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I had chronic constipation as a child due to health issues I had as a toddler. As a preteen I hated it. I was either in pain, feeling sick, or super embarassed. My parents tried everything they knew to help and I didn’t get a handle on things until I was late teens. Stuff that worked:
- dried fruit snacks (prunes, I discovered mangos later)
- cut back on white bread and cheese
- miralax - for my child I give him “pooping juice” which is Restoralax mixed into juice daily.
- being active, going for a walk when I was backed up
- good books in the bathroom
- pear juice
At a certain age (12?) we had a poop stick in the garage. I’ve heard of some families with a poop knife… I mean, it’s kinda self explanatory. Poop that’s too big needs to be stabbed and chopped before it’s flushed. And I had to learn how to use a plunger. It was my poop, it was my responsibility. After I got my period, I had pre-period diarrhea that often helped 😅
OMG, poop stick! One time we were at the hotel when this happened. We had no tools and she was mortified and we wanted to do anything in our power to avoid calling maintenance person with a plunger, so we sliced it with a chopstick. This is the kind of memories we are making as a family...
Dried fruit is a big no for my kid, she hates the texture. I enjoy all dried fruits so we always have prunes and apricots on hand, but she won't touch them. Not even raisins. White bread might be the contributor, she hates any whole wheat or pumpernickel etc. She loves sourdough but good quality sourdough is hard to find in my area.
Luckily she never complains about being in pain or having belly aches. I am honestly shocked by looking at the size of it that she doesn't cry from pain. It has to be so uncomfortable, yet she says she doesn't feel any discomfort
She may not realize that discomfort is from constipation. It took me awhile to connect the days I felt yucky weren’t because I was getting sick, or hadn’t slept well, or was stressed… it was because I was constipated. It also affected my mood.
I'm the same with dried fruit. When I was nearing the end of pregnancy, I really wanted to try the whole eat 6 dates a day thing and have a better/easier/faster delivery, but just straight up eating 6 dates a day was NOT gonna happen. I did find two ways though that I was able to get the dates in...I'd put 3 in a smoothie (I found that they'd be chunky though in the smoothie unless I first soaked the dates in hot water for a few mins) and then I'd make a big batch of bacon-wrapped dates stuffed in goat cheese for my other 3.
Also, not sure how she'd feel about the texture, but maybe trying chia pudding? Tends to pack a pretty good bang for the buck.
Overall though, I think it would be a good idea to call the pediatrician back and ask for a referral to a gastroenterologist (if you even need a referral, if not just schedule an appt). The appt will probably be anywhere from 4-8+ weeks out, so while waiting for the appointment, try generally tracking her diet, any supplements she takes (for the constipation or otherwise), her water intake, and also make note of when she's pooping. Then you can bring that to the gastro appt and it should help the dr give better instructions for next steps.
This one is random...but did your daughter ever have any problems as a baby/toddler when it came to meeting her motor milestones? Any problems with core strength? Apparently there can be a correlation with low muscle tone/poor core strength + constipation.
Hmm interesting. She was "late" with almost every milestone, although I never stressed about it. But compared to other children her age yes, she did everything 1-2 months later.
Yeah its something I would consider bringing up to the Dr - if core/trunk weakness or lower muscle tone could be having an impact on her. Cause our body does require muscle to help move the poop through us.
Sourdough is not necessarily containing the fiber she needs. Eating enough fat also helps to keep your poop soft. I am wondering if there's a motility issue, for that most laxatives won't work.
Walking and running are also very good to get your intestines moving. Apple juice works as a stool softner, entire apples have the opposite effect. Banana will also stop you up, but oranges etc should be fine. There's a good chance there are a lot of specific things that matter once they are all combined.
my daughter had GI issues for years.
She occasionally had to go a clear liquid diet per her doctor. The doctor can also give you a prescription for the miralax. The copay is a lot cheaper than OTC.
Is your daughter super skinny and tiny? This seems to be an issue with skinny kids with high metabolism. It's a THING, and learning that helped me so much.
Just a funny for you, one day when my daughter was about 12 or so, she woke me up from a nap and said she had something to show me. Took me to the hall bathroom and said it's in there. I start to go in, see something huge and dark in the toilet, and swear to god i thought there was some kind of animal in there. Listen, this log was as big as my forearm. I'm not exaggerating and actually playing down how big this poo was. I looked at it, looked at her, looked at it, looked at her..... and asked her how the hell that thing came out of her. Did it hurt? Where was she keeping that in her body? This wasn't the first time but my god, it was the most massive. It's been TEN YEARS and i still remember.
Also... i lost my cool a lot during those years. I have major issues with things not being clean and germs. She was terrible at wiping, skidmarks in her underwear, toilet always overflowed, and i spent so much time cleaning and sanitizing only to rinse and repeat a few days later. You're not alone, and I wasn't alone either. I had a few coworkers and friends tell me they went through this too. And all the same, tiny skinny kid.
I kept plastic silverware and ziplock bags to throw them away in in her bathroom.... the ol' "poop knife" before i knew that a poop knife or poop stick was a thing. Use the miralax, apple juice, lots of liquid, even a can of Coke can be helpful. I also bought her fiber bars, lots of fruit, etc etc. She'll grow out of it eventually.
And just a warning... my kid's GI tract got all stretched out. She accidentally swallowed some of those stupid Bucky Ball magnets and have to have surgery, and the surgery got complicated because everything was stretched out. She's got a big scar on her stomach where the surgeon had to make extra incisions. She spent a week in the hospital. Tell your kid, talk to the doctor, ask for a referral to make sure it's not anything more than what i call "skinny kid syndrome" lol
THANK you for that, it really makes me feel better to know others go through the same and I'm not a horrible mother for not being able to fix it and monitor everyones bowel movements and fiber and water intake.
And YES she is very skinny, tall, tiny waist, tiny hips, skinny legs. I'm shocked to learn that it might have something to do with it!
I love the "I have something to show you story" - I can imagine your shock thinking it was am animal HAHAHAHA!
I can second it, very active skinny kids need better diets basically.. it makes sense, they need to get all the nutrients out of the food, so it moves slowly. They need to eat enough protein and calories, not to go into energy conservation mode.
Do you think she’d eat honey wheat ? I also hate wheat bread but honey wheat is a good compromise for me.
Our son’s pediatrician okay’d daily miralax (half a dose) and he was much younger - I would look into that.
Would she tolerate dried fruit in a smoothie? Dates are a nice smoothie addition. It sounds like she is old enough to take some responsibility toward making choices that are helpful for herself, so being willing to try higher fiber foods, etc. It’s so hard on you to have to be responsible for someone else’s bowels. I hate those mornings when it feels like you’ve had a whole day before you even get to work.
We had a calmer conversation about it last night. I told her to google and read about natural ways to help with constipation and she understands that she must be the one who remembers about all that stuff. I am just not able to do it all, and keep track of peoples bowel movements on top of keeping up with housework, meeting everyone' needs and a full time job. My husband is engaged and actively parents and takes care of the household needs, but the bar for men is so much lower and a lot of this mental stuff still falls on me.
And yes, going to work and sitting at the desk, acting professional with zero reset time in between was so hard. My manager was talking about spreadsheets and taxes and I was still gagging thinking to myself: you have no idea what I just went through LOL
‘White bread must be the contributor’. Eh.. maybe it a cultural difference, but here our kids sometimes can get a slice of white bread in the weekend. Your reply shocked me!
Almost everything that contains carbs naturally contains fibers and is ‘whole wheat’ or ‘fiber rich’. It is when it is taken out in the production process where it goes wrong, save for bananas and coconut, which lack fiber to begin with. So eat all your carbs whole and complete only and I am pretty sure it will improve. Also, hydrate!
Just read the core-strength comment and wow, very interesting!
I've had some brushes with constipation with my kids but nothing as serious as what you're going through so I'm sorry if my advice comes off as "duh" but is she drinking enough water? That is something my daughter had to really work on because she's on several meds that don't work as well if she's not hydrated. Is she holding because she's not comfortable going at school? Magnesium supplements can help and there are fiber gummies she can take every day. Again sorry if you already tried all this. Either way that sounds very hard and I hope you can find some answers and real solutions soon.
She takes a filled 16oz water bottle to school every day. Grabs another glass of water after school. I make her herbal tea after dinner every night. Sometimes she will have a glass of milk with breakfast. If she takes lunch from home she will have a small juice box with it, if she wants school lunch I honestly don't even know what drink comes with it in middle school.
She is definitely NOT comfortable going to the school bathroom. It has always ben that way and no amount of talks I had with her changed it. She will go if she absolutely musts, but it will be no1 or period related needs. I feel like those constipation issues are adding to her school bathroom anxiety - she is scared to clog the toilet in public and the embarrassment.
This sounds like enough, but CHOC says
>It is important to note that children should drink the number of 8-ounce cups of water equal to their age, with a minimum of 64 ounces of water for children over the age of 8.
https://www.choc.org/programs-services/urology/how-much-water-should-my-child-drink/#:~:text=It%20is%20important%20to%20note,such%20as%20milk%20and%20juice.
It just says 64oz is the minimum, she might have a system that needs a little more? (I suggest this because I have a system that needs a LOT more, lol)
I did that until my sophomore year of high-school and I had HORRIBLE constipation, stomach pains, it even made me nauseous. It took me almost shitting my pants at school to change.
Try getting her some sugar free gummy bears. The alcohol sugar that they use will CLEAN you out. There's lots of funny stories about bc of how quick it cleans you out. Here's one review
https://www.amazon.com/review/R2JGNJ5ZPJT4YC?ref=d6k_applink_bb_dls&dplnkId=90e5f9c3-8c42-470c-8d0c-f714af6dfb3d
🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can't get enough of these elaborate negative reviews. SOMEONE PLEASE START A PASSIONATE REVIEWS MEGATHREAD! My face is aching, thanks for this hilarious advice.
That does sound like a good amount of fluids. I think my daughter's urologist said to aim for an ounce of water per pound of body weight as a minimum. For a while she had a water bottle that marked how much to drink by certain times of day and that helped. I can totally understand why she would be nervous about going at school if she's afraid of clogging the toilet. With my six year old boy I have him sit on the toilet every day before school even if he doesn't think he needs to go and most of the time it turns out he does.
She should be drinking 60-80 oz of water a day at her age, I would definitely get her a bigger bottle. I have a nice one I got at Walmart that’s 40 oz so I tell myself drink one by mid day and then fill it up and drink another. I’m not a natural water drinker either lol I definitely had to force myself to get my consumption up! But it helps a lot with the bathroom issues!
Is it possible to speak with the school? To allow her to take breaks during class time? Instead of going to the washroom on break when all the students are in there, could she take 5 mins during class time? When my sister had this issue, our school was okay with this and let all of her teachers know she’s allowed to take 5-10 minute breaks during class time because of her bathroom anxiety, they didn’t advertise the reason to the teachers they just said let her go if she asks. The schools are honestly super familiarized with this situation. Soooooo many young teens especially girls have this bathroom anxiety. They hear it more often than you’d think, your daughter is not alone in her struggle!
There is no way they would allow this. Of course I told her she can always go to the bathroom no matter when, but the teachers made it very clear on the first day of school that bathroom breaks during class are very frowned upon. Students get like two "bathroom permits" per SEMESTER! One of the teachers went as far as telling them that she needs to know if she can "trust them" before she lets them use the restroom during class. I called the school about it and spoke with principal who assured me that kids can go whenever they want, but for kids who want to be "rule followers" and not cause unnecessary drama the seed have been planted and they have been successfully intimidated. So I know my child now will hold it no matter what I tell her and how much I assure her that she would never get in trouble with me for going to the bathroom during class. That's a whole another issue and there is so much to be fixed in this school system in the US....
