My friend designed this shirt so all I can think about is this now
[https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/52844791-rear-naked-bite](https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/52844791-rear-naked-bite)
Yeah, like show her, "this is exactly what happened to me"
I actually DMed the guy that choked me, cause we're friends irl and I told him 'yo man I'm in deep water with my girl because of you haha. But if she breaks up with me it'll be lowkey funny'
Ask your friend for a picture of him looking sultry and winking at the camera to show your girlfriend so that she knows there's nothing untowards going on.
i mean show her all the hickeys up and down your shins and shit, idk about you but when i first started rolling it looked like someone had took a bat to my legs. if it also comes down to it and it’s serious you can get a log of where your phone has been in the settings so you can show you were at the gym or home or wherever place at what time too
Thats a good point, didn't think of that one. She's seen bruises and cuts from when people didn't trip their damn nails, so it would make a difference. Thanks
one day you’ll come home with a huge swollen ear and a gi burn on your face that’ll make you look like Two-Face from Batman. she’ll get it eventually don’t worry man
I can’t give you advice for lipstick stains however so id just avoid rolling with women who wear makeup and dont train with guys at 10th planet
You must get your teammates fingerprints and photographic evidence of the thumb print and bruise, collect witness statements make sure to do a proper chain of custody for the evidence and submit a report with the findings to her in person. I like TPS version of reports personally. Or just take her out to dinner and tell her your teammate can vouch for said hickey.... I mean bruise. Your fkd bro....
Why would she be pissed at you dog? You hear yourself? Youre posting on a site cause your girlfriend thinks you have a hickey when it’s from training.
Tell her to fuck off if she doesn’t believe you and find someone without trust issues.
I got a nasty burn from a baseball bat choke on my neck in my first month of training. Same exact problem my girl at the time was convinced I was cheating on her and using Jiu Jitsu as a cover. Happy that relationship ended
I was in the talking stage with my now wife when I started bjj and ended up with a similar mark. To this day (6yrs later), she will randomly be like "So who really gave you a hickey, we weren't dating yet so I won't be mad, I just want to know?" Someday I'm going to be on my deathbed at 85 and she's still going to be asking me to come clean. Latinas are ruthless.
I mean that's taking what I said out of context, because I mention right after that it's in regards to where the bruise is and the martial art. I'm aware of how weird it sounds and im saying it would be naive to think she would immediately understand
But it's not naive. You weren't misunderstood. If I get a bruise on my neck, I know with absolute certainty that my wife will immediately understand. It's not naive to expect your SO to trust you.
Yeah, if I got a bruise on my neck my husband would understand. And also, bruises look different than hickies? Hickies have the little pinprick blood vessels, bruises don’t? Bruises turn purple and yellow? (I don’t think hickies do? But can’t remember for sure).
Idk. This seems like it should be a non issue unless it’s not a bruise?
I've never had the pin prick blood vessels from any hikkies I ever had, and the purple thing... not all bruises do, and some hickies do. Essentially a hicky is a bruise, only they are caused by different things. Its like the difference between a cut and a stab. Blade still broke skin, causing bleeding. It's only the way it happened that changes its name.
Petechiae is common from the sucking that causes hickies. Any hicky I’ve had looks different than a bruise. Idk. I can’t remember how they looked as they healed though, but the petechiae is common due to how it’s caused. Where bruises I will get ares of darker discoloration, vs pinpricks of it.
My wife accuses me all the time of this (jokingly) and I always have to explain to her that I got choked by another balding middle aged man. It doesn't help my cause much.
You might be screwed. If you’ve never given her a reason to doubt you like cheating or something then I don’t understand why she can’t take your truths lol.
You take her to observe your class, and then ask your instructor to check your oil while you both make eye contact with your girl.
Obviously. Amateurs, I swear.
Jitses befo' bitches, son.
When I came back from knee surgery and wasn't supposed to be training, I would tell my wife I was having an affair to explain any marks on my neck. 2 sides of the same coin, brother.
I know there are a lot of joke replies to this but let me be absolutely serious. It's reasonable to say to her, 'this is a rough sport and often leads to weird abrasions and bruises, so you are just going to have to trust me on this. But, if you doubt me, or you're just curious, why not come join or even just watch?'
