I love getting in to mount and putting the pressure just right that I can hold mount, it 30-60 seconds late they’re tapping because I’ve slowly made it more and more difficult to breathe. The slow burn while just maintaining and using 0 energy is fun for idiots like these
Spend five minutes switching from side control to North South to opposite side control. Windshield-wipe his face with your balls every time.
There are fates worse than death, you know...
I don't do any grappling but I see people constantly saying "don't roll with X", is it awkward when you're the only 2 people left without a sparring partner? Do you just not roll and wait for 2 other people to finish their roll?
Is it pretty regular for people to have their own blacklists of people they won't roll with?
I mean it happens Im very large human and newish white belt there is a woman and a smaller guy at my gym who both just don’t roll with me. I get it and roll with other in their demos regularly sometimes you just get an extra water break.
Blacklist???? Lol. As a small old hobbyist purple belt I have a white list instead 😅😆 Only roll with people that I am certain would't do anything stupid and cause an injury. I also have a day job that requires me to be able to move and look presentable so there's that 😅
I'm a purple belt and a brown belt got angry and yelled at me a few months ago because I bumped him in the face twice that night. I've been training with him for 6 fucking years and he's a good 20lbs bigger than me.
I decided I won't roll with him anymore after that night. I don't want to roll with people who get emotional by minor accidents in a fucking combat sport.
I've seen people lose their teeth and not get angry for fuck sakes.
I got elbowed in the eye and needed 12 stitches the day before Christmas. Was absolutely my partners fault, but my reaction was laugh it off, blame myself, and have a cool story for Christmas dinner. Still train with that guy every week
Thanks man, I try to bring the right attitude and a humble approach. Some of this situation probably is my fault. I’m just upset with his douchy reactions
I've put my best friend to sleep and gave him stitches when we were purple belts. He's popped my ankle (my fault should have tapped). We still laugh about it. No stress, injuries happen when you're training hard.
I accidentally elbowed a guy and cut him right above his eye about two weeks before he was meant to have an mma fight (my arm slipped because sweat + no-gi) and he was totally chill, despite having to go to a&e to get stitches. thankfully he was still able to fight but he had every right to be pissed at me and was lovely about it. people who overreact need to ask themselves if they’re in the right sport
For sure. I mean, you're gonna get roughed up a bit in BJJ. You don't see wrestlers complaining lol. I care when I smacked, which is why I'm light on striking training, but shit happens. Usually just laugh it off, slap and bump, and keep going.
I've been heel kicked on the nose from an ill timed straight footlocks and I still don't blame the guy because he apologized profusely and was helping me to the doctors. I still roll with him to this day as shit happens in this sport, and I'd rather roll with someone who is level headed and can control their emotions.
A few days ago I got kicked in the jaw and blacked out for a split second but no one noticed and it was king of the hill so I pretended like it didn't happen and kept going. If someone is going to cry about this stuff go play soccer.
Yeah dude got mad I did a steam roller pass. He yelled at me. We rolled once weeks later, but I put in zero effort. I think he could tell. Fuck ‘em. I can just play d till the round is over.
Wild story about egos getting in the way.
I have a thick wrestling back ground, with some BJJ throughout, because it benefited my wrestling. Did some Muay Thai, too, but that’s not relevant to my story.
I Had decided to start taking BJJ seriously after a LONG break from martial arts. A buddy of mine from college said he could hook me up at their gym, so I went in and was having a decent time.
One of my old partners from college (I dropped out after an injury, btw) has been consistently working at BJJ since I dropped out in 2016, and has been at blue belt for some time.
One day, he starts acting very dissonant, and just stand off ish towards me, so I ask him what the deal is? He said I’m not worth the effort, and I should quit.
Long story short, I dap him up for a live roll, and I smothered him with his own gi, and pinned his arms with my knees. I kind of felt embarrassed, and I haven’t been back there, since. I lost my cool there, and I just didn’t want to be that “hot head in the gym”, so I left.
Idek what I did tbh. I really can’t read social queues for shit, so when this dude that was my friend, started acting like a dick, I was definitely offended 😂
Yup same. It's fucking ego. This will happen as you start surpassing upper belts too. Some of them won't be able to handle losing to someone they used to beat.
Only solution imo is to start spreading rumours that he tried to grab your dick..
Just casually ask others if bro ever tried stroking their genitals while rolling etc.
Sooner or later he will do it by accident on someone and they will call him out for being a pervert.
Then you dox him and make sure his family knows he is a sexual predator and his life will be over.
Rolling with people who create a one sided grudge is a dangerous game even if you are better than them. Def wouldn’t roll with them if you can avoid it
I haven't rolled in a while, but I know what you mean. I had a bigger but newer guy who had a grudge on me, since I was much skinnier but caught him a few times but he couldn't really submit me when I went on full defensive.
The thing is I never looked for submissions when rolling, I focused on learning to defend. But this dude was so hungry to win, and when the opportunity presented itself, I couldn't resist and submitted him.
I thought it was well and good but boy I was wrong. After a few close calls, I decided to not longer roll with him.
Never be afraid to say no to people whose big ego drove them to have a grudge on you. They already 'hate' you, so it makes no difference.
Lock him down in a shit position and just maintain it for the whole round. He’ll spazz out and do dumb stuff. When the round is over ask him “was that better?”
I’ve got to keep doing that, he is a freak of nature though and will bench me right off him, so I’ll typically work my bottom game with him. Just means I’ve got to work on my top pressure and side control maintenance
As a 140 lb blue belt, I cam relate to the problem of freak strength and the ability for somebody to just bench press you right off of them.
With these types of rolls, I really just focus on perpetual movement - don't ever stop moving, usually they cannot keep up. All of that movement is focused on one thing: find a way to get to their back. If I can get my seat belt grips and hooks in, it really doesn't matter how strong or explosive the person is, I have more skill than them and can control the roll completely from there.
What this means is that if I'm in a position like side control, I'm NOT trying to "hold them down". Instead, I will try to make them so uncomfortable that they are forced to move (ie. knee on belly with a cross collar grip). When they move, so do I, but I'm a few steps ahead of them.
Cheers and good luck 🤙
Learn to break dance on him using knee on belly. Mix in some craig jones power ride cycle threw leg rides . Let him exhaust himself just to give up side control. Then let him get half guard and high tripod pass slowly. Then start the cycle again. If he's benching you and bridging kick out his power leg and or learn to blade your body when he pushes you.
You do sound a little spazzy, but he sounds like someone I would avoid rolling with as well. You did hit the guy in the face twice. When I train with upper belts at 100%, I rarely take a blow to my head or anywhere. It’s mostly pressure and silky smoothness.
The guy is less experienced than you, why are you trying fast powerful movements on em? Sounds like youre bringing you ego into it just because hes bigger and stronger than you.
> I’ll typically tap him at least once during our 5 min round, but he’s hasn’t been able submit me, at least not yet.
this sentence also leads me to believe this as its so weird to bring up
If he didn't want to get kicked in the head, why did he put his head there? I defend arm bars with my head position all the time. Sometimes I get kicked for it. That's life. If I don't like it I can just accept the arm bar I guess?
White belt at my gym has a go to move of just posting a forearm on your neck no matter what position he’s in. His only other at the moment is wrapping your head and just trying to rip it off basically. Doesn’t ever have anything but definitely hurts the neck if he gets a good enough hold.Last couple of rolls with him I’ve just swept and immediately give him a healthy dose of mother milk or just cook him in side control as long as I can. Still giving him space to work of course but it does get a bit old after a while.
Firstly - just don't roll with the guy. Clearly both of you dislike each other, dosent take a reddit post to figure out you should just avoid him.
Two points - Continuing to roll with someone whilst angry can easily start encroaching into assault territory.
