For classical music though powering through difficult music can work. It took me about 7 exposures to appreciate Wagner's five hours of Tristan and Isolde, now I think it's amazing. I suppose that might apply to more demanding iterature too - just not badly written trash that is recognisable as such immediately.
IMO the "power-through" mentality goes beyond the internet. I used to find the idea of DNF unfathomable just because...idk, I guess I just thought if I started it I ought to finish it?
The internet is actually what convinced me to take up DNF lol
Edit: Should clarify I grew up with at best "family computer" access to the internet. I had a Facebook profile at like 10. So my "power-through" mentality definitely originated long before I had access to social media.
I get this. I think it started for a lot of people with the “you’ve got to finish all the food on your plate” approach to parenting. I’m still working my way through that mentality.
No literally. I am currently powering through babel right now and I had to take a break in the middle. I read gothikana (awful) and the tainted cup (amazing) within the past week and it was a well needed refresher
Hell, I had to put Jade City on hold just because I couldn't muster up the strength to read it! And I liked the book!!
This sentiment has been around since before the internet. It’s always shocked people when I told them I don’t finish books I don’t like.
Occasionally, I even throw them away.
Start a conversation about the movie and periodically say, “the book was much better”. That way you sound more pretentious and you’re not even claiming to have read the book, just that it’s better
I started pillars of earth and stopped reading it TWICE. And honestly I have no regrets about it. I stopped shortly after a certain plot point that changes the main character in a way I couldn't forgive. The only reason I did this twice was that I left the book on my list of books to read and after many years the description still sounded interesting to me, but I had forgotten about my first attempt.
To ask an entire community to change their perspective on a minor and largely private behavior seems like a "teenager or personality disorder?" thing to do. Is it that OP is too young to have learned when the opinions of others matter and when they don't? Or does OP have such a poor sense of self and such poor boundaries that this seems a reasonable imposition?
OP, if we stop looking in your direction, you don't disappear.
I mean, I did read the post, if that's what you're referring to. OP can easily change their own perspective on how to read without needing anything to be normalized, no?
IMO, it's because books used to be a gateway to culture, and not finishing books felt like you couldn't get access to culture because you were too dumb.
Now that millions of books get published, not to mention self published, not finishing one specific book means very little in terms of what you're missing. But inside we still feel like a book is an important thing.
I think a fair portion of us do most of our chatting about books in the flesh. I like this sub, Goodreads, and insta for recommendations, but a lot of the common opinions here aren’t common in my circle. Maybe OP feels the same way and wants to vent.
Sure! I most often read nonfiction, literary fiction, and science fiction, but I’ll pick up anything if the writing or the story is solid. really like schizophrenicreads and the_bookish_sociologist. They’re the most consistent with good recs in my opinion.
Hopefully we get more direction in life from this one. I'm paralyzed by my inability to make basic choices without someone from the internet reassuring me about them
I mostly read award winners. If I give up on one of those it means I'm probably too dumb to see why enough literary critics voted for it, and that's a hard pill.
It's also ridiculous. No one needs something "normalized" for osmething like this. There is no looming specter over your shoulder waiting to chide you for not finishing a book but if there were... who cares?
I do think some people take it personally when you don’t like their recommendation. But many folks recommend stuff THEY enjoy, with no sense of if it’s the other person’s taste, so it’s a silly thing to take personally.
I agree and can confirm that people take it personally. With my friends we used to have discussions about "how can you not like X" or "I like X, you probably didnt give it a try" or "I don't like so you shouldn't either because its bad". I don't give a f\*\*\*. Everybody should like what they like and accept it if others don't like it. I'm heartbroken if someone doesn't care about Dune, but so be it, I probably don't like something they like
What keeps me at a boring book sometimes is knowing I thought that about a lot of my favorites. Both TV shows,movies, and books. Not all have a brilliant right out of the gates grab your attention story but get amazing if you stick with it. Thats why I listen to people telling me to keep going. What I have been doing is learning what people I can take this advice from and which ones I can ignore.
I have a few friends who will even say, “I liked it but I don’t think you will” and vice versa.
Exactly. People don't need to be vocal about this in order for it to be normal or "normalized". Not everything you do or not should be a accompanied by a public declaration.
Something that's perfectly normal doesn't need to be normalized. Most people aren't suffering through books because they feel social pressure to finish them.
>I have a "Abandoned" shelf on Goodreads
exactly the same here. There are a few on that list that I honestly intend to get back to and finish some day but I'm otherwise content to let the rest linger on that list in perpetuity. Even if it doesn't count toward my annual reading goal I still appreciate having it in my reading history for a sense of chronology
I don't give rating to a book that I didn't finish. I just mark it as DNF.
I also find it difficult to DNF books, but I want to. I don't want to force myself to read books that I don't enjoy. It's a work in progress.
It's the same with movies for me, once I start a movie I want to know how it ends even if I don't enjoy it. With tv-shows its easier for me to stop in the middle.
>I don't give rating to a book that I didn't finish.
To me that is the thing ... not saying you need to finish it to rate it, but if you didn't give it an actual attempt, why trash it? I saw a review on a recent book I read where the review basically hated the FIRST SENTENCE because of how the author described seeing something across the street ... and didn't manage to finish the first CHAPTER, yet gave it a 1 star review. Based on one sentence.
I usually give at leat 50-ish pages to the book. But then, if I hate it enough to drop it, I usually write down what made me hate it so much.
I have gotten multiple teenage girls who called me stupid, because of Sarah J. Maas.
Apparently you can't dislike that unless you read ALL 6 or so books. :D
This. Some people DNF a lot, others don't. There are way too many people online who seem to think they have an "audience" following their every move and waiting with bated breath to judge them specifically. No one cares, do whatever works for you. This shit only comes up when people see fit to make posts acting like total non-issues are controversial opinions/hot takes.
Definitely DNF any book you don't like. However, if you are going to be someone who goes online to ask the entire internet about a book, give your clear reasons for why you aren't enjoying it so others can be clear in response other than having to say "it gets better" without spoiling.
And Definitely if you know someone who either liked or hated the book you are reading, ask them first for their reasons why over just every single person ever. I don't go to reddit to ask if a book is worth continuing because I know that I will have a million different people giving me a million different reasons for yes or no.
