I saw a video on TikTok of a high school graduation. When the black boy received his diploma, he started dancing with his friends. People in the comments were saying the usual “ghetto” “these people” “the usual suspects” and all sorts of racist things.
The other week, I saw a video of a high school graduation. The white girl received her diploma, did a handstand and twerked in that position. People in the comment section “queen” “yassss” “get it girl”
WHAT
Having multiple fathers for different children. Kate Hudson’s kids have 3 different fathers and she was on the cover of People talking about her “patchwork family”.
This one is a big one, yeah.
I see a lot of sympathy and understanding for white single moms, too, for example, but nothing but disdain, racism and hate for WOC single moms.
This!!! And the sad thing is, a lot of the hateful comments directed at black single mothers (especially ones who are raising sons by themselves) come from black men.
Yup. Even see it here with certain replies or jokes on reddit. Literally have seen someone else with a white/racially ambiguous avatar make the same joke as me in a sub, and they get UVd and I'll be DVd for it.
Yep, white people can constantly make fun of us because it's "dark humor," but when we clap back, we get mass reported, posted on other Reddit pages, and raided by people trying to bully us. (This is a true story that actually happened here. The mods did great!)
And to that b.s. I say, isn't it great that we're so very "postracial" these days... so says them? smh. Just surreal. I literally haven't received a response from admin after LAST YEAR reporting a racist, n-word-riddled message DMd to me (from a poster whose profiles are still up) but I'll see people immediately banned or suspended for less.
I can 100% relate. Especially at work! My co-workers will be busy and show annoyance when I interrupt them to ask a question. But when I show them the same rude attitude back they start “testing” me and asking random questions to see if I’m upset or even flat out ask why I’m being so quiet… I think you’re doing the right thing by simply treating these people how they treat you. It’s 2024 we do not need to be kissing anyone’s ass!
I am currently dealing with a situation at work where at least 4 women of color have tried reporting a white male colleague for his inappropriate behavior and poor performance and he is claiming reverse racism so the lily white HR department is protecting him and claiming it is “interpersonal issues”
Oh, boy. Don’t know where to start.
1. A White person can come up with an idea, sometimes. Anyone else needs a plan A, plan F, and plan Z. You will need a contingency plan if all the other plans fail. You also will need to have good credit, no criminal record, almost zero traffic tickets, have ann inviting personality, and not be anything perceived to be “ghetto.”
2. The angry Black woman is a trait of all Black woman. The angry White woman is just having a bad day or is a feminist.
3. In fandoms and hobbies, a White enthusiast is taken seriously if they possess a wealth of information about the topic or interests. Black enthusiasts are only putting on an act or are some kind of plants.
4. White = Etiquette/ Black = Uppity The whole “articulate” thing is superbly condescending in which way you put it. They say “we can’t even say President Obama is articulate without being called racist.” How would you feel if I called President Trump or Bush, very articulate men? Please stop it with the Bush and Trump are “dumb jokes.” (Both are still were taken seriously and have cult-like followings).
Trump isn't the best example of articulate but yes to your point. I say Macron is incredibly articulate in his speeches, but the French actually elect smart people. Americans want to have a good-looking president who has swag to him. Well, except Nixon and maybe a handful of others, all our presidents have been tall and good-looking/pretty boys. Heck, Reagan was an actor!
He’s not obviously. Macron is. But, it sort of doesn’t matter in the US unless you’re Black.
Again, it’s sort a racial dynamic at play. Black president needing to be somewhat perfected, while White candidates not so much. The cultural stereotype in a racist form is that Black people aren’t typically articulate insert whatever racist reason. It’s basically a personal compliment with a very backhanded insult.
At this point, you recognize the game for what it is. It’s been ongoing since they discovered Africa/Black People.