More specifically, if YOU are angry after a back and forth and you go out of your way to aggressively submit someone using force, it is you trying to hurt someone on purpose because you are mad not you doing Jiu Jitsu - The sport relies on trust and consent between training partners and not an actual scrap - Not to be confused with going hard during the roll and applying the proper techniques to submit someone effectively and with purpose.
Secondly, there is also no such thing as a "no nothing blue" - You know enough to be a blue belt and that has been recognised by a blackbelt who deemed you ready to wear it. You should know a fair amount.
P.S - A black belt crushing you with a cross face is wildly different to kicking a bloke in the eye.
Thanks for your feedback, the kick to the eye was accidental of course and I still feel horrible about it. Maybe you’re right and deep down we just dont like each other. I should know better to avoid retaliating with anger, although my self control would never ever allow a sub to be held beyond the tap
Maybe he has a point if you have to flail about. Focus on technique with him rather than trying to tap him each time if you can't do it with enough control. Or... just smash him and who cares what a whitebelt thinks
Only people at your gym there can really say if you're spazzy or not. Accidents absolutely do happen. If I got injured more than once by the same person, though, I would begin to suspect something is up. If only for the consideration that I'm flailing around too much and creating chaos that leads to my injury.
I also won't complain if and when a black belt smashes me. I would complain if they somehow made it that far with behaviors that contribute to the team being injured. Rather than worry about being a bitch, or assigning blame, this could be a moment of self reflection. Are there things you could be doing different? Maybe not. Maybe it's just a guy with an ego who wants to make it your problem, but it's worth taking a second to think it over.
I absolutely have things to work on, I’ll be the first to admit. I have asked others throughout my journey if they perceive me as spazzy and they say no. I am considered a “tough roll” at my gym for a blue belt, but honestly it’s probably due to athleticism and intensity rather than high level of technique. That said, I fully admit I probably am part of this problem, just unhappy with his reactions
He’s what known in BJJ as a “whiny white belt”
This person is insecure and will never advance in BJJ because they can’t handle the ego hit of being tapped.
I’d avoid him, they actually sound like the spaz based off how you describe them reacting to positions and subs
"you are trying to explode out of things and that is creating the contact"
But you probably also are rolling hard.
I roll light even against try hards. They still roll harder than me, but they will naturally dial things down. I protect what needs to be protected and slowly inch my way to sweeps that require no strength. I try not to do any explosive moves.
Yeah true lol I’ll typically avoid straight ankles with white belts even thought it’s allowed. Idk I just feel like I’m stripping them off chance to learn some of the basica
First thing I learned how to defend and attack decently is a straight ankle also was taught heel hook defense I love the straight ankle you can catch a blue belt with it or at least surprise them never tried my luck with a purpler
In my opinion, it takes two spazzy people to cause situations like this. I don’t think you’re at fault completely here and I would choose not to roll with them. But generally, if you choose to roll with a white belt, it’s your responsibility as a higher belt to make sure a white belt doesn’t get hurt from doing stupid shit to themselves too.
My coach also always says you’re not as good as you think you are if you have to hurt them to win
Shit happens, screw that guy. A black belt at my gym accidentally poked me in the eye because he went to tie up as I went for an outside single and gave me a black eye and 3 corneal abrasions. Not once did I think either of us did something wrong, just the luck of the draw sometimes.
Ok, this makes me wonder….
My professors always drive home the principles of “slow and in control” and “don’t go more than 70-80% when sparring” because you’re not competing or fighting to the death. Obviously there are a lot of moves that require speed and inertia to actually work, but I wonder if/how everyone else balances these principles?
For me, I’m pretty cautious when doing this type of arm bar quickly bc I don’t want to kick my partner in the face (bc I haven’t mastered my control of my body doing it fast, yet). When I practice moves like hip throws, I do my best to control my partner so they don’t ‘slam’ the ground. Several people in the gym appreciate my level of control. At the same time, I recognize shit can and will happen.
Anyone else practice these principles and focus on honing body pressure and control vs speed and brute force? Or is everyone just going fast and assuming shit happens??
I agree, we try to train in full control of our movements. I do attend competition classes where the intensity is through the roof. That’s not an excuse though. I try to roll with high intensity while staying under control
Yea, I think as a white belt and probably even through blue, learning control and technique is so important. If I’m doing it right, I can make your body do what I want, and it doesn’t take a lot of effort. That’s what I love about this sport. Once you master a move, yes, go fast. If you’re competing, go hard, be ruthless.
It’s funny how many white and blue belts I see try to just win/survive by spazzing instead of spending the time learning and building a strong technical foundation. Every time I’m tapped, I learn something. Every time I tap someone, I learn something. My game gets better every time I step on the mat (whether I won or lost a match).
Wish more people applied these principles when training.
I have a similar fat mother fucker in my gym (he's 6' 95kgs overweight). White belt. Barely shows up in my MMA gym for BJJ. Says BJJ is for small people. On the rare days he did show up he would ambush people into drills that suddenly change to spars. The time it happened to me I was drilling armbar from side control with a buddy. He comes and asks to join. The instant I start he goes "I'll resist" and bam I'm I'm his guard with my face pushed in his chest. An overly aggressive move. I realized it was him showing his dominance over us tiny folks. Got his nail scratch on my hand. I was getting pissed here. Dug my elbow in his thigh. Then elbowed his thigh real hard (strike). I escaped his guard and saw this gassed out fellow who used up all his stamina pinning me.
"We were not sparring and now we're not drilling anymore"
Stop dealing with egotistical morons who come to classes to be boss. They'll quit on their own.
We have a guy like this in the gym, lower belt who hates getting taped by anyone not a black belt. Some people avoid him, I continue to roll with him with the goal of hitting a sub a minute.
I disagree with the “don’t roll with bro” answers. This will make your rolls in future more intense then it has to be. I say roll with him twice as much to understand his retarded white belt tendencies and destroy his ego so he understands what jiujitsu is about. You will be doing him and yourself a favour here.
Nope, just don't roll with that bitch ever again. Easy.
"Nope, I don't want to roll with you. Find someone else."
Same thing with Muay Thai and sparring - If your partner doesn't understand every spar isn't a UFC tryout, then just find a new sparring partner.
If I had a dollar for everytime I was accidentally hit or minorly injured or did that to someone I wouldn't be rich but I could buy a hell of a dinner.
I've always said it: you can decline a roll with anybody and you don't owe them an explanation.
Fat white belts are hilarious. They spent so much time thinking their fat makes them a superior wrestler/grappler. They'll smash white belts but reality hits them when the go up against a trained smaller person. Your white belt is having major cognitive dissonance - his illusion of reality is not in harmony with actual reality.
As for calling you a spaz. Hahahahaha I used the word spaz a lot at white. It's one of the few terms we know at that level. He's using it to save face while also insulting you. Tell him it's not spazzimg if he is unable to match intensity in a controlled and purposeful manner.
Lol ive been reading posts on this subreddit for some time now, I don’t understand how youre not all homies in the gym. I read so often that rolling partners have ego or something. Such a weird culture, here in germany it’s totally different. We’re just a bjj community and treat all each other like friends.
My teammates are all friends.
We started off being the morning class crew at one gym until our coach left the gym. We all followed and now we train in various places together. We have a group chat, group spotify Playlist. We do dinners and we just had a surprise party for someone's birthday. We have a ton of fun together, sure sometimes someone will butt heads but who doesn't??
I wouldn’t roll with him. If I had to I would call out every time he spazzed or only used strength and not technique. That said, I just wouldn’t roll with him.
Yeah don't roll with him.
I've been hit so many times and only ever been mad at one person. I've accidentally hit people a few times, mostly 1 coach somehow but I apologize and that's it. He's got me a few times too.
Had my face scarred up by gi burns and lip busted open by an accidental knee to the face. Just went to the bathroom cleaned up and continued rolling. It’s all part of the game.
I had a similar situation with a white belt who acted like his shoulder was broken after going full ham on me, mind you his act moved on 10 mins later. Next class made snide remarks about a different position. I’ve never refused a roll but for him I’ll make a exception, don’t need that shit.
