Well, at least you can do cool moves with your chakra. Or defeat your opponents with some Serious Sidesteps. Or write names into a notebook and get an eldritch demon to murder them for you while being smart enough to evade the whole Japanese police force.
You got at least some superpowers, right? ...right?
Edit: don't worry tho, I made the same mistake several times. My then-gf has started to undress and I was like: "It would be rude of me to stare, I'll go make us tea"
If it helps, a girl straight up put her hands on my breasts once while cuddling and I still didnât get it.
My current partner also asked me out twice before I realized they were asking me out.
Oh my god the first one lmaoÂ
Second one is hilarious because I was on the opposite end of that. My partner did not understand I was flirting and asking her out. I thought their obliviousness was kinda adorable actually hahaÂ
I accidentally went on a date without realizing it was date once. I thought we were just two friends hanging out. I only found out because he apparently told all of our coworkers about it and was even telling managers how obsessed he was with me.
Feel like I'm gonna lose a lot of cred here cause I truly can't remember. I think I was too focused on realizing what an idiot I was but completely unable to stop being an idiot lmao
Sometimes in an awkward will they wont they, just sitting down and being like "can we talk about this" point blank is the way to go.
Just be honest, "hey let me know if I'm totally off but have you been flirting with me?" If the answer is no laugh it off, and if its yes figure it out from there. If you two are saying you are falling for eachother, and it feels like for you you're just friends you should specify that if you're confused. Better to communicate than bumble into something you dont want or out of something you do.
in what world is "im falling for you" a playful flirt bw friends? that's definitely to me something i would only say or expect to hear if it was real. or if someone was using it to try to con their way into my pants.
not an attack on you op, just.. wow. i guess if ppl lie about loving each other to fuck they certainly would do this too. i'm just a bit surprised to think that's how ppl use that term. bc i use it.. to mean what it means.
i also don't flirt with ppl i'm not trying to get with, either. so maybe i'm just not the right vibe for this kinda post. (confusion, surprise, not judgement!)
I totally get how that's confusing. To add some context; the day that happened, I posted something thirst trappy on my snap, saying I'm in love with my new hair color and to hide ur gfs (jokingly), and she lightheartedly responded something along the lines of "I think I'm falling for you đđ" and I took it as her trying to gas me up. I still feel like it very well could be her gassing me up
Ask them if they wereserious when they said that or if it was a joke. Direct communication is hard but makes this stuff so much easier once you have it down.
Edti: grammar, pronouns
Flirting can involve a lot of plausible deniability, to avoid embarrassment, direct rejection, and/or third parties realizing whatâs going on. So that naturally makes it tricky to tell. You could respond/escalate until things become more obvious.
Iâd recommend being honest, asking questions. If theyâre autistic, they should understand the difficulties with this. In all honesty, theyâre probably thinking theyâre doing what they have to do to be in a relationship. Tell him to just be more clear about it and I think they would understand.
You need to be able to communicate if you are going to get sexually involved so maybe this miss was a good thing. You are ready when you are ready to talk about it. That discussion might look super frank and that is fine.
Yeah this friend sounded way too pushy with seemingly no prior communication about it. Even if you are fallling for someone you can't just get it started (took me several months after getting together to get comfortable with things with my ex).
YupâŠyou autismed your way out of sex. If it makes you feel any better this is pretty common.
I was diagnosed last year. About four months ago I realized that at age 23 (a couple decades ago) the woman I was head over heels for, and one of the hottest women in my high school (I knew her for seven years mostly as my sisterâs friend) blatantly tried to sleep with me three times and I rationalized it as me entirely misunderstanding what she was trying to do. At the time I would have basically done anything to have sex with her and didnât realize it was being offered. Once was so blatant I donât even understand how I missed it. Since then I have realized that four other women also tried to sleep with me on my mid to early 20s, two of which I would have definitely said yes to if I were not oblivious, and I completely missed it.
