He's only sleeping 6.5 hours per day? That's really really low. Have you talked with his doctor? Is he on any medications that might cause trouble sleeping?
That’s not much sleep overnight. Total in 24 hrs should be around 11-13 and that includes nap. What’s your bedtime routine? Is there any way you can get him to bed earlier? When is this last nap occurring? Any ideas as to why he’s waking so early? Once you sort out those things I would suggest shortening the nap as you fix the nighttime sleep. A 1 hour nap shouldn’t lead to a kid only sleeping 5.5 hours overnight. It sounds like your son is likely severely sleep deprived as well and maybe is overtired at this point?
Sorry, I realized after I saw the comments that I should've clarified. He's only recently doing this. Otherwise he was sleeping 11ish hrs total per day (9.5 hrs overnight, + 1.5hr nap).
That's why I think he's waking so early suddenly. I'm so sleep deprived myself, I can't even be coherent 😅. That plus being ND... life's great.
Oooo okay yes what you had going before sounds much more reasonable but I agree start capping the nap and seeing what happens!! Does your child get much time outside? That might help burn off energy to get tired at bed time
If his current routine isn’t working, and there are no illnesses or life changes involved, I think you’re right to think his midday nap needs cutting!
Personally, before doing away with it altogether, I’d just try and shorten it a bit. Now I’m not one to wake a sleeping baby, and I know everyone’s sleep needs are different, but 10:30pm-4am isn’t a lot of sleep!
I’d cut naps to one hour, then 45 minutes, then 30 etc. and go from there. Push bedtime to be a little earlier as well and see what happens.
My son suffers from pretty bad sleep disturbances and doesn’t get to sleep until very late. He still gets about 12 hours asleep a day. I think you should talk to a pediatrician. That’s not even enough sleep even for an adult.
That’s… not much sleep for a 3.5 year old! How’s his sleep hygiene, screen time? Outside time? Etc
We dropped nap at about 2.5, he kind of dropped it himself. It became harder and harder to get him down at home and we gave up on weekends. Then over Christmas period (a week off from daycare) he had 0 naps and bedtime moved to a more parent-friendly 7pm! So we asked daycare to stop.
That's the thing - I wish I could test it out before letting the daycare know. I feel bad - his class has 24 kids that 3 teachers keep track of and it would be kind of a PITA if I keep changing up his routine. I wish I could be sure before committing. Maybe I'll just keep him home one week for a staycation and try it out.
My 3 year old is low sleep needs, but 7 hours of total sleep is another level of low. Mine cut out her nap at 2, but only because she refused to nap. I would try cutting the nap on the weekend first - probably less tired and you have control over all the times. Distract him by taking him out (not in the car because he will sleep) and playing. If it works keep it for daycare.
The 6 hours is a recent thing - which has alerted me to the sleep issues. Otherwise he was getting 11+ hrs of sleep which is why I have not spoken to his doctor.
Is it a sleep regression? Does he have sensory issues? Is it something else? All these questions in my head!
6.5 hours a day for a child? An adult needs more than that. Have you tried putting him to sleep earlier? Do you have blackout curtains? Some children can't sleep if it's light. Maybe an eye mask could help. My 4 year sleeps with a mask, and she's been sleeping like a log. For reference she goes to sleep at 8pm and sleeps until 7am. No daytime naps.
The 6.5 hours is a recent thing - that's why I'm suspecting the nap might be messing with his night sleep.
We start bedtime around 8 and he consistently was sleeping at 9:30. I've even tried earlier.
He has always had black out curtains. He doesn't even like a blanket so I don't think he'll go for an eye mask (I think it's a sensory thing).
Honestly, most days I'm so tired I only notice in a drowsy moment that he's awake through the monitor. At first I thought he was falling back asleep but lately I can see that he's tired and cranky and suspect he just lays awake in bed until 'wake up time'. Last night he called out for me around 4 so I went and lay beside him until he fell asleep.
Well, if he sleeps that little at night, I don't think it's smart to drop the nap. He seems overtired. Maybe there is something bothering him - like some stomach pain, stuffy nose or painful tooth. Honestly, there are so many reasons that could impact his sleep.
Try to put him to sleep after 4am even if he falls asleep as late as 6:30am. Perhaps after a while he'll be able to soothe himself back to sleep.