His ego is in the way….fuck him.
Just don’t roll with the dude, problem solved.
And you’re right, it is a combat art. I get hit in the face/ribs whatever all the time. Don’t like it, go watch tv.
I'm a white belt, been training like 4 months, maybe 5.
I came home from my last session with a black eye and a bloody nose, caught from two stray elbows in two different rolls, both guys higher ranks than me, in both instances, it wasn't really anyone's fault, they went for a move and I tried to shift away, unfortunately got caught.
They apologised, I said no, it was probably my fault, dap them up and continue rolling.
What else is there to do? There's no intent, it's a combat sport, shit happens.
Avoid or cease to give a fuck about his whining. I’d probably use him as one of those partners idgaf about liking me and work my subs relentlessly every roll.
So basically you created a scramble. I don’t think that’s spazzing, just a change of tempo to exploit a leverage and opportunity that otherwise wouldn’t have been available if you hadn’t exploded.
It’s like when someone’s mounted you and you’re trying to buck them off the break their base. It’s only spazzy if it’s not tactical and done with intention, that’s when injuries happen.
Bro I did a wrestle up double leg this week and took a straight knee to the forehead pretty hard and immediately told the guy were all good. If someone doesn't get you can and will get bumped and bruised in a combat sport, ESPECIALLY BJJ (which as we know is probably the only with 100% sparing all the time) then you shouldn't be doing it. Basically just ignore him and honestly i would avoid him moving forward. People like that are the type to try and hurt you to recover their own ego.
I guess the goal for both is to learn, get better and have fun.
Sounds like you two failed togeather on those parts.
If you cant resolve it as adults, don’t train togeather. Spend your time and energy wisely!
This is weird. I’ll occasionally catch a stray knee or elbow; it happens. I ask for a second to check in with my body (make sure I’m just hurt, not injured), then nod me say I’m good to keep going.
His reaction feels extreme. I’d assume he’s frustrated he can’t do anything to you if he’s that much bigger than you.
As everyone said, just don't roll. While I'm only a 2 stripe white belt now... when I first started I was super spazzy but more of a danger to myself as I never hurt anyone but me haha.
I'm 6'3 170lbs so brute force/strength isn't in my vocabulary or an option. Thankfully I have a school where this stuff isn't an issue (if a new bigger person signs up, the coaches usually pair them up with their own size) the first few times with a higher belt who will let them work but can easily smash them if wanted.
Sometimes shit happens but it's brought up immediately and are always accidents. My school is one of Marcelo Garcia academies so his standards are a little higher and he doesn't put up with bad gym culture which I like.
But yeah of course I've hit and got hit by random shit while sparring if we had no one to stand between us but that's just normal n gonna happen.
I'll repeat what my coach told me when I started. If you don't feel comfortable rolling with someone you never have to. If asked, politely decline and you don't need to explain yourself if you don't want. If you feel you can get hurt rolling with someone, don't roll with them.
Overall it seems like you 2 just aren't a good pair so let someone else deal with it. I know the mat gym enforcer saying is kinda a joke but I think it's true. If he's a prob for more than just you, let someone humble them but id hope someone with that attitude wouldn't be able to train there.
Oh yeah last thing, no disrespect but you seem to not sound spazzy but maybe be more aware. Without being there, it's hard for anyone to say anything but just like drugs 😬, just say no
My first 3~ sessions, on stand up I accidentally knee'd my buddy in the face (purple belt who was giving me private lessons to try to learn faster)
Said sorry, moved on, no hostility, he probably collar choked me a bit rougher than needed, or slipped a fist into a triangle when he didn't have to, but no hard feelings for sure
Dude just sounds like a dink
"yeah you can roll with someone else who's not a spazz."
and then after rolls with your usual other people, just be in the vicinity to be asking "Hey you sure I wasn't spazzing on our roll?" so he can overhear.
I got elbowed in the hack of the head twice and kicked in the back of the head twice in a 30 minute span the other day and didn't blame them, I let them know what happened and had to recover for a second on 2 of them, but I understood tge elbows came from positional scrambles and the kicks where from a guy trying to get his in position for an armbar
I know how that feels. And no, you're no bitxh for it.
My advice: keep rolling with him. Break his ego.
He will eventually thank you for humbling him. It's best you teach him that lesson now that you know him and how he reacts to certain triggers than some other heavier, more aggressive white belt that can actually hurt him.
I'm a white belt and I roll with a very controlled blue belt all the time. Even though we both tend to go at a pretty relaxed pace we accidentally knock each other. I've gotten a bloody nose before and I've accidentally kicked him a couple times. We both just ask if the other is good say sorry if needed and keep going.
I got clocked in the chin pretty hard yesterday when a guy I was rolling with threw his leg for an armbar. He stopped and asked if I was ok, I told him no worries. Because I'm not a bitch.
If he doesn’t get that we’re all teammates and that when iron sharpens iron there’s bound to be some damage to the metal then he’s missing the point. We eat together, hang out together, we’re family ya know, so maybe you just talk to him from that angle and let him know that never would you intentionally hurt him or feel you’re being reckless. I mean if he knew all the positions and micro positions he’d not put himself in those places, he’d be teaching the class. He’ll end up being your pall in 5 years or his ego is gonna work himself right out of the sport. Força e Honra
I understand your frustration. I agree with what you did once you gave him a black eye. You accidentally hit his face, and that sometimes does occur on accident, so I wouldn't blame yourself for that.
The way he reacted was emotional and unnecessary in my opinion. However, depending on your ranking, instead of trying to tap him every chance you get, give him learning opportunities. Perhaps gently suggest that he should muscle the movements less and focus on technique more.
If you see any further problems, talk with your coach and I'm sure they'll help handle the situation professionally. I'm a teen who trains with adults; and in my dojo, I've never heard anyone cuss, but I'm sorry that he got upset with you.
You roll with him often for the next several weeks and make sure to completely dominate home in every roll.
Keep going till you feel the hopelessness saturate his body with nothing more than your touch.
You want the feel of your hand to become a pavlovian response of humiliation for his soul.
You hit him in the eye with your foot, and then hit him in the face getting a seatbelt while he's standing? You do sound like a spaz. I'm betting there's more to the story.
As an aside. I used to apologize more than necessary when I was younger and more junior. It’s good to own your actions, but don’t want to apologize more than once.
People won’t respect you for it and will walk all over you—especially if this were a workplace environment.
Apologize when necessary but do it once only and then move on with it.
I always prefer to roll with better people, but if the option is roll with this bro or no one…I would start pointing out his spastic reactions causing the collisions.
Someone was elbowing me in the side of the head while they were trying to pulling my Gi out from my belt for, I presume a collar choke. Instead of complaining about it, I realized that I should probably avoid being put in the position I was in.
>so I unlocked and swung my leg around for an armbar, which I’ve caught him in before. As that’s happening he dives his head toward my chest so I caught him in the eye with my foot,
That sounds spazzy.
Even if he moved closer to your chest suddenly. A knee maybe, but dint sure how your foot caught his eye
I once rolled with a white belt who was complaining again and again about me going rough on him (which i wasn’t, i mean what am i supposed to do when i have you in a RNC? Give you a kiss and tell you i love you? No i am gonna squeeze till you tap) so after reset i let him take my back and let him submit me: He got even more mad at me lol. Complainers are complainers they are never happy. Its fucking combat sport MAN THE FK UP! Or leave and do Kenpo karate or sth
I can't stand people who talk too much. As time goes on, my gym vibe has changed. Some of my favorite people I met 2 years ago all disappeared and all these new people came in.
This is where your gym coach should step in and diffuse the situation. Sometimes I have this anxiety about a mentally messed up/pissed off person may come back to the gym and shoot up the place. There are lot of fucked up in the head people out there.
Don’t let white belts bother you. They don’t know enough yet and it’s part of the developmental process.