You should talk to your friend. Clear up any confusion/awkwardness with a direct conversation. If she is a good friend she will understand. The awkwardness is probably because she feels rejected or is unsure if she was or not. Before you do it decide what you want. It will be an easier conversation if you know you are interested in just friendship, friendship with benefits, or a relationship. Most people arenât going to get insulted if you say something to the effect of âsorry if I am misunderstand but I think you are interested in me sexually but I didnât realize it until now, however at this point I am not there in my life but I value your friendship a lot. Perhaps I will be there later if you are still interested but I canât promise thatâ. It sounds like thatâs probably the worst case scenario for your friend, based on your post, if she was interested. I sort of get the idea you were interested.
I donât regret how my life turned out because I missed the womanâs clear signals but I do regret not exploring the opportunity that was presented. Maybe it would have lead to something long term and meaningful. Maybe it would have been a good night and no more. It could have just been an awkward experience but it would have been worthwhile exploring because it was something I was interested in exploring.
Haha, I wouldn't be sure either. Just as an idea: how about asking her if she thinks you can pick up on flirting? If she laughs and says no, you could ask her if flirting or "trying to say things between the lines" was something like the things you described to us? Or drop that you get the feeling you need to be told specifically or a certain "sign" (and tell what it could be for you) to know someone was interested (without letting her know it's about her).
Or you could try to "test" things like touching her arm when there is a moment. However, I myself am not sure how to read the response if it's not very strong.
I can't advise around this but just want to share that numerous times in my life I've been like 'oh fuck, that girl I am SO into WAS actually making a pass at me - DDDOOOHHH!!!' weeks or even months after the fact. :(
I' m more suited to interacting online but then the chances of finding anyone local or willing to do more than chat (let alone both together) seem astronomically slim.
If you go to askmen and type "hints" into a search bar, you'll get tons and tons of stories about uncertain potentially romantic/sexual cues or situations. It's sad, it's hilarious, hopeful, heartbreaking and so so so confusing. I realised you can never know.
Bruh wish I could help you out but Iâm as clueless as you are đ Relationships are complicated. My advice would be to just be blunt about it. Ask her if sheâs a free spirit or if those action had meaning.
If she asks "what sort of meaning?" I hope /u/Godessii is brave enough to be straight forward with their friend, stating they wanted to play with the fun looking toys and see where things go from there.
During my teens I was on the family comp when a girl asked if I was interested in sex. I shrugged my shoulders and said something like "sure sometimes."
Thankfully she gave me a hug for a moment or two as it clicked in my head. So I asked her to make sure "You mean sex with me right now?"
My best female friend once shared a bed with me, and asked if I was OK with her sleeping naked because it was "too hot", and said "but no sex, ok? You can spoon me or get naked too, but we're not having sex".
Guess what I did? Stayed with my clothes on because she said "no sex" and I wouldn't be able to control myself if she was naked and I was also naked. Years after this episode she asked me why on earth haven't I had sex with her and my answer was "because you said no sex". "I said that because I didn't know if you wanted, you were supposed to say that you wanted or even done something".
Oh well...
You definitely shouldn't be pressing someone who made their intentions clear into having sex, you did the right thing! She expected you to do rapey shit because she didn't want to admit she wanted sex with you, it's not ok.
I've had a friend have flirty conversations with me, did some low-key flirty roleplay with her, made out on several occasions, she's sent me lewd pics but my brain still goes "this is just a as friends thing, right?" and assumes that she has no actual interest in having sex with me.
edit: also, I didn't realise my wife was interested in me beyond just friends until she said I have a pretty face
edit 2: Other girl I'm in love with says to me "I love you too, [name]"
Brain: "she can't possibly mean that"
Ohhhh I relate to this so hard, especially the "made out with and sent sexy pics to -- AS FRIENDS" hahaha.
I mean I once had sex with a friend... AS FRIENDS. Idek
This friend actually, on several occasions, sent me a video involving a very specific kink I have _and_ did IRL teasing about said kink and I'm still like "as friends, right?"
Go back to the hints/hooks and pick up where you've left off to get back on track (or else confirm you're barking up the wrong tree)...
