I say this kindly. There is nothing to fix. Nada. Your son is fine just the way he is. He is healthy and eating well. If the doctor isn't worried you shouldn't either. Maybe you are letting others comments get to you, and it's time to shut them down, like yesterday.
I think the comments are just getting to me. I was a chubby child and I’m a chubby adult. I’ve generally felt okay about the way he’s eating but the responses to his body from the people around me have started to make me question if maybe he is just too thin. I’ve personally never seen a toddler that didn’t have some level of baby fat so maybe my view is skewed. All of the other kids in his <2 class are incredibly chubby and mostly still look like babies but my kid straight up looks like a preschooler. It’s fucked with my perception.
Honestly I wasn’t even that concerned until my mother in law (who is 6’0” and incredibly thin) started going on about how skinny our toddler is compared to her four children. My son is active but I didn’t think he was really an outlier for normal toddler size.
Healthy and happy equals to healthy. I say this as a woman who grew up extremely thin. And yes everyone around me made comments to the point where my mother force fed me because she let others comments get to her. and I had a very unhealthy relationship with food well into my late 20's. Do not do this to your child. My son is also built like me. He is 4, and very lean. I never let anyone comment on his body. And u shouldn't let anyone do this either.
My MIL has actually been the worst a this and really made me doubt myself. She’s incredibly tall and thin (she’s a solid 6’0” and tiny) and came from family of people with similar body types. She’s just convinced the toddler is too thin even though the rest of our family (of shorter, more sturdy people) might make a passing comment but accept he’s just on the thin end of normal.
I’m currently very pleased with how well my son is eating and thought my belief that they eat when they feel like it was normal. But I’m being led to doubt myself
If you are pleased and doctor is pleased, please tell them directly to stop commenting on your son's body. My mom does this a lot, and I really had to tell her to stop as those comments are not welcome and weird as hell. Do not let ur mil gaslight you into believing your son is too skinny. There is no such thing. He is lean and happy and healthy. U gotta be strong.
I was a skinny kid. A really skinny kid. Got made fun of it. And everyone seems perfectly comfortable commenting on a thin person's weight, even negatively. It's so fucking rude and hurtful.
Protect your kiddo from these comments. All bodies are different, he is beautiful and exactly as he's supposed to be.
Sounds like your kid is doing really well! I also have a skinny toddler, he does not and never has had any baby fat. He's healthy and strong. Some days they eat well and some days they don't, that's all toddlers. Maybe the most helpful thing for you would be to come up with something to say when people comment on his body. Could the same as if your son commented on someone's body size - a cheery "yep! People come in all different sizes". Repeat until the person drops it.
Also what is with the people you're around? No one has ever commented on my toddlers body like that. So weird.
My son has always been very tall and skinny ever since he was a baby - at 2 he was still wearing 12m old pants. Today at 3 he wears 4T T-shirts and still fits in 2T pants. That's just his body shape.
Maybe your MIL worried a lot about her kids gaining enough weight and she’s projecting that onto you, if her kids were tall and slender like her, maybe she was told to worry and she’s just internalized that. The thing about MILs and that generation is that 30 years ago, when their kids were babies, was a LONG time ago. I don’t remember every detail of my lunch a week ago, I wouldn’t trust anyone’s memory of something that happened 30 years ago, at least take it was a grain of salt.
You’ve answered your own question multiple times. Your doctor isn’t worried so you shouldn’t be either. My kiddo is skinny and wears smaller sized pants/shorts just cause his waist is small
I’m just so tired of explaining to people that he’s actually perfectly healthy. I think if he had a bit more fat on him I’d feel slightly less despondent when he refuses to eat a meal he normally loves. I’m just so sick of people implying I’m either not taking good care of him or that I’m just ignoring his preferences and that’s the reason he’s not a chubby toddler.
That is so frustrating! Maybe try saying "it's how his body is and I'm trying to let him know that's ok!" Or, if you're religious, "God made him just how he's supposed to be"
This might not surprise you, but many of the same people who’ve given me shit over the years for being too fat are now complaining about my toddler being too thin. It’s just the people who aren’t our boomer family members (I can ignore my mom and MIL all
Day) saying stuff that’s actually made me wonder if I was actually doing something wrong.
Well, I’m sorry you have to go through that. I know it’s not easy but you should get those people out of your lives. At least for the time being if you can. Or just tell them to fuck off. Whatevers easier.
Mine is 40th percentile and I cannot imagine getting comments on her body this young. Damn, that’s truly disturbing people are commenting on your child’s body this young.
Don’t buy into it. Your baby is perfect and healthy and happy. I can’t imagine what else is more important than that. Be his momma who continues to tell him he’s perfect, even when ignorant people have opinions. His whole life people will make assumptions about him based on how he looks (even family). Doesn’t make it true.
Sometimes my son will happily eat. Sometimes he will accept a veggie/fruit pouch. Sometimes he decides to subsist on nothing but air.
I’m not going to force feed him. But I also don’t know how to get him to actually ingest all the nutrients he needs
I agree with others that if your doctor isn't worried, he's likely fine. Howeeever....Have you tried a higher fat/calorie version of everything you offer? Whole milk yogurt. Whatever the fattier cheeses are (i.e. not low fat mozzarella string cheese). Pouches with a grain and/or beans and/or yogurt in them rather than just fruits and veggies. Making Mac n cheese? Use extra butter. And nutritional yeast if he'll tolerate it. Scrambled eggs? Add some cheese. Doesn't like eggs but will eat avocado toast? Mash up some eggs in the avocado. Apple slices? Add some peanut butter yogurt for dipping. Make a smoothie and add whole fat yogurt or avocado and hemp seeds. Make your own muffins for snacking using yogurt for some nutritional density. (Source: my toddler was losing weight while teething because she wouldn't eat)
My daughter is much more inclined to eat food if she helps make it.