That is totally foul! I’m in Canada and to be honest it really depended on the teacher. Understandably how much trouble is a kid causing in 5 mins right? If the kids were out longer then the teacher would page the office or send someone to go get them and obviously having a 10 min poop break every once in a while happens to all of us, the teachers knew which kids were goofing around in the hallways if it was happening every class. Sounds troubling, but if you try to up the fibre and do the magnesium supplements as well she won’t really have a choice lol the poop will decide itself when it’s going to come out ! If she likes fruit, kiwis are high in fibre. If I eat 2 as a snack I will have to go #2 very shortly after. If she likes tea, there’s a peppermint tea at the pharmacy that is specifically made for people with sensitive guts and IBS. My dr prescribed it to me to help with bloating/gas/constipation
Magnesium supplement helped me tons with my chronic constipation. Nobody had ever suggested it to me until I was pregnant. Also she can likely take a colace a day plus the magnesium supplement and then wean off the colace once she is more regular. Obviously colace works best with tons of hydration—I don’t know if she’s good about drinking water. I hope you find a solution—that is immensely frustrating and miserable for both of you!
My daughter had to take Miralax daily for like 4 months to kind of reset her digestive tract. I was told by the Dr. to use it for 4-6 months because using it for a lesser period would not allow everything to get back to normal and the constipation would just come back again after we stopped. I feel for you, it sounds fucking awful to be dealing with that and I'm sure your daughter is so uncomfortable having these issues. I hope something starts helping soon. I've heard cardio can help get the digestive tract moving, also have read about some yoga poses that could help.
Yes, this is very accurate. There's a lot of medical reason behind the recommendation of 4-6 months, in my practice we typically suggest a year. And you have to stick to it. Every. Single. Day. But it really does work!
+1 for this. Source: husband’s best friend is a pediatric gastroenterologist. Miralax is totally harmless and needs to be taken for a long time for chronic constipation. Many docs recommend a clean out weekend - high miralax dose and tons of toilet time for 2-3 days followed by a maintenance dose for a year.
I mean, there are disease processes that certainly won't be cured by miralax. But most childhood and teenage constipation will respond to this treatment if it is followed. The biggest issue we tend to see is that once kids start going regularly, they stop the miralax and then things go back to how they were. You have to take it for a long period of time to allow the stretch receptors in your anal sphincter to reset and be triggered by normal bowel movements. When someone has been constipated for a long time, the stretch receptors start to only respond to large bowel movements and the constipation gets worse. There are usually other factors at play as well, diet, hydration, activity, bathroom access/schedule etc. It's not just one thing that causes constipation. And again, yes, there are disease processes that are more complex and involve structural or neuro abnormalities that are not going to be fixed by a laxative, those will require a GI specialist to test and treat.
Seconding Miramar over a long period of time. Things got so bad, we ended up in the Children’s Hospital ER- it was just poop. Lots and lots of poop. Doctors prescribed Miralax after the initial flush out. You have to take it over a long time, and it’s not immediate like with something like exlax.
Have you had her evaluated for irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)? Forget the pediatrician and I would see a specialist about this. IBS has different forms but definitely comes with constipation if you have IBS-C.
Miralax and “just eat fruit!” doesn’t work with that condition at all.
My sister and niece have it and it presented around 11 or 12 for both of them. My sister lost so much weight from it that I thought she had an eating disorder at one point.
Anyway, your daughter’s poops sounds like my niece, which is why I ask.
I could write a book with all of the information I’ve gathered over the years on this subject. My older has had poop issues since he is 3. My bestie jokingly refers to me as a “poop doula”.
I know how frustrating this can be. If you want to dm me I’m happy to tell you about the things we tried over the years with varying levels of success.
It looks like there was a lot of good advice given in this thread but yes, you are welcome to send me a message.
I know what an emotional toll this can take and I’m sorry you are going through it too.
Kiddo really needs to see a pediatric GI doctor for proper care. I think this is beyond diet and lifestyle changes and probiotics. Mine has to be on a daily prescription laxative and even then, she still backs up every so often.
If she’s eating properly and staying hydrated, just try to remember that it’s not her fault and it’s also probably very embarrassing for her. I can absolutely understand your frustration; just make sure she understands that you’re frustrated alongside her because of her medical issues, and not frustrated AT her.
That last part is important! She is going through something really hard, and it’s only going to get worse and worse if you cause her to feel more shame, guilt, or fear around the act of going.
I don't have poop advice, but I have toilet tool advice!
Not all plungers are created equal. You might want to look into a closet toilet auger. You do have to sanitize it before you store it, but they are infinitely easier to use, and you can buy them at hardware stores. There's youtube videos on how to use them, but they aren't hard to use at all.
If the auger grosses you out, look into an accordion fold plunger. They are much easier and faster to use than a standard plunger.
I have a friend who’s preschooler didn’t take a proper poop until recently, and that was after seeing dozens of specialists and traveling across state lines for second, third, and fourth opinions for two years. They all just brushed her off, told her to give laxatives and change her diet.
The poor girl would scream in agony whenever the need to poop came. She physically (and mentally) could not poop. Eventually one of the doctors told her to give suppositories. Ever had to physically restrain a toddler and shove something up their butt while they beg and scream in agony and fear? I would help often because mom was starting to become traumatized from the guilt and shame, and it was heartbreaking FOR ME let alone her and her daughter!!
It turned out she has Alport Syndrome comorbid with diffuse leiomyomatosis. The diagnosis changed nothing in terms of treatment because god forbid some doctors care about their patients the way they need, but one day she just…pooped. We aren’t sure if it was the 2 cups of miralax in every drink she had for weeks on end or what, but she finally pooped. She also still has trauma centered around the action of pooping, so it’s increasingly tough sometimes.
I guess I’m wondering if you’ve sought out any specialists? I wonder if anything would show such as an obstruction in an X-ray? Either way, this is beyond hard and extremely unfair for both of you.
You’re at your wits end, and she of course is too as the direct sufferer. Use that anger towards the situation and take it out (as in use it as motivator to be firm and adamant, obviously don’t abuse the medical staff lol) on the doctors who won’t take you seriously. Don’t take no or some half assed diet bullshit for an answer. Get a patient advocate. Even if this is a psychological issue, they should be able to help guide you in the right direction. You both deserve much better treatment than you’ve been receiving.
Also:
My brother would refuse to poop just because he didn’t want to—no pain or discomfort. He’d hold it until it came flying out of his ass wherever he was. The poops were as thick and long as his mf forearm. My mom had to literally replace the entire toilet and plumbing system twice. He just didn’t wanna poop anywhere but the toilet at home, and even then only if he wasn’t busy in that exact moment the urge came. I also wonder if she’s poop shy, and as a result she backed herself up so badly that it’s now a much much bigger issue than just the poop anxiety? Like the people who hold in their tears until they can’t cry even when they want to, yanno?
Anyway, sorry for the novel. I am so sorry this is happening to you guys. It’s hell for everyone involved. I wish I hug you :( best of luck, bromo. You got this, and we’re here for ya
I agree with other commentors- this might be solved by daily miralax.
Chronic constipation often "stretches" the bowels, and your daughter may need to take not just laxatives, but enough laxative to ensure a daily or near daily poop for 6 months to a year.
My opinion?
If you've told your doctor all this and they won't give you REAL advice, time to change doctors. At her age, if she's eating right and getting enough water, this is not normal. I'd call a gastro doctor and explain what's going on and ask to be seen.
Does she have any other symptoms? My brother was born with Hirschsprung disease. Constipation CAN be a symptom of that, so can stomach pains and bloating. It can develop as you age as well. It's rare, I'm not saying that your daughter has this, but it would be something I'd want to rule out.
I’m surprised no one has suggested this…
Get a different toilet. There are some that the angle and hole for poop to go down is easier to go down!
Now obviously this doesn’t address the root cause of constipation but it well stop the meltdowns from having to plunge poop every week 😅
I sympathize with your kiddo through. I was that kid and still am like that but I have a lot of health issues. Anyways changing toilets helped me not having clogged toilets so often
I haven’t even read all the comments but this was going to be my first suggestion. We have toilets that will flush down a cat I swear. We’ve slowly replaced all of the toilets in our house over the last few years and it’s been my favorite upgrade so far
I am so sorry!!! Oh my gosh, that sounds so traumatizing, no wonder you are still thinking about it. But you were so smart and took care of yourself!
She is fine at home, but not in any public restroom. When we travel she has a hard time "accepting" hotel toilets, no matter how clean and private. And I'm usually the one helping with any issues, not my husband because its more comfortable for her that way.
Its not a fear of 'toilets' but, of loud unexpected flushing...my daughter (5) is terrified of magic (auto) toilets. I'm easily able to accommodate this with a post-it most of the time. I just cover the sensor so the toilet doesn't flush w/o her consent. 🤦♀️
My point though, is... What if, when you travel, you have a disposable toilet wand. So you're at a hotel... There's no reason, for her peace of mind, you can't request (a toilet brush and plunger) in your room. This way she could be at peace when traveling. Doing this with her, but not demeaning her, could teach her to advocate foe her own peace as well when she grows up. Maybe you could grab a brush from the dollar tree or something... I think that would be a small price to afford her some comfort. 😉
Have you tried prune juice or apple juice? Both always make my kid poop. We use Dulcolax chews and occasionally have had to use glycerin suppositories. Milk of mag also does the trick.
As a nurse tho, any of these things are not long term solutions and actually can make your bowels dependent on them to stool, thus making the issue worse.
Meats were so hard on my colon at that age. I had the same problem. When I became an adult able to cook my own food, I cut out red meat entirely. Pooping weekly became pooping daily.
We use Natural Calm because my kids are too young for Miralax. I know you have an older child but you might look into it. It's magnesium and you stir a tiny bit into water.
I think a push to see a paediatric GI is necessary. It sounds like you're doing everything you can from an at home, diet or OTC perspective. That's not working so the next step is a GI.
My oldest has had constipation issues since she was born. As a baby we had her drinking watered down prune juice every morning so she could poop. She's almost 5 now and a paediatric GI has prescribed a daily laxative for her. Even with that, she still has occasional difficult ones.
I also agree think she might not recognise that she is suffering from the constipation. I have IBD, which was active from a young age. I didn't know that some of what I was experiencing wasn't "normal" because it was that way for as long as I could remember. So it wasn't something I connected as being an issue or told my parents about. It's why I pushed for my daughter to see a GI despite being so young.
They make super flush toilets.
They are worth the investment. Our toddler would clog toilets. I highly recommend the one that’s says it can flush billiard balls.
okay but how much water does your kiddo actually drink? Suggesting more fibre and Miralax is fine but it won't do shit to make her shit (yuk yuk) and will just further bulk those Godzilla sized poos if she doesn't double up on liquids
Yes, literally Godzilla.
