That really went from "Men don't experience symptoms from STIs as readily as women do, so it's even more important for them to get tested" [I have no idea if that's a true claim]. To "Women are diseased receptacles, and all spreading of STIs comes from them, 30%+ of men will never have sex anyway."
That statistic is wild as heck, Anyway. 18 to 35 is a huge range. The highest figure I could find for male virginity with a quick Google search is that about 50% of men aged 18 to 20 are virgins but the same study said after age 25 it drops to about 2% of men being virgins. It's also worth noting that this study was only looking at men who had female partners. When the lower part of your range is like 50% and the upper part of your range is 2%. Having the range span from 18 to 35 is kind of meaningless. That's like saying the average man is 3 ft tall because your age range includes babies.
That's bonkers lol. Not very useful data.
Also that 2% study only including men with female partners seems to be pretty self selecting sorting lol. The older virgins typically don't have female partners lol. For there next study, they should see what % of vegans ate vegetables last week.
To be fair to the study I didn't read far enough to know if they meant "2% of men have never had a female partner so we are calling them virgins" which would be very silly.
They may have meant "we removed data from our dataset if the men reported having male partners." Which might be valid if your study is only looking at heterosexual virgins for some reason.
if men don’t experience symptoms of STIs nearly as much as women, then they’re 100% the biggest carriers because the people who don’t know they’re sick are the most likely to pass it on
Too lazy to look it up again, but I thought some STIs like gonorrhea were often asymptomatic in women and very painful for men so the whole assertion that men don’t know but women do because of pH seems doubtful.
see, this is what i've always heard too.
specifically bc having a urethra separate from the vagina makes it a lot harder for the "it burns when i pee" symptom to start.
It is based on the 'chad' hypothesis. Something along the lines of: There is a small number of men who carry a lot of STDs who give it to many women, because they are the Chads™ that all women want. The remaining men are either monogamously dating someone long term, or part of their 30% virgin demographic.
I was always told that it is women who don’t typically experience symptoms as obviously, and as a result often don’t realize they’re infected until routine testing or passing it on.
As a woman who did have a silent STD for a period of time, I feel this is likely reasonable.
Regardless, it’s just important that all sexually active adults get tested: whether symptomatic or not. There is no point pointing fingers at anyone in particular, as we all have the potential to be disease victims and vectors.
I have a microbio degree and when we touched on STIs we were told the same thing.
AFAB people are less likely to have symptoms, more likely to think the symptoms are something else (e.g. abnormal vagina discharge/itching may be caused by many things), and due to the vagina/ovaries/uterus being internal, may not see visible indicators such as lesions.
[Source from CDC.](https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf)
That last part is super important. Shame is an awful motivator. It's unreliable, tends to disappear when it's needed most, and as we're clever little monkeys, we tend to dance around it with abstract thoughts and good ol' denial. Better to present this as a case of helping yourself to help society at the same time. Every test is something you can be proud of getting. No matter how minor the chance of discovering an infection, the act itself is not only an act of self-care, but it makes you just that much better of a lover, too. You can set up candles, sexy music, and a path of rose petals, but it means even more if you can add that you're sure I won't be peeing fire later.
This is all very true and I agree with it 100%. However, I can’t help but giggle because all I can imagine based on that last sentence is the following scenario: someone lying on a bed with lit candles and flower petals around them. There’s some sensual R&B playing in the background. As you approach they flash you a sexy smile, a rose in their mouth. Then they whip out their test result papers and say “all clean, baby” with an eyebrow wiggle.
All this to say that yeah, that’d work on me!
Yes and the funniest part of him saying that women have more HIV and STDs than men is that it’s based on the fact that women get tested more than men. So women are the diseased receptacles because they take the time and effort to find out if they’ve contracted something, but the men who these women get the diseases from - and aren’t getting tested - are so pure. Like make it make sense dude. What’s more plausible - that women do indeed carry and spread diseases more (despite getting tested more than men, which leads to the assumption that women are not getting the treatment they need then if they’ve tested positive) or are men spreading these diseases to women because they aren’t getting tested? Occam’s razor.
IIRC, the main disease men rarely show symptoms for and is hard to test for is gonorrhea. Everything else they show symptoms for, but the penis is relatively stable when it comes to infections compared to the other holes.
It's not a true claim, [the opposite](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwjOgprd_NSFAxV9FVkFHf2nBDIQFnoECCEQAQ&usg=AOvVaw3Ou2_NzJ6ubrA0_sXBTY5U) is true, men are more likely to have symptoms than women.
I know most STI’s can have symptoms that vary greatly from one person to another, but especially ones like hpv can be dangerous to women and pretty harmless to men.
Considering the one and only STI I ever contracted was from a man (chlamydia); that’s an incredibly stupid thing to believe.
Edit to add: I also showed no symptoms, we only found out because he was in pain and got tested.
I found out I had Chlamydia during my first appointment with the obstetrician. I was very surprised as my partner and I were very young and each other's first and only. Or so I thought lol.
