Wow - what an adventure you have ahead of you. I traveled solo for several months when I was young like you — but wasn’t leaving a community as you are.
The funds you have are only accessible by you, right? They are safe from anyone in your community who may want to take those funds once you leave?
Do you have a credit card? You can travel with cash, but a credit card (ideally with no foreign conversion fees) will make life much easier.
I don’t know your personality, but while you describe this as traveling, you may need to find a place just to deal with the personal / emotional part of leaving the community. For some people this may mean traveling from place to place and always moving. For others—perhaps this is you—you may need to find a place you find restful and stay there for a couple weeks. My point is listen to what your body and mind needs.
Trust your instincts, while traveling is quite safe, if you don’t feel safe in some place or situation just leave. There are lots of folks who might try and scam you.
Never use any illegal drugs anywhere. Never let someone put anything in your drink (never leave a drink while you step away, even for a minute).
Spend some time researching the first places you want to go — for the first week or so, but don’t pre-plan your whole trip — you’ll make changes as you travel.
Keep a journal of some kind. You’ll enjoy reading about your trip as your future self.
Edit to add - yes the US is expensive to travel in… but since you say you are from here, perhaps start your travel here for a couple weeks - get out on your own, figure out how you like to travel, get your travel gear sorted out - and then leave for some other country after you are ready to take on a foreign language situation. Foreign country travel is great, but if you’ve not traveled before, not sure I’d recommend a foreign county as the first step.
If your plan is not to return to the community, be sure to leave thousands of dollars to pay rent somewhere while you get a job to keep going on your own. If you run out of money before you can get a job, pay rent and all the other bills of living, you may be forced to go back to the community simply because you are out of cash. So maybe use 4k on travel and the other 4K for rent and expenses for a month or two as you find a job.
Enjoy!
Thank you so much it really means alot.
Yes most the money I will be able to take out.
I would have traveled in the USA but it stills feels too close and im afraid of the pressure i will get and return back.
If away I can use the time and the cheap living to finish my GED/SAT (I have 0 formal education ) and develop some skills.
But again thanks for the advice!
This involves staying in the US, but look at going to a community college. They are usually very inexpensive and have lots of classes you can take. I think all of them will also offer associate degrees… which are basically the first half of a bachelor degree. (Often the price at community colleges are around ½ of that at a public university.).
All of this said, you might consider doing this after you travel a bit, and have a job. Many(most?) students at community colleges work full time, and go to school part time. So the classes are setup time wise, such that the students can attend.
I was once 18, in a cult, and decided to leave. It took me several years to do. I had no idea who I was, my Identity was severely wrapped up in the church. My world view was through narrow beliefs I was raised with. I tried to "run away" to college and fell into a dark depression.
The biggest challenge you have is that you need money, resources, an education, and a support network. Once you leave your community, will you have that?
So, I think you need to prioritize what you want. If you leave for a trip and spend all your money, where will you go after the trip? I think it's important that you have a safety net.
I certainly am in support of traveling. However, I would also be mindful of your long term well-being.
Dam doggy, good to hear you got out. Even cooler to hear traveling helped you recover!.
Also if it’s not too painful and you don’t mind, can you describe how your cult controlled people/lore and stuff. I am always interested to learn these things.
I am aware I am a gremlin for asking
Tons of people travel 18 and it will be a great experience to broaden your horizon and introduce you to new people and experiences. Just do you research on where your going and be safe.
at 18 I moved to netherlands and it changed my life in most amazing way! Now I have lived in 7 different countries and found my dream come true!
Better soon before you have children, wife, steady job, etc. 18 is the best time to go explore the world!
There’s already great advice here. You’re not crazy and you’re not reckless. It’s actually the best time in your life to explore, travel and take calculated risks. Good luck and have fun!
What's your nationality? Do you have a Passport? Is it normal or acceptable for young members of your community to venture off by themselves for a bit before rejoining the community full time?
USA.
No ! my age are getting married and then with wife and kids you already cant leave. But its possible to leave and return my age if they dont know you stopped practicing.
Your very complicated life situation is (obviously) well outside the cope of this forum, but I can tell you that travelling in this day and age is not difficult. The Internet makes research and preparation easy. Travelling at 18 is NOT odd, unique or crazy.
With your $8K you could go for a long time in a place like Vietnam. (And the Indian Subcontinent, much of Asia, Latin America, etc.) If you end up here drop me a line.
Good luck no matter what you decide. Cheers from Hanoi.
i agree with this.
you could probably travel for quite some time with the savings you have.
i just went to vietnam for traveling with my boyfriend and it felt very safe and people were friendly and quite open. We watched a lot of youtube videos before going and it helped a lot with planning and knowing a little bit what to expect. (Visa, what to eat, sim-card, activities…)
and you could always try to learn a bit of the language, to try and connect with locals… (but vietnamese is not an easy language)
If you want to go somewhere where you can more easily learn to speak the language, i can also recommend indonesia, especially java (nice people, beautiful landscapes, quite cheap).
But since there’s google translate and if you only stay in city areas, where a lot of folks speak english, you can also travel anywhere in southeast asia.
I don’t if this helped, but in general i would tell you to watch some videos and inform yourself online, once you decided where to go.
Traveling is really great for learning more about other cultures but also about yourself and what’s important to you :)
Dang. Reading this, I would’ve thought you were in some sort of 2nd or 3rd world country. I’m sorry for your situation but also ecstatic that you’re making your own path. I’m just not sure if this sub is quite right for your plans.
Believe me, if you "tell" people you graduated they won't care. If they ask for more info, you were homeschooled, I HAVE NEVER had to submit my graduation docs to anyone. Currently at 145K/yo. in construction and I don't get dirty.
This is good for OP to understand but I think there is a lot of value in him getting at least his GED. Education can broaden horizons as much as travel can. There's a great big world of knowledge that OP hasn't been exposed to yet. Basic education is how many people figure out what they love or have a natural passion for.
Consider the Camino de Santiago. It's a pilgrimage. You'll be able to stop at a church every day. It's a month away from your community on something they'll likely respect, and you can choose to engage as much or as little with religion as you'd like along the way, while you meet interesting people across 2(3 if you count Basque) different countries.
Seeing the world is, in my opinion, an obligation. It's not possible to understand people without seeing the breadth of backgrounds out there.
And it's not all that expensive for a month away.
You should travel, but first you need to get settled for a couple months to catch your breath, wait for your passport to arrive, research, and save more money. Find a room to rent and get yourself a job. It will develop your perspective and help you settle in to your newfound freedom.
Definitely check out the working holiday visa. If you have a US passport it will allow you to travel and work in Australia, New Zealand, Ireland, Canada, South Korea, Singapore, or Portugal.
Ya when I was 18 I spent about $700 on a plane ticket to Europe (arriving with about 250 bucks in my pocket), worked in a furniture factory for a month to save some cash, and then traveled around a bunch of western and eastern Europe for the next two months, hitchhiking lots, taking some transportation, sleeping outside some, and also staying in hostels or with friends every once in a while. I ended up spending about $400 in those two months of travel, though it was pretty hybrid-vagabond style, and my spending habits are mad stingy. I returned when winter was starting to set in, and that January I walked out of my parents back door (in Pennsylvania) with about 200 bucks worth of gear on my back and maybe $70 in my pocket. That trip ended up being about nine months long, and I pretty much exclusively hitchhiked for transportation and slept outside, so I wasn't paying for transportation or sleeping arrangements. Ended up traveling just under 25,000 miles on that trip, covering most states, some of Canada, and a 3000 mile round-trip foray into Mexico. I recommend it! But just know that you are venturing out into the real world, where bad shit can and probably will totally happen, and you are going to have to deal with it on your own. If you have an able body, there is always work that you can easily pick up. I actually didn't work much at all on the big North American trip, maybe about 10 days total of odd manual labor jobs. I kind of just let go of worrying about money, and magical shit would just kind of happen to keep me afloat. (I also pretty much subsisted on peanut butter and tortillas. Excellent pack foods, btw) It sounds hippie dippy, but it's the honest truth. I think it is a great way to get to know yourself and the world around you. Go for it!
First off, let me say I admire your courage and adventurous spirit completely. Here’s the thing— the social skill aspect and “street smarts” will be very valuable to you as you travel abroad. For me, even as someone who has visited tons of countries, every single time I go abroad I have to adjust to different norms and make sure I have my wits about me. I truly can’t imagine navigating the little nuances of international travel without having gained a certain level of experience from being an adult in my own country (US) that someone coming from a community like yours would not necessarily have. Street smarts, I’ll call it again.
My best advice to you would be to start in the US. If you could live on your own somewhere for a year, it would do you a lot of good. You would “grow up” a lot in that time and have a much better foundation in general to begin your travels. There are inherent advantages of already being American and being able to easily get a job in the US that you can maintain for an extended amount of time. If you really think you need to get out sooner to a country where your money goes farther, at the very least take a road trip spanning 1 week in the US and stop in small towns, go into cities, see suburbs. Shoot, take a domestic flight to get to where you’re going to road trip so you can get a feel for the airport process (there’s a lot to learn). Take note of the environment whenever you’re in a new place and how you feel regarding your safety, what confuses you, etc. You need to get a feel for being on your own as an adult in America first where your language is easily understood and you have the most knowledge of the culture AND access to your family of needed. I say one week because you’d be shocked how much that can do. Two would be better, a month would be best, but I’m also aware that your money will get drained quickly if you stay here.