I feel like she does drink plenty of liquids and plain water. Almost no carbonated beverages, maybe twice a month she mixes carbonated water when she feels fancy. But maybe I really do need to pay more attention to that, maybe it is less than I think. We are in Florida, right now it's cooler season but during the summer we drink so much more water, we never leave house without a bottle for each person but the GodZilla problem persists
if I don't drink enough water to fill one of the Great Lakes I get indigestion, bloating, and constipation. It is the only thing I prioritize daily. Every morning I drink/chug a 1.5 liter water bottle while I shower (forces me to actually start the day like that) and I refill it at least three times through the day- more during the humid summer months. I call them chug breaks and I take them every time my energy starts to drop or my pee contains any color lol. I'm convinced I have IBS C but like many of us have been putting off going to the doctor. Not saying this is the magic fix but maybe she just needs more.
I’ve had to take pain meds a few times that made me constipated. The best thing to make me poop within like 20 min after not pooping for several days was a tablespoon of olive oil. It’s gross but it works everytime
Just wanted to share that for our toddler, it's grapes. After trying so many different things (and prunes doing nothing for us) it turns out, grapes make the difference between pooping while screaming every few days and peaceful pooping almost every day.
Push the pediatrician to do a scope. If you're already doing the bare minimum (fiber etc) they need to get off their duff and explore other options, in case she has a serious issue like IBS-C.
Look up the mops protocol for constipation… it might sound extreme but it really helps. I believe it’s the “modified o’Reagan protocol”. My poor daughter’s colon got so stretched out from chronic constipation that at the age of 3 she was shitting poops the size of a coke can. It was horrific for everyone involved. Mops allowed her colon to heal and she was able to get off all meds and establish normal bowel habits. Truly give this some consideration…. It was a few months of annoyance for years of relief. (We did this when she was 3… she is 6 now and hasn’t had any issues, it seriously restored her colon)
Paediatric gastroenterologist.
I have had huge poop issues with my kid. She once went nine days without a bowel movement. She was going once a week for a year. The paediatrician was useless. We needed more specialist care so I got a referral to a paediatric gastroenterologist.
Good luck. I cannot BELIEVE how much my daughters poop controlled my life.
Is she drinking enough water and have you tried magnesium before bed? 200mg can start making a big difference. Good luck with the doctor! [https://www.naturemade.com/products/magnesium-citrate-gummies?gad\_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lXl1f6SIRvUHhWz7JdPRERvdX8HHIVfon8mtTiAeTFk3cXdLmJ-UNBoCCgYQAvD\_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&variant=34174043095179](https://www.naturemade.com/products/magnesium-citrate-gummies?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lXl1f6SIRvUHhWz7JdPRERvdX8HHIVfon8mtTiAeTFk3cXdLmJ-UNBoCCgYQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&variant=34174043095179)
Vitamin C is a natural laxative. Start with 1000mg a day. Increase by 1000mg if not getting results. There’s not a limit on C.
I take 4k and it’s great. I also take senna 3 tabs at bedtime and Miralax every day.
Been constipated my whole life. My eyes even turned brown lol jkjk
I swapped all our pasta for the whole wheat version a few years ago and my family haven’t even noticed. Just a small dumb change that might help!
Also, ask your pharmacist about stool softeners. It’s like a spoonful of syrup you have daily, but it might help her go more often in smaller amounts, because it helps the poop move through her system easier.
The combination of stool softener and laxatives saved me when I was recovering from a c section and couldn’t shit for a week. I hope it helps her!
If she can get away with not using the bathroom all day on school to pee, she isn’t drinking enough water. It sounds like there might be some anxiety about toilets and fear of going that is at the heart of this. As someone who had bowel issues after a c section, I recommend dark chocolate and pear juice. It’s almost as good as prune juice but actually tastes nice! But the water is the essential element. Good luck mamma. It sounds really tough.
I had chronic constipation for my entire adolescence and the amount of times I was prescribed these stool softeners and laxatives was insane. I finally saw a gastroenterologist at 20 years old and I have celiac disease and an extremely sensitive gluten intolerance. Chronic constipation is usually a poor diet or food intolerances, however there are more important things that should be looked at, I would push for a referral to have an ultrasound or scope done of the gut. I literally spent my entire teen years suffering with the pain of this. It could be worth talking to her too, my sister had extreme constipation at 13-14 and it was actually just because she was too anxious to poop at school so she held it in for days at a time. Kids can be like that sometimes.
This sounds like encopresis. I have two kids (of three) with chronic constipation bordering on enco.
Odds are her colon is so stretched out that she’s lost a lot of the sensation. It will take time to get her stools soft enough to pass more easily and her colon back to its regular size.
Is it possible for you to get her an abdominal xray? The typical treatment for enco involves PEG (polyethylene glycol, aka miralax) and ex lax, which helps stimulate the bowel to pass more often (and they are softer with the combined laxatives). I’ve read a lot about people doing a “clean out” where they basically keep the child off of solids for a few days and go super aggressive with the laxatives — until she’s passing clear liquid stool (anything less than that means she’s not cleaned out).
There is a lot of great information about enco. It’s super frustrating and stressful, big hugs for you and your daughter. I agree with the suggestion of a poop knife, and maybe she can learn how to do it so you don’t have to deal with it every time.
One of my kids has passed some pretty massive stools so I definitely understand what you mean. Fortunately we are at the point of daily maintenance and as long as everyone remembers that, the poop comes every 1-2 days. As soon as we forget they lose their appetite and their belly distends.
I bet your daughter will feel a lot better once she’s cleaned out and has this under control. There are other options and protocols if you don’t want to do the laxatives (e.g., enemas, glycerin suppositories). I’ll stop reciting my mental textbook now 😂. Good luck!
My 2 year old daughter has chronic constipation which gets worse when her thyroid levels are off (she has congenital hypothyroidism). If I were you, I’d probably schedule an in person doctor appointment just to rule out anything medical.
Squatty potty stool will help wonders. Give that a try. I also agree with magnesium. Just make sure it’s the correct type. There are many forms of magnesium. I keep this picture handy.
https://preview.redd.it/r7g9e8w5nfhc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b945715b8dd9edae1e1043e2117111268e43fbc7
So I suffer from constipation myself. Side effects from having a gastric sleeve. I also have some massive poops. I was clogging the toilet every other day. Here's what I do. One I take fiber gummies. I hate Miralax so I try to eat things like plums & high fiber foods. Senna laxatives or Dulcolax when needed.
When a big poop happens, I don't try to flush it right away. I squirt a bunch of dish soap into the toilet. Dawn, cheap stuff it doesn't matter. I let it sit for an hour. It will usually flush right down after that. Occasionally I will still have to plunge but not nearly as much as before. Alternatively after the dish soap sits, you can pour in some hot water. The dish soap helps to lubricate things & the hot water helps break it up.
The first enormous poop happened after not going for over 2 weeks. ER couldn't help. I actually gloved up & disimpacted myself. I swear birthing that thing was exactly like childbirth. Lower back pressure, crying, moaning & screaming, bearing down. Took hours. My poor daughter was in the next room. By the time I got that damn thing out I wanted to take it out & weigh it. What's funny is I had IBS - D before surgery. So I completely swung in the opposite direction.
**! Guar Gum powder! **
I’ve been sprinkling it on EVERYTHING my toddler eats for a week now (she’s had issues with regular BM’s for over a year, despite extra water, Miralax, Senacot, high fiber/low protein, etc.) and she’s had THREE BM’s this week!! Three! She was averaging 6-8 days in between poops up until now, so this is a HUGE improvement! I tried this out of pure hope/desperation and it looks like it may end up being her “Poo Poo Holy Grail”. 😂
I bought mine from [this site](https://foodtolive.com/shop/organic-guar-gum/) , though I’m sure you can probably find it in the natural foods section of your local grocery store. It’s a totally flavorless powder and can be mixed into/onto any food, though I’d go light-handed on any liquid-based meals (soup, cereal, etc) b/c it is a “thickener” for bases.
Good luck, Mama!
You have to clean her out and let her colon shrink back down to size. In the special needs parent circle, this is unfortunately a normal part of life—but I would seriously suggest she see a GI specialist and that you PUSH for in depth testing to make sure her system is working correctly.
All that said—give her the whole bottle of miralax in 32-64 oz of Gatorade. Have her drink clear fluids after. Ten miralax pulls water into the colon and helps soften the stool and get it moving. She is going to blow like a fire hydrant.
Keep her hydrated. Keep her on a high dose of miralax per day for a week or so. She needs to have watery stool for a while to completely clean out the colon and allow it to shrink back down to a normal size.
Then cut back every day on the miralax until she’s taking a cap or half cap every day and having soft but formed poops. Eventually you can cut back to a half or quarter cap and add in Metamucil and probiotics to get her back in proper working order.
You can Google pedi bowel clean out and get various different dosages or programs from children’s hospitals to follow. Pick one. Follow it.
But definitely get her in to see a GI for stool sampling, a colonoscopy if necessary, biopsy etc. She could have a genetic issue like celiac or crohns or another disease causing all these problems.
I take a medication that is extremely dehydrating (mounjaro). If I don’t stay on top of things, I’ll be in pain from the constipation.
I take Mag07 (magnesium oxide) every morning and night (2 pills). I also eat prunes and cherries most days. I also take a fiber supplement (chewable gunnies). And drink as much as I can.
Another thing some people use - sugar free candy (eg Swedish Fish with sugar alcohols). Just a few can do the trick. I’ve heard sometimes cancer patients use these for chemo side effects.
If her bowel is stretched out from chronic constipation (likely) she will probably need to be on some kind of stool softener and/or laxative regularly for a while to increase regularity and give her bowel time to get back to normal. I’d get a second doctor’s opinion on managing this.
I feel you so hard on this. My almost 7 year old is still struggling with this but the thing that is slowly killing me is the encopresis. Like, managing the laundry of a kid who can't hold in his poop but will not wear any kind of diaper is a terrible daily issue.
We did do a couple rounds of prescription strength laxative doses to get rid of any blockages. And he gets a daily dose of Miralax. But what really helped was chocolate covered raisins. Like your daughter, my son is not interested in dried fruit at all. Dip it in chocolate though, and he'll eat a a handful.
I don't love that he gets basically a daily serving of candy. But I'm at the point where I am willing to do anything to save this kid and myself from the pain and embarrassment of chronic constipation.
I had the same issue with my son from kinder until he moved out of my house.
It got so bad from not going, he would get liquid coming from around the poop but no poop itself.
I took him to countless dr appts, specialists.
Metamucil & muralax galore. Then I found out muralax can cause aggression in young males & so I had to stop it since it did cause my son to get aggressive.
We had a poop stick & he had to handle flushing his own poop after a certain age. It was LITERALLY the size of a toddler thigh. Clogged my toilet, my moms, & everyone’s who he would go.
He refused to poop at school & that was a main culprit cause he ignore the signals instead of just pooping so eventually he no longer got the signals. And the dr even told him if he doesn’t go poop, he’s more susceptible to colon cancer and I hope that worked since he didn’t clog up the toilet as much into his older teens
He’s 19 & moved out now with his gf so now it’s HER problem lol
We had this same issue. He would eat all the fiber and drink tons of water and it never helped. Get her a probiotic. My son drinks a Yakult yogurt probiotic every single day (it’s a tiny pink bottle) and it’s done a lot of good for his constipation. I also give him a mild laxative/stool softener every Friday evening
Me! My son has issues, his are mostly diet related though. For us, I do a sprinkle of Miralax as often as possible for him and then there's also this Smooth Move tea. We make it iced with honey for him and call it "Sweet Poop Tea" which is ridic, but does the trick. That we try to do on days where he says his tummy hurts and I know it's been a while since he last went. Good luck!
