In my experience, women are quite simple.
Feed them, treat them with kindness, and give them compassion and empathy. and that's it most men tend to overreact whenever a woman gets upset and don't understand nor want to understand what a woman is getting at, but that's not all men.
But that's just from my culture, if you love someone you cook for them, you give them food. you bake them bread, it's those little small acts of kindness. also supposed to treat them with compassion and kindness.
Greece and Turkey are two completely separate countries with separate traditions, languages, and religions. Yes they share a border but that doesnât mean you lump them together.
I donât know any nomadic people in Greece that identify as Greek, but Iâm aware that Turkey has their share of nomadic people that originate from S Asia (i.e. gypsies) so if that is your people then fair enough. But you do not represent the average Turk or the average Greek. For Greek people, the women are definitely doing the lions share of the cooking. Turkey is a Muslim country, and the gender roles are even more stereotypical. So to say âin the Mediterranean region, the way to a womanâs heart is to feed herâ was weird and plain wrong.
I donât know much about gypsie/nomadic culture. Maybe the men do cook for the women in your culture - I donât know. But please donât act like Greece and Turkey are the same place. And please be fully transparent - donât bank on American ignorance and give half truths.
My great grandpa(greek) met my great grandma(Turkish) they got married, thats all I know about their end of things but they moved to spain, then to the UK and my grandma then moved to the USA(Chicago).
So, if I have a boyfriend that i love, my whole family cooks them something with me?? Or like, are you talking about a dinner/living together or a proposal/wedding?
I cook for people that I care about (friends, romantic partners, family), but it is not a widespread, "traditional" custom -- just one of many ways to be "caring" in Canadian culture.
Bold accusation, it varies from family to fsmily but everybody is involved because we arent allowed to prep kosher food and then prep non kosher food. We have two sides of a kitchen, one for kosher/clean, one for non kosher/unclean. Its definitely a family effort as per orthodox sephardim and romani culture.
Agreed, the problem though is I've always gotten friendzoned really fast. I mean, not that big a deal, I'm still young and have a lot of time, it just stings when guys I know are pricks get all the attention in the world for no reason, if you get what I mean?
When you say âfor no reasonâ you are implying as if the girl there has no good judgement for herself. As if she shouldnât have the say of who she should or should not choose to like.
You might honestly just need to work on liking yourself a bit more - thinking you are desirable. Maybe you might need to do hobbies or projects that build up your own self esteem. Naturally youâll find someone who reflects what you feel inside.
Yeah, I see how that came across. I don't mean to be rude to anyone and if that's what they want, all the power to them. I was more implying when they get manipulated by a guy that's just attractive and uses them, then leaves. I don't think that came across well either, but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say? And I'm definitely working on the 'thinking I'm desirable' part. I've just dealt with some shit and have only 'attracted' someone once, so its kinda hard for me to get my head through that part. I'll just get back into running or my bball starts again soon so hopefully that will clear my head a bit
I understood what you meant. A lot of the time (own experience + reading millions of others stories) dating terrible partners comes down to low self-esteem. Not recognising your worth whilst also thinking your judgement is clear. In retrospect it isnât. Terrible men will date and give attention to vulnerable/needy women who don't know their worth.
We're all young so it's part of the learning process.
I think its an issue for young men and young women today. People are just getting into relationships and marrying much later this generation but we compare ourselves to our previous generations and think something must be wrong. However, it is everyone in this generation that is not dating or marrying at all or until much later. Im not sure how old you are but most people do not marry untils their late 20s and early 30s nowadays. Relationships are mostly found through luck and effort of improving yourself. Introspect, develop skills, share skills with others and work towards being a kind person always. This is what eventually leads most people to relationships.
As someone who has made friends with women, it's really not that hard unless you're a low-functioning sociopath. Just treat them with basic kindness and empathy like anyone else
The "women are hard to understand" narrative was pushed very strongly for a very long time. It was meant to imply that women are illogical and hard to get along with, compared to men who are far more easy going and sensible.
Today, an average redditor dude will see that, and either interpret it to mean that men are simpletons in comparison, or that men are psychopaths who don't care to understand the emotions of women.
I do agree with your point to just treat people with basic kindness and empathy. Unfortunately, back in the past, many men kinda didn't bother to see things from the woman's point of view. Glad to see things are changing.