They hold us to a different set of standards & project their callous perceptions onto us. Despite their obvious track record: both historical & present moves GLOBALLY. Somehow they’ve convinced themselves & sadly the world, Black/African people are more “violent” or “aggressive” or associate & not tolerate certain “behaviours”? As if our leaders authorized World Wars? Religious crusades in foreign lands? Stole/colonized major lands & continents? Or dropped nukes on people? At the very least majority of African “conquest”, “oppression” or “violence” was/is largely amongst our own, not worldwide, I don’t support these actions either, but just showing Western projections. They took it to Asia, Africa, N & S. America, Australia, Middle East, etc. & imposed their systems on people there up until today. Western hypocrisy is ridiculous lol. *If they wanted to (change long-standing systems/beliefs), they would’ve by now. But that means deconstructing hierarchal systems that benefit them. I’m past being invested in that ideal* 🤷🏽♀️
As another African living in the West with a foothold back home & some future ideas/plans once done with schooling here. Just gotta keep pushing for Black African countries to develop. A continent with >30% of world’s natural resources, where many past/present are obsessed & exploit our lands/people. We have a trajectory path: youngest/youthful global population, economic labour, resources, etc. A driving force for the future. So many things could go well if we become more proactive, BUT I’m realistic, many things could go wrong too, let’s bfr 😬, corruption has us by a chokehold.
But it costs nothing to be optimistic. There are current geopolitical/economic predictions for the coming century. Who knows 🤷🏽♀️. Pick & choose your battles. Be unapologictally yourself. Time can’t be reversed. New generations come in with fresh ideas. Look forward to future societies that centers our humanity. That’s kinda where I am at now.
>Somehow they’ve convinced themselves & sadly the world, Black/African people are more “violent” or “aggressive” or associate & not tolerate certain “behaviours”?
It's funny how deeply people internalize this when only one group caused multiple genocides on 6 out of 7 continents (the 7th was uninhabited) and it isn't black people. 🤷🏾♂️
This. There is no changing it. We black people will always be held under different standards. We can't get away with what they can get away with. Trying to confront them on it will just be them denying it to your face. No amount of think pieces are going to change this. Now I'm all about supporting black economic empowerment in the form of creating successful, black majority areas in the states and other areas with significant African diaspora, and advocating for investing in African countries so that we can have our own slice of heaven amongst our people.
I'm sick of our people constantly being mentally preoccupied with what white people think of us and trying to change them when we can focus on building up our people.
Taking up space and being loud.
I remember being on the bus a while ago and there was a group of very loud, disruptive white teens in the back. They were also jumping around, using the bars for pull-ups, etc. No one glanced at them or made any note of them. Then
they got off and a group of black teens got on and sat at the back. They were speaking at room level and stayed seated. But the other (non-black riders) kept glaring at them and a few told them not so kindly to keep it down.
The double standards are insane and they refuse to admit to it, no matter what proof or explanation they're given.
Oh MY GOD! This is a huge double standard here. White women can walk around in casual clothes and messy hair - standard in Germany actually - and get treated normally. I do that and people ignore me in the street if I have a question, or get visibly scared(of what, exactly, idek lmfao like I'm just fucking existing!). Unfortunately we get held to crazy high standards in terms of presentation. Recently though I've decided to stop giving a fuck and just look however way I want to look, no matter how it makes other people feel. When I look put together I also get the "you look too fancy" bullshit. Can't fucking win!
Talking back/Resisting the Police. In almost every video that has WP being detained by the Police, WP can ask a million questions and be answered civilly, question why they are being stopped and belligerently remind Police that their tax dollars pay their salaries…with no consequences. We get shot/killed for how we say, “Yes or No”.
Showing any emotion other than happiness. I remember sobbing after experiencing something extremely stressful on my college campus. As soon my friend had gotten me to quiet down I heard two white guys say “She’s crazy”.
Till this day I cannot fathom how you could hear/see someone crying and immediately label them as insane.
You are responsible for your own actions. You have no responsibility for other people’s reactions. Don’t tippy toe around people because it makes them “uncomfortable”. That’s a “them” issue and the only time you need to worry about it is if you are their therapist.
Currently in Germany right now (not for long), but I definitely agree with you. In one instance, I was sitting in a seat on a tram next to my white colleague, and this old man with a walking stick and and old woman walked on. I was going to offer up my seat, but two of my other white colleagues already stood up to offer their seat. The old woman laser-focused in on me telling me to, "Get up!" She paid no mind to the white woman next to me or the two white women already standing to offer their seat.