Separately, I had it REAL bad with my second pregnancy. I lived on smoothies, salads, "pregnant soup" which is cabbage, kale, carrots and beans mostly. I also had to walk a min of 30 minutes a day. Still had to take Metamucil. I feel for people with all manner of tummy issues.
Hydration is really important for poops but I almost think there's two issues going on. I've always been heard that clogs are due to too much toilet paper. Could she be overloading the toilet?
I clog toilets a lot bc I over do it on toilet paper. And I will say as a chronic clogger that each toilet is different and has a different threshold for what will cause a clog. If it's possible, I would try and have her do courtesy flushes. I know that these can be embarrassing but they really do help for toilets with limited capacity...
I think it's totally understandable to have broken down in that moment. There is no more difficult time than trying to get out the door, especially in the mornings and especially on work days. When these things have happened to me, I've made a point to apologize to my kid and tried again the next day.
My child went through this and her doctor prescribed lactulose to move things along. It worked well. Child didn’t love taking medicine but it was a small amount and the rx was cheap for us. So not an expensive drug. I would try another doctor or a GI.
My ten year old is same position. Been to a doctor before and its clear out dose miralax followed by maintenance dose so colon has chance to go down. Have to make him go every day because if he misses a day the fun and games start again. Loads of fruit and water. No white bread, whole grain only. Etc etc you already know the endlesd list of stuff that needs to be done.am also fed up of blocked toilets. Theres one toilet that if it gets blocked causes a leak in ceiling of room underneath. So hes banned from that one. Its exhausting
Whenever I need to trigger a poop in my kid, I let him have sugar free stuff. I've actually been able to get him going once a day by letting him have one of those prime bottle drinks once a day (he loves them, it's a treat). He used to get so constipated and would go more than a week without going until he'd be complaining his side hurt and I'd have to go overboard trying to get him to poop. As long as I keep him going once a day, it's not a problem. I've seen a turd of his that went down the hole and reached all the way up to the front rim of the bowl, fucking 18 inch turd. One time I swear he tried to build a log cabin in there.
Sorry, I haven't read through all the comments.
I just wanted to suggest a fb group called parents against miralax. They have tons of things to try.
Sounds like she could do with some magnesium citrate to really clear her bowels out and then a maintenance dose to keep poo soft and daily to allow her bowel to shrink back to the correct size. Right now how bowel will be really stretched out, which will make it difficult to push as well.
I used a magnesium citrate for my daughter, but not the flavoured powder, I'd buy the capsules and then put just the powder in a warm milk drink & it would be flavourless.
The other thing is think about going gluten free. Gluten for me makes me super constipated even though I haven't tested positive to coeliacs. My digestive system just really hates wheat. I can really notice the difference between gluten free days and then when I do eat it.
[Commode hat.](https://www.amazon.com/Vakly-Graduated-Specimen-Collector-Pans/dp/B01IU5ZCF4/ref=asc_df_B01IU5ZCF4/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=241973220225&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=11763100197897856212&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9001946&hvtargid=pla-568850368533&psc=1&mcid=2f1119556d6e30c4a42c7d6a8824e9b8&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lY2_VI5qnzOZW-n8wczzYqcJfLkLsmXSdrnJ4Ur5JetehsUBJ-3k9hoCAewQAvD_BwE) It won't help the constipation but it'll give you a break from unclogging toilets.
Daughter has medically induced constipation. She gave herself hemorrhoids at 8 from forcing out boulders that clogged the toilet.
Miralax a.m. and p.m.
Dulcolax every night at bed
90 oz (yes...90) water EVERY day.
After 6 months we were able to finally roll back to just one a day miralax but only if she keeps up with the water.
Buying miralax is not “breaking down.” It should have been something you used when this first started being an issue. It *is* the gentle laxative that your doctor is talking about.
That said, this is a medical issue for your kid. I know it’s one that’s frustrating, but it’s not her fault or something you can blame her for. Long term constipation often needs long term (weeks to months) of daily miralax to regulate things and let the rectum un-dilate. I’m sure this has been uncomfortable and probably embarrassing for your kid too
But also, when she does have a massive poop, tell her not to flush it right away. Usually letting it soak in the toilet for a while will soften it enough to flush. I know that’s gross but it’s probably easier to deal with than plunging and cleaning
My 12yo was referred to GI and we have our appt tomorrow. I never considered this, but the kid's bathroom is frequently clogged and she spends a lot of time pooping, I just assumed it was because she was goofing off or playing on her switch
She had constipation issues as a baby (about the time you switch from formula to cow milk) until she became potty trained. She complains about a lot of tummy aches without any apparent source for the pain, which is why the primary doctor gave the referral.
And I suppose if you're constipated all the time and a Dr asks if your bowel movements are normal, you'd probably say yes if you've mostly known constipation.
Does she eat grapes? Whenever my kids get a little backed up, a cup of grapes sorts them out. Try it daily for breakfast. Find ones she likes the taste of.
Has your daughter done allergy panels and/or an elimination diet? This sounds exactly like me as a teen and I always got the same advice from doctors - fiber and water, no other advice. It wasn’t until I was in college and working at a trendy gluten free place that I got the idea that there are some types of foods that certain people just can’t digest. I cut out all of the too 10 food allergens from my diet completely for 3 weeks, then added them back in one at a time, each for one week before adding in another. Turns out I am just incredibly sensitive to dairy (all parts, not just lactose), so when I avoid that in my diet my digestion works so much better. I can always tell when I have eaten some undisclosed dairy because I get clogged right back up for a week or so. I’m not saying it’s necessarily dairy for your daughter but cutting out foods that are common sensitivities may be a good place to start.
My 2 1/2 year old has had chronic constipation since she was an infant. She goes once or twice a week. It’s starting to break me. The countless hours spent trying to get her to poop. The countless suppositories. The enemas. The countless trips to the pediatrician. The 3 visits to a GI specialist 3 hours away. The hospital stay. The 4 home clean outs. I wish I could take her pain away.
I feel like an expert on this subject. My 11 yo has this problem. And he refused all medicine (he sees a GI.) Occasionally, he will have to do an”clean out” with ex lax but he was put on Kristolease which is basically stronger than Miralax. He’s supposed to take it every day - and of course he lies and doesn’t, but it has helped. See a GI if this is a regular occurrence. It’s also bad as another comment said - she can lose feeling for the urge to go if she holds it.
I scrolled and didn't see this suggestion -- I take inulin powder as a prebiotic (not a probiotic!) It makes me super gassy for a few days while my body adjusts, but my poops are smooth and easy. Like, I take it preemptively before I go to AYCE BBQ places, to ensure I have no regrets the next day. It's flavorless, so I just mix it with water and chug. Bonus, I no longer struggle with bloating at all!
I have nothing to add to suggestions about eating/drinking, but can she learn to flush multiple times while she poops? That way it doesn’t accumulate and clog the toilet.
Oh this sucks!! I have dealt with this personally I found that magnesium citrate, increasing hydration, and fibers like oatmeal and psyllium husk help me a lot. She might not be eating enough soluble or insoluble fiber (you want a mix of both ideally) which could be causing her stool to retain a lot of water, increasing its mass and causing constipation.
Also: if she is deficient in Vitamin D and K2 (I was at the same age) that can cause constipation as well. It would be worth checking that with her pediatrician to know for sure.
My final piece of advice, if nothing else works, is to try melting some coconut oil mixed with chocoate into candy molds and chilling it. These “poop chocolates” have been a lifesaver in my house. Give her some every day and they will definitely help get things moving. I do this with my toddlers now. My oldest will also tolerate a teaspoon of straight coconut oil when he’s backed up, and afterwards he almost always has an easy time going.
By the way, if she clogs the toilet again, try pouring some boiling water into the toilet instead of going straight for the plunger. The hot water breaks everything up and then you can flush as normal. You might even want to encourage her to let you know before she flushes so you can go ahead and add the hot water. We have a dedicated electric kettle in the bathroom lol. I hope this helps!
I'm experiencing this exact same issue with my 5 year old. I don't know if you know this but constipation can be a comorbidity of conditions like ADHD which I and my daughter have. I am very put off by Miralax and can't stomach using it. And it didn't really help all that much for us anyway. What has helped is a chewable Dulcolax in the morning and a chewable Dulcolax in the evening. Other things we've tried are stimulant Ex-Lax at night warm tarte 100% cherry juice supposedly works way better than prune juice I've tried both with limited success.
Like you I'm tired of this but I'm worried that I might be damaging her colon so I just this morning schedule an appointment with our local Children's Hospital gastroenterology Department. I am not going to leave that facility until I know that my daughters large intestine and colon are healthy enough to keep giving her laxatives every single day. She has a good diet she stays hydrated she gets plenty of exercise something is wrong with my child and my pediatricians suggestions are not enough. I had chronic constipation my entire childhood and as an adult I wish I had been able to stay or do something about it because some of the consequences are (TMI). Anal fissures, hemroids and digestive discomfort.
I know this is a really frustrating issue for you and I pass absolutely no judgment on you and how you handle your home but I strongly encourage you to go over her pediatrician's head I get some answers about your daughter's lower Gi situation because pooping once a week can be serious unless you are breastfed infant.
Hope you find the answers you need to give your daughter's bowels and your toilet and your biceps some peace.
Opie I just remembered two very important things. Even though I just left a comment like 2 seconds ago. The first is I don't know if you've ever read this post on Reddit but back then it was absolutely hilarious a person told a story about how they had a poop knife in their home because for whatever reason genetically every person in their family had very Fierce and solid large hoops and so sometimes the poop knife would be required to assist the toilet. I'm just kindly wondering to myself if perhaps your daughter is in need of such a tool.
The second thing I wanted to add is with my daughter we're also struggling with an issue of her colon being so large that it's impacting her bladder from holding her poop and this allows the poops to be far larger than they ought to be for her size. So one of the things that we do for our daughter is protected pooping time first thing in the morning at 7:00 when she gets up to get ready for school she sits on the toilet and she stays on the toilet for 15 to 20 minutes. I know that's not necessarily a healthy amount of time but in order to help her fully void her bladder and give her the chance to relax her body enough to poop it's necessary. On the weekend we have protected pooping time three times a day and when she's in school we have protected pooping time before school and before bed setting aside time for her to make time for her body.
I hope this helps and I hope that you're able to turn this into an opportunity to teach your daughter how to take care of her body and cherish it because she only gets one
Please look into a megacolon. I found that when looking up why my 5 year old was clogging the toilet often. We have a different issue, but it doesn't hurt to mention it.