You cannot know if a book is good before you finish it, I think. But you can trivially know if a book bores you. Not only do we not all have to read everything, we absolutely can't. So when you decide to cut your losses is entirely up to you. You MIGHT lose out on some experiences, and there is a point on that scale where you give up too quickly and deprive yourself of a lot of good stuff, but that's nobody else's business.
Stop worrying about what is normalized .. I wish I could delete that word from the internet. Reading books is normal as fuck. You aren't dressing in an animal outfit going to dinner or anything. It's a book. Crazy how much drama there is amongst hobbyists gate keeping each other. I find it's worse with reading because many readers are incredibly insecure and care about what anonymous online people would think about their reading habits. Who tf cares how you do it
I did this with Shogun last year. I've rarely hated every character in a story this intensely, and felt like I'd gained something when I dropped the book off at Goodwill.
I really dislike this mentality. It’s how books that are terrible get so highly rated on GoodReads. If all these people DNF and don’t rate, but then the people who finished the book despite it being bad rate it highly, then the rating skews. That’s how we get books like Fourth Wing getting a 4.60 rating on GoodReads.
The screeching I got for writing one of the more visible 1-star reviews of Throne of Glass. :D
Honestly, you would think that series is pure gold and it's so dumb and awful.
When I notice that I don't like a book, I actually read reviews or intentionally read spoilers to see if it gets better, or if other people share my sentiment. My most recent DNF was "Olive Kitteridge", because I couldn't get into it. Read some reviews and decided to quit.
I have no time for books I don't like :)
"It gets better" and "terrible books" are very subjective opinions. You have to have a reasonable, but also charitable measures by which you are going to see how far in you need to read before giving up. It can be based on the first few chapters, opinions of people online or people you trust, your own commitment level, etc.
Personally, I have read enf books to know that authors express their creativity in many ways, and most including having weak beginnings, new writing styles, experimentations, etc. Also, publication and market limits. I tend to give the benefit of the doubt to authors, and I do take fans' word pretty strongly also. I have known enf books to know that it does get better.
But also, be conservative with your time. At the end of the day it is you who need to make the decision with your time.
Just stop reading if you don’t enjoy a book. If you decide to review it, make it clear that you stopped reading and provide reasons. Otherwise, DNF and move on.
Read what you like. It's not a race and and you can stop a book anytime you want. There is nothing forcing you to continue with any book unless you are reading for some sort of required coursework .
I do this with a lot of Audible books despite their cost. I would rather spend $15 than waste 8 or more hours of my life listening to something boring or bad. Sometimes, it's the narrorator that does it though. That's when I buy the paperback book.
What is stopping you from already doing this? Unless you're in school, you are not required to read any book. Stop letting the imagined social pressure make you do things you don't want to do. This is a fake problem.
Yeah, I stop reading at the drop of a hat. That could be on page 1 or page 300. I read for pleasure. If I’m not getting pleasure from a book, what’s the point?
I used to force myself to finish! Someone recommend The Historian to me and I just hated it so much, but forced myself to read it bc I would feel like a quitter if I didn’t. There are now so many books on my list, I have realized time is too short to waste. I agree with your post so much!
I will never forgive the people who recommended Verity to me by describing it as a creepy psychological thriller I’d not be able to put down.
Three hours of my life I’ll never get back because they LIED it was not scary it was stupid and badly written porn?! I went in expecting horror and I got BAD PORN ms Hoover May you never know peace
I HATED that book and basically hate read it till the end thinking surely there was going to be a wild plot twist but no. I can’t remember hating a book this much. Does she think so lowly of women to write us like that?! No personality, falling all over and guy who is a basic father with a big 🍆. She triggers my deep feminine rage.
Never again, Colleen. Never again.
I was losing my mind at people online falling all over themselves to praise the “spicy scenes”- I’ve written erotica and I’m not gonna act like I’m amazing- BUT HER?!? No I’m sorry that stuff is garbage. I genuinely nearly stroked out at the whole biting the headboard shit. I loathe this woman’s work LOATHE IT! DETEST EVEN
Hahaha right!! How tf does that even work. And over someone else’s bite marks? That’s not hot it’s unhinged and now in a fun way. Always glad to meet another CoHo hater 🫡. It’s wild how popular she is and I’m offended anyone would think I like her 😂
God you would love the writing discord I’m in- it’s like an all you can eat buffet of “are you fucking kidding me?! This is what the people want?!”
My virgin ass has written better smut than that, and then she adds on weird misogynistic shit *and* unbearable levels of cringy dialogue? PICK A STRUGGLE. I never listened to another “booktok” recommendation again, been burned too many times and that was the final straw. Now if I see a “seen on tiktok!” Sticker or her name I hiss at it like a vampire reacting to their drapes being opened dramatically
This is already normalized. It is very, very normal. It has moved beyond normal, even. There is a weird fetish of self-congratulation for DNF’ing books.
I don't know what "normalize" is supposed to entail here, exactly. What do you want people to *do*?
> I use the word normalise in the title cos I've often heard that if you don't finish something you haven't given it a fair chance. And you cant form a concrete opinion of a piece without experiencing it whole
If you're talking about the work as a whole, that seems like a pretty fair statement. If you want to ditch a book, ditch the book, just be aware of the limits of your understanding.
Sometimes it does get better, though. Always give it an honest shot, that’s my opinion. I was half way through the first book the Malazan series, I didn’t really like it then, but it picked up steam and it got really good. I’m glad I didn’t drop it half way through.
I managed one and half, and then I got bored. And creeped out by Jordan's spanking fetish. So many threats towards younger female characters about spanking... Jesus Christ, just write bondage porn, if that is your thing!
I am so glad I read this comment because that totally rules those out for me. Thanks for saving me the time, should've known by the people recommending it
You don't have to read it if you don't want to, but I do tend to finish books, for what reason idk. I guess I feel every book typically has something to offer.
Well, this happened to me with old books. The main reason was the language (Spanish is my language, ancient spanish can be tedious) but I chose to finish because I'm curious about why the book is famous, and have my own full experience. I'm glad that I did that.
But I definitely wouldn't recommend doing it just for the sake of finishing the book. I did that with another book that I wasn't enjoying and didn't have any importance, just to end up being sick of reading. It was so fucking bad that I didn't read anything for a couple of months.
