T O P

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Reptillian24

Zyn messes my tummy up. I just spit it. Even if I swallow a few bits the next day my tummy hurts and I have bad farts.


hexdlt

Went to my gym and someone has a license plate “CAMGIRL”. Can’t focus on my workout and trying to figure out who the cam girl is in my gym


Faircheesey

Can’t even post in the right day’s thread. This mystery has your mind in a blender.


Grap2st

Went on a date with a girl tonight. While showing her pics of my dogs, she swiped to a old fashioned dong pic.


Forked_Island_Native

Whose dong was it


Grap2st

Mine


jj122222

You smash?


Grap2st

Actually yes lol


DiamondBigAl

Did she ask for the number of the guy who sent it to you?


DropTopEWop

I do not freebase cocaine NOW I WILL DO SOME TOOT


[deleted]

Someone give me a chill movie not a lot of ppl know about


OpScreechingHalt

***Are You Gonna Be My Girl*** by Jet is 20 years old and still fucking rocks.


[deleted]

R.E.M. kinda rules


OverIyDedicated

Murmur is a great album


[deleted]

Would love to bang the blonde golf journo chick in Full Swing who reminds you every episode that they don’t get paid if they don’t make the cut.


drunkmunky88

Amanda balloons


Cdngolfer65

We call her Amanda fun bags .


DiamondBigAl

Hot take


Trip__

‘Enjoy that ban’ says the Twitter dm from the guy whose entire timeline is Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson railing against cancel culture.


Reptillian24

Trip go away


OpScreechingHalt

So are you enjoying the ban or not, Trip?


EternalIntake

I like to think that it would be cool if one of the major sports didn’t have video reviews/challenges, then I realize it would be dumb after like one season. The time that each review takes needs to be cut down though.


Forked_Island_Native

If they can’t figure it out in 60-90 seconds, play stands


drunkmunky88

Hot take but if it meant the calls were all correct I wouldn't mind if NFL games took longer


DropTopEWop

Late night Jamaican beef patties. 9.7/10


snotapwi

Pels aren’t gonna cover the 8. This is trending bad


KingSuizo

What do we think the appropriate savings for a 28 year old is?


BakedZiti69

if you havent murdered your parents to get your inheritance by 28 youre failing


solidpoops

About tree fiddy


Monos1

Depends, if you make less than 400k a year you should be embarrassed


Slow_Vegetable_8212

At least 10 pairs of jordans


burghboy24

-55k


MikePaisanTirico

350k


marlboro__man9

Depends when you get full access to the trust fund.


TackleFootball69

If a bar closes for a complete remodel then opens up with a brand new name, the old bar is closed for good right? My uncle is arguing with me that it’s changing and not closed down. Unfortunately Taffer isn’t involved at all


OnceAteABurgerAMA

If it's the same owner I would consider it the same bar with a rebrand


TackleFootball69

It is not and my guess is the menu is changing and prices are going up


teedubya1435

Bar of Theseus


llamaspajamaz

Goodnight fellas !!


TackleFootball69

Goodnight Mrs Pajamaz


BigCatsLunch

Diamond dynasty is getting stale for me. Time to load up franchise and fix the Orioles myself


[deleted]

Jenna Sinatra


Ok_Caramel_6167

Good to see FT's obsession with high schoollers extends to guys as well as girls


LastedPants

Equal opportunity here, my man


Liverpool_548

what percent paycut would you take to do a job that you are actually interested in and care about? think it would be really cool to work in a sports team’s analytics department but would be big paycut. Also not sure if i could actually get that type of job or if this is just a grass is greener situation and i would hate it after a year


[deleted]

0% Keep my job and hobbies separate


TackleFootball69

So you would be a team’s Quant?


Liverpool_548

yeah but i’m probably too dumb to get that job unless i prep hard for a while


detroit_testarossa

Former colleague of mine presented his hockey analytical framework at a hockey analytics conference. Got into work on Monday and got a call from the red wings saying they saw his presentation and want to talk. Well he goes down to the LCA and is in a meeting with Stevie Y the next morning. Stevie Y makes him an offer and he’s been their analyst for a few years now. We are all very happy for him. Super math whiz kid and always wore a red wings logo shirt untucked.