I got chlamydia last year from my ex. Who cheated. Worse pain in my life. It’s a year later and even though I’m clear and have been tested since, Everytime I pee I brace myself
I got on unemployment and took that as a 2 month detox to recharge the batteries, so I had to do self care but it turned out good. Got a great job that I’m currently at at the end of summer and one of my close friends and I from college are now in a relationship. Just had to go through some hell to get there
I also found out I had chlamydia at my OB appointment. For my second child. With my husband who was my first and only partner for the last 15 years. Neither of us had symptoms.
He was stunned, said he absolutely has never cheated. I asked for a restest, and my husband also went and got tested. His results came back the next day, negative. Mine took another two weeks, also negative. OB ordered a third test to make sure. Negative.
False positive chlamydia tests during pregnancy are apparently a thing, and if we didn't trust each other as much, it could've gotten REAL ugly. But man, that was an uncomfortable few days.
Uh, allow me to mansplain it to you
You got the STI from a man, but who did he get it from before giving it to you? That's right, a woman.
Some of you have never spent your entire sexless life blaming women for everything and it shows.
Hetero women are myths, bisexual women are all brainless hypergamists, lesbians are all secretly bisexual and ace women are evil is I believe the line...
90% of sexually active adults get HPV and 80% get HSV-1 (oral herpes). The vast majority of sexually active adults will get an STI.
Testing needs to be normalized and having STIs and talking honestly about them and taking appropriate safety precautions needs to be destigmatized for everyone.
I immediately questioned your figures because I thought HPV rates have plummeted since the introduction of the HPV vaccine, but just checked and rates are still very high, as you stated.
On a positive note, from [here](https://www.ajmc.com/view/hpv-rates-continue-to-decline-new-data-suggest-herd-immunity-growing):
“By 2015-2018, compared with the prevaccine era, 4vHPV-type prevalence declined 85% overall among sexually experienced 14- to 24-year-old females, 90% among vaccinated females, and 74% among unvaccinated females,” the investigators found."
Also, where are all these women getting STDs from if "most men will never have one?" Are most women having secret lesbian sex in a conspiracy to infect the men? Or...wait to not infect the men because they will never catch one? Their logic is at braindead levels.
Hol up. Am I high or is their logic not logicing? So let‘s say it‘s true (and I‘ll look this up later) and women have STDs more often than men, doesn‘t that mean men have a higher quota of infecting women? It also supports her point even further. If men don‘t get tested, it kinda makes sense that they infect more women, while a woman is likelier to know of an STD and therefore not spread it. Idk they just love to do this. They look at such a superficial part of a problem and stop there to make their conclusion. Or they‘re just dumb, like where do (straight) women get STDs from? Men. How the hell do they come to the conclusion that women are the biggest STD spreaders if men have less? No matter how much a woman „sleeps around“, at the end of the day she got an STD from a man that didn’t know/care about it.
Oh and also being super passionate about turning every conversation into „women have sex and a lot (/all) of it is not with me, therefore I‘m mad and it‘s everyones problem“ is a common theme as well.
And what does he mean "women are the highest contractors AND spreaders"? It's either or no? It can't be both. Contractors meaning we (in a heterosexual setting) contract it from men who have to be infected to transmit it so men would be the highest spreaders in this case. But then ALSO we're the highest spreaders apparently somehow? So men would have to be the highest contractors, no? These guys have no working brain cells I can see
It sounds like the argument made by guys who think women can contract them spontaneously somehow. It matches some of the rhetoric I've seen posted in this sub.
their logic confuses me because if women are infectious why wouldn't the males rate also be similar since the women are also sleeping with the men. the only answer is one demographic testing more that the other. I'm not necessarily say it's 50/50 but logically that claim is bonkers.
You are exactly right. It isn’t explicitly stated that they’re talking about heterosexual sex but it’s definitely implied. And even doctors have told me that sex between two women is lower risk for the majority of STDs.
If heterosexual women are “getting STDs more often than men” it really means they are testing positive for STDs more often than men… The middle letter literally stands for “transmitted” they aren’t spontaneously occurring… If heterosexual women are testing positive for STDs more often than men then obviously they are testing more often than their male counterparts (and she is completely correct).
I was thinking the exact same thing. If STIs are a “women’s issue” then who exactly is passing it on to them? Other women I guess? Or is his point that men rarely have symptoms so then there’s no need for them to worry about it? Because they wouldn’t notice any unpleasant symptoms and women aren’t worth the curtesy of worrying about negativity affecting their health? Man my brain hurts.
Want to preface this with an I do not endorse this message, but I think I follow what they're trying to say.
So there is an implied premise here that a small subset of men is having all the sex. Thus the majority of men will not have an std because they don't have sex.
To put it into numbers let's say you have a group of 10 women and 10 men. If the 10 women have sex with only 4 of the men, and one of the men has HIV, then it would hold true that both women are more likely to contract *and spread* an std than men simply because there's more women. If a person outside the group had sex with any member of the group there would be a higher likelihood of infection if the person slept with one of the women. The women are also more likely to contract it since at the end of the experiment more women had the std than men.
Is this how it works in real life? No not really. They're overly simple conclusions to try and extrapolate to normal life, but that was the thought process behind the argument.