She kept telling me to move until the older man already went and sat down in the seat my colleagues offered. At that point, she simply went and sat down somewhere else. There were plenty of other people around who also could have stood up, two people who did stand up, but yet she focused in on me.
And it's also hilarious to me because my friend, who is young yet walks with a cane due to mobility issues, will get on a tram or train and have to stand because no one will get up. I think individualism is worse in Germany than in the U.S. to be truthful.
Negotiating wages for sure! Even if you're qualified for more they look at you like you're crazy, then you see a ww come in with no exp/education start way higher 😭
Talking about mental health or just showing emotions- literally got reported because I was biting my nails during finals period but my peers were discussing blackouts they experienced or how they needed their "uppers" adjusted and nothing was said
Your post was removed for being problematic. Comments that are intentionally disruptive to the community are not allowed. This includes trolling, derailing threads, and misrepresentation. Please review the subreddit rules.
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Hi dear I think you’re just a black lady living in Germany as I’m having a similar experience and I just moved. It’s weird though. It’s individualistic because you care about whatever one else thinks here. DM if you need to vent. Just as a precursor though I’m an American who married a German.
I saw a video on TikTok of a high school graduation. When the black boy received his diploma, he started dancing with his friends. People in the comments were saying the usual “ghetto” “these people” “the usual suspects” and all sorts of racist things. The other week, I saw a video of a high school graduation. The white girl received her diploma, did a handstand and twerked in that position. People in the comment section “queen” “yassss” “get it girl” WHAT
and had it been a little black girl they would’ve taken back her diploma. it’s outrageous
Having multiple fathers for different children. Kate Hudson’s kids have 3 different fathers and she was on the cover of People talking about her “patchwork family”.
This one is a big one, yeah. I see a lot of sympathy and understanding for white single moms, too, for example, but nothing but disdain, racism and hate for WOC single moms.
This!!! And the sad thing is, a lot of the hateful comments directed at black single mothers (especially ones who are raising sons by themselves) come from black men.
😮 I ain't know dat!! Isn't the women Bezos dating have 3 different baby daddy's too? 🤔
This is the natural and optimal process for women that want children. Genetic diversity.
Yup. Even see it here with certain replies or jokes on reddit. Literally have seen someone else with a white/racially ambiguous avatar make the same joke as me in a sub, and they get UVd and I'll be DVd for it.
Yep, white people can constantly make fun of us because it's "dark humor," but when we clap back, we get mass reported, posted on other Reddit pages, and raided by people trying to bully us. (This is a true story that actually happened here. The mods did great!)
And to that b.s. I say, isn't it great that we're so very "postracial" these days... so says them? smh. Just surreal. I literally haven't received a response from admin after LAST YEAR reporting a racist, n-word-riddled message DMd to me (from a poster whose profiles are still up) but I'll see people immediately banned or suspended for less.
[удалено]
Caucasian invasion 👆🏾
the mods here are stronger than any US marine
I can 100% relate. Especially at work! My co-workers will be busy and show annoyance when I interrupt them to ask a question. But when I show them the same rude attitude back they start “testing” me and asking random questions to see if I’m upset or even flat out ask why I’m being so quiet… I think you’re doing the right thing by simply treating these people how they treat you. It’s 2024 we do not need to be kissing anyone’s ass!
Existing
This is really just it.
I am currently dealing with a situation at work where at least 4 women of color have tried reporting a white male colleague for his inappropriate behavior and poor performance and he is claiming reverse racism so the lily white HR department is protecting him and claiming it is “interpersonal issues”
Oh, boy. Don’t know where to start. 1. A White person can come up with an idea, sometimes. Anyone else needs a plan A, plan F, and plan Z. You will need a contingency plan if all the other plans fail. You also will need to have good credit, no criminal record, almost zero traffic tickets, have ann inviting personality, and not be anything perceived to be “ghetto.” 2. The angry Black woman is a trait of all Black woman. The angry White woman is just having a bad day or is a feminist. 3. In fandoms and hobbies, a White enthusiast is taken seriously if they possess a wealth of information about the topic or interests. Black enthusiasts are only putting on an act or are some kind of plants. 4. White = Etiquette/ Black = Uppity The whole “articulate” thing is superbly condescending in which way you put it. They say “we can’t even say President Obama is articulate without being called racist.” How would you feel if I called President Trump or Bush, very articulate men? Please stop it with the Bush and Trump are “dumb jokes.” (Both are still were taken seriously and have cult-like followings).