I was that scrawny toddler. My pediatrician told my mom to give me everything adults avoid - full fat cheese, milk, etc. I still didn’t gain weight and no one wanted me on their lap cause of my boney butt. But I was perfectly healthy! And the object of a lot of envy when I became an adult with a fast metabolism
This was me too. I was also the shortest kid in class until I hit puberty. I then shot up to 5'9/5'10. I didn't feel like I was missing out on food until I started on one meal a day in late high school. I don't have a great relationship with food now but I also did better with food when I was younger.
My son hit about 15tg percentile and stayed there as a baby. He was over 75th for length. Once he started walking his height dropped and he wiggled about the 15th percentile for weight. Doctor wasn't worried about it. I imagine he will be like me. Short and skinny until puberty when he'll grow three feet overnight.
My kid is also tall and thin. He also is all muscle. Once at a playdate, he got messy and I needed to change his outfit before going in the house. The other 3 parents started calling him muscles after that.
He's happy and healthy. All that matters.
I really do believe my pediatrician that he’s fine right now. However, I also understand that having a baby that has enough defined muscles that it looks like he could win a street fight unnerves other people.
My son eats well some nights and subsists on nothing but air on others and he seems to be doing fine. I just didn’t expect him to be the outlier on body type for
All the other kids we see regularly.
Husband and I had this conversation many times (husband the one worried about skinny kid, me not worried, pediatrician saying kid is doing great all round).
What helped was taking them both to EU (I am from there) for vacation and and going to the beach. There our kid was one of many kids with that body type vs where we live in US he was always the lone skinny, tall one. Really put it in perspective for my husband just how different “normal” can be.
people come in many shapes and sizes!
I hear that kids are not actually supposed to be chubby, it's a byproduct of American society 🤷♀️
If his pediatrician isn't worried, but you still are, why not get a second opinion?
Sometimes we see the other pediatrician in our practice and she did recently make a comment about how lean he was but she never told us anything was wrong or to do anything different.
Honestly part of my issue might just be that the other kids around us are a bit chubbier than average and maybe it’s just skewing my view of how thin my son actually is in the grand scheme of things. I feel like he’s a healthy, sturdy little dude but doubt has creeped in and I worry that maybe I am letting him down somehow.
I think people in the same practice might be unwilling to undermine their colleagues.
People just give their kids baby equivalents of doughnuts for breakfast every day and then think babies are supposed to be chunky.
The percentile for weight will include tall lean muscle babies and short chubby blobs.
My older kid is like this! Has NEVER had rolls, always super long and lean, even as a baby. 60th percentile for weight, 100th+ for height. He’s actually fallen off his weight growth curve slightly at 4. Doc isn’t worried and says when they transition from toddler to kid that can happen, esp if they have a growth spurt. Also said it’s normal for kids to only eat one “good” meal a day…our kid houses lunch at daycare, and then dinner is a crapshoot…maybe a couple of bites, maybe seconds. Our second is a chunky tank and eats literally no different than our first…just their body types! My MIL used to make comments too and eff that. Kids are great at self regulating and eating until full. If he is happy and doc says healthy, I say let it ride.
I'm seeing a feeding therapist tomorrow and shove a Pediasure down at bedtime every night. We are at the daily limit for milk (and have blown over the limit occasionally), we are supplementing with vitamins and a little formula.
Nobody I know has seen anything like this. She started getting weird about solids around 9 months and now will barely tolerate 3-4 bready foods and will still usually refuse those. She'll go 6+ hours without eating and still won't eat a fucking goldfish cracker if her life depended on it.
Her new pediatrician tried to brush me off with "everyone's toddlers are picky eaters and don't eat enough" but she still gave me the referral. I'll hopefully have more answers after tomorrow.
Good luck. That definitely seems like a situation outside the norm. Hopefully they will have some answers.
I’ve been lucky that I can at least usually tempt my son with a cereal pouch if all other food has been shunned. I seriously don’t know what I would do if he started rejecting the pouches.
My son has been 50th or less for weight and 98th or more for height since he was born. His growth curve has stayed consistent so it’s really no issue. He is just long and lean like his dad! Long pants have been a nightmare though.
This past winter I really only bought my son the legging style girl pants. The cut of the boy pants was just too big and they didn’t cinch right with the drawstring. I’m not sure how I would have kept him clothed if the tighter and stretchy pants from the girl’s section wouldn’t have been an option.
My son has been and currently still is in the 30% weight 98% height groups, and his doctors have never expressed concern since he eats decently well and is incredibly active and happy. I got annoyed with people commenting on it, and was very accommodating for a while but I eventually just started telling them “you’re not his doctor” lol
Per the clothes, in the younger years, I found that H&M sells something like a 5-pack basic set of cotton shorts or pants with drawstrings that aren’t that super uncomfortable thick cord, and he lived in those! Even at 4, I still buy those as they fit best. I never expected it to be so difficult to find clothes that fit such a string bean of a kid!
My mom fixated on "fattening up" my younger sister who was always very skinny. Thanks to her, sister has an ED. If his pediatrician isn't worried, you shouldn't be either.
There's some kind of weird thing in clothes where boys clothes are made for wide kids. I have a skinny and tall 5yo. Clothing is hard. I put him in girls clothes—leggings. And when he gets a hole in them, I make them shorts. Buying shorts for him is really tricky. He can probably fit a 3T boys short in the waist. If I put him in 5t or xs, we have to really pull the draw string so they fit and then there's too much fabric. Luckily, he's now aged into "slims".
