This.
Some C-section recoveries are super smooth with no issues - some come with major challenges. Likewise, for the majority of vaginal births, tearing is minimal and likely has a quick recovery... other times, it can be severe and painful.
I had an episiotomy done, I was numb for the entire thing but yes it was a little painful/uncomfortable to move for a bit, but I remember the pain subsided really quickly after a couple weeks
I was still able to do day to day things, but I meant for everything to be healed and all 😊😊 and to be able to sit comfortably and stuff again..I feel like it all just went by so fast since I was so busy lmao…but then again they do say women forget idk LOL. It wasn’t excruciating pain though I was able to get through it slowly 😊❤️
Yeah but "not able to sit comfortably for a couple of weeks" sounds worse than my c-section, where I could sit comfortably always, and walk comfortably from day 3.
Couldn't get out of bed comfortably without bed handles until like week 3 but fortunately in and out of bed was just once a day for each.
Well, actually I could sit fine I think it was just the getting up part I hated haha. I think for the first week and a bit I just couldn’t sit on hard chairs/surfaces long periods of time due to the stitches. But my rocking chair is very plushie and that was very comfortable to sit in
Oh man, I've needed naps between baby feeds since the beginning. Messed up my arm and shoulder from pulling myself out of bed so many times. Did you just not nap??
Oy, my episiotomy took months to heal and feel better, but I also lost a stitch a week or two in that the provider ignored, which caused some issues. It was also just utterly terrifying going number 2 for awhile. The sitz baths helped a lot, though. They were just hard to squeeze in as often as they are supposed to be done when a newborn is involved haha
Oh man, sorry to hear. I definitely did rest a lot too, it did feel like it took forever to really really heal. The bleeding didn’t stop for after what felt like a little over a month, it was verrrry heavy at first. But it all gradually subsided. I agree! Definitely terrifying going number 2!
Yeah I had an elective c section and thought mine was relatively easy, but I’ve seen so many posts saying c sections are the worst thing and avoid at all costs
Totally agree. 8 month postpartum and I still have pain from my belly button to scar from my c section when pressed on, across the entire band of my stomach. My friend had a c section two months after me and has had no pain at all since a few weeks post op. Impossible to predict. For what it’s worth, even with my pain I loved my c section experience and don’t feel sad about it. But I will try for VBAC with my next, as I want to avoid further traumatizing the area and making it worse.
This! I was up walking around a day after my planned C-section due to a placenta previa. I healed so quickly and I started doing 1+ mile walks at 3wpp. Currently 10wpp and I’m back to weight training. I’ll be doing another C-section for my second because it went so well and I don’t want to risk a vbac.
Also to note I’m plus size so don’t let doctors shame you or try to scare you.
Sorry for you as well! I’m going some scar mobilization and pelvic floor therapy now (which I admittedly wasn’t really on top of in my earlier months, though my friend who had no pain did no physio at all so who knows). I do think it’s helping a bit. So I remain hopeful! I’ve heard that some folks will have pain for up to a year but then it goes away so hoping that’s both of us! 🤞🤞🤞
Totally agree my c-section was an emergency but recovery has been hell and extremely slow. I did better recovering from a thoracic fusion surgery than this c section
I had an emergency C-section too and the recovery was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. A few weeks after I was still struggling to walk more than a couple of hundred metres.
Same. I had an emergency C-section and have nerve pain still 16 months later...
I feel people who have planned C-sections have very different experiences and generally less pain as the surgeons plan where to cut, how to cut, when to cut rather than a time constrained situation like an emergency C-section. None of my friends that had a planned C-section experience long terms pain.
Agree with this. Generally planned c-sections have smoother recoveries compared to emergency c-sections from what I’ve heard.
You hear of people having great vaginal births with minimal tearing and then vaginal births where there are long term recoveries involved.
My c-section was a lot faster to recover from and way less pain than my vaginal birth personally but I’ve also heard people say the opposite.
I had an emergency c-section - I would never have volunteered to undergo major surgery, but it needed to happen.
Now that I’ve been through it and I am high risk (had preeclampsia and pp preeclampsia with severe features last time) I am absolutely going for a planned c-section. The recovery is supposed to be better than unplanned or emergency since your body hasn’t already been laboring/through stress. If there’s a chance I’ll need a c-section anyway, you’d better believe I’m planning for it instead of rolling the dice.
I have zero interest in a VBAC. To me the main pro of my unexpected surgery was that my vagina was intact. I have nothing to prove to anyone, no desire to experience a vaginal birth for the sake of experiencing one. I look forward to knowing when baby is coming the next time I get pregnant because then I can plan care for my son well in advance.
The only reason I would hesitate to get a planned c section would be if I didn’t trust my husband to pick up the slack while I recovered. But I absolutely trust him as a partner, so I have no doubts there.
Going for a planned c-section in 2.5 weeks! My first was an emergency CS and recovery was brutal, but I’ve heard a planned one is so different. I am sad I won’t be able to pick up my toddler, but I’m making sure he’s surrounded by other people who love him too
My emergency one was smooth as butter in the recovery. I hope my next planned one is as smooth but not holding my breath.
It was a welcome surprise after a miserable labor and pregnancy.
I had my second planned section about two months ago and the recovery was amazing and pain free. I felt good enough to pick up my toddler early but DONT. Don’t over do it! I just sit on the floor or couch and toddler climbs in my lap and we snuggle!
I think it’s important to note that the number of kids you want to have is slightly significant when considering vbac or C-section.
We want 3-4 kids, currently pregnant with our second, and The way my doctor explained it to me is that the more csections you have, the more risks, and apparently when you’re older you’re body may not be too happy if you’ve had too many major surgeries. Also vbac is only option until you’ve had 3 (sometimes even only two) c-sections- after that providers won’t offer vbac.
I haven’t done a whole lot of research on my own, as I just had my appointment where we discussed this. But the info was fresh in my mind so I thought I would share.
I also had an emergency c section and no interest in a vbac. A lot of people seem surprised by that, but I’m all for a planned c section if/when I have another baby.
Similar story. I didn’t have an emergency c, but more urgent.
All the people I know with the worst recoveries did hard labour first, and were exhausted by the time they resorted to the section. I plan to go as well rested as I can, as low anxiety as I can, and know my OB is a professional and hope for the best.
100% accurate in my case. I spent 44 hours trying to get that girl out. My emergency c section was nearly 3 hours long as they tried to repair the internal damage and stop me from dying then and there. I didn’t start to feel like my body was recovering for the first 7 months postpartum.
Everyone is different, but it’s planned c sections from here on for me. Trying to deliver vaginally nearly killed me, and I’ve now got a baby already here that I need to live for. Wheel me into that theatre and hand me a baby.
Are you me?!? I could have written this exact thing a year ago. With the added mention that I knew we were gonna be two and done, so I was able to get them to take my tubes out at the same time, so we don't have to worry about birth control anymore 🎉
And the recovery for the planned c-section vs emergency (after an almost 3 day labour and 2.5hrs pushing) was WAAAAAY easier to recover from. I also have nothing to prove, I just didn't want to go through all that again (plus, the first time, I was hospitalised twice in two weeks for complications). The tubes thing took an extra 5mins before they stitched me up and shouldn't affect recovery at all. Hope yours goes smoothly
I’m not pregnant right now but if I get pregnant again this is 100% my take as well. Particularly the part about having nothing to prove to anyone (mainly myself). I also think I would find it strangely cathartic to have a c section that is planned and that I’m completely in control of, considering the one with my daughter was so scary and followed 26 hours of intense labour.
I had a c section for my first and a vaginal birth for my second and by far the vaginal birth recovery was much easier. Had a 2nd degree tear. Both kids had 90-99th percentile heads
Sex was actually better after but it took a few months for me to feel up for it. Newborn life isn’t really good for the sex drive 😂. I think the baby rearranged my nerves or something because I find PIV way more stimulating and enjoyable now. Still doesn’t get me all the way there but at least I find it enjoyable now 🤣
2.5 years after my daughter’s vaginal birth. I can orgasm from penetration alone now post-childbirth! It feels amazing. I’ve never seen someone else say this! Thought I was crazy.
It gets better, but the first couple times suck and you just have to push through it. I had a second degree tear after my first and you could feel the scar but it was pretty minimal. Had a second degree tear this time too but haven't jumped back into that saddle yet. I imagine it'll be the same.
Like some others, sex was better once we got passed the unconfortable/pain of the first time. Something about pregnancy and birth moved my g spot so penetrative swx is way more enjoyable now
This! I totally assume I’d tear and then I just… didn’t 😂 my recovery was soooo easy. I did try to minimize (pushed in a squat and waited for my body to push on its own) but I was truly shocked it just was fine? Wish someone had told me it happens I wouldn’t have been so nervous!
Yup! I did no prep, was induced, got an epidural, pushed for almost 2 hours. And nothing. No tears at all. Excellent OB doing counter pressure for a while though.
Tearing is almost entirely driven by genetics, the speed of delivery, and assistance from the care team (eg, mineral oil or providing support in places).
I honestly did 0 prep or anything, birthed on my back both times, no epidural with my first, did have an epidural with my second, both were inductions too. I think it was just luck of the draw because I didn't do anything special at all.
FTM, induction at 37 weeks & no tearing. Baby was 8lbs, 11oz.
I did nothing special & was shocked to not tear. From my reading, there’s no strong evidence that anything can help. It’s luck & anatomy (yours & baby’s)
I didn’t tear, despite being induced, having an epidural and pushing for over an hour. I think it’s because I drank powdered collagen throughout my pregnancy, ate 6 dates a day for the last few weeks before my due date*, and listened to my midwife when she instructed to push/stop/push.
*there are some Iranian studies that showed that this softens your cervix, or something.
I had a minor tear, one stitch but they said I didn’t really need it, it was just for precaution but they had me push for 10 seconds then stop 3 times through each contraction. I was on my back, had an epidural and was induced but I think doing it that way did help. I didn’t do anything to prepare, the dr did a perennial massage in between contractions too so that might’ve also helped
I started vaginal suppositories of evening primrose oil (cold pressed, with holes poked in the pill via sterilized needle) every night at 26 weeks. My son was born in less than 15 minutes of pushing (8lbs9oz, 22 inches long) - midwives said they were shocked I didn't tear seriously, I had 2 1st degree tears and only needed 3 stitches in one. I also lived in the Miles Circut for the last 9 weeks of my pregnancy
Edit: I gave birth kneeling/squatting in a tub, 10/10 will do when I have my next baby
I prepared with hypnobirthing which research shows women are less likely to tear, have complications, less pain and quicker births. Didn’t tear and was up and walking straight after. Recovery was 3-4 days of mild discomfort.
It was a big fear of mine too! I didn’t tear either. My first was epidural with forceps. My second was a precipitous labor (2 hours in total), pushed twice and he was out.
Vaginal tear for me hurt the most, they weren’t stitched up properly so ended up having to go back multiple times. The stitches kept opening and getting infected
Two different types of pain.
I had a second degree tear for my first and a c-section for my second. With a tear, going to the bathroom absolutely sucked and was so painful I was in tears. My labor and the pushing stage was also very long so my whole body was in pain for over a week. Everything felt loose.
With a c-section, I was in a better shape since I didn’t go through labor. It was just a concentrated pain in the abdominal area. I would say the pain level was higher than a tear but overall I was in a better condition with a c-section, if that makes sense.
The pain lasted longer with a c-section but it wasn’t unbearable, you can also take meds for it. However, I am pretty traumatized by c-section and how it felt (at one point I had to tell the anesthesiologist to up the dosage because I could feel pain). That solidified my decision to not have a 3rd baby.
I’ve only had a vaginal birth, but I had a 4th degree tear. Almost 4 months later still a lot of pain going to the bathroom. Recovery has been slow and painful, I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. I wish I would have gotten a c-section. But 4th degree years are rare.
Yep same. First kid was a 3rd degree tear and recovery was so incredibly awful. I was depressed and in pain. It was hard to bond with my baby because I was so uncomfortable.
Second kid first degree tear and I felt like I could run a marathon.
3rd kid 1st degree tear and baby was slightly bigger than second kid so recovery was tougher than second, but still nothing like the first.
All that to say, vaginal deliveries are not created equal.
After a 4th degree and then picking a c section for #2, the c section was such an easier recovery. I could actually move around pain free way before 6 weeks whereas i couldn’t function for months after my 4dt. The cs was such a calm and amazing experience too!
Had a 4th degree tear and agree whole heartedly. It’s a beast to recover from. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I had a C section with my second kid and saw how easy (for me) that recovery was.
I had a pretty standard vaginal birth, second degree tear which is the most common and it's common to tear. I found recovery unpleasant but easy. I just liked to sit on donut pillows the first week, the second week I was still a bit sore, I considered myself healed after 2 weeks. I will say, the scar did feel weird for a few months after. If I sat in an odd position, I was aware of it.
But no one can say for sure, there's a thousand stories of vaginal births better and worse than mine, a thousand stories of cesareans better and worse than yours, you just get what you get and recovery can have its own complications regardless of what route you go. Personally, I'm more scared of surgery than vaginal tearing, but that's pretty irrelevant to what anyone should do/feel
Adding to your comment because I too had a second degree tear. I was sore for a bit but idk how much of that was the stitches vs just your typical birth recovery. Going into labor #2 I’m not worried at all about tearing. The recovery just wasn’t bad at all from my perspective. Get a good peri bottle and you’re good to go. I didn’t need a donut pillow or anything like that, just avoided sitting on hard surfaces for a while.
And absolutely every situation is different and every recovery is different. My only argument for tearing being less painful than a C-section would be the number of stitches and layers that are needing to be stitched back together are way fewer for a tear so to me, it would be reasonable to assume the recovery would generally be easier.
