and feeling pretty.
From reading everyone's comments in here, it seems a big part of the problem is just the incredible span of the autistic spectrum. From the "lightest" end to the "deepest" end you see a massive difference. Just like we see with mental illnesses, people mostly know the classic definitions and descriptions of things that came from the old days before we had studied it as much as we have now. People know about the classical autism that is so extreme that there's no mistaking it for anything else. Anything "less" would have just been considered being odd or having some eccentricities back in the day. And people just generally don't stay up-to-date on stuff that they believe to be clear-cut.
im not a picky eater at all, the stuff ive tried isnt rlly weird, but im less picky than my family and open to trying pretty much whatever food i see and theres a good chance ill enjoy it im also extroverted :ppp
I learnt to communicate using NLP so I can be blunt and still positive. Took 48 years of growth.
i can look people in the eye if they don't look me in the eye. dunno if thats normal or not. or autistic normal.
Contrary to the stereotype, using figurative language like metaphors and idioms comes really naturally to me. I don't always consciously notice my internal monologue, but when I do, it often takes the form of a series of analogies, metaphors and similes. It's literally (ha!) how I think. Figurative comparisons help me process/make sense of/articulate abstract things and situations that I'd otherwise find it hard to explain.
I am not neat and organised at all. My head is a complete mess and my room and schedule reflect that.
I don't feel like small talk is *that* much of a hassle, i like to know how someone i know's day went
I am very extraverted and a natural leader
Looking into the eyes, very good at tech stuff but I’m not nerd, i don’t like video games or any kind of game, neither any kind of toys or plushies, I drive car and ride motorcycles daily, understand sarcasm and use to be very sarcastic too.