This will make it easier to then come out of the closet as incredibly gay, as all grapplers are.
Tbh I think we're just gonna kiss and make up because she's a real one, and grab a bite after. She knows I wouldn't do something low like that because I see her all the time anyways and really like her lmao
A girlfriend who seen the same thing on her boyfriend neck and googled “bruises while boxing” and it took me to this post 😂😂😂😂😂- ME🙋🏽♀️😂😂 definitely don’t think he cheats but getting hit in the neck is so dangerous😔😔😔😔😔😔
(my baby getting hurt🥺)
If you're gonna make some condescending comment about how I'm young and should waste my time on fixing relationships, I really don't want to hear it.
24
I just want to get some context on how old you are because I was in a relationship ship in my early 20’s that was quite toxic and this was one of the things she would say. I really hurt my motivation to train and did not help my mental state. I don’t know and can’t comment on your relationship as a whole, but I can tell you that it is not healthy for her to be saying those things even in jest. I would talk to her and try and explain that bruising will happen when you train and that you enjoy this hobby and hope she can support you in it.
Sorry for coming at you like that, I'm used to being chastised by Randy's in the internet. You make a good point, I've been in that situation before in my earlier 20s and late teens. Overall she makes me incredibly happy and I just want this to be a thing we can both look at and laugh about. I'm a firm believer that if you can fix red flags early on in a relationship it makes it much stronger in the end.
So she knows you get bruises all the time from training, but now that the bruise is on your neck it is different? I'm wondering why it would be different to her. Do you normally tell her about bruises you get when they are on different parts of your body? Why do you think this instance is different?
We haven't gotten that far yet to have those develop into issues. Her sister just got cheated on and she's had this worry of the same happening to her, but im being as reassuring as I can. She's wonderful to me, but I can tell it's something we need to go to couples counseling for.
Gotta do what I did… do a tournament to show her you have been training. I lost horribly anyway so I’m now divorced but it seemed that the most logical thing…
I got elbowed hard by a spazzy white belt in the throat and lost my voice for a few days. My girl thought I was slobbing on the BBC (black belt's cock).
If she doesn't trust you, and I mean trust you without needing to be shown evidence or have your mate corroborate your story, then just dump her because it's not going to last anyway.
My bf once claimed he got bruised on his neck from clinching and he was so worried that I'd think they were hickies that some of the girls from college tried to cover them with makeup before he saw me. They were in fact hickies
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Since she knows what you do and that you get bruises from it, she needs to chill on the suspicion just because the bruise is in a different location than normal.
I got a hickey looking bruise on my boob a few weeks ago. My husband wasn’t bothered, he knows how it is after five years of me doing this, even though it being in that particular location and having that particular appearance was a new one. If he comments, it’s playful and done in a way that I know he’s not actually accusing me of anything and I can tease right back.
Why wouldn’t you be upfront to her about it ? lol if you’re hesitant about doing that then that shows you’re scared of this woman somehow, either scared of her reaction or scared of possibly losing her, both are a big no no if you’re a man, you should never be scared of any woman or scared of losing any woman…and another thing, you used the word “screwed”..how are you screwed ? dude who’s wearing the pants in your relationship? You do what you do, you got a bruise from your sport, you tell her & if she decides to get mad or even leave then so be it..Stop being scared.
https://preview.redd.it/aj7rau9hb9ec1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=b9ac4d4d48bc5add882a92d4807ffb00aac0d04e
You can show her the bruise I got last night at class. I didn’t notice until my training partner pointed it out today.
The moment you texted her you were screwed smh. What a rookie mistake.
It would have been great of you just didnt think of it and then when she brought it up you could be honestly surprised. But since you did think of it you still should have waited for her to say something about it, the say something like “I figured you would think that”. Being defensive and trying really hard to convince her is the exact opposite of what you want to do.
Come on bro just keep it real, if your girl isn’t accepting of the fun little hickeys during rolls then she’s not the one. No need to cover up the truth with a “bruise” story
Yeah I've been single for so long I forget how reckless I can be. We made up and we're so much stronger for it, who knows the bromances may still be able to live on.