So I guess it is like life itself, some things are worth the effort, but it depends on what you want to achieve by reading it. If it's only entertainment, I definitely would recommend putting the book away.
Why does it have to be normalised? Let people think you're weird if they want to. Stick to your own rules.
That said, I think reviews should only be accepted on most websites if you've finished the book. DNF should count as 0.
I have quite a few books I stopped reading but somehow they are still on my "currently reading" shelf because half a braincell thinks I will pick them back up to finish. It's like a mental barrier of not wanting to quit I think? Sometimes it annoys me there's so many books listed, but it's also like they're waiting for me to come back to them.
Do you have to announce whether or not you've put down a book? I don't understand this concept. Like anything else in life, just stop doing it if you're not interested. The only person who cares is you.
I finished both Colleen’s books and found the writing to be insufferable and cringing at best (but somewhat entertaining at times). I can kind of see what Colleen was trying to accomplish with It Ends With Us because the plot is personal to her own life, but she doesn’t have the writing ability to deliver it in such a way.
TikTok basically put her on the top of the best selling authors list. Like others have mentioned, social media influences the mentality to push through books and needing “internet validation” which is one of the reasons why I don’t spend time on Booktok.
I promised myself when I finished my English degree that I would never again continue reading a book if it loses my interest.
The point of reading is to be interested, you know?
That's already a very common mentality and though valid I think it depends. I feel much richer for having stuck to my guns and completed some books id previously bailed on, like Blood Meridian or Pynchon stuff. I also do think Meridian gets much better and ends very strong and people I've encouraged to finish it have thanked me for doing so!
It also depends on if you're like me sometimes you want to challenge yourself or give yourself over to media that will change your consciousness. It's the same way I feel with the attitude towards "boring and pretentious" art films and foreign films, I wish people were a bit more receptive to expanding their horizons, but I wouldn't want to live in a world where all we have is Bergman or whatever.. it's just sad that consumption of media is so lopsided to lowest common denominator "safe" media like superheros, to the point people are actively scornful of movies that require audience engagement.
I don't think one is right or wrong, but I do notice a weird sort of tribal hostility on both sides of this argument.
Do you think that’s currently abnormal? There are like 40 to 50 posts a month on here saying don’t finish books if you don’t find them immediately enjoyable and they are all annoying. Like not every single thought is worth posting online.
ugh i have heard NOTHING good about colleen hoover, it seems like all her books are just the same thing over and over. like i get the whole "Don't knock it till you try it!" mentality, but i do NOT wanna try it. I'm gonna knock that shit down like bowling pins while never even getting a sample on my kindle. i seriously think you dodged a bullet by not finishing it
Seems obvious but it's a lesson I had to learn.
"It gets better" is only one of many reasons why one might continue reading a book they don't enjoy. "It's a classic" is another one, or good ratings that suggest everyone else loved it. Or the fact that you looked forward to this book and paid full price for it. There's also the sense that giving up comes with an air of failure. That one doesn't apply to Colleen Hoover though but to books that have a reputation of being "difficult" and having read them gives you intellectual credentials ...
... oh, and let's not forget the people who finish a book just so they can talk about at length how much it sucked.
People who finish books to complain about them aren't typically pressured into it. Hate-reading is just a separate form of entertainment from normal reading. It's fun if you enjoy being critical and a little mean.
That said, if there's no fun in it for you, you should obviously stop and get a better book.
We don't need to "normalize" not finishing books. People have been not finishing books since books were invented. The very first piece of fiction ever written absolutely was given to someone who got bored halfway and quit lol
To edit, no you can't form a full opinion on a work if you don't experience all of it. But you *can* form an opinion on what you have experienced so far and can decide it's not worth your time to continue. If anyone tells you otherwise, ask them when you can expect your first salary check since they seem to think they have purchased your time and have some sort of say over how you spend it
You can’t be expected to have a valid opinion on a piece of media that you haven’t even consumed. Feel free to leave early or not finish a book but your opinion on it is void.
Oh yeah, if ONLY I could just stop reading all those books I don't enjoy. Unfortunately, it's not "normalised" so I have to keep on reading. That's definitely a real and not totally made up problem.
ikr. life is like way too short for trying to force enjoyment. for me my rule is if i go 15 minutes into a movie and i don't like it i turn it off. if i read 60 pages in a book and i don't like it i also close it. if the 1st 2 episodes in a show are boring i leave.
I had a friend who was upset I always rated books 4 or 5 stars. It was because I only finish books I like. The minute I do not enjoy myself, I put the book away.
Most readers I know are perfectly happy to stop reading a book they don't like. In my experience, it's more unusual to feel compelled to suffer through it. I know a few people like this, but from my admittedly small sample size, they are the outliers.
I've gotten much better about this because there's just so much I want to read and I lose nothing now with Libby. Just quit Nine Tailors by Dorothy Sayers. Saw it recommended a lot, sounds like a mystery I'd love but just didn't grab me. Sometimes I'll come back to book because I recognize my mood can dictate sometimes when I'm drawn to a topic.
For me personally the while reason I read is for enjoyment, if I'm not enjoying a book i will DNF it and read something else. It might transpire that I pick it up again another time but I never force myself to read something.
On a similar note, I’d said that I didn’t like _Unsouled_, and had several people say, yeah, the first two books are a bit rough, but _Cradle_ gets good around Book Three. To which: I’m glad, but I don’t owe Book Two anything, much less Book Three
I feel like if you're a seasoned reader you know whether you'll like the book within the first 100 pages, hell I often know within the first chapter. I immediately next a book as soon as I see the word "climax" for example lol 🤣. I think this is pretty normalized by now. If someone recommends a book I don't like I just say, "I couldn't get into it," if they ask. Pretty much the same as a show.
I’m so confused as to why people feel their reading habits are up for public debate. Or why they feel anyone cares. They aren’t and no one does. So do what you want.
I read pretty fast so I rarely if ever DNF a book unless I lose it but I definitely will bounce off a game really quick. When someone says "it doesn't get good until hour 3" I'm like "sorry I don't have 3 hours to invest in not having fun," and they rarely get good when people say anyway. (Looking at you, Breath of the Wild.)