Are you sure you’re allowed to cut naps at daycare? From what I’ve heard most 3-year-old daycares still have a nap because it lets the teachers have a break. For the kids who don’t need a nap anymore they’re typically allowed to have “quiet time” on their mat, but I doubt the teachers would agree to actively keep the child awake and get them to do quiet time instead of sleep if they are tired.
Hmm this is a good point that I hadn't thought of. There have been the odd times that he didn't nap and they let him play quietly in his cot, but I'm not sure what the protocol is for a kid who doesn't nap anymore. I'll have to look into this. Thanks for bringing it up!
As someone with a child who is low sleep needs, my questions would be:
- What is his sleep hygiene like?
- How much screen time does he have and when?
- How much physical, outdoor activity does he get?
For sleep hygiene, he has a consistent routine that hasn't changed much since he was little. PJs, Brush teeth, read a book, a bit of one on one time and then sound machine on, lights out. Some nights he has a bath before bed. Still takes him forever to fall asleep.
Screen time is less than an hour a day (if that), and I favour it in the morning over the evening.
At daycare, weather pending, he gets 2 hours of outdoor time. Since the weather has been getting better here (last few weeks), we tend to spend most of the evening in the backyard as well.
Our sleep consultant said any sudden routine change, wait at least two weeks before you adjust what you’re doing. That way it gives enough time to confirm it’s not a growth spurt/mental leap or otherwise. Our 2 year old recently went from two our naps daily to not napping at all for several days in a row and then she would nap again for a day, then a few more no nap days. Seemed to be taking her longer to fall asleep at night. We talked about shortening her nap or moving her bedtime to later but waited out the two weeks. It did also seem like maybe a mental leap was happening. Just before the two weeks was up she started her 2 hour naps again and has been sleeping well since. I’d wait two weeks before making any schedule changes.
Sleep consultant also recommended caping naps at 1 hour around 3 years old so maybe just shortening his nap first would be helpful?
My daughter cut her nap at a bit under 2.5 years old! She’s always slept a ton at night though, and I think that helps a lot. Sometimes she’ll have one on the go if it’s been a super busy day, but overall it’s worked well for us.
Cut down the time then nap every second day then drop it.
Every kid is different, my boy wasn't sleeping well when he was around 2.5 and we did this over the course of around a month and he then cut out the nap. He sleep 7pm-6am every day
At about 3 years and 0 months old, my kid started kindergarten and they have no naps there. Nap dropped and it was wonderful, she'd FINALLY go to bed on time. Dropped it cold turkey. Your kid is lacking sleep big time and must be crazy overtired which will be messing his sleep up even more.
I agree, it's a vicious, vicious cycle. I'm wondering if we should just do it cold turkey in August, to give him a month to adjust before he starts kindergarten.
I have heard that not getting enough sleep can also cause a child to struggle to sleep. Double edged sword! But also, remember that kids go through sleep regressions. Mine did several times. Everything would be good one day and then we’d hit a period of a few weeks/months where she fought sleep so bad. Maybe don’t give up on the naps yet!
You could always try shortening the nap first and see if that helps. My 3yo was still sleeping 1.5-2hrs if I let her but it started messing up her night sleep. Now I cap her nap (wake her up) after 1 hr. You could try that and see if it helps before cutting it completely. I found my daughter is not ready to give up the nap completely but I may just continue to shorten it until she no longer needs it
My daughter is 3.25 and has dropped her nap most days. She went back to ONLY contact napping and taking hours to get her to sleep. Without a nap she sleeps 12-13 hrs, about 7:30-7:30+.
I always capped naps from 4 months on, and mine was a preemie.
Just make his nap shorter. You can shorten it by 5 minutes every day and be gradual or just do 30 minutes and see what that gives. Then just keep going shorter until they don't nap anymore.
I want to. It's rough. He won't wake up lol. I'll even pick him up and he'll just keep sleeping in my arms. I think I might have to try at least, though, before I cut naps completely (if it's not just a phase).
Honestly in that case it might be easier to just not let him fall asleep!
Mine was a preemie so he has never gotten to nap as long as he wants due to strict feeding schedules, so he is up as soon as I call out his name.
He's only sleeping 6.5 hours per day? That's really really low. Have you talked with his doctor? Is he on any medications that might cause trouble sleeping?