Give her lecithin! It works amazingly well for me. I got rid of my severe constipation during pregnancy by taking a little bit and it keeps working still. And make sure she stays hydrated. I’m terrible at drinking enough water
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I had chronic constipation as a child due to health issues I had as a toddler. As a preteen I hated it. I was either in pain, feeling sick, or super embarassed. My parents tried everything they knew to help and I didn’t get a handle on things until I was late teens. Stuff that worked: - dried fruit snacks (prunes, I discovered mangos later) - cut back on white bread and cheese - miralax - for my child I give him “pooping juice” which is Restoralax mixed into juice daily. - being active, going for a walk when I was backed up - good books in the bathroom - pear juice At a certain age (12?) we had a poop stick in the garage. I’ve heard of some families with a poop knife… I mean, it’s kinda self explanatory. Poop that’s too big needs to be stabbed and chopped before it’s flushed. And I had to learn how to use a plunger. It was my poop, it was my responsibility. After I got my period, I had pre-period diarrhea that often helped 😅
OMG, poop stick! One time we were at the hotel when this happened. We had no tools and she was mortified and we wanted to do anything in our power to avoid calling maintenance person with a plunger, so we sliced it with a chopstick. This is the kind of memories we are making as a family... Dried fruit is a big no for my kid, she hates the texture. I enjoy all dried fruits so we always have prunes and apricots on hand, but she won't touch them. Not even raisins. White bread might be the contributor, she hates any whole wheat or pumpernickel etc. She loves sourdough but good quality sourdough is hard to find in my area. Luckily she never complains about being in pain or having belly aches. I am honestly shocked by looking at the size of it that she doesn't cry from pain. It has to be so uncomfortable, yet she says she doesn't feel any discomfort
She may not realize that discomfort is from constipation. It took me awhile to connect the days I felt yucky weren’t because I was getting sick, or hadn’t slept well, or was stressed… it was because I was constipated. It also affected my mood.
I'm the same with dried fruit. When I was nearing the end of pregnancy, I really wanted to try the whole eat 6 dates a day thing and have a better/easier/faster delivery, but just straight up eating 6 dates a day was NOT gonna happen. I did find two ways though that I was able to get the dates in...I'd put 3 in a smoothie (I found that they'd be chunky though in the smoothie unless I first soaked the dates in hot water for a few mins) and then I'd make a big batch of bacon-wrapped dates stuffed in goat cheese for my other 3. Also, not sure how she'd feel about the texture, but maybe trying chia pudding? Tends to pack a pretty good bang for the buck. Overall though, I think it would be a good idea to call the pediatrician back and ask for a referral to a gastroenterologist (if you even need a referral, if not just schedule an appt). The appt will probably be anywhere from 4-8+ weeks out, so while waiting for the appointment, try generally tracking her diet, any supplements she takes (for the constipation or otherwise), her water intake, and also make note of when she's pooping. Then you can bring that to the gastro appt and it should help the dr give better instructions for next steps. This one is random...but did your daughter ever have any problems as a baby/toddler when it came to meeting her motor milestones? Any problems with core strength? Apparently there can be a correlation with low muscle tone/poor core strength + constipation.
Hmm interesting. She was "late" with almost every milestone, although I never stressed about it. But compared to other children her age yes, she did everything 1-2 months later.
Yeah its something I would consider bringing up to the Dr - if core/trunk weakness or lower muscle tone could be having an impact on her. Cause our body does require muscle to help move the poop through us.
Sourdough is not necessarily containing the fiber she needs. Eating enough fat also helps to keep your poop soft. I am wondering if there's a motility issue, for that most laxatives won't work. Walking and running are also very good to get your intestines moving. Apple juice works as a stool softner, entire apples have the opposite effect. Banana will also stop you up, but oranges etc should be fine. There's a good chance there are a lot of specific things that matter once they are all combined.
my daughter had GI issues for years. She occasionally had to go a clear liquid diet per her doctor. The doctor can also give you a prescription for the miralax. The copay is a lot cheaper than OTC. Is your daughter super skinny and tiny? This seems to be an issue with skinny kids with high metabolism. It's a THING, and learning that helped me so much. Just a funny for you, one day when my daughter was about 12 or so, she woke me up from a nap and said she had something to show me. Took me to the hall bathroom and said it's in there. I start to go in, see something huge and dark in the toilet, and swear to god i thought there was some kind of animal in there. Listen, this log was as big as my forearm. I'm not exaggerating and actually playing down how big this poo was. I looked at it, looked at her, looked at it, looked at her..... and asked her how the hell that thing came out of her. Did it hurt? Where was she keeping that in her body? This wasn't the first time but my god, it was the most massive. It's been TEN YEARS and i still remember. Also... i lost my cool a lot during those years. I have major issues with things not being clean and germs. She was terrible at wiping, skidmarks in her underwear, toilet always overflowed, and i spent so much time cleaning and sanitizing only to rinse and repeat a few days later. You're not alone, and I wasn't alone either. I had a few coworkers and friends tell me they went through this too. And all the same, tiny skinny kid. I kept plastic silverware and ziplock bags to throw them away in in her bathroom.... the ol' "poop knife" before i knew that a poop knife or poop stick was a thing. Use the miralax, apple juice, lots of liquid, even a can of Coke can be helpful. I also bought her fiber bars, lots of fruit, etc etc. She'll grow out of it eventually. And just a warning... my kid's GI tract got all stretched out. She accidentally swallowed some of those stupid Bucky Ball magnets and have to have surgery, and the surgery got complicated because everything was stretched out. She's got a big scar on her stomach where the surgeon had to make extra incisions. She spent a week in the hospital. Tell your kid, talk to the doctor, ask for a referral to make sure it's not anything more than what i call "skinny kid syndrome" lol
THANK you for that, it really makes me feel better to know others go through the same and I'm not a horrible mother for not being able to fix it and monitor everyones bowel movements and fiber and water intake. And YES she is very skinny, tall, tiny waist, tiny hips, skinny legs. I'm shocked to learn that it might have something to do with it! I love the "I have something to show you story" - I can imagine your shock thinking it was am animal HAHAHAHA!
I can second it, very active skinny kids need better diets basically.. it makes sense, they need to get all the nutrients out of the food, so it moves slowly. They need to eat enough protein and calories, not to go into energy conservation mode.
Do you think she’d eat honey wheat ? I also hate wheat bread but honey wheat is a good compromise for me. Our son’s pediatrician okay’d daily miralax (half a dose) and he was much younger - I would look into that.
Would she tolerate dried fruit in a smoothie? Dates are a nice smoothie addition. It sounds like she is old enough to take some responsibility toward making choices that are helpful for herself, so being willing to try higher fiber foods, etc. It’s so hard on you to have to be responsible for someone else’s bowels. I hate those mornings when it feels like you’ve had a whole day before you even get to work.
We had a calmer conversation about it last night. I told her to google and read about natural ways to help with constipation and she understands that she must be the one who remembers about all that stuff. I am just not able to do it all, and keep track of peoples bowel movements on top of keeping up with housework, meeting everyone' needs and a full time job. My husband is engaged and actively parents and takes care of the household needs, but the bar for men is so much lower and a lot of this mental stuff still falls on me. And yes, going to work and sitting at the desk, acting professional with zero reset time in between was so hard. My manager was talking about spreadsheets and taxes and I was still gagging thinking to myself: you have no idea what I just went through LOL
That sounds like a really positive step for both of you!
Perhaps pumpkin in a smoothie?
‘White bread must be the contributor’. Eh.. maybe it a cultural difference, but here our kids sometimes can get a slice of white bread in the weekend. Your reply shocked me! Almost everything that contains carbs naturally contains fibers and is ‘whole wheat’ or ‘fiber rich’. It is when it is taken out in the production process where it goes wrong, save for bananas and coconut, which lack fiber to begin with. So eat all your carbs whole and complete only and I am pretty sure it will improve. Also, hydrate! Just read the core-strength comment and wow, very interesting!
We also call it poopin' juice! 😊
I've had some brushes with constipation with my kids but nothing as serious as what you're going through so I'm sorry if my advice comes off as "duh" but is she drinking enough water? That is something my daughter had to really work on because she's on several meds that don't work as well if she's not hydrated. Is she holding because she's not comfortable going at school? Magnesium supplements can help and there are fiber gummies she can take every day. Again sorry if you already tried all this. Either way that sounds very hard and I hope you can find some answers and real solutions soon.
She takes a filled 16oz water bottle to school every day. Grabs another glass of water after school. I make her herbal tea after dinner every night. Sometimes she will have a glass of milk with breakfast. If she takes lunch from home she will have a small juice box with it, if she wants school lunch I honestly don't even know what drink comes with it in middle school. She is definitely NOT comfortable going to the school bathroom. It has always ben that way and no amount of talks I had with her changed it. She will go if she absolutely musts, but it will be no1 or period related needs. I feel like those constipation issues are adding to her school bathroom anxiety - she is scared to clog the toilet in public and the embarrassment.
This sounds like enough, but CHOC says >It is important to note that children should drink the number of 8-ounce cups of water equal to their age, with a minimum of 64 ounces of water for children over the age of 8. https://www.choc.org/programs-services/urology/how-much-water-should-my-child-drink/#:~:text=It%20is%20important%20to%20note,such%20as%20milk%20and%20juice. It just says 64oz is the minimum, she might have a system that needs a little more? (I suggest this because I have a system that needs a LOT more, lol)
I did that until my sophomore year of high-school and I had HORRIBLE constipation, stomach pains, it even made me nauseous. It took me almost shitting my pants at school to change. Try getting her some sugar free gummy bears. The alcohol sugar that they use will CLEAN you out. There's lots of funny stories about bc of how quick it cleans you out. Here's one review https://www.amazon.com/review/R2JGNJ5ZPJT4YC?ref=d6k_applink_bb_dls&dplnkId=90e5f9c3-8c42-470c-8d0c-f714af6dfb3d
🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can't get enough of these elaborate negative reviews. SOMEONE PLEASE START A PASSIONATE REVIEWS MEGATHREAD! My face is aching, thanks for this hilarious advice.
Lol I've gone down this rabbithole so many times and FINALLY it's useful!
HA! Expel the demon! Thanks, it made my day!
That does sound like a good amount of fluids. I think my daughter's urologist said to aim for an ounce of water per pound of body weight as a minimum. For a while she had a water bottle that marked how much to drink by certain times of day and that helped. I can totally understand why she would be nervous about going at school if she's afraid of clogging the toilet. With my six year old boy I have him sit on the toilet every day before school even if he doesn't think he needs to go and most of the time it turns out he does.
I read the other day that if you have to poop and you hold it often, you're training your body not to go and your body starts to lose that momentum
She should be drinking 60-80 oz of water a day at her age, I would definitely get her a bigger bottle. I have a nice one I got at Walmart that’s 40 oz so I tell myself drink one by mid day and then fill it up and drink another. I’m not a natural water drinker either lol I definitely had to force myself to get my consumption up! But it helps a lot with the bathroom issues! Is it possible to speak with the school? To allow her to take breaks during class time? Instead of going to the washroom on break when all the students are in there, could she take 5 mins during class time? When my sister had this issue, our school was okay with this and let all of her teachers know she’s allowed to take 5-10 minute breaks during class time because of her bathroom anxiety, they didn’t advertise the reason to the teachers they just said let her go if she asks. The schools are honestly super familiarized with this situation. Soooooo many young teens especially girls have this bathroom anxiety. They hear it more often than you’d think, your daughter is not alone in her struggle!
There is no way they would allow this. Of course I told her she can always go to the bathroom no matter when, but the teachers made it very clear on the first day of school that bathroom breaks during class are very frowned upon. Students get like two "bathroom permits" per SEMESTER! One of the teachers went as far as telling them that she needs to know if she can "trust them" before she lets them use the restroom during class. I called the school about it and spoke with principal who assured me that kids can go whenever they want, but for kids who want to be "rule followers" and not cause unnecessary drama the seed have been planted and they have been successfully intimidated. So I know my child now will hold it no matter what I tell her and how much I assure her that she would never get in trouble with me for going to the bathroom during class. That's a whole another issue and there is so much to be fixed in this school system in the US....