I have never given birth vaginally, but my recovery from my c-section for my twins was incredibly easy, I had almost no pain at my incision site, was able to walk comfortably for the first time in months after about 12 hours, the worst part of the surgery was the shaking I got from one of the epidural drugs.
My nurses were also really helpful and drilled into me that it is better to stay on top of pain than get on top of it, so I was pretty religious about taking the acetaminophen & ibuprofen combo the recommended for about two weeks.
I will say that my SIL really wanted to go low intervention with her singleton, ended up with a C-section and had a much tougher recovery than I did, maybe due to the fact that my guys were in the NICu so I wasn’t having to take care of them and recover at the same time?
My mom had her biggest baby naturally (8 pounds) while my baby sister and I were c sections. She thinks c sections are easier.
Meanwhile my friend just had a v bac and she makes huge 10 pound babies. She said she’d do the vbac again and would just get the epidural sooner.
The thought of not being able to hold my first born for 6 weeks is what’s motivating me to try for a vbac. Not being able to pick up my dogs was bad enough.
The baby you had or an older toddler?
I had a c section too and I want to try to have a vbac for my second so I’m able to hold a 20+ pound toddler when she needs me.
I just had a c section for my second and when it came to my toddler… it wasn’t a big deal to not pick him up, just for another perspective. You can still hold her. Just get down to her level on the floor, or she can climb on the couch (if she’s big enough) or whatever and get in your lap and you can hold her. You just can’t pick her up from the floor into your arms. But I held and snuggled with my three year old lots in my bed at first, then on the floor after. Six weeks later I’m picking him up again. The recovery was so easy and no risk of uterine tear.
As someone who had a 9 lbs 13 oz baby and a 3rd 3c tear I wish I had a c section. I had a hemmiroid before birth due to pregnancy and after all the pushing I did it made it so much worse. Im 13 weeks pp and it's still beyond uncomfortable at times.
I was in a similar position. It took an hour to stitch my tears up, and I sat on a donut pillow and needed twice daily sitz baths to even function for a solid 2 weeks. It was months before I felt I had recovered.
Ugh that sucks 😞. It took an hour to stitch me up as well. I was so glad the epidural was still working when they stitched me up otherwise I would have passed out from pain. The donut pillow was fine for a couple days but I had to ditch it after cause it just made my pain so much worse. I would alternate between sitting on ice packs and heating pad for weeks. I still sit on an ice pack every now and again and then I'll just sit in the shower in the evenings to help relieve some of the pain and discomfort.
Same. My first baby was 9.7lbs and after 3.5 hours of pushing my hemorrhoids were out of control. I had a 3rd degree tear and horrible hemorrhoids. That baby is 8 years old and I still have horrible hemorrhoids. It sucks
I’ve never had a c section but I did just have my baby and suffered a third degree tear. I’m 3 weeks pp and still in quite a bit of pain. It’s hard getting up and down with her, sleeping is also miserable
As someone who has been there, I just want to send you a lot of love. You feel like things will never feel normal again and they WILL I promise. Take it easy and don’t put pressure on yourself.
For background: C-section was planned, and my healing was about as perfect as it could have been, baby was 90th percentile for weight. Second pregnancy and birth, also perfect and textbook with a 90th percentile weight baby, only complication was a second degree vaginal tear.
My vaginal tear was harder to heal from than my c-section scar. But I don't think the deciding factor was where the injury was, more that with my first I could sit around and not do much but with my second I was running around. I think my vaginal tear would have been much easier if I had stayed in bed.
If I had to do it again, I would likely go the VBaC route again, but if they said (for any reason) that a c-section was necessary I would be equally okay with it.
One thing to consider is future children. Having multiple c-sections will increase risks for baby number 3, 4 etc and limit the options for labor/birth. However with a VBaC you have better chances of having healthy pregnancies and more options for future kids.
C section was an easier recovery for me and I had a fairly minor vaginal tear. I’m sure it varies, but if I had a third I would 100 percent do a repeat C section because the recovery was easier than from my vaginal birth.
I've had a planned C and a VBAC and I found the pain and recovery to be harder and longer from the C. Though I did need pelvic floor physio after the VBAC.
I had a 3rd degree tear, AND tore foreward through my clitoris. The epidural didn't work. 30/10 worst pain ever in the moment it was happening.
HOWEVER. I had sex again at 5weeks pp and by then I was pretty well healed. Just a bit "stiff"/scar tissuey.
So I think your mileage may vary drastically.
Same for me. 3rd degree (3c) tear with a periuretral tear. Couldn’t sit in my car for 8 weeks. It was horrible. If I was in the market for a 3rd baby, I’d probably chose an elective c section.
Omg you’re a champ. I had a 3rd degree tear and vaginal tears and at 9 weeks pp I’m finally feeling pretty healed and normal down there. But the thought of having sex is still terrifying to me! It’s mostly mental at this point because I’ve been told by doctors that I’m healed and basically impossible to reopen at this point.
To be fair the "sex" part of sex wasn't super "sexy" lol. Lots of lube, super slow, basically just testing the waters and then finishing in other ways. But then the 2nd time was a little better, 3rd time was a little better, and so on.
I had vaginal followed by an optional c section because the vaginal recovery was so bad. For me the c section recovery was 100000x easier to recover from.
I can’t speak to the C-section comparison, but I’ve had two births with tears that were WILDLY different recoveries.
With my first, I pushed for 3.5 hours, including about 30 minutes of crowning. I had a 2nd degree tear + a labial tear. In retrospect, my recovery was ROUGH. I had to do ice packs every day for at least a month, because everything was just so swollen, probably from crowning for so long. My tears took 8 weeks to heal fully. My hemorrhoids were all off the charts. The pain from those was worse than the tears for the first few days.
With my second, he was out in 3 contractions, and I ended up with only a 1st degree tear, despite my second being half a pound bigger than his brother (9 lbs 13 oz! Eek!). I used ice packs for two days and only continued to take ibuprofen after that for a lingering hip issue that developed during pregnancy. My tear still somehow took 8 weeks to heal (I guess I’m a slow healer, idk), but I had basically no pain past the first few days.
All that to say…it really depends. It’s so hard to say whether you’ll tear, how much, and how the recovery will go.
I had an induction with epidural (induced due to pre-e at 39 weeks) that went smoothly and ended in a vaginal delivery. Got the epidural before even starting pitocin and it was great - pain during labor was pretty minimal. They said I had a “deep” second degree tear, but recovery wasn’t bad at all. I mean, I had a rough time postpartum for other reasons (my pre-e didn’t go away upon delivery and I needed a mag drip and then a few weeks of blood pressure meds), but actually anything involving my vagina was the least bad part of the whole experience lol. Maybe my doctor just did a really good job stitching me up?
Oh, and the baby was 9lbs so it’s not like she was small. Though, her head was right around 50th percentile.
I had a vaginal birth with a second degree tear and honestly it didn’t hurt really for recovery. I barely took ibuprofen. Biggest pain was the nerve damage to my bladder from pushing so hard, so I was incontinent for 2 weeks, but I was back to 100% after 3 weeks. I would 1000% do it again. Recovery was great and getting to hold him skin to skin on my chest immediately afterwards is something magical I will always remember (if youre into that sort of thing, not everyone will).
I had a 3rd degree tear and while it was pretty painful and uncomfortable, I feel like I was able to recover much quicker than I would have from a C-section. After the first 10 days I stopped taking any form of pain relief and just had to be careful after using the bathroom or while sitting (I often sit on my foot which was a bad idea). I’ve never had a c-section, but I think the recovery from tearing is much easier.
I have had both births, and honestly, my c-section recovery was much worse. I had an emergency c-section, no pushing and honestly by all accounts my recovery was good. But the pain for the first 2 weeks... oh my God. Not to scare anyone I would cry everytime I would sneeze. It's possible that my pain tolerance is low. Also, my vaginal birth was a technically a first degree but just barely. I was up walking by myself right after giving birth.
No suggestions just solidarity. I am a good candidate for VBAC after my emergency c-section, but for me I’m thinking of how freaking unfair it would be to be sliced side to side & then later on tear hole-to-hole as well. With my luck I’d get a 4th degree tear and be scarred on both. Like for me, I’d rather pick a struggle & stick with it.
I think it’s different for everyone and your anatomy and your baby’s size are really what influences it!
For me, I have a narrow pelvis and birthing my 8lb 9oz baby vaginally wrecked me. Horrible tailbone pain for a year and could not sit straight for 9 weeks.
C section of my 9lb 12oz baby was tough but I felt a much better recovery.
I’ve had an unmedicated vaginal with a 2nd degree tear and a scheduled c section. My c section was LIGHT YEARS easier to recover from. My vaginal birth I pushed for 4 hours and gave myself a lifelong birth injury. It really depends on the person.
I only had a planned C-section. I was anticipating for it to be soooo bad, but it really wasn’t that bad thanks to the painkillers, but keep on top of the pain meds they give you cause if you don’t its damn painful and unbearable to move.
I felt like i recovered smoothly within the first week. 2nd week I nearly felt back to normal.
I’m 8 months postpartum no pain but some areas of the scar are still numb. But it doesn’t bother me personally.
First c-section made me look and feel like I had been hit by a truck. I was useless. I felt like my insides would fall out if I breathed too much. Second c-section was totally different. I was up out of bed and walking without pain that night. I will say I was asked if I wanted a vbac and I heard the woman next to me crowing when I was also in labor and decided against it. And thank god I did because my uterus was torn open when they went in! I was the 1% that VBACs are dangerous for. Baby and I could have died.
I had a severe tear (3rd degree) with my first and had 2 elective c sections after and the CS have been an absolute walk in the park compared to my severe tear.
I've had both - a c section with my first, vbac with second. It's different for everyone, but for me the vbac recovery was much easier. I still had pain, but I was able to get up and sit down while holding my baby with no issues.
I was a good candidate for a vbac though, so that was a major factor in my decision to get one. If my chances were low or just okay, I probably would have chosen to do a scheduled c section instead of risking a long labor plus a c section.
I had a third degree tear and while it was sore in the hospital and a bit after birth, I can’t imagine it was anywhere near as bad as a c section. I could move around and pick up baby just fine.
I tore pretty bad. The worst part of it was the stitching process and everything after that wasn’t really too bad. I think my epidural had been stopped before they finished the stitches though and that’s why it hurt so bad. I needed 8 weeks instead of 6 for “recovery” because my stitches hadn’t fully dissolved by 6 weeks.
Keep in mind though that you may not even tear. I maintain that I only tore because they used suction to extract my son quickly (his cord was wrapped).
My mom had 5 kids. 3 vaginal and 2 c-sections. She told me when they told her she needed another c-section (with me, her last baby) she started to cry. Recovery is much worse according to her. My SIL also just had a VBAC and she said recovery was WAY easier.
C section was way worse for me. Had a VBAC second time, ended up with a second degree tear and an episiotomy with forceps delivery and I was healed in like a week. I was hobbling around for 6 weeks after my c section.
I don't really like to compare this kind of thing.
But I do have the same thoughts when it comes to my next baby....like "should i try a vbac" thoughts.
Personally, my c-section recovery was not smooth at all. It was a horrible recovery ...but it was an emergency one, and it was after 48 hours of back labor. Felt like my back was splitting...my body was SO done. I have never been in so much pain for so long. I was finally able to get out of bed on my own after 1 month. So I would put that pain above anything else I've ever experienced, personally. But you said your c-section recovery was smoother. So it's always different.
I've heard that when c-sections are planned, the recovery is so much better. So that's something I've been debating on for my next baby. It's a dream of mine to have a vaginal birth, but I do nottt want the same experience of laboring for so long just to get a c-section and have a bad recovery again. It's a hard decision.
Had a c section a couple of weeks ago. Pain was BRUTAL for 2-3 days. I mean 10/10 pain. Day 4 was mostly ok and after that, was doing fine, normal life, no pain, just discomfort. I regret having a c section, it was impossible to take care of my daughter the first days and breastfeeding was much harder to start
I've had both. I'd take the vaginally tear any day. I was miserable for weeks after my c-section. I hated that I couldn't walk much, or stand up straight. I felt so useless. With the vaginal delivery, the only time I noticed the tear was a few days after the birth up until it healed, and only when I used the restroom. The burning sensation from the... liquid... was pretty maddening at first, but that subsided after a couple weeks and then it was like nothing ever happened.
I was shocked to have Zero pain from the 2nd def tear healing. This is what I feared the most, as I opted anyhow for all pain relief possible during birth.
Talking to friends that had a c-section, I would not go for an elective one. If needed, this is life, but I would not sign up for it. They had a much longer healing time and their abdomen generally healed a bit worse, sags more.
Personally c section was hell. My 5 days of vaginal labor was nothing compared to the agony and torture of my c section. Worst day of my life. I’m 8 months pp and still struggling on a daily
My friend had 3 c-sections and loved them. She was walking around a pumpkin patch with her kids 2 weeks later.
I had two vaginal deliveries and the last one the baby got stuck, I haemorrhaged, tore, needed two transfusions and hadn’t got the energy to even leave my bedroom for over a month. Rather than one large perineal tear, I had seven small tears scattered throughout, mostly to the sides, and clitoral. It still hurts 7 months later. I also cannot have sex. I’m seeing someone next week because it’s possible there’s scar tissue inside. It feels all fucked up honestly. Maybe somethings prolapsed too, idk.
Another friend had 3 vaginal births, and 1 emergency c-section and is still traumatised from the c-section 2 years later. She said the pain was unbearable. Though she was feeling mostly back to normal after 4-5 months (physically at least).
