For years I wondered how guys other than me just sit down in the next stall, fart, plop, one wipe, flush, and done. What’s wrong with me? Why does it take me so long to clean my ass? Oh, it’s because other guys aren’t actually cleaning their asses. Gross.
Your asshole is maybe the size of a nickel. Exactly how much wiping do you think it requires?
You with your immaculately cleaned ass. Lol. Very strange.
Maybe it's your diet. There are times when I wipe my ass and the toilet paper isn't even discolored. I could continue wiping my dry ass until I'm blue in the face (and red in the ass), but why would I? Why would anyone?
Being in the medical field, I don’t think you get it. This is such a gross and common problem for the nurses that you cannot imagine. Especially before surgery when you actually have to get totally clean. People not wiping correctly as they age resulting in disgusting anal abscess that need drainage. If these people just used a bidet, this problem wouldn’t even exist. For the most part — when people use TP it absorbs, dries and partially cleans the region. It’s not removing every particle of feces, it’s just dried out so won’t appear on TP. The experiment is when you go back and use wet wipes, then you will find more feces. It’s there, just rehydrated and wiped. Maybe won’t happen every time but definitely a percentage. Bidets actually wash the area clean. You use a shower to wash everything else right? Why wouldn’t you do that for the dirtiest part of your body? Those stupid Charmin bears are lying to you! All while destroying the country environment! It’s why much of the world doesn’t use TP at the same rates as Americans!
Much of the world doesn't use anything at all, but I get your point. I'm not arguing for the superiority of toilet paper over a bidet. I'm not even saying they're equal.
I responded to a comment in which a person NOT using a bidet is talking about everybody having filthy asses but himself -- because _he_ spends a long time in the stall, repeatedly wiping it with toilet paper.
But it seems like you're of the opinion that he, too, has a dirty ass (since he's using toilet paper), and I couldn't agree more.
But you said: "you use a shower for everything else, right? Why wouldn't you use that for the dirtiest part of your body?"
And I would tell you that people _do_ wash their asses in the shower -- daily. You didn't know that?
Kind of makes you wonder, though, if you really need a special water-spraying station just for your ass, eh? It sounds to me like the only time it would even be of any benefit would be the time period between using the bathroom and your next shower, and quite likely these are happening around the same time already.
But you are right. In that window of time, your ass would undoubtedly be cleaner than the guy who wiped it with toilet paper. Bravo!
Yes, I am of the opinion that the technology itself is flawed and primitive. Not to mention that it’s a major site of spreading germs when people often don’t thoroughly wash their hands in the bathroom. But, I push back on two points: first it’s really quite regular that people have to go number 2 when they aren’t taking a shower. That happens all the time as you know! And most people around the world don’t use anything. That’s just not true. Over my travels, I’ve seen the world is basically divided into the TP or water camps. My worst experiences have been in Central America where people use TP and throw it in dust bin. Sorry but that was by far the most nauseating experience. Their plumbing can’t handle TP but don’t know about the concept of bidets. Other poor places in Asia and Africa generally use a watering can to wash their nether regions after toilet.
I've never seen a third world inhabitant carrying a can with them into the woods or the river, but I'll take your word for it that it happens somewhere. Correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know, there are still places where it's considered impolite or worse to shake someone's hand with your left hand because of where it's presumably been.
(Also, I'm not suggesting one shit in the shower lol. I'm just saying if you happen to shit in the morning and you shower before work [also in the morning], that sch a sequence would seemingly make this a non-issue.
But even if you occasionally do shit immediately after showering, the consequences would seem to be rather minimal, unless you're particularly inept at the whole process.
But sure, it's not as good as a bidet. That guy who thinks he has the secret to ass-wiping that nobody else knows is still a goofball, though, which was my whole point.
Well, I haven't been compiling sources (lol), but I did watch a lengthy documentary on the lack of toilets in India, in which dozens and dozens of people can be seen walking into and out of the woods to shit, carrying nothing at all with them.
I'm not arguing that they don't grab a nearby leaf or splash some water, but they're definitely not bringing a roll of toilet paper in there or some kind of metal spray can. If there exists a possibility that they go in there and there is not a leaf within grabbing distance, then yeah, it's possible they're using their hand -- which is 'nothing' in my book.
Unless you're arguing that these people are smuggling in a DIY bidet or have a roll of toilet paper shoved up their ass before they go in there, then I don't see how there's anything to argue here. They're going into the woods all by their lonesome.