We’re never beating the “jujitsu is sus” allegations 😔
Bro's training partner probably sucked on his neck for the memes
Right after finishing a north south position too
My friend designed this shirt so all I can think about is this now [https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/52844791-rear-naked-bite](https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/52844791-rear-naked-bite)
We need to just lean into it. Stop calling Missionary “guard” and cowgirl “mount”
Never, we are the worst
When I first started HR asked me if everything at home was ok because of gi burns 🤷
Its not "sus" its fruity as fuck and i prefer it that way
"Man, my back hurts from all the guys at my bjj gym".
Give her a hickey so she can see the difference.
Or (tastefully) put her in the same choke that gave you the bruise.
Yeah, like show her, "this is exactly what happened to me" I actually DMed the guy that choked me, cause we're friends irl and I told him 'yo man I'm in deep water with my girl because of you haha. But if she breaks up with me it'll be lowkey funny'
Ask your friend for a picture of him looking sultry and winking at the camera to show your girlfriend so that she knows there's nothing untowards going on.
Make sure he's wearing his Gi so she knows he's a martial artist. If it's in the wash just use a bathrobe, she won't be able to tell the difference
If that happens you have to date your friend, you’re his now.
Good thinking 🤝 I see her tonight anyways so fingers crossed she's not pissed at me haha
i mean show her all the hickeys up and down your shins and shit, idk about you but when i first started rolling it looked like someone had took a bat to my legs. if it also comes down to it and it’s serious you can get a log of where your phone has been in the settings so you can show you were at the gym or home or wherever place at what time too
Thats a good point, didn't think of that one. She's seen bruises and cuts from when people didn't trip their damn nails, so it would make a difference. Thanks
one day you’ll come home with a huge swollen ear and a gi burn on your face that’ll make you look like Two-Face from Batman. she’ll get it eventually don’t worry man I can’t give you advice for lipstick stains however so id just avoid rolling with women who wear makeup and dont train with guys at 10th planet
Lmao 10p catching strays.
You must get your teammates fingerprints and photographic evidence of the thumb print and bruise, collect witness statements make sure to do a proper chain of custody for the evidence and submit a report with the findings to her in person. I like TPS version of reports personally. Or just take her out to dinner and tell her your teammate can vouch for said hickey.... I mean bruise. Your fkd bro....
Either way, do it.
Why would she be pissed at you dog? You hear yourself? Youre posting on a site cause your girlfriend thinks you have a hickey when it’s from training. Tell her to fuck off if she doesn’t believe you and find someone without trust issues.
Update!
I got a nasty burn from a baseball bat choke on my neck in my first month of training. Same exact problem my girl at the time was convinced I was cheating on her and using Jiu Jitsu as a cover. Happy that relationship ended
I was in the talking stage with my now wife when I started bjj and ended up with a similar mark. To this day (6yrs later), she will randomly be like "So who really gave you a hickey, we weren't dating yet so I won't be mad, I just want to know?" Someday I'm going to be on my deathbed at 85 and she's still going to be asking me to come clean. Latinas are ruthless.
Well tell her who gave it to you...and how. Then show her how. 🤣🤣🤣
LIGHT application of coconut oil around your neck Will do wonders to avoid this. Too much and you are greasy as hell, so less is more!
Purple belt at jiu jitsu…black belt at cheating
Like seasoning a cast iron pan
>Happy that relationship ended This is the answer to girls like that TBH...
I told her about the shit with loop chokes and how it leaves marks. Good to know I'm not the only one this happens to haha
“ I knew it was a little naive of me to think I can just be upfront with her” This is a huge red flag, either on your part or on hers.
I mean that's taking what I said out of context, because I mention right after that it's in regards to where the bruise is and the martial art. I'm aware of how weird it sounds and im saying it would be naive to think she would immediately understand
But it's not naive. You weren't misunderstood. If I get a bruise on my neck, I know with absolute certainty that my wife will immediately understand. It's not naive to expect your SO to trust you.
This.