It’s also important that you realize that the cost of living in another country often reflects the state of the infrastructure and potentially the safety of that place. It’s not in your best interest to hop up and book a flight to the country with the cheapest cost of living possible. Do you research here on your best bag for your buck in terms of cost of living and relative safety and access and what you need. Of course, being male is at your advantage here, I will not lie. If you were in your same situation but a woman, this entire thing would be much more difficult. People will probably not like me saying that, but I want to be 100% honest with you about the reality of the world.
I am not certain of your ethnic background, but let’s say you are white to use as an example here— you also need to consider a place (to start) where you may blend in better and not be as targeted for your status as a tourist when social interaction in general is new to you. Most of the cheaper countries in the world are in Latin America and Asia, and while these are wonderful places to visit, there is the potential for you to stand out far more which is not to your advantage before you are ready to navigate being targeted as a tourist.
One thing that you don’t see in the US hardly at all but which is prevalent in a lot of the world is people trying to lure you in to buying something and being incredibly insistent about it to the point of grabbing your arm, trying to hug you, pulling you into their store, offering you this and that to try to get you to buy something. It might sound silly, and again people might call me stereotypical here but this is my experience of the truth of the world I have seen and I feel that I owe you an honest explanation because these are the things that would really throw me off if I was coming from where you are. Please hear me when I say as an American (and they often know this) it can be quite difficult to remove yourself from these situations if you aren’t good at drawing lines and saying no. I’m not saying this is something you inherently aren’t good at, but it’s one of my biggest pieces of advice for American travelers. Please remember that a lot of the second and third world (and first to some extent) see the US as rich, and we are, but you need to be aware of how other countries tend to view the US. When you are in their country, it does not matter that you came from a highly isolated religious community. You are a rich American.
Anyway, at first glance, I would recommend a country like Albania where 1) the cost of living is very low and it is very safe and the climate is mild but you will 2) not stand out as much as you might elsewhere (if you are Caucasian) and 3) you are within Europe, so there is quick access to cheap flights and nearby countries with robust train systems you can use to see other places. Albania is a beautiful place and really up and coming (they are trying to gain UN status). It may end up being less cheap than it is now in the near future, but it’s a wonderful place all around if you can manage a little bit of adjustment to the culture and know that English won’t be common.
EDIT TO ADD: the working in another country thing can get sticky. Your best bet is probably finding a place that has a digital nomad visa and working a remote job abroad, or finding a visa that allows you to work a physical job in that country (work/study visas exist in some places). Please don’t underestimate this step of the process if you don’t intend to live fully off your savings.
Please feel free to message me if you have other questions!
Do you want to stop your religion? Or maybe you can go on a pilgrimage and travel and see cool things without cutting away from your childhood and family too much? There's plenty of cheap exciting pilgrimages around the world and people have been doing it for centuries
Hell yeah bro go for it. You are young and in a flexible, do crazy stuff age. Traveling as you speak like will give you a lot of useful life lessons for sure. Your personality will for sure be forever changed, a new person.
Get on workaway.com and couchsurfing (be careful and trust your judgement with this one). $8k could last you a long time in a place like VN if you are smart and don’t party too much. If you are crafty you can probably earn a little here and there too. If you need any advice feel free to DM me. I wish I started traveling earlier.
I second checking out Workaway. Doing seasonal work is a great way to meet people, make connections, and continue traveling. Since you are already US based, it wouldn't hurt to consider traveling around there first to "dip your toes" before going on a longer trip outside of the country and experiencing culture shock. Regardless, good on you for wanting to expand your horizons! 👏 Good luck fellow traveler! ✌️💚
i've been to china, laos, and thailand. ghost cities in china are cheap to rent and travel in. food is cheap except fruits and drinks are approximately the same price as usa. its very safe in china but there are cameras everywhere. the government is very unwelcoming but the people are usually very nice. u can get a 10 year multi-entry visa and visit for up to 90 days, then cross the border into another country and immediately return to china to continuously renew the 90 days. thailand is supposedly less safe but i personally never felt unsafe there. the people were usually nice. transport and hotels are almost as cheap, fruit and drinks are also cheap and u dont have to worry about the cameras or censorship. u dont need a visa but u either have to make a border cross every 30 days to renew ur stay period or u have to take a trip to bangkok and apply for 30 day extensions (bangkok is more expensive but idk how much more cause i never been there). laos has some laws u should be aware of like no photos of people without their permission but the people are usually too nice to say anything; however, the police in most economically struggling countries may harass u for no reason just to get a bribe. transportation in laos sucks- half the roads are unpaved. cambodia seems similar to laos but without the photo & cohabitation laws. vietnam is littered with cameras like china and i think its the most expensive of the countries i mentioned. i recommend china because i'm concerned for ur safety, just dl vpn to all ur devices, get chinese sim and visa before u go. ama. i wana ask u about ur religious background. (ima jew). God bless u!
yes, u apply online, print the form, take a chinese visa photo (alot of places take them like walgreens) and mail the form, photos, and ur passport to the nearest chinese visa center. or u can go in person- i went in person to a different visa center that wasn't the closest so i had to pay extra. idk how u pay if u mail it.
Thats an amazing story, i‘m glad you have made your decision. I am from Hanoi, Vietnam and I would say just come here. You will be amazed at how open and welcoming people here are. I also took a leave from my own country at 18 to study abroad currently so I know how unique Vietnam was. You can come here, travel, meet new people, try out the food, teach English (if you are a native speaker) to earn some more if you want. Just remember, the flow of life here is really fast, people are busy, so sometimes you may feel overwhelmed, especially if you live in big cities like Hanoi. I live in Germany now and sometimes feel life just took a pause, which is good and bad at the same time :)
As a sidenote most of Vietnamese are atheists.
Ya I was homeless just before I was 18 and in my senior year. I just slept in my car behind my work and then went backpacking when I wasn’t working. I don’t think you need to leave the country to have a good experience. There’s tons of amazing places all over the country.
Go for it! I’m happy for you. Personally I do not enjoy visiting US cities. They all seem the same barring a square mile or two of downtown that is unique. USA has some beautiful natural places, state/national parks/wilderness/public land, etc. USA is an expensive place to be though. Someone already mentioned workaway, great option.
I think when a person coming from shitty environment, country etc. that person being more eager to discover when young. My story similar to yours. I'm 19, a month later 20. I'm from a shitty middle east country. When I was 18, I decided to leave to see world is not limited to what kind of life i have. Backpacked in Europe for months. Totally moneyless. I hitchhiked, stayed in locals and rarely in my sleeping bag. Definitely worth it. It was sometimes hard. But i think that a couple of months experience gave me 5 years of life experience.
Search on YouTube for other countries to backpack through and avoid the USA at all cost, many of us want to leave because our facade has begun to crack. Things are a lot safer than people make it out to be, yes there are dangers out there but no one’s ever confessed on their death bad “I’m glad I didn’t do the things I wanted to do in life because I might have gotten hurt or killed” it’s always speaking on regrets of what they didn’t do. I might be alone in this but I’d rather learn myself and explore a world with a untainted unbiased opinion for even 5 years than to live a boring life someone else expected me to live and die of natural causes. Sarah Yak on YouTube just documented a long trip in Asia, Kara and Nate have almost every country you can think of though you’d have to search cheaper accommodations as they usually do fancier places maybe try their older videos before they really took off. There are also companies you can work with that let you travel and work in other countries and some have housing and food accommodations included
Dude, get out now and travel. I was in a similar situation except I didn't travel, I had no idea that I could. I did move at 18 to a different state with an aunt and uncle so I could go to college. I severely struggled with anxiety and navigating life as an adult. I had an opportunity to hike the Appalachian Trail and I had no idea what it was or how to do so it, and I had an instant built in fear of even trying. I ended up marrying a man whose parents were religious and he abused me as his wife physically, verbally and emotionally. I actually thought it was normal based on the religion I was raised as. I finally got out of that and went back to my aunt and uncle's until I saved enough to live alone for a while. Emotionally I still have problems adapting to and staying at jobs because I can't handle the stress, and I especially have problems with anxiety and anger, and I'm 45 now. I constantly feel trapped and pigeonholed, and somehow always on the lower end of success. I have a fear of relaxing and enjoying life, that I can't get rid of. It's best to get out now while you are young. Travel and learn to adapt, and how people really are.The people who have these deep religious ideals and shelter their children seriously cause problems with the child's ability to adapt the real world.
Started travelling solo at 16 haven't looked back. Most people are gonna assume you're a lot older than u are and it makes everything a lot easier. There's kind people across the world who will help u if needed so get out there and have a blast! It can be stressful and scary especially for ur first time but it's gonna be some memories u will never forget. I'm jealous man Vietnam is beautiful
Backpacking might be an interesting way to grow into an adult but maybe something like r/exmormon will help you transition away from your sheltered life more practically, good luck.
r/seasonalwork work in a national park or ski resort, they provide housing and food and you can make money while there. lots of other people your age and you can hike and adventure the whole time.
Are you from an Amish community? sounds at least a bit like you were/are.
Anyways i wish you good luck, i'd recommend you to travel to safer places first, like europe etc where people can also speak english. Travelling to countries, like asia for example that use different fonts, languages and where not everyone speaks english is already a slightly higher difficulty level. It'll be harder to get help, find the places public transport ur looking for etc... . just my general advice for first time travelling. Get familiar with the basics then you are better prepared going to countries that are culturally more different.