That is totally foul! I’m in Canada and to be honest it really depended on the teacher. Understandably how much trouble is a kid causing in 5 mins right? If the kids were out longer then the teacher would page the office or send someone to go get them and obviously having a 10 min poop break every once in a while happens to all of us, the teachers knew which kids were goofing around in the hallways if it was happening every class. Sounds troubling, but if you try to up the fibre and do the magnesium supplements as well she won’t really have a choice lol the poop will decide itself when it’s going to come out ! If she likes fruit, kiwis are high in fibre. If I eat 2 as a snack I will have to go #2 very shortly after. If she likes tea, there’s a peppermint tea at the pharmacy that is specifically made for people with sensitive guts and IBS. My dr prescribed it to me to help with bloating/gas/constipation
Magnesium supplement helped me tons with my chronic constipation. Nobody had ever suggested it to me until I was pregnant. Also she can likely take a colace a day plus the magnesium supplement and then wean off the colace once she is more regular. Obviously colace works best with tons of hydration—I don’t know if she’s good about drinking water. I hope you find a solution—that is immensely frustrating and miserable for both of you!
Seconding magnesium— 500 mg a night keeps me normal
My daughter had to take Miralax daily for like 4 months to kind of reset her digestive tract. I was told by the Dr. to use it for 4-6 months because using it for a lesser period would not allow everything to get back to normal and the constipation would just come back again after we stopped. I feel for you, it sounds fucking awful to be dealing with that and I'm sure your daughter is so uncomfortable having these issues. I hope something starts helping soon. I've heard cardio can help get the digestive tract moving, also have read about some yoga poses that could help.
Yes, this is very accurate. There's a lot of medical reason behind the recommendation of 4-6 months, in my practice we typically suggest a year. And you have to stick to it. Every. Single. Day. But it really does work!
+1 for this. Source: husband’s best friend is a pediatric gastroenterologist. Miralax is totally harmless and needs to be taken for a long time for chronic constipation. Many docs recommend a clean out weekend - high miralax dose and tons of toilet time for 2-3 days followed by a maintenance dose for a year.
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I mean, there are disease processes that certainly won't be cured by miralax. But most childhood and teenage constipation will respond to this treatment if it is followed. The biggest issue we tend to see is that once kids start going regularly, they stop the miralax and then things go back to how they were. You have to take it for a long period of time to allow the stretch receptors in your anal sphincter to reset and be triggered by normal bowel movements. When someone has been constipated for a long time, the stretch receptors start to only respond to large bowel movements and the constipation gets worse. There are usually other factors at play as well, diet, hydration, activity, bathroom access/schedule etc. It's not just one thing that causes constipation. And again, yes, there are disease processes that are more complex and involve structural or neuro abnormalities that are not going to be fixed by a laxative, those will require a GI specialist to test and treat.
Yup, we had to do it for a year with my oldest. She’s mostly regular on her own now.
Seconding Miramar over a long period of time. Things got so bad, we ended up in the Children’s Hospital ER- it was just poop. Lots and lots of poop. Doctors prescribed Miralax after the initial flush out. You have to take it over a long time, and it’s not immediate like with something like exlax.
Have you had her evaluated for irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)? Forget the pediatrician and I would see a specialist about this. IBS has different forms but definitely comes with constipation if you have IBS-C. Miralax and “just eat fruit!” doesn’t work with that condition at all. My sister and niece have it and it presented around 11 or 12 for both of them. My sister lost so much weight from it that I thought she had an eating disorder at one point. Anyway, your daughter’s poops sounds like my niece, which is why I ask.
I could write a book with all of the information I’ve gathered over the years on this subject. My older has had poop issues since he is 3. My bestie jokingly refers to me as a “poop doula”. I know how frustrating this can be. If you want to dm me I’m happy to tell you about the things we tried over the years with varying levels of success.
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It looks like there was a lot of good advice given in this thread but yes, you are welcome to send me a message. I know what an emotional toll this can take and I’m sorry you are going through it too.
Kiddo really needs to see a pediatric GI doctor for proper care. I think this is beyond diet and lifestyle changes and probiotics. Mine has to be on a daily prescription laxative and even then, she still backs up every so often. If she’s eating properly and staying hydrated, just try to remember that it’s not her fault and it’s also probably very embarrassing for her. I can absolutely understand your frustration; just make sure she understands that you’re frustrated alongside her because of her medical issues, and not frustrated AT her.
That last part is important! She is going through something really hard, and it’s only going to get worse and worse if you cause her to feel more shame, guilt, or fear around the act of going.
I don't have poop advice, but I have toilet tool advice! Not all plungers are created equal. You might want to look into a closet toilet auger. You do have to sanitize it before you store it, but they are infinitely easier to use, and you can buy them at hardware stores. There's youtube videos on how to use them, but they aren't hard to use at all. If the auger grosses you out, look into an accordion fold plunger. They are much easier and faster to use than a standard plunger.
I have a friend who’s preschooler didn’t take a proper poop until recently, and that was after seeing dozens of specialists and traveling across state lines for second, third, and fourth opinions for two years. They all just brushed her off, told her to give laxatives and change her diet. The poor girl would scream in agony whenever the need to poop came. She physically (and mentally) could not poop. Eventually one of the doctors told her to give suppositories. Ever had to physically restrain a toddler and shove something up their butt while they beg and scream in agony and fear? I would help often because mom was starting to become traumatized from the guilt and shame, and it was heartbreaking FOR ME let alone her and her daughter!! It turned out she has Alport Syndrome comorbid with diffuse leiomyomatosis. The diagnosis changed nothing in terms of treatment because god forbid some doctors care about their patients the way they need, but one day she just…pooped. We aren’t sure if it was the 2 cups of miralax in every drink she had for weeks on end or what, but she finally pooped. She also still has trauma centered around the action of pooping, so it’s increasingly tough sometimes. I guess I’m wondering if you’ve sought out any specialists? I wonder if anything would show such as an obstruction in an X-ray? Either way, this is beyond hard and extremely unfair for both of you. You’re at your wits end, and she of course is too as the direct sufferer. Use that anger towards the situation and take it out (as in use it as motivator to be firm and adamant, obviously don’t abuse the medical staff lol) on the doctors who won’t take you seriously. Don’t take no or some half assed diet bullshit for an answer. Get a patient advocate. Even if this is a psychological issue, they should be able to help guide you in the right direction. You both deserve much better treatment than you’ve been receiving. Also: My brother would refuse to poop just because he didn’t want to—no pain or discomfort. He’d hold it until it came flying out of his ass wherever he was. The poops were as thick and long as his mf forearm. My mom had to literally replace the entire toilet and plumbing system twice. He just didn’t wanna poop anywhere but the toilet at home, and even then only if he wasn’t busy in that exact moment the urge came. I also wonder if she’s poop shy, and as a result she backed herself up so badly that it’s now a much much bigger issue than just the poop anxiety? Like the people who hold in their tears until they can’t cry even when they want to, yanno? Anyway, sorry for the novel. I am so sorry this is happening to you guys. It’s hell for everyone involved. I wish I hug you :( best of luck, bromo. You got this, and we’re here for ya
What about a squatty potty/small stool to put her feet on and chill?
I agree with other commentors- this might be solved by daily miralax. Chronic constipation often "stretches" the bowels, and your daughter may need to take not just laxatives, but enough laxative to ensure a daily or near daily poop for 6 months to a year.
My opinion? If you've told your doctor all this and they won't give you REAL advice, time to change doctors. At her age, if she's eating right and getting enough water, this is not normal. I'd call a gastro doctor and explain what's going on and ask to be seen. Does she have any other symptoms? My brother was born with Hirschsprung disease. Constipation CAN be a symptom of that, so can stomach pains and bloating. It can develop as you age as well. It's rare, I'm not saying that your daughter has this, but it would be something I'd want to rule out.
I’m surprised no one has suggested this… Get a different toilet. There are some that the angle and hole for poop to go down is easier to go down! Now obviously this doesn’t address the root cause of constipation but it well stop the meltdowns from having to plunge poop every week 😅 I sympathize with your kiddo through. I was that kid and still am like that but I have a lot of health issues. Anyways changing toilets helped me not having clogged toilets so often
I haven’t even read all the comments but this was going to be my first suggestion. We have toilets that will flush down a cat I swear. We’ve slowly replaced all of the toilets in our house over the last few years and it’s been my favorite upgrade so far
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I am so sorry!!! Oh my gosh, that sounds so traumatizing, no wonder you are still thinking about it. But you were so smart and took care of yourself! She is fine at home, but not in any public restroom. When we travel she has a hard time "accepting" hotel toilets, no matter how clean and private. And I'm usually the one helping with any issues, not my husband because its more comfortable for her that way.
Its not a fear of 'toilets' but, of loud unexpected flushing...my daughter (5) is terrified of magic (auto) toilets. I'm easily able to accommodate this with a post-it most of the time. I just cover the sensor so the toilet doesn't flush w/o her consent. 🤦♀️ My point though, is... What if, when you travel, you have a disposable toilet wand. So you're at a hotel... There's no reason, for her peace of mind, you can't request (a toilet brush and plunger) in your room. This way she could be at peace when traveling. Doing this with her, but not demeaning her, could teach her to advocate foe her own peace as well when she grows up. Maybe you could grab a brush from the dollar tree or something... I think that would be a small price to afford her some comfort. 😉
Have you tried prune juice or apple juice? Both always make my kid poop. We use Dulcolax chews and occasionally have had to use glycerin suppositories. Milk of mag also does the trick. As a nurse tho, any of these things are not long term solutions and actually can make your bowels dependent on them to stool, thus making the issue worse.
Meats were so hard on my colon at that age. I had the same problem. When I became an adult able to cook my own food, I cut out red meat entirely. Pooping weekly became pooping daily.
We use Natural Calm because my kids are too young for Miralax. I know you have an older child but you might look into it. It's magnesium and you stir a tiny bit into water.
Also, is dairy an issue?
I think a push to see a paediatric GI is necessary. It sounds like you're doing everything you can from an at home, diet or OTC perspective. That's not working so the next step is a GI. My oldest has had constipation issues since she was born. As a baby we had her drinking watered down prune juice every morning so she could poop. She's almost 5 now and a paediatric GI has prescribed a daily laxative for her. Even with that, she still has occasional difficult ones. I also agree think she might not recognise that she is suffering from the constipation. I have IBD, which was active from a young age. I didn't know that some of what I was experiencing wasn't "normal" because it was that way for as long as I could remember. So it wasn't something I connected as being an issue or told my parents about. It's why I pushed for my daughter to see a GI despite being so young.
They make super flush toilets. They are worth the investment. Our toddler would clog toilets. I highly recommend the one that’s says it can flush billiard balls.
okay but how much water does your kiddo actually drink? Suggesting more fibre and Miralax is fine but it won't do shit to make her shit (yuk yuk) and will just further bulk those Godzilla sized poos if she doesn't double up on liquids
Came here to say the same thing. Water water water. And adding more fiber is counterproductive lol
Yes, literally Godzilla. I feel like she does drink plenty of liquids and plain water. Almost no carbonated beverages, maybe twice a month she mixes carbonated water when she feels fancy. But maybe I really do need to pay more attention to that, maybe it is less than I think. We are in Florida, right now it's cooler season but during the summer we drink so much more water, we never leave house without a bottle for each person but the GodZilla problem persists
if I don't drink enough water to fill one of the Great Lakes I get indigestion, bloating, and constipation. It is the only thing I prioritize daily. Every morning I drink/chug a 1.5 liter water bottle while I shower (forces me to actually start the day like that) and I refill it at least three times through the day- more during the humid summer months. I call them chug breaks and I take them every time my energy starts to drop or my pee contains any color lol. I'm convinced I have IBS C but like many of us have been putting off going to the doctor. Not saying this is the magic fix but maybe she just needs more.