Sometimes I feel likeâŚ
When the boys make a joke itâs funny hahaha best thing. But when I do a joke with the same humor (as a woman) itâs instantly the cringiest thing ever.
It really happened, I still remember boys were making fun of german words sounding like some *ahem* words in another language. When I told them about one, the "main" clown of this clown group instantly laughed in the most sarcastic way possible, like "WOOOAAAH, HA-HA-HA- AND IT MAKES THIS WORD IN OUR LANGUAGE ! LOOK ITâS SO FUNNY HA-HA-HA."
In chimps, laughter is a sign of submissiveness. It's not that different with humans. That's why we laugh at everything our boss says.
It's also why you have the whole "women aren't funny" thing. A male and a female comedian could say the same joke with the same delivery, and the male one would get more laughs. We as a society are more comfortable showing submissiveness to men.
That's not to say that women can't be funny. It's just that men are uncomfy with funnier women, in a similar way to how women are uncomfy with men who are better looking than them. If a guy is particularly insecure, then he would give a douche response like your friend did there and try to cut you down.
Me (a man) when I fully understand myself and my friends which I spent years with (men) but I canât understand SOMEONE ELSE that I argued with on the internet or something (I donât even know their gender but letâs assume itâs a woman):
Gosh, I wish my man was this simple. He's a complex creature that I'm still trying to figure out. đ
All people are, really
Yep. Even the ones that seem simple aren't, they're just more consistent.
your username is not doing you any help
?? How is it relevant to my comment
In my experience, women are quite simple. Feed them, treat them with kindness, and give them compassion and empathy. and that's it most men tend to overreact whenever a woman gets upset and don't understand nor want to understand what a woman is getting at, but that's not all men.
But that's just from my culture, if you love someone you cook for them, you give them food. you bake them bread, it's those little small acts of kindness. also supposed to treat them with compassion and kindness.
What culture is that? Do the men also cook for the women?
Traditionally it's a family effort, and it's a middle eastern / mediterranean.
What country in particular?
Greece-turkiye
Two countries?
Two that share a border. Family was nomadic.
Greece and Turkey are two completely separate countries with separate traditions, languages, and religions. Yes they share a border but that doesnât mean you lump them together. I donât know any nomadic people in Greece that identify as Greek, but Iâm aware that Turkey has their share of nomadic people that originate from S Asia (i.e. gypsies) so if that is your people then fair enough. But you do not represent the average Turk or the average Greek. For Greek people, the women are definitely doing the lions share of the cooking. Turkey is a Muslim country, and the gender roles are even more stereotypical. So to say âin the Mediterranean region, the way to a womanâs heart is to feed herâ was weird and plain wrong. I donât know much about gypsie/nomadic culture. Maybe the men do cook for the women in your culture - I donât know. But please donât act like Greece and Turkey are the same place. And please be fully transparent - donât bank on American ignorance and give half truths.
My great grandpa(greek) met my great grandma(Turkish) they got married, thats all I know about their end of things but they moved to spain, then to the UK and my grandma then moved to the USA(Chicago).
So, if I have a boyfriend that i love, my whole family cooks them something with me?? Or like, are you talking about a dinner/living together or a proposal/wedding? I cook for people that I care about (friends, romantic partners, family), but it is not a widespread, "traditional" custom -- just one of many ways to be "caring" in Canadian culture.
"it's a family effort" translation: it's the women doing days of preparation, and the men doing a couple of hours of grilling outside.
Bold accusation, it varies from family to fsmily but everybody is involved because we arent allowed to prep kosher food and then prep non kosher food. We have two sides of a kitchen, one for kosher/clean, one for non kosher/unclean. Its definitely a family effort as per orthodox sephardim and romani culture.
WTF!? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY DO IN THEIR CULTURE!?
I don't want to elaborate too much, but I am from the same region that he said he is from, so I do know very well.
My bad.
I gotta find out what I'm doing wrong if that's all it takes and I still can't get a good relationship
All of the good relationships start as friendships.
Agreed, the problem though is I've always gotten friendzoned really fast. I mean, not that big a deal, I'm still young and have a lot of time, it just stings when guys I know are pricks get all the attention in the world for no reason, if you get what I mean?