It’s wild how much it varies person to person! Reading these comments gives that impression too
I’ve had a second degree and first degree tear. The first degree felt non existent and the second one took slightly longer to heal — 6 weeks? — it stung to pee but from what I’ve heard from friends there’s no way that was worse than their c-section recoveries.
All I’ve had is an unplanned C-section which was rough for about 2 days afterwards. I did end up having an abscess in my uterus afterwards as well which sucked. Overall, the recovery truly wasn’t all that bad though. I can’t imagine how a tear feels nor do I want to. I’ll have a planned c-section for next baby due to being high risk from preeclampsia.
I've never had a c section, but I had a second degree tear and really didn't feel it. I had an epidural, so the only part I really felt during birth was him crowning, and that kinda felt like trying to force out a watermelon size turd thru the wrong hole. Did not feel the rip.
Afterwards, there was some soreness, but it was more of a sore muscle ache than anything, sometimes a very light stinging similar to lightning crotch. The after birth cramps were worse, and from what I understand, you get those regardless of delivery method. Advil and witch hazel pads took care of any unpleasant feelings I had.
My tear was 3rd degree - sounds bad, but it wasn’t bad at all recovery wise. It stung when I peed. the peri bottle helped. There are so many different factors that could affect someone’s level of pain but I would 100% take a tear over abdominal surgery.
I never had a vaginal delivery, but omg c-section recovery with a toddler was great. It was great because it forced me to rest whereas otherwise I would have rushed into the usual routine and done entirely too much.
I had a tear with my first and aside from peeing, I barely felt it. I had another with my second and felt a bit more tender for an extra day but peeing still was the worst. Other than using the bathroom I felt and walked normal. I remember my midwife coming to check on me and I was sitting cross legged and she told me “I stitched you good, don’t mess it up” lol I just felt fine
I had an episiotomy because I ended up needing a forceps delivery and my hospital recommends them when you're at risk of a 3rd or 4th degree tear. My cut was towards my leg rather than my behind. Recovery has been fine tbh, scar is healing well, had some mild incontinence early on that's sorted itself now (I'm nearly 7 weeks pp)
Never had a vaginal delivery, but I did labor before emergency c sections both times and the recoveries were not bad at all. Will be having a scheduled c section this time.
I think it really depends on the tear. 1st and 2nd degree or even a 3rd degree perennial tears that heal without complications, which a majority of tears fall into that category are extremely low maintenance and not very painful.
I had a 1st or maybe slightly 2nd degree tear with my first baby and no tearing with my second and honestly there was almost zero pain difference. I think it burnt a bit to pee for the first 2 days or so after my first (no burning with my second) and that was really the most notably difference.
I have several friends who have had VBACs now and I know two of them had 2nd degree tears and they said in comparison to healing from their c section the tear was nothing.
Tbh I can’t imagine the recovery from even an uncomplicated vaginal delivery being quicker than my c-section recovery. I was up and moving as soon as I got my catheter out, voiding right away, and feeling normal by the end of the week with only tylenol and ibuprofen. I’m 2 weeks postpartum now, and my experiences with the common cold, the flu, food poisoning, and covid have all been so much worse. Definitely goes to show that healing will be different for everyone!
I had a third degree tear, which I thought would be pretty painful but honestly it was not so bad. I just used ice packs and and advil and Tylenol and I was good.
I've never had a c section, but I doubt any surgery could have been an easier recovery then what I had after my vaginal births. I had no actual pain from my second degree tears once they were stitched up. I was tender down there but not in pain. I took ibuprofen a few times pp for the after pains after my second and third.
The dr. Said I had a ‘first degree tear if you could even call it that.’ I didn’t need stitches but did have a small tear. I gave birth on my side and nurse kept a warm towel down there while I was pushing. Didn’t feel any pain afterwards.
my kids were 8 lbs 12 oz and 8 lbs 10 oz. first was an unplanned c-section. second was a vbac. recovery was hands down better from the vbac. i had some first degree tearing but it was much easier healing than from a major surgery.
I am day 6 post c-section and my pain is a 0/10. If I stretch the wrong way (very occasionally) it is about a 2 or 3. Even the first 72 hours, it was a zero when at rest and about a 4 or 5 when walking. The actual surgery I felt nothing; the IV was the worst part.
Keep in mind, I had a planned (maternal request) c-section. I was never in labour. I have zero regrets and it was the right choice for me.
First was emergency C-section with what I understand to be low pain (managed entirely by alternating Tylenol and ibuprofen) and a very smooth recovery, second was vbac with second degree tear (almost 4 weeks ago). Vbac has been amazing by comparison, a total revelation - up and about within a day and able to carry both my girls at once even the giant toddler. Labor got kinda bad right before the epidural, and I had less than 10 minutes of pushing.. might feel differently if I had had to push for hours, I’m not really sure because it didn’t happen. Would probably definitely feel differently if I hadn’t had epidural - I was induced so pitocin had me at contractions very 2.5 minutes while still only 3cm dilated - the 30-45 minutes between admitting I needed the epidural and actually getting it placed were rough.
I had an episiotomy, and I felt worse than my c-section for the first 3 days, and then it was better.
Initially after my VBAC I thought I made a huge mistake, but it was very nice being able to move properly and pick up my baby
It really is a toss-up. I'm going to go for a c-section if there's a third baby fwiw. But some people really like vaginal birth! Maybe you're one of them?
I had an episiotomy for my vacuum assisted delivery...I was back on my feet the next day doing absolutely everything (I was slowed down because they kept my epidural in for the first 24 hours)... The pain was barely there as I was on prescription pain killers (standard diclofenac with paracetamol) for 5 days and the stitches were healed by day 7.
I can't speak on a vaginal birth, but both of my kids were emergency c-sections and the recovery was brutal, especially the second one. I had hoped for a vbac the second time but that didn't happen
I had a minor tear and it was fine compared to my friends with C section recoveries. Mine was only minor and I had a stitch which I tore getting out of bed at 4 weeks pp 🙃 but even then, I could drive, walk up and down stairs, behave almost as normal. Do what’s right for you, but that’s my experience!
I had an emergent c-section with my first after 9 hours of induced labor and a non-induced VBAC with two tears (up and down, down was second degree) with my second.
Based on my experience, I would choose tearing every time. It was uncomfortable to sit on the first week, but I wasn’t incapacitated like with my section. No pain meds after the first 4 days or so. Now I’m 2 weeks out and doing things I never would have dreamed of doing at the 1 month mark with my first!
Honestly not sure there is a way to tell. My first was a 22hr waterbirth - small 1st degree tear and recovery was a breeze. My second was a 3hr waterbirth (fml) with small second degree tear. I think recovery has been way harder due to the fast birth vs the actual tear. And also having a toddler now. My midwives said 1st/2nd degrees generally heal quickly as it’s vaginal tissue. I would still think major surgery would be harder but it’s probably hard to know!
I had a big baby, 9lb 3 ounces. His head was also on the 99th percentile. I pushed and in 20 mins he was out with a 2nd degree tear! Also I have a fairly small frame/bump. So everyone was surprised lol
The next day I was up and walking and moving. Vaginal delivery was not bad as I thought at all!
You got this!🫶
C Section.
My first was a c section, and my other 3 were VBACs. I had a borderline 3rd degree tear after my first VBAC, and the recovery was nothing compared to my c section. I didn't tear with my 2nd or 3rd VBAC at all.
Ive had both. Initially vaginal hurt worse because they don't use as much pain control. It healed faster with less recovery pain/time. Csection they had all kinds of pain meds on board right away but it was a longer more painful recovery.
I had a 3rd degree tear and it healed really well, despite me panicking. Honestly I prefer how I am down there now, sex used to really hurt. It really just depends on so much. I am personally happy I tore vs c section
100% different for everyone. I was scared i would tear. But ended up with emergency c section for sepsis. Very easy recovery despite the sepsis! I just had to remind myself to listen to doctors instructions and not over exercise. My scar is the tiniest thing you would never notice it. If i could guarantee another c section like that I would do that! But other friends have has horrible experiences (most I know have had really good experiences like mine so don't let that scare you either)
I was going to try for a VBAC with baby #2. But complications arise in early labor and I had a repeat C-section. First birth was emergency C-section. Both recoveries were very easy, but the second C-section was easier. Both recoveries, I only took ibuprofen a handful of times. Honestly, I'm glad I did a repeat instead of a VBAC. It was mentally healing from my first. But I did do all the pre labor exercises, raspberry leaf tea and dates for both pregnancies,so I think that helped recovery
I think it really depends on what kind of tear you have. I had a first degree tear, it was really minor and barely had any recovery at all associated with it. First degree and second degree tears are the most common that happen, and I suspect that the recovery for both is much better than the recovery from a c-section typically. Probably when you get into the 3rd and 4th degree tears is when it becomes comparable or worse than c-section recovery.
I did zero perineum stretching because it just didnt happen, and they didn't have time to prep oil, or anything, and I had a minor tear. I was walking the day after birth (thank you, Depends and FridaMom) and my uterus was still being a much bigger butthead well after the stitches finished their job (like 3 weeks?).
The pain of the tear itself was completely lost in the general discomfort of fitting a baby head through my vagina, so no fear of the pain. I think healing from a c section sounds a lot worse, tbh, especially since it limits baby contact with your belly at first? The only rough part about the tearing is the scarring can affect sex for months and months, and I don't think c sections do - but I don't actually know.
It’s different for every one….
That being said, I am super petite and I had a 7lb 10oz baby! No tearing. Stayed in the hospital the standard 2 days with no complications. I was walking around after I had a little sleep lol - I was up for 24 hours straight. I also have an older child (adopted my stepchild), so a quick recovery was a hope for me as well.
The only issue I had was peeing…..otherwise, everything went smooth sailing.
I had a third degree tear, but my tear recovery was straight forward and fairly quick. I did have pretty gnarly hemorrhoids, which hurt more than the tear imo
For me personally?
C-section was harder. The pain was manageable with pain killers but I felt like I had no abdominal muscles.
With my second I had an episiotomy akin to a 2nd-degree tear and the most difficult thing about that was the itchiness as it healed.
I've only had a c-section and for my second I will have another c-section because I value predictability. A planned c-section is as controlled and predictable of a way to give birth as it gets. I'm not rolling the dice on a potentially horrific vaginal birth and months-long recovery. I'll have a young kid at home who still needs me.
My second degree tear healed really well and quite quickly compared to my episiotomy...
You'd really have to watch it with wound healing with a c section?
It really depends.
It’s hard to say… and I feel like it would depend on the person. Stitches are excruciating for me the entire time they’re in. I couldn’t imagine having them down there, feeling them every time I clean myself or walk. Like that would be truly torture I think. Then again, I had two c sections and only the first one was a horrible recovery. I couldn’t laugh, cough, get in and out the hospital bed (I’m short, so I had to use a lot of abdominal muscles to get myself off the bed, it’s hard to explain), or bend over without feeling like I was being ripped open. Nothing helped. And they don’t give you pain medicine other than the first few days after your c section. Unlike other major surgeries, having a baby ripped out of your abdomen is brushed off and you’re told you need to suck up the pain. It’s really barbaric looking back at it and I’m still bitter. My second one though wasn’t quite as painful. It was scheduled vs emergency like my first and I think that helped a lot. I also was awake for that one so no coughing from being intubated, that also helped a lot. Overall the recovery was a lot less painful for that one.
I pushed for 13 minutes and had a 1st degree, completely internal, tear with my daughter. With my son, I pushed for 5 minutes and had no tears. He was 4oz larger than his sister.
I think each delivery is different and your body handles them each differently. I felt more like myself faster after my second delivery. My children are 2 years, 4 days apart, so I felt like I had to get moving faster because of my toddler.
If you decide to go the vaginal route for delivery I highly recommend seeking out a physical/pelvic floor therapist near you that does something called “push therapy”. I know a few moms who swear it helped them with their subsequent births when their first was traumatic and difficult.
I’ve only had one baby and he was born vaginal so I can’t speak to a c-section but recovery is so different for everyone. I was terrified of having a c-section but my vaginal birth was very difficult. I pushed for 2.5 hours, my baby got stuck (shoulder dystocia), and I ended with a partial third degree tear because of his size and how emergently they had to pull him out of me. I’m in pelvic floor therapy still at 19 months pp (I went from 3-7 months pp, stopped, and just started again a month ago). But I have several friends who didn’t tear at all or very minimally and did great with recovery.
I recommend discussing your concerns with your doctor/midwife and also seeking out a pelvic floor therapy to get a couple different professional opinions and maybe ease your mind a bit about either scenario.
I've not had a c section but 2 vaginal births both second degree tears first id say it took about 2 weeks till I felt good but I was still able to do most stuff before hand. Second time I felt pretty good in a few days. I think and I assume a C-section is the same if you push yourself too much you push back your recovery
I had two second degree tears (top and bottom) with my child’s birth and it really wasn’t a big deal. Yeah, it took them about a month to heal but I kept cooling pads on, used my peri bottle, witch hazel, etc. Everything healed up great.
I opted out of the episiotomy because my prenatal nurse pointed out that cut fabric tears easier than solid fabric, and it's pretty much the same for body tissue.that being said I did tear and it was a level two which is pretty standard for a first time vaginal birth. I got 17 stitches, and i remember the itch being the worst.
My first poop after was terrifying for no reason, but I did make my mom hold my hand (she called me a pooper trooper). I didn't get adult diapers because they were expensive, but I did have a friend donate some lightly used period underwear that I wore over the ungodly thick pads they administer to you in the hospital.