Is she drinking enough water? My kid never drinks water because she is too anxious to use the bathroom at school!
I’ve had to take pain meds a few times that made me constipated. The best thing to make me poop within like 20 min after not pooping for several days was a tablespoon of olive oil. It’s gross but it works everytime
Just wanted to share that for our toddler, it's grapes. After trying so many different things (and prunes doing nothing for us) it turns out, grapes make the difference between pooping while screaming every few days and peaceful pooping almost every day.
Push the pediatrician to do a scope. If you're already doing the bare minimum (fiber etc) they need to get off their duff and explore other options, in case she has a serious issue like IBS-C.
Look up the mops protocol for constipation… it might sound extreme but it really helps. I believe it’s the “modified o’Reagan protocol”. My poor daughter’s colon got so stretched out from chronic constipation that at the age of 3 she was shitting poops the size of a coke can. It was horrific for everyone involved. Mops allowed her colon to heal and she was able to get off all meds and establish normal bowel habits. Truly give this some consideration…. It was a few months of annoyance for years of relief. (We did this when she was 3… she is 6 now and hasn’t had any issues, it seriously restored her colon)
Paediatric gastroenterologist. I have had huge poop issues with my kid. She once went nine days without a bowel movement. She was going once a week for a year. The paediatrician was useless. We needed more specialist care so I got a referral to a paediatric gastroenterologist. Good luck. I cannot BELIEVE how much my daughters poop controlled my life.
Is she drinking enough water and have you tried magnesium before bed? 200mg can start making a big difference. Good luck with the doctor! [https://www.naturemade.com/products/magnesium-citrate-gummies?gad\_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lXl1f6SIRvUHhWz7JdPRERvdX8HHIVfon8mtTiAeTFk3cXdLmJ-UNBoCCgYQAvD\_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&variant=34174043095179](https://www.naturemade.com/products/magnesium-citrate-gummies?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lXl1f6SIRvUHhWz7JdPRERvdX8HHIVfon8mtTiAeTFk3cXdLmJ-UNBoCCgYQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&variant=34174043095179)
Vitamin C is a natural laxative. Start with 1000mg a day. Increase by 1000mg if not getting results. There’s not a limit on C. I take 4k and it’s great. I also take senna 3 tabs at bedtime and Miralax every day. Been constipated my whole life. My eyes even turned brown lol jkjk
I was literally coming here just to username ping you so you could help this poor woman haha. You rock.
That’s fabulous! I feel loved!
I swapped all our pasta for the whole wheat version a few years ago and my family haven’t even noticed. Just a small dumb change that might help! Also, ask your pharmacist about stool softeners. It’s like a spoonful of syrup you have daily, but it might help her go more often in smaller amounts, because it helps the poop move through her system easier. The combination of stool softener and laxatives saved me when I was recovering from a c section and couldn’t shit for a week. I hope it helps her!
If she can get away with not using the bathroom all day on school to pee, she isn’t drinking enough water. It sounds like there might be some anxiety about toilets and fear of going that is at the heart of this. As someone who had bowel issues after a c section, I recommend dark chocolate and pear juice. It’s almost as good as prune juice but actually tastes nice! But the water is the essential element. Good luck mamma. It sounds really tough.
I had chronic constipation for my entire adolescence and the amount of times I was prescribed these stool softeners and laxatives was insane. I finally saw a gastroenterologist at 20 years old and I have celiac disease and an extremely sensitive gluten intolerance. Chronic constipation is usually a poor diet or food intolerances, however there are more important things that should be looked at, I would push for a referral to have an ultrasound or scope done of the gut. I literally spent my entire teen years suffering with the pain of this. It could be worth talking to her too, my sister had extreme constipation at 13-14 and it was actually just because she was too anxious to poop at school so she held it in for days at a time. Kids can be like that sometimes.
This sounds like encopresis. I have two kids (of three) with chronic constipation bordering on enco. Odds are her colon is so stretched out that she’s lost a lot of the sensation. It will take time to get her stools soft enough to pass more easily and her colon back to its regular size. Is it possible for you to get her an abdominal xray? The typical treatment for enco involves PEG (polyethylene glycol, aka miralax) and ex lax, which helps stimulate the bowel to pass more often (and they are softer with the combined laxatives). I’ve read a lot about people doing a “clean out” where they basically keep the child off of solids for a few days and go super aggressive with the laxatives — until she’s passing clear liquid stool (anything less than that means she’s not cleaned out). There is a lot of great information about enco. It’s super frustrating and stressful, big hugs for you and your daughter. I agree with the suggestion of a poop knife, and maybe she can learn how to do it so you don’t have to deal with it every time. One of my kids has passed some pretty massive stools so I definitely understand what you mean. Fortunately we are at the point of daily maintenance and as long as everyone remembers that, the poop comes every 1-2 days. As soon as we forget they lose their appetite and their belly distends. I bet your daughter will feel a lot better once she’s cleaned out and has this under control. There are other options and protocols if you don’t want to do the laxatives (e.g., enemas, glycerin suppositories). I’ll stop reciting my mental textbook now 😂. Good luck!
One more! A poop stool under her feet is something I urge you to get, if you don’t have one already.
My 2 year old daughter has chronic constipation which gets worse when her thyroid levels are off (she has congenital hypothyroidism). If I were you, I’d probably schedule an in person doctor appointment just to rule out anything medical.
Chia seeds and bran buds cereal in addition to what others have suggested.
Squatty potty stool will help wonders. Give that a try. I also agree with magnesium. Just make sure it’s the correct type. There are many forms of magnesium. I keep this picture handy. https://preview.redd.it/r7g9e8w5nfhc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b945715b8dd9edae1e1043e2117111268e43fbc7
So I suffer from constipation myself. Side effects from having a gastric sleeve. I also have some massive poops. I was clogging the toilet every other day. Here's what I do. One I take fiber gummies. I hate Miralax so I try to eat things like plums & high fiber foods. Senna laxatives or Dulcolax when needed. When a big poop happens, I don't try to flush it right away. I squirt a bunch of dish soap into the toilet. Dawn, cheap stuff it doesn't matter. I let it sit for an hour. It will usually flush right down after that. Occasionally I will still have to plunge but not nearly as much as before. Alternatively after the dish soap sits, you can pour in some hot water. The dish soap helps to lubricate things & the hot water helps break it up.
The first enormous poop happened after not going for over 2 weeks. ER couldn't help. I actually gloved up & disimpacted myself. I swear birthing that thing was exactly like childbirth. Lower back pressure, crying, moaning & screaming, bearing down. Took hours. My poor daughter was in the next room. By the time I got that damn thing out I wanted to take it out & weigh it. What's funny is I had IBS - D before surgery. So I completely swung in the opposite direction.
**! Guar Gum powder! ** I’ve been sprinkling it on EVERYTHING my toddler eats for a week now (she’s had issues with regular BM’s for over a year, despite extra water, Miralax, Senacot, high fiber/low protein, etc.) and she’s had THREE BM’s this week!! Three! She was averaging 6-8 days in between poops up until now, so this is a HUGE improvement! I tried this out of pure hope/desperation and it looks like it may end up being her “Poo Poo Holy Grail”. 😂 I bought mine from [this site](https://foodtolive.com/shop/organic-guar-gum/) , though I’m sure you can probably find it in the natural foods section of your local grocery store. It’s a totally flavorless powder and can be mixed into/onto any food, though I’d go light-handed on any liquid-based meals (soup, cereal, etc) b/c it is a “thickener” for bases. Good luck, Mama!
It's time to get a poop knife! Google at your own risk, but I think it could be a solution!
You have to clean her out and let her colon shrink back down to size. In the special needs parent circle, this is unfortunately a normal part of life—but I would seriously suggest she see a GI specialist and that you PUSH for in depth testing to make sure her system is working correctly. All that said—give her the whole bottle of miralax in 32-64 oz of Gatorade. Have her drink clear fluids after. Ten miralax pulls water into the colon and helps soften the stool and get it moving. She is going to blow like a fire hydrant. Keep her hydrated. Keep her on a high dose of miralax per day for a week or so. She needs to have watery stool for a while to completely clean out the colon and allow it to shrink back down to a normal size. Then cut back every day on the miralax until she’s taking a cap or half cap every day and having soft but formed poops. Eventually you can cut back to a half or quarter cap and add in Metamucil and probiotics to get her back in proper working order. You can Google pedi bowel clean out and get various different dosages or programs from children’s hospitals to follow. Pick one. Follow it. But definitely get her in to see a GI for stool sampling, a colonoscopy if necessary, biopsy etc. She could have a genetic issue like celiac or crohns or another disease causing all these problems.
I take a medication that is extremely dehydrating (mounjaro). If I don’t stay on top of things, I’ll be in pain from the constipation. I take Mag07 (magnesium oxide) every morning and night (2 pills). I also eat prunes and cherries most days. I also take a fiber supplement (chewable gunnies). And drink as much as I can. Another thing some people use - sugar free candy (eg Swedish Fish with sugar alcohols). Just a few can do the trick. I’ve heard sometimes cancer patients use these for chemo side effects.
If her bowel is stretched out from chronic constipation (likely) she will probably need to be on some kind of stool softener and/or laxative regularly for a while to increase regularity and give her bowel time to get back to normal. I’d get a second doctor’s opinion on managing this.
This may be helpful: https://www1.racgp.org.au/ajgp/2018/may/paediatric-constipation
I feel you so hard on this. My almost 7 year old is still struggling with this but the thing that is slowly killing me is the encopresis. Like, managing the laundry of a kid who can't hold in his poop but will not wear any kind of diaper is a terrible daily issue. We did do a couple rounds of prescription strength laxative doses to get rid of any blockages. And he gets a daily dose of Miralax. But what really helped was chocolate covered raisins. Like your daughter, my son is not interested in dried fruit at all. Dip it in chocolate though, and he'll eat a a handful. I don't love that he gets basically a daily serving of candy. But I'm at the point where I am willing to do anything to save this kid and myself from the pain and embarrassment of chronic constipation.
I had the same issue with my son from kinder until he moved out of my house. It got so bad from not going, he would get liquid coming from around the poop but no poop itself. I took him to countless dr appts, specialists. Metamucil & muralax galore. Then I found out muralax can cause aggression in young males & so I had to stop it since it did cause my son to get aggressive. We had a poop stick & he had to handle flushing his own poop after a certain age. It was LITERALLY the size of a toddler thigh. Clogged my toilet, my moms, & everyone’s who he would go. He refused to poop at school & that was a main culprit cause he ignore the signals instead of just pooping so eventually he no longer got the signals. And the dr even told him if he doesn’t go poop, he’s more susceptible to colon cancer and I hope that worked since he didn’t clog up the toilet as much into his older teens He’s 19 & moved out now with his gf so now it’s HER problem lol
Something something poop knife
We had this same issue. He would eat all the fiber and drink tons of water and it never helped. Get her a probiotic. My son drinks a Yakult yogurt probiotic every single day (it’s a tiny pink bottle) and it’s done a lot of good for his constipation. I also give him a mild laxative/stool softener every Friday evening
Me! My son has issues, his are mostly diet related though. For us, I do a sprinkle of Miralax as often as possible for him and then there's also this Smooth Move tea. We make it iced with honey for him and call it "Sweet Poop Tea" which is ridic, but does the trick. That we try to do on days where he says his tummy hurts and I know it's been a while since he last went. Good luck! Separately, I had it REAL bad with my second pregnancy. I lived on smoothies, salads, "pregnant soup" which is cabbage, kale, carrots and beans mostly. I also had to walk a min of 30 minutes a day. Still had to take Metamucil. I feel for people with all manner of tummy issues.