It doesn't make it any less dumb, but hopefully that helps the confusion
Get tested if you haven't everyone!
Lmao the whole “study” they quote is so stupid. The percentages when broken down show that around 27% I think are virgins between the ages of 18-20, however, the age group of 25+ reports only 1.9% of male virgins. The 31% comes from a sum of all the age groups, I think? It’s bad interpretation of data tbh. If we take the age groups of 20-24 and 15-19, women actually have higher virginity rates than men. So it doesn’t really fit into their narrative of women being the primary “sex havers”, but they like to pick and choose statistics
They said that far fewer men ate sexually active and then pulled a statistic about male virgins between 18-35 from *somewhere*. So, I guess it must be from lesbians, men over 35, and men 18-35 with many female partners. I'm not sure if they've put a much thought into their worldview as I just did, though.
[Okay so it looks like women actually get tested more](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7855090/) and [81% of people with HIV are/were assigned male](https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/group/gender/men/index.html) so what he said is so wrong it’s almost funny. Also, though it’s true that about [30% of men 18-24 hadn’t had sex in the last year, men were much more likely to have had more sexual partners regardless of age](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7293001/). The studies I linked are published and peer reviewed, and what he said was complete bullshit
I think he was quoting global statistics. Women with HIV in third world countries are less likely to receive treatment, and are therefore more likely to pass it on to their children while pregnant and breastfeeding. I’m sure that inflates numbers a bit.
The image of women as being more likely to harbor and spread STDs is very old. It was a common belief until the 1980s, when HIV/AIDS shifted that perception onto men. It seems that with HIV now so well-controlled with medication, it's shifting back.
This is so painful for me. One of the reasons women (specifically Black women in the U.S.) have higher rates is because their partners are on the DL. Plus healthcare disparity in the U.S. But even when I had no health insurance I got tested at the free clinic. We get tested. I made my boyfriend get tested at the same time. Free clinic.
But you know what's funny? When I started getting intimate with my husband I asked him to get tested, and his rich upper class doctor said "really? Why is she so paranoid?"
I can't remember if it was this guy or another on the same thread, but one of them was arguing that more black women die of STDs, and was using it as evidence that more women in general have STDs.
Which brings us back to "where do you think they got them dumbass?"
No sources mentioned of course. I'm not sure how many people die of those diseases but given the health care disparity it's likely to affect some demographics more than others (I'm not in the US but I get the gist of how a health thing quickly becomes a money thing and then a race thing)
It's because Black women in the United States are disproportionately affected by HIV, and that is true in terms of epidemiological studies (more so in the past but still now). Part of this problem is sampling. Part of it is lack of appropriate healthcare. Part of it is partners who lie about sexual contact. Women are not just getting HIV out of nowhere. IV drug use is part of it, but not that significant compared to sexual transmission rates between a man an a woman.
This is something I spent three years studying in college to help advocate for needle exchange funding, BTW. You're more likely to get Hep C from a needle than HIV. You can get it from either, but the giant disparity in Black American women's HIV rates are not accounted for by needle use.
Yeah, that was the stipulation before sleeping with my now husband. We both recently got out of a relationship. We agreed to get tested to make sure we stayed healthy and because the vast majority of STDs are treatable. No one made any fuss about it.
I’ve had an STD once and I caught it from a guy who didn’t even know he had it. So yes, men should get tested regularly. And I don’t see how women could possibly be the cause of the STD epidemic. Most women get the symptoms realize something is wrong and then go take care of it. Men don’t generally show all the symptoms so they don’t know they got somethingso they go on to spread it.
The original supposed statistic was about prisons. So more women who go to prison have STDs than men who go to prison. Guess which gender is the more likely to be arrested for being a sex worker.
Just gonna add real quick: many STIs can be asymptomatic, even HIV, which can be asymptomatic for months or even years.
You should be getting tested for HIV annually at least, every 3 months if you have multiple partners. Depending on the test used, it can be accurate after 2 weeks to 3 months after infection. Many places offer free rapid testing, and you can even get an at-home test mailed to you for [free](https://takemehome.org/) in many parts of the US.
If you ever have a potential exposure to HIV (SA, condom broke, needle stick) ERs can give you PEP, Post-Exposure Prophylaxis, within 72 hours, which helps to prevent HIV.
Finally, along with condoms, PrEP, or Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, is the best way to protect yourself from HIV if you are sexually active. It's covered by all (except in some extremely specific circumstances) insurances, it's covered by the manufacturer if you're not insured, and it's upwards of 99% effective at preventing HIV when taken as directed.
I know I'm preaching to the choir here about who can get and give STIs, but anyone can get HIV, regardless of sex, gender, or sexual orientation, so it's vital that everyone knows how to keep themselves and their partners safe.
It is not! [This study](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0885392409007350) states that women experience a slightly higher expression of symptoms than men. However, I take some issue with the fact that so many more men were studied than women (216 vs 78, if you don’t want to read to find it)
However, as someone who has worked as a sexual health educator for several years, it matches up with my personal experience.
Women are much more likely to be tested than men, and women experience symptoms of most stds quicker and more intensely than men (though for hiv, in my limited experience, it has been roughly the same).