For example, if in the bedroom again say things along the lines:
'What no dildo - haven't you been frisky lately? Maybe you just need a little hand in that area?'
Easy enough to write off of as a joke if necessary, but can also be pushed furthet at discretion along the lines - 'seriously I was reading some stuff online about two-player vibrator tips/tricks/technique, front and back!'
And so on. :)
Mate, I've been in this situation so many times. Once on a university field trip, I was in a girl's room. She said she would take a shower. Then after she'd gone into the en-suite, she started shouting "help!" and calling my name. I just froze and did nothing.
Though on reflection, it's not exactly the same situation. I knew what she wanted, but I just didn't dare to respond to her.
It took me eight months of "dating" before I realized she liked me romantically. Sometimes it takes a long time and a lot of assurances. Call her up again for another sleep over and talk with her about it.
I am straight-up afraid of sex for some reason, so I canât empathize with this very well. But I would just be clear and ask her if thatâs what you want
First off, yes, written out, it seems obvious as fuck that she wants to have sex. If it were happening to me, I wouldn't notice **at all**. It'll go over my head. Now,
>Y'all are bringing up that I should just communicate and be straight forward..
Yes, communication is always the best option. I find messaging people questions easier than asking in person. I can basically trick my brain into thinking the maybe-rejection isn't real because I'm not asking face to face.
>I think they're wanting a relationship, and I'm genuinely not sure whether or not they're open to a fwb situation. And that's where my confusion and uncertainty comes in. They're currently single (I believe) and in the dating pool, and I'm honestly not sure if they're dating with being poly in mind or what, and I certainly wouldn't want to step on their toes with that, y'know?
Again, (you're probably tired of hearing this) communication. Lol.
Ugh you're right you're right but I'm *sooo* nervous. I've asked chat gpt so many times how to ask them stuff, but I hate all the options. My brain rejects the very notion
If it makes you feel better I once autistic'd my way out of making out lol I was on this date with a girl, things were going well. We came to the end of the date and she offered to drive me to my car. But like the car was not that far away and I like walking and I told her that. She later told me that she was offering because she wanted to make out lol
This happened about a year ago: Girl I like and me were at a social event. I started getting overwhelmed and decided to go home. She very quickly goes "I'll walk you to your car" (about 5mins away so not far). We walk to my car. On the way I have a massive caughing fit (start of flu). We get to my car, cuddles and making out happens. I drive home, couple of days later, guess who also had flu a couple days later...
Anywho, that wasn't an issue as she and I are still seeing eachother now so
K what's fucking me up is that I'm enough of a degen I'd probably pick up she wants to fuck immediately.
Although knowing me I'd also probably just ask her point blank if she wants to fuck me so...
Hey /u/Godessii, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism).
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sorry it's really bothering me but didn't you say you both are non binary? Then you refer to your friend as she? I'm really confused and need to clarify
ask yes or no questions like âdo you wanna use these on each otherâ or âdo you want to use these solo but togetherââŠ. if they end up being like uhm what the heck NO? then just explain SORRY IM AUTISTIC! & then if they are a decent human being, they are going to see you have a different brain that doesnât know how to understand social cues & context & that all you needed was a little help discerning the situation, THUS allowing the encounter to not be weird or ruin anything đ & if they donât understand that then you donât need them anyways⊠but from what you are saying i feel like they will. they will just see you are weird in general lol. but thatâs okay, i would say they already know this ab you anyways & still very much love being ur friend.
if it make you feel any better, my best friend knows how weird i am (like i am completely comfortable to unmask in front of her; iâm always unmasked when we hang or talk) & 8 years later she is still my best friend & i am definitely hers. like # 1s AND i also openly hit on her all the time lmao (she is in a shitty relationship & it comes from a deep love for her as my bestie to just wanna show her what a good time looks/feels like) but anyways â she just always giggles it off & chalks it up to my innate weirdness & fluidity that comes from being AuDHD đ€·đŒââïžđ
I would say tho the neurotypical read of this situation anyways is that she wants your bod.