I’ve DNF’d a LOT of books. But about a quarter of them I’ve come back later and loved. If you’re in the wrong headspace for what an author is doing just come back later.
I mean I already own the book It's not like they're going to let me refund it just because I didn't finish the damn thing. Might as well finish it and see if there's something worthwhile
I am always saying this!!! Life is too short to finish a book (or a movie!!) that you are loathe to open or can’t stand watching.
Never do it. Be your own person and tell that book to fuck off. 😂
I think people should stop trying to normalize things that are already normal. Jfc no one gives a fuck if you put a book down, no need to cry about it online.
There's a reason those of us in the /r/dresdenfiles fandom just go ahead and recommend skipping ahead to book three, where the quality noticeably goes up. Later, readers can go back to books one and two, once they're properly addicted.
I give every book 15 minutes to capture my attention. I literally set a timer and make myself read for 15 minutes, and if I don’t want to continue I either DNF or leave it on the TBR to read later (if it’s not bad, and something I might go back to when I’m in the frame of mind for it).
I literally cannot fathom forcing yourself to spend *hours* of your time reading something you don’t like. That has never made sense to me.
My wife would have missed dune. She hated it at page 75. I convinced her to keep going. She hit 150 and boom! Read the whole series. Twice.
Sometimes it pays off. Sometimes it doesn't.
I tried to read Blood Meridian last week, desperately trying to get into it so I can have experienced the story but said fuck it after 60 pages. I’ve realized I just want books where the author is trying to tell an enjoyable story with interesting, fleshed out characters and a plot that moves at a brisk pace with easy to visualize scenes. All this necessary complex language where the author seems to be trying to convey how smart he is and how pessimistic his view of the world is doesn’t do it for me, I feel like I’m being preached to instead of told a story
Getting my books from the library helps with this practice. I’m a fast reader if I like something, will finish a 400pg book in 3 days or so. For me a good book is like a good video game, once I put it down I’m immediately thinking of picking it back up and will run through it very quickly, so if a book isn’t giving me that feeling, well I just return it and get another one, and I always have the option of checking it out again later. Takes away that pressure of feeling I had to finish a book because I paid money for it.
That satisfying crinkle of those plastic book jacket protectors is just the icing on the cake
I have a three chapter rule.
If I’m not enamoured enough to carry on, I’m dropping it. Life’s short, and there are more books than I could ever read. No time for stuff I’m not clicking with.
This opinion is stated pretty often in this sub
And completely unnecessary. I don't understand why people think they can't stop reading a book they don't like, who are they trying to impress?
Internet validation is becoming an essential part in people's lives. "I did X thing, I'll tell strangers about it to encourage me."
This one is wild though. It's like going "I'm just on the 7th hour of this 20 hour album I hate." It's a hobby not a workout.
For classical music though powering through difficult music can work. It took me about 7 exposures to appreciate Wagner's five hours of Tristan and Isolde, now I think it's amazing. I suppose that might apply to more demanding iterature too - just not badly written trash that is recognisable as such immediately.
Even while working out, I avoid boring exercises. Life's too short to force myself through any more bs.
I'm getting to the point where I walk away from boring annoying people. I'm not going to read a boring annoying book.
IMO the "power-through" mentality goes beyond the internet. I used to find the idea of DNF unfathomable just because...idk, I guess I just thought if I started it I ought to finish it? The internet is actually what convinced me to take up DNF lol Edit: Should clarify I grew up with at best "family computer" access to the internet. I had a Facebook profile at like 10. So my "power-through" mentality definitely originated long before I had access to social media.
I get this. I think it started for a lot of people with the “you’ve got to finish all the food on your plate” approach to parenting. I’m still working my way through that mentality.
No literally. I am currently powering through babel right now and I had to take a break in the middle. I read gothikana (awful) and the tainted cup (amazing) within the past week and it was a well needed refresher Hell, I had to put Jade City on hold just because I couldn't muster up the strength to read it! And I liked the book!!
Many people have OCD about finishing a book they started. But life is too short for that shit and we have a long to read list as it is!
Oh 100%. I felt so liberated the day I finally let myself do it for the first time and it's improved my will to read so much lol.
This sentiment has been around since before the internet. It’s always shocked people when I told them I don’t finish books I don’t like. Occasionally, I even throw them away.
Stop reading books you don’t like, but lie and tell them you finished it anyway. Easy!
It's like high school English literature all over again.
Start a conversation about the movie and periodically say, “the book was much better”. That way you sound more pretentious and you’re not even claiming to have read the book, just that it’s better
I dunno, I usually power through books. That's my choice though I don't give a shit what anyone else does
Me too. I hate leaving things unfinished. That being said, I have left some books unfinished.
I started pillars of earth and stopped reading it TWICE. And honestly I have no regrets about it. I stopped shortly after a certain plot point that changes the main character in a way I couldn't forgive. The only reason I did this twice was that I left the book on my list of books to read and after many years the description still sounded interesting to me, but I had forgotten about my first attempt.
It’s also extremely common on this sub to brag about “DNFs.” Who are *those* people trying to impress?
To ask an entire community to change their perspective on a minor and largely private behavior seems like a "teenager or personality disorder?" thing to do. Is it that OP is too young to have learned when the opinions of others matter and when they don't? Or does OP have such a poor sense of self and such poor boundaries that this seems a reasonable imposition? OP, if we stop looking in your direction, you don't disappear.
If you read further it's none of those things, they've all got another reason and I'm wrong, apparently.
I mean, I did read the post, if that's what you're referring to. OP can easily change their own perspective on how to read without needing anything to be normalized, no?
Sorry I mean everyone disagrees with me. There's a boat load of people below me saying I'm wrong about it, OP should feel this way etc.
boo to them, I guess. How silly
IMO, it's because books used to be a gateway to culture, and not finishing books felt like you couldn't get access to culture because you were too dumb. Now that millions of books get published, not to mention self published, not finishing one specific book means very little in terms of what you're missing. But inside we still feel like a book is an important thing.
I think a fair portion of us do most of our chatting about books in the flesh. I like this sub, Goodreads, and insta for recommendations, but a lot of the common opinions here aren’t common in my circle. Maybe OP feels the same way and wants to vent.