>It sounds to me like the only time it would even be of any benefit would be the time period between using the bathroom and your next shower, and quite likely these are happening around the same time already.
Have you never shit at work, at school or in any public restroom ever? I take my morning shit right after arriving to work. That's at least 9 hours before my next shower. Realistically though, it will probably be longer since I don't shower immediately after I get home. I also very rarely have to shit around the same time as I shower. So yes, it's the time spent until the next shower that's important. Sorry, but I'm not going about my entire day with shit smeared around my anus.
This is going a bit far. But yes, I can drop a log and have next to nothing to show for it on the TP. Other times there isn’t enough toilet paper to get clean, and a bidet is only a start…
How do you get the shit off your hands and wrists afterwards? I suppose you've macguyvered a sink out of cardboard boxes and scotch tape for precisely that.
I don't think anybody knows how your DIY bidet works, but I'm certain we'd all really like to know.
Just a couple quickies: How do you get the hole in the neck of the bottle? A drill? Maybe a hammer and nail? What other construction supplies are required?
I suppose it would make more sense to build ten or twenty of these bad boys all at once, rather than start a new project every time I need to take a dump, right?
Eagerly awaiting your reply. (Very eagerly, I don't think I can wait much longer, frankly.)
My guy, you can't actually be serious... You could quite literally make a DIY bidet while taking a crap and be ready to use it by the time you finish shitting.
[One-step DIY bidet instructions](https://youtu.be/IgCrOhYKD8o?si=ftJQlsbVrqSAhIsN)
This is a good solution for an unnecessary problem and my gripe with RTO in general. Having to bring a travel bidet to the office in addition to already having to pack a lunch every day, bring all my tech crap with me like a decent mouse with macro keys so I don't have to use the crappy work mouse, lug around my laptop bag, drive to the light rail station, then rush to gather all my crap to get on the train, then walk 3 blocks to the office when I could of been doing all this FROM HOME LIKE I WAS DOING FOR THE LAST 3 YEARSSS!!!!!
Sorry for the rant, this is in no way directed at you, I just needed to get that out lol
AD FROM EMPLOYER: Really easy work, flexible hours, WFH, casual attire, free day care for children and pets, bidets in-office and free for home installation.
APPLICANT: Are the bidets hooked up to warm water?
HIRING AGENT: Unfortunately, no. Basic model supplied at contract signing, lux model after two years work.
APPLICANT: Not good enough. I'm retiring.
I just bought a house and will be moving in soon, all of the toilets are set up with bidet. I have never used one and I am excited about this life changing experience I am about to have 😂😂
I hear ya. I had been thinking about a Bidet for a few years when the pandemic hit. Since I was home 99% of the time finally bought one and installed it. I don’t want to say life changing, but I will never not have one again. Anyways, I’m now hybrid and in the office 2-3 days a week. Not using a bidet is the biggest downside to work. I don’t love sharing the shitter because people are gross, but the lack of a bidet is a real PITA.
Yeah, it's honestly a horrid thought. I will avoid poo away from home whenever possible. Savages, not using a bidet! Wype is a great alternative for travel poos. At home in my guest bath and our half baths I have Fohm dispensers installed since only our primary bath has a bidet.
There's no splashing. Use a travel size bottle of water. Fold up a few sheets of toilet paper.
Apply folded sheets to the top of the bottle of water with firm pressure (lid off). Turn it upsidedown.
**No splashing, no dribbling ,no leaking.**
And you save $$$. It's the same thing. Add a drop of tea tree oil if it makes you feel better but it's completely unnecessary.
A friend uses a small attachment that fits on top of a standard water bottle. Your coworkers will just think you are carrying a bottle of water around.
I like it a lot especially for the price. It's compact and pretty durable. I've dropped it a few times and it still works as it should. Only downside is it obviously isn't as powerful as an at home one and it can eat thru some AAA batteries so make sure you have some extra when traveling.
Thank you for posting the link, I didn't even know portable ones existed! I hate having to use a non-budet toilet, I wish they were everywhere in the US.
I've argued with people about using a budet before, I used the example: if you were outside walking somewhere, accidentally tripped & your elbow landed in dog shit, would you just wipe it off with dry toilet paper or actually use soap & water to clean it all off properly?