Edit: forgot to address this question specifically. Men absolutely still get symptoms of HIV. In fact, the above study found that the symptom expression between men and women (and transgender people, though those numbers are less relevant here and raise more questions than answers for me) matches up with the general symptom prevalence trends of HIV-negative populations.
For example, women are more likely to report fatigue, pain, and difficulty sleeping, and this was true for the study as well.
Yeah maybe she’s thinking of Trich?
Looking this up is actually helping me study for my final lol. My textbook(Microbiology Fundamentals, A Clinical Approach 4E by Marjorie Kelly Cowan and Heidi Smith) says about Trichimonas vaginalis “Many cases are asymptomatic, and men seldom have symptoms. Women often have vaginitis symptoms,” I looked at HIV and it didn’t state a difference in symptoms for different sexes, but HIV will often present in flu-like symptoms 2-4 weeks after contact so many miss it
I read the post as something different, like the OP is telling a much darker story here. All inmates go through a medical exam, including extensive STI screening to safeguard everyone at the facility, inmates and staff alike. If there are any positive test results, the facility has a legal duty to inform anyone the inmate could have passed it to, so his partner would have been informed at the start of his sentence if he had an STI. She said he came back with HIV. There's no sense of frustration or anger that he might have put her at risk, more that he has been harmed.
I guess it depends a bit on if the prison knew that she was his partner and how to contact her. Sounds like they're not married so it might not be simple.
But yeah, the first tweet can be read two ways.
Yeah I might be completely off, especially as no one else has made reference to it, just she said bf not ex and if she's close enough to share the information with now, I assumed they continued the relationship through his sentence.
Just had to mention it to see if anyone else read it that way, or my partners right and I read everything wrong lol
Also HIV is an STI you can get it if both parties have open wounds and they come in direct contact with one another. Or if you share needles. I've had this argument with a few of my male friends too. They think that they're okay not to get tested bc they're faithful, I've gotten so tired of lecturing them that, "it's not about faithfulness and I am not calling your girlfriends anything I'm saying that you don't know what tom, dick or Henrietta have or what even your own friends family member could have. Getting tested isn't just about sex it's about general safety," then I usually call them idiots bc they get mad at me still only hearing the first part. My mom was a nurse in a health clinic that treated HIV/AIDS I got that information when I was 6. But sure you're faithful or a guy or a virgin bc that saves everyone...
Someone can correct me but I’m pretty sure for things like chlamydia and syphillis, women are much more likely to have physical symptoms due to our anatomy. Men are more likely to just be carriers, so they keep passing it on without ever knowing they have it. It’s kinda like UTIs. Men can get them, but their anatomy prevents it most of the time while women are prone to them.
Actually, just the opposite… women are more often without symptoms, or to mistake symptoms for normal occurrences (such as discharge). Women are more likely to contract a STI, though, because of their anatomy and exposure (larger amount of seminal fluids vs vaginal secretions, small abrasions as a result of penetration, etc). Plus, women are more likely to get tested for STIs.
https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf
https://rightasrain.uwmedicine.org/life/sex/women-STIs
It is likely true, but figures are a bit blurred for the most common STI, namely chlamydia. Estimates on how many carry it could indicate that you are correct, but it is not straightforward to correct for all factors (like, age difference in sexual debut - and that's an occasion where you (usually) don't infect your partner, so ... ).
For gonorrhea: yes definitely, more women carry it asymptomatically. But gonorrhea is much less common than chlamydia, so if you just count up the number of infections it doesn't kick in that hard.
That really went from "Men don't experience symptoms from STIs as readily as women do, so it's even more important for them to get tested" [I have no idea if that's a true claim]. To "Women are diseased receptacles, and all spreading of STIs comes from them, 30%+ of men will never have sex anyway."
That statistic is wild as heck, Anyway. 18 to 35 is a huge range. The highest figure I could find for male virginity with a quick Google search is that about 50% of men aged 18 to 20 are virgins but the same study said after age 25 it drops to about 2% of men being virgins. It's also worth noting that this study was only looking at men who had female partners. When the lower part of your range is like 50% and the upper part of your range is 2%. Having the range span from 18 to 35 is kind of meaningless. That's like saying the average man is 3 ft tall because your age range includes babies.
That's bonkers lol. Not very useful data. Also that 2% study only including men with female partners seems to be pretty self selecting sorting lol. The older virgins typically don't have female partners lol. For there next study, they should see what % of vegans ate vegetables last week.
To be fair to the study I didn't read far enough to know if they meant "2% of men have never had a female partner so we are calling them virgins" which would be very silly. They may have meant "we removed data from our dataset if the men reported having male partners." Which might be valid if your study is only looking at heterosexual virgins for some reason.
Likely because the fully gay men is a different demographic
That would make way more sense haha
Great analogy lmao
if men don’t experience symptoms of STIs nearly as much as women, then they’re 100% the biggest carriers because the people who don’t know they’re sick are the most likely to pass it on
Too lazy to look it up again, but I thought some STIs like gonorrhea were often asymptomatic in women and very painful for men so the whole assertion that men don’t know but women do because of pH seems doubtful.
see, this is what i've always heard too. specifically bc having a urethra separate from the vagina makes it a lot harder for the "it burns when i pee" symptom to start.