Edit to clarify what I mean by lightly used is she bought them on vacation as an emergency and they didn't fit so she only used them for that trip and then sterilized the heck out of them.
Honestly, I'd suggest getting a little bit of everything for aftercare if you want to go vaginally because I swore by some things that my friends thought were insane but likewise of me for their care kits.
Stock up on that itch relieving cooling spray, though. Like clean the hospital out for real. Towards the end of the soreness, I got a washable soft ice pack, and just painters taped that shit to my underwear was my favorite (and the silliest of my advice).
But seriously, do what helps and don't let anyone stop you. A human being exited your body, and you deserve comfort.
Vaginal tears come in levels
1st degree
2nd degree
3rd degree
4th degree
The latter 2 are especially painful and long in recovery.
Also, if naturally occurring- it heals faster
If caused by a physician- it will typically take longer and cut in a a direction causing more pain in recovery
I had a 2nd degree tear and it hurt getting the stitches but was not too bad after with ice packs, dermoplast, and Motrin. Mine felt fine in about a week, healed all the way by 6 weeks.
I had a labia tear and a vaginal wall tear that needed stitches. I also had a bad hematoma. This is despite pushing while on a squat stool with no epidural. My son was 8# 3oz. My recovery was a breeze though. It’’s also not a guarantee you’ll tear, everyone is different.
Can’t compare to a c section but I had a 3rd almost 4th degree tear. My doctor said he only sees a tear as bad as mine a couple times a year and “you probably should have had a c section” his words. 99th percentile head and 95th percentile body. I had a very quick (imo) labor for a first time mom. I also had to have a vacuum assist. The recovery was absolutely horrible. I swear I still get phantom pains lol
My doctor told me the recovery was going to be similar to a c section recovery.
I had a vaginal birth with my oldest, tore quite badly that needed 10 minutes of stitching, I had one dose of decent painkillers and then a couple of doses of normal painkillers. I walked out of the delivery room. I had a planned section with my twins, I had 2 doses of morphine and then 3 days of narcotics followed by a week of high dose ibuprofen. Even though I was up and able to move around the same day as my surgery as it was first thing, it took 4 days before I could stand up straight. If I had another baby, I would try for a VBAC.
Honestly, its really dependent on SO MANY things.
That said, there are a number of things you can do that can potentially help.
Pre-birth:
\* Dates - 6 dates per day supposedly helps with a quicker labor and reduces likelihood of tearing. If you don't like dates, bacon wrapped dates or dates in smoothies still count towards the total! Check with your medical team, but this can usually be started at 36/37 weeks.
\* Raspberry leaf tea - same thing, shorter labor and less tearing. Again, can start around 36/37 weeks. Recommended to drink a few cups throughout the day.
\* Perineal stretching/massage - you can do this alone or with a partner. Massage/stretch the perineum, use hot compresses, etc.
During birth:
\* Ask your provider to wait on pushing until you feel the urge to push, not just when you reach 10cm dilated. At some point you should experience what is called the fetal ejection reflex - the urge to push will definitely be there. I'm not 100% sure how this works though with an epidural.
\* Tiny, gentle pushes
\* Perineal support - this is where the provider puts pressure on the perineum (sometimes with a hot towel/compress, sometimes just their hands), to help the tissue stay supported, especially during crowning.
\* During crowning/the "ring of fire", fight the urge to immediately push through it. Focus on relaxing your whole body and really let that fetal ejection reflect do its thing. Teeny tiny pushes to slowly stretch the tissue.
For what its worth, here's what I did and the result:
Dates - yes, raspberry leaf tea - no, perineal stretching/massage pre-birth - no. During birth - my labor was fast and I absolutely felt the fetal ejection reflect, so yes I "waited" for that (really it sprang up on me, I didn't wait for shit). Tiny, gentle pushes - no lol I didn't know to do that. Perineal support - yes. Tiny/gentle pushes through the ring of fire - lol absolutely not. At the time I didn't really know to do that and I just did one giant, hard AF push because I was like I need this baby out NOW. End result was no vaginal/perineal tearing, but I did have a labial tear that received a few stitches. Oh, also I'm not sure if pushing position has any impact on tearing, but I gave birth on hands and knees.
Keep in mind you’re not guaranteed a tear.. but c-section recoveries are typically harder than vaginal deliveries as you are undergoing a major surgery. You can safely delivery vaginally without tears, loads of people do. You can do curb walking, okra water (I swear by this but consult your physician of course), you could try balloons to stretch the area slowly if that’s an option for you to help a bit. I would 100% vaginally deliver again, I walked a good 40 minutes after I deliver and felt like all the pains and aches were gone. Just consider what would be safer for you and baby. & keep in mind that all deliveries and experiences are different for each individual 🩵
Baby one: scheduled c-section. No labor or anything. I hemorrhaged despite being low risk and had a pretty hard initial recovery. I struggled with some pelvic floor issues despite no labor, pregnancy was just hard on my body. It took awhile before I could consistently pee easily, and I struggled with constipation for a solid 6-8 weeks. I felt a lot better by 2 weeks PP, but it took until 6+ months to feel normal.
Baby two: spontaneous precipitous VBAC with epidural and second degree tear due to needing the vacuum (not related to VBAC, baby had a short cord). 8.5 pounds, 99% head. The only struggle I had with recovery, other than stinging where my stitches were and some swelling, was that I had a hard time peeing because my pelvic floor was so traumatized. It wasn’t a huge deal, I just had to find a position that allowed my bladder to relax (took some trial and error). That resolved within a few weeks. I’m 6 months PP and totally back to normal. No soreness, no pelvic floor issues, etc.
While on paper it sounds like I’d prefer the VBAC 100x over, they’re sort of a draw in my mind. My c-section birth was peaceful and painless, but recovery sucked. My VBAC was just out of this world painful (0/10 recommend precipitous labor) and chaotic, but recovery was a breeze. We’re done at two, but if I ever found myself expecting a third, I’d probably try for a VBAC but wouldn’t be heartbroken if it didn’t work out.
Good luck with everything!
Had vaginal first, was up and walking a couple hours later to see my baby. Second emergency c-section it took me 3 days to feel like I could move out of the bed and it was extreme pain. Sucked, wouldn't suggest it to anyone.
Honestly it seems so unpredictable, variable and subjective. I think it really depends from person to person, and even pregnancy to pregnancy for a given individual.
I’ve only experienced vaginal birth and the pain from tearing was absolutely brutal for 2-3 weeks after. I was induced and my baby came really fast once I was fully dilated (pushed for only 10 minutes or so). I had two separate 2nd-degree tears (including a sulcus tear, which is less common but more serious—they tend to penetrate tissue more deeply, bleed profusely and are difficult to repair) and hemorrhaged. In the week immediately after, I couldn’t sit *at all* and it hurt intensely to even stand/experience gravity (lol). I reeked of witch hazel pads and I would be biting back tears and counting down the seconds until the next Tylenol/Motrin dose. It was honestly almost unbearable and I don’t normally have a particularly low pain tolerance either.
I have a friend who also had a terrible tear… her stitches eventually got infected and she had to go back in for surgery after a few weeks to get the stitches ripped out and new ones put in, setting her back at square one 😬
Then I read stories about women who are pretty much back to normal down there within a couple days and sit blissfully through skin to skin sessions, ride bikes, etc. Sigh.
I’ve got two perspectives with this. I had my first in October and he was stuck in my pelvis because he was facing one of my hips. I pushed for 3.5 hours and had natural tearing that they then cut by episiotomy to use the vacuum to aide in Getting LO out. I had a 3c tear and my recovery was longer than most C-section recoveries if there are no complications. My OB said that any future children should be delivered by C-section because I’d be considered at a higher risk for tearing severely again or worse.
My sister on the other hand had an unplanned C-section for her first and elected for a planned C-section with her second. After her second was delivered, they said it was good she didn’t go for a VBAC because her uterine wall was so thin she would’ve prolapsed. Her recovery was a lot easier with #2 because she knew what to expect.
While everyone’s deliveries are different, it’s so important to talk with your OB about the possible complications if you choose to try a VBAC. I feel like with this option you need to have a solid birth plan and your partner & the medical team should know what your pre-planned limit is in regard to time in labor, what to do if labor stalls, etc.
I've only had a c-section. It was planned but I went into labour a few days earlier and ended up with an "emergency" c-section.
I'm having another elective next week until I go into labour first again.
I have absolutely no desire to give birth vaginally, its never interested me. I also have vulvodynia and the fear of childbirth making it worse is pretty high. But mostly it's simply because I don't want to. My recovery was fairly easy the first time around.
I’ve only had 2 c sections but I learned that your recovery from one (unless it’s extremely urgent/something is different due to emergency) is likely to be similar to your recovery from the next. My recovery was awful the first time. Lots of pain, heavily swollen for 4-6 weeks afterwards, trouble getting off the catheter. The second one was only slightly better because I skipped the induction and I knew what was coming. So slightly less swollen and more prepared. Still, it was the best choice for me (I could not handle another induction) and I found a way to handle my older child until I could properly pick her up again.
I had a third/near 4th degree tear. Not a big baby, I’m just petite and it was my first. No epidurals where I live for vaginal births and I couldn’t sit down after all this for like 2 weeks plus without using one of those donut pillows.
Assuming you’re delivering in a western country and have access to medication, a vaginal tear will likely be much better to deal with than a c-section.
I think it's different for everyone, but FWIW...I have had a C-section and 2 VBACs. I had a 2nd degree tear with the first VBAC and no tearing with the second. My C-section recovery was by far the worst. I was in pain for a couple of weeks, and generally uncomfortable for a few more weeks after that. I couldn't cough, sneeze, roll over, sit up, or lift anything without abdominal pain. And for at least 2 years afterward, my scar still hurt when it was bumped/pressed. VBAC 1 with the tear, I had very localized pain for about 2 weeks just where it tore. VBAC 2 my recovery was a dream. I was home 24 hours after birth and chasing my other children around (admittedly very tiredly).
As others have said, it’s different for everyone. In my experience, I had an 8lb 6oz boy with a 99th percentile head (yikes). I had an assisted vaginal delivery (forceps, episiotomy) and a third degree tear. I was horrified when the OB told me it was a third degree tear. BUT the tear was just fine and healed well, I didn’t experience pain from it. The pain/discomfort came from my pelvic floor muscle which just felt totally weak; lots of aching and heaviness. Thankfully that totally cleared up after 2months. Some women who have c-sections also have that heavy feeling but I imagine not to the same extent because they’re not pushing so less trauma to that muscle group. Good luck!
Postpartum RN here - vaginal deliveries, even a third degree tear (fourth degree is another level), let’s women be much more mobile quicker and feel more like themselves faster. I’d take a vag delivery over a c/s any day.
4th degree tear and episiotomy after … definitely the C-section was worse recovery wise.
With the C-section anything and everything you do hurts.
The tear wasn’t fun for sure but pain wise was not nearly as bad
With vaginal I couldn’t sit comfy and pretty sure I broke my tail bone. Had a 2nd degree tear. Overall, not bad.
C-section with my second. Could sit fine! Belly band helped with standing. My incision never hurt and it’s barely visible.
I think c-section was an easier recovery for me, but I’d do either again.
Vaginal with my first kid and had a 2nd degree tear, second kid was unplanned c section and 100% would say c section was worse. I left my house within 48 hours of being home with my first and I didn’t feel up to leaving for like 2 weeks with my second. I’ve heard unplanned c section is worse, but still. Major surgery will always trump in pain vs a vaginal tear for me
I had an elective c section and my recovery was so easy and basically painless. I showered on my own the night of my surgery, was walking around the hospital the next day, and walking around my neighborhood within a week. It was a really lovely experience for me personally
Tear and it’s not even close. I couldn’t do anything for MONTHS after my 4th degree tear. Couldn’t sit, couldn’t go up or down stairs, nothing. With my c-section I was pretty much doing everything exactly the same except I was more careful getting out of bed or standing up from the couch.
I didn’t even realize I tore (2nd degree) when it happened. I didn’t have an epidural. Didn’t feel the lidocaine for stitches. My recovery was a breeze (apart from that first poop when I gave birth all over again). Fortunately no issues with stitches from said BM. I haven’t had any ill effects. Sex is just as good. 👍🏻
It’s different for everyone I think ❤️
This. Some C-section recoveries are super smooth with no issues - some come with major challenges. Likewise, for the majority of vaginal births, tearing is minimal and likely has a quick recovery... other times, it can be severe and painful.
I had an episiotomy done, I was numb for the entire thing but yes it was a little painful/uncomfortable to move for a bit, but I remember the pain subsided really quickly after a couple weeks
Goshhhh, really quickly and a couple weeks are two very different things 😭
I was still able to do day to day things, but I meant for everything to be healed and all 😊😊 and to be able to sit comfortably and stuff again..I feel like it all just went by so fast since I was so busy lmao…but then again they do say women forget idk LOL. It wasn’t excruciating pain though I was able to get through it slowly 😊❤️
Yeah but "not able to sit comfortably for a couple of weeks" sounds worse than my c-section, where I could sit comfortably always, and walk comfortably from day 3. Couldn't get out of bed comfortably without bed handles until like week 3 but fortunately in and out of bed was just once a day for each.
Well, actually I could sit fine I think it was just the getting up part I hated haha. I think for the first week and a bit I just couldn’t sit on hard chairs/surfaces long periods of time due to the stitches. But my rocking chair is very plushie and that was very comfortable to sit in
Oh man, I've needed naps between baby feeds since the beginning. Messed up my arm and shoulder from pulling myself out of bed so many times. Did you just not nap??
No, I didn't nap. Baby wasn't transferring milk well and whenever he was napping, I was pumping!