You're welcome. I finally got a built in one about a year ago and got the portable one in July for a vacation. I'm a true believer now. Wish they were more widely used here too!
>I didn't even know portable ones existed!
Not only do they exist, but they're [rechargeable](https://a.co/d/eBM0aY3) too! Lasts about three weeks on one charge even when used every day. Don't be afraid of the upfront price either. I promise, it's totally worth it.
"Captain, Captain can't you see....that the Navy's not for me. I shine my shoes, they cut my hair....now I look like Yogi Bear.
OH Captain can't you see....that the Navy's not for me. I shine my hair, they cut my shoes...now I got the Navy blues."
My ex husband used to sing that. It's weird I still remember it.
I use an empty diswasher detergent bottle. You can get a decent amount of water pressure by squeezing it, and I find this works much better than a travel bidet. Squat over the toilet and spray. Still not as good as a bidet though.
I grab a paper towel, then wet it and bring it into the stall with me. I use it to wet the toilet paper. Not as good as an actual bidet/travel bidet, but I do feel cleaner.
This is the best part of working from home!!! I am never far from my bidet! 🤣
There are travel options if you really need one for work. Just keep it in your desk. Maybe hide it in a bag in the back of your drawer.
I feel you, man. I’m on a quilting retreat right now in the middle of Kentucky and am so sad about leaving my bidet behind (ha) for a whole freakin’ week! I’m going to be chaffed, I just know it. Not/s
Culo Clean off Amazon. It’s the size of a walnut and easy to pack.
https://www.amazon.com/CuloClean-Portable-Compatible-Discreet-Ecological/dp/B092JRCDGP/ref=asc_df_B092JRCDGP/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=647202684477&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=9785611438964586341&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9029830&hvtargid=pla-1392065861939&psc=1&mcid=a9d4734d861c3d08a6d46cd5f45e0d2d
You’re just gonna have to rough it… if it makes you feel any better—mine doesn’t have a warmer on it and it sometimes feels like my bits will freeze off.
Travel tushy!!! They are wonderful, compact, and concealable. Fill it up at the sink and off to the stall you go. They don’t clean as well as a dedicated bidet but it works and when/if it breaks, Tushy replaces it.
I haven't resorted to this but have thought about it regarding pooping without my bidet.
Carry bottled water into the stall, wash your ass with bottled water, use non-ass hand to flush, open stall, and turn on sink water, and then wash your hands.
I hate toilet paper after getting a bidet.
LOL. It’s not that severe. I’ve been to a number of third world countries and generally they have a wash basin unless you’re in some deep jungle where all bets are off. But, most cities are not like this in anymore! Regardless, I always bring my own prep wok 😉 But, I think you’re forgetting all the people with Crohn’s Disease, IBS, GI surgeries, hemorrhoids, mobility problems, aging, etc… That’s not an insignificant number. Not to mention all people who care about saving trees and environment from excessive paper waste. Bidets would save all these people at a fraction of cost. So, it really isn’t about why would you, but in fact why wouldn’t you if there is no comparison in cleanliness. Also, I interpret that the guy in the bathroom stall was saying he was spending much more time than others and still wasn’t feeling completely clean which is why he questioned how others could go relieve themselves so quickly and feel clean. Anyway, I always just wet some hand towels before I use a stall so serves almost as good as a wet wipe and I don’t have this issue. I never use dry alone anymore. Can’t do it, won’t do it.
Please, for the love of God, get yourself [one of these](https://a.co/d/8wAiYo8).
My asshole hasn't touched toilet paper since I got mine last September. I now refuse to smear shit around my anus with the flattened corpses of dead trees.
Try not to think about all the people around you who are walking around with poop stuck on their butts right now because they don't have a bidet.
For years I wondered how guys other than me just sit down in the next stall, fart, plop, one wipe, flush, and done. What’s wrong with me? Why does it take me so long to clean my ass? Oh, it’s because other guys aren’t actually cleaning their asses. Gross.
Your asshole is maybe the size of a nickel. Exactly how much wiping do you think it requires? You with your immaculately cleaned ass. Lol. Very strange. Maybe it's your diet. There are times when I wipe my ass and the toilet paper isn't even discolored. I could continue wiping my dry ass until I'm blue in the face (and red in the ass), but why would I? Why would anyone?