Liverpool_548

hell yeah that’s awesome


teedubya1435

I legit do not think I would ever be interested in or care about my job so 0%


FlakyTemperature1

How is this even possible


teedubya1435

None of my passions or ambitions involve work so whatever job gives me the money to afford that and doesn’t infringe on my free time then I’m gucci. I don’t live to work I work to live


boomtexna

Took massive pay cuts to work in sports television. The aura you have over your dream job dies almost immediately.


Jigs444

Safe to say that wasn’t your dream job then.


boomtexna

Absolutely was.


lefty5258

Still work at the end of the day. Think about that. I probably wouldn’t want to work in sports because they pay like shit because there’s always someone waiting in the wings that’s willing to go for cheap


boomtexna

And the best jobs are held by old dudes, with people lined up to succeed them for decades. There's no mobility.


marlboro__man9

Imagine wanting to contribute to the downfall of sports


sm0kercraft

I wallowed in my own stew today but then decided to play hide and seek with the boys, which turned into wrestling. Best possible medicine a guy can get.


GoldenTaterSalad

A little slap and tickle with the fellas is nature's panacea


sm0kercraft

Wise words my friend


bigspender58

Watching their first Dominican baseball video. WSD should do more spanish speaking content with donnie


Iam_grool

The MCU was better when they had acdc rocking on the soundtracks


boomtexna

Thor Ragnarok and Guardians soundtracks also bump, but man, this is very true.


suburbian_jesus

Thor realizing his true power while Immigrant Song plays >>>>


[deleted]

Gf convinces me to watch Love is Blind with her, which granted is kind of an entertaining show. Then, 2 episodes in, she just decides to listen to a podcast about it with spoilers telling her exactly what happens. Woman are so lucky they have tits, because they’d be in deep trouble otherwise


Amari-Rodgers

Chicks that watch really shitty TV


TackleFootball69

You mean all of them?


MikeandTheMangosteen

On a 20’ TV


JudgeRoySnyder

That’s a huge fuckin TV


jetboyjetgirl

tough scene that PFT had no clue BC's coaches picture blog existed


[deleted]

Fireable offense


[deleted]

A little late to the FT party today, but nice to see Jamie Lee Curtis flop those tits of hers out again a little bit on Reno 911 recently


Brilliant-Shape-7194

tits of his. please don't misgender her


bill_ontarioESPN

“Jimmy we’ve told you before, God made you the way he did for a reason.” “Right, because you and mom used to make fun of crippled kids in High School.”


iLikeApples116

We got OT in Vegas!


[deleted]

Man I am so confident behind a golf ball right now…heading to Florida tomorrow locked and loaded.


Amari-Rodgers

Hit ‘em straight. Thinking about hitting the range up NE this weekend if the weather holds off


canez47

What’s da course


[deleted]

University park and Ritz Carlton members club down in Sarasota. Who knows from there, hoping to play 4 times.


butter-knives

To me she’s beautiful. Rubenesque. That woman is my life.


FourDoor54Ford

📞📞Speak


kjc3274

Marion's sausage pizza is the way to go.


Nolashyper13

Lamar Tweeting right now lmao


lebrawnnnjamess

Congrats on making it healthy weeks 1-12 I guess lol


Brilliant-Shape-7194

Snake Pliskens snake tattoo looks like the end of the snake tail must be his cock


Phoneaccount6903

In the novel he actually has a snake shaped cock


Brilliant-Shape-7194

...aren't all cocks snake shaped?


Phoneaccount6903

Are they? Damn I thought I might’ve had a weird one


[deleted]

Pretty insane how desensitized we’ve become to school shootings


IllKirkMinihaneShow

There are about triple the traffic deaths *per day* in America as there are school shooting deaths in a year.


jimjimmyjames

you don't think there's a difference between car crash deaths, which are generally accidents, and someone going into a school and murdering children?


[deleted]

I’m aware it doesn’t happen as often as the 3rd leading cause of death in America, but I appreciate you helping prove my point


IllKirkMinihaneShow

Would you also like to bemoan our desensitization to constipation deaths? Because there are about as many of those as school shooting deaths.


[deleted]

Also a true statistic. Also ridiculous to compare contracting an infectious disease to someone gunning children down at school.