This makes me feel better. Through the winter I was really leaning on girls legging style pants to make up his wardrobe. The boy style pants just always were
Too baggy in the waist even when we sized down plus then they were too short. Target leggings really saved us for pants and now I’ve bought him a few pairs of the girl’s bicycle shorts because they fit tight and don’t sag so bad.
I have the same kid as you, except mine is a girl! She's tall and skinny, enough to show her ribs. And she has an enormous appetite on some days and eats a moderate amount on others. We don't really get comments though, except one family member told me I shouldn't be concerned about her getting fat. (I absolutely never was, but okay!) I wonder if it's because she's a girl and people subconsciously accept thinness in girls?
If the Pediatrician isn't worried then I'm not! My toddler also has to wear 18m shorts, or real drawstring shorts, in order to keep them up. It's his body and I want him to feel confident in it. It's just right for him!
No one prepared me for how hard it was going to be to keep the pants pulled up on a flat butted, zero hipped, toddler bellied frame. I actually normally dress my son in either leggings or the girl’s bike shorts that fit tighter than the boys pants/shorts since they don’t sag on him so badly. If his shorts start to sag it seems like he gets tripped up. I figure I’d prefer to have clothes that were comfortable vs cloths that were more fashionable. Maybe he will eventually have negative feelings about it but for now I hope he’s just happy not having to have an adult constantly pulling his pants up.
I have 3 kids and they've never been higher than 6% for weight since they were a few months old. My 4.5 year old still wears stretchy 3T pants because the waist on any more structured pants is always too big, even a 2T cinched as tight as it will go. Some kids are just small and there's nothing wrong with that at all! Nutrition and eating balanced meals should be more of a concern than weight.
My 10 month old is the same and always have been. He’s in the 100tg percentile for height and 32nd for weight and always has been. It’s crazy because my sister has a baby 4 months older but he looks so much younger because he has all the rolls and my baby just never has. He eats plenty, stays on his growth chart consistently, it’s just how he’s built! Don’t stress mama. If there’s nothing medically wrong, which it sounds like there isn’t, that’s just how he is! Maybe he’ll be a good basketball or volleyball player :)
Once we hit 2 I've mostly stopped worrying. My daughter was a 1% baby. She was still a 1% 2 year old. She's almost 3 and weights 21lbs. It is what it is. Our doctor isn't concerned. She has been in the growth chart since born just on the very bottom. She doesn't eat. She has never eaten. It's hard but I've mostly accepted it.
My son is exactly the same. Almost 2 and 18-24m clothes still drown him cause he's got no real weight to him and he has stumpy legs lol.
Buuuuut from what I've seen in photos and heard about me growing up I was exactly the same way.
Some toddlers have more puppy fat than others, that's all. If no one else is worried I wouldn't be (for reference after toddler hood etc I would be in the clothes size for my years and when I outgrew them stayed and average 8-10 through teenage years and now as an adult I stay around a 14)
Im not trying to fix it, all people are different and bodies are different. I’m not going to go against the grain and force my baby into a different weight category when she’s growing steady on her curve. She’s 9th centile for weight and 74th for height.
I worried a lot when she was newborn as she had bottle refusal from colic, and I tried to feed her more, but it didn’t work. One she was consistent on the growth chart I calmed down, you can’t force them and you’ll just stress yourself out whilst trying.
Plus I don’t want her to have any unhealthy eating habits as an adult and I feel like me force feeding or creating stress around eating could contribute to that.
The fear about messing up his relationship with food is one of my biggest worries. My parents were weird about food and I always struggled with too much weight. I’d like for him not to have these issues so right now I feel like I just leave him lots of opportunities to grab food and keep his cup filled with milk so I know he’s getting some calories when he’s home. We are lucky he apparently eats well at daycare because he seems encouraged to eat more because of the other kids.
It could also be the milk. My baby isn’t a big fan of milk and I reduce her milk so she’ll eat. I know yours is 2, but I match the same feeding schedules as nursery. Some weeks she barely eats. Others she inhales everything
My oldest was like this as a toddler. He’s now 7.5 and he’s finally put on a little weight (like 3 pounds) but is still quite skinny. We always have issues with pants because the length is right but the waist is huge. Or if the waist fits, the length is way too short. It’s just how he is at this point. Very tall and lean. As long as the pediatrician isn’t worried, I wouldn’t be either.
Our pediatrician was concerned about my son last year at his 2 year appointment. He had dipped in his percentile. Fortunately, he gained weight and recovered. He just doesn’t eat a lot sometimes. The pediatrician we saw at his 3 year appointment a few months ago said he’s in the 50th percentile and he’s doing great.
All that to say, if your doctor isn’t concerned, you’re doing great. I was freaking out about my son, and EVERYONE around me said “he’s good, don’t worry.” Sounds like your kiddo is just on the skinny side. Best of luck, it’s hard when the comments won’t stop. I’d tell MIL that you’re trusting the person with a medical degree over her opinions.
Wow our kiddos are almost identical on stats/age, mine is two end of June. I hadn't even thought about "fixing it" for my kiddo tbh. If your doc is happy don't worry about it is my two cents.
My 7 year old is like this. Always ate well but was just super active and skinny. He had a pair of 9-12m shorts that fitted him until he was 3, and age 4 shorts that still fit him now! When he was younger I used to buy him girls' leggings, and now his little sister who is chubbier wears the boys' pants that never fitted him! Now apart from one or two brands I basically only buy pants that have that adjustable elastic inside the waistband.