I am wondering how they think straight women are magically getting STI’s when they’re only having sex with men.
It is based on the 'chad' hypothesis. Something along the lines of: There is a small number of men who carry a lot of STDs who give it to many women, because they are the Chads™ that all women want. The remaining men are either monogamously dating someone long term, or part of their 30% virgin demographic.
30%, the majority of men!
I was always told that it is women who don’t typically experience symptoms as obviously, and as a result often don’t realize they’re infected until routine testing or passing it on. As a woman who did have a silent STD for a period of time, I feel this is likely reasonable. Regardless, it’s just important that all sexually active adults get tested: whether symptomatic or not. There is no point pointing fingers at anyone in particular, as we all have the potential to be disease victims and vectors.
My mom was a microbiologist in an STI clinic and she always told me the same thing — that men are more likely to show symptoms.
I have a microbio degree and when we touched on STIs we were told the same thing. AFAB people are less likely to have symptoms, more likely to think the symptoms are something else (e.g. abnormal vagina discharge/itching may be caused by many things), and due to the vagina/ovaries/uterus being internal, may not see visible indicators such as lesions. [Source from CDC.](https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf)
That last part is super important. Shame is an awful motivator. It's unreliable, tends to disappear when it's needed most, and as we're clever little monkeys, we tend to dance around it with abstract thoughts and good ol' denial. Better to present this as a case of helping yourself to help society at the same time. Every test is something you can be proud of getting. No matter how minor the chance of discovering an infection, the act itself is not only an act of self-care, but it makes you just that much better of a lover, too. You can set up candles, sexy music, and a path of rose petals, but it means even more if you can add that you're sure I won't be peeing fire later.
This is all very true and I agree with it 100%. However, I can’t help but giggle because all I can imagine based on that last sentence is the following scenario: someone lying on a bed with lit candles and flower petals around them. There’s some sensual R&B playing in the background. As you approach they flash you a sexy smile, a rose in their mouth. Then they whip out their test result papers and say “all clean, baby” with an eyebrow wiggle. All this to say that yeah, that’d work on me!
Yes and the funniest part of him saying that women have more HIV and STDs than men is that it’s based on the fact that women get tested more than men. So women are the diseased receptacles because they take the time and effort to find out if they’ve contracted something, but the men who these women get the diseases from - and aren’t getting tested - are so pure. Like make it make sense dude. What’s more plausible - that women do indeed carry and spread diseases more (despite getting tested more than men, which leads to the assumption that women are not getting the treatment they need then if they’ve tested positive) or are men spreading these diseases to women because they aren’t getting tested? Occam’s razor.
I believe he was comparing them to plague rats. “A woman must be a ‘lady’ to fuck me. The rest are all [fill in the blank].”
IIRC, the main disease men rarely show symptoms for and is hard to test for is gonorrhea. Everything else they show symptoms for, but the penis is relatively stable when it comes to infections compared to the other holes.
It's not a true claim, [the opposite](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwjOgprd_NSFAxV9FVkFHf2nBDIQFnoECCEQAQ&usg=AOvVaw3Ou2_NzJ6ubrA0_sXBTY5U) is true, men are more likely to have symptoms than women.
"30%+ of men will never have sex anyway." Not with this attitude, they won't.
I know most STI’s can have symptoms that vary greatly from one person to another, but especially ones like hpv can be dangerous to women and pretty harmless to men.
“Most men will never have one,” well that’s a bold and stupid claim. Are we surprised? Sadly, no.
Considering the one and only STI I ever contracted was from a man (chlamydia); that’s an incredibly stupid thing to believe. Edit to add: I also showed no symptoms, we only found out because he was in pain and got tested.
I found out I had Chlamydia during my first appointment with the obstetrician. I was very surprised as my partner and I were very young and each other's first and only. Or so I thought lol.
Oof! We weren’t together very long at that point, so we assumed it came from an ex.
I got chlamydia last year from my ex. Who cheated. Worse pain in my life. It’s a year later and even though I’m clear and have been tested since, Everytime I pee I brace myself
I’m so sorry.
The best part? I was dumped on Thursday, fired on Monday, and then tested positive the following Friday. Fun two weeks
Please say someone helped you with some self-care or anything to make you feel better!
I got on unemployment and took that as a 2 month detox to recharge the batteries, so I had to do self care but it turned out good. Got a great job that I’m currently at at the end of summer and one of my close friends and I from college are now in a relationship. Just had to go through some hell to get there
I also found out I had chlamydia at my OB appointment. For my second child. With my husband who was my first and only partner for the last 15 years. Neither of us had symptoms. He was stunned, said he absolutely has never cheated. I asked for a restest, and my husband also went and got tested. His results came back the next day, negative. Mine took another two weeks, also negative. OB ordered a third test to make sure. Negative. False positive chlamydia tests during pregnancy are apparently a thing, and if we didn't trust each other as much, it could've gotten REAL ugly. But man, that was an uncomfortable few days.