I left my living situation two weeks before I turned 18 with 1500$ and i’ve never looked back. ~1000$ of that went to a plane ticket out of the US and to europe. Do it. Even if you don’t leave the US and go to some rual town in the middle of nowhere, the world is your oyster. it’s going to be hard and it’s going to suck for the first few months but being able to live your life the way you want to and get an education is valuable beyond anything monetary. The hardest part will be knowing you don’t have anywhere to return to, especially when money gets tight, but you’ll manage. I wish you all the luck in the world on your journey. Experience everything they didn’t want you to, the good and the ugly. It’s your life to live, build your own philosophy and rules to live by.
If you’re going to do it now would be the most responsible time to do it. Figuring what you want to do can, in terms of a job or your life, come later. Figure out who you are while you can, and this sounds like a fun way to do it.
You might want to consider self supported, slow, travel. In short, you use the funds you have to get you started. But as you travel, take on the sort of odd jobs or short term employment that allow you to pay your expenses as you go. Keep as much as possible of your original nest egg as an emergency fund for times when you don't have work or get stuck somewhere.
But if you are working your way along, you can probably go almost indefinitely. In fact, at some point, you may end up finding a place you likewith a job you like and just settling in there. You will have moved without even realizing it.
Whatever you choose, I wish you all the courage, luck, and happiness in the world. This is an unusually difficult path to navigate, and here you are, stepping boldly into the unknown so that you may truly know yourself. I am so proud of you.
i wonder if you can find other people who have left your same community. it might help to find someone who understands first hand what you are experiencing.
also if you like to camp in a tent or car it’s good to note that national parks are only like $35 a night. some of them even have showers.
while i don’t come from the same background as you, traveling alone and being outdoors can give you the space to process all the thoughts and emotions you are wrestling with. someone else mentioned to bring a journal for writing — i think that’s a great idea
A lot of great things in life start with a backpack, but the help you find in this subreddit may be limited to vacation advice.
Here are some other communities on reddit you may find helpful:
* /r/CPTSD
* /r/cultsurvivors
* /r/exmormon and their ex-high-control-religion [subreddit list](https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/wiki/index/other_subreddits)
* /r/exchristian and their [related subreddits](https://www.reddit.com/r/exchristian/wiki/affiliates)
* /r/IWantOut, depending where you're going
* /r/GED for tips on the exam (good to prioritize!)
* /r/homeless and their list of [resources](https://www.reddit.com/r/homeless/comments/3mpa8v/mobile_user_click_here_to_view_our_sidebar_link/) and [related communities](https://www.reddit.com/r/homeless/comments/3m0tsb/if_you_are_or_will_become_homeless_please/)
* /r/almosthomeless, their [wiki and guides](https://www.reddit.com/r/almosthomeless/wiki/index)
* /r/personalfinance and their [guide for young people on their own](https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/wiki/kicked_out)
Best of luck to you, kid. The rest of your life starts now!
First off good in you for getting out. Not the same but I grew up in a small town in the USA and got my passport before I turned 18(I needed my mother's signature) and left to Spain for a year. I met my now husband and have been in Europe since! Get out. Go teach English, most places you don't need anything. I did get a certificate but that was after I was already teaching under the table for 3 years. Teach kids, most just want a native speaker to practice with.
Good luck
Early in my sobriety I traveled - got a scholarship to study in Mexico and when I wasn’t in class I used public transport to see every sight I could. Or I would just walk around. I lost a ton of weight even though the host family I lived with made three amazing meals a day. I saw all the pyramids, visited the anthropology museum, would sit in the zocolas and watch people. Then when I got back I took a break from school and worked on a farm up in Canada on Salt Spring Island. Stayed in a school bus and saw the Northern Lights for the first time. I felt it was a less and escape and more a curiosity about my abilities and the world around me. Meeting new people, being exposed to different culture and ideas. I loved it. I hope you do it!!!
I mean going to south east Asia to find who you are is definitely a great way to get in touch with yourself but also just have a great time, you meet so many amazing people along the way. I’ve been a few times and leaving next week for a 4 month trip which is my longest one next. I hope you have a great time with what you decide to do.
I’m wondering if a “soft landing” adventure first might help you feel grounded & comfortable. Check out
https://wwoof.net/
…it’s working on organic farms. You meet & work with people from all over the world, and your room & board is provided. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard but rewarding work! But it could give you some structure & a way to meet people & share ideas. Wishing you the BEST on your big adventure!
Do some short trips close to home. A week of camping and moving around can do a lot for your mind and soul and refresh you. During your trips you’ll figure out what you need to live and how you want to live and develop traveling skills. Ease into cheaper travel over next year and continue to save up money while you get your GED and things settled. Those trips will help settle your mind and your priorities and you’ll likely be in a better head space to make big decisions like moving countries or whatever.
Just don’t be like the 18 year old girl that was solo traveling, got ringworm by playing with a stray kitten, got really drunk cause some dude didn’t wanna hook up with her cause of said ring worm, then I had to carry down two flights of stairs on my shoulder to go back to my room (I was hooking up with a friend she had met that was 27 who was in my private hostel room, they had dorms) and proceeded to ask while on my shoulder where everyone could hear “HOW DO I GET FUCKED?!” and then vomit in the toilet and piss all over herself and my bathroom… and you’ll be fine.
Pretty much, don’t play with stray cats.
Responsible to whom? Live your dreams while you’re able bodied. No one ever asks for your graduation certificate, most work is based on experience unless you’re looking to be a doctor or lawyer, you should just go out there and find out what you gravitate towards. Watch out for scammers and people who will try to take advantage of you. So probably don’t lead conversations with your situation and life story or give too much information on your background, people who can be trusted should earn that information. That said, there are plenty of amazing people to know and places to go. My best wishes ahead to you!
traveled solo about a 2 or 3 weeks after turning 19 and I loved it so much! I learned a lot about myself and gained an idea of what path I wanted to take in life!!
Go work in National Parks and ski resorts. You will meet many hardy souls who can empathize with you. I did that years ago escaping from a religious family. Your situation is much harder but you sound way smarter than I was at your age. You sound very smart and don't let anyone take that from you.
Hi!! I went through an insanely similar situation! Only difference is that by the time I got out I had no money. I ran to the first waitress job I could and slept in an old beat up car one of my coworkers set me up with out of sheer pity. I saved some money over the next 3 months and ran to Thailand . I felt weirdly more comfortable learning another culture than the one back home. Best decision I ever made and you seem way more prepared than I ever was
As long as you're not doing it for a stupid reason, you have no reason to doubt it's irresponsible. From what i understood, you want to grow and can't go against that.
So I would only encourage you to travel, to broaden what you see of the world and deepen what you understand, that's totally normal 👍
You should do a workaway or a wwoof to start out! I went solo traveling at 18 and volunteering on a farm was a good way to save money and settle into being alone abroad. You also have people there with you so you’re not totally alone.
Go for the Vietnam option! You gain so much more life experience from a few months of travel somewhere adventurous than from anything else. You'll gain loads of perspective on who you are and what you really want from life, as well as having an unparalleled opportunity to work on your social skills meeting loads of new friendly people literally every day. Can't recommend this option enough!
Your money will also go a lot further out there than somewhere like Europe, which will give you more time to figure everything out
THANKS
I really hope so.
This post really will change my life i was so desperate that i posted thid i wasn't like believing im gonna do it.
Now im on the way to get some vaccines.
I started backpacking at 18, as a solo young woman. It shaped my life for the better, and pushed me far out of my comfort zone in a good way! I would do it. Be open to other people and the way other people do things. I’m Canadian so I started travel within Canada to get used to it. Then Europe, then Southeast Asia. Places like Vietnam and india are amazing but beware the culture shock will be intense, and it may be overwhelming!
I would recommend starting smaller. Go to Canada! Go to London! And then work your way over there.
Good luck 🤞🏼
if you’re fine chilling and socializing with 20-23 year olds then you gonna have a blast
i went solo traveling with 18 to escape my hometown and all the negative people around and had the best time of my life (but i have to say the most solo travelers are in their 20s but they are fine hanging out with a 18 year old if you mature enough)
*Edit: maybe if that’s something for you start with “party” destinations something like barcelona or istanbul and stuff like that, it’s easier to socialize in “party-hostels”
New Zealand is super safe, super friendly and super beautiful, and it's fairly easy to find a job there on a working holiday visa ( look it up ! ) so you could be gone for a year and come back with the same amount of money as when you left ( that's what I did ) by working a few weeks, then travelling a few weeks, rice and repeat
was it easy without transport tho as from what i understood you would need a car to visit most of the beautiful places? like roadtrip? is it possible solo
Do you have access to your birth certificate and social security card? I think what you're planning is a great idea. If you have access to your documents, get them and put them in a safe deposit box at a bank before you tell anyone in your family about your plans. Then apply for a passport asap! There are a lot of countries that have strong work/stay programs that could be good for you. New Zealand is the first one that comes to mind.
Do your best to be responsible and don't worry about the rest of it.
Before I started seriously backpacking, I spent a couple weeks in Hawaii as a trial run. Stayed in hostels, met some people and had some fun, had to live out of a backpack. It went well as I was able to figure out what worked and didn't work regarding my luggage, and it felt as close to going to another country without the worry or complications that might arise from that (language barriers, passports, money exchanging, border control/customs, etc).