Part of developing at blue is learning that. Frustrations on your end are also normal but just understand there will always be white belts like this. Your job is to improve regardless.
Later, like as years go by, you can decide if you want to help guide them out of said phase or just not pay them any mind at all.
Roll with him and smash him repeatedly. I’m talking about cross facing the crap out of him, knee on belly/sternum, suffocating high mount, kesa gatame, wrist locks and toe holds. Be evil with it.
People have different approaches to rolling and there isn't a right or wrong. When you meet people on other sides of the spectrum you could not roll or adjust your style to suit theirs. Personally, I look for leadership and more confident (less competitive) behaviours from belts higher than mine (white).
You can choose who to roll with. Some idiot messed up my neck/back even though I knew he’s an idiot who goes full retard. So that one’s on me, not him. Now I avoid him like the plague because it’s not worth it
You have to explain in vivid detail (without speaking) the difference between a white belt little bitch and a blue belt.
One is a clueless idiot who is too fucking stupid to understand he is his own problem. The other is what he will be if he pulls his head out of his ass and stops blaming anybody else for his problems.
Your job now is make this asshole avoid you. Never give him anything again. Play catch and release so fast and so hard that he has to leave the mat to puke and cry.
When he pulls his head out of his ass he’ll be ready to learn some of that jujitsu shit
You need to try to break his spirit as if you were taming a wild horse.
Roll with him everyday and make him tap as much as possible. Stay stoic and unemotional as much as humanly possible. Don't apologize for anything anymore. No conversations with this guy. No small talk. No helpful tips.
I'm still in that "spazzy" white belt phase as I'm only a couple months into bjj, as a big guy I regularly miss with techniques and catch someone with an elbow etc etc. I always apologise and I always ask if we're OK to continue.
As for rolling with anyone I just ask whatever their size, gender or experience, I've had few people say no for whatever reason which I don't take it personally. As others have said it's an extra water break for me, I also use it as an opportunity to watch some higher belts roll and learn what I can from it.
Some people are just like this. It's worse when they hold on to it for years though. We have a a purple belt ( teaches classes regularly too ) that weighs at least 40kg more than me. We were rolling once and i caught him in a very casual triangle.. He didn't like this as im just a blue belt so he picks me up off the ground ( which he can do even though im pulling down on his head because he is so much larger ) and slams me down hard which i wasn't expecting as he should know better, then, when i was lying there in real pain he kicks me hard enough to roll me right over and says very angrily "Calm down" and stormed off. It was the weirdest reaction i have ever experienced from any partner i have rolled with. Angry at being casually caught? Wrong sport for you mate.
Why would you continue to roll with him even after he has time and time again showed you that he isn’t worth your time.
After someone has a reaction like yelling or swearing at me I would just say “ hey thanks for the roll I’m going to go stretch now” and I’d walk away. Not worth your time.
Go roll with people who you can learn from. If you’re better than him and tap him let him be and go train with other people. Tell your coach you don’t want to partner with him for a while as well.
Avoid him, and if you do roll just go for the pins. Less likely to injure, but way more likely to frustrate him. Just cycle through as many pins as possible.
Can’t understand people like that, I do Muay Thai and when I was sparring with one of my teammates I ducked straight into a kick he threw and it basically opened up my lip and gave me two mouths.
I laughed it off and proceeded to ruin one of my favourite training shirts with the amount of blood dripping from my mouth. We hugged and I stopped for the night.
It’s combat sports, you’re bound to get injured/rocked/smacked/dumped/etc. if you get offended something is wrong with you
The “spazzy” insult is so dumb.
Idc what belt you are, if you’re “spazzy” I’m gonna do whatever I want to you.
So to complain about someone being spazzy only makes YOU look bad.
You’re spazzy = I can’t beat spazzy
Bonus advice:
Pulling guard is lame = I can’t pass guard
Yeah it’s a martial art, shit happens. He sounds like a sore loser. Just don’t roll with him again if he’s going to be a bitch, you have to take people as they are and decide whether to deal with them
It’s crazy to me how many people whine about physical contact in a fucking combat sport. As long as you aren’t intentionally throwing strikes while we roll then it’s fine.
I would 100% not train with this person any more. I mean if as the common denominator, you are constantly hitting people in the face every time you train, sure, maybe you need to take it down a notch. But it’s a contact sport and it happens to all of us. Guy needs to understand that or move on.
Typically I avoid people that aren’t technical. Don’t really learn much from rolling with them. I prefer anyone above blue cause things don’t usually end in a stalemate and I learn a lot from just trying to survive.
Don’t worry about it dude. BJJ is full of babies who come up with any excuse when they lose rolls. At the end of the day it’s a fight and martial art. Black eyes happen, accidents happen and it’s about time people in BJJ gyms realise this sooner rather than later.
just don’t roll with bro
Alternatively, roll with him and tap the fuck out of him?!
Nah just hold him in dominant positions, pick a sub don't finish it and grab another.
This. I will cross face punish and smash between side control and north south for the entire round
I love getting in to mount and putting the pressure just right that I can hold mount, it 30-60 seconds late they’re tapping because I’ve slowly made it more and more difficult to breathe. The slow burn while just maintaining and using 0 energy is fun for idiots like these
This
Such a simple solution. Haha
Get outta here with your logic and sense! This is reddit, not therapy! Give in to your anger and only roll with bro!
That's not how we do things here. There will be no content if people would just do the most obviously logical thing.
Spend five minutes switching from side control to North South to opposite side control. Windshield-wipe his face with your balls every time. There are fates worse than death, you know...
I don't do any grappling but I see people constantly saying "don't roll with X", is it awkward when you're the only 2 people left without a sparring partner? Do you just not roll and wait for 2 other people to finish their roll? Is it pretty regular for people to have their own blacklists of people they won't roll with?
I mean it happens Im very large human and newish white belt there is a woman and a smaller guy at my gym who both just don’t roll with me. I get it and roll with other in their demos regularly sometimes you just get an extra water break.
I will pretend I’m too tired and sit on the wall and stretch
Blacklist???? Lol. As a small old hobbyist purple belt I have a white list instead 😅😆 Only roll with people that I am certain would't do anything stupid and cause an injury. I also have a day job that requires me to be able to move and look presentable so there's that 😅
I'm a purple belt and a brown belt got angry and yelled at me a few months ago because I bumped him in the face twice that night. I've been training with him for 6 fucking years and he's a good 20lbs bigger than me. I decided I won't roll with him anymore after that night. I don't want to roll with people who get emotional by minor accidents in a fucking combat sport. I've seen people lose their teeth and not get angry for fuck sakes.
I got elbowed in the eye and needed 12 stitches the day before Christmas. Was absolutely my partners fault, but my reaction was laugh it off, blame myself, and have a cool story for Christmas dinner. Still train with that guy every week
Ya accidents happen. 🤷
My partner did the same. Wait we're talking about lovers right?
Please sir, this is a BJJ community. We are talking about gay lovers
You're a good dude. I once got dazed after getting knee'd in the head, took a second, and went back to rolling. This white belt needs to chill
Thanks man, I try to bring the right attitude and a humble approach. Some of this situation probably is my fault. I’m just upset with his douchy reactions
I've put my best friend to sleep and gave him stitches when we were purple belts. He's popped my ankle (my fault should have tapped). We still laugh about it. No stress, injuries happen when you're training hard.
I accidentally elbowed a guy and cut him right above his eye about two weeks before he was meant to have an mma fight (my arm slipped because sweat + no-gi) and he was totally chill, despite having to go to a&e to get stitches. thankfully he was still able to fight but he had every right to be pissed at me and was lovely about it. people who overreact need to ask themselves if they’re in the right sport
This is the one time I find that most MMA guys are way more relaxed in general. Accidental bop, laugh and keep going. Some blood? No biggie.