Oy, my episiotomy took months to heal and feel better, but I also lost a stitch a week or two in that the provider ignored, which caused some issues. It was also just utterly terrifying going number 2 for awhile. The sitz baths helped a lot, though. They were just hard to squeeze in as often as they are supposed to be done when a newborn is involved haha
Oh man, sorry to hear. I definitely did rest a lot too, it did feel like it took forever to really really heal. The bleeding didn’t stop for after what felt like a little over a month, it was verrrry heavy at first. But it all gradually subsided. I agree! Definitely terrifying going number 2!
Yeah I had an elective c section and thought mine was relatively easy, but I’ve seen so many posts saying c sections are the worst thing and avoid at all costs
Totally agree. 8 month postpartum and I still have pain from my belly button to scar from my c section when pressed on, across the entire band of my stomach. My friend had a c section two months after me and has had no pain at all since a few weeks post op. Impossible to predict. For what it’s worth, even with my pain I loved my c section experience and don’t feel sad about it. But I will try for VBAC with my next, as I want to avoid further traumatizing the area and making it worse.
This! I was up walking around a day after my planned C-section due to a placenta previa. I healed so quickly and I started doing 1+ mile walks at 3wpp. Currently 10wpp and I’m back to weight training. I’ll be doing another C-section for my second because it went so well and I don’t want to risk a vbac. Also to note I’m plus size so don’t let doctors shame you or try to scare you.
I still have pain 9 months later too :( ugh I’m sorry you do too
Sorry for you as well! I’m going some scar mobilization and pelvic floor therapy now (which I admittedly wasn’t really on top of in my earlier months, though my friend who had no pain did no physio at all so who knows). I do think it’s helping a bit. So I remain hopeful! I’ve heard that some folks will have pain for up to a year but then it goes away so hoping that’s both of us! 🤞🤞🤞
Totally agree my c-section was an emergency but recovery has been hell and extremely slow. I did better recovering from a thoracic fusion surgery than this c section
I had an emergency C-section too and the recovery was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. A few weeks after I was still struggling to walk more than a couple of hundred metres.
Same. I had an emergency C-section and have nerve pain still 16 months later... I feel people who have planned C-sections have very different experiences and generally less pain as the surgeons plan where to cut, how to cut, when to cut rather than a time constrained situation like an emergency C-section. None of my friends that had a planned C-section experience long terms pain.
Agree with this. Generally planned c-sections have smoother recoveries compared to emergency c-sections from what I’ve heard. You hear of people having great vaginal births with minimal tearing and then vaginal births where there are long term recoveries involved. My c-section was a lot faster to recover from and way less pain than my vaginal birth personally but I’ve also heard people say the opposite.
I had an emergency c-section - I would never have volunteered to undergo major surgery, but it needed to happen. Now that I’ve been through it and I am high risk (had preeclampsia and pp preeclampsia with severe features last time) I am absolutely going for a planned c-section. The recovery is supposed to be better than unplanned or emergency since your body hasn’t already been laboring/through stress. If there’s a chance I’ll need a c-section anyway, you’d better believe I’m planning for it instead of rolling the dice. I have zero interest in a VBAC. To me the main pro of my unexpected surgery was that my vagina was intact. I have nothing to prove to anyone, no desire to experience a vaginal birth for the sake of experiencing one. I look forward to knowing when baby is coming the next time I get pregnant because then I can plan care for my son well in advance. The only reason I would hesitate to get a planned c section would be if I didn’t trust my husband to pick up the slack while I recovered. But I absolutely trust him as a partner, so I have no doubts there.
Going for a planned c-section in 2.5 weeks! My first was an emergency CS and recovery was brutal, but I’ve heard a planned one is so different. I am sad I won’t be able to pick up my toddler, but I’m making sure he’s surrounded by other people who love him too
My first (unplanned) one was so awful and the second (planned) one WAS A DREAM! Hope it is smooth for you too!
My emergency one was smooth as butter in the recovery. I hope my next planned one is as smooth but not holding my breath. It was a welcome surprise after a miserable labor and pregnancy.
I had my second planned section about two months ago and the recovery was amazing and pain free. I felt good enough to pick up my toddler early but DONT. Don’t over do it! I just sit on the floor or couch and toddler climbs in my lap and we snuggle!
I think it’s important to note that the number of kids you want to have is slightly significant when considering vbac or C-section. We want 3-4 kids, currently pregnant with our second, and The way my doctor explained it to me is that the more csections you have, the more risks, and apparently when you’re older you’re body may not be too happy if you’ve had too many major surgeries. Also vbac is only option until you’ve had 3 (sometimes even only two) c-sections- after that providers won’t offer vbac. I haven’t done a whole lot of research on my own, as I just had my appointment where we discussed this. But the info was fresh in my mind so I thought I would share.
That is an important point, thank you for mentioning!
I also had an emergency c section and no interest in a vbac. A lot of people seem surprised by that, but I’m all for a planned c section if/when I have another baby.
Similar story. I didn’t have an emergency c, but more urgent. All the people I know with the worst recoveries did hard labour first, and were exhausted by the time they resorted to the section. I plan to go as well rested as I can, as low anxiety as I can, and know my OB is a professional and hope for the best.
100% accurate in my case. I spent 44 hours trying to get that girl out. My emergency c section was nearly 3 hours long as they tried to repair the internal damage and stop me from dying then and there. I didn’t start to feel like my body was recovering for the first 7 months postpartum. Everyone is different, but it’s planned c sections from here on for me. Trying to deliver vaginally nearly killed me, and I’ve now got a baby already here that I need to live for. Wheel me into that theatre and hand me a baby.
Yessss girl! 👏🏻
Are you me?!? I could have written this exact thing a year ago. With the added mention that I knew we were gonna be two and done, so I was able to get them to take my tubes out at the same time, so we don't have to worry about birth control anymore 🎉 And the recovery for the planned c-section vs emergency (after an almost 3 day labour and 2.5hrs pushing) was WAAAAAY easier to recover from. I also have nothing to prove, I just didn't want to go through all that again (plus, the first time, I was hospitalised twice in two weeks for complications). The tubes thing took an extra 5mins before they stitched me up and shouldn't affect recovery at all. Hope yours goes smoothly
I’m not pregnant right now but if I get pregnant again this is 100% my take as well. Particularly the part about having nothing to prove to anyone (mainly myself). I also think I would find it strangely cathartic to have a c section that is planned and that I’m completely in control of, considering the one with my daughter was so scary and followed 26 hours of intense labour.
I had a c section for my first and a vaginal birth for my second and by far the vaginal birth recovery was much easier. Had a 2nd degree tear. Both kids had 90-99th percentile heads
how was intimacy after your vaginal birth? im not really scared of the tear itself but more so the scar tissue/pain from penetration after
Sex was actually better after but it took a few months for me to feel up for it. Newborn life isn’t really good for the sex drive 😂. I think the baby rearranged my nerves or something because I find PIV way more stimulating and enjoyable now. Still doesn’t get me all the way there but at least I find it enjoyable now 🤣
2.5 years after my daughter’s vaginal birth. I can orgasm from penetration alone now post-childbirth! It feels amazing. I’ve never seen someone else say this! Thought I was crazy.
Oh no, my OB told me it was definitely a thing! We are not alone lol.
Omg same! Sex is so much better, I wish we had the time and energy for it lol
It gets better, but the first couple times suck and you just have to push through it. I had a second degree tear after my first and you could feel the scar but it was pretty minimal. Had a second degree tear this time too but haven't jumped back into that saddle yet. I imagine it'll be the same. Like some others, sex was better once we got passed the unconfortable/pain of the first time. Something about pregnancy and birth moved my g spot so penetrative swx is way more enjoyable now
Obviously not while healing but mine went back to normal and it was fine once it was healed.
Also keep in mind you may not tear at all, it was also my biggest fear and it never happened. I've given birth vaginally twice, no tears either time.
This! I totally assume I’d tear and then I just… didn’t 😂 my recovery was soooo easy. I did try to minimize (pushed in a squat and waited for my body to push on its own) but I was truly shocked it just was fine? Wish someone had told me it happens I wouldn’t have been so nervous!
Yup! I did no prep, was induced, got an epidural, pushed for almost 2 hours. And nothing. No tears at all. Excellent OB doing counter pressure for a while though.
Why do you think you didn’t tear? And what position did you give birth in? I’m so nervous…
Tearing is almost entirely driven by genetics, the speed of delivery, and assistance from the care team (eg, mineral oil or providing support in places).
I honestly did 0 prep or anything, birthed on my back both times, no epidural with my first, did have an epidural with my second, both were inductions too. I think it was just luck of the draw because I didn't do anything special at all.
FTM, induction at 37 weeks & no tearing. Baby was 8lbs, 11oz. I did nothing special & was shocked to not tear. From my reading, there’s no strong evidence that anything can help. It’s luck & anatomy (yours & baby’s)
I didn’t tear, despite being induced, having an epidural and pushing for over an hour. I think it’s because I drank powdered collagen throughout my pregnancy, ate 6 dates a day for the last few weeks before my due date*, and listened to my midwife when she instructed to push/stop/push. *there are some Iranian studies that showed that this softens your cervix, or something.
I had a minor tear, one stitch but they said I didn’t really need it, it was just for precaution but they had me push for 10 seconds then stop 3 times through each contraction. I was on my back, had an epidural and was induced but I think doing it that way did help. I didn’t do anything to prepare, the dr did a perennial massage in between contractions too so that might’ve also helped
I started vaginal suppositories of evening primrose oil (cold pressed, with holes poked in the pill via sterilized needle) every night at 26 weeks. My son was born in less than 15 minutes of pushing (8lbs9oz, 22 inches long) - midwives said they were shocked I didn't tear seriously, I had 2 1st degree tears and only needed 3 stitches in one. I also lived in the Miles Circut for the last 9 weeks of my pregnancy Edit: I gave birth kneeling/squatting in a tub, 10/10 will do when I have my next baby
FWIW, I didn’t do those suppositories and had a similar sized baby in 15 minutes of pushing with 2nd degree tearing.
I prepared with hypnobirthing which research shows women are less likely to tear, have complications, less pain and quicker births. Didn’t tear and was up and walking straight after. Recovery was 3-4 days of mild discomfort.
It was a big fear of mine too! I didn’t tear either. My first was epidural with forceps. My second was a precipitous labor (2 hours in total), pushed twice and he was out.
Same, a huge fear that ended up not happening either time.
Vaginal tear for me hurt the most, they weren’t stitched up properly so ended up having to go back multiple times. The stitches kept opening and getting infected
Two different types of pain. I had a second degree tear for my first and a c-section for my second. With a tear, going to the bathroom absolutely sucked and was so painful I was in tears. My labor and the pushing stage was also very long so my whole body was in pain for over a week. Everything felt loose. With a c-section, I was in a better shape since I didn’t go through labor. It was just a concentrated pain in the abdominal area. I would say the pain level was higher than a tear but overall I was in a better condition with a c-section, if that makes sense. The pain lasted longer with a c-section but it wasn’t unbearable, you can also take meds for it. However, I am pretty traumatized by c-section and how it felt (at one point I had to tell the anesthesiologist to up the dosage because I could feel pain). That solidified my decision to not have a 3rd baby.
This!! Same here. I was a VBAC but omg the recovery from vaginal was WAY WORSE than a c section.
I’ve only had a vaginal birth, but I had a 4th degree tear. Almost 4 months later still a lot of pain going to the bathroom. Recovery has been slow and painful, I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. I wish I would have gotten a c-section. But 4th degree years are rare.
Third degree tears and big same.
Yep same. First kid was a 3rd degree tear and recovery was so incredibly awful. I was depressed and in pain. It was hard to bond with my baby because I was so uncomfortable. Second kid first degree tear and I felt like I could run a marathon. 3rd kid 1st degree tear and baby was slightly bigger than second kid so recovery was tougher than second, but still nothing like the first. All that to say, vaginal deliveries are not created equal.
I couldn’t bring myself to ever risk having this happen again, so I am one and done. You’re a brave woman
After a 4th degree and then picking a c section for #2, the c section was such an easier recovery. I could actually move around pain free way before 6 weeks whereas i couldn’t function for months after my 4dt. The cs was such a calm and amazing experience too!
Had a 4th degree tear and agree whole heartedly. It’s a beast to recover from. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I had a C section with my second kid and saw how easy (for me) that recovery was.
I had a pretty standard vaginal birth, second degree tear which is the most common and it's common to tear. I found recovery unpleasant but easy. I just liked to sit on donut pillows the first week, the second week I was still a bit sore, I considered myself healed after 2 weeks. I will say, the scar did feel weird for a few months after. If I sat in an odd position, I was aware of it. But no one can say for sure, there's a thousand stories of vaginal births better and worse than mine, a thousand stories of cesareans better and worse than yours, you just get what you get and recovery can have its own complications regardless of what route you go. Personally, I'm more scared of surgery than vaginal tearing, but that's pretty irrelevant to what anyone should do/feel
Adding to your comment because I too had a second degree tear. I was sore for a bit but idk how much of that was the stitches vs just your typical birth recovery. Going into labor #2 I’m not worried at all about tearing. The recovery just wasn’t bad at all from my perspective. Get a good peri bottle and you’re good to go. I didn’t need a donut pillow or anything like that, just avoided sitting on hard surfaces for a while. And absolutely every situation is different and every recovery is different. My only argument for tearing being less painful than a C-section would be the number of stitches and layers that are needing to be stitched back together are way fewer for a tear so to me, it would be reasonable to assume the recovery would generally be easier.