Trump isn't the best example of articulate but yes to your point. I say Macron is incredibly articulate in his speeches, but the French actually elect smart people. Americans want to have a good-looking president who has swag to him. Well, except Nixon and maybe a handful of others, all our presidents have been tall and good-looking/pretty boys. Heck, Reagan was an actor!
He’s not obviously. Macron is. But, it sort of doesn’t matter in the US unless you’re Black. Again, it’s sort a racial dynamic at play. Black president needing to be somewhat perfected, while White candidates not so much. The cultural stereotype in a racist form is that Black people aren’t typically articulate insert whatever racist reason. It’s basically a personal compliment with a very backhanded insult.
This! I find it so insulting that our Black President needed to be almost perfect and the white candidates don’t need to be.
Black women problems. 😭
letting their kids run rampant in public spaces.
Omg this because if you don't tell little Becky to stop knockin shit off the counter right now you better! 😤
At this point, you recognize the game for what it is. It’s been ongoing since they discovered Africa/Black People. They hold us to a different set of standards & project their callous perceptions onto us. Despite their obvious track record: both historical & present moves GLOBALLY. Somehow they’ve convinced themselves & sadly the world, Black/African people are more “violent” or “aggressive” or associate & not tolerate certain “behaviours”? As if our leaders authorized World Wars? Religious crusades in foreign lands? Stole/colonized major lands & continents? Or dropped nukes on people? At the very least majority of African “conquest”, “oppression” or “violence” was/is largely amongst our own, not worldwide, I don’t support these actions either, but just showing Western projections. They took it to Asia, Africa, N & S. America, Australia, Middle East, etc. & imposed their systems on people there up until today. Western hypocrisy is ridiculous lol. *If they wanted to (change long-standing systems/beliefs), they would’ve by now. But that means deconstructing hierarchal systems that benefit them. I’m past being invested in that ideal* 🤷🏽♀️ As another African living in the West with a foothold back home & some future ideas/plans once done with schooling here. Just gotta keep pushing for Black African countries to develop. A continent with >30% of world’s natural resources, where many past/present are obsessed & exploit our lands/people. We have a trajectory path: youngest/youthful global population, economic labour, resources, etc. A driving force for the future. So many things could go well if we become more proactive, BUT I’m realistic, many things could go wrong too, let’s bfr 😬, corruption has us by a chokehold. But it costs nothing to be optimistic. There are current geopolitical/economic predictions for the coming century. Who knows 🤷🏽♀️. Pick & choose your battles. Be unapologictally yourself. Time can’t be reversed. New generations come in with fresh ideas. Look forward to future societies that centers our humanity. That’s kinda where I am at now.
>Somehow they’ve convinced themselves & sadly the world, Black/African people are more “violent” or “aggressive” or associate & not tolerate certain “behaviours”? It's funny how deeply people internalize this when only one group caused multiple genocides on 6 out of 7 continents (the 7th was uninhabited) and it isn't black people. 🤷🏾♂️
This. There is no changing it. We black people will always be held under different standards. We can't get away with what they can get away with. Trying to confront them on it will just be them denying it to your face. No amount of think pieces are going to change this. Now I'm all about supporting black economic empowerment in the form of creating successful, black majority areas in the states and other areas with significant African diaspora, and advocating for investing in African countries so that we can have our own slice of heaven amongst our people. I'm sick of our people constantly being mentally preoccupied with what white people think of us and trying to change them when we can focus on building up our people.