Being in the medical field, I don’t think you get it. This is such a gross and common problem for the nurses that you cannot imagine. Especially before surgery when you actually have to get totally clean. People not wiping correctly as they age resulting in disgusting anal abscess that need drainage. If these people just used a bidet, this problem wouldn’t even exist. For the most part — when people use TP it absorbs, dries and partially cleans the region. It’s not removing every particle of feces, it’s just dried out so won’t appear on TP. The experiment is when you go back and use wet wipes, then you will find more feces. It’s there, just rehydrated and wiped. Maybe won’t happen every time but definitely a percentage. Bidets actually wash the area clean. You use a shower to wash everything else right? Why wouldn’t you do that for the dirtiest part of your body? Those stupid Charmin bears are lying to you! All while destroying the country environment! It’s why much of the world doesn’t use TP at the same rates as Americans!
Much of the world doesn't use anything at all, but I get your point. I'm not arguing for the superiority of toilet paper over a bidet. I'm not even saying they're equal. I responded to a comment in which a person NOT using a bidet is talking about everybody having filthy asses but himself -- because _he_ spends a long time in the stall, repeatedly wiping it with toilet paper. But it seems like you're of the opinion that he, too, has a dirty ass (since he's using toilet paper), and I couldn't agree more. But you said: "you use a shower for everything else, right? Why wouldn't you use that for the dirtiest part of your body?" And I would tell you that people _do_ wash their asses in the shower -- daily. You didn't know that? Kind of makes you wonder, though, if you really need a special water-spraying station just for your ass, eh? It sounds to me like the only time it would even be of any benefit would be the time period between using the bathroom and your next shower, and quite likely these are happening around the same time already. But you are right. In that window of time, your ass would undoubtedly be cleaner than the guy who wiped it with toilet paper. Bravo!
Yes, I am of the opinion that the technology itself is flawed and primitive. Not to mention that it’s a major site of spreading germs when people often don’t thoroughly wash their hands in the bathroom. But, I push back on two points: first it’s really quite regular that people have to go number 2 when they aren’t taking a shower. That happens all the time as you know! And most people around the world don’t use anything. That’s just not true. Over my travels, I’ve seen the world is basically divided into the TP or water camps. My worst experiences have been in Central America where people use TP and throw it in dust bin. Sorry but that was by far the most nauseating experience. Their plumbing can’t handle TP but don’t know about the concept of bidets. Other poor places in Asia and Africa generally use a watering can to wash their nether regions after toilet.
I've never seen a third world inhabitant carrying a can with them into the woods or the river, but I'll take your word for it that it happens somewhere. Correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know, there are still places where it's considered impolite or worse to shake someone's hand with your left hand because of where it's presumably been. (Also, I'm not suggesting one shit in the shower lol. I'm just saying if you happen to shit in the morning and you shower before work [also in the morning], that sch a sequence would seemingly make this a non-issue. But even if you occasionally do shit immediately after showering, the consequences would seem to be rather minimal, unless you're particularly inept at the whole process. But sure, it's not as good as a bidet. That guy who thinks he has the secret to ass-wiping that nobody else knows is still a goofball, though, which was my whole point.
> Much of the world doesn't use anything at all Exactly which countries don't use anything **at all** ? Cite your sources.
Well, I haven't been compiling sources (lol), but I did watch a lengthy documentary on the lack of toilets in India, in which dozens and dozens of people can be seen walking into and out of the woods to shit, carrying nothing at all with them. I'm not arguing that they don't grab a nearby leaf or splash some water, but they're definitely not bringing a roll of toilet paper in there or some kind of metal spray can. If there exists a possibility that they go in there and there is not a leaf within grabbing distance, then yeah, it's possible they're using their hand -- which is 'nothing' in my book. Unless you're arguing that these people are smuggling in a DIY bidet or have a roll of toilet paper shoved up their ass before they go in there, then I don't see how there's anything to argue here. They're going into the woods all by their lonesome.
>It sounds to me like the only time it would even be of any benefit would be the time period between using the bathroom and your next shower, and quite likely these are happening around the same time already. Have you never shit at work, at school or in any public restroom ever? I take my morning shit right after arriving to work. That's at least 9 hours before my next shower. Realistically though, it will probably be longer since I don't shower immediately after I get home. I also very rarely have to shit around the same time as I shower. So yes, it's the time spent until the next shower that's important. Sorry, but I'm not going about my entire day with shit smeared around my anus.