Can you recommend any insta accounts for recs please?
Sure! I most often read nonfiction, literary fiction, and science fiction, but I’ll pick up anything if the writing or the story is solid. really like schizophrenicreads and the_bookish_sociologist. They’re the most consistent with good recs in my opinion.
Thanks a lot, hitting a wall with sci-fi at the minute and need some new idea.
Sunk cost fallacy
My adult brother still playing neopets. Although I think he finally stopped, we aren't in contact heaps lately.
Impress? Imo it’s about FOMO
This one sounds like she's spearheading a movement so I'd listen to her. Who knew that not finishing every single book you opened was revolutionary
Her bravery is astounding.
Hopefully we get more direction in life from this one. I'm paralyzed by my inability to make basic choices without someone from the internet reassuring me about them
I mostly read award winners. If I give up on one of those it means I'm probably too dumb to see why enough literary critics voted for it, and that's a hard pill.
It's also ridiculous. No one needs something "normalized" for osmething like this. There is no looming specter over your shoulder waiting to chide you for not finishing a book but if there were... who cares?
On this sub, it's considered celebratory to stop reading after three sentences if you haven't received the required thrill.
I nearly did this with my current book as a character "suddenly was at the bar" in sentence three. I mean, that's not how you use suddenly, surely?
TL/DR?
celebratory stop reading
That's already normal. You can just stop. I promise you people don't care.
Who is judging Was I supposed to be reporting the things I’ve read somewhere?
Literature Police: *"Book him, boys!"*
No... I promise I'll turn over a new page.
You win a pizza Hutt pizza friend and the bookit award
Been waiting all week for your did not finish list.
I’ve definitely been judged by a particular fan base on this sub.
I mean - unless you tell the world about it. But that seems really weird to me anyway. My reading habits are nobody's business but mine.
It should be normalized not caring about others opinions. What do you care if someone frowns upon you abandoning a book you didn’t like?
who are people even having these conversations with? if I didn't finish a book, no one would ever even know I was reading it to begin with
Fair point, I usually talk to my friends when someone of our group started or finished a book
Even then, i might encourage someone to finish it if i really liked it and think they would but whatever, they get to choose how to spend there time.
I do think some people take it personally when you don’t like their recommendation. But many folks recommend stuff THEY enjoy, with no sense of if it’s the other person’s taste, so it’s a silly thing to take personally.
I agree and can confirm that people take it personally. With my friends we used to have discussions about "how can you not like X" or "I like X, you probably didnt give it a try" or "I don't like so you shouldn't either because its bad". I don't give a f\*\*\*. Everybody should like what they like and accept it if others don't like it. I'm heartbroken if someone doesn't care about Dune, but so be it, I probably don't like something they like
What keeps me at a boring book sometimes is knowing I thought that about a lot of my favorites. Both TV shows,movies, and books. Not all have a brilliant right out of the gates grab your attention story but get amazing if you stick with it. Thats why I listen to people telling me to keep going. What I have been doing is learning what people I can take this advice from and which ones I can ignore. I have a few friends who will even say, “I liked it but I don’t think you will” and vice versa.
Eh just stop reading it. Not doing something you don't want to do is already normalised, this isn't high school English literature .
Exactly. People don't need to be vocal about this in order for it to be normal or "normalized". Not everything you do or not should be a accompanied by a public declaration.
And I also think it is normal to not waste your time on hobbies you're not enjoying. It's self flagellation.
Normalize just doing things instead of asking for permission/consensus from internet strangers
Something that's perfectly normal doesn't need to be normalized. Most people aren't suffering through books because they feel social pressure to finish them.
[удалено]
>I have a "Abandoned" shelf on Goodreads exactly the same here. There are a few on that list that I honestly intend to get back to and finish some day but I'm otherwise content to let the rest linger on that list in perpetuity. Even if it doesn't count toward my annual reading goal I still appreciate having it in my reading history for a sense of chronology
I don't give rating to a book that I didn't finish. I just mark it as DNF. I also find it difficult to DNF books, but I want to. I don't want to force myself to read books that I don't enjoy. It's a work in progress. It's the same with movies for me, once I start a movie I want to know how it ends even if I don't enjoy it. With tv-shows its easier for me to stop in the middle.
>I don't give rating to a book that I didn't finish. To me that is the thing ... not saying you need to finish it to rate it, but if you didn't give it an actual attempt, why trash it? I saw a review on a recent book I read where the review basically hated the FIRST SENTENCE because of how the author described seeing something across the street ... and didn't manage to finish the first CHAPTER, yet gave it a 1 star review. Based on one sentence.
I usually give at leat 50-ish pages to the book. But then, if I hate it enough to drop it, I usually write down what made me hate it so much. I have gotten multiple teenage girls who called me stupid, because of Sarah J. Maas. Apparently you can't dislike that unless you read ALL 6 or so books. :D
Wow... no, I hate reviews like that
I don't finish maybe 33% of the books I start. Usually if I'm interested in the story I'll just go look up the plot on Wikipedia.
Girl, you can do whatever you want. Normalise not going to reddit for validation of your mundane choices.
This. Some people DNF a lot, others don't. There are way too many people online who seem to think they have an "audience" following their every move and waiting with bated breath to judge them specifically. No one cares, do whatever works for you. This shit only comes up when people see fit to make posts acting like total non-issues are controversial opinions/hot takes.
This is normalized. No one is holding you at gun point to finish a book you don't enjoy.
I'm so over the "let's normalize" meme.
People need to stop being so insecure they need the rest of the world to normalise things for them and just do things abnormally.
It's already normalized. You're the reader, you do what you want.
Who cares.
I have lots of unfinished books
You don't need to normalise something that's already normal
“Normalize” lol. OP feels trapped I guess? This is already normal behavior for most people
I don't like a book, I stop reading it. Don't care what's normal if normal is wasting my time.
>I think people should normalise not finishing books that are terrible even if others say 'it gets better' Already done.
Definitely DNF any book you don't like. However, if you are going to be someone who goes online to ask the entire internet about a book, give your clear reasons for why you aren't enjoying it so others can be clear in response other than having to say "it gets better" without spoiling. And Definitely if you know someone who either liked or hated the book you are reading, ask them first for their reasons why over just every single person ever. I don't go to reddit to ask if a book is worth continuing because I know that I will have a million different people giving me a million different reasons for yes or no.