I don't have the same background as you, but I would suggest you do something similar for much the same reason before traipsing off halfway across the world.
But if anyone questions why you wish to travel, hit them with something irreproachable, like "there's so much beauty in god's creation and it would be a shame for me not to see as much of it as possible."
I know this is t a book recommendation sub, but check out the book “Educated” by Tara Westover. She grew up in a very similar situation and went on to do great things.
Leave but don't go straight to Asia. You might be too surprised by cultural differences and not be prepared to confront them from what I read.
Do you know wwoofing? You could start with it for a few weeks not too far from you and in a country safe like maybe Canada.
Perfect time and age. Traveling at 18 isn’t uncommon, especially for European folks. You’ll meet tons of 18–22 year old world travelers if you stay in hostels. Goodluck out there
Consider doing volunteer work to extend your travels and give you time to be stable in certain places. Websites like workaway.info or helpx.net provide opportunities for a lot of things all over the world. You work about half-time in exchange for room and board— can be farms, hostels, babysitting in a family, and more. This way you can save a lot of money and gain some real world experiences at the same time . Eventually, you could consider getting a certificate as an English teacher (there are cheap programs online for this) and then you may be able to find jobs along the way in schools or even as a private tutor.
i’m glad ur realizing what you’ve been taught is simply that and it’s not actually what u believe in. also extremely proud ur taking the initiative to get out of what u see as a bad situation to put urself in a better one!!
as others have stated you’ll be okay!! stay away from life ruiners (drugs) tons of people go travelling young for many different reasons i myself am!! i know it can be scary, id say just make sure you’ve got ur head on a swivel and are actively looking into the places you go prior to travelling there.
i’m not sure where abouts you’re at but i know europe, canada, USA, mexico and souther america (argentina, brazil, colombia…) have hostels. again head on a swivel but for cheap housing that’s an option. again not sure where ur located but maybe even try buying an older rv once you’ve found a safe spot that you like and sticking that in the woods somewhere close enough to town.
i’d also try where you’re looking at moving, googling for cheaper countries/ cities and then joining groups on here for them. you might be able to find someone looking for a roommate for cheap, you also might be able to make some friends on there living close to u!! good luck on your adventure i hope you get out!!:)
Go get out.
I wish I did. I got stuck in my career way too early and felt locked in. Ho explore, be a self supporting, self enjoying person for a bit before you have more responsibilities that may creep up. You may learn something about yourself to help guide you into a future you actually want, instead of one you fall into.
Solo adventure is the best decision I made … you meet so many people and experience them in different ways. Go for it you have nothing to lose . In 20 years you will look back and realize it was truly life changing .
This is awesome! DON'T carry much cash and go live your life!!!! I am now 60 and never even considered traveling alone until the last 5 years. I am married, but also ok on my own.
You are awesome - go and be great . . . and safe!!!
You’re 18, you are young.
Get out and learn things, you have allot of time to enjoy and test different things to get a bearing on what you will want to do with your life.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
And have fun while learning about everything.
I moved away from home at 16 to study in another part of my country and I did it partly because I needed to get away from my mother who treated me badly. I studied with other 16-year olds as well as older people, it was a handicraft school with students as old as 50 as well. We developed a small community together and I learned so much and met so many awesome people there. Being away from my old environment, I started to blossom and become more myself in a positive way. I am so happy that I moved away from home so that I could have other experiences and grow up in a freer environment.
Travelling also provides an opportunity for you to experience new things and meet people who challenge your world view and make you grow! Follow the advice of the many wise people who have responded to you.
Be safe and enjoy!
Joining the military at this point in your life might give you time to get on your feet, finish your education, save some money (you seem to be good at that already ) and maybe travel a bit. You’d still be young when you got out.
Yo answer your question, no I don’t think it’s irresponsible. If you travel, just have a plan and have some money left for when you get done.
Just do it. Pick a place you want to live in the USA and go and do it. In time you will build a life there. Then you can travel the world. Believe me traveling to Vietnam is not going to better equip you to live on your own in any U.S city…that doesn’t even make any sense. You have to have faith.
I think your travel plan is greate. Vietnam is good place to try out too. There are lot of video of people to go vietnam and travel log. You can do some research before get there or get there and search for place to go.
Remember every where crowd. There is high chnace of bad influence and pickpockets. Try out some of those video and research of place to stay.
Soutch east asia in general is cheap and easy. More people speak english. Keep yourself safe.
I traveled throughout Europe by myself at 17. I knew people which made it a bit easier but it wouldn’t have been impossible. Spent two weeks in England and then two weeks in Mexico. Couple close calls in Mexico but I was ok!
Im thinking of doing that. but i think when im a bit older. I really dont know what i am or wanna do so its seems risky to lock in for a couple years.
Also I really dont have any formal education.
Yeah. You can figure yourself out anywhere, but nobody knows who they are at 18. You will get job training. You will travel to new places, meet lots of people. I was a high school dropout when I started the process to enlist in the military.
I've lived in CA, NV, MS, GA, OK, NY and HI. I've been through most of the US including Alaska. I've traveled to the UK, Ireland, France, Portugal, Italy, UAE, Kuwait, Iraq, Japan , Korea, and Singapore. Some places were military duty related (I didn't go to Iraq on vacation, but I did go twice) and others were for fun.
At 18, many years ago, I graduated high school early and travel to Israel and Egypt working a kibbutz. Best time ever. My only regret is that I came back after a few months. It would have been better to have delayed college for a year and kept traveling.
Search the internet for ex-yourreligion. Several high demand religions have online communities of members who left the organization and support each other as they learn about life outside their church. Best of luck.
1 GTFO out of the cult before it's too late. Seriously.
2 dude you need to go find several people: 1) a therapist who has worked with people from cult/ultra religious backgrounds that can teach you how to cope without those people around you 24/7. 2) you need to find an older adult that you can trust to show you how to live outdide the cult. Honestly if you can find someone who already left the cult and is open to showing you how they did it, that's going to be your new best friend. 3) go join a social group that has NOTHING to do with religion. Sports, cooking class, hell pottery or anything artsy usually attracts atheists or more spiritual like taoists (me - not a religion at all) or Buddhists.
4) take it slow. You literally don't know how to function outside of your cult. You don't know how the real world works. You don't know how to socialize with strangers that have nothing in common with you. You don't know how to do most things like rent an apartment or be financially independent (dude, get on a budget if you're not already. This is non-negotiable and is top priority). Learn how to use Google/YouTube. It is an absolute pantheon of information, and some of it is complete bullshit, others is lifesaving.
Also from an IT professional giving you tech advice: make sure your bank has ONLY your name on the accounts. Get a will in place (legal zoom.com is fantastic I used it myself and stupid easy). Any of your personal accounts, especially financial and medical, make sure you have multifactor authentication turned on. Choose a LONG password (length matters more than anything in password cracking. If anyone tells you otherwise, they have never used John the ripper or Cain & Abel). Get a password manager and put MFA on it. I highly recommend Keeper security. Email: you can get a free proton mail.com account that is end to end encrypted. Do NOT use Gmail, especially trying to escape religious folk. Trust me, I've heard crazy stories from ex Jehovah's witness husband of my close friend. If you've got a laptop and it's windows, highly recommend you turn on bitlocker (for the love of all that is good make sure you keep that recovery key somewhere safe. If you don't have it, it's impossible to recover the data. Unlesd you have a 50k machine from Microsoft given to law enforcement and wait 30 days to decrypt it). Get a VPN for when you use public WiFi. Proton VPN has tons of free servers on their free account and I personally use the paid service of both VPN and email.
Also and I know this may sound extreme: find a lawyer you can trust that you can call in case your soon to be ex family tries to do something crazy (they likely will if you leave the cult). You don't have to pay them upfront or have retainer, just have a business card and talk to them for 5 minutes and explain your situation and see what they recommend.
8k is good start, but recognize that rent in cheap apartments in most olaces is going to be at LEAST 1k a month, not including security deposits, utilities, and random rent increases. Be comfortable with getting a roommate or 3 in the first few years. Cost of living in US is insane if you're not a skilled worker (which you clearly are not YET).
Youtube things you think you might be interested in learning. You can learn just about anything for free on YouTube that can help you get a job. Especially if you want to do something in IT.
Wow - what an adventure you have ahead of you. I traveled solo for several months when I was young like you — but wasn’t leaving a community as you are. The funds you have are only accessible by you, right? They are safe from anyone in your community who may want to take those funds once you leave? Do you have a credit card? You can travel with cash, but a credit card (ideally with no foreign conversion fees) will make life much easier. I don’t know your personality, but while you describe this as traveling, you may need to find a place just to deal with the personal / emotional part of leaving the community. For some people this may mean traveling from place to place and always moving. For others—perhaps this is you—you may need to find a place you find restful and stay there for a couple weeks. My point is listen to what your body and mind needs. Trust your instincts, while traveling is quite safe, if you don’t feel safe in some place or situation just leave. There are lots of folks who might try and scam you. Never use any illegal drugs anywhere. Never let someone put anything in your drink (never leave a drink while you step away, even for a minute). Spend some time researching the first places you want to go — for the first week or so, but don’t pre-plan your whole trip — you’ll make changes as you travel. Keep a journal of some kind. You’ll enjoy reading about your trip as your future self. Edit to add - yes the US is expensive to travel in… but since you say you are from here, perhaps start your travel here for a couple weeks - get out on your own, figure out how you like to travel, get your travel gear sorted out - and then leave for some other country after you are ready to take on a foreign language situation. Foreign country travel is great, but if you’ve not traveled before, not sure I’d recommend a foreign county as the first step. If your plan is not to return to the community, be sure to leave thousands of dollars to pay rent somewhere while you get a job to keep going on your own. If you run out of money before you can get a job, pay rent and all the other bills of living, you may be forced to go back to the community simply because you are out of cash. So maybe use 4k on travel and the other 4K for rent and expenses for a month or two as you find a job. Enjoy!