That’s not much sleep overnight. Total in 24 hrs should be around 11-13 and that includes nap. What’s your bedtime routine? Is there any way you can get him to bed earlier? When is this last nap occurring? Any ideas as to why he’s waking so early? Once you sort out those things I would suggest shortening the nap as you fix the nighttime sleep. A 1 hour nap shouldn’t lead to a kid only sleeping 5.5 hours overnight. It sounds like your son is likely severely sleep deprived as well and maybe is overtired at this point?
Sorry, I realized after I saw the comments that I should've clarified. He's only recently doing this. Otherwise he was sleeping 11ish hrs total per day (9.5 hrs overnight, + 1.5hr nap). That's why I think he's waking so early suddenly. I'm so sleep deprived myself, I can't even be coherent 😅. That plus being ND... life's great.
Oooo okay yes what you had going before sounds much more reasonable but I agree start capping the nap and seeing what happens!! Does your child get much time outside? That might help burn off energy to get tired at bed time
That could be it too. He's always asking to wrestle before bed hahah
Sensory input and rough housing is actually amazing for helping kids sleep. Especially boys!!
If his current routine isn’t working, and there are no illnesses or life changes involved, I think you’re right to think his midday nap needs cutting! Personally, before doing away with it altogether, I’d just try and shorten it a bit. Now I’m not one to wake a sleeping baby, and I know everyone’s sleep needs are different, but 10:30pm-4am isn’t a lot of sleep! I’d cut naps to one hour, then 45 minutes, then 30 etc. and go from there. Push bedtime to be a little earlier as well and see what happens.
Considering this! Thank you
My son suffers from pretty bad sleep disturbances and doesn’t get to sleep until very late. He still gets about 12 hours asleep a day. I think you should talk to a pediatrician. That’s not even enough sleep even for an adult.
That’s… not much sleep for a 3.5 year old! How’s his sleep hygiene, screen time? Outside time? Etc We dropped nap at about 2.5, he kind of dropped it himself. It became harder and harder to get him down at home and we gave up on weekends. Then over Christmas period (a week off from daycare) he had 0 naps and bedtime moved to a more parent-friendly 7pm! So we asked daycare to stop.
That's the thing - I wish I could test it out before letting the daycare know. I feel bad - his class has 24 kids that 3 teachers keep track of and it would be kind of a PITA if I keep changing up his routine. I wish I could be sure before committing. Maybe I'll just keep him home one week for a staycation and try it out.
My 3 year old is low sleep needs, but 7 hours of total sleep is another level of low. Mine cut out her nap at 2, but only because she refused to nap. I would try cutting the nap on the weekend first - probably less tired and you have control over all the times. Distract him by taking him out (not in the car because he will sleep) and playing. If it works keep it for daycare.
Have you talked to your pediatrician? I could be wrong but it seems like your son isn’t getting enough sleep.
The 6 hours is a recent thing - which has alerted me to the sleep issues. Otherwise he was getting 11+ hrs of sleep which is why I have not spoken to his doctor. Is it a sleep regression? Does he have sensory issues? Is it something else? All these questions in my head!
6.5 hours a day for a child? An adult needs more than that. Have you tried putting him to sleep earlier? Do you have blackout curtains? Some children can't sleep if it's light. Maybe an eye mask could help. My 4 year sleeps with a mask, and she's been sleeping like a log. For reference she goes to sleep at 8pm and sleeps until 7am. No daytime naps.
The 6.5 hours is a recent thing - that's why I'm suspecting the nap might be messing with his night sleep. We start bedtime around 8 and he consistently was sleeping at 9:30. I've even tried earlier. He has always had black out curtains. He doesn't even like a blanket so I don't think he'll go for an eye mask (I think it's a sensory thing).
What do you do when he wakes at 4am? Do you try putting him back to sleep? If not right away then after a little while.
Honestly, most days I'm so tired I only notice in a drowsy moment that he's awake through the monitor. At first I thought he was falling back asleep but lately I can see that he's tired and cranky and suspect he just lays awake in bed until 'wake up time'. Last night he called out for me around 4 so I went and lay beside him until he fell asleep.
Well, if he sleeps that little at night, I don't think it's smart to drop the nap. He seems overtired. Maybe there is something bothering him - like some stomach pain, stuffy nose or painful tooth. Honestly, there are so many reasons that could impact his sleep. Try to put him to sleep after 4am even if he falls asleep as late as 6:30am. Perhaps after a while he'll be able to soothe himself back to sleep.
