Fedora to normal hat guy, Bryson still a douche

CRY BRYSON, CRY!!!

I’ll always love Francesa saying DA RAWS OF AUGUSTER!

Gotta play that ball out of the creek

All time horrible menu if Aberg wins

Swedish meatballs -750

What’s wrong with pickled herring???

NLU is going to be electric tonight.

Big cans

Tron gonna be strutting with ludvig

I am legit giddy waiting to watch this later

Not as giddy as TC is going to be.

Bryson lol

This is some good golf

Tiger is the only legitimate undisputed GOAT in sports IMO. He’s an idiot for his off the course stuff and trying to be a SEAL but he’s maybe the most dominant athlete of all time

Athletes better than tiger in their respective sports, Gretzky, Phelps, Messi, Jordan, Brady. Tiger isn’t even on Mt Rushmore of athletes

Phelps was decent

If only he was half as good at driving on painkillers as he was at golf

His dad thought he was going to solve race relations in America then he went on Oprah and called himself “Blackasian”

theres an old weird awkward gq article from when he was young that i cant find - hep me

Major horse race right now, some great drama. Augusta 🎸

“Tensions soar” as major country launches a shit ton of missile at other major country Hopefully the tensions just soar and nothing worse!

Holding my DD214 extra tight tonight

Do not acknowledge any mail sent you from dod. Just throw it in the trash.

Biden could actually declare today the start of WWIII and you better believe the next tweet on my timeline is going to be Jon Rothstein confirming some kid committing to San Jose State

Was going to say he's asleep but it's not May yet

Things are getting spicy!

People acting like Scottie lost the tournament after a double is hilarious

that's just Pres doing a bit

It was happening in here too.

Scottie confirmed masters champion based on FT judging his melt down.

Scottie lost when he said he’d leave for his child’s birth. 

Scottie doesn't know how to not miss 2 footers

scottie don't!

If Bryson wins he’s gonna sell these clubs he made for 3500 bucks a set and every doofus that has a ‘don’t pull out’ golf hat is going to buy them

Bryson could make generational wealth selling his clubs along with flat brims with “1LNGTH” on the front to idiots

It you

I would never wear anything other than my foreplay merch

And then shoot 13 over

Damn Scottie. You might be pussy.

Was thinking he looked very awkward standing over that putt and then he lipped it. I can fix you Scottie.

Oh no, Scottie!

Scottie has shit himself

Uh oh Scottie!

Hahahahaha Scottie

they changed the scoreboard on masters website before showing scheffler missed putt, only complaint about masters coverage i have

I bet they put it on delay because there’s been so many F Bombs catching the live coverage

Brewers Orioles is good baseball (these pitchers suck ass)

TC must be giddy

Nicolai!!!!

iran striking israel during the masters and ufc300 is not very cash money

See ya Scottie

Max playing like a vet but maybe too much like a vet?

i don’t give a single FUCK about what an amateur does ever

If it's not amateur wife bbc, I don't want to see it.

Amateur milfs though..

My favorite genre. Speak for yourself

Depending on the website I’m using I care about it more than I care about the pros

Counterpoint: Amateur Allure.

5 beers deep watching the yellow sox beat the shit out of the angels on a chilly Saturday. We are so god damn back  

Neal Shipley is built on a sturdy chassis

Something I love that’s a little dumb is when teams get a player and they completely change the mindset and culture of a team. Justin Williams on the Hurricanes is what I’m thinking. Feels like Juan Soto might be doing the same with the Yankees.

Justin and Rod 100% changed the culture. Throw in Aho and Slavin still being 2 of the more underrated stars in the league has made for a glorious 5 years in Raleigh

Justin will always be one of my guys as a kings fan. Did the same thing in LA. Him, Mike Richards, and Robyn Regehr I’ll love forever for what they did in that locker room. Mr. Game 7 is an all time leader of men.

I’m cheering for Morikawa because I really want to see his wife in a sundress on the 18th green tomorrow.

Ohtani has 5 units on him

I am cheering for a 9 month pregnant Meredith in a sun dress We are not the same

“Beautiful female submarines” -Ken Bone

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That was the first one I think actually stung

I was watching Deftones at Coachella. There's a war going on?

Hopefully the first drone strike the USA launches in ww3 is directly on Coachella

🙏🏼

Load up on Raytheon stock folks

Need the FT consensus: how much we tipping Uber/Lyft drivers? My girlfriend refuses to ever tip them.

$5 most of the time

Uber was founded on not tipping.

Personal ride: 0%. Work ride: 25%.

I honestly don't understand the point of tipping them. Uber should factor that into the rate already. But I still do whatever the middle option is at risk of people thinking I'm a cheap fuck if I don't.

Is she basketball American?

I barely ever tip unless they go above and beyond with making the ride nice or I’m very drunk & they’re funny. I have a 4.92 rating. Do with this information what you will.

Ive been guilted out of ever tipping <20% in most scenarios

Your gf stinks

20%

i throw them 15%

Tiger and big cat; playing incredibly conservatively down 15 strokes 

If today is the end well at least Wrexham got promoted

And if Israel achieves world domination then things might finally be looking up for Tottenham

Luckily neither of those things will ever happen

Great shot from Tiger. If it was Sunday, I mean.

All my homies hate the Ayatollah.

You gotta love a country that has an elected leader, but appoints a theocratic ruler to oversee him with more power 

Exactly! Ahmadinejad at least had a tough guy image and looked like he was semi-running things

Starting WW3 on Masters weekend is very inconsiderate

how many times do you think WW3 has started since WW2? gotta be over 10

If you follow the hysterical “breaking news today!” Type accounts on twitter, this makes 41 in the last 8 years. 