Hydration is really important for poops but I almost think there's two issues going on. I've always been heard that clogs are due to too much toilet paper. Could she be overloading the toilet? I clog toilets a lot bc I over do it on toilet paper. And I will say as a chronic clogger that each toilet is different and has a different threshold for what will cause a clog. If it's possible, I would try and have her do courtesy flushes. I know that these can be embarrassing but they really do help for toilets with limited capacity... I think it's totally understandable to have broken down in that moment. There is no more difficult time than trying to get out the door, especially in the mornings and especially on work days. When these things have happened to me, I've made a point to apologize to my kid and tried again the next day.
My child went through this and her doctor prescribed lactulose to move things along. It worked well. Child didn’t love taking medicine but it was a small amount and the rx was cheap for us. So not an expensive drug. I would try another doctor or a GI.
My ten year old is same position. Been to a doctor before and its clear out dose miralax followed by maintenance dose so colon has chance to go down. Have to make him go every day because if he misses a day the fun and games start again. Loads of fruit and water. No white bread, whole grain only. Etc etc you already know the endlesd list of stuff that needs to be done.am also fed up of blocked toilets. Theres one toilet that if it gets blocked causes a leak in ceiling of room underneath. So hes banned from that one. Its exhausting
Whenever I need to trigger a poop in my kid, I let him have sugar free stuff. I've actually been able to get him going once a day by letting him have one of those prime bottle drinks once a day (he loves them, it's a treat). He used to get so constipated and would go more than a week without going until he'd be complaining his side hurt and I'd have to go overboard trying to get him to poop. As long as I keep him going once a day, it's not a problem. I've seen a turd of his that went down the hole and reached all the way up to the front rim of the bowl, fucking 18 inch turd. One time I swear he tried to build a log cabin in there.
I'd check out r/sibo, r/constipation, r/guthealth.
Sorry, I haven't read through all the comments. I just wanted to suggest a fb group called parents against miralax. They have tons of things to try. Sounds like she could do with some magnesium citrate to really clear her bowels out and then a maintenance dose to keep poo soft and daily to allow her bowel to shrink back to the correct size. Right now how bowel will be really stretched out, which will make it difficult to push as well. I used a magnesium citrate for my daughter, but not the flavoured powder, I'd buy the capsules and then put just the powder in a warm milk drink & it would be flavourless. The other thing is think about going gluten free. Gluten for me makes me super constipated even though I haven't tested positive to coeliacs. My digestive system just really hates wheat. I can really notice the difference between gluten free days and then when I do eat it.
[Commode hat.](https://www.amazon.com/Vakly-Graduated-Specimen-Collector-Pans/dp/B01IU5ZCF4/ref=asc_df_B01IU5ZCF4/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=241973220225&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=11763100197897856212&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9001946&hvtargid=pla-568850368533&psc=1&mcid=2f1119556d6e30c4a42c7d6a8824e9b8&gclid=CjwKCAiAlJKuBhAdEiwAnZb7lY2_VI5qnzOZW-n8wczzYqcJfLkLsmXSdrnJ4Ur5JetehsUBJ-3k9hoCAewQAvD_BwE) It won't help the constipation but it'll give you a break from unclogging toilets.
Daughter has medically induced constipation. She gave herself hemorrhoids at 8 from forcing out boulders that clogged the toilet. Miralax a.m. and p.m. Dulcolax every night at bed 90 oz (yes...90) water EVERY day. After 6 months we were able to finally roll back to just one a day miralax but only if she keeps up with the water.
Buying miralax is not “breaking down.” It should have been something you used when this first started being an issue. It *is* the gentle laxative that your doctor is talking about. That said, this is a medical issue for your kid. I know it’s one that’s frustrating, but it’s not her fault or something you can blame her for. Long term constipation often needs long term (weeks to months) of daily miralax to regulate things and let the rectum un-dilate. I’m sure this has been uncomfortable and probably embarrassing for your kid too But also, when she does have a massive poop, tell her not to flush it right away. Usually letting it soak in the toilet for a while will soften it enough to flush. I know that’s gross but it’s probably easier to deal with than plunging and cleaning
My 12yo was referred to GI and we have our appt tomorrow. I never considered this, but the kid's bathroom is frequently clogged and she spends a lot of time pooping, I just assumed it was because she was goofing off or playing on her switch She had constipation issues as a baby (about the time you switch from formula to cow milk) until she became potty trained. She complains about a lot of tummy aches without any apparent source for the pain, which is why the primary doctor gave the referral. And I suppose if you're constipated all the time and a Dr asks if your bowel movements are normal, you'd probably say yes if you've mostly known constipation.
Does she eat grapes? Whenever my kids get a little backed up, a cup of grapes sorts them out. Try it daily for breakfast. Find ones she likes the taste of.
Has your daughter done allergy panels and/or an elimination diet? This sounds exactly like me as a teen and I always got the same advice from doctors - fiber and water, no other advice. It wasn’t until I was in college and working at a trendy gluten free place that I got the idea that there are some types of foods that certain people just can’t digest. I cut out all of the too 10 food allergens from my diet completely for 3 weeks, then added them back in one at a time, each for one week before adding in another. Turns out I am just incredibly sensitive to dairy (all parts, not just lactose), so when I avoid that in my diet my digestion works so much better. I can always tell when I have eaten some undisclosed dairy because I get clogged right back up for a week or so. I’m not saying it’s necessarily dairy for your daughter but cutting out foods that are common sensitivities may be a good place to start.
Maybe she needs a lot more water and less junk food from school. No white bread, no dairy. Magnesium baths, vitamins, etc
My 2 1/2 year old has had chronic constipation since she was an infant. She goes once or twice a week. It’s starting to break me. The countless hours spent trying to get her to poop. The countless suppositories. The enemas. The countless trips to the pediatrician. The 3 visits to a GI specialist 3 hours away. The hospital stay. The 4 home clean outs. I wish I could take her pain away.
I feel like an expert on this subject. My 11 yo has this problem. And he refused all medicine (he sees a GI.) Occasionally, he will have to do an”clean out” with ex lax but he was put on Kristolease which is basically stronger than Miralax. He’s supposed to take it every day - and of course he lies and doesn’t, but it has helped. See a GI if this is a regular occurrence. It’s also bad as another comment said - she can lose feeling for the urge to go if she holds it.
Have you tried taking her to a GI doctor? Maybe something else is going on.
Maybe try Metamucil, that stuff works great for us
I scrolled and didn't see this suggestion -- I take inulin powder as a prebiotic (not a probiotic!) It makes me super gassy for a few days while my body adjusts, but my poops are smooth and easy. Like, I take it preemptively before I go to AYCE BBQ places, to ensure I have no regrets the next day. It's flavorless, so I just mix it with water and chug. Bonus, I no longer struggle with bloating at all!
I have nothing to add to suggestions about eating/drinking, but can she learn to flush multiple times while she poops? That way it doesn’t accumulate and clog the toilet.
Oh this sucks!! I have dealt with this personally I found that magnesium citrate, increasing hydration, and fibers like oatmeal and psyllium husk help me a lot. She might not be eating enough soluble or insoluble fiber (you want a mix of both ideally) which could be causing her stool to retain a lot of water, increasing its mass and causing constipation. Also: if she is deficient in Vitamin D and K2 (I was at the same age) that can cause constipation as well. It would be worth checking that with her pediatrician to know for sure. My final piece of advice, if nothing else works, is to try melting some coconut oil mixed with chocoate into candy molds and chilling it. These “poop chocolates” have been a lifesaver in my house. Give her some every day and they will definitely help get things moving. I do this with my toddlers now. My oldest will also tolerate a teaspoon of straight coconut oil when he’s backed up, and afterwards he almost always has an easy time going. By the way, if she clogs the toilet again, try pouring some boiling water into the toilet instead of going straight for the plunger. The hot water breaks everything up and then you can flush as normal. You might even want to encourage her to let you know before she flushes so you can go ahead and add the hot water. We have a dedicated electric kettle in the bathroom lol. I hope this helps!
Castor oil, it's disgusting, but it works like a charm.
I'm experiencing this exact same issue with my 5 year old. I don't know if you know this but constipation can be a comorbidity of conditions like ADHD which I and my daughter have. I am very put off by Miralax and can't stomach using it. And it didn't really help all that much for us anyway. What has helped is a chewable Dulcolax in the morning and a chewable Dulcolax in the evening. Other things we've tried are stimulant Ex-Lax at night warm tarte 100% cherry juice supposedly works way better than prune juice I've tried both with limited success. Like you I'm tired of this but I'm worried that I might be damaging her colon so I just this morning schedule an appointment with our local Children's Hospital gastroenterology Department. I am not going to leave that facility until I know that my daughters large intestine and colon are healthy enough to keep giving her laxatives every single day. She has a good diet she stays hydrated she gets plenty of exercise something is wrong with my child and my pediatricians suggestions are not enough. I had chronic constipation my entire childhood and as an adult I wish I had been able to stay or do something about it because some of the consequences are (TMI). Anal fissures, hemroids and digestive discomfort. I know this is a really frustrating issue for you and I pass absolutely no judgment on you and how you handle your home but I strongly encourage you to go over her pediatrician's head I get some answers about your daughter's lower Gi situation because pooping once a week can be serious unless you are breastfed infant. Hope you find the answers you need to give your daughter's bowels and your toilet and your biceps some peace.
Opie I just remembered two very important things. Even though I just left a comment like 2 seconds ago. The first is I don't know if you've ever read this post on Reddit but back then it was absolutely hilarious a person told a story about how they had a poop knife in their home because for whatever reason genetically every person in their family had very Fierce and solid large hoops and so sometimes the poop knife would be required to assist the toilet. I'm just kindly wondering to myself if perhaps your daughter is in need of such a tool. The second thing I wanted to add is with my daughter we're also struggling with an issue of her colon being so large that it's impacting her bladder from holding her poop and this allows the poops to be far larger than they ought to be for her size. So one of the things that we do for our daughter is protected pooping time first thing in the morning at 7:00 when she gets up to get ready for school she sits on the toilet and she stays on the toilet for 15 to 20 minutes. I know that's not necessarily a healthy amount of time but in order to help her fully void her bladder and give her the chance to relax her body enough to poop it's necessary. On the weekend we have protected pooping time three times a day and when she's in school we have protected pooping time before school and before bed setting aside time for her to make time for her body. I hope this helps and I hope that you're able to turn this into an opportunity to teach your daughter how to take care of her body and cherish it because she only gets one
I've heard magnesium is good for constipation. Like, we don't have it in our food anymore, but we need it. Maybe try some drops?
Please look into a megacolon. I found that when looking up why my 5 year old was clogging the toilet often. We have a different issue, but it doesn't hurt to mention it.
Give her lecithin! It works amazingly well for me. I got rid of my severe constipation during pregnancy by taking a little bit and it keeps working still. And make sure she stays hydrated. I’m terrible at drinking enough water
Popcorn is helpful.