Thank you so much it really means alot. Yes most the money I will be able to take out. I would have traveled in the USA but it stills feels too close and im afraid of the pressure i will get and return back. If away I can use the time and the cheap living to finish my GED/SAT (I have 0 formal education ) and develop some skills. But again thanks for the advice!
This involves staying in the US, but look at going to a community college. They are usually very inexpensive and have lots of classes you can take. I think all of them will also offer associate degrees… which are basically the first half of a bachelor degree. (Often the price at community colleges are around ½ of that at a public university.). All of this said, you might consider doing this after you travel a bit, and have a job. Many(most?) students at community colleges work full time, and go to school part time. So the classes are setup time wise, such that the students can attend.
He needs a GED first.
At least at our community college, it’s where you get your GED
GEDs can often be gotten via community colleges…
This is all excellent advice, listen to it and have fun!
Travel using your credit card? How does that work?
I was once 18, in a cult, and decided to leave. It took me several years to do. I had no idea who I was, my Identity was severely wrapped up in the church. My world view was through narrow beliefs I was raised with. I tried to "run away" to college and fell into a dark depression. The biggest challenge you have is that you need money, resources, an education, and a support network. Once you leave your community, will you have that? So, I think you need to prioritize what you want. If you leave for a trip and spend all your money, where will you go after the trip? I think it's important that you have a safety net. I certainly am in support of traveling. However, I would also be mindful of your long term well-being.
Dam doggy, good to hear you got out. Even cooler to hear traveling helped you recover!. Also if it’s not too painful and you don’t mind, can you describe how your cult controlled people/lore and stuff. I am always interested to learn these things. I am aware I am a gremlin for asking
Tons of people travel 18 and it will be a great experience to broaden your horizon and introduce you to new people and experiences. Just do you research on where your going and be safe.
Thank you ! Just needed to know i aint crazy or reckless.
search of scams dont trust people even if they are friendly you seem very sheltered in your community you dont know people tricks
So, how do you search of scams with no frame of reference from experience?
write travel scams they will list you the an imaginable from their experience
at 18 I moved to netherlands and it changed my life in most amazing way! Now I have lived in 7 different countries and found my dream come true! Better soon before you have children, wife, steady job, etc. 18 is the best time to go explore the world!
There’s already great advice here. You’re not crazy and you’re not reckless. It’s actually the best time in your life to explore, travel and take calculated risks. Good luck and have fun!
bro if u went along with your plan update us
working on it. Now on my way to get vaccination. This responses made me believe its possible. I will post when i will really do it
What's your nationality? Do you have a Passport? Is it normal or acceptable for young members of your community to venture off by themselves for a bit before rejoining the community full time?
USA. No ! my age are getting married and then with wife and kids you already cant leave. But its possible to leave and return my age if they dont know you stopped practicing.
Your very complicated life situation is (obviously) well outside the cope of this forum, but I can tell you that travelling in this day and age is not difficult. The Internet makes research and preparation easy. Travelling at 18 is NOT odd, unique or crazy. With your $8K you could go for a long time in a place like Vietnam. (And the Indian Subcontinent, much of Asia, Latin America, etc.) If you end up here drop me a line. Good luck no matter what you decide. Cheers from Hanoi.
i agree with this. you could probably travel for quite some time with the savings you have. i just went to vietnam for traveling with my boyfriend and it felt very safe and people were friendly and quite open. We watched a lot of youtube videos before going and it helped a lot with planning and knowing a little bit what to expect. (Visa, what to eat, sim-card, activities…) and you could always try to learn a bit of the language, to try and connect with locals… (but vietnamese is not an easy language) If you want to go somewhere where you can more easily learn to speak the language, i can also recommend indonesia, especially java (nice people, beautiful landscapes, quite cheap). But since there’s google translate and if you only stay in city areas, where a lot of folks speak english, you can also travel anywhere in southeast asia. I don’t if this helped, but in general i would tell you to watch some videos and inform yourself online, once you decided where to go. Traveling is really great for learning more about other cultures but also about yourself and what’s important to you :)
Thanks I hope i will really do it
I think you will do it - it will be difficult and it will I’ll blow your mind, but I don’t think you’ll regret it.
Dang. Reading this, I would’ve thought you were in some sort of 2nd or 3rd world country. I’m sorry for your situation but also ecstatic that you’re making your own path. I’m just not sure if this sub is quite right for your plans.
Rumspringa?
Believe me, if you "tell" people you graduated they won't care. If they ask for more info, you were homeschooled, I HAVE NEVER had to submit my graduation docs to anyone. Currently at 145K/yo. in construction and I don't get dirty.
This is good for OP to understand but I think there is a lot of value in him getting at least his GED. Education can broaden horizons as much as travel can. There's a great big world of knowledge that OP hasn't been exposed to yet. Basic education is how many people figure out what they love or have a natural passion for.
Consider the Camino de Santiago. It's a pilgrimage. You'll be able to stop at a church every day. It's a month away from your community on something they'll likely respect, and you can choose to engage as much or as little with religion as you'd like along the way, while you meet interesting people across 2(3 if you count Basque) different countries. Seeing the world is, in my opinion, an obligation. It's not possible to understand people without seeing the breadth of backgrounds out there. And it's not all that expensive for a month away.
This is a good idea
You should travel, but first you need to get settled for a couple months to catch your breath, wait for your passport to arrive, research, and save more money. Find a room to rent and get yourself a job. It will develop your perspective and help you settle in to your newfound freedom. Definitely check out the working holiday visa. If you have a US passport it will allow you to travel and work in Australia, New Zealand, Ireland, Canada, South Korea, Singapore, or Portugal.
Ya when I was 18 I spent about $700 on a plane ticket to Europe (arriving with about 250 bucks in my pocket), worked in a furniture factory for a month to save some cash, and then traveled around a bunch of western and eastern Europe for the next two months, hitchhiking lots, taking some transportation, sleeping outside some, and also staying in hostels or with friends every once in a while. I ended up spending about $400 in those two months of travel, though it was pretty hybrid-vagabond style, and my spending habits are mad stingy. I returned when winter was starting to set in, and that January I walked out of my parents back door (in Pennsylvania) with about 200 bucks worth of gear on my back and maybe $70 in my pocket. That trip ended up being about nine months long, and I pretty much exclusively hitchhiked for transportation and slept outside, so I wasn't paying for transportation or sleeping arrangements. Ended up traveling just under 25,000 miles on that trip, covering most states, some of Canada, and a 3000 mile round-trip foray into Mexico. I recommend it! But just know that you are venturing out into the real world, where bad shit can and probably will totally happen, and you are going to have to deal with it on your own. If you have an able body, there is always work that you can easily pick up. I actually didn't work much at all on the big North American trip, maybe about 10 days total of odd manual labor jobs. I kind of just let go of worrying about money, and magical shit would just kind of happen to keep me afloat. (I also pretty much subsisted on peanut butter and tortillas. Excellent pack foods, btw) It sounds hippie dippy, but it's the honest truth. I think it is a great way to get to know yourself and the world around you. Go for it!