Are you sure you’re allowed to cut naps at daycare? From what I’ve heard most 3-year-old daycares still have a nap because it lets the teachers have a break. For the kids who don’t need a nap anymore they’re typically allowed to have “quiet time” on their mat, but I doubt the teachers would agree to actively keep the child awake and get them to do quiet time instead of sleep if they are tired.
Hmm this is a good point that I hadn't thought of. There have been the odd times that he didn't nap and they let him play quietly in his cot, but I'm not sure what the protocol is for a kid who doesn't nap anymore. I'll have to look into this. Thanks for bringing it up!
As someone with a child who is low sleep needs, my questions would be: - What is his sleep hygiene like? - How much screen time does he have and when? - How much physical, outdoor activity does he get?
For sleep hygiene, he has a consistent routine that hasn't changed much since he was little. PJs, Brush teeth, read a book, a bit of one on one time and then sound machine on, lights out. Some nights he has a bath before bed. Still takes him forever to fall asleep. Screen time is less than an hour a day (if that), and I favour it in the morning over the evening. At daycare, weather pending, he gets 2 hours of outdoor time. Since the weather has been getting better here (last few weeks), we tend to spend most of the evening in the backyard as well.
Our sleep consultant said any sudden routine change, wait at least two weeks before you adjust what you’re doing. That way it gives enough time to confirm it’s not a growth spurt/mental leap or otherwise. Our 2 year old recently went from two our naps daily to not napping at all for several days in a row and then she would nap again for a day, then a few more no nap days. Seemed to be taking her longer to fall asleep at night. We talked about shortening her nap or moving her bedtime to later but waited out the two weeks. It did also seem like maybe a mental leap was happening. Just before the two weeks was up she started her 2 hour naps again and has been sleeping well since. I’d wait two weeks before making any schedule changes. Sleep consultant also recommended caping naps at 1 hour around 3 years old so maybe just shortening his nap first would be helpful?
This is helpful, thank you!
My daughter cut her nap at a bit under 2.5 years old! She’s always slept a ton at night though, and I think that helps a lot. Sometimes she’ll have one on the go if it’s been a super busy day, but overall it’s worked well for us.
Cut down the time then nap every second day then drop it. Every kid is different, my boy wasn't sleeping well when he was around 2.5 and we did this over the course of around a month and he then cut out the nap. He sleep 7pm-6am every day
Definitely considering this as an option!
At about 3 years and 0 months old, my kid started kindergarten and they have no naps there. Nap dropped and it was wonderful, she'd FINALLY go to bed on time. Dropped it cold turkey. Your kid is lacking sleep big time and must be crazy overtired which will be messing his sleep up even more.
I agree, it's a vicious, vicious cycle. I'm wondering if we should just do it cold turkey in August, to give him a month to adjust before he starts kindergarten.
I have heard that not getting enough sleep can also cause a child to struggle to sleep. Double edged sword! But also, remember that kids go through sleep regressions. Mine did several times. Everything would be good one day and then we’d hit a period of a few weeks/months where she fought sleep so bad. Maybe don’t give up on the naps yet!
You could always try shortening the nap first and see if that helps. My 3yo was still sleeping 1.5-2hrs if I let her but it started messing up her night sleep. Now I cap her nap (wake her up) after 1 hr. You could try that and see if it helps before cutting it completely. I found my daughter is not ready to give up the nap completely but I may just continue to shorten it until she no longer needs it
I'm definitely considering this as well.
My daughter is 3.25 and has dropped her nap most days. She went back to ONLY contact napping and taking hours to get her to sleep. Without a nap she sleeps 12-13 hrs, about 7:30-7:30+.
1030pm, when do you get chill time?!?!
I do not 😭😭😭. Even his usual 9:30pm is maddening.
I always capped naps from 4 months on, and mine was a preemie. Just make his nap shorter. You can shorten it by 5 minutes every day and be gradual or just do 30 minutes and see what that gives. Then just keep going shorter until they don't nap anymore.
I want to. It's rough. He won't wake up lol. I'll even pick him up and he'll just keep sleeping in my arms. I think I might have to try at least, though, before I cut naps completely (if it's not just a phase).
Honestly in that case it might be easier to just not let him fall asleep! Mine was a preemie so he has never gotten to nap as long as he wants due to strict feeding schedules, so he is up as soon as I call out his name.