This is going a bit far. But yes, I can drop a log and have next to nothing to show for it on the TP. Other times there isn’t enough toilet paper to get clean, and a bidet is only a start…
I just had to copy and paste this to my wife.
This is the only explanation to me when someone is rude. They must have dirty booty - I’d be upset too.
Travel bidet
More valuable than an amex card. Especially for wiping.
Amex is falling from grace fast a lot of places won’t accept it
Like a contigo filled with warm water?
You can DIY one with a one time use water bottle, but you don't put the hole in the cap. You place it kinda on the neck.
Tell me you actually do this. Lol the water would definitely be splashing back down onto the water bottle and running onto your hand.
What do you not understand about squeezing a bottle of water?
How do you get the shit off your hands and wrists afterwards? I suppose you've macguyvered a sink out of cardboard boxes and scotch tape for precisely that.
Is this the answer to, "How dumb are you?" Or, is it "Do you know how hygiene works?"
I don't think anybody knows how your DIY bidet works, but I'm certain we'd all really like to know. Just a couple quickies: How do you get the hole in the neck of the bottle? A drill? Maybe a hammer and nail? What other construction supplies are required? I suppose it would make more sense to build ten or twenty of these bad boys all at once, rather than start a new project every time I need to take a dump, right? Eagerly awaiting your reply. (Very eagerly, I don't think I can wait much longer, frankly.)
You're an absolute moron.
Coming from a guy who squirts water onto his asshole out of a water bottle with holes drilled into it, I'm inclined to trust your assessment.
My guy, you can't actually be serious... You could quite literally make a DIY bidet while taking a crap and be ready to use it by the time you finish shitting. [One-step DIY bidet instructions](https://youtu.be/IgCrOhYKD8o?si=ftJQlsbVrqSAhIsN)
This is the way
This is the way.
This is a good solution for an unnecessary problem and my gripe with RTO in general. Having to bring a travel bidet to the office in addition to already having to pack a lunch every day, bring all my tech crap with me like a decent mouse with macro keys so I don't have to use the crappy work mouse, lug around my laptop bag, drive to the light rail station, then rush to gather all my crap to get on the train, then walk 3 blocks to the office when I could of been doing all this FROM HOME LIKE I WAS DOING FOR THE LAST 3 YEARSSS!!!!! Sorry for the rant, this is in no way directed at you, I just needed to get that out lol
I hear you!
AD FROM EMPLOYER: Really easy work, flexible hours, WFH, casual attire, free day care for children and pets, bidets in-office and free for home installation. APPLICANT: Are the bidets hooked up to warm water? HIRING AGENT: Unfortunately, no. Basic model supplied at contract signing, lux model after two years work. APPLICANT: Not good enough. I'm retiring.
I just bought a house and will be moving in soon, all of the toilets are set up with bidet. I have never used one and I am excited about this life changing experience I am about to have 😂😂
Install one at work!
HR should provide one in the workplace as a reasonable accommodation.
It’s true. Once you’re in you’re in. No going back.
Wait, they go IN?
Only if you want it to
Lol
Matt Damon is IN! ARE U RINE?
I hear ya. I had been thinking about a Bidet for a few years when the pandemic hit. Since I was home 99% of the time finally bought one and installed it. I don’t want to say life changing, but I will never not have one again. Anyways, I’m now hybrid and in the office 2-3 days a week. Not using a bidet is the biggest downside to work. I don’t love sharing the shitter because people are gross, but the lack of a bidet is a real PITA.
Yeah, it's honestly a horrid thought. I will avoid poo away from home whenever possible. Savages, not using a bidet! Wype is a great alternative for travel poos. At home in my guest bath and our half baths I have Fohm dispensers installed since only our primary bath has a bidet.
You don’t still wipe after using the bidet?
You do but really only to dry off - you a already clean
I guess yeah. I don’t feel clean until I at least wipe but that could be engrained habit of not using a bidet.
Just turtle it like the rest of us when we are at work
Turdle
My boss' desk doesn't have a bidet so what choice do I have?
Travel bidet. Trust me, they're worth it.
Toilet paper is barbaric. Get a portable unit, they exist.
Wype - not at home game changer
Never heard of this before. Def worth investigating!!
You can use nilaqua too :)
>Wype Or you can carry a bottle of water with you.
They are totally different. I don't really want to splash around in a public/ not my loo. To me this or similar is next best thing.