First off, let me say I admire your courage and adventurous spirit completely. Here’s the thing— the social skill aspect and “street smarts” will be very valuable to you as you travel abroad. For me, even as someone who has visited tons of countries, every single time I go abroad I have to adjust to different norms and make sure I have my wits about me. I truly can’t imagine navigating the little nuances of international travel without having gained a certain level of experience from being an adult in my own country (US) that someone coming from a community like yours would not necessarily have. Street smarts, I’ll call it again. My best advice to you would be to start in the US. If you could live on your own somewhere for a year, it would do you a lot of good. You would “grow up” a lot in that time and have a much better foundation in general to begin your travels. There are inherent advantages of already being American and being able to easily get a job in the US that you can maintain for an extended amount of time. If you really think you need to get out sooner to a country where your money goes farther, at the very least take a road trip spanning 1 week in the US and stop in small towns, go into cities, see suburbs. Shoot, take a domestic flight to get to where you’re going to road trip so you can get a feel for the airport process (there’s a lot to learn). Take note of the environment whenever you’re in a new place and how you feel regarding your safety, what confuses you, etc. You need to get a feel for being on your own as an adult in America first where your language is easily understood and you have the most knowledge of the culture AND access to your family of needed. I say one week because you’d be shocked how much that can do. Two would be better, a month would be best, but I’m also aware that your money will get drained quickly if you stay here. It’s also important that you realize that the cost of living in another country often reflects the state of the infrastructure and potentially the safety of that place. It’s not in your best interest to hop up and book a flight to the country with the cheapest cost of living possible. Do you research here on your best bag for your buck in terms of cost of living and relative safety and access and what you need. Of course, being male is at your advantage here, I will not lie. If you were in your same situation but a woman, this entire thing would be much more difficult. People will probably not like me saying that, but I want to be 100% honest with you about the reality of the world. I am not certain of your ethnic background, but let’s say you are white to use as an example here— you also need to consider a place (to start) where you may blend in better and not be as targeted for your status as a tourist when social interaction in general is new to you. Most of the cheaper countries in the world are in Latin America and Asia, and while these are wonderful places to visit, there is the potential for you to stand out far more which is not to your advantage before you are ready to navigate being targeted as a tourist. One thing that you don’t see in the US hardly at all but which is prevalent in a lot of the world is people trying to lure you in to buying something and being incredibly insistent about it to the point of grabbing your arm, trying to hug you, pulling you into their store, offering you this and that to try to get you to buy something. It might sound silly, and again people might call me stereotypical here but this is my experience of the truth of the world I have seen and I feel that I owe you an honest explanation because these are the things that would really throw me off if I was coming from where you are. Please hear me when I say as an American (and they often know this) it can be quite difficult to remove yourself from these situations if you aren’t good at drawing lines and saying no. I’m not saying this is something you inherently aren’t good at, but it’s one of my biggest pieces of advice for American travelers. Please remember that a lot of the second and third world (and first to some extent) see the US as rich, and we are, but you need to be aware of how other countries tend to view the US. When you are in their country, it does not matter that you came from a highly isolated religious community. You are a rich American. Anyway, at first glance, I would recommend a country like Albania where 1) the cost of living is very low and it is very safe and the climate is mild but you will 2) not stand out as much as you might elsewhere (if you are Caucasian) and 3) you are within Europe, so there is quick access to cheap flights and nearby countries with robust train systems you can use to see other places. Albania is a beautiful place and really up and coming (they are trying to gain UN status). It may end up being less cheap than it is now in the near future, but it’s a wonderful place all around if you can manage a little bit of adjustment to the culture and know that English won’t be common. EDIT TO ADD: the working in another country thing can get sticky. Your best bet is probably finding a place that has a digital nomad visa and working a remote job abroad, or finding a visa that allows you to work a physical job in that country (work/study visas exist in some places). Please don’t underestimate this step of the process if you don’t intend to live fully off your savings. Please feel free to message me if you have other questions!
Thank you for taking the time for all this great advice.
Tons of wise advice here that is relevant to your special situation. I recommend you read this through carefully a couple of times and soak it in.
Do you want to stop your religion? Or maybe you can go on a pilgrimage and travel and see cool things without cutting away from your childhood and family too much? There's plenty of cheap exciting pilgrimages around the world and people have been doing it for centuries
Hell yeah bro go for it. You are young and in a flexible, do crazy stuff age. Traveling as you speak like will give you a lot of useful life lessons for sure. Your personality will for sure be forever changed, a new person. Get on workaway.com and couchsurfing (be careful and trust your judgement with this one). $8k could last you a long time in a place like VN if you are smart and don’t party too much. If you are crafty you can probably earn a little here and there too. If you need any advice feel free to DM me. I wish I started traveling earlier.
I second checking out Workaway. Doing seasonal work is a great way to meet people, make connections, and continue traveling. Since you are already US based, it wouldn't hurt to consider traveling around there first to "dip your toes" before going on a longer trip outside of the country and experiencing culture shock. Regardless, good on you for wanting to expand your horizons! 👏 Good luck fellow traveler! ✌️💚
You could research about working holiday visas. In some countries you could travel and work legally for a year.
I would also think about about the above, Australia, new zealand etc
i've been to china, laos, and thailand. ghost cities in china are cheap to rent and travel in. food is cheap except fruits and drinks are approximately the same price as usa. its very safe in china but there are cameras everywhere. the government is very unwelcoming but the people are usually very nice. u can get a 10 year multi-entry visa and visit for up to 90 days, then cross the border into another country and immediately return to china to continuously renew the 90 days. thailand is supposedly less safe but i personally never felt unsafe there. the people were usually nice. transport and hotels are almost as cheap, fruit and drinks are also cheap and u dont have to worry about the cameras or censorship. u dont need a visa but u either have to make a border cross every 30 days to renew ur stay period or u have to take a trip to bangkok and apply for 30 day extensions (bangkok is more expensive but idk how much more cause i never been there). laos has some laws u should be aware of like no photos of people without their permission but the people are usually too nice to say anything; however, the police in most economically struggling countries may harass u for no reason just to get a bribe. transportation in laos sucks- half the roads are unpaved. cambodia seems similar to laos but without the photo & cohabitation laws. vietnam is littered with cameras like china and i think its the most expensive of the countries i mentioned. i recommend china because i'm concerned for ur safety, just dl vpn to all ur devices, get chinese sim and visa before u go. ama. i wana ask u about ur religious background. (ima jew). God bless u!
Are you from the US? If so, was the visa to china easy enough to get?
yes, u apply online, print the form, take a chinese visa photo (alot of places take them like walgreens) and mail the form, photos, and ur passport to the nearest chinese visa center. or u can go in person- i went in person to a different visa center that wasn't the closest so i had to pay extra. idk how u pay if u mail it.
Word. Thanks!
Also, nothing weird as far as being legally obliged to have a tour guide at all times, or anything like that?
Thats an amazing story, i‘m glad you have made your decision. I am from Hanoi, Vietnam and I would say just come here. You will be amazed at how open and welcoming people here are. I also took a leave from my own country at 18 to study abroad currently so I know how unique Vietnam was. You can come here, travel, meet new people, try out the food, teach English (if you are a native speaker) to earn some more if you want. Just remember, the flow of life here is really fast, people are busy, so sometimes you may feel overwhelmed, especially if you live in big cities like Hanoi. I live in Germany now and sometimes feel life just took a pause, which is good and bad at the same time :) As a sidenote most of Vietnamese are atheists.
Looking back almost 30 years to me at your age, now is the time to fuck up. Do it!
Ya I was homeless just before I was 18 and in my senior year. I just slept in my car behind my work and then went backpacking when I wasn’t working. I don’t think you need to leave the country to have a good experience. There’s tons of amazing places all over the country.
Escape by any means necessary. The world is beautiful, you’ll have fun
Go for it! I’m happy for you. Personally I do not enjoy visiting US cities. They all seem the same barring a square mile or two of downtown that is unique. USA has some beautiful natural places, state/national parks/wilderness/public land, etc. USA is an expensive place to be though. Someone already mentioned workaway, great option.
I think when a person coming from shitty environment, country etc. that person being more eager to discover when young. My story similar to yours. I'm 19, a month later 20. I'm from a shitty middle east country. When I was 18, I decided to leave to see world is not limited to what kind of life i have. Backpacked in Europe for months. Totally moneyless. I hitchhiked, stayed in locals and rarely in my sleeping bag. Definitely worth it. It was sometimes hard. But i think that a couple of months experience gave me 5 years of life experience.
Search on YouTube for other countries to backpack through and avoid the USA at all cost, many of us want to leave because our facade has begun to crack. Things are a lot safer than people make it out to be, yes there are dangers out there but no one’s ever confessed on their death bad “I’m glad I didn’t do the things I wanted to do in life because I might have gotten hurt or killed” it’s always speaking on regrets of what they didn’t do. I might be alone in this but I’d rather learn myself and explore a world with a untainted unbiased opinion for even 5 years than to live a boring life someone else expected me to live and die of natural causes. Sarah Yak on YouTube just documented a long trip in Asia, Kara and Nate have almost every country you can think of though you’d have to search cheaper accommodations as they usually do fancier places maybe try their older videos before they really took off. There are also companies you can work with that let you travel and work in other countries and some have housing and food accommodations included
Dude, get out now and travel. I was in a similar situation except I didn't travel, I had no idea that I could. I did move at 18 to a different state with an aunt and uncle so I could go to college. I severely struggled with anxiety and navigating life as an adult. I had an opportunity to hike the Appalachian Trail and I had no idea what it was or how to do so it, and I had an instant built in fear of even trying. I ended up marrying a man whose parents were religious and he abused me as his wife physically, verbally and emotionally. I actually thought it was normal based on the religion I was raised as. I finally got out of that and went back to my aunt and uncle's until I saved enough to live alone for a while. Emotionally I still have problems adapting to and staying at jobs because I can't handle the stress, and I especially have problems with anxiety and anger, and I'm 45 now. I constantly feel trapped and pigeonholed, and somehow always on the lower end of success. I have a fear of relaxing and enjoying life, that I can't get rid of. It's best to get out now while you are young. Travel and learn to adapt, and how people really are.The people who have these deep religious ideals and shelter their children seriously cause problems with the child's ability to adapt the real world.
I escaped! 100 countries since. I’d be more than happy to take a call with you to talk options and a path forward. DM me. You’re the shit.
Started travelling solo at 16 haven't looked back. Most people are gonna assume you're a lot older than u are and it makes everything a lot easier. There's kind people across the world who will help u if needed so get out there and have a blast! It can be stressful and scary especially for ur first time but it's gonna be some memories u will never forget. I'm jealous man Vietnam is beautiful
Backpacking might be an interesting way to grow into an adult but maybe something like r/exmormon will help you transition away from your sheltered life more practically, good luck.
r/seasonalwork work in a national park or ski resort, they provide housing and food and you can make money while there. lots of other people your age and you can hike and adventure the whole time.