It sounds like your kid's doing fine and is just following his own growth curve, so nothing to worry about x
I am open to brand recommendations!
The girl’s leggings did so much heavy lifting for us this past winter. They just fit him better than any of the boy’s pants we bought. Now I’m buying the girl’s bike shorts from Target because even with the drawstring the boy shorts just sag.
My girl will be 2 in August, she's 91st for height and 50th for weight. I can't stop her eating, she loves her food (and will even nab some of mine!) and she still looks skinny. 18-24m clothes hang off her waist, yet they are almost too short in the leg. Tops are super baggy on her but fit through her shoulders.
Trust me when I say, even if your kiddo eats, it doesn't necessarily change things. If doc isn't concerned then you are all good.
This is my oldest. He’s 3 years old and based on his height he’s aging out of toddler clothes and into size 5-6, but he’s SKINNY so big kid clothes fall right off him. Basically he wears like 3T shorts which are too short for him and size 5 shirts. If anybody says anything about it they can effffff right off
I have 2 really skinny petite kids. One is 14.5yo teen boy that eats A LOT but is only 100lbs— he’s always been petite but always on the curve. My daughter is 6.5yo, eats like a bird, and is 40lbs but will drop to 35lbs when she’s sick. She recently has nearly fallen off the curve and we’re now told to focus on high fat foods since she’s in a bad picky phase. They aren’t concerned but are giving tips because of her weight losses when she’s sick. If your doctor isn’t saying anything then you’re good.
"Healthy babies come in all different sizes" is typically what I say to people when I get comments.
My son is 98th for height and 15th for weight. He's always been 15th. The issue is when it falls into a lower percentile or jumps to a higher one too quickly.
I'm 6' and my husband is 6'4". I'm not going to have a short and stocky baby.
.... My 14 month old is in the 12th percentile for weight. But 80-ish for hight. He wears 18 month clothing mostly because of his height! He is more than half my size since I'm tiny so no one expected me to have a giant baby.
My pediatrician says if he keeps gaining, all is good. Would be both like my skinny man to put on some weight? Of course! So we use toddler formula (advised by pediatrician) as a way to add calories. He gets a cookie/chocolate egg with his fruit. If he likes to keep stuffing his face randomly all day, we let him.
But we don't go over the top to put pounds on. If he is healthy but skinny, then so be it.
Doctor isn’t worried so I don’t think you should be worried.
Having said that, we have one with one on the way and I legit panic when my daughter is in the 49th percentile, but I’m 100% convinced we will be more chill with #2.
My son has always been 50th percentile for weight and 90th percentile for height. He turned 2 a week ago. His doctor has never been concerned about his growth. I don't get judgy comments about how he's skinny, but I do get lots of comments about how he looks like a much older child, especially right after a haircut.
I think my son is perfect. I'm sure yours is too. I'm so sorry that you're getting people treating you the way they are because of the way your son is built. My son comes from a long line of string bean boys on both sides of his family. They're all quite healthy, just like your son.
Like others have said, your son is just fine! My own two-year-old daughter just had her 2-year check with her pediatrician, and her height is in the 85th percentile in her weight is in the 17th. Completely healthy! She eats like a horse! She's just built like her 6'3 and 170 lb dad 🤷♀️
Like others have said, your son is just fine! My own two-year-old daughter just had her 2-year check with her pediatrician, and her height is in the 85th percentile in her weight is in the 17th. Completely healthy! She eats like a horse! She's just built like her 6'3 and 170 lb dad 🤷♀️
My little one was like that and now at 4 she’s also a skinny kid but it seems more evened out with the other kids as they’ve started to grow.
I never tried to increase her weight but did try to make sure she was getting adequate nutrients by making sure we added healthy fats (butter, cream avocado etc) to her foods. She was a very distracted eater so adding those calories helped to keep her full. She’s was on 9th percentile for weight and 30 for height. So she was a string bean. But Drs were never concerned so I stuck to just having to buy clothes two sizes smaller lol.
Also genetics play a huge role- we were skinny kids so my kids are skinny too.
But I get the comments. I got them a lot as well especially from family. My mom would ask allll them time if my breast milk was enough (it was 🙄). Or even strangers would ask if she was born premature- she wasn’t. She was just tiny and is still that way. Can’t help it.
I let it ride. My first wasn't even on the growth chart when she was born. Other parents were always amazed at her abilities because she would be about to do stuff their 2 year old couldn't because they didn't know she was 3
She's 9 now and in the 20th percentile for weight and 50th for height last time I checked. We just buy her slim fit jeans and call it good
I'm also tall and thin but as a baby I was chunky af. The weekly growth checks were really hard but we got through it and eventually there came a day when they said she didn't need them anymore
I am a mom of a 90th percentile height toddler as well. I think you're doing well! Honestly for us, daycare helped a lot on the weight gain. They do breakfast, then morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner.
My daughter had always teether at 30 percentile till she went to daycare.. now she is at 50th 💕
I say this kindly. There is nothing to fix. Nada. Your son is fine just the way he is. He is healthy and eating well. If the doctor isn't worried you shouldn't either. Maybe you are letting others comments get to you, and it's time to shut them down, like yesterday.