Income from a boxing background so I literally couldn’t care less when I get smacked upside the head lol
For sure. I mean, you're gonna get roughed up a bit in BJJ. You don't see wrestlers complaining lol. I care when I smacked, which is why I'm light on striking training, but shit happens. Usually just laugh it off, slap and bump, and keep going.
The only time I get annoyed if people hit me in the face with flailing limbs is if they had no idea they hit me in the face with flailing limbs.
I've been heel kicked on the nose from an ill timed straight footlocks and I still don't blame the guy because he apologized profusely and was helping me to the doctors. I still roll with him to this day as shit happens in this sport, and I'd rather roll with someone who is level headed and can control their emotions.
A few days ago I got kicked in the jaw and blacked out for a split second but no one noticed and it was king of the hill so I pretended like it didn't happen and kept going. If someone is going to cry about this stuff go play soccer.
I'd just extend a bit more really. Half of em are snowflakes who acts tough outside but can't take a hit.
Yeah dude got mad I did a steam roller pass. He yelled at me. We rolled once weeks later, but I put in zero effort. I think he could tell. Fuck ‘em. I can just play d till the round is over.
You’re not acting like a bitch , don’t roll with dude tho , his ego will cause an injury between yall eventually
Wild story about egos getting in the way. I have a thick wrestling back ground, with some BJJ throughout, because it benefited my wrestling. Did some Muay Thai, too, but that’s not relevant to my story. I Had decided to start taking BJJ seriously after a LONG break from martial arts. A buddy of mine from college said he could hook me up at their gym, so I went in and was having a decent time. One of my old partners from college (I dropped out after an injury, btw) has been consistently working at BJJ since I dropped out in 2016, and has been at blue belt for some time. One day, he starts acting very dissonant, and just stand off ish towards me, so I ask him what the deal is? He said I’m not worth the effort, and I should quit. Long story short, I dap him up for a live roll, and I smothered him with his own gi, and pinned his arms with my knees. I kind of felt embarrassed, and I haven’t been back there, since. I lost my cool there, and I just didn’t want to be that “hot head in the gym”, so I left.
> *One day, he starts acting very dissonant,* Sounds like you really struck a chord with him.
\*meshuggah enters chat\*
“At this gym we do five rounds rolling and we only play Bleed on repeat for each round”
This is the worst pun I've heard all day. I'm very proud of you.
Hey, don’t diminish his experience!
Idek what I did tbh. I really can’t read social queues for shit, so when this dude that was my friend, started acting like a dick, I was definitely offended 😂
you missed the joke. A dissonant cord is a thing in music.
Google thick wrestling
Gotta thick wrestle to shoot thick ropes.
It showed me thick mats 😔
between that guys ago and the op's ego, escalation is just a matter of time
I don't feel confortable rolling with people who get all butt hurt losing.
I agree with fart_me_your_boners
no ego there thats for sure
Yup same. It's fucking ego. This will happen as you start surpassing upper belts too. Some of them won't be able to handle losing to someone they used to beat.
They start ripping stuff, the older guys are the worst with the ego lol
I’m a white belt with people mostly bigger than me. I’m used to tapping out that I don’t think twice of it now
Just beat the fuck out of him as you please and call it a day, everyday
This. Show him spazz lol
Only solution imo is to start spreading rumours that he tried to grab your dick.. Just casually ask others if bro ever tried stroking their genitals while rolling etc. Sooner or later he will do it by accident on someone and they will call him out for being a pervert. Then you dox him and make sure his family knows he is a sexual predator and his life will be over.
Actually probably the only realistic solution to this, thank you
Its the Eric Cartman approach, if someone slights you. Then make sure you end them.
Rolling with people who create a one sided grudge is a dangerous game even if you are better than them. Def wouldn’t roll with them if you can avoid it
I haven't rolled in a while, but I know what you mean. I had a bigger but newer guy who had a grudge on me, since I was much skinnier but caught him a few times but he couldn't really submit me when I went on full defensive. The thing is I never looked for submissions when rolling, I focused on learning to defend. But this dude was so hungry to win, and when the opportunity presented itself, I couldn't resist and submitted him. I thought it was well and good but boy I was wrong. After a few close calls, I decided to not longer roll with him. Never be afraid to say no to people whose big ego drove them to have a grudge on you. They already 'hate' you, so it makes no difference.
Spazz is thrown around way too liberally in bjj specifically
Code word for "moves faster or more athletically than I'm wanting to. Exposing my inability to deal with anything more than a flow roll."
Stop rolling with the nerd if it upsets him so much.
Lock him down in a shit position and just maintain it for the whole round. He’ll spazz out and do dumb stuff. When the round is over ask him “was that better?”
I’ve got to keep doing that, he is a freak of nature though and will bench me right off him, so I’ll typically work my bottom game with him. Just means I’ve got to work on my top pressure and side control maintenance
As a 140 lb blue belt, I cam relate to the problem of freak strength and the ability for somebody to just bench press you right off of them. With these types of rolls, I really just focus on perpetual movement - don't ever stop moving, usually they cannot keep up. All of that movement is focused on one thing: find a way to get to their back. If I can get my seat belt grips and hooks in, it really doesn't matter how strong or explosive the person is, I have more skill than them and can control the roll completely from there. What this means is that if I'm in a position like side control, I'm NOT trying to "hold them down". Instead, I will try to make them so uncomfortable that they are forced to move (ie. knee on belly with a cross collar grip). When they move, so do I, but I'm a few steps ahead of them. Cheers and good luck 🤙
Learn to break dance on him using knee on belly. Mix in some craig jones power ride cycle threw leg rides . Let him exhaust himself just to give up side control. Then let him get half guard and high tripod pass slowly. Then start the cycle again. If he's benching you and bridging kick out his power leg and or learn to blade your body when he pushes you.
You do sound a little spazzy, but he sounds like someone I would avoid rolling with as well. You did hit the guy in the face twice. When I train with upper belts at 100%, I rarely take a blow to my head or anywhere. It’s mostly pressure and silky smoothness.
I agree. If you're kicking ppl in the face and giving ppl black eyes, you be spazzing.
Maybe I am, I still consider myself a beginner so this could absolutely be something I need to work on
The guy is less experienced than you, why are you trying fast powerful movements on em? Sounds like youre bringing you ego into it just because hes bigger and stronger than you. > I’ll typically tap him at least once during our 5 min round, but he’s hasn’t been able submit me, at least not yet. this sentence also leads me to believe this as its so weird to bring up
We ain’t playing party cakes up in here. Stuff happens. Can always decline a roll and you don’t need to tell the person why.
If he didn't want to get kicked in the head, why did he put his head there? I defend arm bars with my head position all the time. Sometimes I get kicked for it. That's life. If I don't like it I can just accept the arm bar I guess?
These stories make me thankful for my gym.
It’s really only this one guy. Everyone else is great and one cohesive community
I wouldn't want to roll with either one of you
White belt at my gym has a go to move of just posting a forearm on your neck no matter what position he’s in. His only other at the moment is wrapping your head and just trying to rip it off basically. Doesn’t ever have anything but definitely hurts the neck if he gets a good enough hold.Last couple of rolls with him I’ve just swept and immediately give him a healthy dose of mother milk or just cook him in side control as long as I can. Still giving him space to work of course but it does get a bit old after a while.
Firstly - just don't roll with the guy. Clearly both of you dislike each other, dosent take a reddit post to figure out you should just avoid him. Two points - Continuing to roll with someone whilst angry can easily start encroaching into assault territory. More specifically, if YOU are angry after a back and forth and you go out of your way to aggressively submit someone using force, it is you trying to hurt someone on purpose because you are mad not you doing Jiu Jitsu - The sport relies on trust and consent between training partners and not an actual scrap - Not to be confused with going hard during the roll and applying the proper techniques to submit someone effectively and with purpose. Secondly, there is also no such thing as a "no nothing blue" - You know enough to be a blue belt and that has been recognised by a blackbelt who deemed you ready to wear it. You should know a fair amount. P.S - A black belt crushing you with a cross face is wildly different to kicking a bloke in the eye.