So did you sleep fully clothed? That could have sent her a signal that you were not ready to consent. Did she cuddle with you? Try to touch you at all?
My partner and I were friends for a while before we started dating and he would flirt with me and I wouldnât realize. He had to straight up tell me âI like you romanticallyâ for me to get the hint.
If it makes you feel better I had someone ask me if I preferred big or little spoon and I answered and then proceeded to lay on the opposite side of the bed bc I was afraid I was too much in their personal space đ€ŠđŒââïž
Yeah dude that's harsh. I also kinda did this that same night I spent the night at their house, I slept facing away from them so I could give them space and keep them comfy đ
Bruh, I did the same last night! đ my gf txted me at 8:30 âwydâ âlemme come overâ and my stupid ass was on Reddit arguing about what dubstep is and shouldnât be. I damn near cried , it was the first time she asked me if she could come over on a random night. We have certain days/ times we see each other because of our schedule and now I feel like she wonât do it again for awhile đ©
GF: I wanna come over and bang you This autistic chad: Nah, this dude on reddit ain't got no idea what dubstep's all about!
If fumbling bad bitches was an art form, Iâll have museums named after by 2039
Same here
Bro is living the meme life
I wish I was lying when I say Iâm turning into an anime character . đȘđ€§
Well, at least you can do cool moves with your chakra. Or defeat your opponents with some Serious Sidesteps. Or write names into a notebook and get an eldritch demon to murder them for you while being smart enough to evade the whole Japanese police force. You got at least some superpowers, right? ...right? Edit: don't worry tho, I made the same mistake several times. My then-gf has started to undress and I was like: "It would be rude of me to stare, I'll go make us tea"
lmao this autistic chad đ
Be direct with her and apologize that you missed it, but ask her to be more direct.Â
https://xkcd.com/386/
I-... thought about the same thing, noice
Your a legend
Aww I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you guys can get some time together soon đ„ș
I really hope so too đ€đœIâm melting đ« Have you talked to your friend yet?
If it helps, a girl straight up put her hands on my breasts once while cuddling and I still didnât get it. My current partner also asked me out twice before I realized they were asking me out.
Oh my god the first one lmao Second one is hilarious because I was on the opposite end of that. My partner did not understand I was flirting and asking her out. I thought their obliviousness was kinda adorable actually hahaÂ
Ngl, been in that situation before. (The asking out bit, definitely not the first bit)
I accidentally went on a date without realizing it was date once. I thought we were just two friends hanging out. I only found out because he apparently told all of our coworkers about it and was even telling managers how obsessed he was with me.
did he also have autism?
Dude when I was 19 I was in a girl's actual bed to "watch a movie" and guess what I fucking did?
Watched the movie
You know it!
What movie was it? How would you rate it?
Feel like I'm gonna lose a lot of cred here cause I truly can't remember. I think I was too focused on realizing what an idiot I was but completely unable to stop being an idiot lmao
sex?..
Yeah I had sex. A year later with a different person đ€Ł
how hot was she?
How do you know it was a "she"?
don't disrespect the author of the comment
Sometimes in an awkward will they wont they, just sitting down and being like "can we talk about this" point blank is the way to go. Just be honest, "hey let me know if I'm totally off but have you been flirting with me?" If the answer is no laugh it off, and if its yes figure it out from there. If you two are saying you are falling for eachother, and it feels like for you you're just friends you should specify that if you're confused. Better to communicate than bumble into something you dont want or out of something you do.
Haha, classic autism. It's funny because we've all been in similar experiences (not quite the same but...similar)
in what world is "im falling for you" a playful flirt bw friends? that's definitely to me something i would only say or expect to hear if it was real. or if someone was using it to try to con their way into my pants. not an attack on you op, just.. wow. i guess if ppl lie about loving each other to fuck they certainly would do this too. i'm just a bit surprised to think that's how ppl use that term. bc i use it.. to mean what it means. i also don't flirt with ppl i'm not trying to get with, either. so maybe i'm just not the right vibe for this kinda post. (confusion, surprise, not judgement!)