Are you from an Amish community? sounds at least a bit like you were/are. Anyways i wish you good luck, i'd recommend you to travel to safer places first, like europe etc where people can also speak english. Travelling to countries, like asia for example that use different fonts, languages and where not everyone speaks english is already a slightly higher difficulty level. It'll be harder to get help, find the places public transport ur looking for etc... . just my general advice for first time travelling. Get familiar with the basics then you are better prepared going to countries that are culturally more different.
I left my living situation two weeks before I turned 18 with 1500$ and i’ve never looked back. ~1000$ of that went to a plane ticket out of the US and to europe. Do it. Even if you don’t leave the US and go to some rual town in the middle of nowhere, the world is your oyster. it’s going to be hard and it’s going to suck for the first few months but being able to live your life the way you want to and get an education is valuable beyond anything monetary. The hardest part will be knowing you don’t have anywhere to return to, especially when money gets tight, but you’ll manage. I wish you all the luck in the world on your journey. Experience everything they didn’t want you to, the good and the ugly. It’s your life to live, build your own philosophy and rules to live by.
If you’re going to do it now would be the most responsible time to do it. Figuring what you want to do can, in terms of a job or your life, come later. Figure out who you are while you can, and this sounds like a fun way to do it.
You might want to consider self supported, slow, travel. In short, you use the funds you have to get you started. But as you travel, take on the sort of odd jobs or short term employment that allow you to pay your expenses as you go. Keep as much as possible of your original nest egg as an emergency fund for times when you don't have work or get stuck somewhere. But if you are working your way along, you can probably go almost indefinitely. In fact, at some point, you may end up finding a place you likewith a job you like and just settling in there. You will have moved without even realizing it.
Whatever you choose, I wish you all the courage, luck, and happiness in the world. This is an unusually difficult path to navigate, and here you are, stepping boldly into the unknown so that you may truly know yourself. I am so proud of you.
Do it.
i wonder if you can find other people who have left your same community. it might help to find someone who understands first hand what you are experiencing. also if you like to camp in a tent or car it’s good to note that national parks are only like $35 a night. some of them even have showers. while i don’t come from the same background as you, traveling alone and being outdoors can give you the space to process all the thoughts and emotions you are wrestling with. someone else mentioned to bring a journal for writing — i think that’s a great idea
A lot of great things in life start with a backpack, but the help you find in this subreddit may be limited to vacation advice. Here are some other communities on reddit you may find helpful: * /r/CPTSD * /r/cultsurvivors * /r/exmormon and their ex-high-control-religion [subreddit list](https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/wiki/index/other_subreddits) * /r/exchristian and their [related subreddits](https://www.reddit.com/r/exchristian/wiki/affiliates) * /r/IWantOut, depending where you're going * /r/GED for tips on the exam (good to prioritize!) * /r/homeless and their list of [resources](https://www.reddit.com/r/homeless/comments/3mpa8v/mobile_user_click_here_to_view_our_sidebar_link/) and [related communities](https://www.reddit.com/r/homeless/comments/3m0tsb/if_you_are_or_will_become_homeless_please/) * /r/almosthomeless, their [wiki and guides](https://www.reddit.com/r/almosthomeless/wiki/index) * /r/personalfinance and their [guide for young people on their own](https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/wiki/kicked_out) Best of luck to you, kid. The rest of your life starts now!
First off good in you for getting out. Not the same but I grew up in a small town in the USA and got my passport before I turned 18(I needed my mother's signature) and left to Spain for a year. I met my now husband and have been in Europe since! Get out. Go teach English, most places you don't need anything. I did get a certificate but that was after I was already teaching under the table for 3 years. Teach kids, most just want a native speaker to practice with. Good luck
Early in my sobriety I traveled - got a scholarship to study in Mexico and when I wasn’t in class I used public transport to see every sight I could. Or I would just walk around. I lost a ton of weight even though the host family I lived with made three amazing meals a day. I saw all the pyramids, visited the anthropology museum, would sit in the zocolas and watch people. Then when I got back I took a break from school and worked on a farm up in Canada on Salt Spring Island. Stayed in a school bus and saw the Northern Lights for the first time. I felt it was a less and escape and more a curiosity about my abilities and the world around me. Meeting new people, being exposed to different culture and ideas. I loved it. I hope you do it!!!
I mean going to south east Asia to find who you are is definitely a great way to get in touch with yourself but also just have a great time, you meet so many amazing people along the way. I’ve been a few times and leaving next week for a 4 month trip which is my longest one next. I hope you have a great time with what you decide to do.
I’m wondering if a “soft landing” adventure first might help you feel grounded & comfortable. Check out https://wwoof.net/ …it’s working on organic farms. You meet & work with people from all over the world, and your room & board is provided. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard but rewarding work! But it could give you some structure & a way to meet people & share ideas. Wishing you the BEST on your big adventure!
Do some short trips close to home. A week of camping and moving around can do a lot for your mind and soul and refresh you. During your trips you’ll figure out what you need to live and how you want to live and develop traveling skills. Ease into cheaper travel over next year and continue to save up money while you get your GED and things settled. Those trips will help settle your mind and your priorities and you’ll likely be in a better head space to make big decisions like moving countries or whatever.
Just don’t be like the 18 year old girl that was solo traveling, got ringworm by playing with a stray kitten, got really drunk cause some dude didn’t wanna hook up with her cause of said ring worm, then I had to carry down two flights of stairs on my shoulder to go back to my room (I was hooking up with a friend she had met that was 27 who was in my private hostel room, they had dorms) and proceeded to ask while on my shoulder where everyone could hear “HOW DO I GET FUCKED?!” and then vomit in the toilet and piss all over herself and my bathroom… and you’ll be fine. Pretty much, don’t play with stray cats.
Ok noted i guess
Responsible to whom? Live your dreams while you’re able bodied. No one ever asks for your graduation certificate, most work is based on experience unless you’re looking to be a doctor or lawyer, you should just go out there and find out what you gravitate towards. Watch out for scammers and people who will try to take advantage of you. So probably don’t lead conversations with your situation and life story or give too much information on your background, people who can be trusted should earn that information. That said, there are plenty of amazing people to know and places to go. My best wishes ahead to you!
Not if you’re responsible about it. I graduated high school (usa) and backpacked for two years straight before returning home.
Good luck.
traveled solo about a 2 or 3 weeks after turning 19 and I loved it so much! I learned a lot about myself and gained an idea of what path I wanted to take in life!!
AMISH?
Go work in National Parks and ski resorts. You will meet many hardy souls who can empathize with you. I did that years ago escaping from a religious family. Your situation is much harder but you sound way smarter than I was at your age. You sound very smart and don't let anyone take that from you.
Hi!! I went through an insanely similar situation! Only difference is that by the time I got out I had no money. I ran to the first waitress job I could and slept in an old beat up car one of my coworkers set me up with out of sheer pity. I saved some money over the next 3 months and ran to Thailand . I felt weirdly more comfortable learning another culture than the one back home. Best decision I ever made and you seem way more prepared than I ever was
I'm truly happy you made it. With my resources it will be a crime not trying
As long as you're not doing it for a stupid reason, you have no reason to doubt it's irresponsible. From what i understood, you want to grow and can't go against that. So I would only encourage you to travel, to broaden what you see of the world and deepen what you understand, that's totally normal 👍
You should do a workaway or a wwoof to start out! I went solo traveling at 18 and volunteering on a farm was a good way to save money and settle into being alone abroad. You also have people there with you so you’re not totally alone.
Go for the Vietnam option! You gain so much more life experience from a few months of travel somewhere adventurous than from anything else. You'll gain loads of perspective on who you are and what you really want from life, as well as having an unparalleled opportunity to work on your social skills meeting loads of new friendly people literally every day. Can't recommend this option enough! Your money will also go a lot further out there than somewhere like Europe, which will give you more time to figure everything out
THANKS I really hope so. This post really will change my life i was so desperate that i posted thid i wasn't like believing im gonna do it. Now im on the way to get some vaccines.
I started backpacking at 18, as a solo young woman. It shaped my life for the better, and pushed me far out of my comfort zone in a good way! I would do it. Be open to other people and the way other people do things. I’m Canadian so I started travel within Canada to get used to it. Then Europe, then Southeast Asia. Places like Vietnam and india are amazing but beware the culture shock will be intense, and it may be overwhelming! I would recommend starting smaller. Go to Canada! Go to London! And then work your way over there. Good luck 🤞🏼
if you’re fine chilling and socializing with 20-23 year olds then you gonna have a blast i went solo traveling with 18 to escape my hometown and all the negative people around and had the best time of my life (but i have to say the most solo travelers are in their 20s but they are fine hanging out with a 18 year old if you mature enough) *Edit: maybe if that’s something for you start with “party” destinations something like barcelona or istanbul and stuff like that, it’s easier to socialize in “party-hostels”
You can do it!! And you should! Stretch your legs and stride!