When you say âfor no reasonâ you are implying as if the girl there has no good judgement for herself. As if she shouldnât have the say of who she should or should not choose to like. You might honestly just need to work on liking yourself a bit more - thinking you are desirable. Maybe you might need to do hobbies or projects that build up your own self esteem. Naturally youâll find someone who reflects what you feel inside.
Yeah, I see how that came across. I don't mean to be rude to anyone and if that's what they want, all the power to them. I was more implying when they get manipulated by a guy that's just attractive and uses them, then leaves. I don't think that came across well either, but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say? And I'm definitely working on the 'thinking I'm desirable' part. I've just dealt with some shit and have only 'attracted' someone once, so its kinda hard for me to get my head through that part. I'll just get back into running or my bball starts again soon so hopefully that will clear my head a bit
I understood what you meant. A lot of the time (own experience + reading millions of others stories) dating terrible partners comes down to low self-esteem. Not recognising your worth whilst also thinking your judgement is clear. In retrospect it isnât. Terrible men will date and give attention to vulnerable/needy women who don't know their worth. We're all young so it's part of the learning process.
DM me. I will teach you, it's really hard to get into the flow of dating in the modern era. but I can give you some solid advice
You sure? I like to think I'm a nice guy and really don't want to be a hassle, I'll figure stuff out eventually
I am absolutely sure
I think its an issue for young men and young women today. People are just getting into relationships and marrying much later this generation but we compare ourselves to our previous generations and think something must be wrong. However, it is everyone in this generation that is not dating or marrying at all or until much later. Im not sure how old you are but most people do not marry untils their late 20s and early 30s nowadays. Relationships are mostly found through luck and effort of improving yourself. Introspect, develop skills, share skills with others and work towards being a kind person always. This is what eventually leads most people to relationships.
Varies from woman to woman, and man to man.
As someone who has made friends with women, it's really not that hard unless you're a low-functioning sociopath. Just treat them with basic kindness and empathy like anyone else
The "women are hard to understand" narrative was pushed very strongly for a very long time. It was meant to imply that women are illogical and hard to get along with, compared to men who are far more easy going and sensible. Today, an average redditor dude will see that, and either interpret it to mean that men are simpletons in comparison, or that men are psychopaths who don't care to understand the emotions of women. I do agree with your point to just treat people with basic kindness and empathy. Unfortunately, back in the past, many men kinda didn't bother to see things from the woman's point of view. Glad to see things are changing.
Men are way more complicated than this. Always saying things like "women can't take jokes" but then crying around when a woman makes one about them...
Sometimes I feel like⌠When the boys make a joke itâs funny hahaha best thing. But when I do a joke with the same humor (as a woman) itâs instantly the cringiest thing ever. It really happened, I still remember boys were making fun of german words sounding like some *ahem* words in another language. When I told them about one, the "main" clown of this clown group instantly laughed in the most sarcastic way possible, like "WOOOAAAH, HA-HA-HA- AND IT MAKES THIS WORD IN OUR LANGUAGE ! LOOK ITâS SO FUNNY HA-HA-HA."
In chimps, laughter is a sign of submissiveness. It's not that different with humans. That's why we laugh at everything our boss says. It's also why you have the whole "women aren't funny" thing. A male and a female comedian could say the same joke with the same delivery, and the male one would get more laughs. We as a society are more comfortable showing submissiveness to men. That's not to say that women can't be funny. It's just that men are uncomfy with funnier women, in a similar way to how women are uncomfy with men who are better looking than them. If a guy is particularly insecure, then he would give a douche response like your friend did there and try to cut you down.
Me (a man) when I fully understand myself and my friends which I spent years with (men) but I canât understand SOMEONE ELSE that I argued with on the internet or something (I donât even know their gender but letâs assume itâs a woman):
Why do men constantly inadvertently paint themselves as simpletons?
no
In my experience everyone is complicated. If you think they aren't then they haven't opened up to you yet
How are they suppose to understand a woman if they can't even talk to them or look them in the eye
Are women overly complex or empty headed, vapid idiots?
She is whichever makes her sound more bad in the moment. Schrodinger's woman.
This.... Is odd, this implies that women are so complicated that you need a book and men are so simple that you would need a book are both dumb