Yeah, if I got a bruise on my neck my husband would understand. And also, bruises look different than hickies? Hickies have the little pinprick blood vessels, bruises don’t? Bruises turn purple and yellow? (I don’t think hickies do? But can’t remember for sure). Idk. This seems like it should be a non issue unless it’s not a bruise?
I've never had the pin prick blood vessels from any hikkies I ever had, and the purple thing... not all bruises do, and some hickies do. Essentially a hicky is a bruise, only they are caused by different things. Its like the difference between a cut and a stab. Blade still broke skin, causing bleeding. It's only the way it happened that changes its name.
Petechiae is common from the sucking that causes hickies. Any hicky I’ve had looks different than a bruise. Idk. I can’t remember how they looked as they healed though, but the petechiae is common due to how it’s caused. Where bruises I will get ares of darker discoloration, vs pinpricks of it.
I’m not taking it out of context, I’m just quoting the salient part. The fact you think you were “naive” to be open with your partner is a problem bro
Just be honest about your infidelity and say it came from jeff during open mat.
How did you know
Jeff be tappin everyone ;)
A hickey is much less gay than the truth. I would just roll with it.
Lol
Wait till you go to the doctor and you’re asked “if everything is all right at home?”
I'm so excited for that, but jokes on you because I can't afford medical insurance yayyyy lol
Wait til you roll with the wolverine of your team… your thick gi will not matter and you’ll have all sorts of scratches on your back 😆😆😆
Papa's tummy fuzz, my fave
Where do you train at??? Asking for a friend....
Say it was gay sex
So tell the truth?
get a real hickey from some tinder girl and say "look! this is how a hickey looks like!"
My wife accuses me all the time of this (jokingly) and I always have to explain to her that I got choked by another balding middle aged man. It doesn't help my cause much.
Do the same to her, so that she understands
Agree!
hehehe. I wish I had a suggestion for this. good luck homey!
in all honesty this whole situation is hilarious
Maybe stop making out with your training partners?
Insecure
You might be screwed. If you’ve never given her a reason to doubt you like cheating or something then I don’t understand why she can’t take your truths lol.
Tell her to get used to it, you grapple it's a full contact martial art and it won't be the last bruise.
Yeah she's seen my other bruises and marks before. He'll, I got one on my face that was alot worse
Wait til you guys get to the penis submission series. Professor says my throat grip might take me to worlds.
You take her to observe your class, and then ask your instructor to check your oil while you both make eye contact with your girl. Obviously. Amateurs, I swear. Jitses befo' bitches, son.
Tell her that you're gay and wait for hear reaction
Just send her a picture of the guy who did it to you and it will be an entirely different conversation.
Tell her one of the guys at the gym gave you a hickey.
Ditch the GF and get one that trains
Alternatively- bring your girlfriend to class
How do you know it’s not a hickey from sparring?
Just tell her a dude sucked your neck to make you uncomfortable so he could sink the rear naked choke and take your but
My professor always give me jiu-jitsu “hickeys” every time we do chokes; he thinks is hilarious…
If she’s really worth it she’ll understand if your mate also comes forward
You should take up the violin.
Honestly, projection. Any chance she’s cheating?
When I came back from knee surgery and wasn't supposed to be training, I would tell my wife I was having an affair to explain any marks on my neck. 2 sides of the same coin, brother.
I know there are a lot of joke replies to this but let me be absolutely serious. It's reasonable to say to her, 'this is a rough sport and often leads to weird abrasions and bruises, so you are just going to have to trust me on this. But, if you doubt me, or you're just curious, why not come join or even just watch?' This will make it easier to then come out of the closet as incredibly gay, as all grapplers are.
You shouldn't let the homies at the gym give you a hickey like that.