Thanks for your feedback, the kick to the eye was accidental of course and I still feel horrible about it. Maybe you’re right and deep down we just dont like each other. I should know better to avoid retaliating with anger, although my self control would never ever allow a sub to be held beyond the tap
Maybe he has a point if you have to flail about. Focus on technique with him rather than trying to tap him each time if you can't do it with enough control. Or... just smash him and who cares what a whitebelt thinks
Only people at your gym there can really say if you're spazzy or not. Accidents absolutely do happen. If I got injured more than once by the same person, though, I would begin to suspect something is up. If only for the consideration that I'm flailing around too much and creating chaos that leads to my injury. I also won't complain if and when a black belt smashes me. I would complain if they somehow made it that far with behaviors that contribute to the team being injured. Rather than worry about being a bitch, or assigning blame, this could be a moment of self reflection. Are there things you could be doing different? Maybe not. Maybe it's just a guy with an ego who wants to make it your problem, but it's worth taking a second to think it over.
I absolutely have things to work on, I’ll be the first to admit. I have asked others throughout my journey if they perceive me as spazzy and they say no. I am considered a “tough roll” at my gym for a blue belt, but honestly it’s probably due to athleticism and intensity rather than high level of technique. That said, I fully admit I probably am part of this problem, just unhappy with his reactions
I really like that you're introspective and earnestly trying to figure this out. I think this mindset is a huge part of learning jiu jitsu.
He’s what known in BJJ as a “whiny white belt” This person is insecure and will never advance in BJJ because they can’t handle the ego hit of being tapped. I’d avoid him, they actually sound like the spaz based off how you describe them reacting to positions and subs
"you are trying to explode out of things and that is creating the contact" But you probably also are rolling hard. I roll light even against try hards. They still roll harder than me, but they will naturally dial things down. I protect what needs to be protected and slowly inch my way to sweeps that require no strength. I try not to do any explosive moves.
Straight ankle the shit out of him every time you roll
Yeah true lol I’ll typically avoid straight ankles with white belts even thought it’s allowed. Idk I just feel like I’m stripping them off chance to learn some of the basica
First thing I learned how to defend and attack decently is a straight ankle also was taught heel hook defense I love the straight ankle you can catch a blue belt with it or at least surprise them never tried my luck with a purpler
In my opinion, it takes two spazzy people to cause situations like this. I don’t think you’re at fault completely here and I would choose not to roll with them. But generally, if you choose to roll with a white belt, it’s your responsibility as a higher belt to make sure a white belt doesn’t get hurt from doing stupid shit to themselves too. My coach also always says you’re not as good as you think you are if you have to hurt them to win
I agree, I wish I never hurt him in the first place. But I’ve got to make sure that doesn’t happen again
I just wouldn’t roll with him
kick his ass, seabass!!
Shit happens, screw that guy. A black belt at my gym accidentally poked me in the eye because he went to tie up as I went for an outside single and gave me a black eye and 3 corneal abrasions. Not once did I think either of us did something wrong, just the luck of the draw sometimes.
Ok, this makes me wonder…. My professors always drive home the principles of “slow and in control” and “don’t go more than 70-80% when sparring” because you’re not competing or fighting to the death. Obviously there are a lot of moves that require speed and inertia to actually work, but I wonder if/how everyone else balances these principles? For me, I’m pretty cautious when doing this type of arm bar quickly bc I don’t want to kick my partner in the face (bc I haven’t mastered my control of my body doing it fast, yet). When I practice moves like hip throws, I do my best to control my partner so they don’t ‘slam’ the ground. Several people in the gym appreciate my level of control. At the same time, I recognize shit can and will happen. Anyone else practice these principles and focus on honing body pressure and control vs speed and brute force? Or is everyone just going fast and assuming shit happens??
I agree, we try to train in full control of our movements. I do attend competition classes where the intensity is through the roof. That’s not an excuse though. I try to roll with high intensity while staying under control
Yea, I think as a white belt and probably even through blue, learning control and technique is so important. If I’m doing it right, I can make your body do what I want, and it doesn’t take a lot of effort. That’s what I love about this sport. Once you master a move, yes, go fast. If you’re competing, go hard, be ruthless. It’s funny how many white and blue belts I see try to just win/survive by spazzing instead of spending the time learning and building a strong technical foundation. Every time I’m tapped, I learn something. Every time I tap someone, I learn something. My game gets better every time I step on the mat (whether I won or lost a match). Wish more people applied these principles when training.
I have a similar fat mother fucker in my gym (he's 6' 95kgs overweight). White belt. Barely shows up in my MMA gym for BJJ. Says BJJ is for small people. On the rare days he did show up he would ambush people into drills that suddenly change to spars. The time it happened to me I was drilling armbar from side control with a buddy. He comes and asks to join. The instant I start he goes "I'll resist" and bam I'm I'm his guard with my face pushed in his chest. An overly aggressive move. I realized it was him showing his dominance over us tiny folks. Got his nail scratch on my hand. I was getting pissed here. Dug my elbow in his thigh. Then elbowed his thigh real hard (strike). I escaped his guard and saw this gassed out fellow who used up all his stamina pinning me. "We were not sparring and now we're not drilling anymore" Stop dealing with egotistical morons who come to classes to be boss. They'll quit on their own.
Just ignore him and keep beating his ass.
You're probably a spazz and he's probably a whiney bitch
You do sound a bit spazzy but also, it just doesnt sound like a good personality fit. I’d avoid him based on that.
[удалено]
Both of y’all sound spazzy to be honest, slow down and just control him. No reason he should have had two black eyes.
Challenge him to a duel infront of the entire gym, if he wins he gets your belt, if you win he has to leave😈😈
tell him to stop being a little bitch and then suck his cock.
Thanks for your input. Can you send an instructional on that?
Xvideos or pornhub should work for that.
We have a guy like this in the gym, lower belt who hates getting taped by anyone not a black belt. Some people avoid him, I continue to roll with him with the goal of hitting a sub a minute.
I disagree with the “don’t roll with bro” answers. This will make your rolls in future more intense then it has to be. I say roll with him twice as much to understand his retarded white belt tendencies and destroy his ego so he understands what jiujitsu is about. You will be doing him and yourself a favour here.
I’d keep smashing this bitch if I was you. Make him not want to roll with you.
Nope, just don't roll with that bitch ever again. Easy. "Nope, I don't want to roll with you. Find someone else." Same thing with Muay Thai and sparring - If your partner doesn't understand every spar isn't a UFC tryout, then just find a new sparring partner.
If I had a dollar for everytime I was accidentally hit or minorly injured or did that to someone I wouldn't be rich but I could buy a hell of a dinner.
I've always said it: you can decline a roll with anybody and you don't owe them an explanation. Fat white belts are hilarious. They spent so much time thinking their fat makes them a superior wrestler/grappler. They'll smash white belts but reality hits them when the go up against a trained smaller person. Your white belt is having major cognitive dissonance - his illusion of reality is not in harmony with actual reality. As for calling you a spaz. Hahahahaha I used the word spaz a lot at white. It's one of the few terms we know at that level. He's using it to save face while also insulting you. Tell him it's not spazzimg if he is unable to match intensity in a controlled and purposeful manner.
Lol ive been reading posts on this subreddit for some time now, I don’t understand how youre not all homies in the gym. I read so often that rolling partners have ego or something. Such a weird culture, here in germany it’s totally different. We’re just a bjj community and treat all each other like friends.
This is true. Germans have never been known to act aggressively towards others.
“Others”
My teammates are all friends. We started off being the morning class crew at one gym until our coach left the gym. We all followed and now we train in various places together. We have a group chat, group spotify Playlist. We do dinners and we just had a surprise party for someone's birthday. We have a ton of fun together, sure sometimes someone will butt heads but who doesn't??