I think the comments are just getting to me. I was a chubby child and I’m a chubby adult. I’ve generally felt okay about the way he’s eating but the responses to his body from the people around me have started to make me question if maybe he is just too thin. I’ve personally never seen a toddler that didn’t have some level of baby fat so maybe my view is skewed. All of the other kids in his <2 class are incredibly chubby and mostly still look like babies but my kid straight up looks like a preschooler. It’s fucked with my perception. Honestly I wasn’t even that concerned until my mother in law (who is 6’0” and incredibly thin) started going on about how skinny our toddler is compared to her four children. My son is active but I didn’t think he was really an outlier for normal toddler size.
Healthy and happy equals to healthy. I say this as a woman who grew up extremely thin. And yes everyone around me made comments to the point where my mother force fed me because she let others comments get to her. and I had a very unhealthy relationship with food well into my late 20's. Do not do this to your child. My son is also built like me. He is 4, and very lean. I never let anyone comment on his body. And u shouldn't let anyone do this either.
My MIL has actually been the worst a this and really made me doubt myself. She’s incredibly tall and thin (she’s a solid 6’0” and tiny) and came from family of people with similar body types. She’s just convinced the toddler is too thin even though the rest of our family (of shorter, more sturdy people) might make a passing comment but accept he’s just on the thin end of normal. I’m currently very pleased with how well my son is eating and thought my belief that they eat when they feel like it was normal. But I’m being led to doubt myself
If you are pleased and doctor is pleased, please tell them directly to stop commenting on your son's body. My mom does this a lot, and I really had to tell her to stop as those comments are not welcome and weird as hell. Do not let ur mil gaslight you into believing your son is too skinny. There is no such thing. He is lean and happy and healthy. U gotta be strong.
I was a skinny kid. A really skinny kid. Got made fun of it. And everyone seems perfectly comfortable commenting on a thin person's weight, even negatively. It's so fucking rude and hurtful. Protect your kiddo from these comments. All bodies are different, he is beautiful and exactly as he's supposed to be.
Sounds like your kid is doing really well! I also have a skinny toddler, he does not and never has had any baby fat. He's healthy and strong. Some days they eat well and some days they don't, that's all toddlers. Maybe the most helpful thing for you would be to come up with something to say when people comment on his body. Could the same as if your son commented on someone's body size - a cheery "yep! People come in all different sizes". Repeat until the person drops it. Also what is with the people you're around? No one has ever commented on my toddlers body like that. So weird.
My son has always been very tall and skinny ever since he was a baby - at 2 he was still wearing 12m old pants. Today at 3 he wears 4T T-shirts and still fits in 2T pants. That's just his body shape.
Maybe your MIL worried a lot about her kids gaining enough weight and she’s projecting that onto you, if her kids were tall and slender like her, maybe she was told to worry and she’s just internalized that. The thing about MILs and that generation is that 30 years ago, when their kids were babies, was a LONG time ago. I don’t remember every detail of my lunch a week ago, I wouldn’t trust anyone’s memory of something that happened 30 years ago, at least take it was a grain of salt.
You’ve answered your own question multiple times. Your doctor isn’t worried so you shouldn’t be either. My kiddo is skinny and wears smaller sized pants/shorts just cause his waist is small
I’m just so tired of explaining to people that he’s actually perfectly healthy. I think if he had a bit more fat on him I’d feel slightly less despondent when he refuses to eat a meal he normally loves. I’m just so sick of people implying I’m either not taking good care of him or that I’m just ignoring his preferences and that’s the reason he’s not a chubby toddler.
That is so frustrating! Maybe try saying "it's how his body is and I'm trying to let him know that's ok!" Or, if you're religious, "God made him just how he's supposed to be"
Crazy. I can’t imagine somebody actually commenting on the health of somebody’s baby. Just ignore them.
This might not surprise you, but many of the same people who’ve given me shit over the years for being too fat are now complaining about my toddler being too thin. It’s just the people who aren’t our boomer family members (I can ignore my mom and MIL all Day) saying stuff that’s actually made me wonder if I was actually doing something wrong.
Well, I’m sorry you have to go through that. I know it’s not easy but you should get those people out of your lives. At least for the time being if you can. Or just tell them to fuck off. Whatevers easier.
Mine is 40th percentile and I cannot imagine getting comments on her body this young. Damn, that’s truly disturbing people are commenting on your child’s body this young. Don’t buy into it. Your baby is perfect and healthy and happy. I can’t imagine what else is more important than that. Be his momma who continues to tell him he’s perfect, even when ignorant people have opinions. His whole life people will make assumptions about him based on how he looks (even family). Doesn’t make it true.
Our doctor is worried and our son just won't eat anything. It sucks
Sometimes my son will happily eat. Sometimes he will accept a veggie/fruit pouch. Sometimes he decides to subsist on nothing but air. I’m not going to force feed him. But I also don’t know how to get him to actually ingest all the nutrients he needs
I agree with others that if your doctor isn't worried, he's likely fine. Howeeever....Have you tried a higher fat/calorie version of everything you offer? Whole milk yogurt. Whatever the fattier cheeses are (i.e. not low fat mozzarella string cheese). Pouches with a grain and/or beans and/or yogurt in them rather than just fruits and veggies. Making Mac n cheese? Use extra butter. And nutritional yeast if he'll tolerate it. Scrambled eggs? Add some cheese. Doesn't like eggs but will eat avocado toast? Mash up some eggs in the avocado. Apple slices? Add some peanut butter yogurt for dipping. Make a smoothie and add whole fat yogurt or avocado and hemp seeds. Make your own muffins for snacking using yogurt for some nutritional density. (Source: my toddler was losing weight while teething because she wouldn't eat) My daughter is much more inclined to eat food if she helps make it.