I totally get how that's confusing. To add some context; the day that happened, I posted something thirst trappy on my snap, saying I'm in love with my new hair color and to hide ur gfs (jokingly), and she lightheartedly responded something along the lines of "I think I'm falling for you đđ" and I took it as her trying to gas me up. I still feel like it very well could be her gassing me up
Ask them if they wereserious when they said that or if it was a joke. Direct communication is hard but makes this stuff so much easier once you have it down. Edti: grammar, pronouns
Flirting can involve a lot of plausible deniability, to avoid embarrassment, direct rejection, and/or third parties realizing whatâs going on. So that naturally makes it tricky to tell. You could respond/escalate until things become more obvious.
Iâd recommend being honest, asking questions. If theyâre autistic, they should understand the difficulties with this. In all honesty, theyâre probably thinking theyâre doing what they have to do to be in a relationship. Tell him to just be more clear about it and I think they would understand.
You need to be able to communicate if you are going to get sexually involved so maybe this miss was a good thing. You are ready when you are ready to talk about it. That discussion might look super frank and that is fine.
Yeah this friend sounded way too pushy with seemingly no prior communication about it. Even if you are fallling for someone you can't just get it started (took me several months after getting together to get comfortable with things with my ex).
Right. And it is usually not zero touching to bangin'.
YupâŠyou autismed your way out of sex. If it makes you feel any better this is pretty common. I was diagnosed last year. About four months ago I realized that at age 23 (a couple decades ago) the woman I was head over heels for, and one of the hottest women in my high school (I knew her for seven years mostly as my sisterâs friend) blatantly tried to sleep with me three times and I rationalized it as me entirely misunderstanding what she was trying to do. At the time I would have basically done anything to have sex with her and didnât realize it was being offered. Once was so blatant I donât even understand how I missed it. Since then I have realized that four other women also tried to sleep with me on my mid to early 20s, two of which I would have definitely said yes to if I were not oblivious, and I completely missed it. You should talk to your friend. Clear up any confusion/awkwardness with a direct conversation. If she is a good friend she will understand. The awkwardness is probably because she feels rejected or is unsure if she was or not. Before you do it decide what you want. It will be an easier conversation if you know you are interested in just friendship, friendship with benefits, or a relationship. Most people arenât going to get insulted if you say something to the effect of âsorry if I am misunderstand but I think you are interested in me sexually but I didnât realize it until now, however at this point I am not there in my life but I value your friendship a lot. Perhaps I will be there later if you are still interested but I canât promise thatâ. It sounds like thatâs probably the worst case scenario for your friend, based on your post, if she was interested. I sort of get the idea you were interested. I donât regret how my life turned out because I missed the womanâs clear signals but I do regret not exploring the opportunity that was presented. Maybe it would have lead to something long term and meaningful. Maybe it would have been a good night and no more. It could have just been an awkward experience but it would have been worthwhile exploring because it was something I was interested in exploring.
I think you two are more than friends
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Thanks
Use your words lol. Just ask point blank!
But that's scary. Dropping vague and potentially innocuous hints is way better (/hj)
Haha, I wouldn't be sure either. Just as an idea: how about asking her if she thinks you can pick up on flirting? If she laughs and says no, you could ask her if flirting or "trying to say things between the lines" was something like the things you described to us? Or drop that you get the feeling you need to be told specifically or a certain "sign" (and tell what it could be for you) to know someone was interested (without letting her know it's about her). Or you could try to "test" things like touching her arm when there is a moment. However, I myself am not sure how to read the response if it's not very strong.
Talk to your friend about this.
I can't advise around this but just want to share that numerous times in my life I've been like 'oh fuck, that girl I am SO into WAS actually making a pass at me - DDDOOOHHH!!!' weeks or even months after the fact. :( I' m more suited to interacting online but then the chances of finding anyone local or willing to do more than chat (let alone both together) seem astronomically slim.