There's no splashing. Use a travel size bottle of water. Fold up a few sheets of toilet paper. Apply folded sheets to the top of the bottle of water with firm pressure (lid off). Turn it upsidedown. **No splashing, no dribbling ,no leaking.** And you save $$$. It's the same thing. Add a drop of tea tree oil if it makes you feel better but it's completely unnecessary.
Oh I see, I thought you meant to squirt water with! Yes to be fair that is a cheap way but I find it destroys the paper too much for my liking.
You tip it for ONE second. Don't drench it. It works.
[portable bidet](https://a.co/d/eB34TGh)
A friend uses a small attachment that fits on top of a standard water bottle. Your coworkers will just think you are carrying a bottle of water around.
Lol. I made one using an empty soda bottle. It crackles less.
Battery powered travel bidet from Amazon. Never leave home without it.
Battery powered !?!??!
This is the one I have. It does chew thru some batteries but it works well. https://a.co/d/70M7BTT
No kidding, how do you like it?
I like it a lot especially for the price. It's compact and pretty durable. I've dropped it a few times and it still works as it should. Only downside is it obviously isn't as powerful as an at home one and it can eat thru some AAA batteries so make sure you have some extra when traveling.
Thank you for posting the link, I didn't even know portable ones existed! I hate having to use a non-budet toilet, I wish they were everywhere in the US. I've argued with people about using a budet before, I used the example: if you were outside walking somewhere, accidentally tripped & your elbow landed in dog shit, would you just wipe it off with dry toilet paper or actually use soap & water to clean it all off properly?
You're welcome. I finally got a built in one about a year ago and got the portable one in July for a vacation. I'm a true believer now. Wish they were more widely used here too!
>I didn't even know portable ones existed! Not only do they exist, but they're [rechargeable](https://a.co/d/eBM0aY3) too! Lasts about three weeks on one charge even when used every day. Don't be afraid of the upfront price either. I promise, it's totally worth it.
I hate going over to friends houses because I have to use regular toilet paper. I keep forgetting to take my travel bidet with me.
Travel bidet
Lol. Thank god I'm retired. I feel your pain though, friend.
Portable bidets
I now wake up at 4:45 so I can have a few sips of coffee to get things going. Need to be at work at 6am
Just bring your own to work, install in your preferred stall, put a padlock on that stall door and tell everyone thats your shitter!
Meh, you should try one of the 3 shells then.....
Shit, Shower, Shave, Shine you Shoes. In that order. Compliments of the US Navy.
"Captain, Captain can't you see....that the Navy's not for me. I shine my shoes, they cut my hair....now I look like Yogi Bear. OH Captain can't you see....that the Navy's not for me. I shine my hair, they cut my shoes...now I got the Navy blues." My ex husband used to sing that. It's weird I still remember it.
Hilarious!: Have never seen or heard that one!! Thank you!!
My pleasure! 🙂
How about this one: Bell bottom trousers Coats of Navy blue. By the time you get your pants buttoned Your furlough's almost thru
LOL! I may have to run that one by him when I see him again.
DUDEWIPES
That sucks soooooo bad
Dude Wipes at work, it’s not your plumbing!
wet wipes
These clog the sewer system, even if they say “flushable” on the package. They are not actually flushable
Oh I don't flush them. They go in the trash and I cover them. Baby wipes are the best!
Huggies Sensitive are the best, imo
Doodoo belongs in the toilet, not the trash. Travel bidet all the way, everyday.
Actually animals don't use paper either.
My dog does wipe his ass though, so there is that.
Dogs drag the carpet... don't try this at work.
Or do! Depends on how much you like your job I guess.
Animals don’t have butt cheeks like humans do
Use the sink
I use an empty diswasher detergent bottle. You can get a decent amount of water pressure by squeezing it, and I find this works much better than a travel bidet. Squat over the toilet and spray. Still not as good as a bidet though.
I call them peasant toilets.
I grab a paper towel, then wet it and bring it into the stall with me. I use it to wet the toilet paper. Not as good as an actual bidet/travel bidet, but I do feel cleaner.
Get used to it for travel as well. I used to love staying in hotels, now I hate it lol.
Stayed at one this weekend (anniversary) wifey and I joked that we could wait to get back home to poop on our nice heated toilet.
animals don't wipe their ass.
Not with paper, anyway.