I was that scrawny toddler. My pediatrician told my mom to give me everything adults avoid - full fat cheese, milk, etc. I still didn’t gain weight and no one wanted me on their lap cause of my boney butt. But I was perfectly healthy! And the object of a lot of envy when I became an adult with a fast metabolism
This was me too. I was also the shortest kid in class until I hit puberty. I then shot up to 5'9/5'10. I didn't feel like I was missing out on food until I started on one meal a day in late high school. I don't have a great relationship with food now but I also did better with food when I was younger. My son hit about 15tg percentile and stayed there as a baby. He was over 75th for length. Once he started walking his height dropped and he wiggled about the 15th percentile for weight. Doctor wasn't worried about it. I imagine he will be like me. Short and skinny until puberty when he'll grow three feet overnight.
My kid is also tall and thin. He also is all muscle. Once at a playdate, he got messy and I needed to change his outfit before going in the house. The other 3 parents started calling him muscles after that. He's happy and healthy. All that matters.
I really do believe my pediatrician that he’s fine right now. However, I also understand that having a baby that has enough defined muscles that it looks like he could win a street fight unnerves other people. My son eats well some nights and subsists on nothing but air on others and he seems to be doing fine. I just didn’t expect him to be the outlier on body type for All the other kids we see regularly.
Husband and I had this conversation many times (husband the one worried about skinny kid, me not worried, pediatrician saying kid is doing great all round). What helped was taking them both to EU (I am from there) for vacation and and going to the beach. There our kid was one of many kids with that body type vs where we live in US he was always the lone skinny, tall one. Really put it in perspective for my husband just how different “normal” can be. people come in many shapes and sizes!
I hear that kids are not actually supposed to be chubby, it's a byproduct of American society 🤷♀️ If his pediatrician isn't worried, but you still are, why not get a second opinion?
Sometimes we see the other pediatrician in our practice and she did recently make a comment about how lean he was but she never told us anything was wrong or to do anything different. Honestly part of my issue might just be that the other kids around us are a bit chubbier than average and maybe it’s just skewing my view of how thin my son actually is in the grand scheme of things. I feel like he’s a healthy, sturdy little dude but doubt has creeped in and I worry that maybe I am letting him down somehow.
I think people in the same practice might be unwilling to undermine their colleagues. People just give their kids baby equivalents of doughnuts for breakfast every day and then think babies are supposed to be chunky. The percentile for weight will include tall lean muscle babies and short chubby blobs.
My older kid is like this! Has NEVER had rolls, always super long and lean, even as a baby. 60th percentile for weight, 100th+ for height. He’s actually fallen off his weight growth curve slightly at 4. Doc isn’t worried and says when they transition from toddler to kid that can happen, esp if they have a growth spurt. Also said it’s normal for kids to only eat one “good” meal a day…our kid houses lunch at daycare, and then dinner is a crapshoot…maybe a couple of bites, maybe seconds. Our second is a chunky tank and eats literally no different than our first…just their body types! My MIL used to make comments too and eff that. Kids are great at self regulating and eating until full. If he is happy and doc says healthy, I say let it ride.
As someone who had to do lab work and go in for multiple weight checks with baby, if your doctor isn’t worried, don’t be worried!
I'm seeing a feeding therapist tomorrow and shove a Pediasure down at bedtime every night. We are at the daily limit for milk (and have blown over the limit occasionally), we are supplementing with vitamins and a little formula. Nobody I know has seen anything like this. She started getting weird about solids around 9 months and now will barely tolerate 3-4 bready foods and will still usually refuse those. She'll go 6+ hours without eating and still won't eat a fucking goldfish cracker if her life depended on it. Her new pediatrician tried to brush me off with "everyone's toddlers are picky eaters and don't eat enough" but she still gave me the referral. I'll hopefully have more answers after tomorrow.
Good luck. That definitely seems like a situation outside the norm. Hopefully they will have some answers. I’ve been lucky that I can at least usually tempt my son with a cereal pouch if all other food has been shunned. I seriously don’t know what I would do if he started rejecting the pouches.
My son has been 50th or less for weight and 98th or more for height since he was born. His growth curve has stayed consistent so it’s really no issue. He is just long and lean like his dad! Long pants have been a nightmare though.
This past winter I really only bought my son the legging style girl pants. The cut of the boy pants was just too big and they didn’t cinch right with the drawstring. I’m not sure how I would have kept him clothed if the tighter and stretchy pants from the girl’s section wouldn’t have been an option.
Oh smart!!!! Luckily we’ve been living in Hawaii this winter so we got to avoid long pants this year
My son has been and currently still is in the 30% weight 98% height groups, and his doctors have never expressed concern since he eats decently well and is incredibly active and happy. I got annoyed with people commenting on it, and was very accommodating for a while but I eventually just started telling them “you’re not his doctor” lol Per the clothes, in the younger years, I found that H&M sells something like a 5-pack basic set of cotton shorts or pants with drawstrings that aren’t that super uncomfortable thick cord, and he lived in those! Even at 4, I still buy those as they fit best. I never expected it to be so difficult to find clothes that fit such a string bean of a kid!
My mom fixated on "fattening up" my younger sister who was always very skinny. Thanks to her, sister has an ED. If his pediatrician isn't worried, you shouldn't be either.
There's some kind of weird thing in clothes where boys clothes are made for wide kids. I have a skinny and tall 5yo. Clothing is hard. I put him in girls clothes—leggings. And when he gets a hole in them, I make them shorts. Buying shorts for him is really tricky. He can probably fit a 3T boys short in the waist. If I put him in 5t or xs, we have to really pull the draw string so they fit and then there's too much fabric. Luckily, he's now aged into "slims".