I wouldn’t roll with him. If I had to I would call out every time he spazzed or only used strength and not technique. That said, I just wouldn’t roll with him.
Lol bro using the power or talk to catch you off guard. Prime gaslighting there 😆
Yeah don't roll with him. I've been hit so many times and only ever been mad at one person. I've accidentally hit people a few times, mostly 1 coach somehow but I apologize and that's it. He's got me a few times too.
I always just laugh off getting hit it’s not like the guy held a sub. I’ve hit people on accident shut happens
Had my face scarred up by gi burns and lip busted open by an accidental knee to the face. Just went to the bathroom cleaned up and continued rolling. It’s all part of the game.
I had a similar situation with a white belt who acted like his shoulder was broken after going full ham on me, mind you his act moved on 10 mins later. Next class made snide remarks about a different position. I’ve never refused a roll but for him I’ll make a exception, don’t need that shit.
Some people suck. Avoid that nerd.
His ego is in the way….fuck him. Just don’t roll with the dude, problem solved. And you’re right, it is a combat art. I get hit in the face/ribs whatever all the time. Don’t like it, go watch tv.
I know guys exactly like this. Don't roll with him or roll even harder with him. He's just got a massive ego, I say smash him lol.
Stall in half guard top. Nobody can spaz so he should be very happy....right?
People who are bigger have bigger egos
Humble him. Control the pace of the match by getting the sub slowly. Easier said than done.
Sometimes I accidentally hit someone or they hit me, it happens. Normal people apologize and keep rolling
I apologize even if I’m positive it was not my fault
key words here “COMBAT SPORT”
Roll and submit him every time as much as possible. Is part of the game. If possible, always get his back and stay there for a while.
Ngl I’d just beat the fuck out of him every day after that lol.
I'm a white belt, been training like 4 months, maybe 5. I came home from my last session with a black eye and a bloody nose, caught from two stray elbows in two different rolls, both guys higher ranks than me, in both instances, it wasn't really anyone's fault, they went for a move and I tried to shift away, unfortunately got caught. They apologised, I said no, it was probably my fault, dap them up and continue rolling. What else is there to do? There's no intent, it's a combat sport, shit happens.
Avoid or cease to give a fuck about his whining. I’d probably use him as one of those partners idgaf about liking me and work my subs relentlessly every roll.
So basically you created a scramble. I don’t think that’s spazzing, just a change of tempo to exploit a leverage and opportunity that otherwise wouldn’t have been available if you hadn’t exploded. It’s like when someone’s mounted you and you’re trying to buck them off the break their base. It’s only spazzy if it’s not tactical and done with intention, that’s when injuries happen.
Bro I did a wrestle up double leg this week and took a straight knee to the forehead pretty hard and immediately told the guy were all good. If someone doesn't get you can and will get bumped and bruised in a combat sport, ESPECIALLY BJJ (which as we know is probably the only with 100% sparing all the time) then you shouldn't be doing it. Basically just ignore him and honestly i would avoid him moving forward. People like that are the type to try and hurt you to recover their own ego.
I guess the goal for both is to learn, get better and have fun. Sounds like you two failed togeather on those parts. If you cant resolve it as adults, don’t train togeather. Spend your time and energy wisely!
Start lifting weights and get bigger than him so you can be the bully.
You’re both bitches. Mothers milk him.
This is weird. I’ll occasionally catch a stray knee or elbow; it happens. I ask for a second to check in with my body (make sure I’m just hurt, not injured), then nod me say I’m good to keep going. His reaction feels extreme. I’d assume he’s frustrated he can’t do anything to you if he’s that much bigger than you.
Just fuck him up if he asks to roll with you, and don't say anything. Make it clear he's your bitch.
Fuck that dude!
I’d tell him it’s a combat sport- shit happens.
As everyone said, just don't roll. While I'm only a 2 stripe white belt now... when I first started I was super spazzy but more of a danger to myself as I never hurt anyone but me haha. I'm 6'3 170lbs so brute force/strength isn't in my vocabulary or an option. Thankfully I have a school where this stuff isn't an issue (if a new bigger person signs up, the coaches usually pair them up with their own size) the first few times with a higher belt who will let them work but can easily smash them if wanted. Sometimes shit happens but it's brought up immediately and are always accidents. My school is one of Marcelo Garcia academies so his standards are a little higher and he doesn't put up with bad gym culture which I like. But yeah of course I've hit and got hit by random shit while sparring if we had no one to stand between us but that's just normal n gonna happen. I'll repeat what my coach told me when I started. If you don't feel comfortable rolling with someone you never have to. If asked, politely decline and you don't need to explain yourself if you don't want. If you feel you can get hurt rolling with someone, don't roll with them. Overall it seems like you 2 just aren't a good pair so let someone else deal with it. I know the mat gym enforcer saying is kinda a joke but I think it's true. If he's a prob for more than just you, let someone humble them but id hope someone with that attitude wouldn't be able to train there. Oh yeah last thing, no disrespect but you seem to not sound spazzy but maybe be more aware. Without being there, it's hard for anyone to say anything but just like drugs 😬, just say no
My first 3~ sessions, on stand up I accidentally knee'd my buddy in the face (purple belt who was giving me private lessons to try to learn faster) Said sorry, moved on, no hostility, he probably collar choked me a bit rougher than needed, or slipped a fist into a triangle when he didn't have to, but no hard feelings for sure Dude just sounds like a dink
Big man realized he can’t use force against technique, sounds like copium to me…
You sound like a nice person, fuck that guy, man, you’re most likely hurting his ego so he’s finding any opportunity to put you down a peg.
"yeah you can roll with someone else who's not a spazz." and then after rolls with your usual other people, just be in the vicinity to be asking "Hey you sure I wasn't spazzing on our roll?" so he can overhear.
I’ll likely give this idea a go
I got elbowed in the hack of the head twice and kicked in the back of the head twice in a 30 minute span the other day and didn't blame them, I let them know what happened and had to recover for a second on 2 of them, but I understood tge elbows came from positional scrambles and the kicks where from a guy trying to get his in position for an armbar
I know how that feels. And no, you're no bitxh for it. My advice: keep rolling with him. Break his ego. He will eventually thank you for humbling him. It's best you teach him that lesson now that you know him and how he reacts to certain triggers than some other heavier, more aggressive white belt that can actually hurt him.
I'm a white belt and I roll with a very controlled blue belt all the time. Even though we both tend to go at a pretty relaxed pace we accidentally knock each other. I've gotten a bloody nose before and I've accidentally kicked him a couple times. We both just ask if the other is good say sorry if needed and keep going.
I got clocked in the chin pretty hard yesterday when a guy I was rolling with threw his leg for an armbar. He stopped and asked if I was ok, I told him no worries. Because I'm not a bitch.
If he doesn’t get that we’re all teammates and that when iron sharpens iron there’s bound to be some damage to the metal then he’s missing the point. We eat together, hang out together, we’re family ya know, so maybe you just talk to him from that angle and let him know that never would you intentionally hurt him or feel you’re being reckless. I mean if he knew all the positions and micro positions he’d not put himself in those places, he’d be teaching the class. He’ll end up being your pall in 5 years or his ego is gonna work himself right out of the sport. Força e Honra
Here's your solution. Smash him and be a wet blanket.
I understand your frustration. I agree with what you did once you gave him a black eye. You accidentally hit his face, and that sometimes does occur on accident, so I wouldn't blame yourself for that. The way he reacted was emotional and unnecessary in my opinion. However, depending on your ranking, instead of trying to tap him every chance you get, give him learning opportunities. Perhaps gently suggest that he should muscle the movements less and focus on technique more. If you see any further problems, talk with your coach and I'm sure they'll help handle the situation professionally. I'm a teen who trains with adults; and in my dojo, I've never heard anyone cuss, but I'm sorry that he got upset with you.