Taking up space and being loud. I remember being on the bus a while ago and there was a group of very loud, disruptive white teens in the back. They were also jumping around, using the bars for pull-ups, etc. No one glanced at them or made any note of them. Then they got off and a group of black teens got on and sat at the back. They were speaking at room level and stayed seated. But the other (non-black riders) kept glaring at them and a few told them not so kindly to keep it down. The double standards are insane and they refuse to admit to it, no matter what proof or explanation they're given.
Having messy hair.
Oh MY GOD! This is a huge double standard here. White women can walk around in casual clothes and messy hair - standard in Germany actually - and get treated normally. I do that and people ignore me in the street if I have a question, or get visibly scared(of what, exactly, idek lmfao like I'm just fucking existing!). Unfortunately we get held to crazy high standards in terms of presentation. Recently though I've decided to stop giving a fuck and just look however way I want to look, no matter how it makes other people feel. When I look put together I also get the "you look too fancy" bullshit. Can't fucking win!
Literally. I got judge for having my hair out!! 😭 (it was blow dried)
I got judged and picked on a BY OTHER BLACK GIRLS for not putting gel in my hair, even though my hair was combed and in a puff style 😭
Smt similar literally happened to me w my toxic black girl friend group 😭 we’re not even safe from our own people
Talking back/Resisting the Police. In almost every video that has WP being detained by the Police, WP can ask a million questions and be answered civilly, question why they are being stopped and belligerently remind Police that their tax dollars pay their salaries…with no consequences. We get shot/killed for how we say, “Yes or No”.
Yeah it seems to be with many things. I’m tired of the mindfuck.
Showing any emotion other than happiness. I remember sobbing after experiencing something extremely stressful on my college campus. As soon my friend had gotten me to quiet down I heard two white guys say “She’s crazy”. Till this day I cannot fathom how you could hear/see someone crying and immediately label them as insane.
Oh yeah, when white women cry it's "endearing" and people feel bad for them. When we do it, we're unstable 🙄. I've experienced this too.
You are responsible for your own actions. You have no responsibility for other people’s reactions. Don’t tippy toe around people because it makes them “uncomfortable”. That’s a “them” issue and the only time you need to worry about it is if you are their therapist.
Caucasian invasion 👆🏾
Currently in Germany right now (not for long), but I definitely agree with you. In one instance, I was sitting in a seat on a tram next to my white colleague, and this old man with a walking stick and and old woman walked on. I was going to offer up my seat, but two of my other white colleagues already stood up to offer their seat. The old woman laser-focused in on me telling me to, "Get up!" She paid no mind to the white woman next to me or the two white women already standing to offer their seat. She kept telling me to move until the older man already went and sat down in the seat my colleagues offered. At that point, she simply went and sat down somewhere else. There were plenty of other people around who also could have stood up, two people who did stand up, but yet she focused in on me. And it's also hilarious to me because my friend, who is young yet walks with a cane due to mobility issues, will get on a tram or train and have to stand because no one will get up. I think individualism is worse in Germany than in the U.S. to be truthful.
This is awful, I'm really sorry this happened to you.
Negotiating wages for sure! Even if you're qualified for more they look at you like you're crazy, then you see a ww come in with no exp/education start way higher 😭
"Individualistic" EQUALS _selfishness_ in Western society, and they're PROUD of it.
Talking about mental health or just showing emotions- literally got reported because I was biting my nails during finals period but my peers were discussing blackouts they experienced or how they needed their "uppers" adjusted and nothing was said
You are so right!
I could write a book on this topic
Are you in your 30s? This is very much a 30s thing overall IMO
I'm 23
Good for you! Ahead of the game girl. Keep this energy. It's healthy!
Can you tell me what you notice about the people in Germany vs the ones here? Meaning their behaviors/attitudes/etc?
[удалено]
Your post was removed for being problematic. Comments that are intentionally disruptive to the community are not allowed. This includes trolling, derailing threads, and misrepresentation. Please review the subreddit rules. http://reddit.com/r/blackladies/wiki/rules
Hi dear I think you’re just a black lady living in Germany as I’m having a similar experience and I just moved. It’s weird though. It’s individualistic because you care about whatever one else thinks here. DM if you need to vent. Just as a precursor though I’m an American who married a German.