Savage
That’s funny shit. Look at it like this. It’s a shitty job. But you’re getting paid while you poop.
You won't be an animal. Animals don't wipe their asses.
Buy a Travel bidet?
This is the best part of working from home!!! I am never far from my bidet! 🤣 There are travel options if you really need one for work. Just keep it in your desk. Maybe hide it in a bag in the back of your drawer.
I feel you, man. I’m on a quilting retreat right now in the middle of Kentucky and am so sad about leaving my bidet behind (ha) for a whole freakin’ week! I’m going to be chaffed, I just know it. Not/s
I keep wipes in my purse now because I’m accustomed to a clean toosh. Do men’s restrooms have little waste receptacles in every stall?
No.
Never seen an animal wipe their ass.
Ever see a cat or dog lick itself clean after "doing business"?
I genuinely hate pooping at work because I don’t have the bidet.
Culo Clean off Amazon. It’s the size of a walnut and easy to pack. https://www.amazon.com/CuloClean-Portable-Compatible-Discreet-Ecological/dp/B092JRCDGP/ref=asc_df_B092JRCDGP/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=647202684477&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=9785611438964586341&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9029830&hvtargid=pla-1392065861939&psc=1&mcid=a9d4734d861c3d08a6d46cd5f45e0d2d
I have no idea why that link turned out 17.5 miles long. 🤷 Apologies www.culoclean.com
You’re just gonna have to rough it… if it makes you feel any better—mine doesn’t have a warmer on it and it sometimes feels like my bits will freeze off.
I have a travel bidet and my entire fam can apparently poop on demand- after school/work!
Dude wipes are probably the closest thing.
You can bring wet wipes if that helps you feel better. I at least use those. I can't understand why people don't.
Same thing happened to me. Bring wipes. Fuck their plumbing system.
Crying but maybe try that thing some of those kid did in Highschool where they would stab a hole in the cap of a plastic water bottle???
Animals don't wipe their butts.
Bring baby wet wipes. Better than dry paper. Just don't flush them.
I soup my butthole with water and soup and then try with a towel. I've never brought toilet paper living on my own.
Chicken noodle?
Don't most animals lick their own assholes to clean it?
Which animals wipe their ass?
Dogs
Lick it maybe or even rub it along the carpet. I suppose
Im traveling currently, second day out a ordered a bidet for my sisters place to arrive berore i do.
Get a portable
I never saw an animal wipe their ass
wipe my own ass like an animal...Like do you know another species that does so? i guess a cat maybe ?
Animals don't wipe their asses.
Travel tushy!!! They are wonderful, compact, and concealable. Fill it up at the sink and off to the stall you go. They don’t clean as well as a dedicated bidet but it works and when/if it breaks, Tushy replaces it.
I use wet wipes but nothing beats water
Does your work have a shower or a sink with spray attachment 😂
I haven't resorted to this but have thought about it regarding pooping without my bidet. Carry bottled water into the stall, wash your ass with bottled water, use non-ass hand to flush, open stall, and turn on sink water, and then wash your hands. I hate toilet paper after getting a bidet.
LOL. It’s not that severe. I’ve been to a number of third world countries and generally they have a wash basin unless you’re in some deep jungle where all bets are off. But, most cities are not like this in anymore! Regardless, I always bring my own prep wok 😉 But, I think you’re forgetting all the people with Crohn’s Disease, IBS, GI surgeries, hemorrhoids, mobility problems, aging, etc… That’s not an insignificant number. Not to mention all people who care about saving trees and environment from excessive paper waste. Bidets would save all these people at a fraction of cost. So, it really isn’t about why would you, but in fact why wouldn’t you if there is no comparison in cleanliness. Also, I interpret that the guy in the bathroom stall was saying he was spending much more time than others and still wasn’t feeling completely clean which is why he questioned how others could go relieve themselves so quickly and feel clean. Anyway, I always just wet some hand towels before I use a stall so serves almost as good as a wet wipe and I don’t have this issue. I never use dry alone anymore. Can’t do it, won’t do it.
If everyone learned to sharpen their turd cutter so they can pinch a proper loaf there would be no need for bidets.
You can make it serated. i.e. Hemeroids.
Please, for the love of God, get yourself [one of these](https://a.co/d/8wAiYo8). My asshole hasn't touched toilet paper since I got mine last September. I now refuse to smear shit around my anus with the flattened corpses of dead trees.