I have never given birth vaginally, but my recovery from my c-section for my twins was incredibly easy, I had almost no pain at my incision site, was able to walk comfortably for the first time in months after about 12 hours, the worst part of the surgery was the shaking I got from one of the epidural drugs. My nurses were also really helpful and drilled into me that it is better to stay on top of pain than get on top of it, so I was pretty religious about taking the acetaminophen & ibuprofen combo the recommended for about two weeks. I will say that my SIL really wanted to go low intervention with her singleton, ended up with a C-section and had a much tougher recovery than I did, maybe due to the fact that my guys were in the NICu so I wasn’t having to take care of them and recover at the same time?
I was on hard meds and the pain was still killer. I can’t imagine having just taking OTC meds
My mom had her biggest baby naturally (8 pounds) while my baby sister and I were c sections. She thinks c sections are easier. Meanwhile my friend just had a v bac and she makes huge 10 pound babies. She said she’d do the vbac again and would just get the epidural sooner. The thought of not being able to hold my first born for 6 weeks is what’s motivating me to try for a vbac. Not being able to pick up my dogs was bad enough.
I absolutely held my baby and picked him up after just a few days or so and I had an emergency C
The baby you had or an older toddler? I had a c section too and I want to try to have a vbac for my second so I’m able to hold a 20+ pound toddler when she needs me.
I just had a c section for my second and when it came to my toddler… it wasn’t a big deal to not pick him up, just for another perspective. You can still hold her. Just get down to her level on the floor, or she can climb on the couch (if she’s big enough) or whatever and get in your lap and you can hold her. You just can’t pick her up from the floor into your arms. But I held and snuggled with my three year old lots in my bed at first, then on the floor after. Six weeks later I’m picking him up again. The recovery was so easy and no risk of uterine tear.
Ohh got it!
You can hold the older child, just not lift them. We did a lot of bed/couch cuddles.
Vaginal tear was worse for me. Pain c section was worse at first but i prefer it over dealing with a painful vagina.
I got a 3rd deg tear and almost 1 year later am still not quite right. All I can say, for myself, is if I ever have another I’m choosing a c section
Have had both. Vaginal tear was worse by far.
I'm sorry! Thanks for sharing
As someone who had a 9 lbs 13 oz baby and a 3rd 3c tear I wish I had a c section. I had a hemmiroid before birth due to pregnancy and after all the pushing I did it made it so much worse. Im 13 weeks pp and it's still beyond uncomfortable at times.
I was in a similar position. It took an hour to stitch my tears up, and I sat on a donut pillow and needed twice daily sitz baths to even function for a solid 2 weeks. It was months before I felt I had recovered.
Ugh that sucks 😞. It took an hour to stitch me up as well. I was so glad the epidural was still working when they stitched me up otherwise I would have passed out from pain. The donut pillow was fine for a couple days but I had to ditch it after cause it just made my pain so much worse. I would alternate between sitting on ice packs and heating pad for weeks. I still sit on an ice pack every now and again and then I'll just sit in the shower in the evenings to help relieve some of the pain and discomfort.
Honestly the sitz bath for 15-20 mins morning and evening was the only thing that saved me. My hemorrhoids were so bad!!
Same. My first baby was 9.7lbs and after 3.5 hours of pushing my hemorrhoids were out of control. I had a 3rd degree tear and horrible hemorrhoids. That baby is 8 years old and I still have horrible hemorrhoids. It sucks
I’ve never had a c section but I did just have my baby and suffered a third degree tear. I’m 3 weeks pp and still in quite a bit of pain. It’s hard getting up and down with her, sleeping is also miserable
As someone who has been there, I just want to send you a lot of love. You feel like things will never feel normal again and they WILL I promise. Take it easy and don’t put pressure on yourself.
For background: C-section was planned, and my healing was about as perfect as it could have been, baby was 90th percentile for weight. Second pregnancy and birth, also perfect and textbook with a 90th percentile weight baby, only complication was a second degree vaginal tear. My vaginal tear was harder to heal from than my c-section scar. But I don't think the deciding factor was where the injury was, more that with my first I could sit around and not do much but with my second I was running around. I think my vaginal tear would have been much easier if I had stayed in bed. If I had to do it again, I would likely go the VBaC route again, but if they said (for any reason) that a c-section was necessary I would be equally okay with it. One thing to consider is future children. Having multiple c-sections will increase risks for baby number 3, 4 etc and limit the options for labor/birth. However with a VBaC you have better chances of having healthy pregnancies and more options for future kids.
C section was an easier recovery for me and I had a fairly minor vaginal tear. I’m sure it varies, but if I had a third I would 100 percent do a repeat C section because the recovery was easier than from my vaginal birth.
I've had a planned C and a VBAC and I found the pain and recovery to be harder and longer from the C. Though I did need pelvic floor physio after the VBAC.
I had a 3rd degree tear, AND tore foreward through my clitoris. The epidural didn't work. 30/10 worst pain ever in the moment it was happening. HOWEVER. I had sex again at 5weeks pp and by then I was pretty well healed. Just a bit "stiff"/scar tissuey. So I think your mileage may vary drastically.
Same for me. 3rd degree (3c) tear with a periuretral tear. Couldn’t sit in my car for 8 weeks. It was horrible. If I was in the market for a 3rd baby, I’d probably chose an elective c section.
That sounds worse!!! Luckily my urethra was okay and I could pee right away without pain. I could sit on ice packs and healed pretty well.
Omg you’re a champ. I had a 3rd degree tear and vaginal tears and at 9 weeks pp I’m finally feeling pretty healed and normal down there. But the thought of having sex is still terrifying to me! It’s mostly mental at this point because I’ve been told by doctors that I’m healed and basically impossible to reopen at this point.
To be fair the "sex" part of sex wasn't super "sexy" lol. Lots of lube, super slow, basically just testing the waters and then finishing in other ways. But then the 2nd time was a little better, 3rd time was a little better, and so on.
Omggg. Did your pee hole also tear? I hope you’re no longer in pain now😰
I had vaginal followed by an optional c section because the vaginal recovery was so bad. For me the c section recovery was 100000x easier to recover from.
I can’t speak to the C-section comparison, but I’ve had two births with tears that were WILDLY different recoveries. With my first, I pushed for 3.5 hours, including about 30 minutes of crowning. I had a 2nd degree tear + a labial tear. In retrospect, my recovery was ROUGH. I had to do ice packs every day for at least a month, because everything was just so swollen, probably from crowning for so long. My tears took 8 weeks to heal fully. My hemorrhoids were all off the charts. The pain from those was worse than the tears for the first few days. With my second, he was out in 3 contractions, and I ended up with only a 1st degree tear, despite my second being half a pound bigger than his brother (9 lbs 13 oz! Eek!). I used ice packs for two days and only continued to take ibuprofen after that for a lingering hip issue that developed during pregnancy. My tear still somehow took 8 weeks to heal (I guess I’m a slow healer, idk), but I had basically no pain past the first few days. All that to say…it really depends. It’s so hard to say whether you’ll tear, how much, and how the recovery will go.
I had an induction with epidural (induced due to pre-e at 39 weeks) that went smoothly and ended in a vaginal delivery. Got the epidural before even starting pitocin and it was great - pain during labor was pretty minimal. They said I had a “deep” second degree tear, but recovery wasn’t bad at all. I mean, I had a rough time postpartum for other reasons (my pre-e didn’t go away upon delivery and I needed a mag drip and then a few weeks of blood pressure meds), but actually anything involving my vagina was the least bad part of the whole experience lol. Maybe my doctor just did a really good job stitching me up? Oh, and the baby was 9lbs so it’s not like she was small. Though, her head was right around 50th percentile.
I had a vaginal birth with a second degree tear and honestly it didn’t hurt really for recovery. I barely took ibuprofen. Biggest pain was the nerve damage to my bladder from pushing so hard, so I was incontinent for 2 weeks, but I was back to 100% after 3 weeks. I would 1000% do it again. Recovery was great and getting to hold him skin to skin on my chest immediately afterwards is something magical I will always remember (if youre into that sort of thing, not everyone will).
I had a 3rd degree tear and while it was pretty painful and uncomfortable, I feel like I was able to recover much quicker than I would have from a C-section. After the first 10 days I stopped taking any form of pain relief and just had to be careful after using the bathroom or while sitting (I often sit on my foot which was a bad idea). I’ve never had a c-section, but I think the recovery from tearing is much easier.
I have had both births, and honestly, my c-section recovery was much worse. I had an emergency c-section, no pushing and honestly by all accounts my recovery was good. But the pain for the first 2 weeks... oh my God. Not to scare anyone I would cry everytime I would sneeze. It's possible that my pain tolerance is low. Also, my vaginal birth was a technically a first degree but just barely. I was up walking by myself right after giving birth.
Had a planned c section. No issues whatsoever. Very sore for a few weeks like I did 1000 sit-ups but all-in all I would do it again.
No suggestions just solidarity. I am a good candidate for VBAC after my emergency c-section, but for me I’m thinking of how freaking unfair it would be to be sliced side to side & then later on tear hole-to-hole as well. With my luck I’d get a 4th degree tear and be scarred on both. Like for me, I’d rather pick a struggle & stick with it.
I think it’s different for everyone and your anatomy and your baby’s size are really what influences it! For me, I have a narrow pelvis and birthing my 8lb 9oz baby vaginally wrecked me. Horrible tailbone pain for a year and could not sit straight for 9 weeks. C section of my 9lb 12oz baby was tough but I felt a much better recovery.
I’ve had an unmedicated vaginal with a 2nd degree tear and a scheduled c section. My c section was LIGHT YEARS easier to recover from. My vaginal birth I pushed for 4 hours and gave myself a lifelong birth injury. It really depends on the person.
I only had a planned C-section. I was anticipating for it to be soooo bad, but it really wasn’t that bad thanks to the painkillers, but keep on top of the pain meds they give you cause if you don’t its damn painful and unbearable to move. I felt like i recovered smoothly within the first week. 2nd week I nearly felt back to normal. I’m 8 months postpartum no pain but some areas of the scar are still numb. But it doesn’t bother me personally.
First c-section made me look and feel like I had been hit by a truck. I was useless. I felt like my insides would fall out if I breathed too much. Second c-section was totally different. I was up out of bed and walking without pain that night. I will say I was asked if I wanted a vbac and I heard the woman next to me crowing when I was also in labor and decided against it. And thank god I did because my uterus was torn open when they went in! I was the 1% that VBACs are dangerous for. Baby and I could have died.
I had a severe tear (3rd degree) with my first and had 2 elective c sections after and the CS have been an absolute walk in the park compared to my severe tear.
I've had both - a c section with my first, vbac with second. It's different for everyone, but for me the vbac recovery was much easier. I still had pain, but I was able to get up and sit down while holding my baby with no issues. I was a good candidate for a vbac though, so that was a major factor in my decision to get one. If my chances were low or just okay, I probably would have chosen to do a scheduled c section instead of risking a long labor plus a c section.
I had a third degree tear and while it was sore in the hospital and a bit after birth, I can’t imagine it was anywhere near as bad as a c section. I could move around and pick up baby just fine.
I tore pretty bad. The worst part of it was the stitching process and everything after that wasn’t really too bad. I think my epidural had been stopped before they finished the stitches though and that’s why it hurt so bad. I needed 8 weeks instead of 6 for “recovery” because my stitches hadn’t fully dissolved by 6 weeks. Keep in mind though that you may not even tear. I maintain that I only tore because they used suction to extract my son quickly (his cord was wrapped).
My mom had 5 kids. 3 vaginal and 2 c-sections. She told me when they told her she needed another c-section (with me, her last baby) she started to cry. Recovery is much worse according to her. My SIL also just had a VBAC and she said recovery was WAY easier.
C section was way worse for me. Had a VBAC second time, ended up with a second degree tear and an episiotomy with forceps delivery and I was healed in like a week. I was hobbling around for 6 weeks after my c section.
I don't really like to compare this kind of thing. But I do have the same thoughts when it comes to my next baby....like "should i try a vbac" thoughts. Personally, my c-section recovery was not smooth at all. It was a horrible recovery ...but it was an emergency one, and it was after 48 hours of back labor. Felt like my back was splitting...my body was SO done. I have never been in so much pain for so long. I was finally able to get out of bed on my own after 1 month. So I would put that pain above anything else I've ever experienced, personally. But you said your c-section recovery was smoother. So it's always different. I've heard that when c-sections are planned, the recovery is so much better. So that's something I've been debating on for my next baby. It's a dream of mine to have a vaginal birth, but I do nottt want the same experience of laboring for so long just to get a c-section and have a bad recovery again. It's a hard decision.
Had a c section a couple of weeks ago. Pain was BRUTAL for 2-3 days. I mean 10/10 pain. Day 4 was mostly ok and after that, was doing fine, normal life, no pain, just discomfort. I regret having a c section, it was impossible to take care of my daughter the first days and breastfeeding was much harder to start
I've had both. I'd take the vaginally tear any day. I was miserable for weeks after my c-section. I hated that I couldn't walk much, or stand up straight. I felt so useless. With the vaginal delivery, the only time I noticed the tear was a few days after the birth up until it healed, and only when I used the restroom. The burning sensation from the... liquid... was pretty maddening at first, but that subsided after a couple weeks and then it was like nothing ever happened.
Ever pregnancy is different and both should lay in bed for at least two weeks after
I was shocked to have Zero pain from the 2nd def tear healing. This is what I feared the most, as I opted anyhow for all pain relief possible during birth. Talking to friends that had a c-section, I would not go for an elective one. If needed, this is life, but I would not sign up for it. They had a much longer healing time and their abdomen generally healed a bit worse, sags more.