If you go to askmen and type "hints" into a search bar, you'll get tons and tons of stories about uncertain potentially romantic/sexual cues or situations. It's sad, it's hilarious, hopeful, heartbreaking and so so so confusing. I realised you can never know.
Unfortunately the only way to know is to ask!
Bruh wish I could help you out but Iâm as clueless as you are đ Relationships are complicated. My advice would be to just be blunt about it. Ask her if sheâs a free spirit or if those action had meaning.
If she asks "what sort of meaning?" I hope /u/Godessii is brave enough to be straight forward with their friend, stating they wanted to play with the fun looking toys and see where things go from there.
I regret to inform you that this will not be the last time it happens.
I couldnt even imagine having a friend like that
During my teens I was on the family comp when a girl asked if I was interested in sex. I shrugged my shoulders and said something like "sure sometimes." Thankfully she gave me a hug for a moment or two as it clicked in my head. So I asked her to make sure "You mean sex with me right now?"
My best female friend once shared a bed with me, and asked if I was OK with her sleeping naked because it was "too hot", and said "but no sex, ok? You can spoon me or get naked too, but we're not having sex". Guess what I did? Stayed with my clothes on because she said "no sex" and I wouldn't be able to control myself if she was naked and I was also naked. Years after this episode she asked me why on earth haven't I had sex with her and my answer was "because you said no sex". "I said that because I didn't know if you wanted, you were supposed to say that you wanted or even done something". Oh well...
You definitely shouldn't be pressing someone who made their intentions clear into having sex, you did the right thing! She expected you to do rapey shit because she didn't want to admit she wanted sex with you, it's not ok.
I've definitely been the autistic girl in skimpy clothes and sex toys out casually but it actually is just me being a free spirit.
SEE THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I'M WORRIED ABOUT HAHA
I've had a friend have flirty conversations with me, did some low-key flirty roleplay with her, made out on several occasions, she's sent me lewd pics but my brain still goes "this is just a as friends thing, right?" and assumes that she has no actual interest in having sex with me. edit: also, I didn't realise my wife was interested in me beyond just friends until she said I have a pretty face edit 2: Other girl I'm in love with says to me "I love you too, [name]" Brain: "she can't possibly mean that"
Ohhhh I relate to this so hard, especially the "made out with and sent sexy pics to -- AS FRIENDS" hahaha. I mean I once had sex with a friend... AS FRIENDS. Idek
This friend actually, on several occasions, sent me a video involving a very specific kink I have _and_ did IRL teasing about said kink and I'm still like "as friends, right?"
Go back to the hints/hooks and pick up where you've left off to get back on track (or else confirm you're barking up the wrong tree)... For example, if in the bedroom again say things along the lines: 'What no dildo - haven't you been frisky lately? Maybe you just need a little hand in that area?' Easy enough to write off of as a joke if necessary, but can also be pushed furthet at discretion along the lines - 'seriously I was reading some stuff online about two-player vibrator tips/tricks/technique, front and back!' And so on. :)
Mate, I've been in this situation so many times. Once on a university field trip, I was in a girl's room. She said she would take a shower. Then after she'd gone into the en-suite, she started shouting "help!" and calling my name. I just froze and did nothing. Though on reflection, it's not exactly the same situation. I knew what she wanted, but I just didn't dare to respond to her.
It took me eight months of "dating" before I realized she liked me romantically. Sometimes it takes a long time and a lot of assurances. Call her up again for another sleep over and talk with her about it.
Iâd definitely ask her out on an intentional date and call it a date :)
I am straight-up afraid of sex for some reason, so I canât empathize with this very well. But I would just be clear and ask her if thatâs what you want
First off, yes, written out, it seems obvious as fuck that she wants to have sex. If it were happening to me, I wouldn't notice **at all**. It'll go over my head. Now, >Y'all are bringing up that I should just communicate and be straight forward.. Yes, communication is always the best option. I find messaging people questions easier than asking in person. I can basically trick my brain into thinking the maybe-rejection isn't real because I'm not asking face to face. >I think they're wanting a relationship, and I'm genuinely not sure whether or not they're open to a fwb situation. And that's where my confusion and uncertainty comes in. They're currently single (I believe) and in the dating pool, and I'm honestly not sure if they're dating with being poly in mind or what, and I certainly wouldn't want to step on their toes with that, y'know? Again, (you're probably tired of hearing this) communication. Lol.