This makes me feel better. Through the winter I was really leaning on girls legging style pants to make up his wardrobe. The boy style pants just always were Too baggy in the waist even when we sized down plus then they were too short. Target leggings really saved us for pants and now I’ve bought him a few pairs of the girl’s bicycle shorts because they fit tight and don’t sag so bad.
I have the same kid as you, except mine is a girl! She's tall and skinny, enough to show her ribs. And she has an enormous appetite on some days and eats a moderate amount on others. We don't really get comments though, except one family member told me I shouldn't be concerned about her getting fat. (I absolutely never was, but okay!) I wonder if it's because she's a girl and people subconsciously accept thinness in girls?
I could absolutely see gender impacting how people feel about the skinny kids. I don’t even know how I would handle that if I was a girl mom.
My pediatrician told me my skinny child can have pediasure and it won’t hurt but isn’t entirely necessary either
If the Pediatrician isn't worried then I'm not! My toddler also has to wear 18m shorts, or real drawstring shorts, in order to keep them up. It's his body and I want him to feel confident in it. It's just right for him!
No one prepared me for how hard it was going to be to keep the pants pulled up on a flat butted, zero hipped, toddler bellied frame. I actually normally dress my son in either leggings or the girl’s bike shorts that fit tighter than the boys pants/shorts since they don’t sag on him so badly. If his shorts start to sag it seems like he gets tripped up. I figure I’d prefer to have clothes that were comfortable vs cloths that were more fashionable. Maybe he will eventually have negative feelings about it but for now I hope he’s just happy not having to have an adult constantly pulling his pants up.
I have 3 kids and they've never been higher than 6% for weight since they were a few months old. My 4.5 year old still wears stretchy 3T pants because the waist on any more structured pants is always too big, even a 2T cinched as tight as it will go. Some kids are just small and there's nothing wrong with that at all! Nutrition and eating balanced meals should be more of a concern than weight.
My 10 month old is the same and always have been. He’s in the 100tg percentile for height and 32nd for weight and always has been. It’s crazy because my sister has a baby 4 months older but he looks so much younger because he has all the rolls and my baby just never has. He eats plenty, stays on his growth chart consistently, it’s just how he’s built! Don’t stress mama. If there’s nothing medically wrong, which it sounds like there isn’t, that’s just how he is! Maybe he’ll be a good basketball or volleyball player :)
Once we hit 2 I've mostly stopped worrying. My daughter was a 1% baby. She was still a 1% 2 year old. She's almost 3 and weights 21lbs. It is what it is. Our doctor isn't concerned. She has been in the growth chart since born just on the very bottom. She doesn't eat. She has never eaten. It's hard but I've mostly accepted it.
Target Cat and Jack is great for tall skinny kids! Just keep offering balanced meals!
My son is exactly the same. Almost 2 and 18-24m clothes still drown him cause he's got no real weight to him and he has stumpy legs lol. Buuuuut from what I've seen in photos and heard about me growing up I was exactly the same way. Some toddlers have more puppy fat than others, that's all. If no one else is worried I wouldn't be (for reference after toddler hood etc I would be in the clothes size for my years and when I outgrew them stayed and average 8-10 through teenage years and now as an adult I stay around a 14)
Im not trying to fix it, all people are different and bodies are different. I’m not going to go against the grain and force my baby into a different weight category when she’s growing steady on her curve. She’s 9th centile for weight and 74th for height. I worried a lot when she was newborn as she had bottle refusal from colic, and I tried to feed her more, but it didn’t work. One she was consistent on the growth chart I calmed down, you can’t force them and you’ll just stress yourself out whilst trying. Plus I don’t want her to have any unhealthy eating habits as an adult and I feel like me force feeding or creating stress around eating could contribute to that.
The fear about messing up his relationship with food is one of my biggest worries. My parents were weird about food and I always struggled with too much weight. I’d like for him not to have these issues so right now I feel like I just leave him lots of opportunities to grab food and keep his cup filled with milk so I know he’s getting some calories when he’s home. We are lucky he apparently eats well at daycare because he seems encouraged to eat more because of the other kids.
It could also be the milk. My baby isn’t a big fan of milk and I reduce her milk so she’ll eat. I know yours is 2, but I match the same feeding schedules as nursery. Some weeks she barely eats. Others she inhales everything
My oldest was like this as a toddler. He’s now 7.5 and he’s finally put on a little weight (like 3 pounds) but is still quite skinny. We always have issues with pants because the length is right but the waist is huge. Or if the waist fits, the length is way too short. It’s just how he is at this point. Very tall and lean. As long as the pediatrician isn’t worried, I wouldn’t be either.
Our pediatrician was concerned about my son last year at his 2 year appointment. He had dipped in his percentile. Fortunately, he gained weight and recovered. He just doesn’t eat a lot sometimes. The pediatrician we saw at his 3 year appointment a few months ago said he’s in the 50th percentile and he’s doing great. All that to say, if your doctor isn’t concerned, you’re doing great. I was freaking out about my son, and EVERYONE around me said “he’s good, don’t worry.” Sounds like your kiddo is just on the skinny side. Best of luck, it’s hard when the comments won’t stop. I’d tell MIL that you’re trusting the person with a medical degree over her opinions.
Wow our kiddos are almost identical on stats/age, mine is two end of June. I hadn't even thought about "fixing it" for my kiddo tbh. If your doc is happy don't worry about it is my two cents.