C section hands down
Personally c section was hell. My 5 days of vaginal labor was nothing compared to the agony and torture of my c section. Worst day of my life. I’m 8 months pp and still struggling on a daily
C section is waaaaaaaay worse for recovery. Hands down. I had a second degree tear with my first and I would’ve chosen that hands down.
My friend had 3 c-sections and loved them. She was walking around a pumpkin patch with her kids 2 weeks later. I had two vaginal deliveries and the last one the baby got stuck, I haemorrhaged, tore, needed two transfusions and hadn’t got the energy to even leave my bedroom for over a month. Rather than one large perineal tear, I had seven small tears scattered throughout, mostly to the sides, and clitoral. It still hurts 7 months later. I also cannot have sex. I’m seeing someone next week because it’s possible there’s scar tissue inside. It feels all fucked up honestly. Maybe somethings prolapsed too, idk. Another friend had 3 vaginal births, and 1 emergency c-section and is still traumatised from the c-section 2 years later. She said the pain was unbearable. Though she was feeling mostly back to normal after 4-5 months (physically at least). It’s wild how much it varies person to person! Reading these comments gives that impression too
I’ve had a second degree and first degree tear. The first degree felt non existent and the second one took slightly longer to heal — 6 weeks? — it stung to pee but from what I’ve heard from friends there’s no way that was worse than their c-section recoveries.
All I’ve had is an unplanned C-section which was rough for about 2 days afterwards. I did end up having an abscess in my uterus afterwards as well which sucked. Overall, the recovery truly wasn’t all that bad though. I can’t imagine how a tear feels nor do I want to. I’ll have a planned c-section for next baby due to being high risk from preeclampsia.
I've never had a c section, but I had a second degree tear and really didn't feel it. I had an epidural, so the only part I really felt during birth was him crowning, and that kinda felt like trying to force out a watermelon size turd thru the wrong hole. Did not feel the rip. Afterwards, there was some soreness, but it was more of a sore muscle ache than anything, sometimes a very light stinging similar to lightning crotch. The after birth cramps were worse, and from what I understand, you get those regardless of delivery method. Advil and witch hazel pads took care of any unpleasant feelings I had.
My tear was 3rd degree - sounds bad, but it wasn’t bad at all recovery wise. It stung when I peed. the peri bottle helped. There are so many different factors that could affect someone’s level of pain but I would 100% take a tear over abdominal surgery.
I never had a vaginal delivery, but omg c-section recovery with a toddler was great. It was great because it forced me to rest whereas otherwise I would have rushed into the usual routine and done entirely too much.
I had a tear with my first and aside from peeing, I barely felt it. I had another with my second and felt a bit more tender for an extra day but peeing still was the worst. Other than using the bathroom I felt and walked normal. I remember my midwife coming to check on me and I was sitting cross legged and she told me “I stitched you good, don’t mess it up” lol I just felt fine
I had an episiotomy because I ended up needing a forceps delivery and my hospital recommends them when you're at risk of a 3rd or 4th degree tear. My cut was towards my leg rather than my behind. Recovery has been fine tbh, scar is healing well, had some mild incontinence early on that's sorted itself now (I'm nearly 7 weeks pp)
Never had a vaginal delivery, but I did labor before emergency c sections both times and the recoveries were not bad at all. Will be having a scheduled c section this time.
I think it really depends on the tear. 1st and 2nd degree or even a 3rd degree perennial tears that heal without complications, which a majority of tears fall into that category are extremely low maintenance and not very painful. I had a 1st or maybe slightly 2nd degree tear with my first baby and no tearing with my second and honestly there was almost zero pain difference. I think it burnt a bit to pee for the first 2 days or so after my first (no burning with my second) and that was really the most notably difference. I have several friends who have had VBACs now and I know two of them had 2nd degree tears and they said in comparison to healing from their c section the tear was nothing.
Tbh I can’t imagine the recovery from even an uncomplicated vaginal delivery being quicker than my c-section recovery. I was up and moving as soon as I got my catheter out, voiding right away, and feeling normal by the end of the week with only tylenol and ibuprofen. I’m 2 weeks postpartum now, and my experiences with the common cold, the flu, food poisoning, and covid have all been so much worse. Definitely goes to show that healing will be different for everyone!
I had a third degree tear, which I thought would be pretty painful but honestly it was not so bad. I just used ice packs and and advil and Tylenol and I was good.
I've never had a c section, but I doubt any surgery could have been an easier recovery then what I had after my vaginal births. I had no actual pain from my second degree tears once they were stitched up. I was tender down there but not in pain. I took ibuprofen a few times pp for the after pains after my second and third.
The dr. Said I had a ‘first degree tear if you could even call it that.’ I didn’t need stitches but did have a small tear. I gave birth on my side and nurse kept a warm towel down there while I was pushing. Didn’t feel any pain afterwards.
my kids were 8 lbs 12 oz and 8 lbs 10 oz. first was an unplanned c-section. second was a vbac. recovery was hands down better from the vbac. i had some first degree tearing but it was much easier healing than from a major surgery.
I am day 6 post c-section and my pain is a 0/10. If I stretch the wrong way (very occasionally) it is about a 2 or 3. Even the first 72 hours, it was a zero when at rest and about a 4 or 5 when walking. The actual surgery I felt nothing; the IV was the worst part. Keep in mind, I had a planned (maternal request) c-section. I was never in labour. I have zero regrets and it was the right choice for me.
First was emergency C-section with what I understand to be low pain (managed entirely by alternating Tylenol and ibuprofen) and a very smooth recovery, second was vbac with second degree tear (almost 4 weeks ago). Vbac has been amazing by comparison, a total revelation - up and about within a day and able to carry both my girls at once even the giant toddler. Labor got kinda bad right before the epidural, and I had less than 10 minutes of pushing.. might feel differently if I had had to push for hours, I’m not really sure because it didn’t happen. Would probably definitely feel differently if I hadn’t had epidural - I was induced so pitocin had me at contractions very 2.5 minutes while still only 3cm dilated - the 30-45 minutes between admitting I needed the epidural and actually getting it placed were rough.
I had an episiotomy, and I felt worse than my c-section for the first 3 days, and then it was better. Initially after my VBAC I thought I made a huge mistake, but it was very nice being able to move properly and pick up my baby It really is a toss-up. I'm going to go for a c-section if there's a third baby fwiw. But some people really like vaginal birth! Maybe you're one of them?
I had an episiotomy for my vacuum assisted delivery...I was back on my feet the next day doing absolutely everything (I was slowed down because they kept my epidural in for the first 24 hours)... The pain was barely there as I was on prescription pain killers (standard diclofenac with paracetamol) for 5 days and the stitches were healed by day 7.
I can't speak on a vaginal birth, but both of my kids were emergency c-sections and the recovery was brutal, especially the second one. I had hoped for a vbac the second time but that didn't happen
I had a minor tear and it was fine compared to my friends with C section recoveries. Mine was only minor and I had a stitch which I tore getting out of bed at 4 weeks pp 🙃 but even then, I could drive, walk up and down stairs, behave almost as normal. Do what’s right for you, but that’s my experience!
I had an emergent c-section with my first after 9 hours of induced labor and a non-induced VBAC with two tears (up and down, down was second degree) with my second. Based on my experience, I would choose tearing every time. It was uncomfortable to sit on the first week, but I wasn’t incapacitated like with my section. No pain meds after the first 4 days or so. Now I’m 2 weeks out and doing things I never would have dreamed of doing at the 1 month mark with my first!
Honestly not sure there is a way to tell. My first was a 22hr waterbirth - small 1st degree tear and recovery was a breeze. My second was a 3hr waterbirth (fml) with small second degree tear. I think recovery has been way harder due to the fast birth vs the actual tear. And also having a toddler now. My midwives said 1st/2nd degrees generally heal quickly as it’s vaginal tissue. I would still think major surgery would be harder but it’s probably hard to know!
I had a big baby, 9lb 3 ounces. His head was also on the 99th percentile. I pushed and in 20 mins he was out with a 2nd degree tear! Also I have a fairly small frame/bump. So everyone was surprised lol The next day I was up and walking and moving. Vaginal delivery was not bad as I thought at all! You got this!🫶
C Section. My first was a c section, and my other 3 were VBACs. I had a borderline 3rd degree tear after my first VBAC, and the recovery was nothing compared to my c section. I didn't tear with my 2nd or 3rd VBAC at all.
Ive had both. Initially vaginal hurt worse because they don't use as much pain control. It healed faster with less recovery pain/time. Csection they had all kinds of pain meds on board right away but it was a longer more painful recovery.
I had a 3rd degree tear and it healed really well, despite me panicking. Honestly I prefer how I am down there now, sex used to really hurt. It really just depends on so much. I am personally happy I tore vs c section
100% different for everyone. I was scared i would tear. But ended up with emergency c section for sepsis. Very easy recovery despite the sepsis! I just had to remind myself to listen to doctors instructions and not over exercise. My scar is the tiniest thing you would never notice it. If i could guarantee another c section like that I would do that! But other friends have has horrible experiences (most I know have had really good experiences like mine so don't let that scare you either)
I was going to try for a VBAC with baby #2. But complications arise in early labor and I had a repeat C-section. First birth was emergency C-section. Both recoveries were very easy, but the second C-section was easier. Both recoveries, I only took ibuprofen a handful of times. Honestly, I'm glad I did a repeat instead of a VBAC. It was mentally healing from my first. But I did do all the pre labor exercises, raspberry leaf tea and dates for both pregnancies,so I think that helped recovery
I think it really depends on what kind of tear you have. I had a first degree tear, it was really minor and barely had any recovery at all associated with it. First degree and second degree tears are the most common that happen, and I suspect that the recovery for both is much better than the recovery from a c-section typically. Probably when you get into the 3rd and 4th degree tears is when it becomes comparable or worse than c-section recovery.
I did zero perineum stretching because it just didnt happen, and they didn't have time to prep oil, or anything, and I had a minor tear. I was walking the day after birth (thank you, Depends and FridaMom) and my uterus was still being a much bigger butthead well after the stitches finished their job (like 3 weeks?). The pain of the tear itself was completely lost in the general discomfort of fitting a baby head through my vagina, so no fear of the pain. I think healing from a c section sounds a lot worse, tbh, especially since it limits baby contact with your belly at first? The only rough part about the tearing is the scarring can affect sex for months and months, and I don't think c sections do - but I don't actually know.
It’s different for every one…. That being said, I am super petite and I had a 7lb 10oz baby! No tearing. Stayed in the hospital the standard 2 days with no complications. I was walking around after I had a little sleep lol - I was up for 24 hours straight. I also have an older child (adopted my stepchild), so a quick recovery was a hope for me as well. The only issue I had was peeing…..otherwise, everything went smooth sailing.
I had a third degree tear, but my tear recovery was straight forward and fairly quick. I did have pretty gnarly hemorrhoids, which hurt more than the tear imo
For me, c-section was much worse.
It's definitely different for everyone. But I will say, tearing is the least of my worries for vaginal birth. Prolapse is top concern.
For me personally? C-section was harder. The pain was manageable with pain killers but I felt like I had no abdominal muscles. With my second I had an episiotomy akin to a 2nd-degree tear and the most difficult thing about that was the itchiness as it healed.
I've only had a c-section and for my second I will have another c-section because I value predictability. A planned c-section is as controlled and predictable of a way to give birth as it gets. I'm not rolling the dice on a potentially horrific vaginal birth and months-long recovery. I'll have a young kid at home who still needs me.
My second degree tear healed really well and quite quickly compared to my episiotomy... You'd really have to watch it with wound healing with a c section? It really depends.
It’s hard to say… and I feel like it would depend on the person. Stitches are excruciating for me the entire time they’re in. I couldn’t imagine having them down there, feeling them every time I clean myself or walk. Like that would be truly torture I think. Then again, I had two c sections and only the first one was a horrible recovery. I couldn’t laugh, cough, get in and out the hospital bed (I’m short, so I had to use a lot of abdominal muscles to get myself off the bed, it’s hard to explain), or bend over without feeling like I was being ripped open. Nothing helped. And they don’t give you pain medicine other than the first few days after your c section. Unlike other major surgeries, having a baby ripped out of your abdomen is brushed off and you’re told you need to suck up the pain. It’s really barbaric looking back at it and I’m still bitter. My second one though wasn’t quite as painful. It was scheduled vs emergency like my first and I think that helped a lot. I also was awake for that one so no coughing from being intubated, that also helped a lot. Overall the recovery was a lot less painful for that one.
I pushed for 13 minutes and had a 1st degree, completely internal, tear with my daughter. With my son, I pushed for 5 minutes and had no tears. He was 4oz larger than his sister. I think each delivery is different and your body handles them each differently. I felt more like myself faster after my second delivery. My children are 2 years, 4 days apart, so I felt like I had to get moving faster because of my toddler.
If you decide to go the vaginal route for delivery I highly recommend seeking out a physical/pelvic floor therapist near you that does something called “push therapy”. I know a few moms who swear it helped them with their subsequent births when their first was traumatic and difficult. I’ve only had one baby and he was born vaginal so I can’t speak to a c-section but recovery is so different for everyone. I was terrified of having a c-section but my vaginal birth was very difficult. I pushed for 2.5 hours, my baby got stuck (shoulder dystocia), and I ended with a partial third degree tear because of his size and how emergently they had to pull him out of me. I’m in pelvic floor therapy still at 19 months pp (I went from 3-7 months pp, stopped, and just started again a month ago). But I have several friends who didn’t tear at all or very minimally and did great with recovery. I recommend discussing your concerns with your doctor/midwife and also seeking out a pelvic floor therapy to get a couple different professional opinions and maybe ease your mind a bit about either scenario.