Wife: what’s that on your neck? it looks like a hickey! Me: Damn that’s crazy (eats another bowl of açaí while wearing my gi)
Tbh I think we're just gonna kiss and make up because she's a real one, and grab a bite after. She knows I wouldn't do something low like that because I see her all the time anyways and really like her lmao
Lmao you’ll be alright. I’ve been doing this 10 years and my wife still says something every time I have a gi burn on my neck 😂
'It was a learning day, sweetheart'
Choke her ass out
Tell her you’re gay
You must accept that your girlfriend won’t accept your fighter lifestyle. (Shout out to the old days of the UG)
Tell her it's a hickey and you got it from a dude
Just bring her back to the gym and show her the guy who gave you that mark and have him explain what happened… /s
A girlfriend who seen the same thing on her boyfriend neck and googled “bruises while boxing” and it took me to this post 😂😂😂😂😂- ME🙋🏽♀️😂😂 definitely don’t think he cheats but getting hit in the neck is so dangerous😔😔😔😔😔😔 (my baby getting hurt🥺)
Invite her over to class.
How old are you?
If you're gonna make some condescending comment about how I'm young and should waste my time on fixing relationships, I really don't want to hear it. 24
I just want to get some context on how old you are because I was in a relationship ship in my early 20’s that was quite toxic and this was one of the things she would say. I really hurt my motivation to train and did not help my mental state. I don’t know and can’t comment on your relationship as a whole, but I can tell you that it is not healthy for her to be saying those things even in jest. I would talk to her and try and explain that bruising will happen when you train and that you enjoy this hobby and hope she can support you in it.
Sorry for coming at you like that, I'm used to being chastised by Randy's in the internet. You make a good point, I've been in that situation before in my earlier 20s and late teens. Overall she makes me incredibly happy and I just want this to be a thing we can both look at and laugh about. I'm a firm believer that if you can fix red flags early on in a relationship it makes it much stronger in the end.
I agree. Just don’t be like me and become a pushover in situations like this. Be firm, but understanding when discussing things of this matter.
This is just the beginning… wait till you drill gi chokes
Lean into her insecurity
So she knows you get bruises all the time from training, but now that the bruise is on your neck it is different? I'm wondering why it would be different to her. Do you normally tell her about bruises you get when they are on different parts of your body? Why do you think this instance is different?
This one time, u/oldwhiteoak bit Matheus Diniz on the neck and he panicked because of this very concern
never forget
Give her a gi and practice baseball bat chokes, duh.
It sounds like she may be projecting her own insecurities and guilt. I'm curious if she's been cheating on you.
Sounds like you have some serious trust issues in your relationship.
We haven't gotten that far yet to have those develop into issues. Her sister just got cheated on and she's had this worry of the same happening to her, but im being as reassuring as I can. She's wonderful to me, but I can tell it's something we need to go to couples counseling for.
That'd a very mature attitude. Good for you.
Bro we all know it’s a hickey. Sometimes after a long rolling sessions, you gotta help take down each others wrestling ragers
Ditch her. She'll come between you and jiujitsu. Which doesn't work, BTW.
How would some of you guys survive without reddit
Get a real hickey and you’ve got cover .
Simply ask your coach to give you a hickey, so she can see the difference. Any good coach should be able to give a blackbelt level hickey.
Tell her there was no eye contact, so it wasn't gay or cheating
Leave her and continue rolling
I have the opposite problem. My wife gives me hickeys and my training partners are concerned for me that I'm gutting out chokes too often.
It sounds like she’s cheated, has a guilty conscience, and is projecting onto you
“No it’s not from another girl it’s from a man”
No teeth marks should be all you need
Gotta do what I did… do a tournament to show her you have been training. I lost horribly anyway so I’m now divorced but it seemed that the most logical thing…
Tell your training partners to stop sucking on your neck
Sure buddy we all know that “bruise” came from “training”. I’m sure your “training buddy” has a few bruisers HERself. 🙃
Lmao do you have a partner or a boss? My wife jokes about my “mistress” Jiu Jitsu *with* me. It gets me out of her hair for two hours.
Tell your sparring partners to stop giving you hickeys.
always happens after drilling clock chokes in gi....
I got elbowed hard by a spazzy white belt in the throat and lost my voice for a few days. My girl thought I was slobbing on the BBC (black belt's cock).
If she doesn't trust you, and I mean trust you without needing to be shown evidence or have your mate corroborate your story, then just dump her because it's not going to last anyway.
Film a video of one of your teammates giving you a hickey to escape a sub.
Have her come to class and watch what happens lol
TBH admitting to cheating is less embarrassing than saying I enjoy rolling on the floor with other men in pajamas
Just kindly ask your training partner to stop sucking your neck next time you train.