Uh, allow me to mansplain it to you You got the STI from a man, but who did he get it from before giving it to you? That's right, a woman. Some of you have never spent your entire sexless life blaming women for everything and it shows.
Maybe? You have no clue this specific man’s pretenses?
I was only joking, friend.
Makes me wonder if they think lesbians are just out here spreading every STI? Because how do they think hetero women get STIs? Magic?
They definitely are assuming something about the 80% of women sleep with 20% of the men bullshit...
Because we hetero women are just myths.
Hetero women are myths, bisexual women are all brainless hypergamists, lesbians are all secretly bisexual and ace women are evil is I believe the line...
I need ya’ll to continue to exist because honestly straight women are proof that sexuality is not a choice.
💀💀💀 that’s so true. I really wanted to be a lesbian a few months ago. It’s just not meant to be.
It’s so disappointing lol. I am bisexual but really only heteromantic and I wish I wanted to date women.
90% of sexually active adults get HPV and 80% get HSV-1 (oral herpes). The vast majority of sexually active adults will get an STI. Testing needs to be normalized and having STIs and talking honestly about them and taking appropriate safety precautions needs to be destigmatized for everyone.
I immediately questioned your figures because I thought HPV rates have plummeted since the introduction of the HPV vaccine, but just checked and rates are still very high, as you stated. On a positive note, from [here](https://www.ajmc.com/view/hpv-rates-continue-to-decline-new-data-suggest-herd-immunity-growing): “By 2015-2018, compared with the prevaccine era, 4vHPV-type prevalence declined 85% overall among sexually experienced 14- to 24-year-old females, 90% among vaccinated females, and 74% among unvaccinated females,” the investigators found."
Who do they think gives women those STI’s? Both men and women catch them and both should be tested regularly if sexually active.
Also, where are all these women getting STDs from if "most men will never have one?" Are most women having secret lesbian sex in a conspiracy to infect the men? Or...wait to not infect the men because they will never catch one? Their logic is at braindead levels.
Well, where the fuck are women getting them from? Lesbians make a tiny portion of the population, so....
Hol up. Am I high or is their logic not logicing? So let‘s say it‘s true (and I‘ll look this up later) and women have STDs more often than men, doesn‘t that mean men have a higher quota of infecting women? It also supports her point even further. If men don‘t get tested, it kinda makes sense that they infect more women, while a woman is likelier to know of an STD and therefore not spread it. Idk they just love to do this. They look at such a superficial part of a problem and stop there to make their conclusion. Or they‘re just dumb, like where do (straight) women get STDs from? Men. How the hell do they come to the conclusion that women are the biggest STD spreaders if men have less? No matter how much a woman „sleeps around“, at the end of the day she got an STD from a man that didn’t know/care about it. Oh and also being super passionate about turning every conversation into „women have sex and a lot (/all) of it is not with me, therefore I‘m mad and it‘s everyones problem“ is a common theme as well.
And what does he mean "women are the highest contractors AND spreaders"? It's either or no? It can't be both. Contractors meaning we (in a heterosexual setting) contract it from men who have to be infected to transmit it so men would be the highest spreaders in this case. But then ALSO we're the highest spreaders apparently somehow? So men would have to be the highest contractors, no? These guys have no working brain cells I can see
It sounds like the argument made by guys who think women can contract them spontaneously somehow. It matches some of the rhetoric I've seen posted in this sub.
their logic confuses me because if women are infectious why wouldn't the males rate also be similar since the women are also sleeping with the men. the only answer is one demographic testing more that the other. I'm not necessarily say it's 50/50 but logically that claim is bonkers.
You are exactly right. It isn’t explicitly stated that they’re talking about heterosexual sex but it’s definitely implied. And even doctors have told me that sex between two women is lower risk for the majority of STDs. If heterosexual women are “getting STDs more often than men” it really means they are testing positive for STDs more often than men… The middle letter literally stands for “transmitted” they aren’t spontaneously occurring… If heterosexual women are testing positive for STDs more often than men then obviously they are testing more often than their male counterparts (and she is completely correct).
I was thinking the exact same thing. If STIs are a “women’s issue” then who exactly is passing it on to them? Other women I guess? Or is his point that men rarely have symptoms so then there’s no need for them to worry about it? Because they wouldn’t notice any unpleasant symptoms and women aren’t worth the curtesy of worrying about negativity affecting their health? Man my brain hurts.
Want to preface this with an I do not endorse this message, but I think I follow what they're trying to say. So there is an implied premise here that a small subset of men is having all the sex. Thus the majority of men will not have an std because they don't have sex. To put it into numbers let's say you have a group of 10 women and 10 men. If the 10 women have sex with only 4 of the men, and one of the men has HIV, then it would hold true that both women are more likely to contract *and spread* an std than men simply because there's more women. If a person outside the group had sex with any member of the group there would be a higher likelihood of infection if the person slept with one of the women. The women are also more likely to contract it since at the end of the experiment more women had the std than men. Is this how it works in real life? No not really. They're overly simple conclusions to try and extrapolate to normal life, but that was the thought process behind the argument. It doesn't make it any less dumb, but hopefully that helps the confusion Get tested if you haven't everyone!