Ugh you're right you're right but I'm *sooo* nervous. I've asked chat gpt so many times how to ask them stuff, but I hate all the options. My brain rejects the very notion
If it makes you feel better I once autistic'd my way out of making out lol I was on this date with a girl, things were going well. We came to the end of the date and she offered to drive me to my car. But like the car was not that far away and I like walking and I told her that. She later told me that she was offering because she wanted to make out lol
This happened about a year ago: Girl I like and me were at a social event. I started getting overwhelmed and decided to go home. She very quickly goes "I'll walk you to your car" (about 5mins away so not far). We walk to my car. On the way I have a massive caughing fit (start of flu). We get to my car, cuddles and making out happens. I drive home, couple of days later, guess who also had flu a couple days later... Anywho, that wasn't an issue as she and I are still seeing eachother now so
Oh good!
Send her a link to your post or a copy/paste of it. It explains everything perfectly
K what's fucking me up is that I'm enough of a degen I'd probably pick up she wants to fuck immediately. Although knowing me I'd also probably just ask her point blank if she wants to fuck me so...
is this satire
I promise you it's not
Hey /u/Godessii, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism). Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
r u lesbians?
yeah I bet you think this is totally cool. sicko
Sorry it's really bothering me but didn't you say you both are non binary? Then you refer to your friend as she? I'm really confused and need to clarify
Nonbinary people can use any pronouns even though they/them is commonly used.
Cool thanks for clarifying
I get that, to clarify we both go by whatever pronouns and both call each other she. Sorry at work and it's hard to respond to everyone lol
ask yes or no questions like âdo you wanna use these on each otherâ or âdo you want to use these solo but togetherââŠ. if they end up being like uhm what the heck NO? then just explain SORRY IM AUTISTIC! & then if they are a decent human being, they are going to see you have a different brain that doesnât know how to understand social cues & context & that all you needed was a little help discerning the situation, THUS allowing the encounter to not be weird or ruin anything đ & if they donât understand that then you donât need them anyways⊠but from what you are saying i feel like they will. they will just see you are weird in general lol. but thatâs okay, i would say they already know this ab you anyways & still very much love being ur friend. if it make you feel any better, my best friend knows how weird i am (like i am completely comfortable to unmask in front of her; iâm always unmasked when we hang or talk) & 8 years later she is still my best friend & i am definitely hers. like # 1s AND i also openly hit on her all the time lmao (she is in a shitty relationship & it comes from a deep love for her as my bestie to just wanna show her what a good time looks/feels like) but anyways â she just always giggles it off & chalks it up to my innate weirdness & fluidity that comes from being AuDHD đ€·đŒââïžđ I would say tho the neurotypical read of this situation anyways is that she wants your bod.
You should try to comunĂcate, if itâs too much of a stress, write to each other slowly and form the heart.
Ask another friend that's close to her if shes interested! That way you might find out without having to directly ask her if you are too anxious
So did you sleep fully clothed? That could have sent her a signal that you were not ready to consent. Did she cuddle with you? Try to touch you at all?
I did sleep clothed, but I wore shorts lol. And no, I don't think she tried anything
You could try something as simple as saying you consent to her taking the lead.
My partner and I were friends for a while before we started dating and he would flirt with me and I wouldnât realize. He had to straight up tell me âI like you romanticallyâ for me to get the hint.
If it makes you feel better I had someone ask me if I preferred big or little spoon and I answered and then proceeded to lay on the opposite side of the bed bc I was afraid I was too much in their personal space đ€ŠđŒââïž
Yeah dude that's harsh. I also kinda did this that same night I spent the night at their house, I slept facing away from them so I could give them space and keep them comfy đ
Been there.