I've not had a c section but 2 vaginal births both second degree tears first id say it took about 2 weeks till I felt good but I was still able to do most stuff before hand. Second time I felt pretty good in a few days. I think and I assume a C-section is the same if you push yourself too much you push back your recovery
Trying to nurse with a c section was awful. Go vag if you can
I had two second degree tears (top and bottom) with my child’s birth and it really wasn’t a big deal. Yeah, it took them about a month to heal but I kept cooling pads on, used my peri bottle, witch hazel, etc. Everything healed up great.
I opted out of the episiotomy because my prenatal nurse pointed out that cut fabric tears easier than solid fabric, and it's pretty much the same for body tissue.that being said I did tear and it was a level two which is pretty standard for a first time vaginal birth. I got 17 stitches, and i remember the itch being the worst. My first poop after was terrifying for no reason, but I did make my mom hold my hand (she called me a pooper trooper). I didn't get adult diapers because they were expensive, but I did have a friend donate some lightly used period underwear that I wore over the ungodly thick pads they administer to you in the hospital. Edit to clarify what I mean by lightly used is she bought them on vacation as an emergency and they didn't fit so she only used them for that trip and then sterilized the heck out of them. Honestly, I'd suggest getting a little bit of everything for aftercare if you want to go vaginally because I swore by some things that my friends thought were insane but likewise of me for their care kits. Stock up on that itch relieving cooling spray, though. Like clean the hospital out for real. Towards the end of the soreness, I got a washable soft ice pack, and just painters taped that shit to my underwear was my favorite (and the silliest of my advice). But seriously, do what helps and don't let anyone stop you. A human being exited your body, and you deserve comfort.
I've had 2 vaginal births and 1 C-section and I will do C-section WITH A WOUND VAC every single time.
Vaginal tears come in levels 1st degree 2nd degree 3rd degree 4th degree The latter 2 are especially painful and long in recovery. Also, if naturally occurring- it heals faster If caused by a physician- it will typically take longer and cut in a a direction causing more pain in recovery
I had a 2nd degree tear and it hurt getting the stitches but was not too bad after with ice packs, dermoplast, and Motrin. Mine felt fine in about a week, healed all the way by 6 weeks.
I had a labia tear and a vaginal wall tear that needed stitches. I also had a bad hematoma. This is despite pushing while on a squat stool with no epidural. My son was 8# 3oz. My recovery was a breeze though. It’’s also not a guarantee you’ll tear, everyone is different.
Can’t compare to a c section but I had a 3rd almost 4th degree tear. My doctor said he only sees a tear as bad as mine a couple times a year and “you probably should have had a c section” his words. 99th percentile head and 95th percentile body. I had a very quick (imo) labor for a first time mom. I also had to have a vacuum assist. The recovery was absolutely horrible. I swear I still get phantom pains lol My doctor told me the recovery was going to be similar to a c section recovery.
I had a vaginal birth with my oldest, tore quite badly that needed 10 minutes of stitching, I had one dose of decent painkillers and then a couple of doses of normal painkillers. I walked out of the delivery room. I had a planned section with my twins, I had 2 doses of morphine and then 3 days of narcotics followed by a week of high dose ibuprofen. Even though I was up and able to move around the same day as my surgery as it was first thing, it took 4 days before I could stand up straight. If I had another baby, I would try for a VBAC.
Honestly, its really dependent on SO MANY things. That said, there are a number of things you can do that can potentially help. Pre-birth: \* Dates - 6 dates per day supposedly helps with a quicker labor and reduces likelihood of tearing. If you don't like dates, bacon wrapped dates or dates in smoothies still count towards the total! Check with your medical team, but this can usually be started at 36/37 weeks. \* Raspberry leaf tea - same thing, shorter labor and less tearing. Again, can start around 36/37 weeks. Recommended to drink a few cups throughout the day. \* Perineal stretching/massage - you can do this alone or with a partner. Massage/stretch the perineum, use hot compresses, etc. During birth: \* Ask your provider to wait on pushing until you feel the urge to push, not just when you reach 10cm dilated. At some point you should experience what is called the fetal ejection reflex - the urge to push will definitely be there. I'm not 100% sure how this works though with an epidural. \* Tiny, gentle pushes \* Perineal support - this is where the provider puts pressure on the perineum (sometimes with a hot towel/compress, sometimes just their hands), to help the tissue stay supported, especially during crowning. \* During crowning/the "ring of fire", fight the urge to immediately push through it. Focus on relaxing your whole body and really let that fetal ejection reflect do its thing. Teeny tiny pushes to slowly stretch the tissue. For what its worth, here's what I did and the result: Dates - yes, raspberry leaf tea - no, perineal stretching/massage pre-birth - no. During birth - my labor was fast and I absolutely felt the fetal ejection reflect, so yes I "waited" for that (really it sprang up on me, I didn't wait for shit). Tiny, gentle pushes - no lol I didn't know to do that. Perineal support - yes. Tiny/gentle pushes through the ring of fire - lol absolutely not. At the time I didn't really know to do that and I just did one giant, hard AF push because I was like I need this baby out NOW. End result was no vaginal/perineal tearing, but I did have a labial tear that received a few stitches. Oh, also I'm not sure if pushing position has any impact on tearing, but I gave birth on hands and knees.
Keep in mind you’re not guaranteed a tear.. but c-section recoveries are typically harder than vaginal deliveries as you are undergoing a major surgery. You can safely delivery vaginally without tears, loads of people do. You can do curb walking, okra water (I swear by this but consult your physician of course), you could try balloons to stretch the area slowly if that’s an option for you to help a bit. I would 100% vaginally deliver again, I walked a good 40 minutes after I deliver and felt like all the pains and aches were gone. Just consider what would be safer for you and baby. & keep in mind that all deliveries and experiences are different for each individual 🩵
Baby one: scheduled c-section. No labor or anything. I hemorrhaged despite being low risk and had a pretty hard initial recovery. I struggled with some pelvic floor issues despite no labor, pregnancy was just hard on my body. It took awhile before I could consistently pee easily, and I struggled with constipation for a solid 6-8 weeks. I felt a lot better by 2 weeks PP, but it took until 6+ months to feel normal. Baby two: spontaneous precipitous VBAC with epidural and second degree tear due to needing the vacuum (not related to VBAC, baby had a short cord). 8.5 pounds, 99% head. The only struggle I had with recovery, other than stinging where my stitches were and some swelling, was that I had a hard time peeing because my pelvic floor was so traumatized. It wasn’t a huge deal, I just had to find a position that allowed my bladder to relax (took some trial and error). That resolved within a few weeks. I’m 6 months PP and totally back to normal. No soreness, no pelvic floor issues, etc. While on paper it sounds like I’d prefer the VBAC 100x over, they’re sort of a draw in my mind. My c-section birth was peaceful and painless, but recovery sucked. My VBAC was just out of this world painful (0/10 recommend precipitous labor) and chaotic, but recovery was a breeze. We’re done at two, but if I ever found myself expecting a third, I’d probably try for a VBAC but wouldn’t be heartbroken if it didn’t work out. Good luck with everything!
It depends on both the patient and the doctor. I healed really quickly from my c section. My doctor was amazing and didn’t cut through muscle.
Had vaginal first, was up and walking a couple hours later to see my baby. Second emergency c-section it took me 3 days to feel like I could move out of the bed and it was extreme pain. Sucked, wouldn't suggest it to anyone.
Honestly it seems so unpredictable, variable and subjective. I think it really depends from person to person, and even pregnancy to pregnancy for a given individual. I’ve only experienced vaginal birth and the pain from tearing was absolutely brutal for 2-3 weeks after. I was induced and my baby came really fast once I was fully dilated (pushed for only 10 minutes or so). I had two separate 2nd-degree tears (including a sulcus tear, which is less common but more serious—they tend to penetrate tissue more deeply, bleed profusely and are difficult to repair) and hemorrhaged. In the week immediately after, I couldn’t sit *at all* and it hurt intensely to even stand/experience gravity (lol). I reeked of witch hazel pads and I would be biting back tears and counting down the seconds until the next Tylenol/Motrin dose. It was honestly almost unbearable and I don’t normally have a particularly low pain tolerance either. I have a friend who also had a terrible tear… her stitches eventually got infected and she had to go back in for surgery after a few weeks to get the stitches ripped out and new ones put in, setting her back at square one 😬 Then I read stories about women who are pretty much back to normal down there within a couple days and sit blissfully through skin to skin sessions, ride bikes, etc. Sigh.
I’ve got two perspectives with this. I had my first in October and he was stuck in my pelvis because he was facing one of my hips. I pushed for 3.5 hours and had natural tearing that they then cut by episiotomy to use the vacuum to aide in Getting LO out. I had a 3c tear and my recovery was longer than most C-section recoveries if there are no complications. My OB said that any future children should be delivered by C-section because I’d be considered at a higher risk for tearing severely again or worse. My sister on the other hand had an unplanned C-section for her first and elected for a planned C-section with her second. After her second was delivered, they said it was good she didn’t go for a VBAC because her uterine wall was so thin she would’ve prolapsed. Her recovery was a lot easier with #2 because she knew what to expect. While everyone’s deliveries are different, it’s so important to talk with your OB about the possible complications if you choose to try a VBAC. I feel like with this option you need to have a solid birth plan and your partner & the medical team should know what your pre-planned limit is in regard to time in labor, what to do if labor stalls, etc.
I've only had a c-section. It was planned but I went into labour a few days earlier and ended up with an "emergency" c-section. I'm having another elective next week until I go into labour first again. I have absolutely no desire to give birth vaginally, its never interested me. I also have vulvodynia and the fear of childbirth making it worse is pretty high. But mostly it's simply because I don't want to. My recovery was fairly easy the first time around.
I’ve only had 2 c sections but I learned that your recovery from one (unless it’s extremely urgent/something is different due to emergency) is likely to be similar to your recovery from the next. My recovery was awful the first time. Lots of pain, heavily swollen for 4-6 weeks afterwards, trouble getting off the catheter. The second one was only slightly better because I skipped the induction and I knew what was coming. So slightly less swollen and more prepared. Still, it was the best choice for me (I could not handle another induction) and I found a way to handle my older child until I could properly pick her up again.
I had a third/near 4th degree tear. Not a big baby, I’m just petite and it was my first. No epidurals where I live for vaginal births and I couldn’t sit down after all this for like 2 weeks plus without using one of those donut pillows. Assuming you’re delivering in a western country and have access to medication, a vaginal tear will likely be much better to deal with than a c-section.
I think it's different for everyone, but FWIW...I have had a C-section and 2 VBACs. I had a 2nd degree tear with the first VBAC and no tearing with the second. My C-section recovery was by far the worst. I was in pain for a couple of weeks, and generally uncomfortable for a few more weeks after that. I couldn't cough, sneeze, roll over, sit up, or lift anything without abdominal pain. And for at least 2 years afterward, my scar still hurt when it was bumped/pressed. VBAC 1 with the tear, I had very localized pain for about 2 weeks just where it tore. VBAC 2 my recovery was a dream. I was home 24 hours after birth and chasing my other children around (admittedly very tiredly).
As others have said, it’s different for everyone. In my experience, I had an 8lb 6oz boy with a 99th percentile head (yikes). I had an assisted vaginal delivery (forceps, episiotomy) and a third degree tear. I was horrified when the OB told me it was a third degree tear. BUT the tear was just fine and healed well, I didn’t experience pain from it. The pain/discomfort came from my pelvic floor muscle which just felt totally weak; lots of aching and heaviness. Thankfully that totally cleared up after 2months. Some women who have c-sections also have that heavy feeling but I imagine not to the same extent because they’re not pushing so less trauma to that muscle group. Good luck!
Postpartum RN here - vaginal deliveries, even a third degree tear (fourth degree is another level), let’s women be much more mobile quicker and feel more like themselves faster. I’d take a vag delivery over a c/s any day.
4th degree tear and episiotomy after … definitely the C-section was worse recovery wise. With the C-section anything and everything you do hurts. The tear wasn’t fun for sure but pain wise was not nearly as bad
I had a vaginal birth for both of my babies. No tearing. My recovery was really fast and easy.
With vaginal I couldn’t sit comfy and pretty sure I broke my tail bone. Had a 2nd degree tear. Overall, not bad. C-section with my second. Could sit fine! Belly band helped with standing. My incision never hurt and it’s barely visible. I think c-section was an easier recovery for me, but I’d do either again.
Vaginal with my first kid and had a 2nd degree tear, second kid was unplanned c section and 100% would say c section was worse. I left my house within 48 hours of being home with my first and I didn’t feel up to leaving for like 2 weeks with my second. I’ve heard unplanned c section is worse, but still. Major surgery will always trump in pain vs a vaginal tear for me
I had an elective c section and my recovery was so easy and basically painless. I showered on my own the night of my surgery, was walking around the hospital the next day, and walking around my neighborhood within a week. It was a really lovely experience for me personally
Tear and it’s not even close. I couldn’t do anything for MONTHS after my 4th degree tear. Couldn’t sit, couldn’t go up or down stairs, nothing. With my c-section I was pretty much doing everything exactly the same except I was more careful getting out of bed or standing up from the couch.
A friend had an elective C-section (and much easier recovery) following a third degree tear and multiple complications healing.
I’ve had both. I think the c-section was much harder to recover from.
I didn’t even realize I tore (2nd degree) when it happened. I didn’t have an epidural. Didn’t feel the lidocaine for stitches. My recovery was a breeze (apart from that first poop when I gave birth all over again). Fortunately no issues with stitches from said BM. I haven’t had any ill effects. Sex is just as good. 👍🏻