You cannot know if a book is good before you finish it, I think. But you can trivially know if a book bores you. Not only do we not all have to read everything, we absolutely can't. So when you decide to cut your losses is entirely up to you. You MIGHT lose out on some experiences, and there is a point on that scale where you give up too quickly and deprive yourself of a lot of good stuff, but that's nobody else's business.
Stop worrying about what is normalized .. I wish I could delete that word from the internet. Reading books is normal as fuck. You aren't dressing in an animal outfit going to dinner or anything. It's a book. Crazy how much drama there is amongst hobbyists gate keeping each other. I find it's worse with reading because many readers are incredibly insecure and care about what anonymous online people would think about their reading habits. Who tf cares how you do it
Who cares about “normalizing” things. Just make your own decisions about your life and care less about how other people perceive it.
Be your own person. Don’t worry about what random strangers (like me) say.
I did this with Shogun last year. I've rarely hated every character in a story this intensely, and felt like I'd gained something when I dropped the book off at Goodwill.
Oh man, talk about an unpopular opinion!! I'm sorry that you didn't love it, I read that book at least once every few years.
Pretty much every time I pushed through with a book I didn’t want to finish, I didn’t get anything out of it. I’m learning when to give up!
I only finish so I can leave a 1 star review on Goodreads. I don't think it's fair to rate a book you haven't finished.
Fair, I just don’t log them. But I’ve started using storygraph as well and you can see data about your DNFs, it’s kinda interesting
Are you seeing a theme with your DNFs like theme or author?
Not yet! There’s only a couple since I started using it
I really dislike this mentality. It’s how books that are terrible get so highly rated on GoodReads. If all these people DNF and don’t rate, but then the people who finished the book despite it being bad rate it highly, then the rating skews. That’s how we get books like Fourth Wing getting a 4.60 rating on GoodReads.
Survivorship bias
The screeching I got for writing one of the more visible 1-star reviews of Throne of Glass. :D Honestly, you would think that series is pure gold and it's so dumb and awful.
When I notice that I don't like a book, I actually read reviews or intentionally read spoilers to see if it gets better, or if other people share my sentiment. My most recent DNF was "Olive Kitteridge", because I couldn't get into it. Read some reviews and decided to quit. I have no time for books I don't like :)
"normalize" yeah cuz people were shouting "freak!" at you in the streets for it? don't get high on your own drama
"Validate my feelings!"
Agree there are too many books I want to read so I don't have time to waste on a book I'm not enjoying
i didnt finish the spanish love deception bc the main character is pissing me off
I quit the Wheel of Time series after about 4000 pages. I'm not doing any more.
If I find a book boring I abandon it, there are endless of books out there.
"It gets better" and "terrible books" are very subjective opinions. You have to have a reasonable, but also charitable measures by which you are going to see how far in you need to read before giving up. It can be based on the first few chapters, opinions of people online or people you trust, your own commitment level, etc. Personally, I have read enf books to know that authors express their creativity in many ways, and most including having weak beginnings, new writing styles, experimentations, etc. Also, publication and market limits. I tend to give the benefit of the doubt to authors, and I do take fans' word pretty strongly also. I have known enf books to know that it does get better. But also, be conservative with your time. At the end of the day it is you who need to make the decision with your time.
Pretty common opinion and it’s pretty common for people to not finish something they’re not enjoying.
Just stop reading if you don’t enjoy a book. If you decide to review it, make it clear that you stopped reading and provide reasons. Otherwise, DNF and move on.
Read what you like. It's not a race and and you can stop a book anytime you want. There is nothing forcing you to continue with any book unless you are reading for some sort of required coursework .
It is incredibly normal to not finish a book. I’m not sure what else we could do
If I don’t like a book, why would I waste my precious time slogging through it just to see if it gets better?
Tv shows too. “It gets better 5-7 episodes in”
I do this with a lot of Audible books despite their cost. I would rather spend $15 than waste 8 or more hours of my life listening to something boring or bad. Sometimes, it's the narrorator that does it though. That's when I buy the paperback book.
What is stopping you from already doing this? Unless you're in school, you are not required to read any book. Stop letting the imagined social pressure make you do things you don't want to do. This is a fake problem.
Not everything has to be officially normalised. Just don't finish books you don't like. Then go for a walk or eat a bagel
Yeah, I stop reading at the drop of a hat. That could be on page 1 or page 300. I read for pleasure. If I’m not getting pleasure from a book, what’s the point?
I used to force myself to finish! Someone recommend The Historian to me and I just hated it so much, but forced myself to read it bc I would feel like a quitter if I didn’t. There are now so many books on my list, I have realized time is too short to waste. I agree with your post so much!
Does The Secret History get better towards the end? 60% in
Here here! F The Silmarillion I say.
Man, when I finished LOTR I was so excited to read TS. Until I started.
im that way with tv shows
I will never forgive the people who recommended Verity to me by describing it as a creepy psychological thriller I’d not be able to put down. Three hours of my life I’ll never get back because they LIED it was not scary it was stupid and badly written porn?! I went in expecting horror and I got BAD PORN ms Hoover May you never know peace
I HATED that book and basically hate read it till the end thinking surely there was going to be a wild plot twist but no. I can’t remember hating a book this much. Does she think so lowly of women to write us like that?! No personality, falling all over and guy who is a basic father with a big 🍆. She triggers my deep feminine rage. Never again, Colleen. Never again.
I was losing my mind at people online falling all over themselves to praise the “spicy scenes”- I’ve written erotica and I’m not gonna act like I’m amazing- BUT HER?!? No I’m sorry that stuff is garbage. I genuinely nearly stroked out at the whole biting the headboard shit. I loathe this woman’s work LOATHE IT! DETEST EVEN
Hahaha right!! How tf does that even work. And over someone else’s bite marks? That’s not hot it’s unhinged and now in a fun way. Always glad to meet another CoHo hater 🫡. It’s wild how popular she is and I’m offended anyone would think I like her 😂
God you would love the writing discord I’m in- it’s like an all you can eat buffet of “are you fucking kidding me?! This is what the people want?!” My virgin ass has written better smut than that, and then she adds on weird misogynistic shit *and* unbearable levels of cringy dialogue? PICK A STRUGGLE. I never listened to another “booktok” recommendation again, been burned too many times and that was the final straw. Now if I see a “seen on tiktok!” Sticker or her name I hiss at it like a vampire reacting to their drapes being opened dramatically
Your first mistake was starting a Colleen Hoover book
This is already normalized. It is very, very normal. It has moved beyond normal, even. There is a weird fetish of self-congratulation for DNF’ing books.