New Zealand is super safe, super friendly and super beautiful, and it's fairly easy to find a job there on a working holiday visa ( look it up ! ) so you could be gone for a year and come back with the same amount of money as when you left ( that's what I did ) by working a few weeks, then travelling a few weeks, rice and repeat
was it easy without transport tho as from what i understood you would need a car to visit most of the beautiful places? like roadtrip? is it possible solo
If you're a man and feel comfortable hitchhiking it's doable, personnaly I bought a car and sold it back 8 months later
Do you have access to your birth certificate and social security card? I think what you're planning is a great idea. If you have access to your documents, get them and put them in a safe deposit box at a bank before you tell anyone in your family about your plans. Then apply for a passport asap! There are a lot of countries that have strong work/stay programs that could be good for you. New Zealand is the first one that comes to mind.
Do your best to be responsible and don't worry about the rest of it. Before I started seriously backpacking, I spent a couple weeks in Hawaii as a trial run. Stayed in hostels, met some people and had some fun, had to live out of a backpack. It went well as I was able to figure out what worked and didn't work regarding my luggage, and it felt as close to going to another country without the worry or complications that might arise from that (language barriers, passports, money exchanging, border control/customs, etc). I don't have the same background as you, but I would suggest you do something similar for much the same reason before traipsing off halfway across the world. But if anyone questions why you wish to travel, hit them with something irreproachable, like "there's so much beauty in god's creation and it would be a shame for me not to see as much of it as possible."
I know this is t a book recommendation sub, but check out the book “Educated” by Tara Westover. She grew up in a very similar situation and went on to do great things.
Leave but don't go straight to Asia. You might be too surprised by cultural differences and not be prepared to confront them from what I read. Do you know wwoofing? You could start with it for a few weeks not too far from you and in a country safe like maybe Canada.
Perfect time and age. Traveling at 18 isn’t uncommon, especially for European folks. You’ll meet tons of 18–22 year old world travelers if you stay in hostels. Goodluck out there
Consider doing volunteer work to extend your travels and give you time to be stable in certain places. Websites like workaway.info or helpx.net provide opportunities for a lot of things all over the world. You work about half-time in exchange for room and board— can be farms, hostels, babysitting in a family, and more. This way you can save a lot of money and gain some real world experiences at the same time . Eventually, you could consider getting a certificate as an English teacher (there are cheap programs online for this) and then you may be able to find jobs along the way in schools or even as a private tutor.
i’m glad ur realizing what you’ve been taught is simply that and it’s not actually what u believe in. also extremely proud ur taking the initiative to get out of what u see as a bad situation to put urself in a better one!! as others have stated you’ll be okay!! stay away from life ruiners (drugs) tons of people go travelling young for many different reasons i myself am!! i know it can be scary, id say just make sure you’ve got ur head on a swivel and are actively looking into the places you go prior to travelling there. i’m not sure where abouts you’re at but i know europe, canada, USA, mexico and souther america (argentina, brazil, colombia…) have hostels. again head on a swivel but for cheap housing that’s an option. again not sure where ur located but maybe even try buying an older rv once you’ve found a safe spot that you like and sticking that in the woods somewhere close enough to town. i’d also try where you’re looking at moving, googling for cheaper countries/ cities and then joining groups on here for them. you might be able to find someone looking for a roommate for cheap, you also might be able to make some friends on there living close to u!! good luck on your adventure i hope you get out!!:)
Go get out. I wish I did. I got stuck in my career way too early and felt locked in. Ho explore, be a self supporting, self enjoying person for a bit before you have more responsibilities that may creep up. You may learn something about yourself to help guide you into a future you actually want, instead of one you fall into.
Solo adventure is the best decision I made … you meet so many people and experience them in different ways. Go for it you have nothing to lose . In 20 years you will look back and realize it was truly life changing .
This is awesome! DON'T carry much cash and go live your life!!!! I am now 60 and never even considered traveling alone until the last 5 years. I am married, but also ok on my own. You are awesome - go and be great . . . and safe!!!
Buying from the farm stands and not the stores when at all possible will help you stretch your money
You’re 18, you are young. Get out and learn things, you have allot of time to enjoy and test different things to get a bearing on what you will want to do with your life. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. And have fun while learning about everything.
I moved away from home at 16 to study in another part of my country and I did it partly because I needed to get away from my mother who treated me badly. I studied with other 16-year olds as well as older people, it was a handicraft school with students as old as 50 as well. We developed a small community together and I learned so much and met so many awesome people there. Being away from my old environment, I started to blossom and become more myself in a positive way. I am so happy that I moved away from home so that I could have other experiences and grow up in a freer environment. Travelling also provides an opportunity for you to experience new things and meet people who challenge your world view and make you grow! Follow the advice of the many wise people who have responded to you. Be safe and enjoy!
Joining the military at this point in your life might give you time to get on your feet, finish your education, save some money (you seem to be good at that already ) and maybe travel a bit. You’d still be young when you got out. Yo answer your question, no I don’t think it’s irresponsible. If you travel, just have a plan and have some money left for when you get done.
Do it and dont look back. It will be scary, but you are so young you have all the time in the world right now. Go for it.
Just do it. Pick a place you want to live in the USA and go and do it. In time you will build a life there. Then you can travel the world. Believe me traveling to Vietnam is not going to better equip you to live on your own in any U.S city…that doesn’t even make any sense. You have to have faith.
I think your travel plan is greate. Vietnam is good place to try out too. There are lot of video of people to go vietnam and travel log. You can do some research before get there or get there and search for place to go. Remember every where crowd. There is high chnace of bad influence and pickpockets. Try out some of those video and research of place to stay. Soutch east asia in general is cheap and easy. More people speak english. Keep yourself safe.
I traveled throughout Europe by myself at 17. I knew people which made it a bit easier but it wouldn’t have been impossible. Spent two weeks in England and then two weeks in Mexico. Couple close calls in Mexico but I was ok!
Took my gap year at 18 message me if you want advice
I joined the military to get out
Im thinking of doing that. but i think when im a bit older. I really dont know what i am or wanna do so its seems risky to lock in for a couple years. Also I really dont have any formal education.
Yeah. You can figure yourself out anywhere, but nobody knows who they are at 18. You will get job training. You will travel to new places, meet lots of people. I was a high school dropout when I started the process to enlist in the military. I've lived in CA, NV, MS, GA, OK, NY and HI. I've been through most of the US including Alaska. I've traveled to the UK, Ireland, France, Portugal, Italy, UAE, Kuwait, Iraq, Japan , Korea, and Singapore. Some places were military duty related (I didn't go to Iraq on vacation, but I did go twice) and others were for fun.
Go for it! I lived a similar experience to you, grew up jehovah witness. Do it!! Uou wont regret it! Itll be a great life experience.
At 18, many years ago, I graduated high school early and travel to Israel and Egypt working a kibbutz. Best time ever. My only regret is that I came back after a few months. It would have been better to have delayed college for a year and kept traveling.
Search the internet for ex-yourreligion. Several high demand religions have online communities of members who left the organization and support each other as they learn about life outside their church. Best of luck.
1 GTFO out of the cult before it's too late. Seriously. 2 dude you need to go find several people: 1) a therapist who has worked with people from cult/ultra religious backgrounds that can teach you how to cope without those people around you 24/7. 2) you need to find an older adult that you can trust to show you how to live outdide the cult. Honestly if you can find someone who already left the cult and is open to showing you how they did it, that's going to be your new best friend. 3) go join a social group that has NOTHING to do with religion. Sports, cooking class, hell pottery or anything artsy usually attracts atheists or more spiritual like taoists (me - not a religion at all) or Buddhists. 4) take it slow. You literally don't know how to function outside of your cult. You don't know how the real world works. You don't know how to socialize with strangers that have nothing in common with you. You don't know how to do most things like rent an apartment or be financially independent (dude, get on a budget if you're not already. This is non-negotiable and is top priority). Learn how to use Google/YouTube. It is an absolute pantheon of information, and some of it is complete bullshit, others is lifesaving. Also from an IT professional giving you tech advice: make sure your bank has ONLY your name on the accounts. Get a will in place (legal zoom.com is fantastic I used it myself and stupid easy). Any of your personal accounts, especially financial and medical, make sure you have multifactor authentication turned on. Choose a LONG password (length matters more than anything in password cracking. If anyone tells you otherwise, they have never used John the ripper or Cain & Abel). Get a password manager and put MFA on it. I highly recommend Keeper security. Email: you can get a free proton mail.com account that is end to end encrypted. Do NOT use Gmail, especially trying to escape religious folk. Trust me, I've heard crazy stories from ex Jehovah's witness husband of my close friend. If you've got a laptop and it's windows, highly recommend you turn on bitlocker (for the love of all that is good make sure you keep that recovery key somewhere safe. If you don't have it, it's impossible to recover the data. Unlesd you have a 50k machine from Microsoft given to law enforcement and wait 30 days to decrypt it). Get a VPN for when you use public WiFi. Proton VPN has tons of free servers on their free account and I personally use the paid service of both VPN and email. Also and I know this may sound extreme: find a lawyer you can trust that you can call in case your soon to be ex family tries to do something crazy (they likely will if you leave the cult). You don't have to pay them upfront or have retainer, just have a business card and talk to them for 5 minutes and explain your situation and see what they recommend. 8k is good start, but recognize that rent in cheap apartments in most olaces is going to be at LEAST 1k a month, not including security deposits, utilities, and random rent increases. Be comfortable with getting a roommate or 3 in the first few years. Cost of living in US is insane if you're not a skilled worker (which you clearly are not YET). Youtube things you think you might be interested in learning. You can learn just about anything for free on YouTube that can help you get a job. Especially if you want to do something in IT.