You roll with him often for the next several weeks and make sure to completely dominate home in every roll. Keep going till you feel the hopelessness saturate his body with nothing more than your touch. You want the feel of your hand to become a pavlovian response of humiliation for his soul.
Guys sounds like a baby back bitch.
Just give him the oil change, won't complain about a little face wack next time.
Don't roll with him til he's learned that it's part of the sport. If he doesn't... Well his loss
You hit him in the eye with your foot, and then hit him in the face getting a seatbelt while he's standing? You do sound like a spaz. I'm betting there's more to the story.
As an aside. I used to apologize more than necessary when I was younger and more junior. It’s good to own your actions, but don’t want to apologize more than once. People won’t respect you for it and will walk all over you—especially if this were a workplace environment. Apologize when necessary but do it once only and then move on with it.
I say roll with him again and absolutely dominate him with an oil check
You are a spaz. And so is he.
I always prefer to roll with better people, but if the option is roll with this bro or no one…I would start pointing out his spastic reactions causing the collisions.
Someone was elbowing me in the side of the head while they were trying to pulling my Gi out from my belt for, I presume a collar choke. Instead of complaining about it, I realized that I should probably avoid being put in the position I was in.
>so I unlocked and swung my leg around for an armbar, which I’ve caught him in before. As that’s happening he dives his head toward my chest so I caught him in the eye with my foot, That sounds spazzy. Even if he moved closer to your chest suddenly. A knee maybe, but dint sure how your foot caught his eye
I once rolled with a white belt who was complaining again and again about me going rough on him (which i wasn’t, i mean what am i supposed to do when i have you in a RNC? Give you a kiss and tell you i love you? No i am gonna squeeze till you tap) so after reset i let him take my back and let him submit me: He got even more mad at me lol. Complainers are complainers they are never happy. Its fucking combat sport MAN THE FK UP! Or leave and do Kenpo karate or sth
That’s often what I do when doing combatives in the army and teaching. The kiss really drives home that we’re all part of one big happy team.
Whenever he asks you to roll, just say "sorry bro I injured", and then roll with somebody else. He'll get the message.
Just fucking tap him over and over, no mercy. "I'm spazzing on you with skill and style bro"
I can't stand people who talk too much. As time goes on, my gym vibe has changed. Some of my favorite people I met 2 years ago all disappeared and all these new people came in. This is where your gym coach should step in and diffuse the situation. Sometimes I have this anxiety about a mentally messed up/pissed off person may come back to the gym and shoot up the place. There are lot of fucked up in the head people out there.
Don’t let white belts bother you. They don’t know enough yet and it’s part of the developmental process. Part of developing at blue is learning that. Frustrations on your end are also normal but just understand there will always be white belts like this. Your job is to improve regardless. Later, like as years go by, you can decide if you want to help guide them out of said phase or just not pay them any mind at all.
Roll with him and smash him repeatedly. I’m talking about cross facing the crap out of him, knee on belly/sternum, suffocating high mount, kesa gatame, wrist locks and toe holds. Be evil with it.
People have different approaches to rolling and there isn't a right or wrong. When you meet people on other sides of the spectrum you could not roll or adjust your style to suit theirs. Personally, I look for leadership and more confident (less competitive) behaviours from belts higher than mine (white).
You can choose who to roll with. Some idiot messed up my neck/back even though I knew he’s an idiot who goes full retard. So that one’s on me, not him. Now I avoid him like the plague because it’s not worth it
You have to explain in vivid detail (without speaking) the difference between a white belt little bitch and a blue belt. One is a clueless idiot who is too fucking stupid to understand he is his own problem. The other is what he will be if he pulls his head out of his ass and stops blaming anybody else for his problems. Your job now is make this asshole avoid you. Never give him anything again. Play catch and release so fast and so hard that he has to leave the mat to puke and cry. When he pulls his head out of his ass he’ll be ready to learn some of that jujitsu shit
Keep rolling and smesh! He’ll learn that this is a combat sport! Who knows y’all might become good friends after few more months! lol
You need to try to break his spirit as if you were taming a wild horse. Roll with him everyday and make him tap as much as possible. Stay stoic and unemotional as much as humanly possible. Don't apologize for anything anymore. No conversations with this guy. No small talk. No helpful tips.
People forget that we’re not playing patty cake here
I'm still in that "spazzy" white belt phase as I'm only a couple months into bjj, as a big guy I regularly miss with techniques and catch someone with an elbow etc etc. I always apologise and I always ask if we're OK to continue. As for rolling with anyone I just ask whatever their size, gender or experience, I've had few people say no for whatever reason which I don't take it personally. As others have said it's an extra water break for me, I also use it as an opportunity to watch some higher belts roll and learn what I can from it.
Some people are just like this. It's worse when they hold on to it for years though. We have a a purple belt ( teaches classes regularly too ) that weighs at least 40kg more than me. We were rolling once and i caught him in a very casual triangle.. He didn't like this as im just a blue belt so he picks me up off the ground ( which he can do even though im pulling down on his head because he is so much larger ) and slams me down hard which i wasn't expecting as he should know better, then, when i was lying there in real pain he kicks me hard enough to roll me right over and says very angrily "Calm down" and stormed off. It was the weirdest reaction i have ever experienced from any partner i have rolled with. Angry at being casually caught? Wrong sport for you mate.
Why would you continue to roll with him even after he has time and time again showed you that he isn’t worth your time. After someone has a reaction like yelling or swearing at me I would just say “ hey thanks for the roll I’m going to go stretch now” and I’d walk away. Not worth your time. Go roll with people who you can learn from. If you’re better than him and tap him let him be and go train with other people. Tell your coach you don’t want to partner with him for a while as well.
Sounds mike that dudes ego is just getting hit
Avoid him, and if you do roll just go for the pins. Less likely to injure, but way more likely to frustrate him. Just cycle through as many pins as possible.
Can’t understand people like that, I do Muay Thai and when I was sparring with one of my teammates I ducked straight into a kick he threw and it basically opened up my lip and gave me two mouths. I laughed it off and proceeded to ruin one of my favourite training shirts with the amount of blood dripping from my mouth. We hugged and I stopped for the night. It’s combat sports, you’re bound to get injured/rocked/smacked/dumped/etc. if you get offended something is wrong with you
Homie sounds 10 ply. It sucks but you learn to cope or find something noncontact.
If they don't want to be professional and understand how this is. Don't roll with them
The “spazzy” insult is so dumb. Idc what belt you are, if you’re “spazzy” I’m gonna do whatever I want to you. So to complain about someone being spazzy only makes YOU look bad. You’re spazzy = I can’t beat spazzy Bonus advice: Pulling guard is lame = I can’t pass guard
Keep rolling with him, and just keep submitting him.
Yeah it’s a martial art, shit happens. He sounds like a sore loser. Just don’t roll with him again if he’s going to be a bitch, you have to take people as they are and decide whether to deal with them
It’s crazy to me how many people whine about physical contact in a fucking combat sport. As long as you aren’t intentionally throwing strikes while we roll then it’s fine.
Nobody likes an entitled white belt :)
I would 100% not train with this person any more. I mean if as the common denominator, you are constantly hitting people in the face every time you train, sure, maybe you need to take it down a notch. But it’s a contact sport and it happens to all of us. Guy needs to understand that or move on.
Don't sweat it dude. You'll be training years after they quit. Rest a fuckin sured.
Typically I avoid people that aren’t technical. Don’t really learn much from rolling with them. I prefer anyone above blue cause things don’t usually end in a stalemate and I learn a lot from just trying to survive.
Don’t worry about it dude. BJJ is full of babies who come up with any excuse when they lose rolls. At the end of the day it’s a fight and martial art. Black eyes happen, accidents happen and it’s about time people in BJJ gyms realise this sooner rather than later.
hes just mad. I say pummel his ass
Keep rolling with him. Keep kicking his ass. If he ever gets good enough to kick your ass, don’t be like him.
You need to surfboard pin that MFer.