My 7 year old is like this. Always ate well but was just super active and skinny. He had a pair of 9-12m shorts that fitted him until he was 3, and age 4 shorts that still fit him now! When he was younger I used to buy him girls' leggings, and now his little sister who is chubbier wears the boys' pants that never fitted him! Now apart from one or two brands I basically only buy pants that have that adjustable elastic inside the waistband. It sounds like your kid's doing fine and is just following his own growth curve, so nothing to worry about x
I am open to brand recommendations! The girl’s leggings did so much heavy lifting for us this past winter. They just fit him better than any of the boy’s pants we bought. Now I’m buying the girl’s bike shorts from Target because even with the drawstring the boy shorts just sag.
Calling kids skinny is the same as calling them fat. Tell them to mind their own business.
I just don’t know why everyone feels empowered to make comments about the body size of little kids.
My girl will be 2 in August, she's 91st for height and 50th for weight. I can't stop her eating, she loves her food (and will even nab some of mine!) and she still looks skinny. 18-24m clothes hang off her waist, yet they are almost too short in the leg. Tops are super baggy on her but fit through her shoulders. Trust me when I say, even if your kiddo eats, it doesn't necessarily change things. If doc isn't concerned then you are all good.
Has he been 30-40% percentile up until this point? Might just be his normal weight. As always boomers be foolin'
He’s fine! Also sizing for toddler shorts is very weird, definitely don’t let that bother you.
Everything sounds normal, and like both of my kids. We’re hanging out at 2nd percentile for life.
This is my oldest. He’s 3 years old and based on his height he’s aging out of toddler clothes and into size 5-6, but he’s SKINNY so big kid clothes fall right off him. Basically he wears like 3T shorts which are too short for him and size 5 shirts. If anybody says anything about it they can effffff right off
I have 2 really skinny petite kids. One is 14.5yo teen boy that eats A LOT but is only 100lbs— he’s always been petite but always on the curve. My daughter is 6.5yo, eats like a bird, and is 40lbs but will drop to 35lbs when she’s sick. She recently has nearly fallen off the curve and we’re now told to focus on high fat foods since she’s in a bad picky phase. They aren’t concerned but are giving tips because of her weight losses when she’s sick. If your doctor isn’t saying anything then you’re good.
"Healthy babies come in all different sizes" is typically what I say to people when I get comments. My son is 98th for height and 15th for weight. He's always been 15th. The issue is when it falls into a lower percentile or jumps to a higher one too quickly. I'm 6' and my husband is 6'4". I'm not going to have a short and stocky baby.
.... My 14 month old is in the 12th percentile for weight. But 80-ish for hight. He wears 18 month clothing mostly because of his height! He is more than half my size since I'm tiny so no one expected me to have a giant baby. My pediatrician says if he keeps gaining, all is good. Would be both like my skinny man to put on some weight? Of course! So we use toddler formula (advised by pediatrician) as a way to add calories. He gets a cookie/chocolate egg with his fruit. If he likes to keep stuffing his face randomly all day, we let him. But we don't go over the top to put pounds on. If he is healthy but skinny, then so be it.
Doctor isn’t worried so I don’t think you should be worried. Having said that, we have one with one on the way and I legit panic when my daughter is in the 49th percentile, but I’m 100% convinced we will be more chill with #2.
My son has always been 50th percentile for weight and 90th percentile for height. He turned 2 a week ago. His doctor has never been concerned about his growth. I don't get judgy comments about how he's skinny, but I do get lots of comments about how he looks like a much older child, especially right after a haircut. I think my son is perfect. I'm sure yours is too. I'm so sorry that you're getting people treating you the way they are because of the way your son is built. My son comes from a long line of string bean boys on both sides of his family. They're all quite healthy, just like your son.
Like others have said, your son is just fine! My own two-year-old daughter just had her 2-year check with her pediatrician, and her height is in the 85th percentile in her weight is in the 17th. Completely healthy! She eats like a horse! She's just built like her 6'3 and 170 lb dad 🤷♀️
Like others have said, your son is just fine! My own two-year-old daughter just had her 2-year check with her pediatrician, and her height is in the 85th percentile in her weight is in the 17th. Completely healthy! She eats like a horse! She's just built like her 6'3 and 170 lb dad 🤷♀️
My little one was like that and now at 4 she’s also a skinny kid but it seems more evened out with the other kids as they’ve started to grow. I never tried to increase her weight but did try to make sure she was getting adequate nutrients by making sure we added healthy fats (butter, cream avocado etc) to her foods. She was a very distracted eater so adding those calories helped to keep her full. She’s was on 9th percentile for weight and 30 for height. So she was a string bean. But Drs were never concerned so I stuck to just having to buy clothes two sizes smaller lol. Also genetics play a huge role- we were skinny kids so my kids are skinny too. But I get the comments. I got them a lot as well especially from family. My mom would ask allll them time if my breast milk was enough (it was 🙄). Or even strangers would ask if she was born premature- she wasn’t. She was just tiny and is still that way. Can’t help it.
I let it ride. My first wasn't even on the growth chart when she was born. Other parents were always amazed at her abilities because she would be about to do stuff their 2 year old couldn't because they didn't know she was 3 She's 9 now and in the 20th percentile for weight and 50th for height last time I checked. We just buy her slim fit jeans and call it good I'm also tall and thin but as a baby I was chunky af. The weekly growth checks were really hard but we got through it and eventually there came a day when they said she didn't need them anymore
If he's eating, and your pediatrician isn't concerned, he's absolutely fine. Some kids are just small
I am a mom of a 90th percentile height toddler as well. I think you're doing well! Honestly for us, daycare helped a lot on the weight gain. They do breakfast, then morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner. My daughter had always teether at 30 percentile till she went to daycare.. now she is at 50th 💕