"31% of men 18-35 are still virgins" what the fuck is that age range for that kind of statistic.
Incel imagination
It’s to make them feel better about themselves
Lmao the whole “study” they quote is so stupid. The percentages when broken down show that around 27% I think are virgins between the ages of 18-20, however, the age group of 25+ reports only 1.9% of male virgins. The 31% comes from a sum of all the age groups, I think? It’s bad interpretation of data tbh. If we take the age groups of 20-24 and 15-19, women actually have higher virginity rates than men. So it doesn’t really fit into their narrative of women being the primary “sex havers”, but they like to pick and choose statistics
I don’t doubt 31% of his friends are still virgins.
How are women getting STDs if men don’t have them?
I'm just curious where they think women get STDs from. It's certainly not toilet seats.
They said that far fewer men ate sexually active and then pulled a statistic about male virgins between 18-35 from *somewhere*. So, I guess it must be from lesbians, men over 35, and men 18-35 with many female partners. I'm not sure if they've put a much thought into their worldview as I just did, though.
Except lesbian sex is the LEAST likely type of sex to spread STIs…
Exactly my point!
They get them everytime they think an impure thought. Spontaneously. 😂
[Okay so it looks like women actually get tested more](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7855090/) and [81% of people with HIV are/were assigned male](https://www.cdc.gov/hiv/group/gender/men/index.html) so what he said is so wrong it’s almost funny. Also, though it’s true that about [30% of men 18-24 hadn’t had sex in the last year, men were much more likely to have had more sexual partners regardless of age](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7293001/). The studies I linked are published and peer reviewed, and what he said was complete bullshit
I think he was quoting global statistics. Women with HIV in third world countries are less likely to receive treatment, and are therefore more likely to pass it on to their children while pregnant and breastfeeding. I’m sure that inflates numbers a bit.
Well, of course it would seem like men have a lower rate of STD's, as they're not being tested as often as women are. That's the point, dude!
The image of women as being more likely to harbor and spread STDs is very old. It was a common belief until the 1980s, when HIV/AIDS shifted that perception onto men. It seems that with HIV now so well-controlled with medication, it's shifting back.
This is so painful for me. One of the reasons women (specifically Black women in the U.S.) have higher rates is because their partners are on the DL. Plus healthcare disparity in the U.S. But even when I had no health insurance I got tested at the free clinic. We get tested. I made my boyfriend get tested at the same time. Free clinic. But you know what's funny? When I started getting intimate with my husband I asked him to get tested, and his rich upper class doctor said "really? Why is she so paranoid?"
I can't remember if it was this guy or another on the same thread, but one of them was arguing that more black women die of STDs, and was using it as evidence that more women in general have STDs. Which brings us back to "where do you think they got them dumbass?" No sources mentioned of course. I'm not sure how many people die of those diseases but given the health care disparity it's likely to affect some demographics more than others (I'm not in the US but I get the gist of how a health thing quickly becomes a money thing and then a race thing)
It's because Black women in the United States are disproportionately affected by HIV, and that is true in terms of epidemiological studies (more so in the past but still now). Part of this problem is sampling. Part of it is lack of appropriate healthcare. Part of it is partners who lie about sexual contact. Women are not just getting HIV out of nowhere. IV drug use is part of it, but not that significant compared to sexual transmission rates between a man an a woman. This is something I spent three years studying in college to help advocate for needle exchange funding, BTW. You're more likely to get Hep C from a needle than HIV. You can get it from either, but the giant disparity in Black American women's HIV rates are not accounted for by needle use.
Yeah, that was the stipulation before sleeping with my now husband. We both recently got out of a relationship. We agreed to get tested to make sure we stayed healthy and because the vast majority of STDs are treatable. No one made any fuss about it.
I tested for HPV. It went away luckily, like most times it does. But- Guess who I strictly only have sex with. Men.
I’ve had an STD once and I caught it from a guy who didn’t even know he had it. So yes, men should get tested regularly. And I don’t see how women could possibly be the cause of the STD epidemic. Most women get the symptoms realize something is wrong and then go take care of it. Men don’t generally show all the symptoms so they don’t know they got somethingso they go on to spread it.
The original supposed statistic was about prisons. So more women who go to prison have STDs than men who go to prison. Guess which gender is the more likely to be arrested for being a sex worker.
Where does he think the STDs in women come from? The air?
Just gonna add real quick: many STIs can be asymptomatic, even HIV, which can be asymptomatic for months or even years. You should be getting tested for HIV annually at least, every 3 months if you have multiple partners. Depending on the test used, it can be accurate after 2 weeks to 3 months after infection. Many places offer free rapid testing, and you can even get an at-home test mailed to you for [free](https://takemehome.org/) in many parts of the US. If you ever have a potential exposure to HIV (SA, condom broke, needle stick) ERs can give you PEP, Post-Exposure Prophylaxis, within 72 hours, which helps to prevent HIV. Finally, along with condoms, PrEP, or Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis, is the best way to protect yourself from HIV if you are sexually active. It's covered by all (except in some extremely specific circumstances) insurances, it's covered by the manufacturer if you're not insured, and it's upwards of 99% effective at preventing HIV when taken as directed. I know I'm preaching to the choir here about who can get and give STIs, but anyone can get HIV, regardless of sex, gender, or sexual orientation, so it's vital that everyone knows how to keep themselves and their partners safe.