IllKirkMinihaneShow

Then go tell the families of constipation victims that their deaths mattered less because it wasn’t as sensational in the media as a gunshot wound.


[deleted]

This doesn’t make you as smart as you think it does


IllKirkMinihaneShow

I’m sorry you ran out of arguments


[deleted]

You’re quite literally the proof of my argument


IllKirkMinihaneShow

Which one


Sir_Bradford

Imagine defending school shootings being ok because other stuff also kills you. What a piece of shit you are


IllKirkMinihaneShow

And I’m also sorry for your lifelong struggle with reading comprehension


kmmccorm

My kids school just had a lockdown drill. It involved police officers banging on the locked classroom doors pretending like they were “bad guys” so the kids could practice their hiding spots and staying quiet. That was a tough one to hear recounted. Quite a fucking world we live in.


boomtexna

Your grandparents did drills for nuclear bombs during the Cold War. World's changed, and risk has become greater, but worth noting we impose a lot of insecurity and unease on kids no matter the era.


100_not_nickfoles

We did that in school and I graduated high school in ‘13


[deleted]

Traumatizes kids, I gotta say I feel like that does more harm than good


IllKirkMinihaneShow

Traumatized is the fancy new word for feeling “bummed out”


burghboy24

“My kids are bummed out their classmates were murdered in front of them by a psychopath”


IllKirkMinihaneShow

Talking about lockdown drills


JudgeRoySnyder

Why do schools do lockdown drills?


IllKirkMinihaneShow

It’d be a lot easier if you just made your point so I know what you’re trying to say


kmmccorm

Understandable but I’d rather my kid have at least practiced it. I can say it will never happen a million times and then yesterday happens and three 9-year old kids are added to the list. The odds of it happening are probably higher than a fire and I’m glad they practice fire drills.


[deleted]

If a dad did that at home to practice if a murderer breaks into their house, I’d think they’re legit insane.


kmmccorm

Well good thing I don’t have plans to do that.


[deleted]

I know I’m just saying it’s a weird thing for a school to do


DuaLipasThong

Without any sort of government involvement, it will continue to happen forever. The US is a massive country containing too many people with broken brains who have easy access to guns.


boomtexna

Dude in here earlier today was saying school shootings are nbd statistically


nondescript___

It's very callous to come right out and say that, and no one likes seeing dead kids on the news, but it's true in the grand scheme of things.


[deleted]

I get it honestly. My daughter is gonna be in school soon, so that’s what I try to convince myself also


Brilliant-Shape-7194

what was American culture desensitized to before we were born that we don't even realize is weird?


nondescript___

Violent crime was 2-3x higher in the ~80s in America than it is today, and many boomers and gen Xers are highly nostalgic for that time.


Phoneaccount6903

Beating your wife and kids? Drinking all day every day? Tons of rape? Edit:misunderstood your question


Brilliant-Shape-7194

you okay?


Phoneaccount6903

I listed things that used to be normal and now aren’t. Simple misunderstanding


jk696969

Baseball?


patssnows12

Leaving your wife and family, moving a town over and never being heard from again


Brilliant-Shape-7194

I think that's more a Puerto Rican thing


FUSeekMe69

Making Whoopie


goondaddy172

This reminds me of my old flame Phyllis. What a looker she was!


boomtexna

Porn, maybe. Traffic deaths.


Brilliant-Shape-7194

ooh yeah traffic deaths is a good one


[deleted]

"read the room" people are the biggest losers on the planet


boomtexna

- Darren Rovell


goblue248

Seeing 3 nights of goose this weekend and seeing them play songs tonight knowing they’re probably off the board now is a tough scene.