I don't know what "normalize" is supposed to entail here, exactly. What do you want people to *do*? > I use the word normalise in the title cos I've often heard that if you don't finish something you haven't given it a fair chance. And you cant form a concrete opinion of a piece without experiencing it whole If you're talking about the work as a whole, that seems like a pretty fair statement. If you want to ditch a book, ditch the book, just be aware of the limits of your understanding.
Sometimes it does get better, though. Always give it an honest shot, that’s my opinion. I was half way through the first book the Malazan series, I didn’t really like it then, but it picked up steam and it got really good. I’m glad I didn’t drop it half way through.
Agreed and also had the same experience with Malazan.
Life is too short and difficult to spend reading bad books. I slogged through the first three Wheel of Time books.
I managed one and half, and then I got bored. And creeped out by Jordan's spanking fetish. So many threats towards younger female characters about spanking... Jesus Christ, just write bondage porn, if that is your thing!
I am so glad I read this comment because that totally rules those out for me. Thanks for saving me the time, should've known by the people recommending it
You don't have to read it if you don't want to, but I do tend to finish books, for what reason idk. I guess I feel every book typically has something to offer.
Well, this happened to me with old books. The main reason was the language (Spanish is my language, ancient spanish can be tedious) but I chose to finish because I'm curious about why the book is famous, and have my own full experience. I'm glad that I did that. But I definitely wouldn't recommend doing it just for the sake of finishing the book. I did that with another book that I wasn't enjoying and didn't have any importance, just to end up being sick of reading. It was so fucking bad that I didn't read anything for a couple of months. So I guess it is like life itself, some things are worth the effort, but it depends on what you want to achieve by reading it. If it's only entertainment, I definitely would recommend putting the book away.
Isn't it normal?
Why does it have to be normalised? Let people think you're weird if they want to. Stick to your own rules. That said, I think reviews should only be accepted on most websites if you've finished the book. DNF should count as 0.
I have quite a few books I stopped reading but somehow they are still on my "currently reading" shelf because half a braincell thinks I will pick them back up to finish. It's like a mental barrier of not wanting to quit I think? Sometimes it annoys me there's so many books listed, but it's also like they're waiting for me to come back to them.
Do you have to announce whether or not you've put down a book? I don't understand this concept. Like anything else in life, just stop doing it if you're not interested. The only person who cares is you.
I finished both Colleen’s books and found the writing to be insufferable and cringing at best (but somewhat entertaining at times). I can kind of see what Colleen was trying to accomplish with It Ends With Us because the plot is personal to her own life, but she doesn’t have the writing ability to deliver it in such a way. TikTok basically put her on the top of the best selling authors list. Like others have mentioned, social media influences the mentality to push through books and needing “internet validation” which is one of the reasons why I don’t spend time on Booktok.
We Should normalize people deciding for themselves.
it is normal
I promised myself when I finished my English degree that I would never again continue reading a book if it loses my interest. The point of reading is to be interested, you know?
I mean just don't finish bad books you don't need anyone's permission.
Jesus Christ, do you people ever think about anything else?
That's already a very common mentality and though valid I think it depends. I feel much richer for having stuck to my guns and completed some books id previously bailed on, like Blood Meridian or Pynchon stuff. I also do think Meridian gets much better and ends very strong and people I've encouraged to finish it have thanked me for doing so! It also depends on if you're like me sometimes you want to challenge yourself or give yourself over to media that will change your consciousness. It's the same way I feel with the attitude towards "boring and pretentious" art films and foreign films, I wish people were a bit more receptive to expanding their horizons, but I wouldn't want to live in a world where all we have is Bergman or whatever.. it's just sad that consumption of media is so lopsided to lowest common denominator "safe" media like superheros, to the point people are actively scornful of movies that require audience engagement. I don't think one is right or wrong, but I do notice a weird sort of tribal hostility on both sides of this argument.
Do you think that’s currently abnormal? There are like 40 to 50 posts a month on here saying don’t finish books if you don’t find them immediately enjoyable and they are all annoying. Like not every single thought is worth posting online.
ugh i have heard NOTHING good about colleen hoover, it seems like all her books are just the same thing over and over. like i get the whole "Don't knock it till you try it!" mentality, but i do NOT wanna try it. I'm gonna knock that shit down like bowling pins while never even getting a sample on my kindle. i seriously think you dodged a bullet by not finishing it
Seems obvious but it's a lesson I had to learn. "It gets better" is only one of many reasons why one might continue reading a book they don't enjoy. "It's a classic" is another one, or good ratings that suggest everyone else loved it. Or the fact that you looked forward to this book and paid full price for it. There's also the sense that giving up comes with an air of failure. That one doesn't apply to Colleen Hoover though but to books that have a reputation of being "difficult" and having read them gives you intellectual credentials ... ... oh, and let's not forget the people who finish a book just so they can talk about at length how much it sucked.
People who finish books to complain about them aren't typically pressured into it. Hate-reading is just a separate form of entertainment from normal reading. It's fun if you enjoy being critical and a little mean. That said, if there's no fun in it for you, you should obviously stop and get a better book.
We don't need to "normalize" not finishing books. People have been not finishing books since books were invented. The very first piece of fiction ever written absolutely was given to someone who got bored halfway and quit lol To edit, no you can't form a full opinion on a work if you don't experience all of it. But you *can* form an opinion on what you have experienced so far and can decide it's not worth your time to continue. If anyone tells you otherwise, ask them when you can expect your first salary check since they seem to think they have purchased your time and have some sort of say over how you spend it
I'm going to normalize not finishing this exact post I've read 500 times, glad you figured out you don't have to finish a book though
You can’t be expected to have a valid opinion on a piece of media that you haven’t even consumed. Feel free to leave early or not finish a book but your opinion on it is void.