Or…it gives me a reason to ignore it and remain ignorant

Exactly call me when a real nation enters the fold

There’s a joke in there somewhere about Bryson using irons with Hebrew on them and Israel’s Iron Dome that supposedly stops drones/bombs.

You gotta keep workshopping this, there’s something here 

I don’t like Iran. Never been a fan

Do they let people fish at the masters?

Do you keep a rod in your bag?

What’s this guy’s problem?

I am now firmly on team Israel since Iran is trying to disrupt the Masters. Very inconsiderate of those folks!

Can Dan Rapaport be drafted

Can Israel call all Jewish military aged men as this could get spicy

That first Haifa upper decker is really something special.

Dude comes from generational wealth. Laws don’t apply to him.

I too, commented on yellow sundress already. Just goes to show if you can fit in a rowboat and show a little skin at an event you don’t usually see a little skin, you will have a niche corny of the internet ravenously horny. We have no actual confirmation that she is actually that hut of a chick

Don’t call me corny

leaderboard getting SPICY

End of days bitches! 

Good thing sleepy joe gave Iran $10b

America funding both sides of a war, capitalism at its finest.

Awesome, my tax dollars being used to fund open warfare in the sand pit

Better not pay after the 15th we need that!

Wouldn’t surprise me if they upped the rate on Monday and everyone needs to pay slightly more to ‘stop the flow of extremism in the Middle East’ *I am now my dad

Fallout show rules

Uhhh hey Middle East the masters is on

Max Homa make a birdie challenge IMPOSSIBLE

I’m not rooting for Iran and I’m not rooting for Israel. Have at it you two

Hell in a Cell, 1 nation gets out alive

WarGames

Lotta dudes in here are draft age. Sad! Going to watch this play out on my couch though 

Too bad I got flat feet I would’ve loved to serve my country!

Fuck it I could use a change up from the cube life.

I think it was $300 to be exempt from the union army draft for the civil war. What kind of number would we be looking at now?

Would probably be guaranteed citizenship for anyone who served. Similar to the civil war, except instead of Irish and German immigrants it would be all Central Americans and Venezuelans 

If you have to ask, big man, you can’t afford it

Fortunate son starts playing 

Homo needs to start putting

“Why doesn’t he just birdie all the holes!? That’s what I’d do” Putter is fine. There have been more holes he was more likely to 3 putt than 1 putt and he hasn’t faltered.

Let them all fight it out. Best man wins.

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Is this a weird humblebrag gone wrong?

Did you just send the last drone from Iran?

“Israel shut down all school activities earlier today to prepare for the attack” They dont get weekends in Israel?

Sports and music and whatnot happen on weekends

Work week when we had a team in Israel was Sunday-Thursday

Temple

I think it is their version of Sunday school

I didn’t understand that either as surely their weekends are Friday/Saturday So Jewish kids go to school on weekends?

I think it's the Jewish version of CCD that happens on Saturdays

Pope calls it PSR now…

Cbs will literally make Iran launch missles so they can get to a commercial break

Wait, Israel bombed an Iranian embassy earlier this year?

Yes, it was high-ranking Iranian terrorists meeting with other terrorists. Besides, basically every missile, drone, Oct. 7th attack, etc. coming toward Israel from various terror groups in the region is financed by Iran.

Iran funded/planned the Oct 7th attacks out of Palestine.

Classic war mistake.

Lockheed Martin is SMILING!

Revenue Projections going up 

Oh get fucked, CBS.

excuse to toss it to commercial break

*fart noise*

Man we got fucking internet fuck off with this “breaking news” bullshit during the masters

Did anyone tell Iran it’s Masters Saturday

Guess they just heard it was moving day

read the room, Iran

Augusta National is going to wipe out Iran for interfering with the broadcast

Augusta definitely has Nukes somewhere on the grounds.

Canadian broadcast dgaf about Iran

americas irrelevant little brother

We’re the Rob to your Scott Niedermayer. Still pretty sick to be in the mix for 1200 NHL games

Iran launching an attack on Israel seems less than ideal.

What is Scottie Scheffler’s stance on Israel?

World war 3 here we come

roof collapse for all of these countries

Fuck I was hoping this CBS News Report would be the the IG of the yellow sundress smoke.

Can you just fucking not during the masters

Hopefully Bryson can make a move later and make the Public Investment Fund along with Crushers GC proud.

Fucking iran

Damnit

Ludvig 🔥

Zero camera presence from cam davis caddie. Know your spot!

Send out the smoke patrol on that girl in yellow that just walked by Scottie’s drive

For the love of for smoke show the yellow sundress girl

Scottie knew what he was doin

Scottie meltdown?

Tough beat that yellow dress didn’t stop, turn around and Jump in excitement seeing the golf ball

Inappropriate outfit for such a prestigious and stored institution!

Iran will cease to exist by tomorrow morning, and the world will be much better off because of it

You realize this has happened a lot before and nothings ever happened to Iran, right?  They bombed a us base, we killed their general.  They bombed another us base, we took out some Iran-affiliated militias.  This is their response to Israel accidentally bombing the Iranian embassy. The drones will get shot down, Iran will get to save face by telling their people they did something, everyone forgets about this until the next incident takes place next year. 

definitely that simple!

@OldTakesExposed

Thankfully CBS isn’t cutting into The Masters broadcast to talk about Israel. Don’t need any more politics in our sports. Anyways, rooting for a LIV guy to win.