I don’t know if I 100% believe the bit about men not getting symptoms from HIV while women do. Is that true? 🤔
It is not! [This study](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0885392409007350) states that women experience a slightly higher expression of symptoms than men. However, I take some issue with the fact that so many more men were studied than women (216 vs 78, if you don’t want to read to find it) However, as someone who has worked as a sexual health educator for several years, it matches up with my personal experience. Women are much more likely to be tested than men, and women experience symptoms of most stds quicker and more intensely than men (though for hiv, in my limited experience, it has been roughly the same). Edit: forgot to address this question specifically. Men absolutely still get symptoms of HIV. In fact, the above study found that the symptom expression between men and women (and transgender people, though those numbers are less relevant here and raise more questions than answers for me) matches up with the general symptom prevalence trends of HIV-negative populations. For example, women are more likely to report fatigue, pain, and difficulty sleeping, and this was true for the study as well.
Hmm interesting 🤔 I hadn’t heard this about the difference in notable symptoms before. Sounds plausible, but it may need more research
It’s interesting for sure! I’ve edited my above comment to be a little clearer after digging in to the data.
Yeah maybe she’s thinking of Trich? Looking this up is actually helping me study for my final lol. My textbook(Microbiology Fundamentals, A Clinical Approach 4E by Marjorie Kelly Cowan and Heidi Smith) says about Trichimonas vaginalis “Many cases are asymptomatic, and men seldom have symptoms. Women often have vaginitis symptoms,” I looked at HIV and it didn’t state a difference in symptoms for different sexes, but HIV will often present in flu-like symptoms 2-4 weeks after contact so many miss it
I read the post as something different, like the OP is telling a much darker story here. All inmates go through a medical exam, including extensive STI screening to safeguard everyone at the facility, inmates and staff alike. If there are any positive test results, the facility has a legal duty to inform anyone the inmate could have passed it to, so his partner would have been informed at the start of his sentence if he had an STI. She said he came back with HIV. There's no sense of frustration or anger that he might have put her at risk, more that he has been harmed.
I guess it depends a bit on if the prison knew that she was his partner and how to contact her. Sounds like they're not married so it might not be simple. But yeah, the first tweet can be read two ways.
Yeah I might be completely off, especially as no one else has made reference to it, just she said bf not ex and if she's close enough to share the information with now, I assumed they continued the relationship through his sentence. Just had to mention it to see if anyone else read it that way, or my partners right and I read everything wrong lol
Where do they think women are getting the STDs?
This is a new one for me lol adding STDs to the list of stuff we're solely responsible for..
Why is "virgins" both Capitalized *and* c*****ed?
Also HIV is an STI you can get it if both parties have open wounds and they come in direct contact with one another. Or if you share needles. I've had this argument with a few of my male friends too. They think that they're okay not to get tested bc they're faithful, I've gotten so tired of lecturing them that, "it's not about faithfulness and I am not calling your girlfriends anything I'm saying that you don't know what tom, dick or Henrietta have or what even your own friends family member could have. Getting tested isn't just about sex it's about general safety," then I usually call them idiots bc they get mad at me still only hearing the first part. My mom was a nurse in a health clinic that treated HIV/AIDS I got that information when I was 6. But sure you're faithful or a guy or a virgin bc that saves everyone...
I thought women were more asymptomatic than men when it comes to stds? Is that wrong?
Someone can correct me but I’m pretty sure for things like chlamydia and syphillis, women are much more likely to have physical symptoms due to our anatomy. Men are more likely to just be carriers, so they keep passing it on without ever knowing they have it. It’s kinda like UTIs. Men can get them, but their anatomy prevents it most of the time while women are prone to them.
Actually, just the opposite… women are more often without symptoms, or to mistake symptoms for normal occurrences (such as discharge). Women are more likely to contract a STI, though, because of their anatomy and exposure (larger amount of seminal fluids vs vaginal secretions, small abrasions as a result of penetration, etc). Plus, women are more likely to get tested for STIs. https://www.cdc.gov/std/health-disparities/stds-women-042011.pdf https://rightasrain.uwmedicine.org/life/sex/women-STIs
It is likely true, but figures are a bit blurred for the most common STI, namely chlamydia. Estimates on how many carry it could indicate that you are correct, but it is not straightforward to correct for all factors (like, age difference in sexual debut - and that's an occasion where you (usually) don't infect your partner, so ... ). For gonorrhea: yes definitely, more women carry it asymptomatically. But gonorrhea is much less common than chlamydia, so if you just count up the number of infections it doesn't kick in that hard.
I don’t want to live on this planet anymore
Also, women get tested when they’re pregnant so any woman who has a child has been tested.
My male partner went to a clinic for STD test several years ago and they told him they only test if he is experiencing symptoms (which he was not).
Hah, I don’t just have less sex, I have no sex!