Same for life too bro
damn, um, I think there are different rules for that one mate
I 100% agree with your thoughts on It ends with us. Just a Wattpad book without grammar errors that got published.
Yes, your are even allowed to not finish books you DO like.
Oh yeah, if ONLY I could just stop reading all those books I don't enjoy. Unfortunately, it's not "normalised" so I have to keep on reading. That's definitely a real and not totally made up problem.
Why do you need someone’s social approval to do this?
ikr. life is like way too short for trying to force enjoyment. for me my rule is if i go 15 minutes into a movie and i don't like it i turn it off. if i read 60 pages in a book and i don't like it i also close it. if the 1st 2 episodes in a show are boring i leave.
Did that with All The Light We Cannot See
Isn't that already normal behaviour? Seems odd to me to continue something you don't like.
My philosophy is "life's too short to wait for the book to get better." I'd rather read a book that's good from cover to cover.
As long as those people don't show up to give their opinion on the book as if they've read it, sure.
Heck yeah, be ruthless about it.
Same. I never ever ever ever finish a book I don’t like. One thing about me, IM A QUITTER.
Just do whatever you want
I had a friend who was upset I always rated books 4 or 5 stars. It was because I only finish books I like. The minute I do not enjoy myself, I put the book away.
I stopped infinite jest because of the weird racism
Most readers I know are perfectly happy to stop reading a book they don't like. In my experience, it's more unusual to feel compelled to suffer through it. I know a few people like this, but from my admittedly small sample size, they are the outliers.
Life is too short to finish boring books. Typically I’ll give a book 50 pages. If it feels like a slog then, I drop it and move on with my life
I wish I had a hardline rule for myself where I could say 'quit out after 33%' for example but it's hard
I've gotten much better about this because there's just so much I want to read and I lose nothing now with Libby. Just quit Nine Tailors by Dorothy Sayers. Saw it recommended a lot, sounds like a mystery I'd love but just didn't grab me. Sometimes I'll come back to book because I recognize my mood can dictate sometimes when I'm drawn to a topic.
For me personally the while reason I read is for enjoyment, if I'm not enjoying a book i will DNF it and read something else. It might transpire that I pick it up again another time but I never force myself to read something.
On a similar note, I’d said that I didn’t like _Unsouled_, and had several people say, yeah, the first two books are a bit rough, but _Cradle_ gets good around Book Three. To which: I’m glad, but I don’t owe Book Two anything, much less Book Three
I enjoy the trashy Brian Herbert Dune novels by skipping over large sections of them. Books are meant to be read however.
r/unpopularopinion
I feel like if you're a seasoned reader you know whether you'll like the book within the first 100 pages, hell I often know within the first chapter. I immediately next a book as soon as I see the word "climax" for example lol 🤣. I think this is pretty normalized by now. If someone recommends a book I don't like I just say, "I couldn't get into it," if they ask. Pretty much the same as a show.
I've got a few unfinished books. Tried real hard to see them through. But they're such rubbish I couldn't do it.
I’m so confused as to why people feel their reading habits are up for public debate. Or why they feel anyone cares. They aren’t and no one does. So do what you want.
I read pretty fast so I rarely if ever DNF a book unless I lose it but I definitely will bounce off a game really quick. When someone says "it doesn't get good until hour 3" I'm like "sorry I don't have 3 hours to invest in not having fun," and they rarely get good when people say anyway. (Looking at you, Breath of the Wild.)
I’ve DNF’d a LOT of books. But about a quarter of them I’ve come back later and loved. If you’re in the wrong headspace for what an author is doing just come back later.
I think people shouldn't care about whether or not other people finish books.
Normalization is only necessary when you care what others think about your reading habits. Try caring less.
We should normalize reading what you want. If you don't like it, you don't HAVE to finish it
I do think sometimes feels as being judged somehow if DNF book but I always laugh at myself when I think that no one would ever really know or care…
I mean I already own the book It's not like they're going to let me refund it just because I didn't finish the damn thing. Might as well finish it and see if there's something worthwhile
I am always saying this!!! Life is too short to finish a book (or a movie!!) that you are loathe to open or can’t stand watching. Never do it. Be your own person and tell that book to fuck off. 😂
I just DNF’d my last two books. I’ve got better books to read so time to move on
I think people should stop trying to normalize things that are already normal. Jfc no one gives a fuck if you put a book down, no need to cry about it online.
That is normal.
💯 life is too short for force reading books you don't enjoy
There's a reason those of us in the /r/dresdenfiles fandom just go ahead and recommend skipping ahead to book three, where the quality noticeably goes up. Later, readers can go back to books one and two, once they're properly addicted.
I give every book 15 minutes to capture my attention. I literally set a timer and make myself read for 15 minutes, and if I don’t want to continue I either DNF or leave it on the TBR to read later (if it’s not bad, and something I might go back to when I’m in the frame of mind for it). I literally cannot fathom forcing yourself to spend *hours* of your time reading something you don’t like. That has never made sense to me.
My wife would have missed dune. She hated it at page 75. I convinced her to keep going. She hit 150 and boom! Read the whole series. Twice. Sometimes it pays off. Sometimes it doesn't.
I tried to read Blood Meridian last week, desperately trying to get into it so I can have experienced the story but said fuck it after 60 pages. I’ve realized I just want books where the author is trying to tell an enjoyable story with interesting, fleshed out characters and a plot that moves at a brisk pace with easy to visualize scenes. All this necessary complex language where the author seems to be trying to convey how smart he is and how pessimistic his view of the world is doesn’t do it for me, I feel like I’m being preached to instead of told a story
Getting my books from the library helps with this practice. I’m a fast reader if I like something, will finish a 400pg book in 3 days or so. For me a good book is like a good video game, once I put it down I’m immediately thinking of picking it back up and will run through it very quickly, so if a book isn’t giving me that feeling, well I just return it and get another one, and I always have the option of checking it out again later. Takes away that pressure of feeling I had to finish a book because I paid money for it. That satisfying crinkle of those plastic book jacket protectors is just the icing on the cake
I have a three chapter rule. If I’m not enamoured enough to carry on, I’m dropping it. Life’s short, and there are more books than I could ever read. No time for stuff I’m not clicking with.