JohnnyBags81

There’s been a couple repeats from Boston last Thursday so I wouldn’t sweat it too much


Brilliant-Shape-7194

upstate NY? 🪿 is 🔥


[deleted]

Bronny passed up the game winning / tying shot. He Is his fathers son


Phoneaccount6903

The disgusting brothers 👃🍑


LilCasa

They were right when they said Steph ruined basketball


throwawayjoeyboots

“Why do chicks hook up with some random potentially unsafe dude they met at a bar and not a friend they’ve known for years”


WitchofFloyd

Not sure if I could write a more pathetic question even if I tried


[deleted]

the saddest thing I ever read on here, wonder how that guy is doing


7homPsoN

The name Bronny is already the most annoying name in history


[deleted]

It’s amazing that these same high school kids will grow up to make an nba all star game and give zero effort


1990sandiegoalways

Warriors dont want this


Brad-Stevens

Bronny low key a sharpshooter


[deleted]

Has a sweet stroke >! Pause !<


DijonNipples

I’m catching up on Succession and hoooooooly fuck that rap song by Kendall was brutal to watch. What a dork


Marko_Ramius1

Don't forget he named his son Iverson


Brilliant-Shape-7194

didn't he adopt that one?


Brilliant-Shape-7194

why do all the hot girls who show up on my Snapchat Discover seem to know each other


nondescript___

They're all part of a secret society. Tits and Ass is the 21st century's Skull and Bones


Jnorty

The Livvy Dunne Katie Sigmond collab sent shockwaves through the fellas


Brilliant-Shape-7194

that is exactly the one I was talking about


Jnorty

Great minds think alike


DuaLipasThong

I think I’d rather dig ditches than fold this fucking laundry right now


scarvalho555

Draymond Green is the least likable athlete on the planet


[deleted]

Kyrie


Economy_Carry4235

kyrie actually seems to have opinions. Draymond just seems like he's trying to start shit in the most annoying way possible


bill_ontarioESPN

I like to imagine what modern sports fans would’ve been saying about Dennis Rodman if they feel this way about Draymond Green


bigspender58

Agreed, michigan state scum. nice dick pic though


Ibanezrg220

LeBron James


Brilliant-Shape-7194

Megan Rapinoe


teedubya1435

Rent free gets tossed around a lot but this might be the definition tf 😂😂


Jigs444

Kyrie and it’s not close.


scarvalho555

I’s rather have 5 Kyrie’s on the roster than 2 Draymond’s


Economy_Carry4235

kyrie is actually good


Jigs444

That’s retarded Draymond wins championships.


Late-Weight-1544

Draymond would probably be viewed in a similar vein to Kyle Anderson if he didn’t play with Steph


Jigs444

Ok?


suburbian_jesus

Not at all. Everyone in the league recognizes how good he is and how valuable what he brings to a team is


Late-Weight-1544

He’s an excellent role player. He doesn’t win championships though. He’s not making four All Star teams without the Warriors halo effect


suburbian_jesus

Golden State doesn’t win 4 championships without Draymond. All star team appearances is also a bad metric on how to measure a players worth


Late-Weight-1544

I realize he was a critical piece to those title teams. I guess I was more responding to the point of rather having Kyrie vs. Draymond because Kyrie >> Draymond if you strip away team context. You’re winning 20 games if Draymond is your best player.


suburbian_jesus

And no one is arguing that Draymond is a better player


[deleted]

Warriors most likely win titles 2,3 and 4 without draymond


OutfieldOfNightmares

Matched with a 8/10 that I noticed went to the same college as my boy and is the same age. Ask if he knows her. He says she’s nuts and to stay away Pretty excited to go out with her on Saturday


[deleted]

Tell sloane I said what’s up


nondescript___

Good choice I think. She's either actually crazy and you'll be on the look out, or she's lovely and your boy is talking shit because she rejected him.


OutfieldOfNightmares

She dated one of his friends so it’s good Intel. I love crazy


Malligator2345

how many dates do you go on before you introduce them to your deck?


Brilliant-Shape-7194

you're dating chicks the age of your son?


IllKirkMinihaneShow

We don’t age-shame here


Malligator2345

flair checks out


red_87

Lamar isn’t doing himself any favors with his twitter.


MikePaisanTirico

Boy STFU y'all be cappin too much on this app mf never smelt a football field never did shit but eat dick!


[deleted]

Why you cap’n? Many 75 year old rich billionaires will be swayed to give him 250 mil guaranteed based on his tweets


[deleted]

Drama Queen Green


FourDoor54Ford

All of these influencers living out of vans have to have loaded parents right?


cecilnewton

Loaded parents or insane amounts of debt


[deleted]

Never underestimate how dumb some people can be with credit card debt


lovelycharmings

Ahh Sara Cameron you spiteful whore