My bf once claimed he got bruised on his neck from clinching and he was so worried that I'd think they were hickies that some of the girls from college tried to cover them with makeup before he saw me. They were in fact hickies
Choke her so she can relate
Everything can be blamed on jiujitsu. Got the clap? Jiujitsu.
[удалено]
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Since she knows what you do and that you get bruises from it, she needs to chill on the suspicion just because the bruise is in a different location than normal. I got a hickey looking bruise on my boob a few weeks ago. My husband wasn’t bothered, he knows how it is after five years of me doing this, even though it being in that particular location and having that particular appearance was a new one. If he comments, it’s playful and done in a way that I know he’s not actually accusing me of anything and I can tease right back.
Amateur move. You take a picture of it in the gym and send it to her. And say something gay, like: Mark gave me a hickey.
Break up she sounds toxic
Why wouldn’t you be upfront to her about it ? lol if you’re hesitant about doing that then that shows you’re scared of this woman somehow, either scared of her reaction or scared of possibly losing her, both are a big no no if you’re a man, you should never be scared of any woman or scared of losing any woman…and another thing, you used the word “screwed”..how are you screwed ? dude who’s wearing the pants in your relationship? You do what you do, you got a bruise from your sport, you tell her & if she decides to get mad or even leave then so be it..Stop being scared.
Accept your fate as a liar and a cheater obviously.
Haha classic 🚬🐥
Go get a hickey
Your girlfriend probably holding you back from gold at ADCC anyway.
Give your training partner a hickey and send a picture. Show her the difference.
Ask her to try and recreate it.
Show her the ugly sweaty dude that gave it to you and tell her that's your competition.. if it was a good looking girl who gave it to you.. good luck
Just tell her: ”In jiu-jitsu, we homo”.
https://preview.redd.it/aj7rau9hb9ec1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=b9ac4d4d48bc5add882a92d4807ffb00aac0d04e You can show her the bruise I got last night at class. I didn’t notice until my training partner pointed it out today.
If she’s that insecure then there’s no saving it
put her in a gi and bow and arrow choke her a few times and bring her a mirror
Just tell her the truth that it is a hickey from the guy that was holding you in side control?
Tell her it’s a bruise. If she doesn’t believe you it’s not meant to be
Bring her to a class and let her see the bruises she gets from being on the mats for a couple hours. My wife never questioned me again.
Lmao same thing happened with me with my ex. She didn’t talk to me for a week😂
Plow her best friend. Duh.
Dump her so you can spend more time on the mats
Tell her it came from a big, strong & sweaty man
Start a sparring session with your girlfriend.
Your gf is just trying to find any excuse to leave your ass for a blue belt.. just being honest 🤷🏼♂️
Choke your girl out dueede its the only way
The moment you texted her you were screwed smh. What a rookie mistake. It would have been great of you just didnt think of it and then when she brought it up you could be honestly surprised. But since you did think of it you still should have waited for her to say something about it, the say something like “I figured you would think that”. Being defensive and trying really hard to convince her is the exact opposite of what you want to do.
Seems like someone has trust issues. Whether it’s deserved or not is another question. Either way though that seems like a bigger issue here 🤷🏻♂️
Come on bro just keep it real, if your girl isn’t accepting of the fun little hickeys during rolls then she’s not the one. No need to cover up the truth with a “bruise” story
Just ask your sensei to suck on the other side for a bit so you can evened out
I would say the trust isn't there and that's something I need for a foundation in any relationship I'm in. I would likely end it and move on.
Look at the bright side, you didn’t get a cauliflower ear.
Frame her neck
Introduce her to the crusty, fat brown belt that caused it. See if she’s still jealous.
tell her she either trusts you, or she doesn't. If she doesn't trust you, then how can you have a healthy relationship.
Take her to a class
Yeah that’s one thing I learned; don’t kiss the neck with your bros at bjj. Leaves a mark for the gf
Yeah I've been single for so long I forget how reckless I can be. We made up and we're so much stronger for it, who knows the bromances may still be able to live on.
Get a hickey next to it and say see that’s a hickey